Is It Really Better This Way?
by InvaderWeb
Summary: As if by a twist of fate, Sakura's team ends up training with other ninja groups. This week's students: Gai's.
1. Teams are chosen

Hello all! Since I got so many encouraging reviews in my first story (I'm still surprise I even got ONE review!) I decided to make another one! I was eating spaghetti that my mom made one day and while I was swirling the stuff around my fork I got this really cute idea!

**Is It Really Better This Way?**

It was a beautiful cool September afternoon, the last days of the _real_ summer heat had diminished and the feeling of fall was on its way. It would have been a beautiful day for one last dive in the lake, one last picnic before the chill of winter came, or wearing that short summer skirt for one last "hurrah." Sadly, I, Haruno Sakura, was instead spending it on _training_. Not just _any _kind of usual training either. Naruto wouldn't stop whining, Sasuke still acted like he had a twisted pole up his ass, and good ol' Kakashi Sensei was reading that perverted little book of his without a care in the world. As for the rest of my new "team," they could care less about us.

For some apparent "really good reason" some _idiot_ concerned with the lack of cooperation in current missions decided for teams to be _paired off_ with other teams. This was supposedly to "further promote teamwork and the amities of fellow ninja!" If you ask me it's a bunch of bull.

Last week we were paired off with team Kurenai of all teams. Personally, I didn't find a problem with the dog lover, bug lover, and Naruto lover, but apparently my other teammates had a different perspective. Naruto and Kiba wouldn't stop fighting over who was going to be the "leader," Sasuke refused to acknowledge them, and Hinata wouldn't do anything but look like the equivalent of a cherry whenever Naruto so much as _looked_ at her. The only ones who _somehow_ managed to get as far as sparring done were Shino and me. He was too quiet to care and I too agitated to even speak.

This week I expected it to be no different as Kakashi Sensei revealed our cruel fate that morning. "Today you will be paired with…uh…" he scratched his head in deep thought, pretending to either not remember or not care. At the sound of my veins popping in frustration he quickly gave us an answer. "Ah yes, this week you will all be with Gai's team."

I'm guessing the expressions on our faces were priceless since even Sensei's right eye perked up in interest. My face was twisted in a mix of disgust and confusion, Naruto's in a face of pure annoyance, and Sasuke's a face of pure horror. With our fates sealed and our pleas ignored, we went off to find our three counterparts.

As agreed at a brief meeting, Gai Sensei would be waiting for us at the training grounds to begin our "youthful" lessons. I still shudder whenever I think of that creepy teacher. As soon as we caught glimpse of his infamous green attire, Gai Sensei thought it "nice" of him to dash to our sides and hold us in a violent death hug that threatened the very air in our lungs to diminish.

"I am so proud to be able to work with my friendly rival's YOUTHFUL students! Come! Let us begin our training at once!" he roared.

We found a scowling Neji and a nervous Tenten looking our way, as for Lee…he was no where to be found.

"Hey! Where's Bushy Brows?" Naruto asked in a voice rivaling that of Gai's a few moments ago.

The green clad older man gave him a smile so bright that it nearly blinded us and explained rather loudly. "It seemed my beloved student could not stand the waiting and decided to do a few laps around Konoha. Do not miss him for he will be back soon!"

Kakashi quirked an eyebrow, making us cringe with fear of what he was going to say. "Running…now…doesn't that sound like…fun?"

"NO!" all five adolescents screamed back at him.

_Ten minutes of arguing later..._

"Stupid…Sensei…making us…run like…THIS!" I screamed between pants. The only people of my new "team" who sucked it up were Sasuke and Neji, who would happily much rather run than spar with one another. Naruto and Tenten only _wished_ they could be doing as well as them.

Between one of my raspy breaths I saw a green blur pass my eyes, I shrugged and thought it was my imagination playing tricks on my dehydrated body. No sooner did I so much as _blink_ until I saw the same green blur again, and again, and again…and _again._ I stopped running long enough to try and see what that _blur_ was. Was that…Lee?

Suddenly, out of a whim of wickedness, I dragged a rather large log of wood into the road and waited for the blur to appear again. It did, and Lee came crashing down on the ground face first.

"Oh Lee, you should really watch where you're going!" I pointed out rather innocently all while oppressing a giggle.

Lee quickly got back up, dusted himself off, and continued to run in that inhuman velocity of his. If he had heard me he gave no signs of it. I stared in disbelief not because of his speed, but because he, the boy who once confessed he loved me, had continued to run as if I hadn't been there.

The puff of dust he left behind was the only thing of his that greeted me that morning.

Well…I don't know what to say about this. I hoped you liked it and I'll update depending on what my reviews recommend. Ciao!


	2. He Doesn't See me Like Before

Hello alo! Thank you for your reviews! It really gives me that extra push ya know? So like I said before, recommend and I will update! Enjoy!

**He Doesn't See Me Like Before**

The rest of the uneventful day wore on at a lazy pace as we continued to train for the remainder of the morning. We would all alternate on sparing partners until we either grew tired or bored. Luckily for me since there were only five of us I got to rest my tired body more often.

"Say Sakura, since you're not doing anything would you mind looking for Lee? He _has_ been gone for a while and could use the break if he is still running." Kakashi Sensei casually said to me. He probably said it to keep me from resting _too _much, that jerk.

I angrily sighed and stormed out of the training grounds to look for the boy who had just completely ignored me.

I jogged a safe distance before walking leisurely (just enough to escape Kakashi's all knowing lazy eye) and kneeled down at a nearby river for a drink. "Why should _I_ have to be the one to look for him? Why don't his _teammates_ go huh?" I grumbled as I splashed my face with the cool water.

"Look for who?" asked a deep masculine voice. I shrieked and nearly jumped in terror at the sudden intrusion. The fear quickened when I found myself loosing my balance to the slippery edge of the river. My feet frantically tried in vain to grab a hold of hard land but found nothing but slick mud. My eye widened twice their size as I realized I was going to come crashing down much like Lee had earlier in the morning. Karma was indeed a powerful thing.

Again without warning, a strong arm snaked its way around my waist to stop my fall. When I allowed myself to blink a few times I found that my face was mere inches away from the slippery sharp stones of the merciless river. The cool water slapped at my face, almost begging me to join it, yet the arm pulled me back to the sanctity of hard mud. I turned my face around to see my rescuer and found a pair of deep black eyes instead.

"Please accept my deepest apologies Sakura! I thought you knew I was there…I did not expect for you to be so frightened!" The sound of Lee's voice pulled me out of my trance.

"It-It-It's okay…I-I guess…I was just…shaken up a little..th-that's all..." was all I could muster.

He gave me a warm smile and brought me further away from the relentless river to a soft patch of grass. It was only when he set me down that I noticed that he had finally taken his protective arm away from my waist. Once again I looked up at my savior. Though still dressed in his usual green jumpsuit, I could see he had grown tremendously (and in all the right places I might add.) He was no longer the scrawny boy I had seen less than two years ago. For a second I could not believe that this person _was_ Lee. This _man_ had grown in height, strength, and body structure. Were those _muscles_ that I had felt around my waist?

"Sakura? Are you all right? Sakura?" Lee must've seen the dreamy look on my face for his face was burning up almost as much as mine was. One could tell he was uncomfortable when it came to people looking at him this much without saying anything.

"Huh? Yeah-yeah I'm fine…just…," I couldn't help but steal another glimpse of his toned body, "…_fine_…"

"Well…that is _fine_ too then…" he replied, copying my tone of voice. His arm once again reached for me and pulled me back on my feet with ease. "We should go back."

I dumbly nodded and led him to the road leading to the rest of our teammates. As we were walking curiosity struck me over our morning incident. "Lee?"

"Hm?"

"Why did you ignore me this morning?"

"Hm? Ignore you? When?" he asked rather indifferently.

"Don't play dumb! It was when I put the log in the middle of the road so you'd _trip_! You got up and kept running without saying a word!" I was certainly teeming with rage by now at the thought of _him_ of all people ignoring _me_, why I didn't know.

"Sakura when I am training, I focus solely on it and see nothing else in my surroundings. Neji once had to catch up to me and _tackle_ me when I was not listening to him! That is nothing compared to what Tenten had to do one day when-_wait_-it was _you _who placed that painful log on the road? That _HURT_ SAKURA!" He yelled in annoyance. This was probably the first (and last) time I ever saw a hint of irritation on his face. Too bad he couldn't pull the look off too well because I started to crack up. I couldn't help myself! He _almost _looked cute, like a child angry at his parents for some trivial thing!

At the sound of my laughter Lee immediately calmed down and stared at the ground in embarrassment. I cocked my head as if inquiring him on his coy behavior.

"Th-that..that is the first time…I have heard you laugh at something I have done or said…" he mumbled, his eyes glued on the floor.

I shrugged. "You're a funny person, and even after all this time apart, you're _still_ fun to be around with."

His blush deepened by several degrees as we continued to walk. It wasn't long before we saw the figures of our four teammates lying down underneath a huge tree, exhausted to say the least.

"Hello friends! Where are our senseis?" Lee asked, but merely got eight shrugging shoulders in return.

"Sensei said something about some ramen eating contest to settle their score…I wasn't really listening to them…but the training is over, at least for now. We still need to come back in the afternoon." groaned Tenten as she managed to get up by leaning her weight on the tree.

"Training…is over?" repeated Lee. I could swear there was a hint of disappointment in his voice.

"Yeah it is and I'm glad too! HEY! Since we have to be back here in a few hours why don't we all go get lunch?" screamed Naruto all while jumping up and down like the retarded monkey he is.

"NO RAMEN!" yelled Sasuke and Neji in unison.

Naruto pouted and lied back down. "Okay _fine_, no ramen, but we still need to get _something_. Who wants to go!" it wasn't even a question, it was a loud statement.

All I heard was a grunt and "hn" from Sasuke and Neji (respectively.) Tenten merely nodded as she tried to stretch her wary muscles. Naruto looked at his remaining teammates for an answer. I furiously shook my head (I did _not _want to be around this combination of people while they decided _where_ to eat; it was just a huge fight waiting to happen.) My eyes shifted to Lee as he too declined his invitation. The hyperactive ninja sighed in disappointment and literally _dragged _away the three poor souls who had decided to go with him.

"It is nice to know that some of us will never change," Lee commented before he started to walk away.

"Hey, wait, Lee where are you going?" I asked a bit worriedly. _'What is it with Lee? Usually he'd be swooning over me if he ever got the chance to be alone with me!'_

"Honestly, I do not know, to train some more I suppose," he replied indifferently.

"Aren't you hungry? Don't you want to get something to eat?" I asked before I clamped my mouth shut with my hands. _'Great…now it sounded like I asked him out…real smooth Sakura…reeeal smooth, now he's going to be ecstatic.'_

Much to my utter surprise (and disappointment), Lee shrugged in that new casual way of his. "I do not really eat lunch…then again I do not really eat breakfast either."

"Lee, you must be _starving_ then! Come on, if you're too lazy to go to a restaurant then you can go to my house and eat with me there!" I said in an almost _too_ cheery voice.

He cocked an eyebrow at my sudden friendliness, yet smiled, nodded, and walked with me home.

When I finally opened the door to my house I was met with silence. _'My mom must be out,'_ were my first thoughts as Lee walked inside. It's not that I minded him being here while I was alone, but I was hoping to introduce at least _one_ of my friends to my mom. She would always bicker with me about meeting them.

"Do you live alone?" I heard Lee ask. I shook my head and walked towards the kitchen.

"My mom is usually here, though I think she probably went to the store."

"Ah." was his dry reply. I noticed that this man was no longer the talkative and outgoing boy I used to know not so long ago. He had changed, his silent motions were reminding me a certain boy I was infatuated with when I was younger and much more naïve. What had changed him so much? Wanting to do anything but further stare at Lee like an idiot, I concentrated on opening the fridge and getting two bottles of water for us. While I was doing that my eyes scanned over the contents of my fridge. I almost laughed at what I saw and hoped that my mom really _was _at the grocery store. The foods consisted of grapes, a half-empty bottle of milk, bread, and a box of cereal…what the latter was doing there I do not know.

I suddenly felt the same presence I felt at the river stand behind me. "Lee, do you _want_ me to jump inside my fridge with fear like I did in the river?"

His laughter filled my empty house. "Sorry, I wanted to see if you would fall for it again."

"Well…_don't_." I warned as I tossed him his water bottle. He thanked me and gulped it down in a matter of seconds. Staring in fascination I gave him my other bottle just to see the action repeated.

"Uh…Lee…I don't think I have a lot of food here. My mom and I are too busy with something else most of the time to worry about grocery shopping." I pointed out as I checked the cabinets at the top of my cupboards for anything that looked edible. I couldn't even _see_ what I supposed to be looking for considering I was standing up on a chair! Again I felt strong hands clasp my waist and pull me down to the ground.

"You can ask me you know. It is rude not to help a woman." he said in a rather offended tone. He looked into the cabinets without so much as standing on the tips of his feet. With ease he took out some uncooked pasta, salt, vinegar, and bread.

"What am I going to do with those?" I asked with a puzzled look upon my face. "I-I-I…don't know how to cook." My face grew red at my confession.

"_You_ are to do nothing,_ I_ will cook for you. You have been kind enough to invite me over and the least I can do is make you a home cooked meal." He said in that same "cool" and detached voice of his that I had grown to somehow abhor.

"Well can I at least _get_ you anything?" I asked with a pout.

"Tomatoes and ground beef, also some garlic and basil if you have them," Lee said while deep in thought. "If your cooking skills are so terrible that you have not guessed at what I am cooking then I will tell you that is it spaghetti." He added all while giving me a devilish smirk.

'_Did he just tease me?'_

Being with this new Lee was frustrating and exhilarating to say the least. He almost made me feel like a helpless girl, yet at the same time like a woman who deserved to be treated like a princess. My hands suddenly found some tomatoes and herbs in the fridge and gave them to Lee. He thanked me with a smile and handed me a knife.

"Wha-"

"You said you did not know how to cook. I will teach you."

I stared at him once more (it seemed I had been doing that all day since I saw him.) With trembling fingers I took the knife and gave my best effort at cutting tomatoes into large cubes.

"You know Lee, we have tomato sauce in the fridge." I hinted that there was no need to do such labor for tomato sauce.

"I know, I saw it, but it is so much better to do it from scratch. That way the taste is fresh and you do not get all the preservatives." He replied in a matter of fact tone.

I could not help but stare in awe at his hands doing such small tasks. My eyes traveled over his long fingers grabbing hold of the stiff pasta and breaking it in small pieces, his arm reaching for a heavy pot that he lifted with ease, his eyes completely focused on the boiling water, his lips moving at a medium pace.

"…and then while the pasta is boiling I will teach you how to make the sauce and cook the meat…are you listening?" the sound of his deep voice nearly startled me. I nodded dumbly, but grimaced in horror as he opened the packet of raw meat.

"What is the matter?" he asked slyly as he placed the beef on a cutting board and grabbed a fistful of meat to aggravate my disgust. "Never touched raw meat before or what?"

I violently shook my head as he offered me a rolled up ball of the repulsive red meat. He chuckled in amusement as I shut my eyes and nearly shrieked when he took my hand and gently placed a piece of beef in it. It felt squishy, slimy, and had a soft wet texture to it. As if I was expecting my hand to be blown off by the raw food, my eyes slowly opened in amazement.

"See? Not so bad is it? Now come, you are going to learn to how make meatballs. First you take a small piece of meat and roll it up with both hands just like a piece of clay." He demonstrated and I followed.

We spent the rest of our break teaching me how to safely pour the scalding water out of the spaghetti pot, how to make the sauce, and other kitchen know-how. I have to say that I was pretty damn proud of myself after we were done.

"Lee…you've…changed." I muttered while we set the table and sat down. He looked up from his plate in surprised, almost like he had barely found out there was someone sitting right next to him.

"How so?"

I shrugged and swirled the pasta around with my fork. "I don't know…you're more serious than before…did something happen?"

He returned his attention back to his plate and contemplated his answer. "I-I suppose I just grew up…we all have to grow up someday Sakura." His dark eyes shot back up to meet mine for a few seconds before we both bowed our heads in embarrassment. "I grew out of being Gai's 'prized student,' I grew out of my wanting to always jump in a fight without thinking first, I grew out of my silly rivalry with Neji and Sasuke, I grew…out of…silly crushes." He said the last part with the same monotone as the rest of his words. His words were to the point and brisk, and yet why did it feel like they had struck something in me? I never liked him; I was always too busy drooling over "Sasuke-kun" to care.

His eyes wandered over to the clock on the wall and widened in shock. "Sakura! We must hurry if we are to make it to training on time!" he exclaimed all while gulping down his lunch. I was violently shaken out of my thoughts as I slurped down my spaghetti with gusto and speed.

'_Weird…Tenten never told us what time we were supposed to be back…' _were my last thoughts as we bolted out my door.

Well there you have it! I'm staring my FIRST chapter story and I couldn't be prouder of myself! Thanks to all of you who are reviewing and those who WILL review! You are really keeping my hopes up with this story!


	3. Swimming Lessons

Thanks SO much for all my reviews! You have no IDEA how surprised I am at how many people actually LIKE the new Lee. I thought you'd be all "Why's Lee like that? Huh? Huh? Change him back!" or something like that, but now I know that I made a good decision in changing him a bit, (I mean he HAS to mature somewhat after two years don't you think?) So as always enjoy and recommend stuff to me! Ciao!

**Swimming Lessons…**

We ran back to the training grounds to find our teammates and senseis by a river, already waiting for us impatiently. Sasuke and Naruto both eyed me suspiciously as we arrived. My cheeks were a light pink from the sudden running and I could tell I was already sweating. I looked over at Lee who appeared like he hadn't even taken two _steps_ to get here.

"And where were _you_ two?" Naruto was the first to speak as he folded his arms over his chest. Sasuke and Kakashi Sensei looked like they wanted to know the same thing.

I racked by brain for answers, completely forgetting what we had done. My voice was an arid whisper against my sandpaper throat. I opened my mouth again but Lee's clear strong voice was heard instead of mine.

"We were out for lunch and we lost track of time."

'_Well, it works better than saying we were at my _**house**_ of all places…at least it's not a **total** lie…'_

There was a pregnant silence until Kakashi cleared his throat. "Well, now that you two have finally decided to show up I guess you won't mind going _first_."

I gave him a perplexed look. "Be the first for what?"

Under that mask I could've sworn Kakashi was smiling. "To be the first at…a little game."

"Does this game include _swimming_ by any chance? It is only obvious since we are so close to a river." Lee said in a bored tone.

Gai Sensei looked over at Lee and laughed. "Lee you will always be one of my most youthful and smartest students! Yes of _course_ this exercise will include water…but there is something I must tell you all that could _possibly_ change the way you look at swimming for the rest…of…your…._life_…"

All six adolescents leaned closer with curiosity at their Sensei's last words.

"You will all…further control…the chakra in your body and lungs by learning…to hold your breath."

At this everyone looked at him like he was speaking a different language.

"I already _learned_ how to hold my breath underwater when I was _little_! Can't you teach us something we don't already _know_?" yelled Naruto in that annoyed tone of his.

"The idiot is right…for once." Sasuke added, receiving a nod from Neji and a glare from the blonde.

Kakashi shook his head at his student's misunderstanding. "You don't understand as usual Naruto, what Gai left out was that you will all learn to hold your breaths underwater for the_ minimum _of twenty minutes. At least, that's how long we're _hoping_ _you'll_ last, assuming the pressure of the tides and the freezing temperature of the water doesn't _kill_ you first." He said smugly to get Naruto fired up. This, he achieved, for Naruto was already taking his shirt off to get started and prove his sensei wrong.

Following Naruto's actions (and totally ignoring the fact that Tenten and I were present) Neji and Sasuke also took off _their_ shirts and _threw_ them aside as if to further emphasize their machismo. Lee looked at them and then at us for a reaction. Coming to the conclusion that we didn't mind, he also removed his shirt, but kept his bandages tightly wrapped around his hands and arms.

At this point a crimson Tenten quickly turned around to look at _anything _but them and I glued my eyes to the floor, neither of us knowing what to make of this awkward situation.

I could just _feel_ Naruto's eyes on me as he snickered and said, "Sakura, since you're going first shouldn't you be taking off _your_ shirt too?"

My fist sent him flying against a tree as soon as he finished his sentence. I looked at my sensei for advice. He only shrugged. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to, but you will have more difficulty mastering this exercise with wet clothes constricting your chest."

"Same goes for Tenten." Gai added while looking at the blushing girl who wouldn't dare lift her gaze up. "You are all ninja despite your gender. _True_ ninja train no matter _what_ the circumstances."

"Of course if you're _that _uncomfortable we can always just make the boys keep the shirts _on_ too, though it will make it more difficult for them to complete the exercise." Kakashi offered all while giving the vexed boys a hidden smirk.

Tenten's eyes met my own, mine were uncertain but hers were no longer nervous and showed a deep sense of determination.

"I-I don't mind Gai Sensei…I will train no matter what I'm faced with." She looked at me and smiled. "Sakura, you're lucky! I just happen to have _two _undershirts in my backpack; I'll lend you one okay?"

I smiled back and thanked whatever god that existed for my luck. I heard Naruto groan in disappointment at the thought of not seeing me in a bra and I made a mental note to beat him up later.

We both made everyone turn around and swear on their honor as a ninja _not_ to look as we changed behind some bushes.

"So what do you think of the guys? Even Naruto looks good…" Tenten whispered to me while she handed me a white spaghetti-strapped undershirt.

"Tenten! You _looked_?" I hissed back in my lowest voice. I thought about taking off my dark spandex shorts, but decided against it considering Tenten wasn't removing hers.

"Well how could you _not_? Haven't you _ever_ wondered how your teammates looked like _shirtless_?"

"Well…maybe Sasuke-but that was when I was younger! Now the thought of them shirtless…is like…weird." I admitted. "Though Neji _did _look like he was working out!"

We both softy giggled uncontrollably at our schoolgirl behavior.

"But he's not who I meant Sakura…what'd you think of…well you _know_…" she started.

I stared blankly at her.

"Lee! Sakura, what'd you think of _Lee_?"

"Oh! Well, uh…I-I didn't really get a look of him." I replied honestly.

She sighed in exasperation.

"Why'd you mention him?" I asked in defense.

"Well he _was_ only right _next_ to you-"

"That's not the point! Why would you think I would only be looking at _Lee_ and not-"

"Sakura, Tenten, I'm pretty sure you're _both_ done by now judging by the sound of your incessant chattering." we heard Kakashi say to us in a scolding tone.

We both yelped and quickly jumped out of the bushes to find four boys with their mouths and eyes _wide_ open.

'_Crap…were we talking loud enough for them to hear?'_ my mind screamed at me. Judging from the look on Tenten's face I could only assume she was thinking the same thing I was. I dared not meet Lee's face.

"Now to start us off, my dear rival Kakashi shall introduce the concept of being submerged in water with no air to satisfy his YOUTHFUL lungs!" Gai said in his thundering voice.

"Hey…why do _I_ have to be the one to get wet?" asked his "friendly rival." I could tell he did NOT like the idea.

"Very well then, _be _unyouthful Kakashi! Neji! Come hither my genius!" Gai yelled as he grabbed the unprepared (and still shocked) Hyuga prodigy by his pants and plunged him into the icy river. "Notice how I forcibly keep his head down with my hand to keep him from breathing my students!"

We could all tell Neji was about to go through some serious trauma if he didn't resurface soon.

"Sensei…Neji is just as new to this lesson as the rest of us are…I do not think it wise to keep him in the water for long…he might uh, _drown_." Lee advised while looking at the struggling Neji underwater.

"Oh, how right you are my prized student! Neji I apologize!" Gai screamed in horror as he violently pulled Neji by his arm out of the frigid water. Even _I_ felt sorry for Neji as he choked on the water and rasped for fresh air.

"Now then Lee! Have I not taught _you _this exercise once?" Gai asked as he patted the choking Neji's back.

"Yes…briefly. I choked, nearly drowned, blacked out, and woke up three days later in the hospital, remember?" Lee answered in the most casual voice I had heard him use so far. How could he ACT so _cool _over this? The detachment in his voice made a near death experience seem as trivial as saying he went to the _store_.

"Ah yes, how could I have forgotten? Very well my student, are you ready to try once more?" Gai inquired as if the incident had never happened.

Lee shrugged, walked over to a nearby rock a few inches up from the river, and in one swift movement, jumped into the icy abyss. After the sunny mornings were over and afternoon remained, the violent and frigid waters of Konoha were not to be disturbed. As if the fact of him being shirtless didn't already redden my face, the thought of him being shirtless _and_ wet sure did. Through the clear waters we saw in fascination as he did a few hand signs and grabbed on to the wall of the river. Something was not right…

"Wait…Lee knows how to use _chakra_ now?" I voiced my thoughts out loud. My face turned to Gai Sensei who looked at his student with pride.

"Yes…it took him a great deal of time to finally achieve this great task, but my prized youthful student can now do a decent amount of ninjutsu as well as genjutsu!" he nearly cried with joy.

I turned back to see Lee sinking even deeper underwater. "How long will he stay like this? He'll drown!"

At this Gai smiled. "Do no underestimate him, he might have blacked out, but that does not mean he stayed in the water for a _short_ period of time. As I recall, he stayed like this for about…half an hour."

Everyone, even Kakashi, stared in disbelief at Lee's plummeting form.

"What do we do now? Just _wait_ the whole damn thirty minutes?" Neji asked in an agitated voice. Everyone else looked like they wanted to ask the same question.

"Oh, not at all my students! You will soon join him! Now, you all know the hand signs, they are not that difficult, so just concentrate your chakra and OFF YOU GO!" Gai yelled as he grabbed each of us and one by one literally _threw_ us into the hypothermic water.

The water bit at my legs and torso as I crashed into the river, I felt like my muscles were ripping apart and every pain receptor in my body screamed. My eye frantically searched for any of my teammates, but all I could make out was the dark figure of Naruto making the same hand signs Lee did and concentrating. As if by instinct I did the same and prayed that I wouldn't drown.

At first, all of us didn't last even a minute underwater, but as time went by we all got the hang of it and stayed longer amounts of time. A solid hour of training had elapsed before my lungs nearly gave out for the umpteenth time that day and needed to breathe fresh air. I swam with all my strength to the top where I could see a few rays of sunlight and resurfaced. Naruto, Neji, Tenten, and Sasuke emerged shortly after I did, but where was _Lee_?

"Oh no…maybe he…" I did not dare say the rest to my other teammates and instead decided to go back down in search of him. _'What if he blacked out again? Maybe he couldn't control his chakra after such a long time of disuse! What if he's **dead**?'_ I attempted to calm my mind first, trying to convince myself that he was fine, but it was futile as I couldn't help but worry for him. While doing a few hand signs I used up what little chakra I had left and sunk further in the cold depths of the unforgiving river. _'Please be okay…'_

At a hapless turn of events, I found myself running more and more out of oxygen. My heart told me to focus on Lee's whereabouts, but my mind screamed at me to _breathe_! The latter soon won and I felt my throat snap in two as I drew water into it. The alien substance was shortly rejected by my lungs as it demanded air and not this repulsive liquid. I gulped down more water, ignorant of the fact that it was not what I needed, and found myself incessantly choking. My sinuses burned as I breathed the cold water through my nose and my muscles contracted to the excessive pressure I placed on them as I began to swim to the surface too little too late. Despite my best efforts, when I realized I was done for, I slowly succumbed to my watery grave. The last thing I felt was an eerie calming sensation, it was as though tiny pieces of my body were shutting down one by one, by one, by one…

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Wow…my third chapter. So there you have it. I decided to leave it here because then I can work on other things coughschool workcough and leave you guys with a little something to think about. Don't worry, I'll update VERY soon and I'll try my best to write quickly for you guys! Ciao!


	4. A Different Kind of Gratitude

Hello alo everybody! I want to thank EVERYONE who reviewed! There is no better way to kick off my Friday right than seeing a BUNCH of reviews on my e-mail! Thank you guys very much. So as always, recommend and enjoy!

**A Different Kind of Gratitude**

For me, there was no longer any border between the surface of the river and its spiteful end. There was only a paralyzed abyss, for I could not breath, could not scream, could not _move_. My eyesight had become nonexistent and my lungs, filled to the brim. I would have completely lost consciousness had I not felt a sudden violent tug at my waist. A strong force lifted me up from my watery hell and seemed to want to take me with it. I lazily accepted, too weak to even _see_ who or _what_ this persistent strength was.

As the force swiftly carried me to the safety of the water's surface I wondered if I would ever know air again. My tired mind had other plans for me; it had finally decided to completely shut down and take me along with it. The last thing I heard were my own sluggish heartbeats come to a halt as I was pulled into solid ground.

'_Sakura, stay strong! Breathe! I will kill you if you die…'_

Was this my conscious? No, my mind had long forgotten how to communicate with me. What was this angry voice? I had no time to react as I felt a sharp shove on my motionless chest. It was as though the weight of a person was on my chest, repeatedly jumping upon it. My frozen instinct told me to ignore it, and yet the shove came again as strongly as it did the first time. A sturdy pressure held my nose, desperately trying to pinch it. Then came something that seemed to bring color to my blue face; something warm and firm pressed against my open mouth. I gladly accepted it, seeing as it was bringing the element of life back into my body. Again the shove, the pinching, and the warmness came until I sensed something bursting its way out of my lungs, into my throat, and out of my mouth.

My whole body jumped and shivered as the first few breaths of air came back into my neglected lungs. I choked on the vast amounts of water still inside me and threw up the rest. It was as though my mind had received a boost and started up again. Eyesight was the first thing given back to me. Though blurry I could make out a tall figure with black hair. The expression on their face was a mix of worry and exasperation.

"Sakura? Sakura! Can you hear me Sakura?" asked a familiar masculine voice before I felt another presence approach me.

As if on instinct, after my first few breaths were taken, my arms wrapped around this being as I exploded in a fit of hot tears. I felt the presence of my teammates surround me. It didn't matter to me if anyone saw me crying, I had almost _died_.

"Shh, Sakura. It's okay, it's okay. I'm here now." the soothing voice eased my anguish.

After quite sometime of crying and being held I finally looked up to see the face of this seraphic voice, this calming presence, this warm embrace. Sasuke's onyx eyes met my own.

"S-S-Sasuke?" I asked in disbelief. There was no way in _hell _Sasuke was the owner of this soft voice.

"Sakura!" he exclaimed before he wrapped his arms around me protectively. "What the hell were you _thinking_?"

"S-Sasuke?" I repeated his name again, still in shock that he was capable of such emotions.

I turned my head around to find Naruto right next to me, the same expression as Sasuke on his face. Neji, Tenten, and our Senseis were also there, their signs of relief obvious. My eyes scanned the group for the ninja I wanted to see the most.

"Wh-Where's Lee?" I stammered. Somehow it felt like my being alive didn't matter if _he_ was still underwater.

Tenten stepped aside to reveal an unconscious Lee behind her.

"Is he okay? What happened to him? How'd he-" I desperately inquired before being cut off by my Sensei.

"Well, as you can all see, a ninja must always know his or _her_ limits lest they do something that will harm or _kill _them." Kakashi calmly stated before turning around and sitting on a rock. "Sakura you can take the day off if you'd like, there really is no point in continuing if you're not in the proper state of mind anyway." he added. His voice might have sounded cold, but I knew that he didn't intend his words to be cruel.

Gai Sensei effortlessly picked up the motionless Lee in one arm, giving the boy a face that meant they were going to have a serious talk when he awakened. "I agree with with you Kakashi, in fact I think the training will suffice for today. I expect all of you to be back here tomorrow, I will also see to it that Lee recovers quickly when I take him back home. That is all." he quickly disappeared in a puff of smoke when he finished, leaving me to torment over my unanswered questions.

"Tenten, why don't you walk Sakura home? I think she could use some comforting after this exercise. Naruto, Sasuke, Neji, you can go home now if you'd like, it's really up to you. Just be here bright and early." Kakashi said before leaving in the same abrupt manner as Gai.

I stared at the remains of the grey smoke Sensei had left behind as if it were the cause of my spitefulness.

"Sakura come on, you have to get out of those wet clothes, you'll get sick if you don't." warned Tenten as she pulled me out of Sasuke's reach and helped me get on my feet.

My weakened legs wobbled and retaliated against the weight of my body as soon as I attempted to walk. Though I could still move my limbs, it didn't mean I could _feel_ them seeing as they were still numb from the tremendous ordeal I had put them through. The fact that my legs and arms were numb was a warning sign of the muscle pain to come in the morning. I nearly gulped at the thought. My arm was given a gentle squeeze before I looked at Tenten.

"You really worried us Sakura! I'm so glad to see you're okay." She told me in her sweet voice while she held my arm to help me walk. I was starting to really like Tenten. She was honest, friendly, and kind, unlike my _other_ ex-best friend who would remain anonymous.

I gave her my most genuine smile and nodded. "I was so scared Tenten, you have NO idea how it felt like! I seriously thought that it was it for me." I confessed. We walked in comfortable silence before curiosity struck me once more. "Tenten, what happened to Lee? Did you guys rescue him as well? Is that why he was knocked out?"

Tenten shook her head in protest. "Sakura, we'll talk about it when you're better. You've put yourself through enough stress for today. Lee is fine, he'll probably be back to his old self tomorrow, just watch." She assured me. I was about to complain again before I realized we had reached my house.

"Your house is really quiet Sakura. Would you like me to keep you company or is your mom home?" my new teammate asked when we entered.

I shrugged before walking to my room. "My mom usually doesn't come home for days because her job requires her to travel a lot, but I don't know mind, I still see her most of the time. I'd be happy if you stayed." I offered and Tenten accepted with a warm smile.

As we entered my room Tenten's eye lit up in awe. "Wow, your room is really cool Sakura."

"Thanks, sorry about the mess though." It was as if someone had turned my room upside down when I turned on the lights. I silently cursed myself for being in a hurry that morning.

"What…_this_? This is NOTHING; in _my _room you can't even see the _floor_! You have to basically _drag _yourself in because all my junk practically reaches your waist!" she quipped before we both giggled.

When we were finally able to control ourselves I decided to scavenge inside my closet for a dry set of clothes. I managed to find some pajamas and handed an extra pair to Tenten who took them with a questioning face.

"You're going to stay over right?" I practically pleaded instead of asked. The thought of being alone in my house at night would scare even _Neji_ with the weird noises it made.

"Uh, sure. Sakura, are you sure you're feeling all right? Do you need anything?"

I looked over at her and raised an eyebrow. "Yeah, why wouldn't I be? I still feel a little dizzy, but other than that I feel fine," I pointed out while peeling off my wet clothes and putting on my warm pajamas, "and do not worry for I will also be _fine_ for tomorrow when we continue our 'youthful' training!" I mimicked Gai's voice, sending us into another fit of laughter.

"You know, all this time I always thought your teacher was really creepy, but he's actually pretty cool. I can see why Lee looks up to him!" I added as I sat down next to Tenten on my bed.

At this I noticed Tenten went completely silent and merely nodded. "Y-Yes, he was always trying to make Sensei proud."

"_Was_? Tenten, I've been meaning to ask you, what exactly _happened_ to him? He's changed so much since I last saw him." I knew better than to abruptly bring up this subject, but I wanted-no-_NEEDED_ to know.

She shook her head softly and looked up at me with dull eyes. "That is…something you will have to ask him yourself, no one except Gai Sensei knows for sure."

"Oh."

That was the end of that topic, and both Tenten and I knew it. Ironically, that sure didn't stop my new friend from bringing Lee's _body _as the new topic.

"So you never TOLD me! What'd you think of _Lee_?" her voice practically rivaled Gai's. She had officially spent too much time with her Sensei.

I felt my eye twitch at the uncomfortable subject. "I thought I TOLD you that I didn't get a GOOD look at him! I only managed to see Neji out of the corner of my eye, unlike YOU! _You_ were probably gawking at them the _whole_ time! Pervert!"

"Wha-? _Me_? I wasn't _gawking_ at them! I merely stole a few glances!" Tenten backed away in defense. "Besides, what could I assume? _Lee_ sure was looking at _you_ the whole time! How _else_ did he know where to find you while you were gagging underwater?" At this point she closed her mouth shut.

"Nah-UH! You were SO looking at them-what….what did you say? Lee didn't save me…Sasuke did. He was the first person I saw when I regained consciousness!" I exclaimed in utter disbelief. "Lee was also unconscious when I saw him! Sasuke MUST'VE rescued him too…didn't he?"

Tenten stared at the floor and bit her lower lip, probably thinking about how she would explain this to me. After a few seconds of silence she looked back up and took a deep breath.

"Lee was the one who saved you, not Sasuke. When we realized you were missing, _none_ of us knew where you were. I'm guessing Lee sensed your chakra and pulled you up himself using what little chakra _he_ had. After we saw him resurface we all tried to get near him, but he acted as though we weren't even there and set you down on dry land. Sensei knew he had over exerted himself on his way back up, but Lee didn't care, he yelled at us to give you room and began to resuscitate you. He gave you his own last conscious breaths before he too passed out from the huge physical exertion. I don't think I have ever seen him as angry or as determined as I did tonight. Shortly after we moved him, Sasuke reached out to you…I guess that's when you opened your eyes."

When she finished I couldn't help but stare back in shock. "Lee…_saved_ me? _He's_ the one who…" a light blush rose to my face at the thought of the kiss of life. My fingers gingerly touched my lips, my mind wanting to forget the moment and yet desperately somehow wishing for it to repeat itself. "Wow…he's really…_brave_."

"There was a time when _you_ were the reason he _was_ brave you know. I think you should thank him tomorrow." Tenten said as she lifted both her arms and stretched herself. "So anyway! I'm _starving_! Screw my diet; you got any chips or cookies and stuff?"

I giggled and motioned her to follow me into my kitchen for some _serious_ gorging. "Why do you always get SO hungry when you swim? How about we make ourselves some nice _nutritional_ chocolate ice-cream sandwiches using cookies instead of bread and dip it in chocolate syrup and peanut butter?"

At this yummy thought Tenten squealed in delight.

'_Yeah…maybe I **will** thank him tomorrow…but for now, I'm gonna eat!'_

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Whoo! Another chapter done! I hope you liked it, (I can't believe I'm doing this instead of my physics homework…my teacher is going to KILL me.) lol Anyway, I will try harder and update as quick as I can to make this story worthy of being read!


	5. Morning Frenzy and Icy River

Hello alo! Thank you all so _much_ for reviewing! It means a lot to me to know that some people really enjoy reading this story. I will try harder to finish my homework on time and hurry home from practice so I can update faster because I enjoy writing for you guys. Well anywho, as always, recommend and enjoy!

**Morning Frenzy and Icy River**

Morning came sooner than Tenten and I would have liked it to come. I felt the sunlight pouring from my window warm my face as I listened to the soft beeping from my alarm clock. It was a rather rude awakening considering those "soft" beeps were the equivalent of a fog horn this early in the morning. I hated mornings, _hated_ them. A sharp shock of pain ran through my body as I turned over in my bed in a vain attempt to ignore the alarm. I stared at my covers in deep thought before I realized _why_ I was so sore. Memories from yesterday's "adventure" flooded back into my mind and I groaned in annoyance. I just HAD to be the hero and try and "rescue" Lee.

"Today…is going to be hell with my sore muscles…" I muttered before burying my head underneath my pillow.

I heard a deep yawn coming from the small mountain of blankets and pillows on the other side of my bed. A tired Tenten with a dazed look upon her face peered out from the covers.

"It's gonna be hell for…what? And turn off that alarm…" she managed to mumble before yawning again and collapsing back into the comfort of my bed.

How a small twin bed had somehow managed to fit two teenage girls last night was beyond me. I opened one lazy eye to look at the time and nearly jumped from my bed.

"T-Tenten, w-wake up! _Wake up_!" my voice trembled in fear as I grabbed the lump that was Tenten and violently shook it. "Tenten, WAKE UP! It's already NINE!"

"Silly…the clock must be upside…down." was the sleepy and random reply I received.

"Tenten, I'm _serious_, now wake up! All of the boys must be training by now! We were supposed to be there by _SIX_!" I all but exploded as I shoved the alarm clock in her face.

As if barely noticing the time her eyes widened in shock. She was so startled she all but strangled herself in the covers when she tried to get out of the bed too quickly.

"Sakura! What _time_ did you set the alarm to go off! Were you even LOOKING when you set it?" Tenten screamed as she grabbed the first thing she saw lying on the floor, put it on, and frantically started getting ready.

"I set it _right_! I-I must've…hit th-the stupid snooze button one too many times th-that's ALL!" I screamed right back at her as I blindly grabbed the nearest piece of clothing I could find. We both scrambled towards my door before Tenten stopped dead in her tracks.

"Tenten! Are you _crazy_! We're going to be even MORE late if we stop!" I hurried her and tried to pull her. To my surprise, Tenten looked deep in thought. I crossed my arms over my chest and waited for an explanation.

"Sakura. I have…an even better idea…let's just say that you were REALLY sore from the night before…and-and I decided to take care of you…because you were alone…" Tenten talked as though she was barely making up the plan. "Then we'll return in the afternoon and say…that you're all…better!" she finished her sentence as though it was the smartest thing she ever said. _I _looked at her like she was insane.

She placed her hand on my shoulder and looked me in the eye. "Sakura, do you _know_ how much trouble we'll be in with Gai Sensei if we show up _late_?" she reasoned.

"Do _you _know how much trouble we'll be in with _Kakashi_ Sensei if we don't show up _at all?_" I challenged.

Tenten gulped at the unbearable thought. I had won the argument and she knew it. Either way, we were screwed.

"So…what now?" I asked while turning around to check if anyone had seen us talking of this blasphemy.

"Now…we run as if our lives depended on it." Tenten answered while briefly stretching her arms before getting in a sprinting position.

We ran…and I could have sworn not even _Lee_ could've caught up to us.

_A few minutes later that fine morning…_

When we finally arrived at our designated place I felt _exhausted_! My whole body shook with each raspy breath taken, my clothes clung to my skin with perspiration, and my face was crimson from the fast running. Tenten wasn't doing too well either. We looked around and spotted a _very _annoyed Kakashi trying to separate a _very _fuming Naruto and Neji who looked like they wanted to kill each other. As for Gai Sensei, Sasuke, and…Lee, well they could easily be seen training in the river. Well…it was more like Gai Sensei training/lecturing an agitated Sasuke in the art of "youth" and Lee watching in pure amusement by the river. Our other Sensei's voice could have easily been heard from my _house_.

"Well, so glad the ladies finally decided to join the men." Kakashi's calm voice interrupted everything that was happening.

All eyes were on us and I felt very uneasy and embarrassed. I fought to keep my voice from deserting me.

"We were um-we're so sorry! It's just that…um-well, we uh-were…late?" I stammered. Kakashi merely nodded. It wasn't an understanding nod; it seemed to me like the kind of short nod someone gave to execute a prisoner. Did he want to hear more? I began to wonder at what kinds of horrible exercise punishments he had in store for us before Naruto's booming voice interrupted my weak explanation.

"Sakura! Why are you wearing Tenten's CLOTHES!" he loudly stated.

Suddenly, all the men were no longer looking at us but at our attire. I finally realized the clothes I had so blindly put on hadn't even been my _own_. I looked over at Tenten and couldn't help but stare and wish to _die_ from embarrassment. It seemed we had both thrown our clothes on the floor the night before and simply grabbed _each others_ garments before we left in frenzy. I mentally cursed myself. _'Why do people always do the stupidest things when they're in a hurry?'_

"What'd you guys DO?" Naruto practically yelled with curiosity. My voice was now nonexistent, my stomach twisted itself.

"I just decided to sleep with Sakura okay!" Tenten finally answered for me. She was obviously satisfied with her explanation, but nearly blushed when she noticed the boys' minds were in the gutter. Even Kakashi Sensei's eye widened (whether it was in amusement or shock I'll never know.) Sasuke and Gai Sensei released a surprised grunt. Naruto looked like was about to cry and Neji opened his mouth but quickly shut it, looking as though he didn't have the audacity to say what all the men were thinking. Lee simply raised an eyebrow.

"You perverts! I slept with Tenten, not _with _her! Just in the same bed!" I finally found my voice but soon wished I had stayed silent as I watched the eyes of the boys grow even _wider_ than they were before. There was a slight pause that could have lasted longer if it weren't for Naruto and Gai suddenly exploding into a fit of tears.

"Sakura! I-I thought! I-I thought…you….and me…and us…ah! Sakura! Please don't go out with Tenten! I thought we HAD something!" Naruto practically screamed in my face as he held me in a death hug. I was _so_ ready to kick him in the face when this was over.

"Tenten! My dear student! Where have I gone WRONG! Was it the manly talks of youth that I gave Neji and Lee that made you feel left out from the group? Tenten, please I want you to know that YOUTH KNOWS NO GENDER! I will accept you as my precious student no matter _who_ you are!" Gai yelled at a confused and blushing Tenten. I think she had it worse than me.

"Naruto would you just SHUT UP? We're not GAY! Tenten just decided to sleep over because I wasn't _feeling_ well! Trust me, I'm STRAIGHT!" I screamed back in the blonde's face before pummeling him into a nearby tree.

After this was said, I found very unexpected reactions from each of my teammates and Sensei. Sasuke and Neji seemed to breathe a sigh of relief, Kakashi's eye blinked repeatedly in confusion, Gai continued to bawl his eyes out in happiness, and Lee…just raised an eyebrow again. Man, did _anything_ get to him now? As for Naruto, he was too beat up to care.

Kakashi Sensei finally regained his cool and cleared his throat. "Well, now that _that's_ been taken cared of let's continue shall we? Sakura, are you ready to try the water exercise again?"

I gulped but knew I had to nod. There was no sense in being afraid. I knew I would never do something stupid like before ever again. As quickly as I could, I changed into my white undershirt (thank _god _I had remembered to wear it) and was mere inches away from jumping into the icy water before Kakashi took a hold of the back of my shirt.

"You're _not_ going alone again, Sasuke has volunteered to teach you how to properly use this technique."

I pouted at my Sensei but I was secretly happy that I wouldn't be doing this alone. My only disappointment was that he hadn't picked _Lee_ instead. I quickly shook my head. _'Am I **that** infatuated with him now? Is it because he's changed so much? NO…maybe I've-'_

"Sakura? Are you ready?" Sasuke smashed my precious thoughts to pieces. He smirked and took off his shirt (probably expecting me to start worshipping it.) I wasn't going to give him that satisfaction, not anymore. I merely gave him a smirk of my own and dove into the water.

'_Ha! Showed HIM!' _

I was in _control_, already doing my hand signs, centering my chakra, holding my breath, and closing my eyes shut….just before I felt a hand touch my face. I slowly opened my eyes to find Sasuke smiling right at me. _Right_…at…_me_. He wasn't smirking, wasn't giving me a cocky grin, just…genuinely _smiling_. If I wasn't so occupied with keeping my chakra flow steady I might have just drowned right then and there. The river around him made his silent smile all the more mysterious, his black hair floating and becoming one with the water's waves. To say that he looked "beautiful" would not do him justice. If it weren't for the fear of water filling my lungs I would have surely gasped. He looked at me a while before letting his right hand cup my face. With his thumb he caressed my lips. His face was mere inches away from mine.

'_What…the hell does he want?'_ I might have been mesmerized, but that in no way meant that I was _stupid_.

Before he even got a chance to lean in for the kiss, I violently pushed him away from me with all the strength one could muster while underwater and quickly swam my way back up. I was sure Sasuke would follow me. Sure enough, when I finally reached the surface and walked towards the edge of the river, he grabbed hold of my wrist with more strength than I think he intended to use. I let a small whimper of pain escape my lips before the pressure on my wrist suddenly disappeared. Startled, I turned around to see Lee's back facing me.

"I do not think Sakura wants you to teach her this lesson anymore…_Sasuke_." Lee's calm voice was a warning in itself. His hand quickly released Sasuke's, but not before sending him one last glare. Sasuke's eyes looked deadly as he scoffed at Lee and walked past him and me with an apathetic look on his face.

'_That's right you **better** walk away…'_ I smirked in triumph. It was often nice to know I was officially OVER him.

Lee turned around and faced me. I would have preferred Sasuke's evil glare compared to what _he _gave me.

"Sakura. Let us go, _I_ will have to teach you this exercise since Sasuke is incompetent." He said no more and took my hand to drag me back into my wet and icy hell.

"Lee…"

I received no response.

"Lee…thank you."

"Sasuke was focusing on something _other_ than the task at hand. I merely relieved him of his duty."

"Lee…that wasn't what I meant…" I didn't know where to begin and where to end. My appreciation and respect towards him had grown tremendously over the short time I spent with him. He wasn't _anything _like other men…he was just…_different_. What had changed him so? I _needed_ to know why I was suddenly so attracted to him-HIM-the boy who at first I hated, who at first I couldn't _stand_. I decided no words would ever express my gratitude and did the next best thing that crossed my mind: I hugged him. His dry green jumpsuit felt warm against my cold wet skin; I heard his heart race against my ear. I realized I could stay like this for hours on end.

"Sakura…please let go of me, it is not proper. If it is about yesterday then you do not need to thank me, you are my teammate and as such I must protect you as though you were Neji or Tenten." Lee said as he returned the hug to be courteous and pulled me away from him.

With that said, he took off his shirt and walked with me into the river until we were both waist deep in water. Even as he grabbed my shoulders and dunked me underwater, even as my body embraced the icy water, even as I did the hand signs and focused, even as my body shook with the change in temperature, I had never felt so bitter and cold as I did then. The water had nothing to do with it. Not a damn thing at all.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

THERE! I finally updated! I did something stupid and updated the wrong story before….so sorry guys! Stupid me. Anywho…yeah. Thanks for reading and I will continue to update sooner regardless of the mountain of homework I have!


	6. Cake Flambe, My Way

Hello 'alo! Thank you guys again for giving me such wonderful reviews! It makes my day a little better knowing that even though I'm dead tired I can always relax and write for you. Oh and SapphireWhiteTigress, I KNOW that I said there would be "cake" in the last chapter, I feel terrible about not doing that chapter right away! But I felt like it would have rushed the relationship between our characters if I automatically wrote that part of the story. It just seemed too soon! Well, here ya go! So as always, enjoy and recommend!

**Cake flambé, my way.**

Most of the practice had gone by in a blur that morning. Between the training, breaks, and listening to Lee point out the faults in my water exercises, I was just about ready to collapse. Even though I knew Lee only wanted me to do well I couldn't help but feel aggressive toward his endless carping. He was worse than my _mom_ when it came to lecturing me on something. I guess that with such a strict sensei like Gai by his side, he would probably turn out to have the same expectations and ways of training.

"Sakura, you _need_ to relax more, I can feel your body wasting oxygen each time you become tense."

I fought the urge to stab him with a kunai. "How can I _relax_ when you're scrutinizing every damn thing I do!"

"There you go again, fighting with me is certainly not going to help you get any better. Just relax." Lee pointed out while calmly mocking me.

I grumbled a few curses to him under breath before attempting the hand signs.

"You are not properly aligning your fingers with your palm-"

"LEE! Can you PLEASE just…" I didn't know what else to yell as I found myself at loss for words. I was tired, hungry, angry, and confused. All I wanted was to go home, take a shower, eat, and sleep. This new Lee was beginning to look like a real _jerk_. Why did he have a way of making me feel so…_discouraged_? My eyes stung with frustrated tears begging to be released.

"All right you guys, training is over for now! Rest up and come back in the afternoon!" Kakashi yelled at us from afar. After dealing with Neji and Naruto with their bickering I could only _imagine_ how tired my sensei must've felt.

A wave of relief came over me as I heard his words. I was glad training was over, at that moment I hoped to never see Lee _again_. Using what little strength I had left, I waded back to the edge of the river and was about to storm off from the idiot when I felt his hand softly grab my shoulder.

"Sakura, allow me to walk you home."

I dared not turn around and face him in the aggravated state I was.

"No thank you." I replied icily before I shrugged his hand off and continued to walk. Again I felt his hand softly touch my arm.

"I am sorry for being…hard on you. It is just that you have so much potential in you and it troubles me to not see you achieve in something. Please allow me to accompany you on your way home."

I finally turned around to face him, but that didn't meant I wasn't still angry at him.

"_Fine_. Do whatever you want, I _don't_ care." I said in the most indifferent voice I could muster.

Lee gave me that new mysterious smile of his and handed me a towel.

"Wha-? Where'd you get _this_?" I asked in confusion as I stared at the warm towel.

"I assumed you would want to do this exercise again so I decided to bring some for when we were done." Lee explained as he ruffled his hair with another towel to dry it. After he was done I noticed I was seeing him with _messy_ hair for the first time in my life. I stifled a giggle. It was cute and almost…sexy.

I twitched at the last thought and regained control of myself. "Th-thank you Lee. That was really…sweet."

He shrugged and put on his shirt (much to my disappointment.) "I just did not want you catching a cold."

The corners of my lips tugged before I gave him a smile. Suddenly, I wasn't angry at him anymore.

We walked out of the training grounds and into the busy village. Everywhere I turned I saw food stands opening for the afternoon business. This was a rather painful reminder to my stomach as I remembered I hadn't eaten a thing since last night with Tenten. I was just thankful that I didn't embarrass myself by having my empty stomach growl in front of my crush.

'_Yes…Lee is my crush…he is my **crush**. I'm not going to be in denial about this…I **like** Lee…simple as that, I'm not going to waste time trying to prove myself wrong…'_

I nodded. At least I was mature about it.

"Sakura…are you…all right from yesterday?"

I quickly glanced at Lee before wondering how to answer.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Thanks to _you_." I again had to mention my gratitude. "Lee I seriously don't know how to thank you…it was a really brave thing that you did, you know, the whole swimming-back-to-get-me thing…"

"Sakura…why…did you decide to go back even when your chakra was depleted? Were you trying to push yourself to see how much you could handle?" Lee stopped walking and looked at me straight in the eye. I gulped, not quite knowing how to handle this question.

"I didn't do it because I wanted to prove myself!" I said in defense. "I-I did it because I thought you were still underwater and somehow ran out of chakra to swim your way back!"

At this Lee chuckled. "Sakura, I can handle a few minutes being submerged in water. I was _fine_."

"Well, _I_ sure as hell wasn't _fine_ when I thought you _drowned_! That's the only reason why I swam to the bottom! You had me worried sick!" I shut my mouth and realized I had just confessed some things that would have been better left unsaid.

Lee acted as though he didn't even _hear_ my heated confession. "Sakura, you _know_ me, I train far too much to let a mere _thirty _minutes drown me!"

"Lee you don't _understand_! I don't care if it was thirty minutes or _five_ minutes, I was _worried_ about you!"

"You do not NEED to worry about me! You never _have_! Why start now?" he raised his voice.

I nearly gasped. This was the first time I had seen him angry. It was startling, it was frightening, it was…_hot_.

"L-Lee…I worry about you not because I _need_ to, it's because I can't _help_ it! You're my friend Lee…I want to protect you the same way you want to protect me." I was _not_ about to lose my temper and make a scene in the middle of a busy street.

At this Lee's stern face turned benign. He shook his head and took my arm in his to complete the rest of my way home. "You need to rest, you do not even know what you are saying."

We arrived at my house in no time at all, what with Lee dragging me half the way. I stood motionless before my door, not wanting to open it and find the house empty. As far as I was concerned, my mother was still away from the village because of a client and wouldn't come back for a few more days. The only reason I knew she had stopped by the house was because the kitchen was now stocked with groceries. I _hated_ being alone, I hated it more than mornings.

"Lee…thank you for walking me home…and also…for rescuing me. I don't know how to thank you." I hid my blushing face from him.

Again the boy shrugged. "You do not need to thank me, I have already told you this."

That settled it; I was going to do something for him. I couldn't _stand_ the thought of not repaying him in some way. "Lee? Can you come by my house a couple hours before training starts? I want to give you something."

Lee gave me a confused look but nodded. "Well…I do not see why not. I shall see you later, take care...Sakura."

I watched him walk away and blend with the thick crowd on my busy street. I couldn't help but wish he had stayed at my house like yesterday. I brushed the thought away and went inside my house. First I went into my kitchen for a drink of water. I wanted to give Lee something _nice_, it seemed mean not do something for him since he had _saved_ me.

"But what do you like Lee?" I could have sworn my question almost reverberated in the empty kitchen.

Now that I had thought about it, what _did_ Lee like? I now realized now that I knew _nothing_ about him except that he was obsessed with "hard work" and "youth." I doubted he was obsessed with even _that_ anymore.

"'_If your cooking skills are so terrible that you have not guessed at what I am cooking then I will tell you that is it spaghetti.'"_

"He likes to cook." I said out loud to myself when I remembered the day he teased me. A maddening blush crept its way to my cheeks when I also realized I had told him I didn't know how to cook.

"I'll show him I _can _cook then."

I really had to stop talking to myself.

After that mental note I decided to look into the food cabinets and fridge while praying there were enough ingredients to bake...a cake. Now that I stopped to think about it, I had no idea what went _in_ a cake, let alone how to _bake_ one. Well, it didn't matter; I often watched cooking shows so I thought the real thing would be just as easy. If I only knew…

My first task was gathering the ingredients and that itself was an ordeal. I broke half the eggs I found in the fridge and was left to clean the slimy slippery mess. The bag of sugar had a small tear across it and was leaving a trail of sweetness wherever I walked. As for the flour bag, I sneezed at the most inopportune moment and had the airy powder all over my face. I dare not mention the fate of the rest of the ingredients I chose. I quickly scanned over the ingredients that had survived my rough handling and smiled with pride.

'_See Sakura, you can do this!'_ I encouraged myself and went to work.

I broke the eggs in half and watched in amusement as they landed on a bowl with some milk and vanilla with a plopping sound. I tossed in the instant cake mix and being cautious not to drop a single grain, I poured some sugar in a cup and added it. Then came the enemy: flour. I quickly grabbed the bag and let the white substance cascade into the bowl.

"There…now what?" I asked myself and the bowl.

Something was missing and I knew it. It was something to blend the ingredients together…a blender? I racked my brain for the name of an appliance I rarely saw my own _mother_ use. I knew you needed it to make pancakes, but somehow I couldn't picture the appliance in my head. Did I need a _whisk_?

"I need a mixer!" I exclaimed in triumph when I remembered the name. I set out to find it. Through the blender, above the toaster, and behind the waffle baker, I finally came across it. After wondering _why_ my mom bought so much kitchen equipment when we never even _used_ it, I placed the whisks on the mixer and cautiously pressed the "low" button. To my surprise, it started working and the cake mix didn't explode all over the kitchen like I expected it to.

'_Ha! I can do it! Lee will be so proud now that I can cook!' _

Was I really _that_ happy of proving my cooking skills to him? I didn't really care; all I wanted from him was his appreciation and maybe, just maybe, the chance to prove that I wasn't totally helpless. I _hated_ it when he made me feel like that. Noticing that my mix was swirling around sluggishly, I pushed the "high" button and finished up my sticky thick batter. Grabbing a baking pan I poured the lumpy substance into it and popped it in the oven. I grabbed hold of the cake mix box and looked at the instructions.

Well that was…odd. The instructions only listed eggs, milk, and butter as the main ingredients. I shrugged.

"I only put a _little_ flour in…maybe it'll look better and puffier!" I said to cheer myself up. I looked at the baking time: 365 degrees for 20-30 minutes. I remembered from somewhere that you dipped a toothpick or fork into the cake to make sure it was well baked; I'd have to try that. I set the oven at exactly 365 degrees and hesitated before setting the time.

'_It says 365 degrees for 30 minutes…what if I baked it at **400** and for a less amount of time? It'll be done by the time Lee gets here! Ha! I'm such a genius!' _

My face was absolutely _beaming_ at this point. I made the degrees button on my oven beep frantically as I pressed it repeatedly to reach 385.

"Now I can take a shower! God knows I need it after Lee's training!" I giggled as I skipped up the stairs to my bathroom. The cake was going to be _delicious_!

I glanced at the clock before I closed the bathroom door. It was already 2:10 P.M. That would give me _just_ enough time to take a shower before Lee came to eat the cake with me and walk me back to the training grounds. I couldn't help but giggle again as I turned on the shower. The thought of seeing Lee happy made me do that nowadays.

When I finally finished my relaxing shower and wrapped myself around a towel, I glanced at the clock again with little interest. It read 2:50 P.M.

'_I only have a few minute before Lee gets here, I'll just have to hurry up.'_

I walked to my room, put on my undergarments, and was barely putting on a shirt when an alien scent interrupted me. I could have sworn the odor was like…_burning bacon_? Shrugging, I finished putting on my red shirt before I caught the smell again. What _was_ it? Now it reeked of charcoal and burning leaves. It _wasn't_….it _couldn't_ be…oh no…

As if to remove all doubt from my greatest fear, my fire alarm went off in a deafening noise.

"The CAKE!" I screamed as I forgot to put on my shorts and made a mad dash towards my kitchen. When I arrived there was a thick cloud of smoke circling around my ceiling. I noticed all the smoke originated from the crackling oven. My mouth and throat suddenly turned dry with the bitter smoke and I started to cough. I began to think the only way I could salvage my oven was to turn it off and open its door. BIG mistake. As soon as I cautiously opened the door the outraged oven burst into flames. The sudden pressure of the flames pushed me away and I landed with a frightened shriek on the floor.

'_What should I do? What should I do? What should I do?'_

It seemed that was all my panicking mind kept repeating to me. I finally regained control of my shaking muscles and grabbed a nearby pot. I sprinted to the back of my house to fill it up with water to hopefully quench the oven's thirst. Throughout all the way, I found myself violently trembling and screaming. As I made my way back to my kitchen, the smoke was so black and thick the only thing I could do was blindly fling the pot of water into the air and hope the liquid would _miraculously_ reach the oven.

All I heard was a grunt of pain through the dark clouds of smoke.

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I'm not very proud of this chapter…I don't know why. I feel like I could have done better. Well, I hoped you enjoyed it and I will try and update quickly! Ciao!


	7. Lessons Better left Forgotten

Hello Alo! I want to thank _everyone_ who has reviewed my story and pointed out what I needed some help in. You have NO idea how much it helped. I have decided to write _during_ classes (that's usually when I feel most inspired.) I'm passing ALL my classes (EVEN PHYSICS!) So now I'm stress free! I'm finding inspiration wherever I look and you guys are a BIG part of it. So with that said and done, thank you. As always, enjoy and recommend stuff to me!

**Lessons Better Left Forgotten**

When the oven finally ended its scorching tantrum, when I had finally stopped shaking long enough to gain control of my body movements, and when the last remnants of black smoke had cleared, I found myself wanting to cry at the unbelievable sight before me. Both Lee and I stared at each other in shock; his face stained with bewilderment, mine, of pure horror. The bucket which was once firmly grasped in my hands was now rolling around aimlessly at Lee's feet; its wet contents spilled all over him. I tried to speak, but my lips betrayed me. Lee held his dripping arms out by his sides to further emphasize what I had done.

"Sakura…what…did you…do." It wasn't even a question.

I gulped and continued to look at him with a pitiful expression on my face. My eyes locked into the oven and the rest of the mutilated kitchen. Everything was fine and spared from the fire, (save for some pots that were covered in soot.) The poor oven wasn't so lucky and neither was Lee.

"I-I…the-cake…and oven…water." I stammered before being cut off by Lee.

"You…WHAT? That horrible burnt mess is _cake_? It looks like you put a bunch of cardboard and fireworks inside the oven!" he exclaimed and pointed an angry finger at the charred remains of the confection I had tried so hard to make for him. "Sakura, what were you _thinking_?" His tone resembled that of a scolding parent belittling their offspring for some foolhardy mistake.

At that instant I realized I felt like a child whenever I did something wrong in front of Lee. I _was_ like a child, a naive child who knew _nothing_ of the world and could never do anything right. My eyes stung with tears as I let the bitter awareness hit me. My body suddenly felt heavy, my legs wanting to buckle under my weight. Suddenly I had never felt so rejected, ashamed, afraid, and vulnerable. Never had anyone made me feel so…so…_useless_. What _was_ it about this new Lee that made me hate him yet want him even more? My knees collided with the floor when I finally gave up. I lowered my head to avoid contact with his berating dark eyes. But I DID NOT want to cry, I figured I _already_ looked weak enough for Lee.

"Sakura." He said my name with sternness.

I dared not look up and face him. A few seconds passed before he realized I was not going to budge from my current position on the ground.

"Sakura." His voice finally softened, but that did not matter to me. I knew that if I looked at him I would break. I heard him give a sigh of surrender before I felt him crouch down beside me. "Sakura…Sakura it is fine, come here." With these gentle words his arms wrapped themselves around me. They were sopping wet, but I still felt warm from his kindness nonetheless. "Sakura please forgive me, I did not mean to sound so harsh! I was just very worried for you when I saw the smoke rising out from your window."

Another realization dawned on me that forced me to look up at him in a questioning gaze. "Lee…how _did_ you get inside my house? The door was _locked_!"

A barely visible blush crept its way to his face, but it was gone as soon as it had come. "Well I-I-when I heard you scream I was not thinking and merely kicked the door open…the hinges broke off from when I did. Ah, Sakura I am so sorry! I promise I will fix it for you!" he bowed his head apologetically and his hug tightened around me to prove his point. I could have sworn I saw a glimpse of the old Lee in the way he apologized and held me. Smiling, I took advantage of this opportunity and also wrapped my arms around him. I found myself thinking of how safe I felt in those strong arms of his.

"So…Sakura…what exactly happened?" It was the abhorred question that I knew was coming.

I tore my gaze away from him and back to the soot covered tile. "I was trying to make a cake."

"For _what_?" Lee's voice had a hint of amusement.

"For…well for _you_." I confessed and closed my eyes shut to brace myself for his castigating reply.

"Sakura…that…was sweet of you, but you do not need to give me anything. Having you acknowledge me is reward enough for saving you."

It seemed my eyes kept switching gazes from the floor to Lee. In this case it was _Lee's_ turn for my attention at his surprising response.

"_Acknowledge_ you? Lee you deserve more than just _acknowledgement_ after what you did!" I choked out, hugging him even more fiercely. I rested my head on his shoulder. "Lee do you feel…like…like I _ignore_ you or something?"

He loosened his embrace on me and helped me get on my feet. "No no, forget it. It is all right Sakura." He mumbled before turning his eyes over to the god forsaken mess behind us. "I will help you clean and then I will fix the door." He looked back at me and a maddening blush suddenly filled his face. He turned his back to me and used his right hand to cover his eyes. "S-S-Sakura! G-Go change! This is SO not proper Sakura, _please_ forgive me for being so disrespectful to you!" Again, I saw a hint of the old Lee with whom I grew to adore.

"Lee? What's the-?" It took me only a couple of seconds to know why he was acting like this. Over the chaos of the burning oven I hadn't had enough time to put on some pants after my shower and was currently in my underwear as a result. _'People…**always** do the stupidest things when they are panicking…'_ I wanted to slap myself right then and there. As I forcibly stretched my shirt to cover myself I sprinted towards my room in utter embarrassment all while yelling "I'M SORRY LEE!"

'_Smooth Sakura…real smooth.'_

Now I was going to have to take a shower again as a result of my foolishness. My skin was covered with black stains from the smoke and I could only imagine how my _hair_ must've looked. I quickly gathered new clothes and ran to the bathroom for another shower before Lee noticed.

"I'm such an idiot! Haven't I've watched ENOUGH scenarios where raising the temperature of the oven to cook faster DOESN'T work? I'm SUCH an idiot!" I kept repeating this to myself as I felt the relieving water hit my body.

I must've stayed in the shower for no more than twenty minutes until I got out and changed into a clean set of clothes (pants included, thank god.) I went to my room to brush my hair and heard several noises coming from downstairs.

'_I should really hurry up to help Lee…but now I'm so embarrassed that I never want to face him again! I am never going to live this down!' _I felt like banging my head against my dresser. A minuscule side of me, however, was almost _glad_ that it had been Lee who heard my scream. I was given the chance to be held by him. That fact alone made me wish the oven caught fire again. Well…maybe not to _that_ extreme anymore. I finished up and debated with myself on whether or not to spray on perfume. My cheeks flushed again, (it seemed that that's all they wanted to do now whenever I thought of the ninja downstairs.) I looked at my small collection and decided to put on a lightly scented perfume that smelled sweet and innocent.

'_I wonder if he'll notice.' _I let out a small giggle and was about to leave my room before I heard a scream coming from the kitchen. I instantly knew that it wasn't Lee. There was _no_ way his voice sounded that feminine. Almost falling down the stairs in a panic, I managed to make my way to the kitchen to find my horrified mother looking at an equally horrified Lee. I think Lee was more afraid of her than she was of him.

"Sakura! Don't come in here! There's a stranger in the house! Go to your room and call for help-!" my mom screamed at me despite my best efforts to calm her.

"Mom! MOM! It's okay mom! He's a friend! Just a friend!" I exclaimed as I grabbed my mother by her shoulders and shook her to knock some sense into her. I looked over at Lee who was still too stunned from the screaming to do much of anything.

It took me _twenty whole minutes _to finally calm her down.

After the fiasco was done and over with I watched this surprising scene in amazement: Lee walked over to my mother, bowed deeply in respect, shook her hand, and introduced himself. If I had money for each man who treated a woman with such respect…I'd be…very poor.

"Please accept my apology Mrs. Haruno, I did not mean to frighten you so. I was coming to accompany your daughter to our afternoon training when I saw that she might have been in trouble. That would explain the condition of the door." He said guiltily.

I'm guessing my mom must have been as amazed as I was to find such a polite boy because she just stood there…gawking much like I had done so many times at him. The color of her cheeks rivaled that of her hair. I was starting to think my awkward stares were genetic.

"Oh, I-uh…it is nice to meet one of Sakura's friends," she finally found her voice, "are you that one boy she's _always_ talking to me about?"

At this she turned to give me a huge grin and a so-_this_-is-your-mystery-boyfriend?-look. I wanted to _kill_ myself for the millionth time that day.

"No, _mom_, this is _Lee_! The other boy was _years_ ago!" I tried to explain all while hiding my blush at the thought of my shameless crush on Sasuke so long ago.

Lee chuckled in embarrassment but looked unaffected by what I had to say.

"Well, either way Sakura, I think it's _sweet_ of you to invite your little friends over! But why is the house such a _mess_!" my mother's tone was the same one Lee had used on me not too long ago.

I felt myself cringe at facing my mother's wrath.

Lee spoke when he realized I was at loss for words. "Sakura was trying to bake…a cake. As you can see, she still needs to learn a few things from cooking, but she's making great progress."

I couldn't tell whether he was being sarcastic or serious.

"Oh, is that what happened? Sakura sweetie, you _know_ I don't like you cooking and messing around when I'm not here! You might get hurt! You're lucky Lee was here, he's already done cleaning most of the mess!" my mom told me while giving me a bone crushing hug that rivaled Gai Sensei's.

True enough, when I scanned the kitchen I noticed most of the burnt batter hand been cleaned out of the oven and the floor was nearly spotless. Wow, Lee _was_ fast.

"Lee honey, why don't you go and take a break or head to practice already? Sakura and I will finish up, there isn't much left to do but clean the rest of the kitchen." She offered as she patted his arm.

Lee shook his head and looked at her straight in the eye. "No Mrs. Haruno, I will now go fix your door and _then_ accompany your daughter _myself_ to meet our sensei." He said in an almost peremptory voice.

My mother merely smiled pleasantly at him. "You're such a gentleman Lee!"

Lee seemed unmoved by her words yet raised an eyebrow to make up for whatever words he left unsaid.

Mom looked at me after smiling like a ditz at Lee. "Anyway Sakura, I'm _exhausted_! I'm going to bed for a few hours and then I'll be leaving again; it seems I've gotten some clients from neighboring villages so I might not be coming back for a few more days." With one last hug, she dragged herself upstairs to the comfort of a warm bed.

Both Lee and I stood motionless, staring at the stairs and probably wondering if my mom had actually been here or if she had been some illusion.

"She seemed…nice." Lee broke the thick silence.

"Sorry about my mom. She's _so_ weird sometimes."

At this Lee knitted his eyebrows in confusion. "Why do you think so? I thought she was rather interesting…and beautiful."

I laughed. "What makes you say _that_?"

"She looks like you for one thing."

My laughter was cut short when I heard this. Had that been a compliment? A pregnant silence filled the air until Lee cleared his throat and broke it once again.

"Sakura, not to sound rude or anything, but we really should hurry if we hope to make it to the training grounds on time."

A furious blush filled my face as I nodded and slowly walked into the kitchen. To Lee it probably looked like I was walking underwater.

As we worked I couldn't help but steal glances at Lee as he lifted my heavy door with ease. I noticed how his strong bandaged hands grasped the hinges and carefully replaced them. I noticed how his biceps would flex with each tool he grabbed. I could see his chest calmly rising and lowering itself with each steady breath he took. I could see how his facial expressions would change intermittently depending on what he was doing. His focused eyes glanced at the newly repaired door until they rested on me.

"Sakura, why do you…always look at me like that?"

His question caught me off guard.

"Like what? I-I wasn't looking at you."

All I got in reply was a short "Hn."

I found that conversing with Lee was like walking on the edge of a dark hole, a hole that would drag you in if you did not quickly fill it up with the right words. Yet the hole could never be satiated nor filled, the more words you threw in the more futile it seemed to be. The hole would always be there, lapping at your feet. I hated it. I hated it more than mornings or being alone. I simply _hated_ it.

"Anyway Sakura, about your mother, I fail to see why she embarrasses you. She seems like a kind woman."

"You don't know _how_ she can get that's why." I said in my defense.

"Mothers are precious women Sakura. You should appreciate her and hear what she has to say."

"I _do_ Lee, it's getting her to be _quiet_ sometimes that's the problem. _You_ have a mom don't you? You should _know_ how they can get!"

The long pause that followed made me want to eat my words. Lee's face suddenly turned pale, his eyes in deep thought, his lips unmoving and thin with chagrin. I was positive he had a mom…._right_?

A smile suddenly graced his once stern lips as he rubbed the back of his head. "Yes…mothers are…very…talkative at times….right." he said nervously.

I blinked, and continued on my business. I knew he was omitting something crucial in his life. It felt like it was something he hadn't dare thought of in his mind. I concluded that maybe I didn't even _want_ to know. It was none of my business anyway. My curiosity said otherwise.

We finished our messy tasks in a solemn state and walked out my house in the same manner. It was a rather chilly afternoon and I soon regretted not having taken a jacket to shelter me from the bitter weather. Tonight was going to be hell if we did those stupid water exercises again. I cringed at the thought of having to make contact with that icy river once more. We probably would be forced to plunge into the water no matter how much we begged or…maybe Kakashi or Gai Sensei would excuse us from doing that and make us do something else instead. I silently prayed it was the latter.

"What is it like?"

"Huh?" I was taken out of my trance-like state with the sudden deep voice of Lee. "What is _what_ like?"

"Having a mother."

There was an awkward moment between us as I thought up a way to pry into Lee's life.

"You don't have one?"

Another pause graced our presence.

"I did once…but she died when she gave birth to me."

"…Oh…" was all I could mumble.

"I answered your question now will you answer mine?"

I shrugged. "I really wouldn't know what to tell you. My mom is just really nice to me. She would walk me to school when I was little, tuck me to bed, make my meals and always made sure to cut off the bread crusts from my sandwiches for lunch." I pointed out and giggled at the warm memories. "Sure we fight sometimes…but that in no way means I don't love her…she's the best! Sometimes I feel really glad and proud to know that she's my mom." I finished and sighed in contentment.

This time Lee did not hesitate in replying.

"It sounds nice…to have a mother that is."

I nodded and unintentionally closed the space between us, walking closer to him. Our shoulders and arms touched. Often the top of our hands would briefly brush against each other as we moved. I wished _desperately_ to clasp his hand. The sounds of our footsteps were the only things we heard from each other after that conversation. But neither of us minded, we were both content to just…walk. There was nothing but silence between our lips. Nothing at all.

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	8. An Awkward Comfort Between Us

Hello 'alo! A TON of thanks to everyone who's been reviewing, it's a great motivator to get the next chapter up and running! I've noticed that some _new_ readers even reviewed some of my _old_ chapters as well and I just want to say: THANKS SO MUCH! Just because the chapter is old doesn't mean the author wouldn't like some feedback on it ya know? It's great to know that people like this story; I didn't think anybody _would_ when I first thought of it actually. Well anyways, as always, enjoy and recommend!

**An Awkward Comfort Between Us**

Training, for once, was boring as the day wore on in a seemingly endless daze. The sun which once shone vividly and kissed our skin had been engulfed by ominous thick grey clouds filled with rain. There was a wintry air around us that rattled the dry leaves on the almost bare trees. Days like these made me wish it were still summer. At least then I didn't feel the dread from fall. My breaths were heavy as a bead a sweat trickled down the side of my face and was promptly wiped away by my hand. Our Senseis had decided upon a humane alternative to the water exercise and allowed us to pick sparring partners instead. I only lamented their choice for a moment, having realized that it meant it would take me longer to master the stupid water technique. The corner of my conscience secretly admitted that I was just bothered because Lee wouldn't be teaching me tonight.

"Hey Sakura! If you keep zoning out like that I'm not going to spar with you anymore!" a pouting Tenten yelled from a few feet away from where I was.

Needless to say, I had picked Tenten as my sparring partner. Both she and I knew we didn't want to be bothered by the guys who probably wouldn't take us seriously anyway. I assumed that since I had picked her, the boys wouldn't have any trouble choosing partners. I was proved wrong since there was only one problem: Naruto had chosen Neji for _his_ partner. This had left a perturbed Sasuke and Lee for each other. My teammate angrily turned down Lee's proposal to fight with a scoff and stomped away from him to practice his punches and jabs on a nearby tree. I _almost_ felt sorry for Sasuke, not only had his "secret" best friend deserted him, but he was left to work with someone he didn't even like.

"What's wrong with _him_?" Tenten whispered to me before we walked off to train.

I didn't answer her; all I wanted to see was how Lee reacted to Sasuke's rude refusal. To my surprise, Lee couldn't have cared less and walked to the tree right next to the broody boy's. Once he adjusted the bandages around his hands, he clenched his hands into fists and began to strike the tree much like Sasuke was doing. It was almost comical to see them acting like this. With each kick or jab Lee seemed to effortlessly put in, Sasuke tried to outmatch it with one of his own all while glaring at him.

This had been going on for _several_ hours since the rest of us had started training.

"Sorry Tenten! I don't know where my mind is!" I yelled my apology back when I realized I had zoned out yet again.

Sadly, I _did_ know where my mind was. It wasn't that Tenten wasn't worth fighting with, (it was quite the opposite really; she had almost slashed me to pieces with several kunai,) it was just that it seemed like my mind wasn't focusing at _all_. One minute I was trying to dodge a razor sharp shuriken thrown at my face and the next I was staring off into the distance. There was no need for an explanation for Tenten, I think she knew what and _where_ my distraction was. My eyes always seemed to wander over to the boys (and over to a green jumpsuit wearing one to be exact.)

Tenten sighed in exasperation and motioned with her hand to come and take a much needed break.

"What's _with_ you today Sakura? You're all out of it." She whispered to me as she handed me a water bottle.

I guzzled the refreshment in seconds, my throat feeling like sandpaper. "I don't know…" I lied.

My friend rolled her eyes at me as she took a sip from her bottle. "You're gawking at you-know-who like he knows the answer to life! I don't know _what_ you see in that guy."

My right eye twitched in annoyance. "You talk as if you hate him! A while ago you said he was a nice person and had a killer body!" I hissed as I pulled slightly on her hair bun to shut her up.

Tenten rubbed her head and shot me an irritated look before it tuned into one of confusion. "Wait…we ARE talking about the same guy…right? Your eyes are glued on Sasuke!"

I felt my eye twitch again as she mentioned the ill-tempered boy's name. _'My faded crush on Sasuke is never going leave my reputation is it?' _

"For _your_ information I _wasn't_ looking at Sasuke, I was looking at-!" At that moment I gasped for having realized I had just told Tenten my deepest secret. I could feel her eyeing me curiously.

"Then you must've-you were looking at…OH!" she said quite surprised. I heard her stifle a giggle.

"What!" I nearly growled.

Tenten gave me a mischievous smile that seemed to know something I didn't. "Nothing. It's just…well…I'm glad you finally like him I guess."

I shifted uncomfortably on the grass. "Why do you say that?" my curiosity always got the better of me.

"I don't know, maybe because…he liked you for such a long time…in the past."

I felt my heart grinding against my chest, pleading not to be ripped to pieces at her last word. "Tenten…d-do you know if-if…he…you know-feels the…same?" I did not want my nascent feelings for him to be crushed so soon.

She shrugged and stared at the damp grass, a hint of sorrow in her eyes. "I honestly wouldn't know Sakura. He's changed too much for me to even know if he feels _anything_ at all. He completely shut us out. The only person who I've noticed he talks to is you…which is why I think that maybe you can help him Sakura." She turned to look at me with a pleading expression.

I turned my head to watch my crush train and noticed a few things. For Lee, nothing existed but the tree in front of him, a tree he continued to strike with pure physical strength long after Sasuke had to use chakra to keep from collapsing. Sure Sasuke had a stronger and larger supply of chakra, but what good did it do him if he wasn't determined like Lee was? Lee's determination and passion rivaled no one's, not even Naruto's. He was kind, warm, friendly, and _nothing_ like Sasuke. At least…he used to be. Whatever made him change made me want to know more about Lee with a gnawing interest.

"You're staring again."

"Oh, shut up Tenten."

"You should tell him you know…"

"…Yeah…" I mumbled in uncertainty.

Confessing my feelings for him was something I wasn't quite ready to do. He was just too…unapproachable. I continued to stare in fascination as Lee punched the defenseless tree time and time again. Suddenly, I saw a glimpse of something that made me choke. Tenten's hand took hold of my arm, trying to pull me away, away from the gruesome scene before me. I sensed that she too had once seen this side of Lee while he trained.

"Sakura, it's better if you turn around. I don't want you seeing this." Tenten persuaded me in vain to look away from him.

I cursed myself for not noticing this sooner. As Lee brutally continued to punch the tree, his knuckles were soon becoming two bloody masses of pulp entangled in wet crimson bandages. I finally turned my head around to spare myself from what I saw next. The tree he had so fiercely been hitting and kicking was stained with tiny specks of red; he continued to strike the tree's bark until he left nothing but a bloody inner layer of it. His heavy breathing gave way to frenetic pants as he quickened the torture. He stopped briefly, his dark eyes tainted with anger glaring at the beaten tree as though it was the source of his weariness and pain. Striking a fighting pose, he continued to punch the tree with an alacrity and strength I had never seen him use. His grunts of pain were muffled by clenched teeth, breathing dictated by his mind. This was too much-I wanted him to stop-I wanted him to-

"Lee, you can stop now! Must I remind you what happened _last_ time you trained like this? Now come everyone, Kakashi must say something!" Gai Sensei's booming voice was heard.

Lee glanced back at his Sensei and gave him a vexed look, but punched the tree one last time with his inhuman force. It made me wonder where he got such strength.

I couldn't take my eyes off Lee's beaten knuckles as he walked toward us (even Sasuke looked at them in disbelief.) The white bandages he always wore tightly wrapped around his arms and hands were now stained with blood. Droplets of the metallic substance fell to the ground, forming tiny puddles by his feet. His face held no expression.

'_Am I the only one who notices he's hurt? Why doesn't anyone say anything or help him? Not even his teammates look concerned!' _

Neji and Tenten refused to look at Lee. Our senseis were busy talking to each other about something. I suddenly felt a brief deep animosity toward his team. How could they be so…_cold_? I prepared to rush toward him before feeling Tenten's hand on my shoulder holding me still. She shook her head in gentle disapproval.

That alone made me keep my distance from Lee for the time being.

"It appears as though there is foul weather afoot my students! We must delay our training for tomorrow, but do not worry, it will soon be another YOUTHFUL day for all of you!"

With that said, training finally ended.

Our Senseis disappeared in a puff of smoke without saying another word to us (probably off to settle another score.) Naruto left saying something about eating ramen for dinner and was followed by a reluctant Neji and Sasuke. Tenten was the last one to leave as she released her hold on me and motioned to go to Lee with her eyes. She waved goodbye to us and vanished in the thick forest.

We were alone. Nothing but crickets could be heard.

"Sakura, are you not going home as well?" Lee asked, piercing the thick night silence.

I felt my lips tremble. My heart was in the pit of my stomach.

"I-uh…yes-NO! Lee _you're_ coming home with me to get those hands treated!"

Lee looked down at his hands and appeared as though he hadn't even _noticed_ they were bleeding. "Huh. Well look at that." He said in amusement. A bitter smile tugged at his lips as he made his way to another tree and took a fighting stance. A surge of panic ran through my mind when I knew he was going to hit it again.

"DON'T!" I shrieked as I ran and got between the tree and Lee. _'People always do the stupidest things when they're not thinking!'_ I mentally scolded myself. _Now_ what was I going to say to him?

"Sakura," Lee's voice was a warning in itself, "get out of the way."

"No…Lee. You're coming home with me so I can take care of your cuts." I said calmly, not wanting to back down.

Lee looked at me with an uninterested face that reminded me of Sasuke's. He clenched his jaw and took a deep breath. I gulped and waited for him to berate me once more.

"_Fine_. I will not be able to get any training done while _you_ are here in any case." He seemed to give up and started to walk away from me in that nonchalant way of his.

I grew confused. "Lee, my house is _this_ way! You're going the _wrong_ way!" I called out to him.

Lee turned around to face me and sighed once again in hopelessness. "We are to go where _I_ live for now. I have more bandages and ointments there you can use, that is, if you _still_ wish to come." The tone he used seemed to mock me.

"YOU BET I WILL!" Growling, I followed him home without saying another word between us.

When we arrived at our destination the sky had turned even more dim and grey. It had made the gloomy atmosphere at the training grounds feel friendly. Sharp cold winds slapped our faces as a warning of the storm to come. I was surprised and elated to find out we finally stopped at some apartments. Numbly and without thought, I followed him up several stairs until I was facing his door. I felt myself gulp as Lee opened the door and waited for me to enter. This had been the first time I had seen where Lee lived. Just thinking about that fact made my face red. Lee cleared his throat as he continued to wait on me with bloody hands. Every move the boy made seemed like a direct attack to discomfit me. I just _knew_ it. Reluctantly, I took my first step inside his apartment.

"So this is where you live?" I asked dumbly not knowing what else to say.

Lee gave me a perfunctory nod and turned on a light switch revealing his living room. It wasn't anything like I imagined or thought it would look like. While it wasn't luxurious, the room appeared…comfortable. The first things I saw were a table, black couch, and black sofa. There was a large glass window revealing a view of other apartments and branches of tall trees. In the corner of the room was a bookshelf stuffed with scrolls and books.

"It's nice Lee." I gave him a warm smile. Sadly, the jerk brushed it off like it was nothing.

"If you say so." He muttered before beginning to leave the room.

"Where do you think _you're_ going? You _said_ I could treat your hands if I came here with you _didn't_ you?" I said in an accusing tone.

"I do not need someone to do such a thing. I am fine."

"Like hell you are!" Without thinking, I grabbed one of Lee's beaten hands with force. "Where's your bathroom?"

Probably afraid that I would break off his hand if he didn't tell me, he pointed a finger to the first door in his hallway. I smirked in triumph. Making sure he wouldn't have a chance to escape, I dragged him into the room first and locked the door. Without even asking where they were, I opened up several cabinets and took out the necessary supplies: cotton balls, a soft towel, rubbing alcohol, and fresh bandages.

"Give me your hand." I ordered.

Lee sighed in defeat, sat by the sink, and did as he was told. I now began the bloody task of removing his old bandages. "You shouldn't train like that." I mumbled after a few minutes of silence.

"Then how will I get stronger?"

"Well your punches certainly won't get any better if you keep hurting your hands like this."

"Sakura…I have _always_ trained like that, it is routine, and it is what I _do_."

"Well, at least _that_ hasn't changed about you."

"I have not changed Sakura, merely grown up, which is something I cannot say for _you_."

I couldn't help but glare at him; I hated it when he was right. I scoffed and kept my thoughts to myself. What had happened to him? The old Lee would have been _ecstatic_ to have me anywhere _near_ where he lived. I gave him another harsh look before separating the bandages from his other hand. His vibrant lips that once zealously spoke of youth, love, and undying protection had become terse and lacked any form of kindness. His eyes which were often welcoming and full of life had now grown listless and detached. What had become of the playful boy I used to know? This, this **man** sitting before me…I knew **nothing** of him. It was like talking to a stranger. That realization struck me like an arrow through my chest.

"This might sting a bit." I warned before dousing his hands in the pungent smelling alcohol. Lee didn't even flinch and stared at his knuckles with a blank expression.

"Thank you Sakura...for taking the time to do this. I am sorry about what I said…I did not mean it."

I shrugged in a way that told him he didn't need to apologize. "You're welcome Lee, I'm glad I could help."

"…You have also grown and changed Sakura, even more than _I_ have."

"More than _you_ I don't think so." I giggled. I gently patted his knuckles with a damp towel and began the tedious task of wrapping new bandages around his wrists and hands. I had to stop and look at his exposed skin. This had also been the first time I had seen a bit of his arms when he wasn't fighting. I continued to stare at his skin with such concentration that it even made Lee look at his own hands.

"Something the matter Sakura?" he asked uncomfortably as he tried to pull his arms away from me in vain.

I shook my head. "No, it's nothing. It's just the first time I've seen…ah nevermind, forget it."

"I can wrap the bandages myself if it makes you uneasy Sakura, I know my skin is not exactly flawless." He hinted at the various scars and burns that were scattered along his hands and arms.

I held his freshly bandaged hand in both of mine and squeezed it lightly. "I don't care if you have scars or not Lee, that doesn't bother me. In fact, they're proof that you work hard." I muttered not wanting to make eye contact with him.

"Oh? But you say I should not push myself so hard."

"Did I say that? Fine, go ahead and kill yourself training then, don't mind me." My voice dripped with sarcasm.

"I only work hard because I wish to become stronger. Nothing in this world comes without hard work."

"That's not necessarily true; some things come to you when you aren't even trying."

"Such as?"

"Love…for one thing." I mumbled under my breath.

"As I said, _nothing_ in life is given to you without you having to suffer first, not even love, the most basic and most needed emotion for anyone."

"That isn't true Lee!"

At this Lee gave me a devilish smile. "It is easy for _you_ to think so! You have Tenten as your sweet significant other, do you not?" he joked. "Or was it _Sasuke-kun_ that your mother mentioned?"

A vein popped in my head as I pinched his still raw wounds to get even. "Tenten is NOT my lover! As for Sasuke, I've sent him off to go find somebody _else_ to worship the ground he walks on."

Lee continued to chuckle despite his grunt of pain from when I pinched him. "Youth knows NO GENDER SAKURA!" he was just about to fall down laughing as he mimicked his Sensei.

"I'm not a lesbian LEE!"

"I find it hard to believe unless you prove it!"

And so I did. With a kiss.

It was short, it was brief, it was…_amazing_. The sensation of having Lee's lips on mine was just…indescribable. I've heard from friends that kisses had distinct flavors: strawberry, wine, grapefruit, the list goes on, but they couldn't have been more wrong. Lee had no flavor; his kiss was sweet enough on its own without having some food to tarnish it. It needed no fruit to enhance his taste. That whole thing about kisses tasting like cream and strawberries-that was a bunch of bull. I dared not to open my lips during the kiss; I kept them and my eyes closed shut to relish the innocent moment. Lee's body stiffened even as my hand caressed his cheek, even as my other grabbed hold of the neck of his jumpsuit to pull him closer, even as I stood on the tips of my feet to have better access to his sugary lips. When I pulled back Lee stared at me with wide eyes full of shock and disbelief.

"Sa-Sak…" he couldn't even completely say my name. All he could do was continue to gawk at me in utter confusion. He took a few steps away from me and knocked over the uncapped bottle of alcohol and box of cotton balls in his shaken state. His mouth was still slightly open, panting. Whether it was because of bewilderment or the lack of oxygen while kissing I'll never know, I guessed that maybe it was both. I restrained myself from wanting to possess those parting lips once more.

"Lee…I…" any and all explanations deserted me.

Lee wouldn't have listened even if I _had_ said something; he only continued to back away from me like I had a disease. He took the back of his right hand and slowly wiped his mouth. His lips began to tremble, his eyes blinking rapidly to process what had happened. Being unaware of his surroundings, his feet tripped over the bathroom rug and sent him landing on his lower back. I don't think he even _felt_ the impact of the hard tile. The smile that was plastered on my face soon faded to nothing as I saw his reaction. I wanted to **die** because of what I had done. My legs gave in and I found myself leaning against the sink for support before my body slid to the ground to meet Lee's penetrating gaze.

All we heard for a few minutes was the sporadic drops of water coming from his faucet.

"Lee…I…" I gathered all my courage to find my voice. "Lee…I…ah…"

"S-Sak-Sakura?"

"Y-yes?"

Another painful silence took place before he spoke again.

"I-I think y-you…y-you…"

"Wh-what?"

"I-I think y-you might have…s-stolen m-my first k-kiss."

At this random confession we both doubled over in a fit of laughter.

"I-I w-wasn't expecting th-that!" I exclaimed between giggles when our hysterical laughter had finally subsided.

"Well…it is the truth Sakura." He chuckled as he attempted to get up with his weak legs only to come crashing back down on the bathroom floor. This of course, sent us through a new fit of laughter.

"Okay…okay….okay…we seriously need to calm down Lee." I urged as I felt my stomach twist in pain from the amusement.

"Yes…agreed…we certainly do." He said as he tried to suppress his laughter. Using more precaution, he finally managed to stand on both feet and walked toward me to give me a hand. The brief contact with his hand sent shivers around my body. His proximity to me was intoxicating. He averted his eyes from mine and unlocked the bathroom door. "Let us go to the living room…I am sure we can talk there."

I silently agreed and followed him. There was not much I could do now but hope for the best and brace for the worst.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


	9. Consequences of My Actions

Agh! There, I finally updated! I'm _so_ sorry if I took too long. With practice, meetings, and homework, it's nearly impossible to find time to write! And that sucks because I get these awesome ideas when I'm in the middle of flagline practice and then I FORGET them as soon as I get home! Anyway, yay! I'm SO happy and flattered that you guys reviewed enough to get me into the 100's mark! Even though I'm tired, you guys make me suck it up and continue this story. So as always, read and recommend!

**Consequences of My Actions**

****

The constant pattering of raindrops against Lee's window could be heard from his living room as we entered it. This sound was almost soothing considering it took us great effort to form words. I sat down on the edge of his black couch; Lee sat on the other end leaving a rather large gap between us. My body shifted uncomfortably as I tried to look at anything but Lee. His head was lowered and his eyes were fixed on the rug, his chin supported by the back of intertwined fingers. I rested my hands on my lap and waited for him to speak, but to no avail. The boy would not speak to ease my nerves. The heavy rain and wind were my only comfort. I knew I would have to speak first and I _hated_ it.

"Lee…I'm…sorry."

His confused eyes shot back up from the ground and met mine for a few seconds. We quickly tore our look from each other in embarrassment. My throat felt like I had dry swallowed a pill as I gathered the will to discuss my actions. I found that talking to Lee had never been as hard as it had been now.

"Lee…I don't know what to say except that…I'm sorry…"

His eyes locked on mine yet again but this time refused to look away. "Why are you _sorry_? It was my fault for teasing you. You were not in the right mind and you simply wanted to prove me wrong. It was on impulse…was it not?"

My face grew red and my eyes seemed to waver with his piercing gaze. "_What_? Lee why do you think I kissed you? I kissed you because I-"

"You did it because I was teasing you and you wanted to prove me wrong. It is _fine_ Sakura…I do not hold it against you."

"Lee no-I didn't do it because of-"

"FORGET IT SAKURA!…Forget it **ever** happened Sakura…please just…forget it…" he said in an almost pleading voice. "I do not wish to hear anymore excuses…not now, not _ever_."

I gasped when I first heard him yell. It had been the first time he had screamed at me in anger. His eyes turned to look at the pouring rain through his window. He ran his long fingers through his hair and then rubbed the edges of his head to ward off a coming headache.

"It is raining." He muttered the obvious before lifting himself off the couch and walking toward his kitchen. "I cannot take you home yet Sakura, lest you risk becoming ill."

"It-it's fine Lee. I-I guess I'll…s-see you to-tomorrow." I stuttered before also getting up and reaching the door.

"Sakura…please do not leave…"

His back was facing me, but I could tell he was dead serious. He opened some cabinets and pulled out a box of what appeared to be hot chocolate and two mugs. I hesitated before turning the doorknob and opening the door. I didn't want to be here…with **him**. I wanted to be alone, alone in my house where my only solace was my anguish and tears. As long as **he** wasn't there to see me cry, I didn't care _where_ I had to go. I felt the freezing rainwater spray my face as soon as I took one step out of his apartment.

"Sakura…please close the door, you will get wet and catch a cold." Lee suddenly whispered into my ear.

Startled from having him so close to me at so rapid a speed, I jumped and nearly slipped on the fresh puddle forming on his doormat. Or at least, I _would_ have slipped, had it not been for Lee's quick reflexes. He just _had_ to rub his stunning machismo in my face by saving me the humiliation of slamming my face into wet concrete. His strong arms around my stomach pulled me back to the comfort of his warm apartment. I was drenched from head to foot from the brief encounter with the rain.

"Did I not tell you that you would get wet?" he teased. An amused smirk crossed his lips as he noted my sopping wet condition.

"Shut up." I growled before shoving him away from me, slamming the door that I had almost walked out of, storming off into his bathroom, and locking myself in to dwell on my stupidity.

'_THAT-THAT… THAT…IDIOT! THAT…JERK!'_ I all but muffled my enraged screams in one of Lee's towels. Aside from Naruto who only made me angry, Lee seemed to be capable of bringing **_both_** the best **_and_** worst of me. I was left to sulk inside his bathroom in private for mere _seconds_ before I heard a soft knock on the door.

"GO AWAY!" I shouted. I felt like a punished teenager locked in their room yelling at their parent.

"Sakura…open _up_."

"NO! I don't want to _talk_ to you right now!"

Yeah…I was _definitely_ acting like a dramatic teenager at this point.

While I grabbed some tissue to wipe my damp face I heard Lee sigh through the door. A light thump on the floor then followed.

"I have left some dry clothes for you to wear outside the door, you really should take a shower to calm down."

"I **AM** CALM!"

"Okay-okay Sakura! I believe you! I will be in the kitchen if you need anything." He muttered before I heard his footsteps retreating back into the hallway and out of my hearing range.

"Annoying little…who does he think he _is_ saving me like that?" I grumbled as I cracked open the door and snatched the neatly folded clothes he had left when I saw the coast was clear.

Actually…a shower _did_ sound nice right about now. Funny how that jerk always seemed to know what I needed.

'_I almost regret kissing that idiot.'_

I knew I was merely thinking out of anger. I, Sakura Haruno, in no way possible, would EVER regret touching his lips. Sighing out of weariness and contentment, I peeled off my drenched clothes and set them to dry by the sink. Being careful to set the water on a comfortable temperature, I hopped into the bathtub and was relieve to feel the hot liquid surround my body. My relaxed state suddenly made my anger wash away as easily as all the dirt and stickiness had.

'_What do you know? A bath **does** calm you down…' _

I would had rather go walking out in the rain than admit _that_ to Lee.

Grasping the soap I created some lather and began to wash away my troubles and my body. I couldn't help but smile knowing Lee often smelled of this soap. It wasn't that the scent was strong; it was merely fresh, _crisp_ even. Even during training he never reeked like Naruto or even Sasuke (but that was probably because he didn't spend half his time rolling around on the dirt punching someone who insulted him.) I then grabbed the shampoo bottle and noted its sweet fragrance. Every product seemed to reflect Lee in some way.

"I should probably apologize to him…and probably _thank_ him as well." I mumbled to myself.

Swirls of steam lazily floated around the water as I made my way out of the tub. I grabbed one of Lee's towels and began to dry myself. Doubts and fears were already clouding my restless mind as to how he would react to me once I stepped foot out of the bathroom. Part of me wanted to desperately grow up and try to explain myself to him once more, the other wanted to stay locked in the bathroom **or** run out of his house. The last two were very tempting to try.

I glanced over at the set of clothes he had given me and began to unfold them to reveal a red shirt and pants.

'_What do you know? The guy **does** have clothes in a color other than green!' _

I put on the pants first and felt relieved that they weren't too baggy from the legs or waist. Though I didn't know _why_ it would be too large around the waist-he had that slender yet muscular body that _women_ went on a diet for and _still_ couldn't get. I found myself in utter embarrassment as I attempted to place the shirt over my head. It seemed the shirt was a bit too small for me; it was about two inches short of reaching my bellybutton despite my best efforts to pull it down. For **once** I thought my chest was too big for a shirt. Did Lee actually still _wear_ this? Letting a sigh of defeat escape my lips, I grabbed my wet clothes and turned the doorknob leading to my fate.

"I was starting to think you were going to lock yourself in the bathroom and not let me shower Sakura." Was the first thing Lee said when I found him waiting outside the door. His arms were crossed with clothes between them, his pose nonchalant, his eyes penetrating me. I couldn't help but feel like he was scrutinizing me. His lips were thin and unmoving, very different from the ones I had so eagerly kissed.

"I _would_ have, but then you _probably_ would have broken this door too when I didn't come out." Was my smug reply as I reminded him of the incident back at my house.

At this Lee quickly cleared his throat to change the subject and looked at my shirt with embarrassment. A light blush stained his cheeks as he turned his head to his right side to avoid any visual contact. I desperately tried to pull down the shirt to hide my stomach.

"You could have told me it did not fit while you were still inside the bathroom Sakura." He said uneasily while running his fingers though his hair.

"Well _sorry_, I thought you said you'd be all the way in the kitchen, I didn't think you'd be standing right in front of the door just _waiting_ for me to need something!"

Lee merely sighed (obviously not wanting to start another fight with me) and pointed at a white door in the long and empty hallway. "My room is there, just open my closet or my drawers and please find something that isn't so.…_revealing_." He muttered before entering the bathroom and closing its door. He had such a way at making me feel so…dejected.

Rolling my eyes, I made my way to the white door and stopped right in front of it. The tips of my fingers touched the cool doorknob and yet I did not wish to turn it. Something about seeing Lee's room for the first time both captivated and frightened me.

'_In this room I will see where he sleeps…' _it seemed the thought of also seeing his _bed_ made my legs weaken. The sudden noise of running water from Lee's shower made me rethink my current position. _'I will have the opportunity to see his room and he won't be there…and yet I'm standing out here like an idiot!' _

Finally letting go of my doubts and fears, I turned the doorknob and pushed the door open. All I could say was that his room was ten times cleaner than mine, mostly because he didn't have as much stuff in it. I took several steps inside and noticed a bed with dark green sheets in the corner of the room, beside the bed was a desk with several books and scrolls scattered about it. I looked at the other side of the room and saw a mirror with a wooden dresser containing several drawers. There was a box next to the dresser that contained a pair of oddly familiar leg weights.

'_I'm surprised he doesn't **shower** with them.'_ I giggled at my thought and walked around his room, trying to process that I was actually _in_ it. My attention turned to a pair of doors that slid open. Assuming that it was his closet I opened it and was proved right. I was met with a medley of neatly hanged shirts and pants, some of which were not at all green to my surprise. My hands instinctively started searching the rest of the attire that his closet offered me. In the far right of the closet there were a few pairs of the green jumpsuit. I smiled, realizing I had grown to like that which had irked me so long ago. Behind his usual attire I came across a few richly colored Chinese style suits that looked much too formal for training. I instantly wondered how handsome he would look in one of them and was already making plans on how to make him wear one if he refused when I asked him. Not finding anything comfortable enough to wear, I made my way to his dresser and opened the drawers.

'_I am not looking for clothes…I feel like I'm looking for something else…but what am I looking for…?' _

It seemed I had no desire to look for a shirt; all I wanted to find now was a clue, a letter, a sign-anything! As long as it was some kind of **proof** that he had changed. Without my realizing it, my hands started to frantically dig through neatly folded shirts and endless boxers in hopes of finding something that explained Lee's reserved attitude. I was so caught up in my search that I almost didn't realize when a brown wrinkled envelope slipped out the mountain of crumpled clothes I had excavated. Startled by the desiccated sound of the paper, I turned around and gently kneeled over to inspect the old packet. Cocking my head in curiosity, I delicately turned it over with the tips of my fingers and let it fall once more. Half of me wanted to rip the envelope open and see what was inside of it, the other half (the one using common sense) wanted to stuff everything back where it was before the running water coming from the other room stopped. As usual, the first half of me won as I slid a finger inside the envelope to open it.

'_What is it Lee? A secret? A diary? A Will? Is it-'_

Suddenly, various photographs fell from the envelope and lay scattered on Lee's glossy hardwood floor. I gasped at the mess I had created but couldn't help but be fascinated by what the pictures contained. The first one I decided to pick up had Lee posing in the middle of a scowling Neji and smiling Tenten. They had probably been twelve at the oldest, considering Gai Sensei towered over them. My first realization was that Lee looked extremely different. He didn't sport his usual green attire; instead he wore a light tan training suit and had his hair supported by his ninja headband. I sat down on the ground and looked at the next picture my hands grasped. This one was of a younger boy who had a striking resemblance to Lee, probably one from when he was still in the ninja academy considering there were many children of the same height next to him. My eyes wildly scanned the rest of the photographs as I caught the image of a little boy. He stood alone, the smallest of shy smiles tugging at his lips. He couldn't have been more than seven or eight years of age. His hair was tied up in a long thick braid, his tangled bangs covering most of his forehead. He was covered from head to foot in dirt and perspiration. I blinked a few times, almost in disbelief over the possible (and likely) identity of the battered boy I saw before me.

'_Is this you Lee?' _I dared not voice my thoughts for fear of being heard over the sound of screeching water.

I dropped the photo and picked up yet another. I noticed that this new picture was badly charred and burnt from the edges. It was almost though it had been saved from the obliteration of a crackling fire. The image was blurred, but I could still make out the faint silhouette of a young woman staring straight back at me. She wore what appeared to be traditional and elegant robes that fell to her small feet. Her loosely held hair revealed she had thick flowing dark locks. Her florid cheeks and lips were visible despite the poor quality of the picture. I all but gasped when I realized the beauty of the woman.

"Who is she?" I asked myself, but noticed that my voice came about in a light whisper. The picture slipped out of my grasp and landed on the floor with a dry crumpling sound. I continued to sit on the ground, my back facing Lee's door, and was about to reach for another photograph before my worse fears became a reality.

"Sakura?"

My blood froze, veins stopped dead in their tracks. I halted my actions and cursed myself for letting my guard down for mere moments. My eyes went against my wishes and turned around to face Lee. I nearly blushed at the sight. Apparently he hadn't _completely_ dried off; small beads of water were still visible on his bare arms and chest. They randomly rolled down with each breath he took. The only article of clothing he wore was a pair of black pants. I could have sworn my heart could play the drums for a heavy metal band.

"Sakura? What are you _doing_? I said to grab _a_ shirt, not my whole _drawers_!" he said with hinted amusement.

Frantically, I grabbed whatever photos I could see and stuffed them under a pile of boxers. I plastered on the fakest smile I could muster and turned around again. "Lee! I'm _so_ sorry! I-ah-I couldn't find a shirt that uh…fit?" My sugary voice was as pitiful as my attempts to hide the pictures and I knew it. I had a feeling that Lee knew as well.

"Sakura…what did you hide?"

'_Damn men and their quick showers!'_

The tone of his voice made me feel like I was being interrogated for a crime. I nearly cringed as he took a few steps toward me and kneeled down to my level. Carefully, his hands trailed along his clutter of clothes until they finally rested upon the pile of underwear in which I had "oh so cleverly" hid the photographs. His eyes rested on mine, wavering for a second, before he returned his gaze to the boxers and lifted the pile to reveal what lay underneath. I held my breath.

"Sakura…were you…looking at these?"

I did not wish to lie. I softly nodded my head without hesitation.

Lee's eyes seemed as though they were reminiscing on something done long ago as he continued to stare at the pictures that lay scattered before us. He picked up the burnt one and held it between his long fingers. His eyes were quickly fixed on me. I gulped under his stolid gaze. I continued to sit on the floor and waited for the berating from Lee. My hands seemed to shake as though they were cold, my lips shut with silence. He opened his mouth and I felt myself flinch to mentally prepare myself for his harsh voice telling me not to go through his belongings.

"You said you wanted to know…who this woman was…did you not?" he asked with a benign tone that seemed the opposite of what I was expecting.

A wave of relief washed over me at the sound of his somewhat kind voice. Not wanting to speak out of pure embarrassment I simply nodded.

"Well…this woman…was my mother." He stated as he pushed several of his clothes away in order to sit next to me. Being careful not to damage the photo, he returned it to its rightful place inside the brown envelope and picked up another picture. "And this…" he said shyly, holding up the photo of the battered boy, "is me."

Looking at Lee with a face that seemed to ask for permission, I gingerly took the picture and held it in my hands. I could only stare in disbelief that such an innocent tiny boy would grow up to be the strong shirtless man sitting right beside me. It took me a full minute to realize I _still_ had a half naked Lee sitting next to me. The tiny drops of water continued to roll down his body as he shifted. His hair was a damp mess. He looked as though he didn't even care nor notice that he was shirtless so I tried to act the same with little success. I tried desperately not to blush at how much he had changed physically from the picture.

"Oh." I said, staring at the picture in obvious awe. I did not know what else to say so I searched my mind for a decent conversation starter. Being the smart person that I was I blurted out the first thing that came to mind.

"I didn't know you looked so cute with long hair Lee!"

The burst of laughter coming from the boy sitting beside me reverberated across the walls of his nearly empty room.

"I _hated_ that braid! I fail to see how girls can stand to have such long hair!"

I fidgeted with the photo, not expecting his reaction.

"Then why did you _have_ a braid if you hated them so much?"

At this Lee ran his fingers through his hair as he now often did when he was frustrated or deep in thought. "It is the custom with boys in my culture. My father would not let me cut my hair until I reached a certain age. I suppose it is when I became an adult considering he allowed me to cut my braid once I graduated from the ninja academy."

"Sooo then…you finally cut your hair when you were like…eleven?"

"Yes, more or less along that age."

I nodded my head slowly, comprehending what he had just told me. In the same careful manner that Lee had treated his mother's picture with, I placed the photo of him inside the envelope.

"Lee...would you ever…"I began my inquiry but stopped in the middle of my sentence to grab his attention.

"Would I ever what Sakura?" Lee asked, his focus solely on me.

"Would you ever let your hair grow again?"

Lee laughed once more, god…what a rare pleasure it was to see him laugh.

"Oh no. I cannot honestly say I liked having that burdensome thing hanging from my head!"

I smiled. It was funny how often he made me happy without even trying.

"But I think you'd look really good with long hair!"

"Yes and I would much prefer you with short hair, but you do not see me asking that of _you_."

I wrapped a hand possessively around my long pink hair. The last time I had cut it had been well over two years ago. Lee himself had had a front row seat to the bold act. I was not exactly ready to part with it again, but for a chance to see _Lee_ with **long** hair…

"I'll cut my hair if you grow _yours_." I compromised.

"I was not proposing a deal Sakura."

"Oh, come on!" I pleaded and pouted like a persistent child asking for a sweet.

"**No**." was his laconic reply as he picked up the rest of the fallen photographs and placed them in the envelope. "Besides, I could not grow it back even if I _wanted_ to do such a thing."

I knitted my eyebrows in confusion. "Why can't you?"

Lee gave me a cynical look as he began to fold the piles of crumpled clothes I had so carelessly thrown.

"I was allowed to cut my hair because I became a man. It has nothing to do with personal preferences, merely custom."

I could only nod like a child, not quite understanding his reasoning but pretending like I did. I quickly started to help him fold his clothes, but avoided his boxers despite my fascination with them. I'd die before Lee added "pervert" to his already full list of horrible qualities that I had. My face flushed whenever I glanced at them, I think Lee had more underwear than _I_ did! The piles were an assortment of deep green, black, and red boxers. Oh, to see Lee in one of those while training…

"Sakura, can you please stop staring at them and just pass them to me?"

Blushing, I grabbed the pile and handed it to Lee who was probably feeling as uncomfortable as I was. He finished folding the rest of the clothes and offered his hand to pick me up. I accepted, but not before he gave a medium sized white shirt.

"This time, try focusing on putting it on rather than looking at pictures," He teased as he grabbed a black shirt for himself, "and I apologize about not wearing a shirt, I forgot you were here. I am usually used to walking around like this in my apartment."

I held back a smile, not wanting him to know that I didn't mind at all, not one _tiny_ bit.

Lee gave me one his mysterious smiles and began to close the door behind him. "I made some hot chocolate for you…and dinner should be ready in a few more minutes…you _will_ join me will you not?"

"Of course Lee! I love your cooking!" I all but beamed.

He chuckled and closed the door. "I am honored that you think so."

I couldn't help but jump on top of his bed and hide my face in his pillows after he was gone. I was filled with an odd mixture of glee and embarrassment over everything that had happened. So what if Lee had caught me snooping through his stuff! Any other guy would have screamed and scolded me, but Lee…Lee was just…such a gentleman about it. I finally knew how those girls in cheesy romance movies felt like…and that feeling was just…indescribable. Quickly changing out of the tight shirt and putting on the white one, I raced out the door and into the kitchen where a mouth-watering aroma greeted me.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO


	10. Breakdowns and Confessions

Whoo! I've had SUCH an awesome time this week! We went to a band competition and my cologuard won FIRST place in our division! Sad thing is, I might have gotten a trophy, but I came back home with a broken heart. Lol Anyway life goes on! I actually enjoy all these exhilarating and dejected feelings, it is great inspiration! I guess that's good news for you and bad news for me no? Oh, and I want to thank EVERYONE who's been reading this story and reviewing, especially those faithful reviewers who always write me something! If it weren't for your guys' wonderful reviews I wouldn't know HOW I could continue writing my chapters. So as always, recommend and enjoy!

**Breakdowns and Silent Confessions **

As I entered the warm kitchen, the inviting smell of chocolate and food filled my senses. Now refreshed, dry, and comfortable, I finally had time to notice just how _famished_ I was. Though his back was facing me, I managed to hold back a laugh when I saw that Lee was wearing a red apron. He didn't notice though, he was too busy stirring something in a pot with a spoon. It was almost funny to think that Lee was better at feminine tasks than me, well _almost_. His slender fingers let go of the spoon and grasped another utensil to stir something else in another pot. I felt my stomach growl at the pleasant smells.

"Sakura, if you would like, we can eat in the living room. I think it is more pleasant than being crammed in this small kitchen." Lee said not even needing to turn around to know I was behind him.

'_How the heck does that guy know where I'm at all the time?'_

Grumbling something resembling my thoughts, I dragged myself into the spacious living room. His huge plump black couch greeted me. I jumped down on it and placed my legs under me. The storm hadn't cleared at _all_. I could still hear and see the rain's violent banging on Lee's window. Not that I was complaining. It gave me more quality time with Lee, and more quality time meant finding out more about him-and finding out more about him meant getting closer to him-and getting closer to him meant-

"Sakura, why must you _always_ zone out like that whenever I am talking to you?" Lee scolded me while he held a mug in front of me.

I quickly accepted the drink in embarrassment.

"S-sorry Lee…I guess it's just a bad habit of mine…" I mumbled as I held the mug in both hands. The hot chocolate's sweet and rich aroma teased my nose as I smelled it. Small pieces of marshmallows floated aimlessly around the drink while I swirled it with a spoon. It soothed my dry throat and lips as I sipped it quietly. Releasing a sigh of content I snuggled into his plushy sofa pillows.

"Enjoying yourself?" Lee asked as he also plopped himself next to me and offered a bowl and chopsticks.

I nodded smugly and took the savory smelling meal. Holding the pair of chopsticks in my fingers and muttering thanks to Lee, I began to dig into what appeared to be steamed rice and vegetables.

"This is so good Lee!" I all but squealed in delight after the first few mouthfuls.

He chuckled and merely twirled his chopsticks around his bowl, only stopping briefly to nibble on what I thought were a few grains of rice. "It is just simple rice and vegetables Sakura, but I thank you nonetheless."

I smiled and took a drink from my hot chocolate. "Why are you always so modest Lee?"

"Because arrogance tends to lead a man to his downfall."

"Can't argue with that." I knew all too well.

"Hm."

"Hey Lee?"

"Hm?"

"Where's your dad? I haven't seen him around the apartment and I was just wondering-"

Before I could finish my sentence a sharp crash of glass interrupted me. It seemed Lee had abruptly dropped his bowl and mug. Both had come crashing down on the floor with a deafening sound that made me jump.

"Lee? Lee, are you okay?"

Lee was not listening to me. He held his both his hands over his eyes, his head lowered to his knees. I watched in horror as his body began to tremble uncontrollably.

"Lee? Lee! What's wrong! Talk to me!" I now began to scream as I also dropped my bowl and rushed to kneel in front of him. My hands frantically took hold of both his hunched shoulders and shook them in an attempt to make him look at me. His breathing turned brief and shallow, his skin turned a sickly pale. It took me a full minute to realize he was beginning to hyperventilate. He started to whimper words which I could not hear nor comprehend.

"Lee! Lee, you have to _calm_ **down**!" I said in an even tone. Screaming at his face wouldn't really help the hyperventilation, and I figured I needed to at least _try_ to sound in control. Having my brain finally kick in, I took both of his hands and raised them to the sides of his head. He would not comply.

"Lee…Lee….**look** at _me_. You **have** to calm down, you're hyperventilating and you need to **start** breathing right."

My attempts to make his eyes meet mine failed and I was left to grab his chin with force so he could raise his head.

"Lee _look_ at me. Breathe like I am…you have to get rid of all the carbon dioxide and **breathe**." I whispered.

His eyes were like glass, filled with tears just waiting to burst. His skin, a powdery white, felt cold against my own. I thought he was going to faint under this pressure. He finally managed to look at me in the eyes, looking as though he barely noticed I was in front of him the whole time. His chest which once rose in frenzy was now coming back to steady, but uneasy, breaths. I let his hands fall to his sides after I made sure he had control of his breathing. A thick silence possessed us, Lee's intermittent breaths being our only solace. Without my mind's permission and out of impulse, I cupped his face in my hands and pulled his head to my chest in a tight embrace. I could feel his tears wetting my shirt.

"Oh, Lee…I'm so…sorry." Was all I could continue to whisper.

All I heard in reply were muffled words against my chest.

"What'd you say Lee?"

"Phs gerf yerf est uf meh."

"What?" I asked in a soothing tone.

By this time something took me by surprise. Lee took hold of both my shoulders and pushed himself away from me.

"I said to take your chest off me! What is the matter with you?"

I could only stare in confusion at his sudden change.

"Lee…Lee are you all right?"

"What? Of course I am, why would I not be?" Lee asked in a dignified state. He quickly got off the couch and looked at the mess on the floor. "Sakura, did you drop this?"

"Lee…you were…crying and nearly having a panic attack right now. I can only _assume_ you weren't all right." I said ignoring his accusation.

"What? I was not!"

I blinked a few times, trying to process all that had happened. Lee appeared to be completely fine now; it was as if his breakdown had never happened. Tears were still scattered on his cheeks yet he looked as though he didn't even feel them trickling down his face.

"Lee…you were crying just now! See for yourself!" I exclaimed as I stood up and wiped some of his tears with my fingers. He was baffled when I showed him that my fingers were wet.

"I-….I-Sakura, oh no, I thought I was over this…." It seemed he was saying this more to himself rather than to me.

"Over what Lee? Tell me!"

He gave me a stern look that warned me to back away if I didn't want to make him angry. "N-nothing…j-just forget it."

"What do you mean '_forget it'_? Here I am, thinking you are going to start foaming at the mouth from a seizure and then you decided to pull yourself together all of a sudden like nothing happened! What the HELL! So you just want me to _forget_-"

"Sakura, **forget** it. It is none of your concern."

"Damn **straight** it is! _Obviously_ I'm going to start to freak out a just _tiny_ bit when a friend can't even _breathe_! So EXCUSE me for worrying about you!" I all but shrieked my tirade. A burning sensation filled my eyes, blurring my vision until all I could see was a watery distorted version of Lee. I blinked several times, letting a familiar wetness touch my cheeks. It seemed I had started to cry. I began to cry, _yes_ cry, and I didn't care if _he_ saw me. That was the last **damn** thing on my mind.

Lee's angry face fell and disappeared at the new sight of me. My small sounds of weeping were silenced by the violent thunder and wind that seemed to want to break his window. It was just as well. I didn't need him listening to my pitiful whimpering and sniffling too.

"Sakura…" his voice was soft, apologetic even. As soon as I saw him take a step towards me I backed away twice as much. "Sakura…please do not…do this…to me."

"Do _what_! **Care** for you? Try in my own foolish ways to help you!" I screamed back. "I only seem to make things _worse_ with anything I say or do around you!"

"You do NOT Sakura! You have been a wonderful friend to me! This…what happened right now-it was not your fault! It is something that happened long ago…I….I…please do not make me tell you." Lee pleaded as he extended his arms toward me in an attempt to hug me.

I viciously slapped his arms away and glared at him. He did not deserve this-not from me of all people, but I did not care. "Lee, _why_ won't you tell me?"

"I-I will not…"

"Lee how can I help you when you don't tell me what's wrong?"

"I-I cannot…"

"Why CAN'T you!?"

"B-because…becau-"

"WHY!?"

"Because I could not endure _you_ also shunning me!" he choked back, trying his hardest to keep in control.

I opened my mouth but quickly shut it, not knowing what to say. My tears themselves dried at the sudden emotion he had shown. Lee looked as though he was going to have a breakdown again, his eyes were closed, and his legs trembled. His hands cupped the sides of his head, not wanting to hear whatever I had to say. He soon fell to his knees on the hard floor. His head was lowered and refused to look up at me. I stood motionless in front of him, having lost my voice.

"Sakura…please…do not ask anymore of me. I do not wish for you to think less of me." He whispered.

I lowered myself and sat in front of him. Then using my index finger I lifted his chin up to face me. Taking a deep breath I braced myself for whatever stupidity was going to come out of my mouth.

"Lee…why do you think I would shun you? There is _nothing_ that you could say to me that would make me think less of you." I soothed.

'_Huh. Something __**smart**__ came out for once.'_

In his current state, Lee appeared before me not as the collected and mature man that he was, but as the nervous teenager I had so mercilessly rejected so long ago. He held an innocent face that begged to be kissed, that _begged_ to be touched, to be _held_.

'_Lee…one way or another…I'll break through your emotional barriers…'_ I knew that much was certain.

He gave me a forlorn smile, one that meant so much and yet said so little. I wanted nothing more than to touch him, embrace him, and_ kiss_ him until the very oxygen in my lungs was nonexistent. I wanted to be the one who whispered sweet words into his ear, the one who he told his secrets to, the one who cooked all his favorite meals even though my cooking probably tasted like burnt rubber. The point was whenever I was around this man it seemed like my very muscles needed to be restrained. If only I would've had these strange illogical feelings back when Lee was younger, it could've…it could've been different. It would have been so much better that way, so much more…_convenient_. Then again…love never made convenience its top priority.

"Sakura…"

I gave Lee my full attention and abandoned my thoughts.

"Sakura…thank you." With that Lee leaned closer to my face and planted a soft kiss on my forehead.

I nearly gasped at the precious act, my face a bright cochineal. "F-for w-what?"

"Just…just for caring-for being a true friend." He mumbled before getting up and dusting himself off. "Now…to clean this mess up!"

Just like that, our moment, our fight, **my** one true chance to get something out of him…was gone and quickly as it had come. The emotional crisis was averted. My tears had long dried up, so had his. We found ourselves in the after effects of a verbal fight. Our throats were raw, our lungs exhausted, our bodies drained of energy from our cries. I quickly helped Lee clear the floor of the broken glass and food. We sat back down on the soft couch when our task was completed. Once again my eyes shifted to different objects around his living room, focusing on anything but the tense boy beside me. My eyes finally managed to lock on his black pants. I stared in awe at the long muscled legs he was surely hiding in that thin article of clothing. Something else struck my curiosity that moment. I suddenly became aware that something on his legs was amiss. It was something that I had seen in his room and that was practically a part of him.

"Lee, you're not wearing your leg weights!" I exclaimed as though I had caught him committing a terrible crime. In Gai Sensei's eyes it might as well _have_ been one.

Lee looked down to inspect the legs of his loose pants and grinned. "Of course I am not wearing them Sakura, I only wear them when I am training!" He chuckled and then added with amusement, "You must think I wear them in my sleep!"

I inwardly laughed at his remark, knowing that it probably wasn't far from the truth. "I thought you were only allowed to take them off to save someone who was 'precious' to you? And here I am thinking you even _showered_ with them." I teased, remembering the first time I had seen him take off the burdensome weights.

Lee continued to smile and placed his hand over his left leg. Looking at his leg in deep thought for a few moments made that vibrant smile of his fade away to nothing. I didn't even need to ask what was on his mind.

"Even though…I find myself being able to get stronger and use heavier weights…Sensei _still_ will not let me wear them for very long. How am I to fight ninja like Gaara if I cannot train properly? I look up to him but…Gai…he…frustrates me at times."

In an effort to cheer him up, I reached over and placed a comforting hand over the one he had on his leg. I squeezed it lightly and gave him my best and most genuine smile. "That's because he cares about you Lee! You're really lucky to have that kind of relationship with your Sensei, mine would much rather read porn than take care of us like that." I joked and earned a light chuckle from Lee. "I know how teachers can get, we all do, but whatever they tell us to do is for our own good! Besides, heavier weights aren't necessarily better, and maybe Gai Sensei knows that better than you do. You just have to train in different and better ways that won't hurt your leg as much! Just keep going at it, you know how women love a guy with perseverance!" With that my resisting hand retreated back into my lap.

At this Lee finally awarded me with a laugh.

"I do not know about the women part, but I will certainly try harder with that positive speech you gave me Sakura!"

"Wha-? Lee what do you _mean_ 'the women part'?! Of _course_ they love that in a guy! Any woman who doesn't love a man who is a hard worker is either crazy or in love with Shikamaru!"

The sound of Lee's laughter warmed my heart once again.

"That may be true for Shikamaru, but you have yet to tell me the name of _any_ woman who finds that quality attractive in a man." He pointed out while making himself more comfortable on the couch.

I did the same and _unintentionally_ huddled closer to him, curling my knees up to my chin. My mind wanted to say something stupid again but I controlled it from dictating my mouth. "Well…I-ah…hmm…name name name…well-I can't think of any at the moment but-"

"See? _See_! That is because there _are_ no women who find a stubborn and hot blooded man attractive!"

"That's so not true. I-I…._I_ find that…um certain quality attractive in you. I mean-not just _you_-but _any_ man with that quality, th-that's not to s-say that I would go out with ANY guy-I'm-I'm just talking about _you_ in general and uh…you get what I'm saying don't you?" I pleaded in embarrassment. People really _did_ do the stupidest things when they were nervous.

"Not a bit Sakura." Lee said. There was no hint in his voice as to whether he was saying that in all seriousness or being sarcastic. "But I always thought you fancied the type of men that _all_ girls seem to want."

"**What**? What _kind_ of men?" I suddenly turned defensive at his remark.

"Well…the kind like…well like Sasuke or Neji. The kind that leaves women breathless with their striking good looks and natural talents."

I scoffed and playfully socked him on the shoulder. "You sound like you've been checking them out or something."

"I am not _you_ Sakura; _I_ do not find people with the same gender as me attractive." He teased and reminded me of my "little" misunderstanding with Tenten.

"HEY! I've already said that I'm NOT GAY! Do I need to _prove_ it to you again?"

'_Oh…my….I think I'm flirting.' _

"No-no! I think what you did was _enough_ proof if anything!" Lee resisted, holding his hands up in mock surrender.

'_Damn…and I was so close to kissing him again…'_

Clearing my throat in satisfaction, I hugged my knees closer to me. I suddenly found myself feeling very cold with the icy storm still thrashing outside Lee's window.

"Oh, I am so sorry Sakura! I am such a terrible host for not doing this!" As if reading my thoughts, Lee ran out the living room in a black blur and returned with two thick blankets. After handing me the smaller of the two he sat back down and also held his knees close to his chin. Anyone seeing us would have thought we looked like children huddled together for warmth.

"Th-thanks Lee." My voice trembled with the temperature.

"M-hm." Was all he said in return, he was too busy wrapping the larger blanket around _both_ of us.

I blinked several times before I let a massive blush color my face. Lee, noticing this, completely stopped his actions.

"I am so sorry Sakura! That was _so_ rude of me! I should have asked you first if you minded if I helped you keep warm. You see, my apartment gets _very_ cold at night-though I completely understand if you want me to keep my distance-after all it is not proper to-"

"Lee…I _don't_ mind. Come on we're friends! Just use the stupid blanket." I brushed his apologies aside and grabbed his shirt to pull him closer to me. Never needing for something to be asked twice, Lee complied and wrapped us in the large warm blanket.

"ANYWAY Lee, I don't know where you would get that impression from me." I said bringing up our topic again.

"Well…it was rather obvious when I first met you. I mean-you looked like the type of woman who only accepted men like Sasuke or Neji to be worth your love."

I couldn't help but snort at his observation. "Yeah…I was pretty stuck up and stupid back then…I'm really sorry I treated you so bad…I was such an ingrate even when you risked your life for me!"

"Do not speak ill of yourself Sakura because that is not so! True, you first appeared to be a bit….shallow, but with youth comes a certain naiveté that everyone soon outgrows."

"Ha…_right_."

"Sakura!" Lee urged, struggling to shift around in the blanket in order to face me. "When people change or grow…sometimes even _they_ do not realize it. But I can honestly say that you have grown a great deal! It is no wonder that even Sasuke is fighting for your attention! I am positive you will be happy together!"

I burst into a fit of laughter at his last words. I hadn't meant to sound mean, it was just _funny_. Lee stared at me in surprise.

"_Sasuke_? Sasuke! My god does EVERYONE still think I like him? I've gotten the _worst_ reputation because of my stupid crush huh?" It was just funny thinking that not even _Lee_ believed I had gotten over him.

Lee tried not to shiver as he fidgeted about the couch. "Well…do you not love him anymore…Sakura?" he asked uneasily.

"NO! Jeeze, I don't know how many times I need to say it! You once said you grew out of 'silly crushes' didn't you? Well, so did I. I'm not that stupid little girl you used to know Lee, I _did_ grow, and now my standards are a little bit higher because of that." I said triumphantly. I knew I was probably _beaming_ at my proud confession.

"Well…I am quite happy for you then Sakura. With that attitude I guarantee that you will find the right man for you!" Lee said with a smile to match my own.

When he said those words I tried to ignore a sudden jerk deep inside my chest.

"Something the matter Sakura? You turned so serious all of the sudden."

I waved my hand around, motioning to him that it was nothing. "Um…Lee?"

"What is it Sakura?"

"Have you…ever thought…of finding the right _girl_ for you?"

Lee chuckled as though I had said something ridiculous and locked his eyes on mine.

"Why the sudden interest?"

"N-no interest…just curious…I-I guess." I hid half my face under my own blanket, trying hard not to be so obvious.

He continued to look at me in such a manner that made me feel like a child. I began to shake and the low temperature had _nothing_ to do with it. Lee sighed before he spoke. "To be honest with you, I do not think I will be able to marry."

I choked back a gasp. Desperately I tried to find the right words. "Wh-why?"

His pensive expression turned into a frown aimed directly at me. "I think it is rather obvious, I do not need to _explain_."

"Yeah, well _explain_ anyway." I challenged.

Lee held up his index finger and pointed at himself. "Sakura…_look_ at me. I am not worthy of any woman's love, or _anyone's_ for that matter."

"Don't say that Lee! It's not true!" I protested.

"Sakura, I am not asking for compliments from you, I am merely being blunt and honest." He said it as though it was a matter of fact.

Anger rose inside of me like a bubble ready to surface to the top to pop. I viciously grabbed him by the neck of his shirt and jerked him towards me. I caressed my cheek against his soft neck, hoping that somehow, someway he got the message on how I felt about him. "You can be worthy of _anyone's_ love Lee! You're passionate, you're kind, you're sweet, you're strong, you're honest, you're brave, you're patient, you're-you're-you're…" I droned in my own words, never being able to fill the empty hole that was Lee. He pulled away and pierced me with his eyes.

"Sakura…just…I do not wish to discuss this with you. It seems whenever we talk about myself I just make you feel miserable!" he half joked. Leaning back against the couch's pillows, he closed his eyes, and sighed.

It took me a good full minute or two to realize he was falling asleep.

I took in a deep breath and released it, deciding it was better to end this topic rather than fight about it. Giving him one last look, I rested my head in the same manner that Lee had his.

"Hey Lee?" I said in a voice lower than a whisper in fear of waking him.

"Hm?" He was not even listening to me; he was already more than half asleep.

"You're an awesome person Lee, you know that?"

"Hm."

"You know what else Lee?"

"Hm…"

"You'll _always_ be worthy of my love."

"…Hm…"

And being satisfied with that hushed confession, I finally closed eyes and slept.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I'm SO sorry if I'm still being a bit…vague…about Lee. I wanted to reveal his reason for changing so badly but decided against it. I thought this because it would fit more in the NEXT chapter. I _swear_ I'll explain more about Lee in the next chapter!


	11. Pills and Rain

Hello alo'! I am SO sorry about not updating sooner! I feel so bad about it! This whole past week has been more hectic than usual with practice, games, and competitions. But now marching season is over and I can relax! No more practices which means more time to write!! Yay!! Oh, I went to a competition in Tucson this weekend, we didn't win first place, but we won other caption awards. I wrote the last bit of this chapter on the bus with VERY little light. (A friend of mine was kind enough to let me borrow her glow stick!) Word of advice: NEVER write on a bumpy bus ride unless you have REALLY nice handwriting. It took me _forever_ just to read what I had written! I might have made this chapter a little bit longer than my past chapters, mostly because I wanted to make up for the long wait. I'm VERY sorry again. I don't think it will happen again though since I won't have any more practices or games. Also, before I forget, THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR THE REVIEWS! They've helped me so much! So anyway…as always…enjoy and recommend!

**Pills and Rain**

The low and sluggish drumming of raindrops roused me from my deep sleep the following morning. I ignored the pattering noise, curled up in a fetal position, and pulled some covers over my head in a vain attempt to drown it. When this didn't work I let out a sleepy growl and buried my face in something…soft. Wondering what it was that felt so pleasant against my cheek, I opened one extremely heavy eyelid to realize I had buried my face in a smooth green pillow. I breathed in its crisp clean scent and it tickled my nose. A dreamy smile reached my lips when the smell reminded me of Lee. Closing my eyes and turning to lie down on my stomach, I prepared for a few more hours of blissful sleep. Odd…the couch wasn't nearly long enough for me to stretch out on….and something else wasn't right. Weird…I now recalled that I didn't fall asleep on a _mattress_ of all things last night. I cracked an eye open yet again and found myself in a different room…in _Lee's_ room…on his **bed**.

"AGH!" I screamed in surprise. My legs uncurled and scrambled under his bed's covers, trying frantically to rid themselves of the soft sheets that were tangled around them. I burst from the bed and nearly fell on the ground as a result from the rash movement. I jumped to my feet, my mind still in a daze from the rude the awakening, my wobbling legs trying to balance me.

'_Did Lee **move** me last night?' _My face flushed at the idea of Lee carrying me like a bride to his room…to his **bed**…to his covers…

I shook my head to rid myself of any impure thoughts that penetrated my mind. My body froze on my _next_ thought.

'_If **I** slept on his bed…then where did **he** sleep?' _

Knowing that I could never be able to forgive myself if I found out Lee had slept on the couch, I made a dash out his bedroom door and ran to his living room.

"Lee I-!" I grew silent when I found his black couch empty. There were no signs that Lee had slept there, not even the blankets he had used to keep us warm were present.

'_Where could you be?'_ I wondered.

As if to answer my question I heard a loud grunt coming from the end of his hallway. I left the living room and crept my way up the long hall, being careful not to make a noise. I stopped in front of a door that seemed to be one emitting the yells. At first I was tempted to knock to be courteous, but immediately opposed the idea when I realized he could be hurt. I clutched the bronze doorknob in both hands and quickly opened the door.

'_Oh my…'_

I'll admit, what I saw was not exactly what I was expecting…but who was I to complain?

"Um…oh hi!" I awkwardly greeted Lee as though I barely saw him, though my eyes said otherwise. They were glued on him…wanting to ravish him.

He had apparently been exercising; a punching bag hung from the ceiling, oscillating back and forth. His shirt was gone and so were his pants, leaving me to torture my imagination as to what else he had under his loose black boxer shorts. Poor Lee, probably feeling like a piece of meat under my gaze, could do nothing but glance around nervously and look for something to hide him. I had the audacity to not tear my eyes from him and see how his chiseled bare chest glistened with sweat as he breathed, how his firm abs were hopelessly visible despite Lee's attempts to hide them with his arms, how the tiny movement of his arms made his muscles tense up and bulge. He took several steps away from me, making me notice his legs when they made a clinking sound. My eyes traveled down to his strong and agile legs and found his heavy weights attached to them. My _own_ legs grew limp as my breaths became shallow and my throat felt dry. I found myself in awe and wondered how a man's anatomy could bring such emotions in a girl. Well…with someone with _Lee's_ physique, it was nearly impossible for any _sane_ girl not to have the same reaction as me. He was a taijutsu specialists, it was almost _expected_ that his body would signify his hard work. I could have sworn I almost licked my lips.

"Sakura…do you…mind?"

Horrified of what I had done, felt, and _thought_, I quickly turned around to face the door. Much to my dismay, I heard Lee walking around the room trying to find his clothes.

'_Oh darn…as I was enjoying him so much without them.' _I lamented.

"I apologize Sakura. Did I…wake you? Usually I try not to be so loud with my morning training but…" I heard Lee start apologizing behind me.

"No no! I'm fine it's just that…I was looking for you when I woke up in your bed and didn't find you next to me-well not ON the bed-just _on_ the couch-and NOT **next** to me just in-agh…forget it." I finally gave up on my explanation, seeing no need to deepen my hole of embarrassment.

I could only hear Lee chuckle at my clumsy words.

"Good morning by the way…" he whispered close to my cheek.

Again I was startled at the boy's inhuman alacrity and nearly punched his face had he not backed away with the same speed. I turned around to face a fully clothed Lee, much to my disappointment.

"Oh…damn…and I really wanted you like that too…" I grumbled under my breath.

"What was that Sakura?"

"I said good morning to you too!" I quickly took his mind off my perverted choice of words.

Lee grabbed a white towel hanging from some training equipment and used it to wipe the perspiration from his left cheek. "Did you sleep well?"

I could only nod my head, seeing as I did not want something stupid to escape my mouth.

"I am glad to hear that Sakura." With that said he smiled warmly at me and then turned to glance at a window in the corner of the training room. It seemed he liked to have a window in _every_ room. The rain, though now receding to a drizzle, showed no signs of fading completely. Drops of it still splattered on the window copiously. He walked toward me until both our faces were inches away from each other. My lips suddenly trembled, my eyes wavered, and I found myself feeling a bit lightheaded. Without realizing it, I had tilted my head up and stood on the tips of my feet-my lips a mere inch away from his-

"Um…excuse me Sakura…I need to open the door, but I cannot really do that if you are standing right in front of it can I?" he asked in a teasing manner.

I blushed furiously at my poor assumption and nearly stumbled as I quickly got out of his way. Lee gave me a look of suppressed amusement and curiosity at my clumsy behavior. He opened his mouth and looked as though he wanted to ask me something but went against it.

"Lee, it-it's still raining-but it's not as heavy today. You know what? I think I can go home right now and-"

"I have made breakfast for you. You will eat and change clothes…I have also washed and dried your clothes from last night. They should still be in the dryer." He said in a voice leaving no room for my opinion _or_ refusal. He took my hand in his and led me into a small room with a washing machine. I followed like a child.

"Lee…seriously, thanks for everything, but I think I can manage to go home now, I don't want to bother you more than I already have-" I managed to blurt out before Lee interrupted me. I don't think he was even listening to a word I said.

"Here." He stated, handing me my clothes. They were still warm from being in the dryer for so long and smelled like fresh detergent. He studied me for a moment, looking at me as though I were an inanimate object, before a small devilish smile crossed his lips.

"What?" I asked uncomfortable. I suddenly felt like there was something wrong with me.

"N-nothing…it is just…it is just the first time I have seen you…like this." He tried not to chuckle and motioned to go to his room. "I will be in the living room…call me if you wish anything." With that he left me to ponder on his words.

'_What the heck did he mean by that?'_ I shook my head and walked into his room, trying to forget what he had said.

I looked at the room before me, blushing at the fact that I had slept in it. The bed however, was a mountain of chaos. Its sheets and blankets lay cluttered and tangled. If Lee ever saw it I was sure he would have thought I had _wrestled_ someone in my sleep to have his bed in such a disorder. I hastily made his bed and stood back to admire my work.

'_I don't even do my **own** bed and yet I just made Lee's.' _I was beaming at this point.

It was weird how liking a person like Lee would ever make me _do_ things, probably just because he made me feel lazy compared to all the stuff he did. It made me feel…_jealous_ maybe? I brushed the thought aside and looked at clean folded clothes.

I blushed.

"Stupid Lee…why does he have to be so nice sometimes?" I asked no one in particular. Just thinking that he had washed my clothes made my lethargy grow.

I took in the fresh smell of laundry detergent as I pulled my red shirt over my head. Once I finished putting on my clothes I walked toward his mirror on his dresser and slapped my hand over my mouth to prevent a horrified shriek.

It was no longer any wonder as to why Lee was stifling his laughter when he had taken a look at me.

My hair was scattered in all directions, stray strands of it fell over my head as I shook it to get rid of the tangles. It honestly looked and _felt_ like a bird's nest. My face heated knowing that _Lee_ had seen me like this. The fact that he hadn't _told_ me what was making him laugh only seemed to aggravate my mortified condition. I frantically brushed my twisted hair with a nearby brush and attempted to make it look decent once more. Satisfied after examining myself in the mirror, I walked with the best dignity upon my face I could muster out of his room.

As I entered his warm kitchen I felt myself lucky when I heard the screeching water of a shower coming from his bathroom. I didn't know _what_ I could say to him if he saw me anytime soon. I glanced at three pots from which steam slowly rose out on top of the stove. A mouth-watering aroma accompanied the steam. Wondering what could smell so heavenly, I lifted the two of the pots' tops and peered inside. Miso soup and rolled omelets greeted me, respectively. I placed the tops back and peeked inside the third pot to see its palatable contents. It was grilled fish.

I nearly squealed in delight.

It had been so long since I had eaten such a traditional and hearty breakfast! I thought back on all the times I had merely grabbed some fruit or had skipped breakfast altogether because of training. Wolfing down a bowl of sweetened cereal didn't exactly count for a nutritious meal either. Close to the stove was a rice cooker that seemed to be off. My stomach growled at all the pleasant smells mingling together.

"I apologize if this does not suit your tastes Sakura. I usually do not cook these kinds of foods." I heard Lee's deep voice behind me. I turned around to see him wearing his usual green jumpsuit. He was standing by his fridge a few feet away from me. His sudden intrusion had not been enough to startle me for once.

"I-I are you kidding Lee! This looks great!" I stammered.

"No need to patronize me." He said dryly as he took out a water bottle from the open fridge.

"I'm not patronizing you! It really does look delicious! I can't tell you the last time someone made _me_ breakfast!" I tried to commend him.

"Hm." was his terse and indifferent reply.

I noticed he quickly took something out of one of the cabinets and walked into the living room. Feeling something at the pit of my stomach, I served myself some of the food and slowly followed him. I found Lee leaning against his large window, letting the coolness of it touch the fingertips of his open hand. He seemed to be deep in thought as he stared at his other hand curled up in a fist. The fist finally relaxed and opened to reveal a small orange container. I heard its contents rattle as he popped open the cap and took out a tiny white round shaped object from it. He opened his mouth, swallowed it, and took a few gulps of water. It took me a few moments to realize that it had been a pill of some kind. My lips were pressed shut as I earnestly tried to keep my silence…but it was all in vain for my hands started to lightly shake, making my dishes softly clink against one another. Lee's eyes quickly shot up to look at me in surprise. This was the first time it seemed I had ever caught _him_ off guard.

"L-Lee? What were you-"

"There you are Sakura! I am elated to hear you had a nice sleep and I really hope you enjoy your breakfast. Sit down with me will you?" He practically chirped.

It wasn't _what_ he said that frightened me; it was the manner in which he spoke it. It was much too happy…too…_cheery_ for my new Lee. I managed to see when he hid the container in one of his pockets as he took my arm and led me to the couch. There was something…wrong…about the way he smiled, something _wrong_ about the way he all too readily greeted me as though he hadn't seen me in years, and something _wrong_ with the way he treated me. Something was wrong with _him_ and he was keeping it from me. I set my food down on the small table as he practically tugged at my arm to sit. I tried desperately to ignore his façade.

"Lee?" I asked quietly. It seemed as though I were talking to another person.

My attempts to talk went unnoticed by him as he continued with his empty babbling.

"Sakura how do you like your rice? I hope it is not too soggy! It _is_ soggy is it not? I think I will make some more just to be sure! Do you like pickles with your breakfast? I do not care much for them, but I have always bought them anyway. Would you like some? I shall go right now and get them so-" he was about to get off the couch until I grabbed his hand and jerked him back down.

"Lee, forget about the pickles! What's wrong?" I asked worriedly. My nerves were on edge. I was starting to miss the reserved and cool Lee with each passing moment.

I earned a weird expression from Lee. He glared at my hand clasped within his as though it were something indecent or improper. His eyes suddenly made me feel…tarnished.

I quickly released his hand as if I were holding on to a piece of hot coal. Looking at my hand with pity and ashamed of the impropriety I had done, I avoided his fixed angry stare.

Lee rebelliously got off the couch and stormed into the kitchen. He came back seconds later with a small dish full of pickles. Loudly slamming the dish on the table, he sat back down. I couldn't help but notice the outline of the small container inside his pant's pocket.

"**Stop**…looking at it." He said with an irritated tone.

I scoffed and crossed my arms over my chest. "As if **_I_** care if you're popping pills like popcorn you druggie."

A blur of emotion flashed through Lee's eyes. I was no longer able to distinguish the pain from the hatred, the confusion from the disgust, the disbelief from the shock. His eyes were a medley of feelings that were distorted and vague. The image disappeared as soon as it had come, it made me wonder if it had been there at all. He then stayed silent as a corpse with an emotionless air about him.

I found myself wanting to eat my words. Never had I felt such a self loathing as I did now.

My fingers fidgeted nervously as I tried to extend my arm to touch his shoulder. Knowing what I wanted to do Lee angrily moved himself away from my grasp and scooted further into the couch.

"**No**." he warned.

"No? No what Lee?" I asked gingerly while attempting to reach for his shoulder one more time.

I was greeted with the same reaction from him as he moved even more away from me to the opposite end of the couch.

"Do not touch me!" he yelled as he wrapped his arms around himself in defense. His back was hunched over, his head meeting his knees.

"Lee…I-I-I'm s-sorry. I-I didn't mean what I-what I said-"

"Like hell you did not Sakura!" he retorted calmly.

I released a sharp gasp when he said this. It had been a week of many firsts and today was the first time I had heard a curse word out of him. I didn't even think he would **know** how to cuss! As I continued to watch him in his helpless pose it made me feel like I was watching a little boy mourning. A sickening stab crept its way through my head and into my chest. I _loathed_ myself for hurting him like this. It was enough to make me want to slap myself. It made me want to _kill_ myself. It made me want to leave him and run of his apartment to dwell on my stupidity. If I had been that naïve little girl I once was I probably _would_ have done just that. No-I would NOT do that, Lee had told me he had grown up-it was about time I did too. I supplicated him with my apologetic face as I inches closer, pulled his arms away from his waist, and tried to raise his head.

"Lee…come on…I'm really sorry about what I said…I didn't mean it at ALL…"

"NO. Sakura…it is…all right I suppose. You are right after all, who _would_ care about what I force into me? Who _would_ care if I jammed pills down my throat, who _would_ care if I…if I…" Lee didn't quite finish his thoughts, though he looked intent on saying the rest of his sentence.

"Don't say those things! You know damn well that everyone cares about you!" I scolded, trying to convince him. I took a well bandaged hand in both of mine and caressed it with my thumbs. The light touch seemed to attenuate his mood.

"You do not know how wrong you are Sakura." He replied bitterly. I felt him trying to retract his hand from my grasp, but I would not allow it. Something inside me wanted to desperately hold on to him.

"Hey…why do you **_always_** sound like that? It's like no matter what anyone says or does you respond with the same indifferent tone in you voice. You hardly ever smile Lee! You sound like someone who is…who is…" I didn't want to end the rest, I didn't want him to hate me more than he already did.

"Depressed?" Lee easily finished for me.

"Y-yeah…y-you could said that." I hesitated to repeat what he had said in such a facile way. _Depressed._ The word felt odd and foreign on my tongue, especially since it was a word describing **Lee** of all people. Yet _he_ had said it with such indifference and seriousness, I almost thought that he was joking.

The man beside me gave me one of his rare dim smiles and reached into his pocket with his unoccupied hand. He pulled out the small orange container filled half-way with the white pills, and held it in front of my eyes. It was almost as if he was enticing me with it. He pulled my hands away from him and replaced them with the container instead. "Sakura…why are you so…curious to know everything about me all of a sudden?" he asked with amusement.

Noticing that his voice held a genuine tone of curiosity I thought it kind to honestly tell him why. "Because you insist on being so mysterious now." I blurted out without thoroughly thinking.

Lee chuckled and let me examine the medication with his full permission. "Well then…I should have started being '_mysterious'_ when I first met you…maybe then you would have loved me as I did so long ago."

I had no way of knowing if he was teasing or not, so I decided not to respond. Saying anything else might have jeopardized my secret feelings for him. Instead I found the medication's boldly printed words much more interesting to see:

**_ESCITALOPRAM_**.

"Um…Lee I can't even _pronounce_ it correctly. What is it?" I asked with a puzzled look.

I could easily sense the reluctance in his voice as he responded. "It is an...antidepressant."

I cautiously rotated the medication around with my fingers, scrutinizing every detail of it. As I lightly shook the container the dry sound of rattling pills could he heard. Questions seem to explode into my mind at that very second. _Was his depression so deep that he had to take them regularly? How long had he been taking them? Who prescribed them to him? When would he stop-would he EVER stop?_ Out of all these endless inquiries one stood out the most in my mind: '_What had caused him to start taking them in the first place?'_

Popping the cap open as Lee had done, I let a lone white pill fall into the palm of my hand. After looking at it for a few minutes I place it back into its container and waited for words to surface between us.

"Why?" I choked.

Lee shrugged in annoyance, acting as though it was a trivial matter. "Well mostly because all the other pills I had taken have either been too strong or too weak. Also, I could not take other certain pills because of my leg medication-then I would have been drugged half the day. They have this _terrible_ bitter taste when you first take them-"

"That's not what I mean Lee! I want to know what happened to make you have to take them!" I exclaimed in frustration.

He looked at me in askance, not knowing (or not _wanting_) to fully trust me with whatever he wanted to say.

"Well?!" I asked impatiently after he did not answer.

Taken back, Lee was already rambling excuses not to talk. "I-I-Sakura may we talk about this matter _later_? Training will begin soon and-"

"Training can wait, _this_ is more important." I interrupted, not caring whether we even made it to training the whole day. "Besides…Kakashi Sensei is too lazy to make us train whenever it's raining, we have _plenty_ of time." I added with a sweet smile.

"Oh? But _Gai_ Sensei makes us train no matter _what_ the weather brings." He responded with a sense of dread in his voice. "Besides," he copied my tone and challenged me, "what if I do not _wish_ to tell you anything?"

I was not about to back down. "Well then I'll-I'll…I'll…STEAL YOUR LEG WEIGHTS! You can't go to training without them can you!?" I mocked triumphantly with a smug smirk.

I grew with chagrin as I heard him chuckle.

"What's so funny? You don't think I'll do it?" I asked menacingly.

My confidence wavered with his reaction.

Lee stopped laughing and looked down to his leg weights. "Oh, I believe you will _try_ to take them away from me Sakura, but you will never be able to even _touch_ me." He rose from the couch and crossed his arms.

"And why do you think _that_?" I growled, already taking a stance to jump on him.

"Not to brag but I do not think you will be able to even _see_ me should I happen to start running." He finally pointed out.

"Oh, but then that's BORING! You know I can't catch you then you cheater!" I whined while giving him my best pout.

Lee raised an eyebrow at my face and smirked, his gloomy attitude temporarily gone. "Even if I bargain to answer whatever you questions you have?" he tempted me.

Knowing that he had finally let his guard down I made a frantic dive for his ankles. Like hell I was going to pass up this opportunity! My hands quickly grasped both his legs in succession.

"Agh! Sakura, I did not mean _now_!" Lee exclaimed in surprise as he tried to keep his balance.

"You _implied_ that you were going to start running when you **stood** up!" I responded complacently.

He looked at me as though I had said something stupid and tried to move his legs in vain.

"All right…if you say so Sakura…now let me _go_. This is most…awkward!"

I ignored his pleading. A mischievous smile crept its way to my face as I got an idea.

"S-Sakura?" Lee voice already contained a trace of fear in it.

"Yes?" My voice was tainted with saccharine. Before he even had a moment to react I tightened my grip on his legs and began to violently shake them as though they were the branches of a tree. Lee's whole body wobbled out of balance before he (while screaming) came crashing down flat on his bottom. Seeing him land in such an unceremonious manner made me double over in laughter. (The fact that he had an adorable shocked expression on his face didn't help me calm down either.)

"Cute." I mumbled as I forced in breaths between my giggles. I hadn't even noticed when I somehow loosened my hold on his legs.

This just _had_ to give the damn jerk an opportunity. Lee _almost_ got away from my grasp as he tried to slowly get up while I was distracted. No such luck. Before he even had one foot up, I quickly pounced on him once more. Our current…position…took away any possibility of escape with my weight on top of his stomach as I straddled it with my legs.

"Oof!" he managed to choke out when he felt the sudden pressure on top of him. His face was a mixture of pain and breathlessness. "Sakura…get…OFF!" he huffed.

"Answer my questions and _maybe_ I'll consider it!" I bartered.

Lee, upon hearing such a proposal, angrily turned his head to the side as he lied flat on his back.

"**No**." He said quietly. It seemed whatever he knew I was going to ask was out of the question.

"All right then…" was my simple reply. I grabbed both his wrists and slammed them on the opposite sides of his head, "Then we'll just _stay_ like this until you feel like sharing."

"Sakura, you cannot seriously expect _me_-**US**-to stay in this awkward position!?"

"Trust me, we _can_ if it'll make you talk." I silenced his shocked voice with the confidence in mine. "Plus, we both know you can easily get out of this hold, but you won't do it out of fear of hurting me can you?" I added teasingly.

'_I don't exactly **mind** staying like this for a long time either way.'_

Realizing that I was right, Lee turned his head back to look straight up at me. He closed his eyes briefly and opened them. I fought to control myself when I saw his enticing lips part from a tired sigh.

"FINE. What is it…that you want to so _desperately_ know about me?" he asked evenly. Vexation was evident in his tone.

"For starters…when did you start taking the pills?" I began.

"A little bit over a year I suppose." He answered emotionlessly. I could tell he didn't like where this was going.

"Why?" I asked again.

"I have already told you Sakura…" he said through clenched teeth.

"I already know that you're…depressed…Lee, what I want to know is _why_ you are!" I explained in frustration. Without realizing it I had tightened my hold on both his wrists. Whether this actually hurt him I didn't know.

"Something…something just happened." He mumbled with uncertainty.

"**What** happened?" I demanded to know.

"My-my…my…father…"

At this I released my death grip on his wrists and gaped in bewilderment.

"Lee...what did he…do?"

"Nothing…just…I do not know. He-he just…it is not important."

"Please tell me Lee! I want to help you!" I beseeched him. I could tell from his face the inner turmoil he had. It was enough to make me want to kill whoever made him like that.

He pierced through my eyes…and scoffed.

"What makes you think that I _desire_ any help?" he asked arrogantly.

I held back the need to slap him. Making him angry at this point would only worsen his condition.

"Lee…whenever people have problems they _always_ need help, _you_ just have trouble accepting it!" I pointed out.

"The last time I _accepted_ help I ended up taking those troublesome pills and not being able to go on missions for _months_ Sakura. I do not need help from _anyone_." He hissed.

"You're such a pompous little as-wait-_who_ helped you?!"

"Who else would _dare_? Gai and Neji of course." He mumbled quietly as though he didn't want me to hear it.

I grew even more confused of the situation. Did both of them know what happened to Lee? "_Why_ did they need to help you? What happened to your dad? What the hell did he do to you?"

Lee pondered for a moment, looking as if he did not wish to continue. "He-he…he-uh died." He said rather abruptly.

Something in his voice was hiding something, but I ignored it for the time being.

"And…" he took a breath as he continued, "I-I grew depressed because of his death-yes _terribly_ depressed-and Sensei j-just s-seemed to notice."

I knew he was trying to cover something the moment he had started to stutter. He turned his face to the side and cleared his throat.

"Are we done? I really do not wish to have you on top of me any longer, it is most…improper." He said as he tried to shift under my body.

The sudden feel of his toned muscles brushing against my legs made me quickly move my body away from him. "Sorry…I must've been pretty heavy huh?" I joked, now silently praying that Lee didn't think I was fat.

"No-no! Compared to my _leg_ _weights_ you are very light!" Lee tried to compliment me.

"That sounded more like a left-handed compliment jerk, but I guess I'll take it." I stood up and extended my hand to help Lee up as well. "I'm sorry about your father."

At this Lee's lips trembled for a mere second before being controlled. "Y-yes. It is all right."

I sat back down on the couch and took one of the bowls with food. "Aren't you going to eat?" I asked as I took a mouthful of steamy rice.

Lee shrugged and sat down beside me. "I usually do not like to eat breakfast."

"You usually don't like to eat _at all_." I teased as I took a pickle with my chopsticks and munched on it.

He gave me an angry glance and took one of my bowls from the table. "Sakura…I am wondering…" he mumbled before taking a tiny sip of miso soup.

"About what?"

"About how we will explain to our teammates what happened…you know-the whole concept of you sleeping in my apartment." A small blush stained his cheeks though he tried to hide it.

"Oh that. Well, we just won't tell them, they won't even ask." I assured Lee.

Lee set the bowl still filled with soup back on his table and sighed. "They will know though…Gai Sensei and Neji always have a way of finding out about things that I do not want them to know. What is your excuse if Kakashi Sense or your teammates find out?" he asked.

I stopped eating long enough to come up with a "brilliant" answer. "Probably that I slept with you and that we're lovers now-I mean-that's what they're going to think _ANYWAY_ so-"

"SAKURA!" Lee exploded in a fit of embarrassment. "You would not DARE!"

I smirked and ate a lump of rice. "Well, _you're_ the one who wanted to know. Listen-don't freak out. They'll never know as long as we keep our mouths _shut_!"

"I hope you are right." He said worriedly.

"Oh, shut up and eat some fish."

And with those warm words we finished our breakfast and walked outside the door where the rain had reduced to tiny random drops of water. I would never tell Lee, but I was just as anxious and worried as he was for the training to come. Brushing the negative feelings aside, I grabbed a surprised Lee's arm and started to run across the deep puddles. Kakashi Sensei would never know, nor would Naruto and Sasuke…they weren't that smart.

Something ominous in the back of my head said otherwise.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I apologize again for my _very_ late update. As an apology I hope you guys like cheesiness and lovey dovey things for my next chapter (which I will put up VERY soon.) If not, you can always recommend on what I should do. And as for those of you who are wondering if Sasuke likes Sakura…well…you might want to read when I update again. Ciao!


	12. Bemused Whims

Hello alo' and thank you all so much for all of those who reviewed! It really helps me dish out the next chapter a lot faster! Ugh…practice will start again this week…but at least now I'm _captain_! EEP:D I practically MAKE the practice hours now! I'm so happy! Oh, and before I forget, I have a question to ask all of you guys. Once I'm finished proof reading a new chapter, I need suggestions for what day of the week I should update it in. I feel really bad for posting the new chappies up in random days so I figured you guys can help me out. So if you'd rather be reading a new chapter on a Monday, Wednesday, Friday, Sunday...etc…just let me know! And from what you guys say I'll try my hardest to have a chapter up by then! Okay then, again a _million_ thanks for those reviews you guys! So as always enjoy and…read and recommend!

**Bemused Whims **

The large fresh puddles reached our knees as we ran, the icy water always biting at our skin. The streets and stores were desolate, save for Lee and me sprinting across the town. Any person inside their warm home would have thought they had seen phantoms rushing by had they peered through their window and seen us. The wind pierced through my thin shirt, hitting my chest like knives. My face was numb to the few drops of rain that still stubbornly fell from the grey sky. They struck my face like needles. I looked over at Lee who still seemed to be in shock from when I had taken his hand in mine. Letting go of his hand was something I did not want to do any time soon, I loved the feeling of my fingers intertwined in his. The warmth emitting from our cupped hands was my only comfort from the bitter weather we were facing. A smile that seemed to stretch to the sides of my face was given to Lee who received it with a benign expression.

"Sakura, hold on a moment please." He said as he stopped running. The frigidness in my body all but disappeared as Lee pulled my hand. I soon found myself being held against his chest. "I think…that I have a more potent way…of getting to the training grounds."

"What'd you…have in mind?" I whispered huskily, drunk with his rich clean scent. Oh, god…this is how all men _should_ smell like.

"Well…it is something that I have been meaning to try, but Neji would never let me try it with him." He mumbled with a chuckle.

"What is it?" I asked now confused.

"May I…hold you?" he asked shyly.

Before I could even open my mouth to respond Lee all but exploded into a fit of apologies. "OF COURSE IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO THAT IS PERFECTLY FINE! I DO NOT WISH TO DISRESPECT YOU IN ANY WAY!"

"Lee…**calm** down. I don't mind, but what'd you have in mind? It better be some teleportation jutsu." I half hoped.

He smiled as he placed a hand on my back and motioned for me to lift my legs so he could hold on to them. _Great_…I was going to be carried like a blushing bride…for the **_second_** time.

"Well…you _could_ call it that Sakura. I've trained to the point where I do not even _need_ to use chakra to walk on top of water." He beamed.

I cocked an eyebrow at him. "Then how are you going to get across all the puddles?" I asked.

"My speed has increased dramatically Sakura, so much that I can run on top any body of water _with_ my leg weights attached and _still_ not break the surface tension. I have not even shown _Gai Sensei_ this move that I have been practicing!" he exclaimed with excitement. Taking a sprinting pose he burst out running with such inhuman speed that made me tighten my grip around his neck. I could only see _flashes_ of puddles as he seemingly dashed past them without any effort.

"L-Lee! Th-this…th-this is just you? No chakra?" I asked in amazement.

"No chakra." He repeated with confidence.

"Wait till Gai Sensei sees what you can do now Lee! He'll be so happy that his favorite pupil has-"

"He would probably think that I am putting my muscles through too much stress. Please do not even bother telling him about this ability." He interrupted unhappily.

"…Oh…" was all I could say in return. I decided to drop the subject and delight in burying my icy face into his neck.

"Sakura…your nose is really cold."

"M-hm." I mumbled.

"Would you like to stop at your house for a jacket?" he offered.

I shook my head and looked up at his eyes. "Nah, I'm fine. Look, I'm already wet so why bother?"

"I do not want to be the one responsible if you get sick! Since your mother is not around you are basically asking me to take care of you should something happen." He grumbled.

'_Was that **complaining** I heard from Lee?'_

"I almost hope I _do_ get sick then." I admitted.

"What would make you say that?"

"You said you'd take care of me didn't you?"

At this Lee made an abrupt stop and looked at me with a surprised face.

"You say such odd things now Sakura." Was all he muttered before he released me and set me down on wet grass.

"Why'd you let go?" I whined. I knew that my bratty attitude probably wasn't the best way to win Lee's affection, but I couldn't help it, I _wanted_ him to see the real me. With Kakashi I was always the brown noser and intellectual one. With Naruto: the girl who loved to hate him. With Sasuke: the helpless and pathetic girl who worshipped him. With Lee I felt like I could be…_myself_. I didn't care if that wasn't enough for me, I wanted-**needed** him to know he could be himself around me as well.

"I am sorry Sakura, but since we are so close to the training area I would not like it if my Sensei and teammates saw me running around in this speed with a girl in my arms." He said as he pointed to some nearby bushes.

He was right, behind a few trees and bushes I could already hear Naruto's yelling over someone else's (probably Gai Sensei's.) Whatever I had eaten for breakfast threatened to come out at the thought of dealing with these two overzealous people.

"Damn…don't tell me we're late!" I exclaimed in frustration as Lee and I walked closer to our teammates' voices.

"What do you mean '_we'_? I _told_ you we had to leave for training, but _noo_-you just **had** to keep asking me questions!" Lee scolded me like a parent. Before I could even roll my eyes he gently grabbed my arm and made me quicken my pace. "Why is it that whenever anyone is with you they are late for training?!" he continued.

"Because I'm…so much fun?" I half joked with a grin. Lee only scoffed and dragged me across the damp earth to finally meet our team and teachers.

Naruto and Tenten seemed to be in the middle of a sparring session before they stopped to stare at both of us, their kunai still clutched tightly within their hands. Sasuke and Neji looked like they were having a break as I noticed they were by the river's edge. The moodiest of the boys gaped at our sudden appearance, suspicious evident in his ebony eyes.

"Sakura, why is it that whenever you are with someone you come **late**? Even _I_ was here before you." Kakashi unknowingly repeated the same thing Lee had told me as soon as he saw me. He crossed his arms and waited for a half-baked explanation from me. Gai Sensei, who was standing beside him, looked at Lee curiously.

Both Lee and I immediately lifted our index fingers and pointed at one another.

"It-it was…LEE! It was LEE'S fault this time!" I exploded before Lee could blame _me_ as I continued to point a shaky accusing finger at the shocked green clad ninja next to me. I found myself under the stare of six sets of interested eyes.

"WHA-? **_ME_**? _YOU_ are the one who would not stop-"

"All right, I do not want to hear it my students! MY-how YOUTH makes time seem to transient! Both of you, give me five hundred laps around Konoha!" the livelier of the two Senseis interrupted Lee.

"Uh…Gai…I do not think Sakura can give you that many, Lee maybe can, but not her-" Kakashi Sensei pointed out before being interrupted by the same person.

"Very well then! Lee and I shall run the five hundred laps!"

"But I did not even do any-" Lee protested helplessly before being silenced.

"SIX HUNDRED LAPS!"

"Gai Sen-"

"SEVEN HUNDRED!"

"GAI!"

"EIGHT! We must hurry now Lee! Before the last rays of sunlight eat away our **zest** of training!" Gai Sensei roared before taking hold of the neck of Lee's jumpsuit and dragging him off to run. Both disappeared in a blur of green with traumatic and energetic screams.

I almost felt bad…well…_almost_.

I tried to sneak away behind Naruto with a nervous giggle before my Sensei's only visible eye caught my slight movement.

"Where do you think _you're_ going?" his casual voice was the warning for the punishment to come.

I gulped and played with my hair timidly. "Um…uh-um."

Sensei's eye looked up towards the sky as he released a pensive sigh. "It looks like it's going to rain again…Sakura. You know what would be an _excellent_ way to stop the tardy problem?" he asked gingerly.

My muscles tensed at his tone of voice. "An alarm clock?" I asked innocently.

He pointed at the nearby river. I could see the outline of a smirk through his mask.

"Water exercise. NOW."

"But Kakashi Sen-"

"Or would you rather run laps with Gai?" he offered.

I didn't need to be ordered around twice. By the time he had even _mentioned_ the word '_run'_ I was already stripping down and jumping into the arctic river.

'_I don't think Lee has it worse than me…but at least I'm not the one running!'_ I snickered in the back of my mind as I was submerged in water. I could only wonder at what Lee was doing. Quickly making the necessary hand seals, I managed to hold my breath and control it long enough for about thirty minutes before having to resurface for gulps of air. My chest ached, but something told me it wasn't because of the damn water exercise. I rubbed my irritated eyes, trying to get rid of the water, before I felt a presence in front of me. I looked up with my blurry vision and prepared to yell at whoever was interrupting my training.

Standing gallantly on a floating log…was Sasuke. His arms were crossed over his bare chest as he fixed his dark eyes on me. I wanted nothing more than to sink back down until Lee came back. The broody boy sat on the log and continued to stare at me.

"Why were you late?" he asked grimly.

"I overslept." It wasn't a total lie; I HAD slept more than I needed to on Lee's bed. A deep blush stained my pale cold cheeks, making the color all the more obvious to Sasuke though I tried to hide it.

"You're lying. What happened? Lee didn't try anything on you did-"

"Lee would NEVER do anything to me!" I retorted with a higher voice than I intended to use. It seemed that whenever I heard something ill of my crush I grew _very_ protective of him.

"Did he kiss you?" he asked with that same monotonous voice of his. He was irritated and I could sense it. It looked like _he_ was masking _his_ emotions as well.

"NO!" I yelled back.

'_Okay, I was telling the truth there! I don't know **how**, but I **was**!'_

Sasuke studied me and tried to see if I was telling the truth. He scoffed and jumped into the water with me. "I know that I might be sounding really nosy, but I only asked you because I was worried Sakura." He explained with a softer look in his eyes.

"Well don't worry, I'm **_fine_**." I assured uneasily, wanting to be left alone.

"Sakura?" he asked with a _rare_ soft voice.

Surprised by his tone I quickly gave him my full attention. "Y-yeah?"

"I'm sorry…you know-about the other day. I didn't think that I grabbed you that hard." He looked to the other side of the river, avoiding my eyes.

Sasuke had _never_ been known for apologizing, and this was a rare surprise indeed for me. I gave him a warm smile and playfully slapped some water in his face. "Hey, it's all right. Don't even worry about it, you just surprised me that's all."

He gave me one of his rare small smiles and rubbed his eyes from the stinging water. "Do you…do you need help with the exercise? Naruto and I already got it down, I mastered it before _he_ did actually, but we both learned it eventually." He chuckled at the thought of our frustrated blonde teammate.

"Sure Sasuke." I reluctantly accepted.

I quickly tore my eyes away from him and resumed my training. I positioned my hands with the right signs, concentrated, closed my eyes, and-

"You want to know an easier way to master this technique?"

I opened an interested eye at him. "What is it?" I asked curiously.

"Don't close your eyes. Just focus on something under the water or center on something in your mind, it doesn't matter what it is as long as you are purely focused on it." He said as he copied my hand seals and prepared to go down with me. "Let's go underwater…once we concentrate our chakra I want you to look at me and _focus_ _solely_ on me."

I nodded slowly and finished the rest of the hand seals before sinking down the icy water that threatened to give me hyperthermia. I fought back the urge to shut my eyes since the water was hurting them, but I stayed put and placed my attention on the boy who was floating in front of me.

'_Focus…focus…focus'_ no matter how much I repeated this word in my mind I could never really "focus" on Sasuke. But after about thirty minutes my body grew accustomed to the low temperature of the water and my lungs finally relaxed. Sasuke's hair gracefully flowed with the water's current, the reflection of it making his eyes dance vividly. A smirk crossed his pale lips as he looked at me.

I nervously smiled back, feeling ill at ease. Lee wasn't here…why did I miss him? Something was wrong; I didn't want _Sasuke_ to be the one teaching me, I wanted _Lee_ to be in Sasuke's place, I wanted _Lee_ to be smiling at me, I wanted _Lee_ to be the one _caressing_ my _cheek_ with such affection. I wanted _Lee_ to be the-

'_WAIT!_' my conscience screamed at me. My mind and body grew numb, frozen with shock at Sasuke's odd behavior. The only movement I could muster was the trembling of my lower lip. We were both alone…Lee wasn't here to stop him this time.

'_What…why…can't I move?'_ my body would not listen to me; it was captivated by his dashing good looks.

Sasuke took his hand off my face and opened his mouth to form the words of something which I could not decipher. He then pointed at the top of his wrists, implying a watch or time, and pointed up to the surface.

_It was time to go up. _

We both hurriedly resurfaced and took huge swigs of air. Fresh rain was already spraying our faces as we did so.

"What'd you say?!" I asked as soon as I had regained control of my body and voice.

"I said that you did a good job. We must've stayed down there for _at least _forty minutes!" he said proudly at me.

"REALLY!?" I exclaimed happily.

Sasuke nodded and smirked. "Didn't I tell you this was an easier way?"

"Y-yeah, but I didn't expect to master this technique that quickly!" I cried out in glee as I jumped on him and gave him a tight hug. "Thanks Sasuke!" I was beaming at this point.

He continued to smile and swam back to the edge of the river, holding on to my hand throughout all the way. "You're welcome."

"HEY SASUKE! I _TOLD_ YOU THAT _I_ WANTED TO TEACH SAKURA! IT WAS _MY_ IDEA THAT MADE US MASTER THAT STUPID TECHNIQUE!" Naruto's accusing screams could be heard even several yards away from us. Neji pretened to look like he didn't know him and an annoyed Tenten looked like she was counting to ten to calm herself down and not punch the screeching boy. Kakashi Sensei merely sat on a tall tree and continued to read his perverted book, not caring about his student's tantrum.

"TOUGH! You should've told me that BEFORE you started sparring with Neji and Tenten you LOSER!" Sasuke yelled back triumphantly. He held my hand even _after_ we got out of the water and walked back to where they were. Naruto glared at our cupped hands as though it were the source of his problem. It made me quickly pull my hand out of Sasuke's. What was _up_ with him lately?

"BREAK!" was all Kakashi Sensei yelled before being absorbed in his book once more.

Happy to get away from Sasuke, I plopped down next to Tenten under a tree to protect us from the cascading rain.

"Thirsty?" Tenten joked, handing me a water bottle.

"I'm wet, I'm surrounded by water, and I think I just swallowed about _half_ the water in that river…_sure_ I _could_ use some more of that water!" I joked back as I took the bottle and took a drink from it.

We huddled closer for warmth and giggled as Tenten tried to stretch a blanket that she had brought to cover us.

"I feel bad for the guys, they'll have to swallow their pride if _they_ huddle together like this to be warm!" Tenten said. She was looking in amusement at Neji and Sasuke, who were sitting several feet apart and resting under a tree, and Naruto who looked at them with a pleading drenched face.

It was true…Naruto kept looking over at us and then at Sasuke or Neji, repeating that same head movement several times before scooting closer to them. A death glare from both Sasuke and Neji was enough to make him take several steps _back_ from them.

"Aw, I feel bad for Naruto, think we should invite him over Sakura?" Tenten proposed.

I snorted and laughed. "Hell no, he'll try making a move on us or something."

"Ew, perv." She said as she scooted closer to me to make the blanket stretch more.

"At least you don't have to train with him EVERY day."

"Well, I'd rather have _him_ than two teammates who are _always_ serious _all_ the time!"

"Well you always have Gai Sensei and Lee for the amusement don't you? I mean Neji has changed a LOT but-"

"Say Sakura…why _were_ you late? Why was _Lee_ with you?" she asked rather abruptly.

'_Damn…**why** did I have to bring him up!?'_ I mentally scolded myself.

I quickly searched my mind for a proper lie to tell her, but I kept thinking back on the incidents that happened between Lee and me.

Tenten suddenly gasped and held both her hands over her lips, cupping it. "Did he KISS you!?" she whispered in an excited voice only muffled by her hands. Her tone sounded like that of a schoolgirl waiting on the juiciest and newest gossip from her best friend.

"What? _NO_! Why does everyone _think_ that!? I-I…I just…" I trailed off, my mind getting lost on the events of last night.

_Sugary lips._

_Soft._

_Yet firm. _

My face felt unusually warm despite the harsh weather.

"Sakura! Oh…my…SAKURA! YOU DID! YOU CAN'T HIDE IT FROM ME!" Tenten squealed like a little girl on a sugar high in my face. She looked like she was about to faint (that or have a heart attack.)

Suddenly, all the men's eyes were upon us. Even my Sensei's eye traveled away from his book and tried to see what Tenten had meant by her spontaneous screaming.

"Go AWAY! STOP STARING!" she yelled as she glared menacingly and held up a fist to the now scared men. Neji quickly looked away, pretending to not care about our petty conversation, Naruto stuck his tongue out at us and turned around, Kakashi was already lost in his book, but Sasuke was the only one who took the longest to look away from us. He eventually did, after giving me one last suspicious stare.

Tenten's furious face soon turned sweet when she turned to me. "_Then_ what happened? Sakura I _need_ to know!" she whispered excitedly.

"You don't need to _know_ anything!" I hissed back. I had no intention of letting _anyone_ know what had happened between Lee and me.

"Did you like it _that_ much?" Tenten asked with a provocative smile.

My whole _body_ turned febrile at her tone of voice.

"Tenten, shut UP!" I snapped back.

"Tell me and maybe I will!" she whispered, the small space between us becoming nonexistent from her being on edge.

"YES! So what if we did!?" I growled softly out of fear of being heard by the boys.

Tenten's eyes grew wide with shock. "He…he…he-he _kissed_ you!?" she asked slowly, still in apparent surprise.

"Well…not…really…I kind of kissed him first. It was on a whim." I confessed sheepishly.

My friend's right eye twitched because she _still_ couldn't believe the act. "What happened then? Where _were_ you guys? At your house or his? Or were you still training!? Did he like it? How did he react! TELL ME!" she exploded in a fit of inquiries, took hold of both my shoulders, and violently shook me.

"Calm DOWN! You're making everybody stare at us again!" I said in a loud voice. Both of us glared at the nosy boys until they once again turned around and pretended not to see us.

"So how did it happen?" Tenten asked quietly, finally calming down.

"We were…I was just treating his wounds-from last night-the tree remember? He was teasing me about something and it just sort of…_happened_. When we finally pulled away Lee didn't want to talk about it." I said, trying hard not to get lost in last night. I made small circles with my finger on the damp mud and waited for her reply.

"Sakura…did he look happy or surprised or angry?" she asked quietly.

I shook my head solemnly. "He wasn't happy to say the least. He just seemed really shocked about it and then got angry at me, but we made up."

"He…he didn't tell you anything else did he?" Tenten asked curiously, looking at my finger as it traced the dirt and grass.

Again I shook my head, but this time in dishonesty. I didn't want her knowing anything that Lee probably didn't want me to repeat. "But he was so sweet and kind when he made me dinner and hot chocolate…wrapped a blanket around both of us…showed me pictures…made me breakfast." I clamped my mouth shut, fearful that I had already said too much.

"BR-BREAKFAST!?" Tenten muttered in the highest possible voice above a whisper. "Sakura…did you…_sleep_ with him?"

"Not _with_ him you idiot!"

"That's not what I mean you pervert! I meant _in_ his _apartment_!" Tenten remarked as she flicked my forehead.

I could only nod, too embarrassed to say yes. "B-but…it's not what you think! We-we…we d-didn't do anything!" I protested whatever she was probably thinking.

The weapon mistress looked at me quizzically. "Well of _course_ you didn't do anything _else_. Lee isn't that type of guy! Oh, but Sakura, that seems to romantic and sweet!" she said ebulliently.

"Yeah…" was all I could mumble as I thought about the damn kiss.

"So how was the kiss?" she asked giddily, not allowing me a _single_ moment of privacy with my own thoughts.

I stared stupidly at Tenten, not quite knowing how to put my feelings into words. She waited earnestly, the corners of her lips curled into a maudlin smile.

"It was…oh, _god_ Tenten it was _awesome_." I said breathlessly.

She giggled and threw her arms around me in a hug. "He'll never admit it…but he was probably really happy. No matter how hard one tries, they can never _really_ grow out of a childhood crush. It's always there…just…on a different level."

"You think so?" It seemed as though I was asking _myself_ the question and not to Tenten.

"I _know_ so." She said, positive. "So…how was it? You didn't…**_try_** anything on him did you?"

I looked at her, utterly confused. "Wha-? _Try_ anything?" I asked, not getting the implication.

"You _know_-did you…just kiss him with your mouth closed and hands still…or did you open your mouth and do something _more_?" Tenten finally asked with the _most_ perverted smile on her face. She even lifted an eyebrow to give extra emphasis to her lecherous comment.

It was my turn to do the screaming now.

"TENTEN! I DIDN'T THINK YOU'D BE THAT _KIND_ OF PERSON!" I yelled as I yanked at one of her hair buns.

The perverted idiot doubled over in laughter.

"I-I…I w-wanted t-to s-see…h-how y-you'd…react!" Tenten said between her giggles. She wrapped her arms around her stomach from the pain of her mirth. I could tell she was struggling to breathe with each laugh she took. "Th-the FACE! Y-your…f-face! I-it was…SO red…just now!"

I killed the urge to pull her hair again and hogged the blanket away from her, leaving her to feel the icy pecks of the rain.

"Oh, Sakura! You know I was only kidding! I know Lee would never do something like that. He'd probably push you away and start lecturing you about how '_improper'_ it was!" she said, reading my mind.

"That's exactly what he does. It…confuses me…sometimes. He got really upset when I kissed him. He even yelled, he _yelled_ Tenten! I didn't think he knew _how_ to yell! It scared me and yet…it makes me want to stay and help him." I mumbled, burying my face on my knees.

Tenten gave me a mysterious smile and looked up at the receding rain. "You know…last time I ever heard him yell was at Neji…he said something about you…about how Lee should just give up on you because you were so in love with Sasuke. He was so angry Sakura, I thought he was going to _punch_ him. H-he told Neji that someday you would grow out of your crush…th-then he w-would…he would work for your love. I guess he won your love without even trying. You're…you're so lucky…"

I blinked several times, trying to process what had come out of her mouth. "_Lee_ said that? The **cold** and **distant** _Lee_ said that? How long ago was _that_?"

"A long time ago before he…_changed_ I guess. I've always wanted to ask Lee what was wrong with him, but it seemed Neji or Gai Sensei would always stop me. I hate it when I'm left out from things. I think it's because I'm a girl…maybe it's because they think I wouldn't understand." she said as she started pulling leaves off a nearby branch on the wet tree. "Those sexist pigs." she added as a joke.

"Do you have an _idea_ of what might've happened to him?" I asked, wanting to get whatever information I could. Somehow, _somewhere_, in the back of my mind, I didn't trust what Lee had told me about his father. There was something missing…something out of place.

Tenten played with a stray strand of hair hanging from one of her buns and looked hesitant to tell me whatever was buried in her mind. "No…well there was this one day…less than two years ago…we held training sessions one morning and Lee didn't come. Gai Sensei grew worried and said that he and Neji were going to go to his house the next day to look for him. Next thing I knew Lee was in the hospital. Even when I tried to visit him the nurses wouldn't allow _anyone_ in-they said that Sensei had asked to not have any visitors…"

She stayed quiet for a few moments, her expression completely serious and looking at me as though she were fighting with herself about telling me the next part. After that a thick pause followed, the rain abruptly stopped, birds twittered, leaves rustled, Naruto complained about something in the distance, a page was turned in my Sensei's book, I cleared my throat.

"Then what happened?" I asked urgently, leaning closer to her.

"Then…," Tenten took a deep breath and fidgeted with a few leaves, it seemed she was always playing with something whenever she was uncomfortable. "Then…when I finally saw Lee again…he looked…_broken_. He didn't want to train, he didn't want to talk, he never laughed, never joked, never _ate_. Neji told me he was living with Sensei when I begged him to tell me what was wrong with him. That was all he ever told me. He said it was better if I didn't know anything…to not make Lee _remember_…Neji started acting really weird too…almost acting _nicer_ to Lee to make him-"

"Tenten! Sakura! Look at what I can do! LOOK! LOOK! LOOK!" screamed an easily amused Naruto as he walked upside down on top of the river, his hands barely making contact with the freezing water as he touched it.

"SHUT UP NARUTO!" I screamed back.

'_He sure knows how to ruin a moment.' _

I looked over at the boys who were looking at him as though he was an idiot.

"Naruto, stop wasting chakra." I heard Kakashi say boringly. When the blonde didn't listen to his Sensei, Neji lost patience and threw a rock the size of a baseball straight at Naruto. The poor guy lost his balance and control of chakra and ended up plunging into the water. He came back up screaming curses at Neji who was wearing an evil smirk. Kakashi released a brief chuckle, Sasuke snickered, Tenten rolled over in laughter, and Gai Sensei pointed at him and screamed about the 'cruelty of youth' or something.

'_Wait a minute-when did Gai_-' I mentally slapped myself for not noticing our spandex wearing teacher's presence sooner and turned around to see a very sweaty and _very_ irritated Lee trying to catch his breath behind Gai Sensei.

"Neji! That was not very youthful! Stop it before you accompany Lee in _more_ laps around Konoha!"

"Wait-but I already _did_ my laps Sensei, why do I have to do them with Neji if _he_ was the one who-" Lee began in disbelief.

"_More_ laps I say!" was all Gai Sensei said in his thundering voice.

Lee sighed in defeat, rolled his eyes, and stretched his arms. His eyes wandered over to me for a instant before he looked away and pretended to be more interested in stretching his aching…toned…_tense_…muscles.

'_And I thought Tenten was the perverted one.'_ I scolded myself and tried to erase whatever impure thoughts I had of Lee.

I noticed that Gai Sensei gave him an uneasy glance for a _brief_ second. It was long enough for me to become aware of it, but not long enough for anyone else to see.

"Hey Gai…I think training should stop for today…I didn't really have anything else planned with you _or_ your students until in the afternoon." muttered our Sensei from his comfortable position on top of the tree.

"Why Kakashi! Why do you want to cut training so short!? Is it because my students are far superior than yours?"

"No, it's because I'm not an idiot who likes to train while it's raining. I don't want to get wet when it starts to rain again." He answered with his usual dull voice.

"Is it not '**cool'** to train in the rain!?" Gai asked, obviously worried about his social status with his students.

All he got for a reply was the rustling of pages in Kakashi's book.

"Very well my rival! Training will suffice for today until the sky shines brightly once more!" he boomed. He looked over at Lee and placed his hand on his shoulder, leaning close to his ear. His lips moved in a way that meant he was whispering something to my crush. I leaned in as closely as I could to listen to: _'…and do not forget what we talked about Lee.'_ Gai then disappeared in a puff of smoke, leaving a glaring Lee behind him. His eyes had suddenly turned to deadly slits.

I quickly got up and walked up to him, opening my mouth to say something but not having the courage to say it.

"What?" he asked, his angry expression suddenly turning concerned at the sight of me.

"…I…I…" my mouth was dry; it felt like it was stuffed with cotton. I was about to pull my hand up to touch his face before something swiftly grabbed it. All I saw was a blur of black and navy. The being held my hand away from Lee with miniscule force, but it was enough to keep me from caressing him.

The smear of colors turned out to be Sasuke, who rapidly tried to separate me from the man in front of me.

"Sakura, training is over, would you like to go eat some ramen with the idiot and me?" he asked casually, motioning with his head over to the drenched Naruto dragging himself out of the river.

I instantly shook my head, not even needing to think of the answer. "No thanks Sasuke, I'm not very hungry." I quickly pulled my wrist out of his hand to accentuate my reply.

Sasuke frowned and shrugged in that "cool" way that made girls melt. "Do what you want, but I really wanted to talk to you about something important."

"About what?" I asked, taking the bait.

"It's just…" his eyes shifted to Lee, who in turn looked at him indifferently, "it's just something that I've been meaning to talk to you about."

"Well I-"

"Sakura, I think I will leave the two of you alone, I still have to complete the _new_ laps that Gai Sensei has given me. I will see you guys later." He gave us a courteous short bow with his head and walked away from us, giving Sasuke all the privacy I never wanted to have with him. I wanted to call out to him, to tell him not to leave me here, to stay and wait for me, to tell Sasuke to back off when he grabbed my wrist, to do…_something_! But my retaliating body and voice would not do as I wished; it seemed they had a mind of their own.

"Let's walk." Sasuke said, though it was more of an order coming from him. He pulled me by my arm and guided me out of the forest. The last thing I saw out of the training grounds was a glimpse of Lee's retreating form

'_I'll have to come by his apartment later on to scold him because of this.' _

"So where have you been going off to during our breaks Sakura?"

The commanding voice of Sasuke tore me from the thoughts of my crush.

"Uh…j-just n-nowhere…huh?" was all I muttered to him, pretending to not hear his question.

"I went to your house this morning and you weren't there. Where were you?" _Again_ with that peremptory voice of his.

I snapped my arm away from his clutch and looked at him apprehensively. "I-I was…training…I-I thought that I'd get an early start and went running…th-that's why I-I-I was late. Anyway-why were you at my house?" I asked, trying desperately to change the subject so Sasuke wouldn't see through my deception.

He shrugged apathetically and tucked his hands inside his pockets, taking his "_cool_" pose. "I was nearby and thought we could walk together."

"Oh…"

"Also…," his eyes narrowed angrily, "why was he holding you like that?"

"Wh-who?"

"Lee, Sakura who _else_!? Neji could've seen you two from _miles_ away! Not to mention I heard you two jabbering about something _way_ before you met up with us!" he said icily.

"H-he was sh-showing me a n-new t-technique…th-that's all!" I explained clumsily.

"_Some_ technique." He sneered in return.

"Shut up Sasuke…you don't know him at all." I warned, my voice seething.

"Oh, and I suppose _you_ think you do? Listen Sakura…I just don't want…you getting involved with that guy. After what I've heard from Neji…" he trailed off and focused on me.

"Lee is my _friend_ Sasuke! Just like you or Naruto! I don't _care_ about whatever you heard from Neji, Lee will tell me on his _own_ when he's ready." I said with an eerie calmness. Making a scene in front of Sasuke sure wasn't the best method of trying to get away from him; my best chance was to tell him to leave me alone in a polite way.

Sasuke placed both his hands on my shoulders and pierced my eyes. "Sakura…he's not going to tell you anything. He _won't_! He _can't_!"

"Shut up Sasuke! Just shut up!" I yelled while slapping both his hands away from my shoulders. "You don't know _what_ he's told me already!"

"Whatever it was, he was lying Sakura and you probably know it too. Man, what the hell is it with you and him lately? Do you _like_ him or something?" he growled through clenched teeth.

I held back hot tears; I'd be damned before I cried in front of a man again, especially in front of Sasuke. "What if I _do_? There's nothing wrong with that!"

Something happened that froze the blood running through my veins. Sasuke began to chuckle. He bent over and hugged his stomach as his chuckles grew into a fit of laughter. But it wasn't an amused kind of laughter; it was the kind that was on the edge of hysteria and wouldn't go away for an awkward amount of time. It made me want to _loath_ him. At that moment I wanted to hate him more than mornings and being alone and Lee in pain all put together. I'd never thought the first time hearing Sasuke laugh would make me want to punch him.

"_Y-y-you_? An-and b-b-bushy brows!?" he cackled, _mocking_ my feelings for Lee.

I held back and decided not to hurt him since his laughter began to subside.

"Sa-sakura…why such low standards? Why do you insist on liking someone whose skills are weak and average and whose name holds no prominence?" he finally asked monotonously.

"Sasuke…I warn you…don't speak ill of Lee. If you do-"

"You'll do what? Do you know why Lee is like this? Because even his _father_ did not want him! _No one_ wants him! How can you have feelings for someone like that?"

"Shut up Sasuke, that's not true, his father died!" I retorted.

"Whatever the truth may be…I think you can have _so_ much better than him Sakura."

"I don't give a damn about what you think! Lee is the kindest person I've known, he's got strength and passion…something a lot of men _lack_ nowadays." I said, implying offense to Sasuke.

He smirked and leaned closer to me, meeting our lips for a fleeting kiss. He backed away from me before I could object or push him so I was left completely etherized, too stunned to even comprehend what had just happened.

"I'm only telling you this because I want you to be careful Sakura. Also because…well you know." He muttered, trying to hide a chaste blush.

My mouth still remained open, my mind on hold, my eyes _wide_ open.

Suddenly without my realizing, my feet began to move away from Sasuke.

_I was running_.

I ran. I ran away from Sasuke, away from his grasp, away from his volatile attitude, away from his tirades, and…away from that…_kiss_.

I continued to run even after I no longer felt Sasuke's presence. It wasn't just _him_ that I wanted to escape from; it was what he had _said_. My ragged and uneven breaths could no longer keep up with my speed; I swore I was going to collapse. There was a stinging pain coming from my stomach each time I breathed through my mouth. Before my legs finally gave in, I felt my whole body slam into something soft. I went tumbling down and banged the back of my body into the wet earth. It cushioned my fall somewhat. My vision, blurry from tears blocking it, could only catch a dash a green in front of me, also on the floor.

"Sa-sakura? What is _wrong_ with you? It seems each time we meet you have to knock me over!" the person scolded, he had landed on his rear and was currently rubbing the back of his legs in pain.

Never had hearing Lee's familiar warm voice sound so comforting to me.

Always being the impulsive one, I crashed into his body again, not by accident this time, but out of sheer relief of seeing him there. I burst into tears, letting them fall down freely and copiously as I hugged Lee. I held on to him as though I were holding on to my sanity, as if letting go of him would mean letting go of my dear lifeline. I rested my open hands on his chest with such force I thought it would leave bruises. My eyes fluttered open through all the tears and met his face…

And then I kissed him.

I kissed him. Not Sasuke, but _Lee_. I was elated in my actions, (not thinking of the consequences that it would surely bring.) It was as though all doubt had cleansed out of my mind, a huge block had lifted off my shoulders, a weight off my chest! It was as though Sasuke's lips had been the poison, and Lee's: the antidote. I wanted to kiss away Sasuke's untrue lips away by tasting Lee's. I wanted to forget about him and just focus on what was in front of me.

'_What the hell am I doing?'_

It was an awkward kiss, but still a good one nonetheless. Lee obviously hadn't been expecting it, and since I had landed between his legs and could only reach high enough to his chin, I ended up kissing only his lower lip.

'_Well…hopefully the message is still clear.'_

Once I finally unlocked my lips from him, Lee could only gape at me as though I had committed some sort of sacrilege. His lips trembled in an enticing way.

And damn it, that made me want to kiss him again.

I managed to crawl closer to him, digging hands through the wet floor under us, and finally steal his _complete_ lips once more. I cupped the side of his face and kissed his cheek, his jaw, his neck, his forehead, until I decided in the midst of the frenzy to claim his sweet lips for the third time that day. He was so damn…_addictive_.

"Sa-sakura? Sagu-RUH!" was all he could say as I muffled his voice with another hungry kiss.

I didn't want to let him go, I didn't want to hear whatever he wanted to say. I was too afraid for this euphoric moment to slip through my fingers just yet. I simply wanted to delight in the natural sweetness of Lee's lips. Throughout this, I was blissfully oblivious that his lips were unmoving, save for the trembling, as I kissed him. It was only after I pulled away from lack of air and on my own will that I noticed that he had not moved since he had fallen. He still held that blank and _entirely _confused visage. Why hadn't he kissed me back? Why couldn't I get a damn _reaction_ out of him!?

"Um…" was all that dared escape his parting swollen lips. His breathing came in immense, sluggish, uneven intervals. Weariness and shock could easily be seen all over his face from this unexpected act.

"Um? UM?! What kind of reaction is that!?" I chided, frustrated at his odd choice of words.

Lee blinked several times, finally shifting his senses in gear over what happened and looked down to the side. He almost looked _ashamed_ of what we had done because he refused to look at me in the eye. His quivering hands could only clench chunks of mud fervently as his eyes went through a myriad of emotions I could no longer distinguish. Something else hit me that moment: I was unaware of the fact that we had crashed on a puddle of slick _mud_. (Apparently I had been too absorbed in Lee's lips to have even noticed it.) His clothes were now smeared with mud, the prints of my hands clearly visible on the front of his shirt. My arms and hands were heavy with mud, my legs _caked_ with the thick substance.

"Lee…Lee I-I-I th-think we b-better get off the mud." I suggested stupidly.

Lee could only nod as he tried to stand up with his shaking legs. "A-a-agreed." He whispered.

Our feet made slushy sounds with each step we took to the nearest body of water to wash ourselves. Lee apparently had not wanted to talk since he had gotten out of the mud and it was making me anxious, angry, foolish, _perplexed_! He could only continue to walk in an almost _drunken_ state, stumbling here and there before gathering what little he had left of his balance. His eyes only wished to see the ground, adding to my chagrin. Out of all these odd mannerisms of his there was one that stood out the most: the fact that the tips of his fingers kept tracing his lips incessantly. For each time he did that movement, it made me want to find out what was going through his mind. It was almost _frustrating_ me having to watch him do it every few seconds, it was unpleasant, it was perturbing, it was puzzling, it was-

"That's really annoying me Lee. Stop acting like that." I voiced my thoughts aloud for him to hear.

The shocked boy stopped walking and finally looked at me for the first time since we had started walking. He gave me a look that I found amusingly familiar. (It was one that I often gave Naruto whenever he said something stupid.)

"Sakura, y-you just-just KISSED ME! HOW AM I _SUPPOSED_ TO ACT!?" he exploded as he grabbed his hair in both hands in desperation. "I-I had…_BARELY_ gotten over you and **_now_**….THIS HAPPENS! WHAT THE _HELL_ SAKURA!? WHAT **THE** _HELL_!?" He wasn't even _trying_ to hide his emotions anymore. The poor guy had let them _all_ loose for me to bear witness.

"Jeez, it was just a little kiss Lee, get over yourself." I said casually just to tease him. I was a **horrible** _rotten_ person, I was aware of that, but as sick and twisted as it sounded, I wanted to see Lee crack. I wanted him to drop his cool-guy act and fall to pieces before me. Only then could I help him! By seeing the _real_ him, not the reserved caricature he had made of himself, but the _real_ Lee, the one who had once said he would protect me with his life. I was willing to help Lee…even if it meant breaking him once again.

"JUST A KISS!?"

'_At least now I got a reaction.' _

"JUST A _LITTLE_ KISS!?" he repeated, baffled. "That _little_ kiss, threw me MORE off guard than you will EVER know! Do you not KNOW how shocked and PETRIFIED I felt!? **_DO_** YOU!?"

In the midst of his screams I couldn't help but giggle at such raw emotion coming from Lee. It was as amusing as seeing a child throwing a tantrum. He could try as hard as he could, he could _never_ look threatening to me. (The idiot was too damn cute for that.)

"Did you like it?" I suddenly asked, ignoring his outbursts.

"DO YOU HAVE **_ANY_** IDEA WHAT YOU PUT ME THROUGH!? IF I WAS ANY OTHER PERSON WHO DID NOT WISH TO HOLD BACK I WOULD KICK YOUR-eh? Did I like what?" Lee asked, adorably confused.

"The kiss you idiot, what else did you think?" I answered playfully.

He then opened his mouth, but quickly shut it, completely exhausted from trying to scold me. I was a glutton for punishment and he knew it all too well.

"W-well…it-it was….it was fine I suppose." He admitted, defeated. Trying to conceal his crimson cheeks, he turned his back to me and began to walk.

"You _suppose_!?" I asked, taken back.

Lee simply shook his head and tucked his muddied hands inside his pockets as he continued to walk in front of me. "Sakura…I now know why that asexual Sasuke thinks that girls are annoying, why Neji says that they are distracting, why Gai says they are confusing, _and_ why Shikamaru thinks that women are all '_troublesome_.'"

"Really, why?" I asked innocently to further irk him.

He grabbed my hand like a parent holding a child's and sighed. "Just come on."

All I heard from him until we arrived at the river were random mumblings of, "Stupid river….troublesome…annoying…kisses…mud…Gai…"

I quickly made a mental note to kiss him again…

(once he calmed down of course.)


	13. Spiteful Confessions

Hello 'alo! Once again, for the thirteenth time, THANK YOU for your reviews! I've gotten a BUNCH of helpful info and fresh new material to work with. All right people, the votes are in for an update day and Friday won! (Monday and Saturday were second choices.) So now, all chapters will be posted on FRIDAYS. As for how often I'll update…well…that all depends on how much free time I have to write. Practices are beginning again, but I managed to shorten their time (you can only **_guess_** how happy my teammates are.) Also, before I forget, I decided to update _today _on the 27th because of a reason some of Lee's fans may already know. That reason, my friends, is that it's his birthday today! I wanted to make a completely _separate_ fic just for the occasion, (but chapter 13 needed more proof reading and I was bombarded with homework) so I settled for updating early for the last time! It took me the _longest_ time to realize that both Lee and I are a Sagittarius. My birthday is _next_ week so I'm pretty excited about that. Yay for me…I guess…whatever, you guys don't care about that so I'll just get on with the next chapter! So…as always…read, enjoy, and recommend!

**Spiteful Confessions**

The sky was grim silver, its meager rays of sunlight buried between thick grey clouds. Adamant drops of rain dropped to my face as I walked side by side with Lee. The gentle water caressing my skin was almost soothing as it trickled down my tense neck. Lee's warm hand that had once been cupping my own was now entwined in mine, our fingers laced within one another. The wind was lenient with my poorly covered body, making cool contact with my bare arms. I glanced at Lee, his face was slick with water as he continued to walk, his hair no longer taking the shape of a bowl cut. It appeared…different. Now that I could finally stare at Lee like an idiot, I noticed how his wet hair possessed a longer length. It made him look older than he was, more somber, more…serious.

I decided that I did not like Lee with long hair.

I opened my mouth and stuck out my tongue to welcome several drops of water. The fresh clean taste made me savor the liquid even more. My lips trembled, but my body had long grown inure to the briskness of the weather. I found myself _enjoying_ it rather than shivering and complaining about it. What did _I_ have to complain about anyway?

_I had kissed Rock Lee. _

The thought echoed through the corners of my mind, making me grin like a fool each time I remembered it. We had been walking for a few minutes now, the forest had all but disappeared and it looked like we were closer to the village as shops were starting to come into view.

"Hey Lee…where are we going?" I asked, piercing our silence.

Lee's mud covered hand finally released my own as he looked wearily at me.

"To a river…we have to wash this mud off ourselves…that is unless you wish to be questioned by Naruto like the time you and Tenten came **_late_**."

"Lee…my house is like…_ten_ minutes away from here…why don't we just go _there_ instead? I don't really feel like stripping in an icy cold river in the middle of fall." I suggested bluntly.

His pale face had a rush of blood taken to it as I said this.

"NO! I-I mean-no, that is fine Sakura. Last time we were at your house, we were _late_. I do not wish to delay my training any longer. Gai is _already_ upset with me and I do not want to make it worse." He explained as rubbed the back of his neck in annoyance.

"Oh, _come_ on! It won't take long! Plus, Kakashi Sensei told us that we wouldn't have practice until it stopped raining!" I pressured Lee to accept my idea.

He shook his head. "I do not mean for a simple _training_ session Sakura! Thanks to _you_ I still have _plenty_ of laps left to do around Konoha!" he said accusingly.

I couldn't help but feel a tinge of guilt inside my chest knowing I had gotten off easy while _he_ was the one who had been punished. It really wasn't even his fault when I thought about it. Though if it hadn't been for Lee having to run the laps then I would have never of crashed into him, and if I had never crashed into him in an immature fit of tears I would not have kissed him, and if I had not kissed him…well…that would have sucked to say the least.

"Listen Lee…I'm sorry about that…but-HEY I KNOW! If you come with me to my house to dry off I'll do the laps _with_ you!" I bartered hoping it would work.

He smirked and released a sudden chuckle of derision. It was enough to make me glare at him forebodingly.

"Sakura…we are talking about three _hundred_ laps around Konoha…not a simple jog around the training grounds." He said evenly, further testing my temper.

"Yes, I'm well aware of that, and as I said I'll do them _with_ you…whether you come to my house…or not." I said simply.

"I am not trying to sound mean…but I do not think you would be able to handle it." He pointed out, _trying_ to sound polite.

The way he said it made it seem as though I was in an argument that had no reason to be disputed because of its inevitable outcome.

"That sounds funny coming from a guy who couldn't even handle a _kiss_!" I sneered.

"THAT…was different. You do not understand how I felt-"

"You're NOT the _only_ one who's been training these past few years Lee! I've trained too! I'm…I-I'm not that stupid little girl you saved back at the forest!" I yelled furiously.

Lee was taken back by my sudden outburst, but could only sigh tiredly knowing that I wouldn't let him explain himself. "I-I know that Sakura…I know that."

"Then it's settled. You come to my house…and I run the laps with you."

"And if you cannot complete them?"

I thought for a moment, at loss for words. "Well…I guess…I guess I'll copy whatever Gai Sensei does whenever he loses a match with Kakashi Sensei…"

"Sakura…whenever he does that he makes himself kick _every_ damn tree in the training grounds _ten_ times." He said dryly, completely doubting my capabilities.

"Quiet Lee, I'm thinking here…" I interrupted whatever nonsense he was talking about and thought up of a better idea of what would happen if I _didn't_ complete the laps with him. "I'll…I guess I'll cut my hair…maybe if I spent less time on it I'd be a better ninja right?" I joked as I recalled what that kunoichi from the sound village had told me all those years ago. It almost seemed like it hadn't happened at all. It was nothing but a distant memory I had discarded into the depths of my mind and yet it still felt like something out of a dream.

Lee stood quiet, looking uncomfortable as I reminded him of this.

"You…do not have to…cut it." He said uneasily.

I smiled with confidence. "Oh, but I will if I don't complete those laps! I've already made a promise and I'm keeping it! That's what Gai Sensei taught you didn't he?" I chirped happily.

He shrugged, uninterested in what I had to say about his "beloved" sensei. "I only said that because I do not think you like short hair…it has nothing to do with silly promises."

"Silly? _Silly_?! Lee that time I cut my hair was to save my teammates _and_ you! Not liking my hair _short_ was the _least_ of my worries when I saw how beat up you guys looked!" I exclaimed.

Lee gave me a lopsided smile as he recalled the event as well. "Yes…but I was so scared for you…I remember how I could not move…" he mumbled absently. He appeared to be more absorbed in the trip down memory lane than _I_ was.

"Yeah…but you were really brave. I think you looked so cool…" I admitted shyly.

His eyes rose to meet mine and blinked several times, cynical of my confession. "All I did was get beaten up…Sasuke was the one who really saved the day, and do not try and tell me otherwise." He said.

I furrowed my eyebrows together and frowned. "No you didn't. I would've _died_ if you hadn't of come when you did Lee…the fact that you put your life on the line to save mine even though we were enemies was very noble and courageous of you!" I urged him to not think this way.

"The only reason why I helped you was because I was madly in love with you…I-I…I do not think that was noble or brave at all…it was _foolish_. Neji would always tell me that I…"

"Neji can take whatever he said and shove it up his-"

"Sakura! I am SERIOUS! I do not know if I was even _thinking_ straight! The only thing that was on my mind was _you_, and _only_ you. I did not think about the mission, I did not think about my teammates, my life, the scrolls, all I wanted was for you to be safe." He said, a hint of gloom in his voice.

His eyes fell to the ground in disillusion, making me feel a tiny stab in my chest. Had Lee really felt that strongly towards me when we were younger? It was enough to make me want to slap myself for being so superficial. If I would have met the real Lee, if I would have seen what he was really like, if I would have _known_ that he was capable of such affection…I don't think I would have loved Sasuke as much. There I was…adulating a boy who wouldn't even give me the time of day, while there was someone _so_ much better right in front of me. If only I hadn't been so blind…

"If only…" I voiced the last of my thoughts in a low whisper, but with my luck it was enough to make Lee hear.

"If only what Sakura?" he asked, curious.

I shook my head, but smiled impishly as I saw a small convenience store and got an idea. "Nothing, I'll tell you later when we get to the house, but you know what'll cheer _us_ up? Buying artery clogging food and drinks at that convenience store!" I proclaimed while pointing triumphantly at said store.

"Sakura, we are _covered_ in mud, why would you even WANT to buy stuff at a time like this!?" Lee yelled in exasperation. "Why must you be so impulsive!?"

I giggled and somehow managed to drag Lee into the store by his waist, tightly clutching his red ninja headband.

"They are going to kick us out Sakura! Let us just go home! I will cook for you _there_!" he pleaded. His nails screeched along the glass door of the store, holding on for dear life.

"Are you _crazy_!? You've cooked for me so many times that I think lunch and dinner should be on me!" I assured, completely ignoring his protests and dragging his sexy mud covered butt inside the store.

As we opened the door we were greeted by a huge rush of fresh air filled with the scent of candy, instant foods, and coffee.

"Sakura…you are not embarrassed with the _mud_? Everyone is _staring_ at us!" Lee whispered frantically into my ear, trying to hide behind my back.

"_Embarrassed_? That's funny coming from a guy who parades around Konoha wearing a green jumpsuit and orange leg warmers!" I hissed back.

"Keep in mind that _you_ were the one who _kissed_ the guy wearing a green jumpsuit and orange leg warmers! I would be _more_ embarrassed of _that_ fact! We should really-HRM!"

Lee was currently working my last nerve so I decided to cover his mouth with my hands. Even _he_ could be annoying at times.

"Quiet!" I warned, trying to avoid the interested looks and stares coming from several people shopping.

I scanned through what the store had to offer, my stomach grumbling with each thing I saw. Shelves full of instant ramen cups, curry, and cereal enticed me. Small cups of ice cream and frozen dinners made my lips curl into a smile. Carbonated drinks, chips, popcorn, cotton candy, cookies, chocolate, and other endless confections lay waiting for me by the cash register. I probably would have pounced on all the food like a maniac had I not remembered that a very perturbed Lee was trying in vain to hide behind me. I turned around to face him and wanted to laugh at the sight. The side of his cheek I had touched before was smeared with mud, my handprints obvious on his chest, and his jumpsuit barely resembling the color green. He looked back curiously, probably from my amused look.

"Okay LEE! What are you in the mood for!?" I beamed, taking in all the wonderful (and utterly fattening and delicious) food.

"I am not in the mood for _anything_, just get what you want so we can leave!" Lee begged, dodging odd looks from more people.

"Oh, no you _don't_! You're going to eat with me! Plus, I'm paying! It's rude to not accept my offer!" I said angrily while once again dragging a discomfited Lee into the dry instant food section of the store.

I blindly started picking up several ramen cups and handed them to Lee, making sure he was right behind me so he wouldn't think of escaping. He gave me an incredulous look as I continued to bombard him with the food.

"You are not going to be able to eat all of _this_!" he exclaimed, barely being able to carry the growing pile of ramen cups.

"Watch me." I challenged.

"Sakura-!"

"Quick! Get a shopping cart, we're going to be here a while…"

Lee hung his head in surrender, hunched his shoulders, and obediently did as I asked.

"Why do I let you do this to me?" The question was more directed at himself than to me.

"Because deep down you know you love it…" I grumbled under my breath.

"What was that Sakura?"

"I said to hurry up because I'm going to buy some ice cream and chips." I quickly changed my sentence and pulled the cart into the frozen isle.

Lee peered cynically into the foggy glass in front of the ice cream section. "Sakura…you are _not_ eating ice cream and ramen for lunch." He stated in disbelief.

"And why not?" I asked, already helping myself to the pints of ice cream. "You like double choco-vanilla bluecherry swirl don't you?"

"Sakura-! Uh, what?" he asked, the name of the ice cream foreign on his tongue. "I tend to not eat this kind of food…it is not healthy."

"AGH. _LEE_! It's not going to _kill_ you if you eat this stuff **_once_** in a while! What's the point of living if you haven't even **_tasted_** this kind of **_food_** before!?" I inquired, giving him five small buckets of ice cream and three packages of popsicles to place in the cart.

Lee rolled his eyes and followed me as I dove right into the chips section.

"Do you not have enough food _already_?" he asked, leaning against the cart in a tired, (yet sensual way.)

"No." I replied simply. I grabbed a generous amount of bags of chips and dumped them in the cart unceremoniously. I quickly took several handfuls of candy and a few liters of soda.

"Sakura! How the-how on _earth_ do you manage to keep your figure!?" he asked bewildered.

I turned my head to the side to keep my burning face away from his view.

"I-I mean it-it is not like I h-have **_noticed_** your _body_ or anything! I-I mean I do not **look** at you _all_ the time!-I-I am just saying it because you are very _fit_!-it is not as though I **stare** at you when you are not **_looking_**!...None of this is coming out right is it?" he rambled on long after my blush had subsided.

"Not a bit Lee…not a bit." I answered with a smile.

"Hey Sakura…are we done here?"

"Yeah…we are…" I nodded and pulled the cart into the cash register. The employee could only stare at us and the small mountain of junk food that had accumulated in front of him.

"What? Never seen two teenagers covered in mud buying sugar infested snacks?" I asked, motioning to Lee and myself.

The employee looked at us as though we were out of our minds but checked out all the food and stuffed it into five completely filled paper bags.

"That'll be forty-three dollars and sixty-five cents." He said, his eyes wide at the huge number in front of him.

I was already reaching into my mud-filled pocket to pull out my money pouch, before I heard the cash register open with a loud chime.

"Thank you…uh…come again?" the employee asked doubtfully as he continued to gape at our messy appearance.

Lee was already putting his wallet back in his pocket.

"LEE! You JERK! I thought I told you **_I_** was going to pay for it!" I yelled as he began to carry ALL five of the bags in his arms.

"Forget about it Sakura…I do not mind…" he mumbled as he walked out the store, me tailing him all the way. "Men should always pay for ladies." He added with a smile.

"You're not a man, just a jerk…" I huffed angrily, crossing my arms. "At _least_ let me help you carry the bags home!"

He shook his head and motioned with his head the direction of my house. "They are not heavy for me…and your house is not too far from here. Come." He said with a sigh.

I pouted, but obeyed him, knowing that he wouldn't let me carry a thing as long as he was here. "Thanks." I mumbled, keeping in step with him as we walked next to one another. The rain had almost completely stopped again, leaving nothing but a slight drizzle that seemed to appear sporadically. I grew to adore the rain, seeing as it always brought me closer to Lee. Our feet made soggy noises with each step we took on the wet sweet smelling grass. My eyes traveled from the fresh grass to Lee, who appeared to have a pensive expression on his face. I lifted my hand and brought it to his shoulder, gently pulling on it to get his attention.

"What is it Sakura?" he asked, his eyes facing forward, never meeting my own.

"What are you thinking about?" I asked with childlike curiosity.

A thick and lingering silence grew between the two of us, one that threatened to suffocate me if he didn't speak soon. It became difficult to swallow for me. His eyes wavered as his arms tightened nervously around the paper bags, making a crumpling dry sound. His steps became unhurried, his breath shallow.

"I am thinking about the kiss." He said honestly and bluntly.

"What about it?" I asked, trying to sound casual but suddenly feeling awkward around the subject.

"Why did you do it?" he asked, not even taking a second of hesitation.

His sudden candor made my legs tremble, a rush of blood rose to my face.

"I-I…well because I…" I tried to speak, but tripped over my poorly chosen words.

"Why did you kiss me Sakura?" he repeated the abhorred question succinctly.

"I uh…well…OH, LOOK we're here!" I quickly bellowed seeing my house across the street from of us.

"Sakura." His voice held no anger, no kindness, no emotion. It was just my name being said by someone who was being ignored.

"Well, come on Lee!" I said a bit too excitedly as I pulled on his arm and ran across the street. I was already walking the last few steps leading to my door when I felt Lee tense up, making me unable to pull him any longer.

"Sakura…answer me." He asked tonelessly.

I dared not to turn around and see his face. If I did that I knew I would probably blurt my heart out to him.

'_And I'm not willing to hurt myself yet Lee…not yet…not anytime soon.' _

I could only hold on to his outstretched arm, and hope that somehow he would drop the subject.

"Sakura tell me why you ki-"

"I'll tell you about it when we get inside." I muttered angrily, trying with all my strength to pull his body further to the door.

He would not budge.

"Please?" I asked, almost sadly.

My tearful voice finally succeeded in making Lee relax as he gave in and walked the last steps.

"Um, Sakura?" His dull voice had now depleted to no more than an innocent question with a sweet tone to it.

I quickly turned around to face him and gave him my best smile. "Yeah?"

"I really do not feel comfortable about coming inside your house caked with mud." He whispered, looking shyly at my front door.

My smile faltered at his uneasiness. "Lee…you're talking to the girl who left _huge_ puddles of water inside your apartment…"

"Yes, but it is not the same thing as mud!" he explained, taking a step back.

"JUST-oh, come on!" I said exasperatedly as I opened the door, grabbed his hand, and led him under the threshold. "Just take off your shoes."

He did as he was told and placed them by the wall close to the door.

"Now what?" he asked, not wanting to move an inch around my house. He looked like he was terrified of staining or even _looking_ at anything in his current state.

"Now you strip." I said with the same frankness Lee had used on me moments ago.

"I beg your pardon?" he asked, dropping all the paper bags from the sudden alarm.

"I'll tell you again: **strip**. You and I need to get out of these clothes so I can wash them." I said with the same casualness I would have used had I been talking to Tenten or Ino.

"Sakura, I am NOT taking off my _clothes_! I am starting to think the only reason you invited me over was for _this_ to happen!" Lee accused in disbelief.

I rolled my eyes, walking over to a small closet in my hallway and taking out two towels. "Don't flatter yourself…you can go into the bathroom upstairs to wash up, _then_ you can give me your clothes. I don't want to see _anything_."

"Funny…it did not _seem_ that way when you walked in on me during my morning exercises." He pointed out, walking toward me until we were a foot apart. Before I could retort a witty insult, he lifted his right hand and held it underneath my chin.

I swear I could feel my own heart seizing to beat when the idiot did this.

He lifted my chin with the side of his index finger and traced his thumb against my lips, looking at me, _tantalizing_ me. It took me a _full_ minute to realize that what I **_thought_** was a sign of affection was just him _using_ it as a cover to smear **_mud_** on my lips. He quickly snatched a towel from me and ran up the stairs (laughing) toward the bathroom before I could have a chance smack him.

"LEE YOU JERK!" I screamed, following him up the stairs to try to hit him. My attempts were in vain for he was already inside my bathroom when I caught up to him.

"YOU _FELL_ FOR IT!" was the laughing reply I received behind the safety of a locked bathroom door.

(And I guess that was the end of his uneasiness around my house.)

Defeated, I walked to my room and (after making sure of locking my door) proceeded to _literally_ peel off my soggy and muddy clothes. The rain had already washed away most of the mud from my legs, so all I really did was dry myself off with a towel. After that was done, I went into my closet and took out some red shorts and a white shirt to make myself comfortable. _'I wonder what Lee's going to wear? Well…I **could** just make him walk around my house naked until his clothes dry.'_ With a quick check at my mirror and a stifled perverted giggle, I exited my room to try to solve this matter.

'_Damn it, I should've just made Lee take off his clothes in front of my door!' _I lamented ever telling Lee where my bathroom was now that I kept hearing the shuffling of his clothes being straightened out. I softly knocked on the door.

"Lee…you done in there? What are you doing?" I asked just to annoy him.

"I am posing in front of your bathroom mirror, you know how much I love that-WHAT DO YOU **_THINK_** I AM DOING!? I am trying to take off this stupid jumpsuit! You have **_no_** idea how hard it is to take it off once it is wet!" was my huffed reply.

"Need any help?" I asked lecherously, expecting another angry scream or scolding from him.

"NO!..."

There was a slight pause, almost as though he were thinking about my offer.

"Well…actually…would you mind? I-I cannot take this thing off me!" he asked, embarrassed.

Another pregnant silence.

"Lee…I don't think I was being serious."

"NO-NO THEN! It is fine! I am so sorry I asked Sakura, that must have been very rude! I think I will-"

"Hey-I mean…if you're _serious_-then I-I don't mind." I began, trying to calm his propriety speech before it got too far.

"A minute ago you said you were _not_ serious." He said, almost offended.

"Well…now I am…so _open_ up!" I muttered.

There was a minute of tension between us, as though we were both getting ready for what we were going to do.

There was a slight clinking noise coming from the doorknob, which could only mean that Lee was unlocking it.

The door opened.

And my heart went into cardiac arrest.

My mouth went dry as I continued to gawk like an idiot at the person in front of me. There…(sporting a _very_ worried look) stood Lee, trying helplessly to fight his way out of his jumpsuit. Well…technically he had a_ quarter_ of it off already…it's just that the top half of his shirt section refused to peel off him. The other half of the shirt lay dangling in mid air, giving me a rather _generous_ look of the right side of is body. I looked at _everything_ I could like a starved man looking at a feast, from his muscular arms to his hard abdomen, to the _tiny_ glimpses of his _black_ boxers.

"Sakura, I did not open the door so you could stare at me like that…can you please help me out of the rest of this thing?" his bored tone put a screeching halt to my thoughts as I plummeted back down to earth.

"I wasn't _staring_!" I hissed, quickly peeling off his stubborn clothing. (My eyes said otherwise.)

"Sakura…you are such a liar." Lee said with a chuckle as he stretched his constricted arms.

"Call me whatever you want, it's _you_ who wanted the damn help."

"Yes, but I do not recall asking for that _look_." He remarked.

"_What_ look?" I asked angrily, not being able to tear my eyes away from his body.

"That _look_ you give me sometimes. I often see Tenten wearing it whenever she looks at Neji." Lee tried to explain in vain. Lost in thought, he continued to take off the _rest_ of his jumpsuit to finally reveal his tight boxer **_briefs_**.

"Oh, but Lee, Tenten doesn't look at Neji like he's an _idiot_." I teased, earning a frown from him. It was my turn to run out of his grasp as he threw me his wet clothes and slammed the bathroom door closed.

"Fine Lee, _real_ mature! Just because of that, I won't give you clothes to wear! You'll have to walk around my house in your _underwear_ until your clothes dry!" I yelled, loving to get a reaction out of the poor guy.

"Well, at least _you_ will get what _you_ want!" he answered back.

My light laughter filled my empty house as I stuffed the clothes in the washing machine. I then looked around my mom's room for something to wear. I couldn't really give him one of _my_ shirts, they would be too small for him. The next best option would be something that belonged to my father. I hadn't seen him in quite some time, and I doubted he'd be back any time soon from his missions, so he couldn't _possibly_ mind if one of his shirts went missing…right?

'_Right.'_ I mentally assured myself.

I peered inside his side of the closet, trying to see what I had to work with, and after some rummaging, I finally decided on a buttoned up white shirt and a pair of black pants. I quickly made my way back to the bathroom door and knocked loudly and continuously until it flung open to reveal Lee (yet again) in all his glory.

"What…**is** **it**?" He asked, his right eye twitching repeatedly.

"Your clothes!" I said innocently, extending them to his face.

Lee took a deep breath (probably fighting the urge to scold me) and peacefully accepted the clothes. He wasted no time in privacy; he simply put the clothes on where he stood.

"You hungry?" I asked about his appetite for the third time that day.

"If I lie and say yes, will you stop asking me?" he asked back, fastening the last buttons of the shirt.

I nodded and dragged him downstairs like a rag doll, his feet often slipping and screeching from the abrupt movement on the tile. Once we were in the kitchen, I pushed him down rather forcibly on a chair.

"You want to see what I got?" I asked as though he hadn't been standing _right_ next to me when I shopped for all the food. I looked through the five bags and dumped all their contents on my kitchen table for Lee to see.

"The ice cream…is melting." He stated dully, pointing at a gooey stream of melted ice cream oozing out the edges of the buckets.

"Oh crap! Well-well, we can fix that!" I stammered frantically as I gathered up the buckets and ungracefully threw them inside my empty freezer.

Lee could only stare at me as if I was crazy.

I looked at what else he had purchased for me.

"How about some ramen? You love ramen right?" I asked uneasily while taking two cups of the noodles and violently tearing off their lids.

Lee shrugged coolly, putting up his "act" for me once more.

'_Fine…we can play that game.' _

I went to the sink and filled both cups to the brim with water. Giving Lee one of my cute smiles, I walked to the microwave and opened it.

"You know, I heard that you really should not put those ramen cups in microwaves. It is supposed to be unhealthy or something…"

I shrugged, copying his "cool" act. Then I proceeded to stuff _both_ the cups inside and punch three minutes for the time.

I heard him sigh. "If your kitchen sets on fire again I am _not_ helping you clean up."

"It's not like I _asked_ last time, as I recall…you invited _yourself_ inside my house." I taunted, walking over to Lee and taking a chair next to him by the table.

"Well excuse me for worrying about you then." He said as he scooted his chair a few inches away from me.

"Well…to tell you the truth…I kinda like it when you do." I said all while feeling a coyness that rivaled that of Hinata's.

"You never answered my question Sakura." He said as he brushed my affectionate comment aside indifferently.

"What…what question?" I asked dumbly, already slipping out of my seat and walking up my kitchen shelves to stare at them. _Anything_ looked more interesting than having to hear Lee discuss the kiss all of a sudden.

"About why you kissed me of course."

I cringed.

"How many reasons can there be for _kissing_ someone Lee? You're smart, _you_ figure it out." I replied trying to avoid the question.

"Okay…just for a second, _pretend_ that I am not as smart as you assume."

"Lee…_just_…shut up." I supplicated, getting agitated by his attitude.

"Why do you not just _tell_ me? How hard can it _possibly_ be to just tell me why you kissed me!?" Lee silenced my pleas with his sharp voice.

"Because I'm AFRAID of what you'll _say_!" I screamed as I slammed by fists on the shelves, shaking everything on top of it.

The microwave's incessant beeping was the only sound emitting from the room as Lee pondered on continuing now that I was angry.

"Well…if you want to kiss me just to leave me confused about it afterward…then that is rather selfish of you."

"How is _that_ selfish!?" I exclaimed bitterly.

"You kiss me…_three_ times at that….and you do not even want to know how I felt about it…how I _feel_ right **_now_**! You have no regards for anyone's feelings except your own! _That_…Sakura…is selfishness." He scolded while giving me a stern look.

"Oh, please Lee, you're starting to sound like a girl." I sneered, opening the microwave door and taking out the cups.

"And you are starting to sound like a child."

"FINE LEE! _FINE_! What do you feel right now about that _damn_ kiss!?" I shouted as I slammed a cup in front of him.

"Well now that I know you do not really mean that, I do not feel like telling you." Lee answered while crossing his arms over his chest. "First…why do **_you_** not tell what you felt?"

"Well…FINE! Do you want to know what I felt? I felt like those kisses were the best kisses I've had in my life! I felt like you have the sweetest lips! I _feel_ like I'm going to die each time I see you without a shirt! I feel special because of your kindness and passion! I feel like you are one of the last decent guys left on this earth! I feel like I want to get to know you better after all these years! I feel like-_like_ **_crap_** for treating you like a loser when we were young! I feel like you don't like me anymore! I feel like after I'm done saying this you'll probably start gawking at me like an idiot like you are _now_! And right now…I feel like I don't know whether I should slap you or kiss you for making me say this!" I finished breathlessly.

I was right; Lee _was_ staring at me as if I was insane after my little tirade.

"I…I just felt…**_numb_**." He admitted slowly.

"Numb?" I asked as I poked the lid of my cup.

He nodded and looked uninterestedly at his noodles. "I do not know if it makes sense to you…but…when you…_kissed_ me…I could not do anything…I felt so unbearably numb. When you _stopped_ kissing me…I felt like a coward for not being able…to _say_ anything to you and I felt…like a _horrible_ person for just standing there shocked…in front of you like a gawking fool...like I am now."

"…Oh…" I mumbled as I grabbed a pair of chopsticks from the middle of my table and swirled the noodles around in my cup.

Lee gingerly took a pair of chopsticks as well but only played with his food.

"Is that why you stare at me?" he asked as he brought his eyes to meet mine.

"Eh-what?" I was already slurping down my noodles.

He let out a chuckle when the noodles stuck to the corners of my lips. "So _that's_ why you stare at me so oddly!"

"Well, _duh_, I mean-you're practically giving me a free show whenever you take off _any_ part of your clothes." I answered simply as I took another bite of noodles.

Lee blushed and turned his attention to the food in front of him. "I am sorry…that is probably most…_indecent_ of me."

"Yeah…but I'm not complaining."

"Is that _all_ girls think about? Tenten usually has the same look _you_ have whenever she is gawking at boys." He said puzzled.

"Hey! _Guys_ think about sex just as much as girls do!" I pointed out almost offended.

"I was not _talking_ about **_sex_**! I was just talking about girls staring at boys!" he exclaimed with a blood red face. "At least now I know what _you_ are thinking about whenever you **_space_** out!"

"I don't think about it _all the time_ you pervert, but it's kinda hard _not_ to whenever you're _stripping_ in front of me!" I remarked while giggling.

"What!? If anything _you_ are the one who walks in on me when I am-agh…forget it! J-just forget it!…You are not taking this seriously!" He said angrily as he ate a small strand of noodle and glared adorably at me.

That only worsened my giggles. "Y-y-you l-look s-so c-cute wh-when you d-do that!"

Lee's expression suddenly turned serious, not wanting to be the cause of my laughter any longer. His eyes were fixed on my table as his bandaged fingers tapped my table. The lips which I delighted in kissing were now firmly pressed together, holding back an admonishment no doubt. He sighed deeply and tiredly, making me notice how the intake of air made his strong chest rise. The buttons which were left undone under his neck made the visible flesh all the more enticing to me. It made me wonder how it would feel like to _touch_ his bare chest, to touch his strong unbandaged arms, his waist which possessed not an ounce of fat on it, his legs that were perfected with each kick and lap…

"Hey…Lee?" the sound of my own voice kicked me out of my exciting thoughts.

"What." It wasn't a question, it wasn't even an angry statement. The tone was an unclear mix of transient feelings.

"So what do you think…about-about this?" I asked cautiously, preparing myself for Lee's unknown feelings.

"About what?" he asked with a bored tone. He continued to play with his noodles as though they were some sort of inedible object.

"A-about **_this_**. About…um…_us_." I tried as best I could to explain.

"Are you willing to listen to my feelings _now_?" he asked rather irritated. He laced his fingers together and brought them up to his lips, making him look like he was deep in thought.

With a quick reassuring nod of my head, he took a swig of breath to steady himself.

"I….I do not…know _how_ I-I feel….Sakura. I-I mean-I am still in…_pure_ shock over what you have…what you have…done…" he said rather shakily.

I felt like something needed to be said lest I endured the agonizing pauses between Lee's answers.

"Hey…Lee? About what you said…you know-when I first saw you….about you getting over 'silly crushes'…was that…._me_ you were talking about by any chance?" I asked, desperately hoping that it wasn't.

When Lee avoided my eyes by shifting his head, I held back a shaky breath. I soon regretted asking such a foolish thing seeing as there was nothing I could do now but wait for my heart to be trampled.

"Sakura I…do you know…h-how **_hard_** it was to get over you?! _Everyday_ I kept telling myself that I was not worth your love-that I was not worth _anything_ at all! I _knew_ that it was all lies when I kept telling Neji that someday you would get over Sasuke and be with me! I _knew_ that it was all lies when I said that I would work for your love. You have no idea–_NO_ **_idea_** how many times my father beat it into me that I would never find a girl because of how I was. Even Tenten and Gai often told me to just forget about you Sakura! Not a **_single_** person approved of my feelings-_no one_ encouraged me! I was PRACTICALLY told _each_ day that I was incapable of having someone to _love_ me! Do you have…_any _idea…of how much pain you put me through before I finally got it through my thick head to just _forget_ about you!? Now you come back, kiss me, and tell me you have feelings for me!? HOW CAN I ACCEPT THAT!? _DAMN_ IT ALL SAKURA! DAMN **_YOU_**!" he yelled, making my whole body shake. He rested his elbows on the table and grabbed the sides of his head to shield himself from me.

"Lee-I-I…" my voice was breaking….breaking right along with my heart.

"Oh, save it Sakura! Did you THINK you could just come back-just _waltz_ in here and kiss me to remind me of what I cannot have!? Or what-did you think it would be _funny_ to prove my father and peers wrong!? Or maybe I was just your _second_ **damn** choice when you finally noticed that Sasuke did not deserve your love!? Did you THINK that I would _ALWAYS_ be waiting for you like a **damn** love sick _FOOL_!? DID YOU!?" he cried, his voice drenched with spite and anguish.

It became an ordeal for me to breathe when I heard him yell. There was a dry lump in my throat that refused to be swallowed and a stinging in my eyes that refused to be ignored. My chest ached, my head pulsed with pain, my limbs went numb. Was this a broken heart? It hurt more than all the rejections from Sasuke _combined_ when we were young. It hurt more than drowning-hell I _was_ drowning again. Instead, this time there was no water to choke my breaths…Lee's words were enough. I blinked several times to hold back scalding tears.

"I-I kissed you…because I like you Lee. I really do…and I don't care if you don't have feelings for me anymore…I just want you to be…_happy_." I said as I rubbed my right eye with the back of my hand.

Lee got out of his chair and slowly kneeled in front of me like a man proposing marriage. (Although I knew his words would be _anything_ but romantic.)

"You want me to be happy Sakura? _Fine_….then let me keep hating you _and_ myself….because _that_…is what makes me happy." He said through clenched teeth.

I clutched the sides of my chair tightly, not being to believe what he had said. My watery eyes wavered with each breath I took. I plastered on a smile and held back my pitiful tears.

"All right…Lee…I-I don't mind….because I-I deserve that after all the crap I've pulled in the past…" I mumbled sadly, as I looked at his ruthless expression. "But you're wrong about one thing Lee….**_I'm_** the one who's not worthy of your love. All this time…you have been trying to prove yourself to me and I was too much of a _fool_ to notice! You gave me something precious…and I crushed it like the idiot that I am! You saved my life…and I was an ingrate. You told me you would protect me…and I could muster no words. Lee I'm so sorry! I-I-I'm sorry! I don't want you to forgive me, I'm not worth that…I just want to say that I'm sorry for putting you through that hell! I feel like I should just die! I am nothing but a coward and-"

I could no longer finish my diatribe; Lee's harsh grip on both my arms had silenced my voice. "SHUT UP, SAKURA! JUST _SHUT_ _UP_!" Lee screamed as he released my arms, grabbed both my shoulders and looked at me in the eye. "Why the hell could you not have kept loving Sasuke!? Why not a genius like Neji!? Why not someone with promise and a future like Naruto!? I am _nothing_ Sakura! I am _nothing_ but the disowned bastard son of some unknown mother! I am weak! I have _nothing_ to offer you! Why do you not see that!?"

I unconsciously lifted my hand toward his face, my fingertips touching his lips and cheeks. "I-I don't love them Lee…because they are not you. _You're_ the one that I want! I don't _care_ if that's not good enough for anyone else! I could give a _damn_ what anyone else thinks!" I cried as I leaned in to embrace him.

Lee backed away before our bodies could ever touch.

"_DAMN_ YOU SAKURA! _Why_ did you have to kiss me? Why _now_ of all times!? Why **_now_**!? Why could you not have kept on **_hating_** me as I hate you now!?" His yells resonated across the kitchen.

It was like adding salt to a wound.

A long and brim silence took over our conversation after I heard his screams. He had walked away from the table and stood behind my kitchen window, staring aimlessly at the rain. Tears were already flowing down my cheeks and it seemed the more I rubbed away at them the more they would appear. I lifted my hand to my chest and clutched the side of my heart. It had felt like someone had stabbed me there…but with Lee's words, he had only twisted the knife. Breathing suddenly became a tedious task; it was something I no longer _wished_ to do.

"L-Lee?" I stuttered, choking back tears.

He did not move from his spot behind the window. The back of his ominous posture bore an image into my mind; it was an image that warned me that the old Lee was gone. The zealous and smiling boy was **dead**….and this bitter and grown man had taken his place.

"What?" his voice was hostile, distant.

"Wh-what…are we?" I asked meekly, feeling like a burden when he turned around to glare at me.

"'What are we?' What do you _want_ us to be after this?" he asked icily.

I smiled dejectedly at him and stared at the floor. "I want us to be…" I shook my head and rubbed my eyes to rid myself of my troublesome tears, "we can be whatever **_you_** want us to be Lee."

Lee held a curious expression, making a sliver of hope flicker in my rejected beating heart. He walked toward my living room door and opened it, letting the drizzle of the rain enter my home. As he took two steps out the door, he turned his head and briefly took one last look at me.

"We are _nothing_ then."

The door slammed shut.


	14. A Broken Heart and Promise

Hello alo'! Words can't even _begin_ to describe how incredibly thankful I am for your reviews! I apologize if this chapter was a bit late! With final exams this week, practice, and outings for the holidays, it's been nearly impossible to find some time alone to write this chapter. It's all right now though, I'm officially on Christmas break! (As soon as I got out of class today I finished this chapter!) Now with free time on my hands, I can hopefully relax and write more! It was really difficult to find inspiration for this part though…(I couldn't write it in class, I couldn't write it at home, and I couldn't even _think_ of it during practice because then I'd space out!) Again, THANK YOU guys SO MUCH for those wonderful reviews. I noticed that I've gotten some NEW reviewers, and I just want to thank them as well! As for those readers who have been reviewing since the start…whether the reviews are short or long, positive or negative, they've helped me out more than you guys will _ever_ know. THANK YOU. So as always…read, enjoy, and recommend!

**A Broken Heart and Promise**

****

'_It hurts…'_

'…_it hurts **a lot**.'_

Those were my first thoughts as my body continued to shake long after Lee's harsh words had ended resonating in my mind. I felt…_sore_…somehow, like there was this feeling of utter despair that I could not escape no matter how desperately I tried to shut it out of my consciousness. I pressed my lips tightly together to hold back a sob. In a weak attempt to get off my chair, I stumbled off and landed on the cool floor on my trembling knees. My chest felt _constricted_, hurt….**_bruised_**. Tears prickled my eyes until I covered my face with both hands, fervently trying to keep them from streaming down my face. I bit my tongue, in hopes of shushing my screams.

I flinched when my teeth drew blood instead.

The tiny crimson specks mingled in my mouth, letting me taste the awful coppery substance. Forcing myself to swallow both my shame and blood, I shakily rose from the floor and tried to steady and collect myself. _'This…th-this is okay… I'm going to be okay.'_ I tried to placate myself. I had been through this hell before and heartbreak wasn't new to me. I _knew_ that I was strong, I _knew_ that this couldn't hurt me, I _knew_ that I was going to make it through, I _knew_ that I was NOT going to shed tears for Lee. He didn't _deserve_ them…not a **_single_** one…

All it took was an uncertain whimper from me and I burst out sobbing.

"Lee, you…you…you _BASTARD_!" I finally screamed, no longer holding back my voice.

I wrapped my arms around myself in self-pity and fell to the ground again, unable to deal with the irreparable damage I had caused. My heart ached with an omnipresent feeling of emptiness and solitude that I had not felt since Sasuke has forsaken me. It was horrible…it was **_unbearable_**.

"YOU BASTARD! YOU BASTARD! YOU BASTARD!" I continued to scream, hunching over myself.

Heavy warm tears stained my red shorts as I continued to shriek my frustrations and curses at the boy I loved. '_Why?! Why do all the boys I like have to **hate** me?! Why do they have to see me as a **burden**?!' _

"_WHY_!?" I shouted, tightening my hold around my own quivering body.

I cried for what felt like hours on my cold kitchen floor, letting my tears fall freely until they languished on their own.

'_I loved you, you bastard!' _I thought, full of scorn.

The mere _memory_ of knowing I had touched and kissed him made me feel so…**_tarnished_**. It made me feel as though I had taken…_advantage_ of Lee. He never _once_ kissed me back in all the times I had taken his lips, only stood frozen. It wasn't _shock_ that had kept him from pushing me away when I kissed him…it was **pity**.

The realization struck me like a slap to my face.

'_Th-that…that…that…' _

I couldn't even finish my thought as I placed both my hands over my mouth to prevent myself from gagging. Swiftly rising from the floor, I sprinted to my bathroom.

'_Why do all boys have to make me feel so tainted!?'_ my mind screamed at me as I jerked the tub's faucet on to the hottest water it could muster. I slammed the door closed and frantically took my clothes off; wanting horribly to rid myself of _anything_ Lee had touched.

'_Lee **never** wanted to kiss me back! He never even wanted to be **friends** with me! I just filled my head with stupid assumptions! Even though I loved him! I **loved** him! And yet all I deserve is his loathing!'_

Fresh warm tears rolled down my face as I dipped myself into the scalding water. It burned my skin, but I did not care. The only thing I cared about, the only thing I _wanted_ to do was wash away my guilt and shame.

'_Damn it heart…stop…BREAKING!'_ I clutched my chest and held it tight, _abhorring_ the pain.

I grabbed a bar of soap and violently scrubbed my arms, my legs, my shoulders, my…_lips_! I held the soap mere centimeters away from my mouth. My fingertips ran across my lips, unable to fathom what I had done. There was _nothing_ I could do about all the kisses I had stolen from Lee. It was as though I had committed an iniquity that refused to leave me alone. I quickly rubbed the soap on my lips, trying to wash away the memory of his sweet lips by having this new _bitter_ taste on my mouth.

"Lee…oh, god Lee what did I-what did I do!?" I asked myself as I got out of the tub and wrapped a towel around me. I did not bother to pick up my clothes; I didn't want to _see_ them much less _touch_ them. Never had I felt so…_disgusted_ and reviled as I did now.

I hated it.

I hated _myself_.

I _hated_ myself more than early mornings, I _hated_ myself more being alone, and I _hated_ myself more than watching Lee in pain. The bleak feeling was…_insufferable_.

Holding back the urge to punch my mirror when I glanced at my horrible reflection, I walked back to my room. My feet were as heavy as the broken heart I carried.

"I…I _hate_ you too Lee." I whispered wryly as I dumped myself face down on my bed. My pillow soon became damp with my wet hair and tears, but I refused to acknowledge it. "I…_HATE_ YOU!" I screamed into my pillow, the harsh sound of my voice drowning in it.

Yet…why did I still love that bastard?

I ignored the thought, feeling too miserable to even care. Turning my body slowly to face my window, I noticed that the rain has slowed to a steady drumming at my glass.

It seemed like the rain never stopped falling.

I rubbed away tears from my eyes, which seemed to be doing the same thing.

My nascent feelings toward Lee, which had slowly grown into a deep affection, had been abruptly cut from the roots. It made me question my love for him…and it made me afraid.

A loud beeping interrupted me from my mourning.

'_No…don't tell me…they're still here…damn…I really do hate you now…'_ I thought as I was forced to get out of bed and drag myself to my laundry room.

I opened the dryer and what appeared to be Lee's green crumpled jumpsuit stared back at me…almost mockingly. His abandoned headband also lay dangling from a hanger, slowly drifting back and forth to exacerbate my mood.

"WHAT THE HELL AM I SUPPOSED TO DO _NOW_!?" I yelled inside the tiny room, frustrated to no end. I violently jerked the clothes out of the dryer and yanked the headband off the hanger to storm back to my room. Once there, I dumped them on my bed and glared menacingly at them. "YOU….YOU IDIOT!"

My boisterous raging continued for about another several minutes before subsiding to heavy pants. I angrily took his jumpsuit off my bed and threw it on the ground.

'_How the hell am I supposed to give it back **now**?' _

There was no way-NO WAY in _hell_ that I would be able to face Lee after what he had said. I didn't want to look like some needy helpless girl with a crush by giving him his clothes. That _idiot_ would just have to come to _me_ once he realized he was wearing my _father's_ clothes! Crossing my arms in triumph, I dumped myself on my bed.

"I guess…I guess that's that then." I mumbled, suddenly forgetting my ranting tears. I turned to lie down on my nauseous stomach, which threatened to reject the ramen I had eaten earlier, when my hand touched something cold. Curious to see what it was, I forced myself to turn my head to the side.

It was Lee's ninja headband.

Lying there, staring at it up close for the time, made me wonder **_why_** it was red and not blue like ours. Maybe it had some sentimental value to it, or maybe it was just another way to emulate his Sensei. Whatever reason it was, it made me want to take it in my hands and walk up to my mirror. I tried to ignore my reflection in it, my eyes looked like glass from all the crying and I was sure my hair was a mess.

'_Why is it red Lee?' _

I let the thought play around in my mind while I slowly lifted the headband up to my eyes, allowing me to scrutinize every detail of it. It was no different from mine, save for the color, but then why did it captivate me so much? Without fully realizing it, I began to tie it around my forehead, trying to see if it even _felt_ any different.

It didn't.

The cool metal pressed through the red fabric and touched my skin. I pulled my hair back as I tied a knot, all while viewing my reflection. It didn't _look_ any different, it didn't _feel_ any different…and yet…it still _fascinated_ me. It felt…comforting to wearing it. He had worn it when I had first met him, when he mopped the floor with Sasuke, when he first saved me, and when he told me…when he told me…

'_When he told me he loved me.' _

The last memory pricked at my chest, lamenting over that weird sweet boy. He was _gone_, and **nothing** could bring him back to his old self. True, I probably deserved it, but that in **no** way explained his past to me. I wanted to help him, and yet I allowed my feelings to get in the way. I took off the headband and returned to the solace of my bed, clutching the metal close to my chest. There was not much I could do-nor _wanted_ to do, but sleep as I felt my strength slowly enervate from my body.

I didn't rouse from my profound sleep until the next morning. It was a rather rude awaking considering the blaring sound of my alarm clock, which (miraculously) had actually decided to _work_ today. The harsh sunlight pouring into my room through my thin curtains made me want to throw the covers over my head. To my disappointment, the sound of rain was nonexistent; it was as though it had never happened. I peeked with a somnolent eye in the window to realize the warm sun had returned. Birds chirped happily in the distance, some even stopping shortly to perch on my windowsill. Their vivacious singing seemed to be a cheer meant just for me to get out of bed and face a brand new day.

'_Stupid birds.' _

I really hated mornings.

Resisting the urge to loll in my bed, I dragged myself out and stretched my arms. As I walked into my bathroom, I tried to evade Lee's jumpsuit still lying crumpled on the ground. I knew I was going to have to give it back to him eventually and I _hated_ it.

I really did.

I got dressed, ate cookies for breakfast, and found myself staring at the _same_ jumpsuit an hour later before I had to leave. It's not that I was embarrassed to give it to him, I was terribly _afraid_ of him completely ignoring me if I gave it back to him.

'_What would I say? What would **he** say? What would I do? What would **he** do?' _

My mind spun with questions that would soon turn trivial once I faced him again. I grabbed the small blue backpack that I often took to missions and stuffed both the jumpsuit and headband inside, being aware of why I did this. I knew I couldn't just _carry_ the stuff in my arms, it would attract too much attention from my teammates (namely Naruto's) and I didn't want _either_ of my Senseis to be giving me weird looks when they saw me give Lee his **_clothes_** back to him. I quickly slung the backpack over my shoulder and got out of my house.

As I walked to our designated meeting place in the training grounds I couldn't help but feel a certain dread. It was as though I was getting closer to some grim event with each agonizing step I took. The part that terrified me the most was that there was _nothing_ I could do to avoid whatever was going to happen between Lee and me.

'_Tenten's going to want to know what happened if she notices anything different about me…what can I say to her!? I don't think I can talk without my voice cracking up from the tears. What if someone **else** notices? What is **Sensei** notices? Man, I'm screwed no matter WHAT I do.'_

I honestly didn't see how my day could get any worse.

"HEY SAKURA!"

I think it just did.

Naruto's screeching voice nearly made me cringe. Trying my best to compose myself, I plastered on the best smile a crappy night could muster and held on tightly to my backpack. All I had to do was act…_normal_. Act like _myself_ so then I wouldn't attract others.

"WELL, HI TO YOU _TOO_ NARUTO!" I yelled back with a saccharine voice rivaling that of Naruto's.

The people behind Naruto (who upon closer inspection were my teammates and Sensei) all shot their heads up in confusion at my sudden brash scream.

"So much for acting normal." I grumbled under my breath before running up to meet my group.

"You're actually ON TIME today Sakura! Kakashi Sensei isn't even here yet!" Naruto continued to yell as though we were a mile apart even though I was _right_ in _front_ of him.

"Th-that's…" my voice cracked as I began to speak. My throat felt raw and stung with each syllable that came out of my mouth. Naurto's expression suddenly turned to one of concern before I cleared my voice to calm him. "Sorry…my throat just feels a little sore this morning…but that's good to hear-that I'm not late I mean..." I muttered with a decent voice. I made sure to keep my head down to avoid being studied by everyone, but somehow I still felt their eyes on me, watching every little detail, examining every miniscule change in my mood.

I looked up to see Neji's eyes narrow suspiciously at me, as though wanting to say something vile but deciding against it. Sasuke was unfazed by my appearance; he kept to himself and avoided looking at me. Naruto glanced at Sasuke and me with an inquisitive face, completely unaware of our tacit kiss and quarrel. Tenten cocked her head at me, but said nothing. My fleeting eyes briefly met with Lee's and quickly stared back at the ground, too ashamed of his abrasive words from the previous night to even _stomach_ him.

I heard Gai Sensei clear his throat, and to my delight tore us away from our awkward situation.

"WELL! I am _ELATED_ to find you all in your usual youthful _high_ spirits today! I think Kakashi will agree with me, once he arrives that is, that today is a _perfect_ day to spar with fellow rivals!" he exclaimed happily.

I think I was the only one who could tell his voice was forced. He wasn't happy at _all_.

'_He's probably upset because Sensei is **always** late.'_ I mused, smirking at the thought of my phlegmatic instructor.

"Now, I will choose who your sparing partners will be!" Gai Sensei said in his booming voice.

My blood froze.

"Um…G-Gai Sensei?" I stuttered, trying desperately to make up an excuse to leave.

As long as there was even the _slightest_ chance of getting Lee as my partner, I knew I would rather run three hundred laps if it meant avoiding him.

"Hm? What is it Sakura?" Gai Sensei asked, a hint of worry in his usually cheery voice.

"I-uh…need to run some laps around Kohona…because…because of something that I…that I promised." I muttered.

I soon regretted with a passion what came out of my mouth as soon as I felt Gai's bone crushing arms envelope me in a hug.

"Oh, HOW HAPPY I AM THAT YOU HAVE DECIDED TO FOLLOW MY TEACHINGS! IT LOOKS LIKE THIS NEW PROGRAM **_DID_** WORK!" He shouted for everyone to hear.

"Yeah…okay…let…go…" I pleaded between gasps as I tried to _claw_ him off me.

Gai acted as though he didn't even notice he was suffocating me, just kept going on and on about YOUTH and HARD WORK and PROUDNESS. If these were his teachings, I made a mental promise to abjure them as quickly as I could.

"Gai…what…are you doing?" someone dryly asked behind us.

I turned my head the other way (hearing painful popping sounds coming from my neck.) Upon seeing my rescuer, I thought that I had **_never_** been this happy to see my Sensei come _late_.

And there he was, with that perverted book practically glued to his hand.

"Something I missed?" he asked, stuffing his book in his back pocket and putting his hands nonchalantly inside the pockets of his loose fitting pants.

"Ah. It's GOOD to finally see you KAKASHI! Your wonderful student and I were just conversing about the joys of promises and hard work and determination and YOUTH!" his rival all but exploded with joy.

As soon as I felt his death grip loosen on me, I quickly took the opportunity to escape his torture hug. (I really did think he bruised my ribs if he didn't already break them.)

"Oh." Was his stolid reply as he peered at us with his single lazy eye. As if not caring about what Gai had even said, he walked away and casually leaned against a huge rock. He looked at my teammates with the same interest until he spoke again.

"Shall we begin? You look like such a convivial gathering by the way." He said sarcastically, pointing out our grim attitudes toward each other.

I looked over to see what Sensei had meant by that. Neji was currently shooting glaring daggers at everyone, Tenten held a worried expression, and Naruto could do nothing but stare at everyone, feeling left out from something he knew was important. I didn't even _want_ to look at Sasuke or Lee, but somehow ended up doing just that.

Sasuke scowled when I looked at him and Lee gave me a look of pure antipathy.

'_Could be worse.' _I tried to placate myself.

"Lee…you look…_different_ today…I can't quite put my finger on it." Kakashi added as he pointed at him.

Confused by my Sensei's words I turned again to study Lee.

I think my jaw dropped at the new sight because Naruto motioned with his finger that I had drool over my mouth.

Lee no longer sported his usual green spandex attire. His leg warmers no longer adorned his ankles; his hair no longer possessed the look of a bowl cut.

'_Oh…my…'_

I wanted slap myself for not noticing Lee like this sooner.

His new clothes looked _nothing_ similar to his jumpsuit. He wore some loose black pants (the ones I had often seen him wearing while he was working out) and a beige shirt that was held together by a black belt wrapped tightly around his waist. I tried not to stare when I noticed this shirt revealed his sculpted chest. His hair now no longer had the bobbed style; it was longer…his bangs hung over the top of his eyes giving him the "older face" I heatedly despised. His new look held a _striking_ resemblance to the one he _used_ to have in the photo when he was younger.

I must have gasped for everyone turned to look at me in surprise, _including_ Lee.

"Y-you…" I shut my mouth and refrained from saying 'bastard' at the end of my sentence.

"Something the matter Sakura?" Kakashi asked (though I doubt it was out of concern.)

I quickly shook my head to show that I was fine. "It-it's nothing!" I answered sweetly.

'_Man, I **suck** at lying.' _

Changing the subject, I looked up at Gai Sensei who was currently staring at Lee with a face of hidden disappointment. "Sensei? May I please go do my laps now? I promise I will spar with my…with my uh-_friendly_ _rivals_ when I get back?"

It was a pitiful lie..**hell** it wasn't _even_ a lie, it was a question aimed at myself.

My Sensei, suddenly bereft of his dear favorite student, could only feign a mere smile to for me.

"That is fine Sakura…" he said solemnly.

I took the precious opportunity and sprinted out of the training grounds before my _other_ Sensei could object.

'_Why did that bastard have to change so much!?' _

My mind kept asking me this all while I ran. As if it wasn't horrible enough to have to suffer Lee's personality changing, now the only thing that remained of the dead boy was gone as well. I tried to allay my bitter remorse over Lee as I finally came to a stop, my breathing coming in rapidly, my heart wildly beating.

I realized I had stopped in the middle of a wet dirt road.

'_Perfect…more mud.' _

The bottoms of my shoes were already covered in mud, adding to my hapless day.

'_Oh…well… I might as well…do those laps that I promised that…that **idiot**.' _I thought as I began to stretch my arms. I wasn't about to lie to Gai Sensei…he was a nice person (although a bit bizarre) and the thought of deceiving him was rather harsh.

'_Just because I disappointed myself doesn't mean I have to disappoint other people.' _I reminded myself as I prepared run the laps I had promised Lee.

"I don't even know _why_ I'm doing them…the jerk isn't even here to watch…" I mumbled angrily once I started to jog at a slow pace.

I didn't even remember how many laps I had to do…or if I did, whether I wanted to even _complete_ them. Steadying my speed, I began to feel the burn in my legs.

'_I'm out of shape…stupid ramen…'_

How Lee managed to run hundreds of laps as a _warm up_, was beyond me. Here I was…already running out of breath and I was nowhere _near_ finishing the first couple of laps around the village. All I knew was that if I didn't complete them, I would just be adding my failure to Lee's mordant criticisms. The damp earth clung under my feet, making running a bit more difficult. Small beads of perspiration were already forming and trickling down the side of my face. My throat (as if it wasn't raw enough) stung with pain with each swig of air I took. The sides of my stomach cramped, making breathing a burdensome act.

The early morning sun had begun its slow descent by the time I was about a _quarter_ done with the detested promise. The sweat soaked fabric of my shirt clung to me like a second skin. Stray strands of hair hung over my damp face and made it frustrating to see what was in front of me. I angrily pushed the troublesome wet strands behind my ear and walked tiredly to a tree to find some respite. As I leaned against the tree, I found myself slipping down to the ground to rest under the cool shade. Again, I was amazed at Lee's incredible stamina for being able to run so much and _still_ be able to train.

"How do you DO it?" I asked tiredly to the silent ambience.

"Do what?" came a voice above me.

Despite my worn out state, I quickly got up from the ground. I lifted my head to see a dark figure hiding in the lush leaves and branches of the tall tree.

Black hair, muscular build, arrogant voice.

"Lee…what do you want?" I asked, nettled by his sudden appearance.

"I want to know why you're running…oh, and by the way, I'm _not_ that idiot." Was the brusque reply as Sasuke jumped down from the tree.

"S-Sasuke?" I was a bit stunned by his arrival (and maybe a bit disappointed because it wasn't Lee.)

"Hm, at least _now_ I don't need to ask who you were expecting." He jeered.

My eyes narrowed angrily, shooting death glares at him. "J-just…just drop it all right?" I pleaded, too exhausted to argue with him.

"All right…whatever you say." Sasuke replied, his voice itself mocking me.

I could only roll my eyes; my current heavy breathing stopped me from being able to form enough words. I walked back to the road riddled with puddles and began to stretch my legs.

"Why are you running." His peremptory tone allowed no questions to escape his lips, only statement or orders.

"Because I thought it was _such_ a **_nice sunny_** day, and you _know_ how much I _love_ doing over a hundred laps just for the fun of it!" I said cheerfully, though my voice indicated otherwise.

"You're even starting to _sound_ like Lee…you have to lay off him for a while." He pointed out in that annoying vindictive way of his.

"Shut up Sasuke…I'm not in the mood. Why are you following me around anyway?" I asked, agitated from being interrupted in my training.

"I'm not _following_ you around…Sensei told me to come get you and tell you that training is almost over. Apparently he didn't take it too well that you skipped sparring just to _run_." He remarked.

"It was fine with Gai Sensei…now leave me alone." I said, brushing him off and starting to run.

Sasuke's hand took hold of my own in a firm grip before I even got some distance between us.

"What's wrong?" he asked, showing a rare forbearance despite my dour mood.

I turned back to look at him, eyes warning him to not force me into saying anything.

"N-nothing's wrong."

"You're lying."

"I'm not!"

"Your eyes look glossy from grieving, your voice cracks and stutters whenever you talk, and you are avoiding Lee like the plague. Usually both of you would be engaged in some _'exercise'_ by now." He pointed out, pulling me closer to him. "Did he do something to hurt you? Just answer me that."

"Lee is just a-he's not WORTH talking about! Just please stop bothering me about him!" I yelled bitterly.

I felt no regret over saying this about my crush…about the man I loved. That fact alone frightened me into believing that my feelings for him were perhaps moribund.

Sasuke cocked an eyebrow, his lips pressed together in anger. "That's all I wanted to hear." He said, satisfied. Releasing his hold on me he disappeared in a mysterious puff of smoke, leaving me to ponder over what had just happened.

'_What the hell was **that** about?'_ I wondered, but shrugged the concept aside once I proceeded to run and finish my "promise."

It was _dark_ out…that's all that was offered to me for the time. My cold raspy breaths were visible in the icy night. My sides hurt to the point of tears, my weak legs trembled with each sluggish step I took, my dry mouth begged for water.

I didn't care.

I wanted to-I _needed_ to finish my laps. Now that Lee held no love for me, now that he said he held _nothing_ but rancor towards me, I needed to _at least_ earn his respect. If I couldn't do it by running a few hundred laps around Konoha then I was damned to always be abhorred by him.

My legs wobbled under my weight, which with my exhaustion seemed to feel like hundreds of pounds. I knew I had to keep on going, I needed to persevere much like Lee did, much like _everyone_ did except me. I then noticed that whenever things got too uncontrollable I would often quit (that or miraculously be saved by someone.) Everybody else carried their own weight, while I was nothing but a burden that only held them back. It was no _wonder_ Sasuke never had any interest in me when we were younger; he probably thought I was much too weak (aside from annoying.)

I had to chuckle at my last realization. Sasuke had always seemed like such a **_god_** to me, and then there was Lee, who I dismissed without a second thought. Now thinking back on it, I had to ask myself what _would_ have happened if I had accepted Lee's offer to be his girlfriend. I even stopped to think of what would have happened if I had left a note by those flowers I had given Lee in the hospital. I even went as far as wondering what would have happened if I had kissed him the day I found him by the bridge.

'_I've had so many perfect moments…and I ruined them…I pushed them away from me because I was a fool.' _

Though I tried to keep from crying, persistent tears couldn't help but roll down my cheeks. They trickled down my lips, letting the brackish taste penetrate my mouth. My legs finally gave in as I landed on the ground on my knees. I formed my hands into fists and slammed them on the murky mud, outraged and disappointed at myself for not being able to finish something that meant so much to me.

"DAMN IT! Why can't I DO it!?" I screamed furiously as I continued to punch the ground using what miniscule strength I had left. The mud gushed inside my fists and spurted on my face with each hit I made. "That's IT! I DON'T _CARE_ ANYMORE! I WAS NEVER _MEANT_ TO LOVE! I WAS NEVER MEANT TO **_BE_** LOVED!" I yelled, feeling utterly helpless. "EVERYONE JUST-!….everyone…_hates_ me." I sobbed quietly as I let my tears fall freely into the mud. I couldn't handle it anymore, as much as I disliked it-as much as I _loathed_ it-there was **nothing** I could do to make anyone love me. I had tried to be clingy, I had tried to look beautiful, I had tried…being _myself_. Nothing seemed to work for me when it came to love. It was horrible, it was _unbearable_.

"I-I…I…I _hate_ myself." I whispered as I lowered my head, letting the chilling mud touch my forehead.

As I lay in my grief, I didn't notice a light sound coming my way. I held back my sobs long enough to heard the sloshing of mud as someone came near me. The steps were at first distant, but grew and stopped right in front of me.

"Sakura?"

The voice was soft, worried…sweet.

"GO AWAY!" I screamed, wrapping my arms around myself and not bothering to lift my head. I didn't want to let anyone see my tears, my pain, my _weakness_.

"Sakura…get up…you can't lie down here! What happened? What's _wrong_!?"

Again…that horrid question was directed at me.

"_NOTHING'S_ WRONG OKAY!? NOTHING!" I screamed back, practically burying my face in the mud.

I felt the presence kneel in front of me and wrap their arms around me in a tight embrace.

"Shhh…Sakura…it's okay, whatever's wrong it'll be okay." Came Tenten's soothing voice.

"Tenten…wh-why…why does love…suck?" I asked as her hug tightened around me.

"I…I don't know Sakura." Was her uncertain reply since she wasn't expecting the odd question.

Tenten stayed like that for a few moments, letting me cry to my content. Only when my shaking sobs subsided to short intakes of air and hiccups did she speak again. She lifted me up and looked into my stinging eyes.

"Sakura…what…_happened_?" she asked tentatively, fearful that this would bring me into another fit of tears. Her soothing hand rubbed my back in calming circles and helped deplete my hiccups.

"N-nothing…T-t-tenten." I stammered, stumbling out of her gentle grasp.

She took hold of my arm again before I could fall, letting me rest my weight on her.

"What do you mean _nothing_!? Sakura, this is important so _please_ tell me!" she urged me to speak.

My lips formed no words for her to hear. If there were things that I detested, telling my problems to other people was one of them. I hated to burden people with things that didn't concern them and this was a perfect example. Tenten didn't need to hear this, **_especially_** because it had to do with one of her teammates and friend.

"Sakura…do you want me to walk you home?" she asked calmly.

I gave her a slow nod and started to clumsily walk through the mud.

"It's Lee…isn't it?"

Her innocent question was like hearing glass break.

"N-no…it-it's…it-it's just…it's nothing Tenten…just forget it please." I begged, trying to regain my balance as I continued to walk.

"No I WON'T! Sakura, you're my _friend_!" she exclaimed, but lowered her head sheepishly when she added, "My…_best_ friend…actually."

"Oh, please Tenten…I'm not your best friend. _No one_ likes me…I deserted my _own_ best friend over a stupid boy." I said spitefully.

Tenten shook her head and smiled. "No…you're wrong…I've never really had any girls to be friends with…usually it's just Neji and Lee…and well…I care about you Sakura. You were the _first_ girl to ever hang out with me."

She gave me a friendly pat on the back as we walked (and stumbled) the rest of our way home.

"I-I think…that you're a good friend too Tenten…th-thank you." I admitted as I walked up the steps to my house. The older girl only gave me a half smile and waved good-bye.

She had not taken three steps away from me before I spoke to her again.

"T-tenten? W-would you…would you like to stay here tonight? I've got food." I said, trying to tempt her with the purchases of the previous night.

Tenten let out a soft quiet giggle, nodded, and ran up the steps with me.

"You should really take a shower Sakura…it'll make you feel better." She remarked as she walked inside my house.

I shrugged, not caring how my appearance was. "Yeah…okay. You know where my room is, right? There is like, a _month's_ supply of junk food in the kitchen, and if you need to change clothes, there's some in my room. Just make yourself at home." I said wearily before going up the stairs to my bathroom and closing the door.

Surprisingly, the bath that followed really _DID_ help me feel better.

"Oh, wow! You got double choco-vanilla bluecherry swirl!? You have NO idea how hard it is to find that kind of flavor ice cream in my neighborhood stores!" I heard Tenten squeal in delight as I made my way down the stairs after my much-needed bath.

"Give me one of those, I feel like stuffing my face right about now." I said as I dried my damp hair with a warm towel.

She threw me one of the tiny buckets and followed me into my room.

Once there, the only thing that I wished to do was to dump myself on my unmade bed and forget about my horrible day.

"Sakura…are you read to talk now? I know it may be uncomfortable…but maybe I can help you." Tenten interrupted me before I even had a chance to _touch_ my bed.

I jerked open the lid of the ice cream and proceeded to devour spoonfuls of the sweet frozen treat. "Tenten…I just…I don't like sharing my problems with just anyone."

"But I'm just not _anyone_, I'm your _friend_." She pointed out as she began to eat with a velocity that matched my own. "And," she added, "anything that we say _stays_ between us."

I licked my spoon, closing my eyes in pleasure and savoring the medley of flavors in my mouth before taking another mouthful.

'_If only love was like eating…I'd be a pro at it!' _

"Tenten…w-why did Lee…_change_?" I asked dejectedly.

My friend could only stare at the ground when I asked her this. Her ice cream was left untouched for a moment. "I…I don't know…Sakura…but what happened between the two of you? The two of you wouldn't even _look_ at each other today! You didn't even come to evening training with us!"

"I…I kissed him again Tenten…_so_ many times. It felt **_so_** wonderful…and yet…he told me that he _hated_ me." I mumbled as I ate the last of my ice cream.

Tenten couldn't stop gaping at me.

"You-you guys KISSED!? _AGAIN_!? Why didn't you TELL me!?" she yelled making the glass on my windows nearly shake.

"Well…it just happened…yesterday. _Everything_ happened yesterday Tenten! I _kissed_ Lee yesterday and I told him that I liked him. _Sasuke_ kissed me yesterday and I told him to leave me alone. Yesterday I poured my heart out to Lee and now I feel like such an idiot for it! He…he hates me! He _hates_ me, Tenten!" I cried, falling on my back on my bed. I shut my eyes and placed my arms over them, holding back fresh tears.

"Lee? _Lee_?! **_Lee_** told you that he HATED you? H-how's that even…_possible_!?" Tenten's voice was thick with shock as I felt her weight on the bed.

"And I…I **_hate_** him too Tenten…_so much_! And yet…some stupid feelings still remain." I confessed, opening my watery eyes.

Tenten still looked surprised that Lee could be capable of such an atrocity. Her ice cream might have fallen out of her hands had I not reached over and set the bucket on my dresser.

"Th-that…IDIOT TOLD YOU THAT!?" she yelled, enraged and nearly jumping off the bed.

I was taken back from her unexpected reaction and all but hid behind my covers.

"Sakura, I know that he has gone through some heavy stuff, but that is NO EXCUSE to say that to you! Who does that jerk think he is!? _Sasuke_!?"

"Tenten, just let it go…"

"No I WON'T LET IT GO! Sakura…I say we go to his apartment and knock some sense into him!"

"Tenten…you're overreacting…"

"And _YOU_!? How can _you_ be so apathetic to this!? A few minutes ago you were drowning in your own tears and now you act as if you don't care at all!" Tenten snapped at me.

"I get over things easily…plus…I don't _want_ talk about Lee anymore…can we please just…_change_ the subject?" I supplicated groggily.

Tenten appeared to be crestfallen at my uninterested response but settled back down on the bed.

There was a silence between us, but it wasn't an awkward one that needed to be satiated with words like the ones I had with Lee. This one was comfortable, _wanted_ even, and the only thing that filled our senses was the light chirping of crickets outside my bedroom window. I heard Tenten release a sigh and continue eating her ice cream until there was nothing left of it. When she realized her treat was no more, she quickly bounced off the bed and ran downstairs.

"Hey Tenten!" I yelled, hoping she'd hear me from the kitchen (which I was sure was her destination.)

"Yes!?" she bellowed back.

I heard the frantic tapping of steps up my stairs until she appeared by my room's door, a large bundle of junk food in her arms.

"Do you know how to cut hair?" I asked while snatching what appeared to be a family sized bag of chips from her.

"No, but I used to cut my dog's…it's sorta similar."

"I don't want to look like a _dog_ Tenten…" I said dryly as I munched on several chips.

"Well then, ask your blonde friend. Didn't she help you cut it way back when during the Chunin exams?" Tenten questioned pensively as she opened another bucket of ice cream.

"Yeah…I guess I could ask her….but…I KNOW how Ino is…she'll _want_ to know why and I don't want to lie to her about my promise and-"

"WHAT promise?" Tenten suddenly interrupted me, obviously interested at my unintentional slip up of words.

"N-nothing. I just…I just want to cut my hair for a new change, that's all."

"Oh, _come on_ Sakura! You're such a horrible liar, just tell me!" Tenten couldn't help but shake her head at me for my fabricated reasons.

"It's just a stupid promise that I made to Lee before we…fought. I told him that if I didn't complete the laps Gai Sensei had given him then…I would cut my hair."

"Oh, Sakura that is so sweet!" Tenten squealed, almost forgetting about Lee's fight with me.

"Shut up Tenten…I don't _want_ to get my hair cut!" I exclaimed miserably. My hands wrapped around my long silky hair possessively, not ready to depart from it.

"Then DON'T! Lee's a jerk…he doesn't deserve it…he won't even _notice_!" she pointed out persuasively.

As tempting as it was to follow her advice, I knew that I had made a promise, and as much as I disliked the idea of cutting my hair, I knew that I would keep it.

"It's still a promise…" I stared off into my bedroom mirror in front of me, noticing how funny our images looked. Tenten was now done with her second bucket and unaware of her gluttonous reflection while I held a bag of chips that looked like the size of a _charcoal_ bag.

"Tenten…I…I want to go tomorrow…in the morning. I want to go tomorrow and see Ino…I actually miss her." I stated softly.

"Then we will! I think I heard Gai Sensei talking about Ino's team training with Kurenai's this week!" Tenten answered, unusually enthusiastic.

My new friend made herself comfortable on my bed until she rested beside me on her stomach.

"You know what?" she asked as she placed her arms under her chin to lift her head up.

"What?" There was a hint of interest in my voice.

"I uh-…I'm not trying to sound fickle about you and Lee but…if he really doesn't like you anymore you shouldn't dwell on it. You're pretty and smart…you can find another guy easily!" she said happily, cheering me up almost instantly.

I giggled and playfully threw a small pillow at her face.

"Pretty and smart…YEAH RIGHT! With MY attitude and appetite I'm sure not even Choji would date me!"

"You might never know…I'm starting to see a resemblance between the two of you…" Tenten snickered and hinted at my half empty potato chip bag.

I flicked her forehead and threw one of my _large_ pillows at her.

Barely dodging it, Tenten started to laugh as she thought of something that was apparently…hilarious. "I can just PICTURE the two of you together! He'd be all-OH SAKURA! I LOVE YOU MORE THAN THE STARS, THE SUN, AND BARBECUE, AND CHIPS, AND CAKE, AND-OW!"

It was _my_ turn to laugh when Tenten wasn't fast enough to dodge a flying empty ice cream bucket. I watched in amusement as Tenten rubbed her stinging head.

This, however, didn't stop her from teasing me more.

"OR HOW ABOUT _NARUTO_!? I can just IMAGINE how cute you guys will look!" she nearly guffawed and buried her face in my pillow to avoid any more objects thrown at her.

"Are you JOKING!? He'd be SO _annoying_! He'll be 'BELIEVE IT! Sakura and I are going out, BELIEVE IT! I'm so happy, BELIEVE IT! I can jump for joy and get ramen, BELIEVE IT! Ramen, BELIEVE IT! BELIEVE IT!'" I yelled, mimicking his agitating overused line.

"Well, if you ask me…Naruto is actually pretty good looking-you know-once you get past the odd ramen obsession. It's better than _Sasuke_! That'd jerk probably wouldn't shut up about 'I can't go out tonight because I have to train my _hot_ body to destroy a certain someone! Vengeance makes me so hot! That's why I don't talk much, I'm _SO_ hot that I don't even _need_ to speak!'" Tenten laughed as she made a perfect imitation of Sasuke's brooding voice.

I glared at her until I broke out in laughter as well, knowing well that those were Sasuke's mannerisms.

We laughed, we mocked, we ate, and I don't think I remembered having this much fun even when Ino and I were best friends.

We lay in bed on top of the hills we called blankets and pillows. Our giggles subsided to chuckles, chuckles into snickers, and snickers into the content silence of the night.

"Tenten…what about you? Do you…do you like anyone?" I asked timidly, trying to broach a new subject.

All while untying her buns, Tenten looked at me with a blank face. "Who knows? Stupid Lee keeps on saying that I'll just end up with Neji or something…but I don't think I can honestly date someone who always looks so angry and bitter!" she gave a light laughter, more or less ignoring my question.

I gave her an agitated look and wrinkled my nose. "Well THAT doesn't tell me much…do you like Neji?"

"WHY DOES EVERYONE SAY THAT I LIKE NEJI!?" Tenten yelled all while chuckling in disbelief. "It's so weird to hear that from people. It's like '_Oh wow_, Neji and Tenten are on the same team, they must have _SO_ much in common! They must _love_ each other!'"

I cringed and wrapped a blanket around me, (though I didn't know what kind of protection _that_ would give me.)

"Well…Neji seems to care about you a lot…" I pointed out.

Tenten rolled her chocolate eyes and sighed. "Yeah, so _what_? It doesn't mean that he _loves_ me! What an odd conclusion you have, Sakura."

"All right fine jeeze….I was just asking…"

"Well, now you know." Tenten answered mockingly.

"I'm _glad_ I know."

"I'm glad _you're_ glad to know."

"I'm glad **_you're_** glad to know that **_I'm_** glad to know."

"Well, **_I'm_** glad that **_you're_** glad, that **_I'M_** glad to-JEEZE! JUST FORGET IT! FORGET IT!" Tenten finally finished our petty immature argument.

I laughed and grabbed my alarm clock (thankful that this night I would remember to set it.)

"I wouldn't even bother setting the alarm…" my friend said teasingly.

"Why? YOU may want to be late and be called a lesbian, but **_I_** sure as hell _don't_."

"That's not what I meant stupid! Look at the time first!"

As though still expecting it to be early in the evening I looked at the clock.

And my face fell.

"_TENTEN_! WE DIDN'T EVEN GET ANY _SLEEP_ BECAUSE OF YOU! IT'S ALREADY **_SIX_** IN THE MORNING!"

"Hey! YOU were talking _too_ you know!"

"Oh, be quiet, we have to get ready! I want to be at Ino's house BEFORE practice!" I said exasperatedly as I jumped off my bed and rushed into my cluttered closet for something to wear.

"Wear something you can change out of if you're going to cut your hair!" Tenten reminded.

I smirked and grabbed two changes of clothes.

'_Wait until Lee sees me…I'll be dammed if **he's** the only one who thinks he can change his look!' _


	15. What Can't Be Changed

Hello 'alo! I tried my hardest to update as quickly as I could! (I didn't like the idea of waiting another whole week before I updated.) I just…I just want to thank you guys again and again for all the wonderful and inspiring reviews you send me. I can't _begin_ to explain how they help me. But never hesitate to point out a few things and even recommend stuff to me! (Who knows? I might take your word for it and add it!) For example, someone pointed out that they liked the fact that I did NOT pair up Tenten with Neji (I was TERRIFIED that maybe that idea would be rebuffed!) I'm just SO glad that my story has gotten as far as it has. I have NO idea where this story would be if it weren't for you, the reviewers. Clearly, I do not deserve such flattering reviews! Anyway, I'm sick and I have a fever, but I wanted to update before I passed out on my bed. So…as always…read, enjoy, and recommend!

**What Can't Be Changed**

Tiny specks of light were already forming out the corners of my window as I struggled to put my navy shorts on and Tenten fretted over her long hair. It was six thirty in the morning, we had eaten chips for breakfast, and we were running late.

"Tenten! Hurry UP! We're going to be late!" I yelled as I rushed Tenten out my room just in time to trip on something soft.

I heard Tenten laughing at me as my nose met my _hard_ wooden floor.

"Shut up Tenten…not funny." I growled, though my threat was muffled by the ground. With the help of my friend (who still stifled giggles), I got to my knees to see what the cause of my ungraceful fall was.

It was an oddly familiar blue backpack. To make matters _worse_, my foot had opened the top and a sliver of Lee's green jumpsuit could easily be distinguished.

"Sakura…is that what I think it is." It wasn't a question, it was an anxious statement.

I nodded and stuffed the clothes back inside the backpack, hoping that Tenten wouldn't pursue the subject any further.

If life had taught me _anything_, it was that there was no such luck.

"WHY ARE **_LEE'S_** CLOTHES IN YOUR **BACKPACK**!?" Tenten screamed, acting as though this was the juiciest bit of gossip she was going to hear.

"He…left them here…" I began uneasily.

"You mean…AFTER YOU GUYS HAD HOT STEAMY SE-!"

"SHUT UP TENTEN! YOU'RE _**SO** **PERVERTED**_!" I barked as I flung the backpack over my shoulder and got up from the floor. "I just…he left them here the night before and…when he stormed off he forgot all about them…" I mumbled in a softer tone.

Tenten gave me an understanding look and followed me out the door.

"Do you…do you want _me_ to give it back? I know it will probably be really awkward if you two have to face each other and-" Tenten offered before being cut off as I raised my hand in front of her.

"It's all right…either way I'm going to have to face him sooner or later…I just wished it was later." I said discontentedly.

Tenten nodded and continued to walk with me until we stopped in front of a well-known flower shop.

I half smiled with nostalgia as sweet childhood memories rushed inside my mind. It was difficult to believe Ino and I once frolicked through this very store (with the occasional scolding of her mother.) My hand reached to open the door for Tenten. With a sweet rush of air, the delicate fragrance of flowers and plants filled our senses. The chilling air inside the store to keep the flowers fresh was almost like being inside a refrigerator. I felt Tenten shiver as the door's bell chimed, making a blonde head pop up from behind the cash register. My lips quickly curled into a full-blown smile.

"B-BILLBOARD BROW!?" she stuttered ecstatically.

"INO-PIG!" I yelled, surprised the vases of roses hadn't shattered.

Ino nearly jumped out from the register to envelop me in a tight hug. "How you _been_!? I haven't seen you in such a _long_ time!"

I eagerly hugged back and grinned. "I've been just fine…shouldn't you be going off to practice soon?" I teased.

My blonde friend stuck out her tongue at me and socked me on my shoulder. "I don't have practice for another hour or so…man…that Shino is…._something_ _else_…ANYWAY…what can I help you in!?" she chirped, changing the subject from her rambling thoughts.

I cocked an eyebrow at her odd taste in men, but decided to keep silent about it. "Well...can you do me a HUGE favor? Pretty please!" I begged sweetly and cupped my hands together, knowing Ino would do anything for me.

Ino looked curiously at Tenten, who just lifted her shoulders and shrugged.

"S-sure…what do you need?" she said, hesitating.

"Can you cut my hair again!?" I gave her my best pouting eyes.

Ino looked at me and then at Tenten again, already wondering what we had in mind.

"Why, Sakura, didn't you know? Sasuke only likes girls with LONG silky hair like _mine_! So why would you want to get rid of the ONLY thing that's lovely about you?" she joked.

I scoffed and patted her head condescendingly. "Unlike _you_, I don't rely on just my hair to get guys!"

Ino smirked and led us through the door leading to her house. "So…seriously, why do you want to cut it again? Does Sasuke like girls with _short_ hair now or what?" she asked, a tint of old rivalry in her voice.

I couldn't help but roll my eyes at her. Ino was my friend, but she still vexed me to no end about Sasuke.

"Yes, Ino," I answered back sarcastically, "I'm going to cut my hair short JUST for Sasuke…"

"HA! I _knew_ it!"

"Ino, give it a rest." I grumbled, agitated.

My blonde friend smirked and dragged a stool to the middle of her living room.

"Well?!" she inquired impatiently when I just stared at the stool in front of me.

"What's that for?" I asked stupidly.

Tenten placed her right hand over her mouth to silence a giggle.

"You want me to cut your hair don't you? Then _sit down_." Ino said with a vexed voice that matched my own.

"Oh!" I yelped in surprise as I obediently plopped myself down on the comfortable stool.

It was Ino's turn to look at me as if I was an idiot. She sighed, disappeared into another room, and returned with scissors and a cape to cut my hair.

"Hey, Ino, you remember Tenten right? Her team is training with mine this week." I said casually as I pointed over to my timid looking friend.

A shy quiet "hello" was all Tenten could muster for Ino.

Ino acted as though she hadn't even _heard_ her and absentmindedly nodded her head. "Yeah…the girl in Bushy Brow's team right?" When the mention of Lee left her lips all Tenten and I could do was keep silent and nod, hoping Ino wasn't interested enough to wonder of the abrupt reticence between us.

She wasn't.

"_Anyway_, how do you want your hair Sakura? I was thinking more of a _layered_ look…the look you had before was too even on the sides. Hm, or maybe you want to go for the really short look…you know-like the kind Hinata has! All this time that I've been with her I kinda like how her hair is and-"

"INO! Just…_please_…I don't _care_ about styles so long as you just CUT my hair!" I exclaimed exasperatedly. It was already awful enough that I _knew_ I had to cut my hair…but with Ino it seemed she was just _torturing_ me with the horrid fact.

I felt a sharp tug on my hair as Ino pulled it into a ponytail. "All right jeeze…I'm just trying to help you…" she grumbled as she sprayed my hair with water before commencing the dreaded act.

I couldn't help but shut my eyes as I felt Ino cut my ponytail with one swift snip of the scissors. My bottom lip quivered in anticipation, my hands clutched the sides of the stool until my knuckles turned white. My eyes reluctantly opened again just in time to watch loose strands of pink hair fall aimlessly down the black cape.

Ino glanced at me curiously when she heard me hold back a sob.

"Well…you _wanted_ it cut didn't you? It's your _own_ fault!" she reminded as she continued with the task.

I shrugged, already feeling miserable without my long glossy pink hair.

"But…you do look cuter this way Sakura…" I heard Tenten try to cheer me up.

I gave her a lopsided smile and stared longingly at the pink locks that lay abandoned by my feet. Thoughts about how Lee would react fluttered inside my mind. It was both frightening and exciting to wonder how he would take my new look. Half of my reasoning assured me that Lee would be surprised if not pleased by my look, (the other half felt like he was going to either ignore me or mock me.) I silently prayed it wouldn't be the latter. Feeling my cheeks flush, I thought that maybe Lee would even _compliment_ me on it. Another smile tugged at my lips as I remembered him saying he liked me better with short hair.

"Hey…come on Sakura…what's with that smile? Who's on your mind? Is it _Sasuke_?" Ino taunted in my ear, making sure to accentuate every syllable in my old crush's name.

I scowled at Ino and blew some of my hair in her face. "Quiet Ino-pig."

"So how IS Sasuke?" she added casually as she measured my hair with her fingers and continued to style my hair.

I snorted and held back a snicker. "Like I care…he's fine I guess."

Ino briefly stopped cutting my hair long enough to look at me with a horrified expression.

"What?" I asked, clueless of her chagrin.

She closed her gaping mouth, tightened her hold on the scissors, and continued on her work.

"You've changed Sakura…" she commented as she ran her fingers through my hair, signifying she was finished.

"Funny…that's what Lee said…" I whispered to myself.

Ino gave no mind to my rambling and took off the black cape, shaking it to rid it of my hair. She looked at me, smiled, and gave me an approving nod.

"Tenten's right…you _do_ look cute like that…too bad _Sasuke_ won't care!" She jeered as she pulled the stool away and through the cape over a sofa.

I smirked noticing that her teasing now contained no venom in it. It was almost playful…_almost_.

Tenten nudged me in the arm, motioning with her head to a clock whose time was never on our side.

'_Damn we're going to be late if we don't leave now.' _

"Ino…thank you so much for cutting my hair…but we really have to leave now if we don't want to be late, I'll come by later and-"

Ino waved her hand dismissingly in the air, telling us without words to go on our way.

"It's all right Sakura…just…just come by later and tell me the _real_ reason why you wanted to cut it." She said, knowing me too well to let something like this go unnoticed.

I cringed and lowered my head, fearing that I would have to tell Ino of my humiliation soon. Trying _anything_ to change the subject, I took off my white shirt and placed my usual red attire over my head.

"Um…ever heard of the bathroom Sakura? _Anyway_, you guys should hurry off, I'll just finish cleaning up here and go meet up with my team as well." Ino said as she ushered us out her door and into the busy street. "And you _BETTER_ tell me Billboard Brow!" she added in a sweet tone.

I brushed her off and grumbled something about "Stupid Ino."

"Well…s-she seemed um, n-nice." I heard Tenten stutter behind me. She fumbled with her fingers and stared down on the street, making me think I was looking at Hinata.

"Did you feel _uncomfortable_ with her Tenten? I mean-yeah she's annoying as hell, but she's a really nice friend too." I said, quickly taking her by the arm and leading her through the crowded street filled with carts and people.

Tenten held a nervous and reluctant look in her eye; a maddening blush crept its way to her soft cheeks. "I-I was NOT! It's just that…well…I've _met_ Ino, it's just that I've never really _talked_ to her. I-I was just uneasy, that's all."

"You should hang out with us sometime so you don't feel as shy with her. She's really cool, once you get past the weird Sasuke obsession." I smiled, amazed that Ino still clung to her antediluvian feelings toward Sasuke like a child.

Tenten could only give me a shy nod in return. "O-okay."

I cocked an eyebrow at her unexpected coyness, but continued to walk and pull her with me until we reached the outskirts of the training grounds.

"Hey…Tenten?" I asked, suddenly feeling rather self-conscious.

"Yeah?"

"I'm not trying to fish for compliments or anything…but my…my hair…it doesn't look…_stupid_…does it?"

My friend let out a loud comfortable laugh, alarming me about my appearance.

"Sakura…you really need to be a bit more confident about changes. You look great! I'm sure Lee won't stop gawking at you like an idiot and be rolling around on the ground bawling for forgiveness!" she assured me, making me feel better about my new look.

I laughed with her and began to walk the rest of the way to our meeting place. Though I had only known the _real_ Tenten for less than a week, I felt like I wanted to keep on being her friend even _after_ we stopped seeing each other for training. She had that glow in her eyes that made me want to befriend her and talk to her about my problems. It made me feel _relieved_ even, just the fact that I could confide in her brought a warm smile to my face. This was something that only _Ino_ could do back when we were younger…back when cute boys didn't exist and our worst fear was who would get the first swing during lunch break. My smile broadened, knowing my friendship with Tenten wouldn't go astray for something as silly as a boy.

'_And neither will Ino's…I don't think she even **likes** Sasuke anymore…she's just doing it to tease me for all I know.' _

"HEY SAKURA! HEY TENTEN!"

I knew then that we had reached our destination by the distant (yet booming) sound of Naruto's voice.

Tenten waved back to the group of four men. Funny…I thought there were two more.

We walked towards the group until I came to realize neither Lee nor Sasuke were with us. What puzzled me was that Naruto had a small red scratch by his lower lip. What _further_ puzzled me was the fact that Neji had a lightly bruised purple eye. What _frightened_ me the most was how Gai wasn't his usual cheery self, but with Kakashi being here _early_…that was…just plain _freaky_. I knew something was wrong the moment I had laid eyes on my normally tardy Sensei. Tenten looked worriedly at Neji but said nothing when he glared at her. Naruto looked over at me and gave me a smile that seemed to shoot pain through his stretching lips. It made me feel _sorry_ for him.

"Where's-"

I couldn't even finish the question both Tenten and I wanted to ask. Gai Sensei cut me off with a startling serious tone that chilled my blood before I could even begin. "Before training starts I have to tell you all that we will not be having any training tomorrow. It is…unfortunate…especially because it would be our last day together, but we have received a mission and will be leaving tomorrow morning."

As he finished those abhorred words, I wished that Lee were here so I could slap him.

"Where's Lee and Sasuke?" Tenten voiced my thoughts. Her demanding voice held no room for lies.

"They weren't feeling well today I'm afraid." Kakashi spoke in Gai's place before he could open his mouth. He placed his right hand behind his neck and casually rubbed it. Whether we believed him or not, he didn't seem to care.

I looked over at Gai Sensei to see if he had any sort of reaction.

He didn't.

'_What's **their** deal?' _I thought, cranky from being left out from something important.

My Sensei stretched his arms lazily, making sure to crack his knuckles. "So…what do you want to do today Gai?" he asked, (although I knew he couldn't of cared less if we had all decided to skip training that day.)

"Well..it IS our last day together! Will you not _miss_ my YOUTHFUL students and me my eternal rival?" Gai asked, trying to sound exuberant but failing miserably.

"Like the plague…anyway…I guess I should tell you all what to do today…" grumbled out lazy Sensei, paying no mind to his neglected rival.

"But _Sensei_!" Naruto whined. "There's only _four_ of us today! What are we _supposed_ to do!?"

I could see my Sensei roll his visible eye in agitation. "Well…I guess we'll just have to improvise…right Naruto?" his question held a patronizing tone held just for the blonde.

"Well, yeah Sensei! So what are we going to do today?!" Naruto chirped.

I couldn't help but notice that he was awfully giddy today, even for _him_. It's like his voice had an edge of dread anticipation to it, being cautious of Kakashi Sensei's every word.

"Well…since you guys seemed to be to be so…lively…yesterday, I feel like letting you just run the rest of that energy off." Sensei said before whipping out his trademark book and beginning to read.

'_Ah…to have such a dedicated teacher educating us while reading porn…'_

"RUN IT OFF!? Come **_on_** Kakashi Sensei! I was hoping you'd teach us some _super_ cool new technique or something!"

"Afraid I'm all out of those today." He answered dryly while flipping through the pages of his book.

"BUT-!"

More pages were turned in an attempt to silence Naruto.

"FINE!" screamed Naruto before storming off while muttering something about "stupid Sasuke...busted lip….just 'cause of stupid Lee…stupid Neji…."

Neji crossed his arms over his chest and followed the loud boy.

My eyebrow rose in interest. My…_everyone_ seemed to be in _such_ a good mood today!

I felt sick, I felt nauseous, I felt disgusted…but mostly I felt…_disappointed_. It was as if Lee had let me down, as if he had ignored me once more. If his harsh rejection from before wasn't enough for me to loath him…his absence from today definitely forced me to jettison any surviving affections I had of him. I gritted my teeth in anger, realizing I had practically shredded my hair in vain. Fate really did hate me…and I hated it in return. I hated fate more than mornings and solitude, more than Lee's pain and Sasuke, more than running and anything else on my list.

The only thing I probably hated more than fate was…

'_Lee…'_

And yet…

I knew in my heart that I would cut my hair all over again it if meant getting the old Lee back. Hell-I'd _shave_ my head!

So absorbed and baffled I was in my own thoughts that I didn't even feel Tenten's hand cup my own, tugging my motionless body with her. The last I saw of Sensei, as we disappeared through the lush thick bushes, was his lone figure walking up to talk to a distressed looking Gai.

"What do you think is wrong with Gai Sensei?" I asked purely out of curiosity once we found ourselves on a dirt road.

I turned to face Tenten who merely shrugged.

"Who knows? But I'm willing to bet Neji and Naruto do! Didn't you _see_ them!? I didn't think Neji could **_get_** hurt!" she exclaimed in disbelief.

My attention quickly diverted to the two boys walking a safe distance in front of us. I knew they would answer our questions…one way or another.

"Hey Naruto!" I practically sung out to him, my voice saccharine. Taking the bait, the blonde puff of hair instantly turned around to receive my attention. Neji stopped walking as well, but kept his back facing us.

"That's a pretty nasty cut you got there…how'd you get it?" I asked in mock worry.

Naruto immediately covered his lip with his hand, obviously not wanting me to notice.

"I-I…I can't tell you." He stated dumbly.

I pouted and gave him a concerned look. "Oh? Then at _least_ come here so I can put some ointment on it! I think I have some in my backpack." I offered, making sure to sound helpful.

At this, an ecstatic Naruto practically jumped on me, eager to have me tend to his wounded lip.

That's far from what I had in mind.

"OW! SAKURA! LET GO OF ME!"

"Not until you tell us what happened!" I yelled triumphantly as I used my nails to pinch both sides of his face.

"NEVER!" Naruto yelped.

Pity began to rise for my teammate as I began to dig my nails deeper into his cheeks. I didn't want to resort to such horrible methods for making Naruto talk, but I knew I had no choice if the stubborn idiot wouldn't comply. I looked over at Tenten who seemed about ready to laugh at Naruto's pained expression.

"Just let go of the idiot…why do you want to know so badly anyway? It doesn't concern you."

Neji's cool brusque voice was enough to make me release my hold on Naruto. The poor boy rubbed the sides of his face that had red crescent moons from my nails marked in them. I looked over at Lee's teammate who was currently shooting daggers at me with his pale eyes.

"I want to know because I don't like things being _kept_ from me. So are you going to tell me or am I going to have to give you another purple eye to match?" I threatened, though I knew it was empty intimidation. (I'd be lying face down on the ground twitching in pain before I would be able to lay a hand on the genius.)

The said Hyuuga prodigy continued to glare at me, his eyes deadly slits. "Why'd you cut your hair?" he said with a knowing smirk.

I scoffed and folded my arms over my chest. "It's called '_style_,' you'd know what it was if you didn't have _stupidly long hair_!"

If I wanted to be known for something before I died, I wanted to be known as the woman who made Neji's right eye twitch in fury and mouth gape in shock. I heard Naruto hold back a snicker before being socked in the ribs by a tense Tenten.

Neji gave me a stern look, breaking out from his usually stoic features. His lips turned into a thin line of hidden irritation that seemed oddly familiar to me. My hands, which had unconsciously curled into fists, had started to tremble in alarm. My eyes, which pierced confidently into Neji's, had started to waver. The tall man in front of me looked as though he wanted nothing more than to ignore me…belittle me…_loath_ me. That look he held…it was just like Lee's.

"Neji…please, can you tell us?" I asked, taking a softer more beseeching tone.

"Did Lee get hurt?" Tenten spoke again when Neji seemed reluctant to answer.

He turned to Naruto, who was occupied in soothing his maltreated face but seemed more eager to speak.

My unusually quiet teammate turned to us as he rubbed his cheek and sighed. "When Tenten went out to find you…Sasuke came back…he seemed angry for some reason. He went up to Lee who was practicing his kicks on a tree. He…he must've gotten Lee off guard because he landed a HUGE punch on his face! YOU SHOULD'VE SEEN 'EM!" Naruto all but yelled now.

Odd…despite our somber moods, only a person like Naruto could find some hilarity over the matter.

He wrapped his arms around his stomach, trying to hold down a fit of laughter that was sure to follow. "Then the idiot got his ass _kicked_! I've _NEVER_ seen Lee hit Sasuke like that since the _Chuunin_ Exams! What was even FUNNIER was that Sensei was too shocked to do anything about it! Can you imagine Kakashi Sensei…_SHOCKED_!? Gai Sensei just had his mouth OPEN the _WHOLE_ time! YOU SHOULD'VE BEEN THERE! A-and th-then….a-and then…" He started to crack up, but pointed at a glaring Neji and continued nonetheless, "th-then s-stupid Ne-neji here…was the first to react and tried to be '_cool_!' He grabbed Lee from behind and ended up getting PUNCHED in the eye!"

"I wasn't using _any_ of my strength you idiot! I-I thought Lee would calm down and come to his senses once I got a hold of him!" Neji tried to excuse this embarrassing thought.

This only made Naruto laugh even harder.

"He made you kiss the floor Neji! You can't tell me that's NOT funny!" He said as he continued to guffaw like the idiot he was.

"Oh? But what about _you_?" he asked, a hint of amusement caught in his eyes.

This…made Naruto freeze for some reason.

Neji turned to me with a smug smirk. "You teammate here…tried to help me by holding Sasuke down. The idiot got kicked in the mouth."

"NEJI! WE PROMISED!" screamed a betrayed looking Naruto.

"Promised what? That you'd _tell_ them what happened to me?" Neji asked nonchalantly.

"Th-that's _different_! At least you didn't get KICKED!"

"_How_ is it different? We _both_ let our guards down." He stated flatly.

"Th-that's not what I meant! What I meant was that-!"

"So what happened afterwards?" I asked, completely ignoring Naruto's outbursts.

"Well…after I got pushed off and Naruto met the ground…we were hoping that at least _one_ of our Senseis would do something."

"And they DIDN'T DO A SINGLE THING! The jerks just kept on staring at us like they were _surprised_ or something!"

"Well…_I_ was surprised too. That _was_ the first time I had ever seen Lee _wrestle_ with someone in the dirt…usually he's poised and accepts challenges formally…"

"But this time Lee just _WENT FOR IT_!" Naruto in short, finished Neji's words.

I was sure I was gawking like an idiot at the two boys in front of me, too numb from what they were saying. Neji could only continue to frown at the laughing blonde (who thought this whole concept was somehow _comical_.) Tenten looked at me in apprehension, unsure of my reaction.

"What happened then?" I asked, wanting to find out who the victor of the brawl had been.

"Well…by the time Gai Sensei snapped out of it, Lee and Sasuke were caked in dirt from the fighting. He finally got to separate them but…the thing that confused the most about Lee was…he wasn't even fighting _properly_. It was like watching a drunken fist fight…it was just…"

"_Ugly_." Naruto finished for Neji once more with a laugh. "It was weird seeing Sasuke fight like that…on the ground that is."

"So…Gai Sensei broke up the fight right? I mean-no one got _seriously_ hurt did they?" I importuned them while trying to assure myself.

"Well…I _guess_ you can say that. Aside from a few bruises and cuts both of them were fine, just panting and glaring at each other." My teammate answered, his laughter finally subsiding to chuckles.

I looked at Naruto, wondering if I should believe him or not. For some odd reason I felt a tint of insincerity in his voice, hoping that I would not note it. To me the fight between Sasuke and Lee was more than some hilarious brawl (even though it would probably make me laugh once the shock wore off.) I couldn't help but feel…_responsible_ for this. The whole reason why Sasuke decided to approach Lee was because I had to open my stupid mouth and blurt out something I hadn't meant. Now because of me, two of my teammates were hurt. Even though I felt some sort of twisted satisfaction in knowing Lee had gotten punched, it meant nothing if it meant he still detested me even more. Lee didn't deserve it…he didn't deserve anything that cruel.

'_Maybe **I'm** the one who deserves to get punched.' _

I had to go see Lee…_now_.

I didn't care if we were in the middle of practice, I didn't care if he was infuriated with me, I didn't even care if he would slam his door on my face. All I _did_ care about was finding him and telling him that I was sorry for putting him through this, sorry for ever meeting him, sorry for ever making him spend time with me, sorry for ever kissing him…sorry for…

…_ever loving him._

The truculent realization made a dry lump form inside my throat, a lump that wouldn't descend no matter how much I swallowed. Bitter pungent tears threatened to stream down my face, but I did not allow it. If was going to cry in front of _anybody_, I decided I'd rather have it be in front of Lee. My hopes had already reached the nadir of disparity and the reconciliation of my relationship with him seemed impossible. At least now, he wouldn't think he was the only one who felt anger…_shame_…and spite.

I felt it too…

And it was _eating_ at me.

I would wait no more with this agony.

Giving Tenten a vicious glance that warned her not to follow me, I sprinted past my teammates…all while tightly clutching the sides of my blue backpack. How Lee would react, I did not care; all I cared about was being able to see him before he went off to his mission. With the way that bastard had been treating me I figured he owed me that much.

My rapid heartbeat echoed in my ears, making my ragged breaths and sharp intakes of air a difficult task. The cramping in my legs and stomach was painful and almost unbearable, but I did not wish to stop running. I would not stop running until I was facing Lee's door, lifting a confident hand to knock on it. Then…then I would tell him…spill my heart out to him and wait for him to trample on it, wait for him to spit on it. The tips of my lips curled into a sardonic smile when I realized I was running to a place where there was no affection waiting for me, just callous remarks. It was obvious that Lee would just refuse me again, but why was I in such a hurry to make it happen so quickly?

'_Why am I so eager to get a broken heart again?' _

I nearly tripped over the seemingly endless stairs on the way up to his apartment. My heavy steps echoed across each step as I clung to the walls surrounding the spiral stairs.

"Why does he…why does he have to live so high up?" I muttered all while trying to catch my breath.

Even while facing imminent rejection I still had the gall to complain. I smirked, and with the miniscule strength my wobbling legs could give me, I made my way to his door.

And I found myself waiting in front of it as though expecting it to open by itself.

I bit my lower lip in anticipation, unsure of what to do. My hand, which I had imagined to be so confident and august as I knocked, was trembling by my side. Leaning my forehead against his door, I began to ruminate over my choices. My warm shallow breaths eventually subsided and returned to normal, my legs regained a bit of strength, but my mind remained drained and restless as ever. Trying to lift my hand to knock on someone's door had never been this difficult for me.

'_It's facing who's **behind** this door that's difficult.' _

I gulped, making my raw throat ache, and without realizing, (and in an attempt to make up my mind,) loudly _banged_ my head against his door.

'_Oh…hell…no…'_

Before I had the time to even react and step away, the door swung open, letting my body come crashing (unceremoniously) into a familiar masculine chest.

"Sa-SAKURA?" Lee's surprised voice was heard over my horror-struck shriek.

My head landed on the left side of his chest, allowing me to hear his quickened heartbeat. I stammered out a foolish "sorry" before I pushed Lee off me and staggered away from him.

"Sa-Sakura…a-are you…all right?" he asked, his eyes blinking repeatedly in alarm.

Staring at Lee's chest like an idiot, I started to wonder how he got it to be so muscular of all things. I tried to hide my scarlet face in vain at my adulterated thoughts.

'_Staring at the **floor** at this point wouldn't do me any good…' _

"I-I'm…I-I'm…good…how about you?" I asked stupidly.

I could already feel Lee's eyes penetrating me.

"Why are you here?" His voice was calm, but virulent.

I finally lifted my eyes to meet Lee's unforgiving face.

"T-to…to gi-give you your clothes back…y-you left….them at my house…the other…day." It seemed the longer I stared at him, the smaller and weaker my voice became.

My voice, however, soon became loud when I noticed the state his face was. A rather large bruise outlined his cheekbone and dry red cracks on his lips indicated someone had punched him.

I didn't know whether to laugh or to cry…

But I held back both urges.

"Uh…wow…Sasuke _really_ did a number on you huh?" I joked (though I knew this was hardly the time to do such an immature thing.)

Lee cocked an eyebrow at me, (probably wondering what medication I had taken that morning.)

"Yes…though if you think _I_ look a bit ruffled, you should see your _dear_ Sasuke…I am afraid I might have been a bit rough on the poor idiot." He spat out icily.

I was taken back by his callous remark, but not angered.

"You shouldn't have fought back…you should've just let Gai or Kakashi handle it…" I pointed out as I continued to stare in fascination at his bruise.

'_Sasuke must've been **furious**.' _

Despite the fact that Lee hadn't seem too delighted in seeing me, I couldn't help but feel some sympathy for him. It wasn't my place to tell people the problems between him and me. It wasn't my place to even _be_ at Lee's door like the needy girl I was years ago. Now because of my babbling, both Sasuke and Lee were hurt and disgusted with my actions. I sighed and mentally nodded to myself when I knew I would have no problem accepting rejection from Lee once more; after all, it was well deserved.

"By the time Gai stepped in, Sasuke and I were getting _tired_." Lee replied with diminutive interest. He pushed me behind the threshold and was about to slam the door in my face before something made him stop. His eyes wavered in a mélange of shock and horror, his face turned pale save for the vivid bruise. Something…something was wrong with him.

"Sa-Sakura? Y-you…wh-what…the…the-your HAIR! What happened to your _hair_?" he finally stuttered out in surprise. "You…you actually cut it?"

I twirled a short strand of hair between my fingers and shyly nodded. "Yeah…you…you were right Lee…you were right…I _couldn't_ run those laps." I confessed softly.

Lee continued to gawk at me with the same amazement I held for his bruise.

"Y-yes…b-but I did not…did not think you were _serious_!" he exclaimed as he further examined my new look.

I shrugged, trying to make it seem like it wasn't important to me. "Well…I made a promise…didn't I? I said I would keep it."

He gave me a sweet and innocent look that whet my fading feelings for him, one that almost made me want to reach out to his face and kiss it. His eyes fell to the ground in regret, making him appear like an uncertain child.

"Yes…I-I suppose you did." He concurred.

Before he had a chance to compose himself, I flung the backpack into my arms and dug around until I found his green jumpsuit with his headband.

"Here…you forgot these…" I mumbled as I shoved his clothes against his chest.

Lee took the headband but shoved his clothes back to me. "I do not need them anymore." He simply said.

I blinked several times, wondering if I had heard wrong, and offered him his clothes again. "Change out of that stupid getup you have…stop fooling around…" I advised, feigning ignorance.

The man in front of me rejected the attire for a second time. "I do not need it." He repeated succinctly.

"Lee! Just please change into them! Didn't you see that Gai Sensei looked really hurt when he saw you in those clothes?" I beseeched while holding the clothes against his chest with both my hands.

"I do not care. I do no want them." He stated, his hands making no effort to accept the jumpsuit.

"Come on Lee! Stop it! Think of how Gai Sensei will continue to feel if he-"

"Gai is a fool." Lee's hostile sharp voice shut me up.

I gasped, not being able to (or not _wanting_) to believe what he had said about his beloved teacher.

"Gai Sensei isn't a fool Lee! How **_dare_** you say something like that about the only person who once believed in you!?" I yelled as I gave up and threw Lee's clothes in his face.

He remained fixed by his door and let his belongings drop to his feet.

"Lee! You're going on a mission tomorrow! You have to dress and get ready! Why won't you wear it!? WHY?!" I screamed in his face. "JUST CHANGE! CHANGE LEE! CHANGE BACK TO HOW YOU WERE AND-"

"I do not _WISH_ to change Sakura! I am sick of it! _SICK_! I AM _SICK_ OF GAI, I AM _SICK_ OF MY TEAM, I AM _SICK_ OF **_YOU_**!" he shouted back with a voice that formed tears in my eyes.

"STOP IT LEE! JUST STOP IT! You…you don't know what you're saying." I said helplessly. "Y-your…your teammates and Sensei care about you Lee! I…I care about you too! I…no…I take it back Lee…it's more than caring about you…I think I might lov-"

I was silenced once again…but not by Lee's abrasive voice.

He held his thumb against my lips, his index finger under my chin.

"Please…do not say anything you will regret when I am no longer here." Lee supplicated calmly.

His words struck something in my chest, making it feel constricted and bringing back painful memories from last night.

I angrily pulled away from his bandaged hand and glared at him.

"Lee…you're selfish….you're so selfish!" I yelled, feeling tears stream shamelessly down my face.

"Well…that makes two of us…" he said indifferently as he retreated into his dark apartment.

He turned around to give me a brief glance. "You can come in…if you want…there is something I want to show you anyway."

Despite my mind's refusal, my feet obeyed Lee and followed him into his gloomy hallway, making sure to walk over his once cherished jumpsuit. I stayed behind him until we entered his room and stopped. The pictures that I had once been prying to see were strewn on his wooden floor, adding to the eerie ambiance of the dark room. Lee flipped a switch and the room was quickly flooded in light, making me raise my hand over my eyes in agitation. A familiar burnt photo of the young woman with long black hair was the first thing I saw when my vision adjusted to the brightness of the room. I kneeled in front of it and gingerly touched it, feeling the charred corners with the tips of my fingers.

"My father burnt that picture you know." I heard Lee say in a detached manner.

"What? Lee…when-"

"My mother died giving birth to me…my father would always tell me the only reason he did not kill me before I took my first breath was because I was a born a boy. If I had been a girl…I would not have been so lucky." He continued bitterly, completely ignoring my attempts to talk to him.

"Lee…why are you telling me this?" I asked, my voice cracking with my tears.

"You wanted to know did you not? I am merely telling you something you wanted to hear."

"No…Lee…not like this…"

"In my culture it is said that if the mother dies while giving birth then the baby is considered to be bad luck…needless to say, my brothers _hated_ me. To make matters worse…I could muster no chakra in the academy.…that only gave my father and brothers one more reason to think I was worthless. I…I trained hard and late into the night…anything to avoid their wrath at home. My low grades did nothing for me except receive sneers from my classmates, curses from my brothers, and more hatred from my father. When…when I finally _did_ become a genin…I thought my father would be so…_so_ proud…I thought he would grow to even…love me. I remember…I remember he would always let any of my brothers join him on missions…I would…I would always beg to go with him…but the damn bastard beat me each time I asked. He…he would say 'Why take along a burden? Why take trash?' One by one, my brothers died while on missions…until only I was left. I was almost…._happy_….in knowing that now my father would have no _choice_ but to take me if he ever wanted a companion on his missions. But he…he never asked." He took a break from his story, allowing me to imbibe what I had heard.

He kneeled in front of me and studied the picture of his mother. "I always wanted to know what she was like…my mother. Every time I asked, my father would ignore me and tell me it was none of my business. Every _damn_ time…until one night...I snuck into his room while my last living brother and him were on a mission. I found…an old photo album under his bed and I…I set some wood by the fire and I…saw my mother for the first time…I was so happy Sakura." He bit his quivering lower lip in an attempt to keep his voice from breaking.

I smiled and picked up the picture. "She's the most beautiful woman I've seen Lee…I'm…I'm sure she loved you." I said, trying to soothe him.

He scoffed, regaining control and pushing away any chances for tears. "Love…what an empty word. Coincidentally, as I was flipping through the pages…my father came back from the mission and caught me before I could hide the pictures. He…screamed at me and threw the photos into the fire. I remember…I remember begging him to stop until my throat became raw and I lost my voice. I remember…pleading him not to burn them…to at least give me one. He struck my head, grasped my hand, and shoved it into the hot coals of the fire. I do not…I do not even remember if it hurt…I do not _wish_ to remember the pain…all I remember was grabbing the first picture in the midst of the flames, trying to salvage it."

I cupped my hand over my mouth, in utter horror of what Lee had told me. "Lee…I…I…"

"Not all my scars are from training Sakura…I thought I should let you know that." He said as he took the picture away from me.

My mouth opened to speak, but I could form no words.

Lee had taken them away from me.

"Years after the incident…I saw my father packing up…h-he said…he said he was going out for a mission, but somehow…somehow I did not believe him. I felt like he was leaving me…my mother and brothers were dead so…there was no reason for him to stay. I knew that it would only be a matter of time before he left. Like the idiot that I was…I asked him to take me along with him…I promised that I would be a strong son and…not let him down. My father…he…he laughed, he said he would kill me before I would accompany him. He told me he _had_ no sons left. I begged again to not be left alone and that is when…when he beat me…I suppose. I do not remember it very well because he struck my head to the point where I blacked out. All I _do_ remember…is falling down on something wet. That is when I realized…he had forsaken me, disowned me, and abandoned me. Did…did Tenten ever tell you about the day I did not attend training?" Lee asked, aware of my attempts to pry into his private life.

I nodded slowly, still too stunned from what he was telling me. Part of me wanted to reach out to him and embrace his body…the other…wanted to scream to silence his macabre story. This…this was not like Lee at all. I wanted the _old_ Lee back; I didn't care much for this grown and reserved man kneeling in front of me. I wanted the little boy…the little boy I had met so long ago who took spontaneous poses and hugged his beloved Sensei. Not this…this _man_. He was nothing, he was motionless…he was _dead_.

"About a day or so later…Gai sent Neji to my house to look for me…he told me he found me unconscious and lying face down on a puddle of my own blood. I…I woke up a week later in the hospital. Well…I recovered…but I…I did not want to train…I lost interest in talking, in eating…I did not wish to _live_. My teammates first started to notice a change in my behavior when I took a liking in taking foolish risks that nearly took my life during missions. I would…never hesitate to be used as bait…to be used as a decoy…I _enjoyed_ it…in a twisted sense. I was never worth anything so it was not a predicament if I died right? But…damn Neji…I _hate_ him so much. I still do…I do not wish to ever forgive him for what he did. It was…it was during one of our missions…I do not care to remember which one. It was a simple kunai…one that any decent ninja could dodge…and yet…when one of the enemy ninja threw it at me…I could not-_no_-I did not _wish_ to move! I _wanted_ to stay in that spot, I _wanted_ that kunai to pierce my heart, I _wanted_ to die…I _prayed_ for it. I _still_ hope Neji goes to hell for stepping in and pushing me out the way…that dammed idiot, I hope he rots and burns in-"

"DON'T SAY THAT!" I screamed, finally finding my voice. "Neji saved you because he _loves_ you Lee! So do Gai Sensei and Tenten! They _care_ about you so much! You don't…you don't even realize how much! If Neji had not saved you, you would have _died_ Lee! Is that _REALLY_ what you would have wanted? IS IT!?" I finished breathlessly, barely able to contain my wrath.

"What difference would it have made?! Neji did not save me because he _cared_ for me! He saved me merely because he HAD to! I am his _teammate_! That is was teammates _do_!" he spat out as he threw the picture on the ground.

"It made all the difference Lee! If you had died!...If you had died I…I would not have seen you again…you're so selfish Lee, did you ever stop to think how this would affect other people!? How it would affect ME!? Lee, if you had died I wouldn't have spent time with you, I wouldn't have such fun with you, I wouldn't have kissed you! I don't regret any of it now Lee! I'm _glad_ I kissed you! Lee, I lo-"

"I do not _CARE_ what you have to say Sakura! Say it to Sasuke! Say it to Neji or Naruto! Say it for someone who is WORTH IT! But do _not_…do not say it to me…" Lee interrupted my heated confession once more with his abrupt lack of sympathy.

"But Lee…you ARE worth it! Why do you have to belittle yourself so much! Why do you have to beat yourself up over this! Stop it!" I pleaded earnestly in vain.

"_Stop it_!? How can I _stop it_!? How would _you_ feel if suddenly you were not allowed to be taken on missions!? When I was diagnosed with depression that is what happened to me! I was not even allowed to live _alone_ anymore because of my suicidal actions! I had to be taken under someone else's care like a child! Do you _know_ how hard it is to live with someone you _hate_!? DO YOU!?" he seethed.

I cringed under his bellicose voice, wanting desperately for him to calm down. I held my hands against my ears, trying to shut him out.

"SHUT UP LEE! All these people! All these people ever wanted for you was your well-being! They wanted to save you, to keep you _alive_! And you're too much of a fool to notice that!" I yelled as I lowered my head to hide my sobbing.

"SAVE IT SAKURA! That is a bunch of lies! I am _worth_ NOTHING! I _am_ NOTHING!"

"You are _EVERYTHING_ to me Lee!" I screamed back, sending him into a dead silence. "What happened to the Lee I _used_ to know!? The one who was kind and warm to me!? The one who would sacrifice himself for someone without a second thought!? The one who befriended me and saved my life!? The one who I…the one who I…" I could no longer find the strength to finish my mawkish rambling; I did not want to get my heart trampled. I could only continue to cry like a needy girl and not care what Lee thought of my hysterics.

"The one you…what? Say it Sakura. Say it all." Lee all but forced the words out of me as he roughly lifted my chin with the tip of his finger. "Say the whole damn thing."

My heart beat furiously inside me, threatening to burst through my ribcage. The beat was so blatant I swore even Lee could hear it.

"The one I…the one I fell in love with." I finished, exhausted.

At this, Lee's hand let go of my face and lifelessly fell to his side. His mouth was open in disbelief, his lips parting with a few shallow breaths.

I waited in anxious fear for his reply.

It never came.

Instead, Lee stood up and walked to his open drawers, rummaging in them for something. He walked back to me and placed it in my hand.

"Wh-what's this?" I asked weakly, noticing it was a key.

"That is the key to my apartment…even though this mission might take several weeks or months, I do not plan on coming back." He answered evenly.

"Wh-what!? Lee what are you planning on doing?" I inquired, suddenly alarmed by his clandestine motives.

"I…I enlightened you with what caused me to change because I hate you enough to know. I made a promise…that if I ever wanted to punish myself…I would do the vilest and most revolting thing I could think of…and that was telling you this story." He explained scathingly, wanting me to feel the sting with each syllable in his words.

"I…Lee I…it doesn't change a thing…"

"You wanted to know what happened to that little love sick boy you used to love, did you not?" he asked icily.

I looked up to face bitter remorseless black eyes. Though I was on my knees, my legs began to tremble, adding to my tension.

"He died Sakura…he died a long time ago." He said tersely, giving me a new reason to mourn.

It seemed like every fiber of muscle in my body shook when he said this. It felt like my eyes had no more tears to shed…I was tired, drained, _exhausted_ from fighting with him.

"Then…then my heart died with him." I replied, lifting my numb body up from the floor and walking out his room.

I didn't even bother to look back to see if he followed me out the door. I didn't even bother to close his front door as I exited out his apartment. I didn't bother to _care_ as I walked back to the training grounds.

Lee was dead…and so was I.


	16. Impetuous Quarrels

Hello 'alo! I apologize for the late update, but I no longer want to give you guys excuses. Since the last chapter I've been feeling kind of…blegh. I KNOW how I want the story to progress, I KNOW how I want it to _end_…but somehow I just can't put it into paper. It's not writer's block (I'll be dammed if it is.) But I can't figure out what it _is_! I CAN'T say it's practice or school because I've been doing that for _years_. I have NO idea what is making me write so crappy or so choppy all of a sudden. I feel like the characters lack élan perhaps…or maybe I'm not capturing their attitudes well enough. In any case, I apologize if my LAST chapter was a bit…flat. I just don't want to be THAT author who is content with her work but then sucks all of a sudden. I don't want to be THAT author who "takes a break" because she can't write worth a damn. I _hate_ it. But anyway, I'll be dammed if I ever let this drag me down! I will keep on working and hopefully I'll get over it. I will try and update faster now, because I feel bad about waiting so long. Anywho, I really hope you read, enjoy, and recommend!

**Impetuous Quarrels**

My steps were sluggish and heavy as I made my long way back to the training grounds, back to my teammates, back to more questions…back to askance glances. It was enough to make me want to go home and sulk in bed, never wanting to get out. The tears that had once been trickling copiously down my face had long been dry; my mind no longer thinking Lee was worth them. I felt myself sigh, but it wasn't in relief or in exhaustion. It felt more like a sigh bracing me to face the onslaught of stares and glares I would surely get from everyone upon my sullen return. Shuddering at the thought, I slowed my pace, trying to kill time or to even think up a lie to cover for my sudden departure.

'_Maybe I **should** just go home…there's nothing friendly waiting for me…' _

The mental suggestion seemed enticing to me, and yet my legs refused to turn in the direction of my house. I took it as a sign of surrender and sighed once more.

It was much too early to be distressed like this.

I bit my lower lip, the effects of Lee's apartment starting to wear off, and continued to walk. My fingers tentatively played with the key he had given me, popping the shiny metal into the palm of one hand and then the other. I shrugged my shoulders uncomfortably and tried to push off creeping thoughts of _why_ Lee would give me such a thing in the first place. Unless the idiot was planning to kill himself, I saw no real motive for this odd gift. In any case, I planned to question Gai Sensei about his "prized pupil's" behavior and _carefully_ advise him to take him off the mission. Even if Lee hated me for it in the end, even if he never talked to me, even if he tried to _kill_ me…I knew I still loved him enough to save his life. I didn't care if _he_ thought it was insignificant.

To me it was the world.

Tenten waved to me in the distance, still in the same spot where I had left. Her expression was one of concern; I could see it even from where I was. Naruto and Neji also waited, obviously irritated and confused from my abrupt exit. My mind was torn between choosing to run away from it all or having to face them. I licked my cracked dry lips and gulped, feeling the aridity in my throat.

"How'd it go?" she asked in a low whisper.

Before I had realized it, I had closed the gap between us. I was currently facing Tenten. My throat went even drier, adding to my discomfiture.

"Lee…Tenten please-you've got to watch out for him when you guys go on your mission…I think…I think he's planning something." I said tonelessly, not even bothering to answer her question.

Tenten examined me with a look of confusion, my sudden warning probably making no sense to her. She knitted her eyebrows together, placed her hands on both my shoulders, and continued to question me once more.

"Sakura…what are you talking about? What's Lee going to do?"

I shook my head, not fully aware of him myself. "I…I don't know, but I think it's better if he doesn't go on the mission with you guys…something…something might happen." I whispered almost low enough for not even me to hear.

She looked at me with a stunned face, wanting to know more. "Something…like what?"

"He might try and kill himself for one thing…it's happened before so…"

"NEJI! Don't say that! Th-that…that was an _accident_! He-that kunai was too far away from him to see! Lee…he-I heard it from him myself!" Tenten stuttered, wanting to silence her teammate's macabre comments.

Both Naruto and I looked at each other, startled by his words as well.

"Then he lied." Neji answered her evenly, not even showing the slightest hint of care in his stern face.

I turned to face him, no longer wanting to bicker with him, but to warn him once more of Lee's behavior.

"You know too Neji! You _know_ what Lee intends to do! We should go talk to Gai Sensei about this, he might-"

"**Don't**. Talk like you understand what's going on." He interrupted, his voice venom.

My eyes blinked rapidly, trying to process what he had said to me. My heart beat wildly against my chest, wanting desperately to cease. It felt worse than Lee's as I listened to it close to my ear when we crashed. The deep throbbing echoed and continued as I tried to come up with something witty to retort, but thought of nothing. Bursting into fresh tears was the first thing proposed by my mind (which was probably currently delirious.) Then I was tempted to run away like a defeated coward. I clenched my hands into fists as my brain finally kicked in and told me I was supposed to be _enraged_.

"Of _course_ I understand what's going on Neji!" I hissed back, equally venomous. "He _told_ me! He told me everything! I know _everything_ that is going on!"

His pale eyes pierced my own, trying to belittle me as he often did whenever it concerned Lee.

"You know nothing. **Stop**…acting like you know him." He ordered as he took a few intimidating steps closer to me, his eerie gaze making me want to back away from him.

I firmly kept my stance (and my control) and leaned closer to him, showing him I was not frightened by his petty (however terrifying white glares.)

He smirked…and whether it was from amusement, acknowledgment, or pity I did not know. If anyone else would have seen us they would have thought we were about to kiss, since our faces were inches apart. It was far from it, considering our lips would do nothing but spew verbal poison at each other.

"What are you guys _talking_ about? What's up with Bushy Brow?" Naruto spontaneously jumped into our heated conversation.

Our eyes twitched furiously as Neji and I briefly turned to face Naruto. We gave him our best menacing looks and quickly silenced him.

It was not long before we gave our attention back to each other and resumed our steady death glares.

"So he told you, didn't he?" Neji asked almost derisively. He scoffed and closed his eyes, releasing me from his scrutiny if only for a moment. "You must feel so proud of yourself." He added icily, showing me those penetrating white orbs once more.

My mouth opened to protest, to scream at him that it was not true, to tell him I felt _horrible_ for making Lee break under my prying and questions. It opened…but no words formed. A mere coarse whimper took my confident voice's place. I clamped my mouth shut and refused to look at Neji. He simply continued to smirk, already knowing he had won our dispute. It made me realize again how much he reminded me of Lee, (not his kindness-just the pompous attitude he had whenever something did not go his way.) I cleared my throat and mind, assuring myself that I would not let Neji patronize me.

"I didn't _force_ him to tell me if that's what you mean." I retorted calmly.

"Of course not…he simply _felt_ like telling you." He said as though I were lying.

I bit my lower lip, not quite knowing how to respond. Had I tried to help, or had I just been pressuring Lee? Was it because I truly cared for him…or because I wanted to satisfy my own morbid curiosity? Questions exuded from my mind, questions I did not want to face or had no way of answering. I shook my head. NO-Neji couldn't make me doubt myself-not now. Lee was my _friend_-he always had been. If I had no interest in Lee, I would have never tried to help him, never tried to befriend him or even love him. Neji had no right to judge me-he barely knew me himself!

"True…" I began slowly, choosing my words wisely. "I may have pressured Lee sometime or another…but I would NEVER hurt him Neji. You know that. Whatever Lee told me…he told me on his own will."

"Oh, Sakura be sensible for once! You _forced_ Lee into telling you, you _forced_ him…to break!" Neji castigated me, filling each syllable with spite.

"You can say or think whatever you want Neji…I couldn't care less about it."

"Just like you couldn't care less about Lee when-"

"OKAY! Neji, Sakura! That's enough!" Tenten interrupted his heated diatribe before it could burst.

"NO! Let him finish it!" I yelled, preparing myself for Neji's volatile statement. I wanted to hear it, only then would I know why he always glared at me whenever I was with Lee.

Neji looked searchingly at me, knowing well he irritated me and loving it. "Your little team has been so annoying Sakura…ever since this stupid program started, you guys have caused my team a great deal of trouble."

"Well that IS true-I mean if Sasuke would have-"

"Naruto just…shut up!" I exclaimed furiously at my loud teammate who seemed to have a habit of interrupting.

I looked back at Neji, trying fervently not to let his smug smirk and lofty eyes get the best of me.

"You really should keep quiet Naruto…my quarrel is not with you." He warned, his threats never empty ones.

"If you're fighting with one of my friends then the _hell_ it isn't!" Naruto shouted back.

Neji scoffed and folded his arms over his chest, _emanating_ his superiority. "Well…in any case, I couldn't care less about you guys. This will be our last day together and soon I won't have to deal with _any_ of you."

"Same goes for us then!" Naruto snapped back at him.

The Hyuuga prodigy had already turned his back to us, walking away as though we weren't worth his time. Tenten looked at Neji's retreating form and then at us, trying to decide if she should stay.

"Tenten…come. We need to pack and rest for the mission." Neji called, already making the choice for her.

I shrugged and smiled at her, my movements telling her I did not mind if she left. She smiled back and started to walk toward Neji, but ran back to give me a warm embrace. I tightened the hug, both of us aware we wouldn't see each other for a while.

"Don't worry…Neji and I will protect Lee." She whispered reassuringly into my ear before darting back to her waiting teammate.

I couldn't help but not feel at ease despite her best efforts to consolidate me. The way Lee was now…even if Neji _did_ care for him I did not think it would matter. Lee had killed himself off, shunning his heart and friends away from him. He had thrown away all kindness and happiness, not even leaving some for anyone-not even his Sensei. If Neji was planning to save Lee, I knew he had better be willing to risk the success of the mission. He had better be willing risk his _life_. Judging from Lee's attitude, he looked like he was willing to bring down _anyone_ who got in his way. Shuddering at the light breeze and a tapping on my shoulder, I turned around to see Naruto beside me.

"You okay?" he asked, his tone and face with a rarely seen solemnity.

I nodded shakily and smiled.

"Yeah…jeeze Naruto, I'm such an idiot sometimes."

The odd statement wasn't meant to be rectified or cajoled by Naruto. I wasn't fishing for compliments, I was merely saying the truth.

"Well…you _were_ just trying to help out your friend. I think…I think Neji cares for Lee just as much as you do…it's just that his concern is harder to show." He pointed out, making me change my mind about the touchy pale-eyed boy.

'_Maybe he's not such a hardass after all. I trust him…I hate him, but I trust him. He'll take care of Lee…I-I'm sure.' _

I breathed in something resembling relief, now a bit confident about Lee's safety if Neji was near him.

"Hey…Sakura?" Naruto's usually loud voice now rivaled the meekness of Hinata's.

"Hm?" I gave my attention to him.

His azure eyes shifted under my gaze, hesitant about whatever he was planning to say.

"Do you…do you like Lee? I'm sorry, I don't mean to pry-it's just that I heard Sasuke mutter something about it when he was rolling around in the ground with him."

Naruto's question made my body freeze, whether I reacted like this because it concerned my feelings toward Lee or because he had mentioned Sasuke I did not know. I bit my lower lip again, pondering on the various answers and lies I could give him. He was my _friend_, he deserved the truth, but I was also aware of his feelings toward me, however immature they seemed at times. The wilting tips of his lips soon grew into a smile, a smile that appeared genuine. A feeling of self-pity and regret swelled within me when I wished I had liked Naruto instead of Lee or Sasuke. He would have never hurt me as they had. If anything, Naruto would have been the least likely to leave me or break my heart. He was too damn nice for that.

"Sakura? Sakura. Sakura! Hey, you all right? You just kind of zoned out! Do you really like Lee that much!?" Naruto tore me from my thoughts with his all too familiar vociferous tone.

"I'm…I'm fine Naruto. It's just that…wow, your question kind of threw me off guard!" I said, giving him a nervous laugh.

There was a slight pause between us after my uncomfortable giggling subsided.

"_Well_?" he asked impatiently.

"Well what?"

"_Do_ you?"

"Do what?"

"Like him!"

"Like who?"

"Sakura! Be _serious_ with me! Do. You. _Like_. Lee?!" Naruto all but exploded. (I could tell if I didn't tell him soon he'd start whining like child.)

Any and all possibilities for affection toward him were depleted as he reminded me why I didn't like him as a lover.

(He was almost as annoying as I was.)

"So what if I do?" I blurted out, regret evident in me.

Naruto's eyes grew wide, filled with a mix of surprise and mirth. His mouth opened, ready to express his chagrin.

"You DO!? SAKURA! When-how'd-when did _THIS_ happen!?" he screamed and nearly burst my eardrums.

Funny…he was taking it rather well. (I had half expected him to pass out or something.)

I placed my index finger underneath my chin and looked up at the sky in a contemplative manner. This of course was just to make Naruto think I had liked Lee for a long time rather than a mere _week_.

"_That_ long huh?" Naruto questioned dejectedly. He stretched his arms out and casually folded them behind his head. "Ah well…least you're happy right? I mean-it's not like Sasuke and you had anything going-"

"How IS Sasuke by the way? The way you and Lee sounded make it seem like he went home crying after the fight or something."

"Now THAT…would have been funny too!" Naruto exclaimed laughing, already getting over the stunned shock of my feelings for Lee. "You _really_ should have been there…it's the kind of thing you laugh about even YEARS after it's happened!"

I grinned, wanting to see Sasuke in this beaten state of all things. "Yeah…too bad I wasn't there." I added, wanting to change the subject.

He nodded his head and laughed a bit more at the memory still fresh in his mind.

"You know what Sakura?"

"What?" I asked, my eyes perking up in interest.

"I feel like you haven't been happy these past few days…so I'll cheer you up! Let's go out right now, who _cares_ about practice? Let's ditch!" He whispered excitedly, cautious not to yell the last part of his offer.

I was shocked at his plan, too terrified to even fathom what our Sensei would do if he caught us. "B-but-!"

"Neji and Tenten did it! Why can't _we_ do the same thing too!? Come on! I'll buy you ramen-my treat! Then we can go over to Sasuke's place and wake him up! You HAVE to see him Sakura! I think it will cheer _both_ of you up!"

I was hesitant at first, (seeing as how Sasuke would NOT be happy to see me) but didn't have a choice in the matter as Naruto grabbed my hand and lead me out of the dirt road.

The sun, whose light had once shone vibrantly, was now in the midst of a twilight giving way to night as we walked back to the village. Villagers were beginning to put up their stands, eager for their business to start. There was the ambience of frivolity as I heard people conversing and laughing, ready for their nightly festivities. My stomach growled with the smell of barbecue and ramen already thick in the air…tantalizing me. Everything dazed and tempted me as Naruto dragged me through deep crowds of people, all wanting to get to one place or another. I rubbed my eyes to adjust to the bright streetlights and allowed my teammate to take me where he wished. He was rather pleasant, often stopping by stands to offer me dumplings and other sweets (which I awkwardly turned down.)

"What do you want to eat Sakura?" his simple question seemed to puzzle me.

"Didn't you say you wanted to eat some ramen?" I asked with a raised eyebrow.

Naruto shyly turned his head to the side and scratched his head. "Well yeah, I love ramen…but tonight I want to eat whatever _you_ want Sakura."

I smiled at his childlike honesty and kindness. It really _was_ a pity I was in love with Lee.

"I…well in that case I feel like having a huge steaming bowl at Ichiraku's." I said warmly, easily giving in to what my teammate wanted.

His face brightened as he returned my smile and pulled me to the stand (which _conveniently_ was right behind us.)

"If you insist!" he exclaimed, ready to comply at a chance to eat his favorite food.

We sat down and waited, not quite knowing what to do next.

Naruto seemed to be playing with an imaginary piece of lint while I focused on my boiling ramen as though it were the most interesting thing I had ever seen. I was nervous…nervous for whatever questions were sure to come. As much as I trusted Naruto, I didn't think I'd be able to calmly tell him what Lee had done without breaking into sobs. Pain was something I did not wanted to be reminded of, I simply wanted to eat with my friend, smile, and pretend as if my heart had never been broken.

"So…Sakura…"

Of course nothing I wanted _ever_ came true.

"Y-yeah?" I responded nervously, fidgeting with my hands before I placed them on my lap.

"How…why…_when_ did you start liking Lee?" He asked as steaming bowls of ramen were served in front of us.

Thankful for the distraction, I grabbed a pair of chopsticks and began to ate, ignoring the pain of a burnt tongue as I hastily slurped down the noodles.

"Sakura…" Naruto whined, but copied my actions.

"Why do you want to know so _badly_?"

It was still a sore subject for me; I didn't want to open my wounds when they weren't even scars yet.

"Just…just curious I guess."

I sighed and played with my ramen, poking at the pieces of meat. This conversation was inevitable so long as awkward silences would exist.

"Well…at first…at first I didn't like him…it's only been a few days you see." I confessed, shying away from my new feelings.

Naruto simply nodded, giving both the ramen and me equal attention. He stopped to nibble on an onion as he thought of what to say.

"Does he like you too?" he asked after swallowing a couple mouthfuls of his food.

I shrugged, not wanting to remember the shame I had felt when he had rejected me. "I…don't know. When I kissed him…h-he seemed confused as though…almost as though he didn't have a straight answer for anything. Naruto, you're a guy right? Why do-"

I stopped in the middle of my sentence when I noticed the look on Naruto's face. Several strands of noodle hung from his open lips, his eyes bulging out, his chopsticks floating aimlessly in his bowl.

"You…KISSED Bushy Brow?!" he screamed loud enough to make half the people in the stand cover their ears and the other half to drop their bowls.

Cringing from the fatal glares and shattering sounds of dishware, I lowered my head, trying _anything_ to pretend I did not know the boisterous boy next to me.

"_Quiet_ Naruto! I don't want the _whole_ village to know!" I whispered angrily all while giving his hair a sharp jerk.

I ended up with a painful yelp from Naruto and numerous curious glances from the public.

'_Going home to bury myself in my bed sheets sounds so tempting all of a sudden.' _

"All right…fine!" Naruto hissed back, rubbing his mistreated head (it seemed I had been abusing him more than usual lately.) Once his pain and disconcertion had diminished, he settled back into his stool, fidgeting uncomfortably under my gaze. He appeared as though he still wasn't satisfied with the trifling things I had revealed about my feelings toward Lee.

"What is it?" I asked, a bit harassed by his sudden inquisitiveness.

He shifted his head to look at his hands, which were currently playing with his chopsticks, and he released a shaky sigh. His eyes held no expression, save for a rarely seen glint of what I thought was insecurity. I was expecting his usual audacious questions, rude remarks, or even a perverted comment…but nothing left his lips. My legs began to quiver, and I did not know whether it was the weather or Naruto's doing.

"Well I…Sakura how much do you like him?" he asked plaintively, his eyes never leaving his hands. Slight embarrassment tainted his cheeks, forcing me to understand this was difficult for him to say.

I did not know what to answer.

Amused by his diffident mood, my mind pondered over answers, all lacking subtlety. I could muster only a few incoherent words, but gave no inkling as to how I honestly felt. My eyebrows knitted in confusion…it seemed I found it difficult to say my words as well.

"It-it's all right…you know…I understand if you don't want to tell me. I just…" Naruto's tone grew dim with each word.

"Just what?" I asked, suddenly finding my voice at the chance to know something more about him.

"Just that…ever since you got over Sasuke…I was hoping…" he looked tempted to finish his thoughts, but decided against it when his eyes met my own for a moment. "No-never mind…forget it Sakura. I-I was just blabbering…so tell me! What did Lee say after you guys kissed?"

I was taken back, deprived of Naruto's opinion, but did not bother to coerce him to say anything more. Instead, I was left with the pungent (and still fresh) memory of Lee's rejection. It all but drove me back to my anguish, making me regret ever touching the fool's sweet lips.

"Th-that's just it…he didn't _say_ anything." I mumbled, humiliation staining my face.

"Did he look at you like an idiot when you pulled away?" he asked, his voice now taking an interested tone.

"Maybe-I don't know." I said uneasily.

"Did he stutter stuff out like he was drunk?"

"…Yes…"

"Or was he completely speechless?"

"He _was_ unusually silent afterward." I pointed out.

Naruto's lips spread into a grin, one that seemed to be holding something back from me.

Then he laughed. The bastard laughed…AT ME.

"Why are you asking me these things? What _difference_ does it make? It doesn't change the fact that Lee was probably disgusted with the kiss!" I retorted, too frustrated to even pull at his hair anymore.

Naruto's laughter was comfortable and genuine, one he only used when something was indeed comical. He stopped and patted my crimson cheek.

"I hate to break it to you but…Lee probably enjoyed the kiss as much as you did!" he exclaimed, making a glimmer of happiness flutter in my beaten heart.

"He…_what_? That's…oh, Naruto-you're a horrible liar!" I cried, still thinking this was all just some cruel fabrication.

"You can say whatever you want, but it's obvious the idiot liked it." He said as he shrugged, knowing well I would eventually (maybe inevitably) believe him.

I was not convinced; I was not ready to have false hopes so soon. No matter how ingenuous Naruto looked, no matter how _kind_ his words were, I couldn't bring myself to believe him. There was just no way…

"Besides," he added with another dazzling smile, "_any_ guy would be speechless after kissing a girl, especially if that girl was you."

Naruto's compliments flattered me to the point where it made me wish I had fallen in love with _him_ instead of two heartless men. My heart beat frenetically, my stomach fluttered, my cheeks _burned_! Oh, if only…

"That or maybe he just felt sorry for you, I could be wrong!" he joked, probably thinking I'd have a hearty laugh.

If only he'd shut up.

My mawkish moment was completely ruined, insuperable despite my best efforts to reawaken it. At that moment I decided it was better to think of Naruto as a brother (he was much too intolerable for anything else in my opinion.) I sighed, but smiled at the comfort and advice he had given me. Naruto would always be Naruto…

…and I wouldn't have it any other way.

He smiled back, left a wad of money by our bowls (I doubt he even realized how much it was) and grabbed my hand.

"Let's go see Sasuke." He said, elated that I was somewhat back to my regular self.

I gladly followed him out into the busy streets filled with people. There was a bit of anxiety about meeting the gloomier of my two teammates, but I was grateful that I would get to see him. Half of me _also_ wanted to be a witness to his bruises so I could have a nice laugh with Naruto the next time we brought it up with Kakashi Sensei. Even though I knew I'd get upset over the beating he received, I _also_ knew the anger would eventually fade away and we'd learn to find _some_ mirth over the matter. The mere _thought_ of seeing Sasuke with a black eye, however, was sufficient to rouse many stifled giggles from me.

Naruto gave me a puzzled look, but said nothing when he heard my immoderate suppressed laughter. We stopped only to pick up "Sasuke's favorite food" as Naruto put it and bought some umeboshi and instant cups of ramen. He handed me a plastic bag filled with the food and we continued to walk the rest of the way to Sasuke's apartment. Aside from slight laughter and badinage, neither one of us dared to bring up Lee again.

"OPEN UP _SUNSHINE_!" hollered Naruto as he banged loudly (and repeatedly) on Sasuke's door once we arrived.

I kicked him in the shin, warning him not to provoke our moody teammate.

"He's not going to open if you keep screaming like that Naruto!" I whispered, hoping Sasuke wasn't close to the door.

I realized I was bereft of luck when the door flung open to reveal Sasuke casting us a stony glare. His hair was unruly and unkempt, looking as though he had just gotten out of bed. It didn't seem far from the truth considering all he wore was a black shirt and pants. He held an indignant pose, making sure to cross his arms over his chest to accentuate his bitter mood. It made Naruto give him a reproachful look and made me try to conceal myself behind the blonde, failing miserably in the process.

"WHAT…is it?" he asked, his voice lethal.

Naruto cleared his throat, trying to fill our silence. "Well, we uh…we uh…that is we…" was all he could stammer.

"We brought you some dinner!" I chirped, violently knocking over Naruto's head with the plastic bag satiated with food.

"Y-yeah! Dinner!" my friend concurred, nodding like an idiot.

I was about to question his clothes before his face caught my immediate attention. A light giggle threatened to escape my mouth upon inspecting his condition. Tightly pressing my lips together was all I could do to keep the laughter from exploding inside me. Sasuke's black eye twitched in irritation, further stressing the ordeal of keeping my laughter silent. His lips, which I had so fervently wished to kiss when I was young, were now slightly bruised but abundantly ripped. Thin crimson lines could be seen around his face, oddly resembling nail marks. A trail of bruises was clearly visible on his bare arms, giving me a fine view of Lee's work. The last thing I managed to see was a bump on the right side of his cheek that made his face appear chubbier. In short: he looked like he had _tripped_ down several flights of stairs and the only thing that cushioned his fall was a concrete floor with broken glass spread over it..

I choked back a chortle, but released it as soon as I saw Naruto giving me a grin and look that said 'I _told_ you you'd laugh.'

"Shut up Sakura!" Sasuke practically commaded.

I paid no mind and burst out laughing with Naruto. It had been the first time in a while that Sasuke had gotten a beating and I intended to enjoy it rather than cry about it at this point.

"Sa-Sa-Sasuke!" I exclaimed between a hurl of giggles, "Y-you look…Na-Naruto WAS right! You look like _CRAP_!" I couldn't even control my balance as I leaned on Naruto's chest to save me from falling on the ground.

"NARUTO!" Sasuke seethed at the boy trying to hold me up. "What did you _tell_ her!?"

"Relax Sasuke! It's not like we told _everyone_ you got in a bar fight with Lee!" he joked, making me explode into another fit of uncontrollable giggles.

"That bastard just got _lucky_ you idiot! I was just pretending! Y-you don't think he would actually _beat_ me do you!?" he professed with a haughty voice.

"Th-that was some pretty _damn_ good acting then!" replied Naruto, showing no signs of respite from his snickers. "I mean-that blood looked SO real! How'd you _do_ it!?"

Apparently, Sasuke had gotten sick of our sarcasm and looked ready to slam the door in our faces.

Instead…he stepped aside and waited for us to calm down.

"If you're going to stand there and laugh like idiots you might as well come in." he said tersely, walking away from his door.

Both Naruto and I looked at each other, wondering _why_ we hadn't gotten broken noses from a slammed door yet, but took Sasuke's offer. I placed his food on a nearby table and stood in front of the raven-haired boy, unsure of what to say now that my amusement had subsided. He inspected me with indecorous eyes that seemed to know my every move, my every flinch, my every _breath_. It made me wish Lee was here so I would not fear his eyes.

"Sakura…" his voice was the antithesis of his harsh stare. It was somewhat soft, a tone I noticed he reserved only for me.

As if to make my solitude and feeling of helplessness _worse_, Naruto went off into Sasuke's hallway yelling about needing to use the bathroom.

He left us alone.

He left _me_ alone.

"You can relax…you look as if I'm going to do something to you." Sasuke seemed to read my thoughts as he motioned at a chair for me to sit.

I readily accepted and sat down, feeling like I was being interrogated.

He sat beside me and placed his hands together, his back hunched over as though he were thinking.

"You…really like Lee…don't you?" came the unexpected question.

I tried to ignore Sasuke's omniscient words but they remained in my mind, echoing.

"I…I…well yes, I guess I do." I admitted, seeing how feigned ignorance of the matter would not work.

"More than Naruto? More than me?" Several _more_ unexpected questions were thrown at me.

I sighed when I realized I could provide no answers that would please him.

"I love you guys _too_ Sasuke! Just not-!..." I stopped, not being able to voice the rest. It was horrible having to be earnest; it was _unbearable_ having to be honest.

"Just not _that_ way?" Sasuke finished for me tonelessly.

I could only nod, my face filled with unmitigated embarrassment.

"Even after what he did to you?"

"I didn't even _tell_ you what he did to me!"

"He made you cry, that's reason enough to kick his ass."

"Don't be a hypocrite Sasuke. _You_ made me cry at some point too."

"That may be true, but at least I'm trying to rectify my mistakes."

"Don't try to sound so noble, you're doing a horrible job at it."

Sasuke got up from his seat, crestfallen or disgusted with my reaction. I did not know which he felt more strongly. He walked over to stare out his window, the village's lights and sounds barely in the distance. A dry chuckle reached my ears, making me turn to look at him.

"You've changed…Sakura." He stated, a hint of discontent lingering in his voice.

"I have not changed Sasuke…I've merely grown up. We all have to someday." I replied, finally feeling confident in what I said.

"Grown up you say? How so?" he asked, obviously taken back by my sudden change in tone.

My lips trembled, but I cast my childish fear aside and continued. "I've grown out of being the weakest member of the group, I've _grown_ out of stupid rivalries with friends, I've _grown_ out being so helpless, but most importantly…I've grown out of…silly crushes." The last confession took some difficulty and temerity to say, but I would no longer cower from Sasuke's truculent eyes. I was sick of it.

The boy who I had once loved walked away from the window after loudly shutting it close. He took a few steps toward me, but stopped when he realized I was scooting my chair away from him. The intensity of his stare lessened somewhat after he stood motionless in front of me for a few moments.

"Sakura…you're not the only one who grew up." He said in his usual deadpan voice.

"You haven't grown up Sasuke-not one bit. You're still stuck in your childish world thinking no one but _you_ has changed, still thinking that everyone _feels_ and _acts_ the same as they did ages ago." I retorted viciously through clenched teeth.

"Sakura, is there any way-"

"NO. There _isn't_." I snapped back, his forlorn question already predictable to me. "Even if…even if I no longer loved Lee I still…no-I _still_ would not _dare_ be with you. There's no way…I can ever feel as I did when I was a child. Maybe…maybe if I desperately wanted to punish myself for my selfishness…for what I did to Lee. If I ever wanted to do the most vile and cruel thing to myself I could think of…then yes, I'd be with you. But not now…not now." Once I had finished I felt my breaths deepened. My eyes and throat stung persistently, not allowing me to accept any more conversations with poise. I wanted to go home, I no longer wanted to be in this place that felt so desolate of warmth and love.

Before my mind had time to focus on what I was doing, I realized I had risen from my seat, ready to leave. As if waiting for his cue, Naruto came back from his prolonged bathroom break and stood beside me.

"Good bye Sasuke." I muttered with all the dignity I could muster and walked towards the door.

Naruto followed behind me, but stopped to flash Sasuke a smile and give him a fake punch to the injured side of his cheek. The morose boy returned the smile in the form of a smirk and closed the door behind us.

'_He'll get over it…he has a bunch of girls always drooling over him so I'm sure he'll make a **full** recovery.' _I rolled my eyes at the thought of an ecstatic mob of girls chasing him across the village in a matter of _days_.

Naruto and I walked in silence, our footsteps being the only sound between the two of us as we walked through empty streets. Oddly enough, it did not irritate or distress me. It was not _that_ kind of silence, the kind that drove hostility and discomfort between people as it often did whenever Lee and I were alone. I actually found that the lack of noises and chatter _placated_ me. Anything was more relaxing than having to discuss my moribund love life.

'_It seems like that's what everybody wants to talk about.' _

We reached the steps of my house and I slowly opened the door, wanting something more than this simple departure.

"Naruto…thank you." I said, not quite knowing how to show my unmitigated gratitude toward my friend.

The boy waved it off as though it were nothing and gave me a smile that seemed almost wistful. He was about to turn around, but stopped midway, as though regretting something.

"Hey…Sakura?" he asked softly.

"Hm?"

Without warning, Naruto reached for my waist and tightly wrapped his arms around me, surprising both of us. His warm cheek caressed my own as the impact of the hug buried me closer to him. My febrile face felt like a piece of burning coal as he leaned into my ear.

"Sakura...be strong." Was all he whispered.

I stared at him with bewildered eyes, not being able to process his brief words. Naruto eventually pushed himself away, but not before giving me a kiss on my forehead. He completely let go of our embrace and allowed me to release a breath I did not know I was holding. Suddenly lightheaded and speechless, I could only watch as he walked away from me.

"See ya tomorrow Sakura!" he yelled, not bothering to look back.

I nodded, even though I knew Naruto couldn't see it, and entered my home.

'_Be strong.' _

I would have to be, that is, if I ever wanted to face Lee again _if_ and when he returned.


	17. Crucial Obligations

Hello 'alo! I would like to _deeply_ thank all those who reviewed! It really makes my day! Okay, this has _officially_ been the longest I've taken to update, but I have a good reason! I didn't want to _write_ crap and then have you guys have to _read_ it, so I just kept on deleting various versions of this chapter until I finally got it right. I'm glad to know that what I had wasn't writer's block, (I guess it was just too much stress.) But aside from working on this story, I also took the time to relax and take it easy (it works wonders.) That and a nice drive around town with your friends while listening to your favorite music works just as well. ADVICE: NEVER put too much on your plate! It sucks and you'll end up with headaches, worries, and mood swings. Anyway, aside from feeling refreshed, I also feel wonderful! (Maybe because it's so close to Valentine's Day!) My flagline team is selling flower bouquets this week at school and business is SWEET! The money may not be for me, but I'm just so happy to know that we might just have enough left over to go to Disneyland or Sixflags! Also, I've been reading a LOT of drama in my AP class and I kinda added a quote from 'Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead' (if you can guess it, extra credit for you!) lol Well…I've said this sixteen times so I'll say it again: Read, Enjoy, and Recommend! And THANK YOU! Without your reviews, I don't know what would've stopped me from discontinuing my story!

**Crucial Obligations**

The air around me was thick with dread as I lolled lazily on my bed. Random rays of sunlight poked through my window, making me want to pull the covers over my head to shun them from my eyes. I pulled my knees underneath my chin and tried to ignore the incessant chirping of birds. The sun was fast approaching and I knew simple blankets would not keep it from rising. My alarm clock had been beeping, urging me out of bed, and I would not comply. It made me want to do nothing more than ram the alarm through the window and hit the birds. I fought the tempting urge and recoiled back into bed. The cursed clock had been beeping at me for the past half hour…nagging at me…

And I did not care.

'_That teacher of mine will get angry at me…and she's not **nearly** as understanding as Kakashi Sensei.' _

I groaned in irritation, knowing I had to drag myself out of the house eventually if I did not want the Hokage infuriated with me.

_Why_ had I asked Tsunade to be her student and follow her teachings?

'_So I wouldn't be a burden and always be begging for help.' _

I released a bitter groggy laugh.

It seemed each day I had to remind myself.

I lamentably rose from bed and rubbed my eyes with my palms, still not used to the harsh light that escaped through the cracks on my curtains. My body had not properly rested; I could still feel my muscles ache under my weight as I slipped out of my warm blankets. It had been another predictable sleepless night…and it would most likely be another somnolent morning once I got to my teacher's office. Tsunade-sama would probably not be pleased with me once she found out I had not slept this night (the mere thought of it made my fatigued body cringe.) Life really hated me…

And I had stopped caring to hate it back.

I sucked it up, showered, got dressed, and while being careful not to rouse my mother from her sleep, quietly made my way down the stairs. It was much too early to train for anything, much MUCH too early. Not being able to overlook the incessant growling of my stomach, I grabbed my bento lunch (and with one last glance at my reflection in a mirror,) headed out the door.

The arid summer winds that stroked my face carried a blithe and almost carefree aura as I hurried to the Hokage's office. After months of training under Tsunade, I knew better than to give her silly excuses if I was late. If I did, she'd probably make me take over all the check ups of her patients. Not that I couldn't handle a few check ups and wounded ninja, (I just didn't want to be bothered for the fifth time that week with an angry Ino after one of her missions.)

'_I wonder what else Tsunade's going to teach me today…I've already gotten most of the healing spells memorized.' _

I inwardly sighed, knowing that what I had learned yesterday was a paltry amount compared to what I _still_ had to study. Tsunade would have many more techniques to teach me today, techniques that I would surely lose sleep over because I had to master them. I shuddered, the first time I had attempted a healing jutsu had not been a pleasant experience for me. My hands throbbed with pain each time I had to accumulate chakra in them. At first I panicked, thinking the pain would never go away, but calmed down after it receded with time and practice. Naruto told me he had had similar problems while learning a move from Jiraiya so I didn't worry. (If the idiot could handle a little pain then so could I.)

Before finally making my way to Tsunade-sama's office, I waved at random "good mornings" from people I hardly even knew. They were mostly medical ninja from the hospital and none I cared to personally know.

I never bothered to know anyone now.

"Sakura, you're _late_."

"I'm sorry Tsunade-sama, it seems I got lost on the road to life this morning…" I grumbled, not being in the mood for a lecture. My teacher sat behind her desk, her blonde hair barely visible over massive stacks of paperwork.

"Sakura, only Kakashi is allowed to use that excuse and it's a horrible one at that." She replied with a bored tone. I flinched when I heard her brutally stamp a paper. "What am I going to do with you?"

I shrugged, closed the door behind me, and scooted up a chair in front of her desk.

"I'll make it up to you with a nice bottle of sake." I said sweetly, earning a smirk from my instructor as she looked up from the piles of paper.

"You were always a smart one. Anyway, did you complete what I asked you to do yesterday?" she asked as she handed me a load of papers to sort for her.

"Well, Sasuke wasn't _too_ keen on the idea of using him for a jutsu without even _asking_ him first, but the swelling and vomiting finally decreased." I answered triumphantly.

Tsuande briefly stopped reading a paper, cocked an eyebrow at me, and continued with her business. "Well…that's the _last_ time I ask you to do a _healing_ jutsu on a simple kunai cut." She muttered.

"Oh, come on Tsunade-sama! You KNOW I can handle stuff like that! It's just that he was bugging me and-"

"Your personal relationship with a patient must _never_ interfere with the task at hand Sakura." She calmly reprimanded, giving me a stern look.

I shut my mouth and quickly nodded, completely subservient to her commands out of fear of her wrath.

"Now then," she began as she set her work aside, "Now that you're done with your boyfriend's check up' I want you to check on my patients in the hospital today, I have too much work to do here."

The side of my lip twitched in annoyance for her biting request. I was obviously not pleased with how she described Sasuke, but I tried to hide it. No matter how much I resented her imperious attitude, no matter how much her orders peeved me, I knew this was all part of my training if I wanted to keep being her apprentice. I sighed, nodded in defeat, and made my way to the door.

"Oh, and Sakura?" she asked casually before my fingertips could even touch the doorknob.

I froze in my steps, but didn't turn around to face her.

"Y-yes?"

"While you are at the hospital…there's some paperwork waiting for me-all from the recent progress of current ninja reconnoiter and retrieval missions-you know, that kind of stuff. I'd like for you to bring it to me when you come back from your appointments."

Again, I nodded my head like the obedient little pupil that I was and headed outside to the comfort of the scorching summer sun.

'_I hate getting so nervous whenever she talks about those stupid mission papers.' _

I shuddered despite the high temperature and started to walk in the direction of Konoha's hospital. It seemed I still could not escape the ignominy of my feelings for Lee ever after all this time. The distress was always there-that stinging sensation in my chest, that dryness in my throat, that alacrity in my heart, whenever Tsunade-sama brought up ninja missions or _casually_ mentioned on "how risky" Team Gai's mission was.

I often wondered how she found out about the…_fiasco_ between team seven and Gai's.

'_Stupid Naruto probably spilled out everything to her.' _

He had probably been bribed, no doubt, with promises of ramen and "important" missions from Tsunade. The mere concept was enough to make me pull Naruto's hair in fury the next time I saw him.

Tsunade _knew_ I hated getting the assignment letters, letters that informed the village of a team's condition during their mission. It would have been bearable had the stacks of letters only included progress, but not _fatalities_. She made me read and summarize the countless death rates and injuries that were reported _along_ with the progress the team made, regardless of the impact it would have on me. At first, I thought she _enjoyed_ the dread and fear that filled my eyes whenever she asked for the letters…

But of course a Hokage could never do anything so sadistic.

(Then again, with Tsunade, one could never be too sure.)

I hurried my pace as my anxiety grew and I found myself wanting to read the letters. It _was_ after all…the only way I knew how Lee was doing.

Every month I secretly thanked my teacher for allowing me to be the one to review the letters. Through all the anxiety, through all the restless nights and soporific afternoons, I found some appeasement in knowing Gai's team was faring well. I could not describe how utterly relieved and elated I felt each time Lee's name did not appear on the fatalities list. It made my hostility toward Neji lighten a bit, just knowing he was probably helping Tenten and Gai Sensei take care of him in all the months they had been gone.

'_It's already summer…they've been gone for a while now.' _I thought somberly. Anxious days had turned into forlorn weeks and forlorn weeks had turned into bearable months. Not even the seasons waited for them. The bitter arctic weather had given way to spring, spring to summer, and yet there was still no return from them. My pain, of course, was still there, but it held no animosity toward Lee.

In fact, I do not think it held anything at all.

The rush of the air-conditioned room greeted me as I entered through the hospital's doors. I took in a swig of air filled with the smell of floor sanitizers, sterilized linen, and a medley of medications.

"Hey Sakura!"

I nearly cringed when I heard a voice that sounded a bit familiar.

_Broody…bored…husky voice. _

It was much too late to pretend that I hadn't heard the person and it was much too late to run from him. Lacking these choices, I gave up and turned around to see what Sasuke wanted (probably to heal a few simple bruises from a mission just to spend time together.)

"What?" I asked, agitated by his appearance.

"Well don't sound so pleased to greet me Sakura." Shikamaru remarked with a yawn as he came closer to me.

"Oh! Shikamaru! I'm sorry, I thought you were someone else." I apologized, obviously surprised it hadn't been who I thought.

His listless eyes studied me for a moment, as though wondering whom I was expecting, but quickly lost interest as he stretched his arms.

"Yeah…anyway, that loudmouth Naruto, Kiba, and I just got back from a mission…I heard you were here so I just stopped by…" another bored yawn escaped his lips, making him not wish to finish the rest of his sentence.

I waited patiently in front of him, my arms akimbo. "And?"

He shrugged, the weary expression on his face clearly stating he did not want to be here.

"Tenten said 'hi'." He grumbled.

My eyes widened in surprise, my lips stretching into a huge grin, delighted to have some word of my friend.

"_When_ did you see her!? Where's her team!? How _is_ she!? Shikamaru _tell_ me!" Several questions exploded out of my mouth like fireworks, nearly startling the languid pose of the chunin.

He studied me for a moment, giving me the calculating look he used when playing with his board games and puzzles.

"It was on our way to our mission…we decided to stop by the Land of the Fang to get some rest and ended up seeing them there." He added, giving me nowhere _near_ enough information on what I wanted to know.

"_How was she_!?" I asked frantically, grabbing Shikamaru by the neck of his chunin vest and furiously shaking him.

He could only muster up an apathetic glare as I continued to force answers out of him.

"S-Sakura! Hey! Let go of me!" he growled, trying to escape from my firm grip. "Why don't you ask her yourself? I mean, her team's back already isn't it?"

My hands slowly stopped shaking him and fell to my sides, completely unaware of what he meant.

"Isn't it?" he repeated, his voice having a tint of confusion.

I shook my head, my mind still trying to register what he had asked. "N-no, they haven't…why?"

The groggy and not too pleased ninja just stared at me, mouth wide, perplexed by the whole matter.

"I saw Tenten and the others a couple months ago…she said their mission was completed and were heading back home..." Shikamaru trailed off before realization struck him. He took hold of both my shoulders, intently looking at me in the eye.

"Sakura…has the Hokage checked the mission status reports lately?"

Again, I shook my head, knowing well my instructor was a great procrastinator when she wanted to be.

He whispered a curse under his breath, his eyes leaving my own and facing the floor. Stepping back, I could only peer helplessly at him and wait for him to speak. I waited for any spontaneous plan he had that would _surely_ fix everything, a _brilliant_ idea that could bring the team back, or a panacea that would suddenly help us know that Tenten and her team was safe. Shikamaru closed his eyes, already ahead of me.

"Look for the latest letter Gai sent to Tsunade…it _should_ have the date and can give us an idea of how long they've been gone and…if the Hokage allows it, I will provide a backup team to help them if they met up with any enemy ninja. In this case, I think it will end up as a search and rescue mission." He said, completely analyzing the situation faster than I could.

I numbly nodded and raced to the Hokage's small office in the hospital, leaving the chunin to further ponder on the belated team.

Completely shoving heavy cabinets away with my newly acquired brute force, I scavenged for his letter, urgency building up within me to read it.

'_Where the hell **is** it!? Gai Sensei you **better** have sent us your letter…' _I bit my lower lip, contemplating the punishments I could give the zealous teacher if he had forgotten.

I pushed the torture methods aside when I finally found the envelope hidden under mountains of folders stacked with other reports.

Written in broad letters was 'PROGRESS REPORT: TEAM GAI.'

I took a ragged breath, murmuring a silent prayer for their safety before violently ripping the letter open.

_Greetings Tsunade-sama, _

_My youthful students and I are ever eager to go home. We are currently located in a remote village in the Land of the Fang and are awaiting further orders to return. Neji and Tenten are alive and well, both filled with tears of nostalgia for their beloved families, wonderful home, and-_

I had to stop to roll my eyes, wondering how Gai Sensei could exaggerate even the most formal letter and make Neji look like he was crying from homesickness. The rest of the letter briefly described their adventures and other trivial "youthful" matters.

…_I am proud to say that my dear pupil is finally returning to his former self, or at least pretending to do so. There are still many doubts that warn me of his ever changing behavior. He has a killing intent about him that is obvious to everyone but himself. I have to admit, I am not at all pleased with him. It seems all that counseling you gave him did not work since he is still a bit unsettled. In other matters, we have been able to successfully retrieve most of the stolen scrolls and goods without any real difficulty. That fact alone is what alarms me the most for I feel we are being pursued. We will rest in the Land of the Fang until enemy ninja give up their search for us. We look forward to a safe return home in about three days. _

_-Maito Gai_

The paper slipped through my fingers shortly after I finished reading it, letting it drop by my feet with a dry crumpling sound. Stacks of letters lay scattered by it, but I held no interest to read the rest of them. I had to inform Tsunade about this as quickly as I could.

'_Three days?...This letter was written over two months ago.'_

Wasting no time for idle worrying, I sprinted out the hospital doors and arrived at the Hokage's office.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"And…how long have they been gone?" Tsunade asked, irritated that her sake break was interrupted by Shikamaru and me barging through her doors.

"Over two months…" Shikamaru answered, allowing me no time to talk.

"And the progress reports?"

"The newest one was sent around that time…they said their return was certain within three days."

"So they're MIA?"

"Tsunade-sama I-"

"That's what we fear." Shikamaru cut me off, speaking as though I was not even there.

As far as he was concerned, this matter was to be left for the Hokage and ninja with authoritative power, NOT burdensome little assistants.

'_It is not my place.'_

Implying surrender, I exited the room with a quick bow of my head and carefully shut the doors.

Sometimes…it really sucked just being a medic ninja.

I occupied myself with other things (as long as they were close to the doors) but tried not to eavesdrop on the somber voices in the other room. It seemed like they have been talking for _hours_!

"…_you think Gai could of…" _

"…_part infested with enemy ninja…"_

"…_it will be dangerous but…" _

I shook my head and covered my ears, mentally scolding myself for even hearing _fragments_ of the discussion. It was not my place, Lee had to be all right-_all_ of them had to be. Before I knew it, Tenten would be spending time with me, Neji would shoot daggers with his milky eyes when he saw me, and Lee would…Lee would come back to see that Sasuke and I had…that Sasuke and I… Anyway-Shikamaru would surely fix this and Tenten, Neji, Gai Sensei, and…and…and Lee would come back. He would bring them back with some wonderful plan-yes, a wonderful plan that would…that would…

"Damn a plan!" I hissed through my teeth, all but ready to barge through the doors once more and punch Shikamaru in the face for not including me in their talk.

'_Who does that bastard think he is!? I'm a ninja too! If anything, **I** should be added to their mission!' _

My outstretched arms were just about ready to shove the door open, ready to clutch Shikamaru's neck until he passed out or Tsunade pulled me off him.

Well, they were _about_ ready to do so…

Before the cause of my wrath appeared before me as he opened the door.

He raised an eyebrow as he looked at my weird stance (one that was ready to jump through a window) and motioned for me to come inside the office. I straightened my posture and gracefully walked through the door with the miniscule dignity I had left. Why did people always get stuck in the _weirdest_ positions _right_ when someone walked in on them?

When I closed the door behind me, I tried not to cringe at the sour face Tsuande was giving me as she sat on her cushioned chair with a grandiose pose.

"Did you need me Tsunade-sama?" I asked courteously.

"Why didn't you check the progress reports sooner?" was her sharp inquiry as she idly inspected her perfectly manicured nails.

I gulped, fearing the punishments she was capable of whenever she casually checked her groomed hands.

"Because you have not asked me to check them lately and…I can't without your permission." I answered slowly and calmly, knowing better than to aggravate her ominous mood.

"Where was I the last two times the reports were filed?!" she barked back, almost not hearing what I had said.

I racked my brain, trying to remember something that far back. "Well…um, I think they came at night…I was going to tell you, but you were…out." I nibbled nervously on my lower lip, clearly recalling she had gone out to drink _both_ those nights. (I just wasn't stupid enough to be so blunt.)

Her eyes and mouth lightly widened in comprehension when she finally grasped my meaning.

'_So…Lee and his team might be **dead** because Tsunade was getting **drunk**? Hm, well **that** seems fair.'_

"I wouldn't worry too much Sakura…" my teacher pointed out as she relaxed into her chair (her dour mood suddenly diminishing.) "Gai's students are all experts at what they do and it's natural for some missions to be delayed due to some setbacks."

I took no comfort in her aloof words.

"Will a squad be sent to search for them?"

"Shikamaru is already forming a five man team for the mission." Tsuande replied, already absorbed in her stacks of paperwork.

"Add me in." I stated, my voice trying to sound commanding but ending up as pleading.

"No." was her simple and cruel reply.

I was baffled by her terse response, not being able to find the gall to speak back. My hands balled into fists, my knuckles turned white, and my eyes could only stare blankly at my instructor. She had denied my request as easily as a straitlaced mother denied her child sweets. My mouth opened in an attempt to talk, but I ended up choking on a sharp intake of air and bitter realization. My teacher gave me a look that said nothing, no reasoning for her malicious answer, no understanding for my feelings in turmoil, not even pity. With a careless wave of her hand, she signified that I could leave, that I could go about my business unaware of the team's condition and wait until their return. There was no way she could be this callous, this _indifferent_ to my obvious feelings.

"Wh-why won't you let me go?" I finally asked, my voice cracking.

She lifted her gaze from her work, apparently surprised to find me still standing before her.

"You are not ready for something as dangerous as that." She said before returning once more to her work.

"Tsunade-sama, you _know_ I've trained _especially_ for these types of missions." I pressed, forcing her to divert her attention away from her neglected papers.

She released an infuriating sigh and rubbed her temples to ward off a coming migraine from my incessant complaining. "Leave me Sakura…take the day off, you've had a very trying day."

I ignored her rare offer, I'd be damned if I didn't get a real excuse out of her.

"WHY!? Why won't you let me go!?" I screamed as I slammed both my tight fists on her desk, causing the neatly stacked papers to fly and scatter on the ground.

Through the rain of paper, I could see Tsunade had a grim expression on her face. She did not react to the spilled work that was now thrown across the floor-I don't think she even realized it. She was too riveted by my brash action to notice anything but my narrowed eyes. Rising from her seat, she went to a small cabinet and took out two bottles of what appeared to be sake. With a motion of her eyes she made me take a seat in front of her and I readily agreed.

"Sakura…you are much too young…too young…" she mumbled softly as she served herself a generous amount of the bitter liquid in her tiny cup.

"I have been going on missions since I was _twelve_ Tsunade-sama, I am sure I can handle it-"

"As usual, you don't understand…being a medic ninja is a lot different than being a normal one-"

"Of _course_ I understand! You just don't think I'm ready, you think-"

"You see death…so much death and you will feel like most of it was your fault somehow. To see a person you love die is one thing…but to actually _be_ the one trying to _save_ that person-to be the one _healing_ them and _then_ watch them die…you…you are _not_ ready for that." She interrupted me, paying no mind to my retorts.

She sipped at her sake, scrutinizing me from the other end of her desk, and served herself more of the liquor.

"I am, Tsunade-sama. I _am_ ready to face it! Sure, some lives are lost, but medic ninjas save countless more! We are sent to protect and to save the lives of our comrades-"

"Do not speak like you understand the meaning of being a true medic nin!" snapped Tsunade as she slammed her drink on the wooden desk. Drops of sake spilled over her papers, all containing important information, but she threw them to the ground as though they were garbage. "Death is not romantic, it is not a game, and it is not just some dream from which you wake up from, it is _reality_!"

I blinked back scalding tears and bit my tongue. Her words echoed in my mind, making memories of a similar insult from the Hyuga spur within me.

_Do not **speak** like you understand_

_Do not **act** like you understand_

I was sick of not being able to understand anything.

"All I understand is that my comrades are in trouble and I must increase our chances of success by joining the squad on our mission!" I exclaimed, swiping the tiny cup away from my teacher and holding it up to my lips.

Her lips curved into a smirk when she saw me do this, almost as though she didn't believe I would be brave enough to drink it. I merely smirked back and swallowed the sake with a sharp tilt of my head.

'_Crap…'_

The small drops of the acrid liquid still lingering in my mouth and lips _nearly_ made me gag. I heard my teacher chuckle as I felt a rush a heat run through my neck and face, making me have a disgusted look. My throat burned from the contact, my eyes watered, my sinuses cleared, and my chest felt uncomfortably light. I cleared my throat after making sure to swallow the remnants of the alcohol and slammed the cup back in front of her, asking for one more shot. She cocked an eyebrow and gave a sniff, but complied as she filled the cup to the brim.

"Sakura…I am not a fool. I can see it is not just your teammates you want to help…it is _Lee_ also." She commented as she served herself some sake on a separate cup.

Though the fact stung something in me, I consumed the drink with a short swig and the feeling was gone. The sake still prickled my throat, but the reflex to choke was gone. I now realized why it was so easy to drink to deal with one's problems. A tinge of sympathy rose when I remembered how I would always frown whenever I saw ninja drinking more than they should after a difficult mission. It was no wonder I even saw our _own_ senseis drinking their fair share whenever I went out at night.

'_Man…this stuff is good…'_ I thought as I reached for the bottle, ready to gulp down my third drink.

Tsunade grabbed it before I could and playfully swayed the bottle in front of my face, _mocking_ me. She lifted a finger and shook it in a scolding manner.

"_I'm_ not even supposed to be drinking this stuff myself, much less let my underage student drink it." She said, filling her own cup for the fourth time.

I rolled my eyes and tried to reach for it again, only to receive a berating light poke on my forehead.

"Why not?" I groaned, rubbing my head.

"Do you still love Lee, my dear student?" Tsunade sweetly asked, implying that she'd give me more of the heavenly liquid if I answered her.

I rolled my eyes and tried to grab the bottle again in vain.

"Have _you_ ever been in love?" I answered with another question. I found myself wondering why it had made my instructor's hands shake.

"In love…" she whispered as she went deathly silent.

"In love." I repeated, taking advantage of the situation and swiping the bottle away from her.

Tsunade stared down at her drink, her eyes still trapped in an unattainable past, her mind probably in the far off memories of her youth that were long gone.

"I…I do not think that is any of your business."

"Then neither is _my_ love life." I finished as I shook the bottle around, hearing its contents splash and wet my fingertips.

With a haughty toss of her head, Tsunade jerked the bottle out of my hand and set it down beside her cup.

"I told you, you shouldn't be drinking this stuff."

"They why did you let me drink the first cup?"

"Aside from that fact that I hoped you gagged from the taste…I like to think that a _true_ relationship between a subordinate and a mentor is built when they first share sake." She answered as though it were obvious.

I gave her an odd look, but decided not to question her weird ideology. Instead, I was more interested in trying different methods to snatch the wondrous liquor from her.

"So?" she asked expectantly, making sure to hold the bottle away where my fingertips could barely touch it.

"So what?"

"Why do you want to go to the mission so badly?"

"Because…because I want to help." I said after a slight pause. I had stopped reaching for the bottle and sat back down on my seat, defeated. There really was no clear reason why I wanted to go…it almost seemed…_illogical_ to me. What was I expecting? Was I hoping to go on the mission, come back to that bastard, somehow _heroically_ save his life, and _magically_ gain his love? It sounded too much like the kind of drama I only watched in movies or something I made up with Ino when we were young and played with dolls. But this wasn't a movie and this wasn't a doll house. I had dusted my hands and put the dolls away long ago…I had grown up to reality.

"Don't give me that bull! If there's one thing I know about medic ninja is that they never _really_ volunteer for anything…they have their own selfish reasons." Tsunade chastised me and pried for other motives.

"I don't have any reasons…I just really want to help my friends….I want to be of some use-"

"You want to be of some use?! _Fine_! Stay here and do as I tell you! Do not go into a battle unprepared only to face the death of a loved one by your own hands! Don't be a _fool_ Sakura!" my instructor shouted as she rose from her seat in frustration.

I was taken back, finally aware of how strongly she disapproved of my decision. It was almost as if she was warning me, as if she was foreshadowing a tragedy she had learned from precedence long before I was even born. A motley array of emotions clashed within me as soon as I saw the determined look in Tsunade-sama's eyes. It was commiseration-no-it was hate…it was…_something_ in between that I felt. I could not possibly fathom what it was that was making me act this way, it was not as though she was doing this out of spite. It was the exact opposite…I _knew_ she was probably trying to save me from something…something I didn't quite yet understand. Or maybe I didn't _want_ to understand.

"They won't die at my hands Tsunade-sama! I won't…I won't _let_ them!" I exclaimed, earning a castigating look from her.

"_Who_ won't die at your hands Sakura? Your comrades…or just _Lee_?" she asked smugly, interested in what was _really_ on my mind. "_That_ is why I forbid you from going on the mission…I know that Lee once had feelings for you…but men are fickle and they change all too easily from things that happen to them. He's different now Sakura…and no one can help him…not me and certainly not you."

"I don't _care_ about that! I _know_ that Lee no longer has feelings for me-he **_abhors_** me!" I screamed, rising from my seat to join Tsunade in a face off. "And yet…and yet…it doesn't matter anymore…I've gotten over it. Right now…I just want to help them and I'm going…whether you approve or _not_."

Tsunade settled back down into her seat for the second time in our heated fight. She tilted the bottle of sake to her cup, but only a few meager drops went into it. She responded with a huff and leaned her head back to stare into the ceiling. Everything went extremely silent between us for a few moments, my own breathing filling the pauses and the sluggish ticking of a clock were the loudest things in the room. It made me uneasy, discomfited even, to know that she had not screamed back or slapped me in the head by my disrespect and disobedience.

"His name was Dan." She muttered while gazing at the white ceiling.

I shifted my eyes toward my teacher and sat back down, gratefully and attentively listening to whatever substituted for the silence.

"Our country was at war…I met him during one of the meetings we often held during that time…" she stopped talking for a moment, it seemed as though it was the first time she dare talk about it.

"Are you talking about someone who was precious to you? A relative? A friend?" I asked, restlessly shifting in my seat (I was obviously not expecting her to reveal something personal to me.)

"A lover." She corrected.

"Ah."

"We were young…about your age I suppose. He had a great dream of becoming Hokage and defending our village…such confidence."

I smiled; a warm blush crept up my neck and cheeks. "What happened to him?"

"He died during a mission…he ruptured one of his vital organs…I couldn't save him no matter how hard I tried." She answered flatly.

My smile fell.

"Oh…" I mumbled, glancing at the floor to avoid looking at her.

"Now do you see? I do not want you going to the mission…you will not like what you see."

"You talk as though he were dead."

"He might be…they all might for all we know. They've been gone for far too long and as much as-"

"Don't SAY THAT! Lee and his team are alive! I just know they are!" I loudly interrupted, roughly pushing my chair aside in fury. "They have to be…just have to." I slowly mumbled afterward, already forlorn.

Tsunade peered at me from the corners of her eyes, her head never leaving the ceiling. Her hand reached for the second bottle of sake and filled both our cups to the point where they almost overflowed. She set the bottle down and carefully lifted one of the cups, motioning for me to take it. My scorn diminished at the lovely sight and I eagerly accepted my third drink. I was perplexed by her sudden change in mood, but I was not one to complain.

"If you are _that_ confident then we should make a toast…" Tsuande said as she straightened herself and rose from her chair. "…and a bet." She added with a smirk.

"A bet?" I asked, confused once again.

She nodded and lifted her cup to my own. "I bet that Lee and his team are dead…but mostly just that Lee is."

I tried not to smile. No matter how sick and demented the wager sounded, I knew she was just trying to consolidate me.

"Then I will bet he is alive and well. In fact…I am sure he is on his way even as we speak." I commented, trying desperately to convince myself that was the case.

She nodded and drank.

I was about to copy her actions, but she lifted her hand and placed it on top of my cup before I could touch a drop.

"What the…? What's wrong?" I asked, puzzled as to why I could not drink in peace.

"I do not want you to get lightheaded. You look like you can hold your liquor, but don't over do it. Why don't we save it for when you come back? From your mission that is." Tsunade suggested as she pulled the cup away from my fingers.

A grin stretched across my face, elated that I would not have to disobey her.

"Now, go home… I'll inform Shikamaru about this. I'm sure it's late now and you still need to pack up don't you?."

I stifled a giggle and nodded, far too pleased to even utter a 'yes.'

With a wave of her hand dismissing me, I practically ran out the room, causing fellow ninja to look at me as if I was insane.

I didn't care.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It was already late into the night once I finished packing my belongings and occasional weapons. There was a feeling of unsettledness that lingered in the pit of my stomach and an aridness in my throat that would not disappear. I took it I was nervous, nervous to see my friends, nervous to see…that _boy_. I shuddered at the thought of seeing him again for the first time in months, _months_. The chirping of crickets could be heard through the window I had opened, its curtains waving slightly from the warm gentle breeze. A rustling of leaves was heard, no doubt from the dry trees around my house. As I took one last look out the window, I managed to see Shikamaru. He was walking toward my house at an urgent pace that seemed so unlike him. Odd…he almost looked like he was _running_.

'_He probably wants me to hurry so we can leave.' _I thought as I shut the window and made my way down the stairs. As expected, there was a knock on my door and I quickly opened it.

Shikamaru stood in front of me drenched in perspiration.

"Sh-Shikamaru? Shikamaru, what's wrong? What happened?" I asked, freaked out by his disheveled appearance.

"You…you have to…you have to come back…to the hospital…" he said between raspy heavy breaths. "Tsunade-sama…sent me…here…as quick as…possible."

Had there been an accident? Had there been an urgent emergency in which Tsunade needed my help?

"Shikamaru, but…but what about the mission!?" I asked, already amidst the frenzy.

"No need…" he panted, "That's why we need you…they're back."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Oh, man, I actually felt content when I finished this chapter. Recommend stuff to me peoples, I'll be more than happy to add ideas from you!


	18. A First Mission's Encounter

Hello 'alo! Thank you again for all the wonderful, funny, and inspirational reviews you guys give me! Truly, I do not deserve such kindness from you! I am very sorry if this chapter was updated a WHOLE lot later than expected, but I rarely had time to work on it. This month has OFFICIALLY been my worst so far in the year lol. My teachers are giving out homework like it's going out of style, all the priests scare the _hell_ out of me (_literally_) in my confirmation classes, and my coach is working us even harder with competition coming up this week. I suppose it's not as bad as I think it is, but a LOT of crap has been happening to me. The first reason why I was not able to update quickly was because I got in a car accident (I was the one driving and it scared the crap out of me.) I was a bit shaken up, but I'm grateful that I did not get seriously hurt. Funny thing was though…I crashed at school…and I hit a _teacher_. (Now I hide whenever I see her.) Then if life couldn't get ANY better, the next day I fell out of a tree and got cuts all over my arms before I landed on my back. (All my friends kept calling me "emo" for the rest of the week.) AND, to put the cherry on top of the sundae, I was late on the day of exams for my school. My friends say it's bad luck, my mom says it's karma, _I_ say it's life. And it's kicking me in the ass! Ah well, the streak of bad luck or karma or whatever the hell it was, eventually went away and I got my life back. Positive side of the crap: I got _somewhat_ inspired. Anyway, thank you again for all your wonderful reviews! They're what keeps me going even after all the stuff I have to put up with in this hectic life of mine! So as always: read, enjoy, and recommend!

**A First Mission's Encounter**

The warm night around us possessed an eerie silence that was only muffled by the sound of hurried footsteps as Shikamaru and I ran to the hospital. How the stillness and serenity could possibly give me such a horrid feeling of dread I did not know. The quickened and labored panting of Shikamaru reached my ears, but I found myself being unable to ask him the endless questions threatening to burst from my mouth. It was as though I could not speak; my lungs were too weary from my labored breaths to spare any air to do so. All I was capable of was following the _usually_ slothful boy beside me who now had an energy and alertness about him that rivaled that of Naruto's.

"Sa…Sakura…we have…we have to…pick up the pace!" Shikamaru pointed out, his pauses filled with short gasps instead of silence.

The roof of the hospital was already in our view as we sprinted through the empty and dim lighted streets. My heartbeat quickened and running had _nothing_ to do with it.

"Shikamaru…what are the patients' current conditions?" I asked, finally regaining control over my voice and breathing.

It was as though the boy had not heard me; he glanced at me for a fleeting second, a dull look of terror filling his eyes.

And that was all I needed to know.

A rush of air mingled with a new tinge of gore greeted us as we opened the doors of the hospital. Shikamaru instantly took a step back, apparently appalled by the stench, but quickly composed himself when I stared at him strangely. Two nurses who had been waiting by the lobby's desk hastily stood from their chairs and motioned for us to come to them. Grabbing my friend, (who was currently in a state of nausea) I walked toward them and tried not to smirk whenever I heard Shikamaru's disgusted grunts and gags. Though most of it was mopped off the floor, a few small puddles of blood still adorned most of the lobby and one of the white light filled hallways. The sight and smell was unpleasant, but it was common for hospital personnel. It had simply stopped bothering me. (As long as I wasn't _informed_ of the owner of the blood that is.)

My right eye twitched in annoyance as I saw one of the nurses rush past me and whisper something of probable importance to Shikamaru. Was I invisible unless they chose otherwise? At the moment I couldn't help but feel unneeded.

"All right…thank you." He muttered back in a coarse voice.

I laid my right hand on my hip and rested my weight on my left leg, waiting impatiently for the team's whereabouts.

"You still haven't answered me you know." I said, insulted by my treatment.

Instead of getting even a _mere_ uttered apology, I received a light dry cough from Shikamaru.

"HEY! Don't ignore me like I'm some kind of idiot!" I shouted, probably tensing up every nurse and medic ninja in the building with the sheer volume of my voice.

The languid ninja before me had the gall to rub the back of his neck and scowl. "Sakura I…this is so troublesome. Come on…the nurses just told me the room numbers of our friends…they don't know about their conditions-"

"But _YOU_ do!" I cut him off. "Why won't you say anything!?"

"Because not even _I_ know how they are now! I just came by to visit Choji after one of his missions and they were lying unconscious by the doors as I was going out." He explained, groaning at having to put in effort to speak.

My eyes widened with interest at the team's odd appearance. "Who brought them? And why weren't they _inside_ the hospital?" I asked, beseeching my friend for more answers.

The boy merely shrugged and took my arm, making me follow him through the light filled hallways.

"I…who knows? There was no one around-oh look I think this is the room number that they gave me for Neji." He mumbled, averting the subject as he inspected the numbers on the door.

I let out a frustrated sigh at my dearth of answers. Shikamaru was NOT making this easy.

"Shikamaru, forget about the damn numbers! Neji's probably not even in there and you just want to change the subject!" I exclaimed accusingly as I grabbed the boy by the neck of his shirt. With each passing second, _beating_ the answers out of him was starting to sound like a brilliant plan.

All it took was a familiar voice cursing loudly behind the door to stop me from strangling the shocked lazy ninja.

'_Hm…looks like Neji IS in there.' _

I hastily released Shikamaru, (who was now rubbing his maltreated neck and looking at me with aggravated eyes,) and walked towards the door until I stood an inch away from it.

"Get your damn hands off me!"

I tried not to smirk at the sound of his usually _stoic_ voice sounding so deafening even across the hall.

There was no way to possibly even _fathom_ what kind of a patient Neji was, let alone if he would allow others to treat his wounds if he was conscious. My inward smirk quickly disappeared as pity rose within me for the medic nin in charge of him.

Without my fingers so much as hesitating to reach for the knob, I swung the door open to see the little ray of sunshine behind it.

"Why are injured ninja so stubborn?" I seemed to ask no one in particular as I strolled into the room.

Two helpless looking medics by a bed stared at me for a moment, almost as though they did not recognize me. Between them and their tangled arms lay Neji, who surprisingly _also_ gawked at me with the same confused expression. The boy's violent struggle against the strength of the four arms holding him back was evident when I realized the bed sheets around them were sprinkled with blood. The source of the viscous substance was out of my view seeing as how the medic nin were all but prepared to get on top of him. I took a few steps toward the bed, making the ninja in front of me release their grip on Neji (much to his relief.) Upon closer inspection, I finally noticed two kunai knives were imbedded on his left shoulder and leg.

"Is _that_ what this fuss was all about?" I asked teasingly as I walked toward some cabinets and took out the necessary equipment to treat the wounds. "Neji, you can't handle even a _little_ pain?"

"Sakura, what the hell do you think you are doing here?" He growled through gritted teeth as he lifted his upper body from the bed.

"Nice to see you too." I mumbled sarcastically, his mordant greeting not even fazing me. "Was that _you_ screaming while we were at the other end of the hospital? You sounded like a woman Neji." I added, further irritating him. I gathered the needed equipment in my arms and turned to look at him.

He glared back at me with a fully activated byakugan.

"For a moment, I thought I had walked into a midwife and her patient!" I gave him a disparaging look as I threw in another insult. Both the men who tried to keep Neji down probably thought it was suicide I wanted. I needed no motivation to exacerbate the situation and his mood.

Neji was about to open his mouth, ready to spew some form of profanity at me.

"Sakura-san…" one of the medic nin said tiredly as he interrupted my friend, "please help us hold him down. He just woke up and…I'm afraid he is more concerned about his other comrades than he is about his own health at the moment."

My eyebrows perked up in interest as I glanced at the taciturn boy shooting daggers at me with his eyes.

"Other comrades you say?" I implied that I wanted to be informed of this matter.

"Yes…Tsunade-sama is treating their Sensei in the ICU."

"The ICU? Is he _that_ badly injured? What happened?" I asked, worry evident in my eyes and voice.

"I don't know, but I think I heard it's nothing that serious. Everything's fine."

"Well if he's in there I doubt _anything's_ fine." I said, frustrated once again from my futile efforts to get information. The exhausted men bowed their heads in deep respect for my generosity to take care of their patient and exited the room.

I gave my attention back to Neji, who seemed intent on rising from the bed.

"I wouldn't try any sudden movements…those kunai look like they need to be removed carefully if you don't want to _bleed_ to death." I pointed out as I ungracefully pushed him back down on the bed with a shove of my index finger.

"I do not care about that right now. And what the hell are _you_ doing here?" he retorted, his eyes and mouth tightly closed to endure a slight shock of pain.

I unrolled a few gauze strips and took a scalpel in my hand. "I'm a medic nin too…I became the Hokage's apprentice…a while back." I explained rather hesitantly.

Neji said nothing and took a recumbent position on the bed, satisfied with the answer.

"But never mind that…just take off your shirt and pants." I ordered, finding it difficult to pull out the sharp knives with the fabric in the way.

"_What_?"

"Your shirt and pants, take them _off_." I repeated wearily, growing impatient with him.

"Why?" he challenged, a hint of mortification concealed in his dignified, but cracking tone.

I pinched the top bridge of my nose between my eyes, warding off my rage. "Do you just _want_ to walk around with those things sticking out of you or what?"

His lucid eyes narrowed into lethal slits ready to kill me, but he reluctantly complied.

'_Well, that's ONE plus side to being a medic nin.' _I joked to myself as I inspected what many girls in the village would have _killed_ to see. If I had grinned and hadn't been preoccupied with worry for Neji's teammates, I swear I would've looked just like that Ero-sennin while "data gathering."

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Those damn eyes could see _anything_ couldn't they?

"No-it's nothing, forget it." I said as I brushed off his suspicion. "Can you tell me what happened? What happened that took you so long to get here? And where are Tenten and Lee?" I inquired, already desperately needing answers from another source.

"I'm not inclined to answer." He flatly stated, crossing his arms over his chest in a pretentious manner.

I rolled my eyes and checked the injuries. For battle wounds, they did not appear to be that serious or made with the intention of killing. The fact of how Neji would even _allow_ himself to be pierced with such an easily avoidable weapon was what bothered me the most. Some logical residue left in me told me not to pry into their mission. "Vastus medialus…and supraspinatus? Or is that just part of the deltoid?" I asked myself, trying in vain to create a decent conversation with the half-naked boy sitting on the bed. I was willing to try anything to get more information and see his teammates.

"When you're done wasting time using me as your little anatomy quiz just let me know." Neji berated, his voice thick with anger.

'_So much for small talk.' _

A feeling of defeat came over me when I realized that mere badinage would not make Neji talk about the subject. For once, I obeyed his advice and kept quiet. Using the scalpel to gently loosen the kunai knives, I quickly managed to relieve his shoulder and leg. Blood seeped through the open wounds, but slowly coagulated as I patted the cuts with a few cotton balls and gauze strips. I was tempted to jeer once more at Neji by asking him if he wanted to keep the knives as a souvenir, but decided against it as I threw the stained kunai into a nearby sink. His breathing grew balanced and his tense muscles relaxed as I rubbed some soothing ointment on the cuts to finish the job.

"There," I said with a dry tone, feeling the listless silence bear down on us as I wrapped some bandages around his shoulder and leg. "All better."

"Thank you." Neji said gruffly as he stood from the bed. He put on his pants and pulled his shirt over his head.

He was about to move until I shoved him back down.

"You move and those wounds will tear open again." I warned.

"I told you already that I don't care. I need to go-" he tried to rise from the bed once more before I pushed him back.

"Go where? Tell me Neji."

"Lee is not here…"

"Lee is probably resting in his room, with any luck he might be in better condition than you." I said, never letting Neji finish his sentence.

"You don't understand as usual." Neji seethed venomously. "I don't know what they told you here, but Lee is _not_ here."

My forehead wrinkled in confusion as I stared worriedly at Neji. "Was he the one who left you guys outside the hospital doors?" I asked, the heavy realization slowly sinking into my mind.

Neji nodded his head and looked at the ground. "Yes…but I do not know where he is now…"

"But what _happened_!? You're not telling me anything. _No one_ is!" I shouted furiously, my voice bouncing off the walls of the small room.

The Hyuga paid no mind to me as he eschewed my frantic questions. He appeared to be more absorbed in trying to get off the bed.

"That…bastard…he's actually willing…" he muttered to himself as he glared at his wounded leg.

"Willing to what? Neji, what the hell happened to you guys the whole time you were gone? Where's Lee? What happened to him?" I was all but hysterical now, feeling like my very sanity would be lost if I did not know anything that had occurred.

"I can't explain now, I have to stop him. The idiot's hurt and he's probably not even in the right mind…" he mumbled as he got off the bed, swiftly dodged my shove, and ran toward the door.

"NEJI!" I screamed after him before he opened the door...

And ungracefully crashed against someone.

"Neji? What are you doing walking around?" asked my instructor as she closed the door behind her and unknowingly trapped him between the two of us.

"I need to leave…Lee probably intends to leave the village." he urged for an escape, trying to run past Tsunade-sama in vain.

Odd. If the situation hadn't been so somber I would've laughed at the way my teacher kept shoving him back.

"Settle down Neji, you're not going anywhere until those wounds heal." She remarked, making sure to push the poor boy farther back into the bloody covers of the bed.

"Tsunade-sama, Lee will run away from the village if we don't stop him." He said, trying not to grimace from the pain emitting from his shoulder.

"I am aware of that…Tenten told me a bit about what happened-"

"How are they?" Neji asked, surprising _both_ of us with his abrupt sign of concern.

Tsunade-sama sighed and rubbed her temples to allay her anxiety. "We had to perform surgery on Gai…he's unconscious, but he's alive...just barely. As for Tenten, she just suffered from a severe concussion, but received no internal cranial damage, thank god."

Neji breathed in a sigh of relief, her news finally mollifying his worst fears.

"And aside from the kunai cuts that Sakura treated, it seems the rest of the hospital staff healed your other wounds with jutsus." Tsunade said as she studied Neji's body and face for a moment. "You were a bloody mass of pulp when you first came in." She turned to look at me and motioned to follow her out the room.

"Neji, I'll be in my office and Sakura's coming with me, I've already sent a team out to retrieve Lee." She said as she led me through the door. "If you try and get out you'll regret it."

Her hostile voice held a warning that I knew she would punish if not heeded. I just hoped Neji was aware that Tsunade held no empty threats.

000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

As we entered the privacy of her office, my mouth was once again ready to explode with a list of inquiries. "Tsunade-sama what-!"

"You have a mission to do."

"I-what?"

"A mission. I have reason to believe that Lee might still be in the village…we just don't know in what condition he is in-or if he is even _alive_ for that matter." She said as she sat down on a chair behind her desk. "So, I will send you to retrieve him…be cautious though…he's not in the right mind."

"Tsunade-sama, I can't go alone, what happened to Shikamaru?!" I asked, _barely_ remembering that I ditched him when I had entered Neji's room.

"I've sent him to get some medicinal ingredients from his father. If I called for another team, Lee would be long gone." She said rather simply.

I was left speechless in front of her and clueless on what I should do or say. Even if I _wanted_ to speak, my dry throat would not allow it. My heartbeats halted, my mind had long abandoned me, and my limbs grew languid. I did not wish to leave. Was there no reasoning behind this instructor of mine? Did she _want_ me to see Lee?

"…Why?..." was all I uttered. A moment passed, if only a moment, where I was filled with the irrepressible desire to stay. If I left, it would mean I would meet Lee again.

And I did not wish to see that boy.

"What's wrong? Is my little student afraid that she will make a mistake on a mission all by herself?" she asked derisively, lacing her fingers together and resting her chin on them.

She was _daring_ me to go.

I furiously shook my head and pushed my fears, my doubts, my anxiety, _everything_ aside in an instant.

"When can I leave?" my uneven voice and thoughts of logic battled against one another as I asked this.

"_Now_, that is, if you still wish to see Lee while he's alive."

I wasted no time with a witty remark for Tsunade and bolted out the door.

'_Lee…I'll kill you if you die...'_

A vague feeling of presentiment lingered in the corner of my mind, but I shoved it away as I ran through the bare streets of Konoha. The restless shifting of leaves on tree branches was the only thing I heard, not even the blithe chirping of crickets was audible in the motionless night. It was the kind of deadly silence that threatened to give way to new doubts and fears. The kind that was unbearable and drove you to the brink of insanity if you could not control yourself. My speed was hastened to escape it. I could already feel that twilight was near despite the darkness that engulfed the ominous village. The apartment complex in which Lee lived was barely in my sight. With any luck, I would find him there.

'_I **better** find that bastard there…I don't want anymore important people to leave me.'_

I shuddered at the thought of having a repeat of a retrieval mission. They did not sit well with me. The staircases leading to his apartment nearly wore me out as I scrambled to get up. I damned the builder who decided that _six_ floors was a wise idea. My footsteps echoed across the winding halls that displayed all of Konoha before my eyes. I held no interest for the aesthetic sight; only one thing was on my mind now. My trembling legs threatened to buckle underneath my weight if I did not hold on to the railings for support. After controlling my gasping breath, I finally managed to reach his door.

It was open.

I could only stare at it and wonder if I dared to step foot inside the dark apartment. A splash of something was heard somewhere inside the hall, forcing me to swallow my fear of what I could encounter. Running my tongue over my dry cracked lips, I placed one trembling foot behind the threshold.

I stepped on something wet.

If my hands hadn't grasped the slippery cool doorknob I surely would have fallen on my face. I was startled at first, but quickly regained my composure once I realized how pathetic I must have looked. The floor seemed to be slick with some sort of liquid that I couldn't see in the obscurity of the room. I mentally cursed myself for not being on guard in such a critical situation and proceeded further into the apartment. There was a dripping noise echoing across the hallway where a sliver of light could be seen. It sounded like a faucet.

"L-Lee?" I shakily called out into the gloomy ambience. My steps, however silent, were hesitant and wary as I walked into the hall. My stomach churned and my head felt unbelievably light when I noticed something different in Lee's apartment. I tried to focus solely on the sliver of light and tried to ignore the eerie sounds. My legs stopped moving once I noticed the scent of morbidity thick in the air. Any movement I wished to make was suddenly refused by my body.

'_I…I'm afraid to go any further.' _

The source of the light was now in front of me, _tantalizing_ the utter terror within me to reach for it.

"L…" my voice was nonexistent, my breath scarce.

My feet were now reluctant to move, but my arm and hand seemed willing to try as I began to reach for the door.

'_You can do it…move…move…MOVE!'_

I finally gave into my mental persuasion and shoved the door open with the bare tips of my fingers.

"L…L…Lee?" I choked out the boy's name inside the bathroom.

My tongue was stuck to the roof of my arid mouth, my feet frozen to the ground with fear. Without realizing it, my rapidly beating heart had long abandoned it's place in my chest. It was now glaringly pounding inside my head, smashing away at my brain and echoing across my ears. Weak knees miraculously allowed me a step inside the room. I blinked and my mind tried to process the scene in front of me in vain. I opened my mouth to try to say something, but merely released a gasp.

'_Oh…god.'_

My eyes widened, my breathing halted, and my heart _burst_. Whatever audacity I once possessed to stomach the sight of blood was now gone. The floor underneath me was slick with the dark fluid, the pungent smell of it filling the entire bathroom. The bathtub in the corner of the room was filled to the brim, its steaming water a bright pink. The light in the room clearly revealed crimson handprints smeared across the door that I had just opened. Towels satiated with blood were scattered on the floor, their contents seeping into the already soaked tile. My eyes frantically scanned the gruesome sight

"L….Lee?" my question went without an answer as my eyes finally rested on a frail quivering figure by the sink.

The person was unclothed, save for a reddening towel loosely wrapped around his waist and some bandages around his stomach. His rounded back was white as milk, trembling with each forced breath. I took several steps inside and called out his name once more. There was no boldness within me now to reach out and touch him. I swallowed a lump in my throat and fought to find my voice.

"L-Lee!" I now screamed, desperate for a reaction out of the boy in front of me.

For a moment, there was silence. I could do nothing but watch helplessly as he continued to show his back toward me. I wanted him to answer me, to _face_ me, and to tell me that he was all right, but he kept complete focus on whatever was in front of him.

"G-go…a-away…" he hissed, his voice shaking as violently as his body.

I was clueless on what else to say, it was an ordeal trying to find my voice.

"Lee…Tsunade-sama sent me for you. You…you're hurt Lee…and you need medical attention."

The boy grabbed the side of his abdomen as he stifled a grunt of pain. I flinched when I heard him gag on some bodily fluid.

"G-get the h-hell out…" Lee stuttered as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand and turned on the faucet. His pallid body oscillated in front of the sink as he tried to balanced himself. His reflection could be seen in the condensed mirror, allowing me a glimpse of his condition. Though his head was lowered, the state he was in was now obvious to me. I could see his white parting lips that trembled with each raspy breath he took; I could still see his bloodless cheeks deprived of any nourishment. He looked like death.

There was no way I was leaving here without him.

"No."

"GET OUT!" he bellowed, nearly making me flinch with his thunderous voice.

Surprised by his harsh reaction, I retreated several steps back, looking at Lee as though he were a wounded beast that needed to be left alone.

"If y-you…c-come…any closer…I-I swear…" his threat was left unfinished as he clutched his stomach once more.

He was trying to conceal what appeared to be spurting blood. The crimson substance stubbornly exuded from the wound despite his desperate efforts to stop it. It made a thick trail that dripped down to his right leg and created tiny puddles on the floor. The sudden gore made me gulp, but I tried to allay any coming hysteria. This was no time to question my ability. I took several deep breaths and attempted to walk toward Lee once more.

'_This is what Tsunade **trained** you for Sakura. You can't choke…not **now**.' _

Lee quickly felt my advances and frantically turned around to face me. His clumsy movement made him oppress a shriek of pain, letting it come out a mere grunt. Using what miniscule strength he had, he staggered away from me as he tried to repudiate my outstretched hand trying to console him.

"I'm…I'm not going anywhere without you Lee." I said confidently.

"S-Sa…Sakura…g-get…o-out…" he grumbled menacingly with eyes half-closed. The blood loss was already impairing his speech and vision. "I…I do not…w-wish to hurt….you."

"I don't want to hurt _you_ the way you are now!" I pleaded earnestly as I got closer to Lee.

My hand was now mere inches away from the boy, ready to lay a comforting caress on his back. Lee appeared to be docile now and ready to communicate with me.

'_I can do this…'_

As if on instinct, his hand violently grabbed my own with a terrifying force that threatened to snap my wrist in two if he did not let go. A frightened whimper escaped my unmoving lips, but I bit my tongue to stop from crying out in pain. I'd be damned before I showed any type of weakness in my first encounter with Lee. It was no longer an option for me as a medic nin and as a stronger person. My knees grew weaker despite my impassive façade. A lone bead of perspiration trickled down my face as I stared at Lee's loveless eyes piercing into me. I was no longer gazing at the boy I used to love, I was no longer in the presence of a comrade, and I was no longer looking at someone I even _knew_. As he kept his excruciating hold on me, I looked at his eyes searchingly in hopes of finding something humane. I wanted to find a shred of benevolence, a sliver of pity, a mere _speck_ of remorse as he glared back.

I looked and looked, but found none.

There was nothing.

It was then that I realized we were scrutinizing every part of one other. My cheeks filled with discomfiture and I was the first one to tear my gaze away from his body. A familiar feeling of humiliation washed over me when I noticed that Lee had not stopped staring as I had.

"Lee…let…_go_." I hissed my order as I glared at the unwanted contact and back at him.

The heavy scowl on Lee's face lingered even after I asked him to release me.

"I do not…need assistance."

It was then that I started to jerk my hand away in vain. He had a death hold on me.

"Like hell you don't!" I shouted in his face.

"LET ME DIE SAKURA! J-just let me _die_!" he screeched beseechingly, his voice dripping with misery as he glared at me.

"No!" I answered back as I made a grab for his arm with my free hand.

With an inhuman alacrity, he seized it before I could even touch him. He now held both my wrists in his hands. I was trapped.

'_Fine…have it your way Lee.' _

By exerting all the strength I could muster, I shoved the injured boy against the sink, shattering it to bits in the process. Water cascaded down the broken ceramic and accumulated to make a medley of jagged shards and liquid beneath our feet. The pieces pricked at our ankles and the rushing water of the faucet sprayed at our faces with an unbearable pressure. My vision was blurred, but I refused to blink for fear of giving Lee any advantage. We were now drenched in water and sweat, neither one of us willing to surrender the strenuous fight. Lee's hands persistently held on to my own even after having the shock of being thrown against the hard ceramic.

"Sakura…why?" he uttered, his face barely visible through the shooting water around us.

Lee kept his eyes fixed on me and tightened his grip on my wrists. The pressure nearly made my hands numb. He brought both my wrists to the sides of my legs, giving me no opportunities to escape. I bit my lip to silence my pleading that would surely come of me if the pain on my hands persevered. I'd be damned before I begged for anything. Lee was no exception.

"Sakura…why…do you not…understand?" he growled. "W-why?"

"It's a mission." I answered with a stoicism that matched Neji's. "I can't let you leave."

I felt Lee's strong grip on me lessen with hesitation at my reserved response. He didn't like look he had been expecting it. It almost made me smirk.

This was my chance.

Taking advantage of his brief state of mental uncertainty and faltering strength, I jerked one of my hands free and tried to seize his pulsing neck. One pressure point…just one. That's all I needed to hit. Despite the critical blood loss, Lee's wounds were not fatal. If he lost consciousness, it would only make my nearly impossible mission a facile errand to complete. He wouldn't die.

He _couldn't_.

I wouldn't let him.

Again, Lee would not have been worth much as a ninja if he weren't known for his quick reflexes. Despite his wound, he swiftly clutched my hand once more and rammed me into the wall behind me. The man before me and I glowered at each other, both of us locked in a face off that would prove deadly if provoked. Our faces were flushed from the vicious struggle, our intense panting reached our ears, and all we could do was stare at the person in front of us.

"You are…much too weak…for me to fight…" He simply said as he broke the fatal silence. "I…do not…wish to waste…my time on you."

Fury bubbled inside of me at his comment. "Nor I on you!" I screamed back, pulling my knee back and landing a sharp strike to his stomach. I'd be damned before any fool called me that again. They'd regret it, I didn't care _who_ said it. Even if it was _him_. My fist sent Lee crashing back into a wall, nearly obliterating it in the process.

"Weak my ass Lee!" I added as the boy tried to regain consciousness.

The fact that he was injured did nothing to abate my wrath.

Lee groaned and touched the bandages on his abdomen, obviously confused on what had happened. He gawked at me with bewildered eyes filled with disbelief over what I had done (or if I was even _capable_ of doing such a thing.) I rubbed my wrists and shot him a hostile glare indicating him not to take me lightly. He stood up with legs enervated of strength, his expression telling me he was apparently still in shock over the matter. His eyes squinted at me and his head began to swing back and forth in a state of utter daze. It almost made me wonder what he was doing.

'_Oh god…he's not going to.' _

He collapsed back on the rubble of his wall, his body limp and unmoving.

In a moment, I was by his side checking his pulse. "Damn it! Don't pass out! Not _now_!"

'_Smooth Sakura…' _

My mind frenetically went over my options when I noticed his pulse was faint. As long as it was there, it didn't matter. Reaching into the pouch hooked around my waist, I took out what I needed for this situation. I looked up to the ceiling crumbling because of me, inhaled the metallic air to calm myself, and took out a tiny black capsule. It was a blood loss pill.

Just what Lee needed.

I crouched beside Lee and lifted his head to my chest. After opening his mouth, I placed the medication inside of it and rubbed his throat to make him swallow. This would help buy me a few precious hours to arrive at the hospital.

'_Now…about his clothes.' _I thought nervously as I pondered the different methods to clothe Lee without embarrassing _both_ of us.

Unintentionally, I gulped as I saw the rest of his bare body glistening with pink drops of water. They trickled down his firm chest and legs save for the section the towel (thankfully) covered. I could stand blood, I stand to take some pain, and I could even stand a half-naked _Neji_ but…that damn towel was making my mission nearly impossible to stand. I had completely no gall left in me to dress a man.

But I had to do it.

It was part of the mission.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As I walked through the hospital doors with Lee's flaccid body hanging from my back, I couldn't help but feel a bit self-conscious. The countless odd stares and hushed whispers from the nurses and people in the lobby made my face burn several degrees. I then realized that if _I_ would've seen a ruffled panting girl dragging the beaten and unconscious body of a boy wearing a green jumpsuit, my reaction would have been the same.

'_Could be worse…I could be dragging a **naked** unconscious beaten boy.' _

If I hadn't been so concerned with Lee's health, a smile would have crossed my lips.

'_Good thing that jumpsuit was there.' _

After mere _minutes_ of searching for anything resembling clothes for Lee, I had come across the green attire I had left crumpled up on his floor on his last night. Hopefully, the doctors would give him a hospital gown before anyone realized that that was _all_ he was wearing.

"Stop staring and come help me!" I barked, nearly making the poor nurses jump.

Several came to my assistance while others ran to get some medic nin to handle the rest. I placed Lee on the ground, finally grateful that I could rest my aching back from the long way I had ran. He was still knocked out, but the pill had stopped most of the bleeding before it had gotten worse. Incoherent words slipped through his pale lips, some having no meaning at all. It was odd how he kept mentioning his sensei's first name, but his voice possessed no signs of being amiable.

I shook it aside and forced myself to think he was probably worried for him.

Though I was relieved when they placed Lee's body on a stretcher to receive further medical attention, a feeling of despondence lingered inside my chest as they pulled him away from me. There was something that bothered me about the hollow space left in my arms.

"Thank you Sakura-san, we will take it from here. You can go see Tsunade-sama" Was all a nurse mumbled to me before they took him into the maze-like ivory halls of the hospital.

I heaved a sigh of weariness from my latest encounter with Lee as I made my way toward the dreaded office. Whenever people told me to meet the Hokage in her office, _nothing_ pleasant ever came of it. It usually meant more paper work to fill out since Shizune-san hadn't come back yet or a severe berating from some petty mistake in my studies. In any case, it just plain _sucked_.

I opened the door to her office and slowly closed it, bracing myself for whatever misfortune fate was about to give me.

"Back so soon?" a voice hidden behind a chair asked mockingly. "How was it?"

I cringed and sat down behind her desk. "I got him back." I answered. "Though…he turned out to be a patient who was no longer amenable to reason."

Tsunade released a light chuckle and turned her chair around. "Oh? But how did you feel about your first _solo_ mission?" she asked as she rested back on her seat and crossed her legs. Her voice seemed welcoming, but her eyes told me otherwise seeing as how they gave me no indication of praise or recognition.

They rarely did anyway.

"It…it was fine…I suppose." I grumbled. There was a bottle of sake by her desk and I felt my mouth water as I eyed it.

My teacher was aware of where my focus was and smirked. She took the bottle in her fingertips and practically taunted me with it.

"My, it looks like that little bet was resolved sooner than we expected, but it's a bit unhealthy to start drinking _this_ early in the morning for your age, don't you think?" she asked.

I nodded, though I would've drank it no matter _what_ time it was.

"Was Lee happy to see you?"

"If by 'happy to see me' you mean 'he tried to kill me' then yes." I responded with a short dry laugh. The matter was hardly worth joking about, but I found an irony in hurting someone for whom I cared.

"Did he hurt you?" she inquired, trying to broach her favorite subject.

I opened my mouth but quickly shut it. There was no way to answer such a question. It made me feel like a fool…like a fool unable to dissemble her feelings. Lee _had_ hurt me, but I was physically fine.

Tsunade-sama rose from her seat before I could reply and put the bottle away in a cabinet. "You don't have to answer." She interrupted, "Why don't you get some rest? I will see you tomor-well…I'll see you _today_."

I was grateful to her as I lifted myself from the chair and walked towards the door.

"Oh, and Sakura?" she added as my fingers touched the doorknob to leave.

"Y-yes?"

"Congratulations…you saved your first patient's life."

"…Thank you."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

You have NO idea how many times I had to rewrite this until I was comfortable with it. I must have like…jeeze…six alternate chapters. Ah, well. I will update as quickly as humanly possible (it'll be easier since my confirmation, competition, and homework will be done soon.) Thank you all!


	19. It Comes With the Job

Hello 'alo! Again, for the nineteenth time, I thank you for all your lovely reviews! They are what keeps me and this story going! I am so sorry for updating a bit late (this has been the most time I've taken to write the chapter) I was out on vacation during spring break so I did not get to work on this for quite some time. I swear I won't let it happen again. Anyway, I've actually had fun while trying to think up new stuff with all the inspiration I've had lately. My streak of bad luck is finally gone and I've been having the best time of my life. Funny thing happened that inspired me to write more…I was invited to a rave a few weekends ago, the only catch was that it was 80's themed. So, you can only _imagine_ what I decided to wear. lol I noticed that Lee had that 80's style going on so (AS A JOKE) I searched for DAYS trying to find orange legwarmers and green stockings (I wanted to pass it off as the "80's Aerobics instructor" look.) I finished it off with a skirt, high heels, and this _vintage_ orange shirt from my mom. Turns out…that at SOME POINT…Lee's clothes could've passed off for "cool" in the eighties. Everyone loved the style and kept asking me where I got the idea for the legwarmers! I just thought it was so funny since everyone thinks Lee's sense of style is um…yeah. Anyway, just wanted to put that out there before I forgot. Thank you again for your awesome reviews, you guys make my day! Anyway, as always: read, enjoy, and recommend!

**It Comes With the Job**

I hadn't slept.

I hadn't slept **_at all_**.

Not even after I had gotten home.

I stared at my fan oscillating lazily as I lay sprawled over my bed. My hands clutched fistfuls of my bed sheets as though they would be jerked away from me. The remnant memories of last night were still fresh on my mind, pestering me like a wound that would not close. The trilling of birds was inaudible, the effulgent sunlight through my window invisible, and my mother's calls from downstairs ignored. Nothing seemed to pull me out of my meditative state. My body was weary of endless tossing and noisy turning from my night, but I could guarantee it no rest. There hadn't been a single moment where the damn boy had not been on my mind as I tried to sleep. Every time my heavy eyelids found some refuge, **_he_** would creep into my mind. **_He_** would creep in and make me remember his derisive eyes bearing down on me as we battled one another on his bloody bathroom floor. My efforts to forget him were in vain of course, but I was sick of it all, just _sick_.

"SAKURA!? Are you awake yet!?" my mother's booming (yet somewhat concerned) voice still persisted from downstairs.

I let out a disappointed grunt as I rose from bed and ran my fingers through my knotted hair.

"Coming!" I answered back wearily.

My hair, still damp from a hastily taken shower when I returned home, still possessed a metallic smell that forced me to gag. The blood was washed, the sweat cleaned off, and the tears had all been spent. Despite this fact, I was left to ponder why my body still felt plagued by those fluids. There was nothing I desired more than to forget about last night's unexpected mission. I wanted to forget about the crushing pressure of the water spraying at my face, I wanted to _forget_ the horrid rich scent of gore, and I wanted to _forget_ having to carry Lee's beaten body back to the hospital. Nevertheless, as much as I wanted to, I could never forget what had been so tangible. The pain and blood had been as real as the throbbing bruises on my wrists.

"Sakura!?"

'_Ugh…' _

"COMING!"

I rummaged my closet for something suitable to wear, brushed my unruly hair, and stomped my way downstairs to meet my clamorous mother.

"Sakura! I can't get this thing to turn on!" was her whining greeting as I saw her studying the stove.

I rolled my eyes at my culinary challenged mother and simply flipped the stove's switch to "ON."

"Honestly mom, how did we not _starve_ when I was younger? Who _cooked_!?" I asked tiredly as I gave her a puzzled look.

She gave me a warm smile and took a seat near the kitchen counter to sip her tea. "Your father of course…" was her happy answer, "that or takeout when he was away on missions." she added sheepishly with a growing grin.

I sighed and inspected the kitchen. Everything still seemed to be intact; there was nothing charred or melting so our house would be safe from my mother's experiments for one more morning.

"You haven't **_cooked_** anything yet…have you?" I questioned cautiously, on my guard for any explosions. Satisfied with my mother's silence, I continued our meal and finished beating the eggs and chopping up vegetables.

"Oh, Sakura…not _all_ of us have the connections to take cooking lessons from ex cooking-nins, but I can assure you my cooking doesn't blow up your face like yours once did." My mother teased as she brought up my earlier pitiful attempts at baking.

I cringed at the cake incident that was all but a faded memory in my mind. It had been my first and last _failed_ culinary creation before begging Tsunade-sama to hire some former cooking-nin to help me. Hell, I was often learning Tsunade's lessons faster than she could teach them so she had no reason to object to my odd request.

"That was a long time ago mom…" I mumbled, aggravated from the playful reminder.

"I know…but I just love to see your face flush like that whenever I talk about it!" she exclaimed with an amused laugh.

I groaned and tried to dismiss my mother's usual jocular mood. She had made it a habit to "_casually_" mention my past fiascos whenever we spent time together.

"Sakura, speaking of that funny incident, whatever happened to that nice young man you brought over that day?" she asked, tentatively broaching another one of her predictable topics.

It seemed Lee was her favorite one.

"You mean the one you screamed at for twenty minutes before I calmed you down?" I grumbled as I flipped the eggs in the steaming pan.

"_That's_ the one!" she exclaimed as though _just_ being reminded of him. "I haven't seen him for a while…how has he been?"

I shrugged, not wanting to comment on the almost morbid matter. There was nothing I wanted to say about that man…that utter _stranger_. What **_could_** I say about someone who had tried to kill me? The Lee I knew was long gone and my feelings went with him. My mother only saw a _glimpse_ of the innocent and moribund boy that day, yet it was enough to mention him in any conversation we had _since_ then. She was hopeless for thinking about him as I had often foolishly did-thinking that he would someday come back with his blithe optimism of "youth." Just the _thought_ of him made me feel obsolete and nauseous. At that moment, all I felt like doing was feigning a smile, dumping the half-cooked omelet in the trash, walking over to my mom, and kneeling in front of her.

And then start bawling on her lap.

I felt like telling her _everything_ the second I saw her smile after Lee's name casually escaped her lips. There was so much I wished to tell her-so _much_ that needed to be released like a breath held for far too long. My mind screamed at me to tell her everything that had happened since seeing that damn boy. The meeting, the drowning, the hostility, the spaghetti, the training, the meaning of that godforsaken cake, the rain, and that…_kiss_. I wanted to profess all these buried things and more before shamelessly crying like a child in her embrace. More painfully sweet memories and experiences rushed through my mind before I could even blink back my tears. I opened my mouth…but could find neither breath nor courage to speak.

'_Damn…'_

My eyes went dry when I realized I could spare no more tears for such an old matter. I no longer wished to _have_ that horrid luxury. Crying was something I had deserted long ago…along with any emotion I had for that bastard. I bit my lip when I knew I would provide my mother with no answer. A pregnant silence filled the kitchen, her slight humming being its only relief. She appeared as though she would change the subject to placate me.

"So how is work?"

"It's…murderous."

"That tiring huh?"

"You have no idea."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"Good morning Sakura!" a familiar voice called out to me as soon as I took a step inside the hospital doors.

I spun around, a bit dazed from someone addressing me so abruptly, and lifted my gaze off the ground long enough to notice a woman with dark hair standing by the lobby's desk. She held a stack of folders in her hands and looked as though she would nearly fall over with the unbalanced weight.

"Shizune-san! It's so nice to see you again!" I exclaimed, mustering a genuine smile for the weary looking medic nin.

She smiled back and attempted to wave without knocking over the mountain of papers and folders. I ran up to her, mentally scolding myself for not rushing to her side sooner and helping her.

"Here! I'll carry some." I offered, taking more than half the stack in my arms.

She muttered some form of thanks and began to walk with me towards the file cabinet office.

"So how have things been…with Tsunade-sama in my absence?" she asked, a certain hesitance evident in her voice.

We slowly entered the humid office and tried to walk through the turmoil in front of us. Stacks of neglected paperwork and dusty cramped file cabinets nearly tripped us with every step we took. The blistering summer heat had added to its already suffocating atmosphere and I began to groan in annoyance. My shirt stuck to my shirt as perspiration beaded down the side of my face. The tiny room was insufferable, seeing as we just dumped everything in a nearby corner for the unfortunate nurses in charge of sorting. I slammed the door behind us and we smiled nervously at each other for a job _half_ decently done.

"Let's just come back later to organize those papers before Tsunade-sama finds out." Shizune said, almost reading my mind.

I quickly nodded and accompanied her to our teacher's office. It was not as though we would _really_ step foot inside that room again anyway. (I would have rather treated Naruto than do such a thing.)

"When did you return? We've missed you so much! How was your mission? Did it proceed the way you guys planned? What did the Kazekage say about it?" I babbled on with questions, desperate to stray away from the imminent topics concerning me.

"I just got back this morning. The mission was a success! The Leaf Medical Corps was immensely supportive in our efforts to strengthen the ties with other countries. You'd be surprised to find out how many genin from Sunagakure have the potential to become medic ninja!" Shizune answered as she beamed.

I smiled in return, but not necessarily about the mission. In reality, I was just grateful I was at _last_ having a decent conversation with a woman not interested in my love life. My home was no relief with my mother and work was no better with Ino and Tsunade-sama practically interrogating me on my breaks. Indeed, it was a treat to finally talk with someone and not have to reveal anything.

"So…Sakura, Tsunade-sama informed me this morning that Gai's team was injured during their mission…"

I cringed and nearly wanted to glare at the older woman for bringing last night back into my mind.

"She said she sent you on _your_ first mission to retrieve Lee…" she began, my awkwardness not even fazing her. "How did it go? Were you nervous?"

I shrugged and opened the door leading to my instructor's office. "I guess…I-I mean it's not like it was something serious or anything…" I mumbled, attempting to make the terrifying mission sound trivial.

"That's not what **_I_** heard the nurses whispering about today." Shizune said, eyeing the deep colored bruises on my wrists.

I silently cursed myself for not thinking logically about my choice of apparel. Why I had decided to wear my usual shirt instead of a damn sweater I did not know.

'_Well…wearing a sweater during summer **might** have looked a **bit** suspicious…not to mention **stupid** with all the nurses staring at-'_

"But anyway, I'm just glad that Tsunade-sama thinks you're finally ready. I know how much you've wanted to go on a mission since you started your training…"

I could only nod, passively listening to whatever it was she was saying.

"M-hm..m-hm…" I said as she went on about other things. I opened the final door to the office and stared at the scene in front of me.

A mop of blonde hair, half-hidden from two folded arms supporting it, lied on a desk. All I could see besides that was a hunched back wearing a green robe slowly rising and descending with quiescent breaths. One of my eyes twitched, but I said nothing.

"Tsunade-sama?" Shizune whispered, gently shaking her limp shoulder to wake our instructor.

She waved Shizune's hand off and moaned as she woke from her stupor. With a languid hand, she seemed to motioned for us to sit. Papers needing to be read and signed were scattered on her desk as she tried to organize them. It did not matter whether it was her own office or the hospital's. Tsunade-sama would _still_ find a way to keep everything in disarray. A rather obvious small trail of drool on the side of her lip told us she had been napping again instead of working. I rolled my eyes and Shizune sighed.

Just another morning.

"Good morning, I was just uh…finishing up some work." the Sannin said with a yawn.

We halfheartedly returned the greeting and sat on the chairs in front of her desk.

"Sakura here…before I forget it." Tsunade muttered as she handed me a thick folder. "It has the exercises I would like you to do and the room numbers of patients I want you to give a check up on."

I accepted the folder without complaint despite the fact that most of those patients were under _her_ care and not mine.

"And be sure to tell Naruto not to bother his new 'roommate' too much." She added with a hint of amusement.

I paused to give her a puzzled look, but again said nothing. (I would probably find out later in the day anyway.) Sure enough, the folder contained various papers filled with patients' names, conditions, medications, allergies, and everything else I would need for their check ups. My eyes briefly scanned over the papers before they rested on my instructor's face. She held a listless expression that said nothing, but I knew it meant she wished to inform me of something I would probably find unpleasant. (It was probably a favor of some kind.) Patiently, I seemed to stare back at her, _daring_ her to speak. Her lips parted, but merely to release a heavy sigh. Her eyes reverted to her paperwork as a sign of dismissal to our duties for the day.

'_She **better** not have placed **him** under my care.' _

With a brusque force that I had not intended to use, I shoved the chair behind me. The friction between its legs and the tile let out a deafening screech that nearly startled both women in front of me. Without so much as an apology, I walked out the door and slammed it.

She wouldn't…she _couldn't_!

Brushing the vile thought aside, I fingered through the folder for the first room I needed to visit. Nurses idly chatting by the halls quickly stopped in their tracks when they saw me, it was as though they feared me (more than usual.) I paid them no mind as I found the check ups page Tsunade had sloppily written for me.

APPOINTMENT: 8:30 A.M.

PATIENT: UZUMAKI, NARUTO

RM # 109

FURTHER INFORMATION LISTED BELOW:

The hallways echoed with my groan. Just the _thought_ of having to deal with my loud teammate was enough to tell me my day of work would cease to be facile. Even if we no longer trained together, the blonde-haired boy would find me and _somehow_ find a way to irritate me. I silently thanked Tsunade as I read 'MAY BE RELEASED TODAY IF CONDITION IS IMPROVED' under all the information.

"Room…room…room…" I mumbled as I made my way through the different floors in the hospital.

"SHUT UP! I CAN SO KICK YOUR ASS!"

It seemed Naruto was already awake.

It did not take me long to find the room since his continuous yells and sharp insults made all the nurses stop and stare at the closed door where he rested.

'_Now who could he be yelling at?' _

As I pondered this, a surge of panic rushed through my mind and heart, nearly stopping the latter. I gulped as my hand nervously took hold of the doorknob and grasped it tightly. The nurses, probably feeling a tinge of sympathy for me, gazed on with a look of curiosity as to what I would do. It was tempting to ignore the yells emitting from behind the door and walk away just as it was _equally_ tempting to go back home and sulk around my bed like a sick child. For the third time since last night, I found myself bereft of courage to face the two people in the next room.

"God help Tsunade if Naruto's new 'roommate' is that bastard." I said through gritted teeth. If I ever saw him again, I did not know what I would do.

It seemed my teacher's cruelty had no limits.

"You are so irritating Naruto." was the calm response I heard to the blonde's gauche remarks.

I cocked an eyebrow when I realized it wasn't Lee who was behind that door. (Surprisingly, that wasn't enough to relieve my anxiety.)

"Um…excuse me…Sakura-san?" one of the nurses interrupted my thoughts as she tapped my shoulder. "You might want to be give those two their check ups later on in the day…that new boy in there has made all the nurses in charge of him terribly frightened." She warned.

I tried not to smirk as I wondered who it could be. "Who is he?"

The nurse bit her bottom lip, looking as if she was sworn to secrecy not to tell. "None of the nurses can stand him…I do hope Tsunade-sama placed him under your care. I can't remember his name, but…he came in last night awfully injured…you couldn't even recognize his face! It took Tsunade-sama over an hour to heal him before she tended to their teacher…she even-"

"Does he have creepy eyes?" I asked, tired of hearing the nurse's traumatic experience.

A short nod of her head was all I needed to be sure of the boy's identity.

'_Neji…'_

"So why's he in _there_?" I inquired, puzzled as to why he was sharing a room with the person he _least_ liked.

"Apparently that boy had tried to escape last night…needless to say, Tsunade-sama wasn't too happy about it. I heard that she had threatened the boy earlier, but I suppose he didn't care. Serves him right for scaring all the nu-"

I had decided to cut off the conversation with the woman as I flung the door open. The nurse could only gape at me as I loudly shut it. Facing Neji's wrath seemed more bearable than having to listen to the woman's rambling.

"Naruto! GET BACK TO YOUR BED!" I barked my order as I witnessed the boy on top of a still injured Neji. The Hyuga didn't _look_ injured, (considering he had Naruto's _throat_ clutched in his hand.)

"B-but-AGH! Sakura! He-ACK!" was all Naruto could choke out with his speech deeply impaired by the other boy. He was currently pulling at the neck of Neji's hospital gown.

"NOW!" I snapped, "Before I wring BOTH your throats!"

Fearfully obediently, Naruto was the first to retreat and jump back to his bed. He pulled the sheets over his body in a futile attempt to hide from me. Neji scoffed and indignantly rested back on his pillows with his arms crossed in front of his chest.

"I have no idea what Tsunade was thinking when she made the two of _you_ have a room together…she should know by now how you guys _get_!" I muttered angrily as I pulled the sheets off Naruto and watched him instinctively curl up in a fetal position to protect himself.

'_Like **that'll** help.' _

"So…how are your wounds Naruto?" I asked, trying to allay my fury.

"Fine Sakura! I just don't know why they have to keep me in here for so long…especially with _HIM_!" he nearly hissed the last part out like poison as he pointed an accusing finger at Neji.

The calmer of the two boys just smirked derisively before turning his attention to the only open window in the room.

"Well…they have a reason…we don't want you to go off on another mission and be too weak to fight do we?" I asked him like a child as I whipped out my stethoscope and otoscope to check his overall health. After taking his temperature and inspecting his wounds, I assumed Naruto would live to fight another day. Joy.

"Guess not." Naruto answered while giving me one of my favorite grins. "Then who would protect the village? Certainly not _Neji_!" he added with spite.

I shifted my view to see what Neji's response would be, but saw him sitting motionless by the bed. It was as though he had not even _heard_ us. He mumbled something that was nearly inaudible.

"What was that?" I went over to his bed and was tempted to sit down with him. He might have been a hardass, but he held such a rare look of concern in his face that captivated my attention. His eyes wavered, but quickly went back to their usual hostile and reserved pale orbs in seconds.

"How are my…teammates?" he asked again with a clear voice.

I shrugged and looked through my folder, scanning over several pages before I realized I had their names for an appointment on my list.

"I will tell you as soon as I check up on them." I assured, amazed that my master had entrusted me with Gai's health as well. The last thing I had heard about him was that he was still in intensive care.

'_He must finally be in a stable condition if he's under my care.'_

I felt Neji's eyes pierce my own as I continued to study my folder. Tsunade was going all out, (she had even given me my favorite person to give a check up!) My eye twitched once more at seeing Lee's name hastily written on the paper.

'_Who else has an appointment? Hana Inuzuka, Kakashi Sensei, Choji, some guy whose last name is Namiashi…jeeze Tsunade-sama is taking the entire day off for all I know!' _I thought bitterly as I read names from the never-ending list.

"Thank you."

I quickly looked up from my paper, alarmed from Neji's words. Any form of gratitude seemed foreign and almost creepy coming from him. His face held no smirk, no cocky glare, and no menacing eyes. It only held a simple expression of appreciation solely directed at me. I smiled awkwardly at him, not quite knowing how to react to this whimsical mood.

"Uh, you're welcome." I muttered, then turned to Naruto who was still sulking on his bed. "And you can leave now if you want…you're good to go until you get beat up again." I added as I checked off his name on my list.

My hyperactive teammate nearly jumped off the bed in joy when he heard this. With a hasty kiss to my forehead and a glare directed at Neji, he bolted out the door as though he were a prisoner set free. (This was probably the case since being stuck together in the same room.)

"Naruto…" I warned, feeling a vein pop in my head.

Within seconds, the idiot returned after having realized he was still wearing his hospital gown. He jerked his clothes off the hangers in the closet and shouted an earsplitting "THANKS SAKURA!" as he dashed across the hall.

His rapid footsteps eventually retreated and faded away, leaving Neji and me alone to face an awkward silence. After a few moments had passed, he reclined on the bed and shoved his pillows away as though they angered him. I felt like there was nothing I needed to say when he began to stare at the white ceiling. A pensive look about him put me on edge as I continued to gawk at him intently. Something horribly wrong had happened on their mission, something that not even the genius could cope with in his thoughts. He had yet to tell me any information and did not seem ready to do so now. Without even thinking it over, I sat down on the edge of the bed and waited for him to speak. Neji suddenly lifted his head, surprised by the shift of weight in the mattress.

"What. Are. You. Doing?" he asked, each syllable satiated with disbelief.

I shrugged, giving him an honest answer seeing as how I did not know myself.

"What were you thinking about just now?"

After giving me a puzzled look, he tilted his head back on the bed and rested an arm over his forehead.

"None of your business."

As though he had missed something, his head rose from the mattress again and inspected something in me. My blood froze.

"Where did you get those bruises on your wrists?"

I quickly covered them, but felt exposed to the world. The bed shifted again when I rose from it and walked towards the door.

"None of your business."

With that harsh retort, I opened the door and exited the room. There was no use talking to him at this point.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The afternoon sunlight had flooded in through the open windows of the hospital by the time I was _halfway_ done with my appointments and duties. With my thumb and index finger, I rubbed my weary eyes in an attempt to forget about my drowsiness. Sleep was something my body had long forgotten at night and yearned for during the daytime. A familiar silence filled the entire hospital as I walked through the halls to find Tenten's room. The only sound that pierced it was my intermittent yawns. All the nurses had gone on lunch break save for me and I was left to finish the rest of the duties with an empty stomach. It was not as if I could object to the matter since I had long forgotten about nourishment as well. I didn't need it.

I didn't _want_ it.

"Sakura-san, Tsunade-sama wanted to inform you that that young girl who came in last night has been moved to another room." One of the few nurses on duty said to me as I arrived to find an empty bed she was making.

"What? Why was she moved? Is she all right?" I asked, feeling the nauseating panic take over my body once more.

The nurse gave a short laugh and placed a pillow on the newly made bed. "Oh, don't worry, that girl is fine…she just asked if she could be moved to a room with a window."

"…Oh…and what of their sensei?"

"Thank goodness for Tsunade-sama, she stayed up all night in the emergency room until he was out of intensive care. He should be in a different room as well."

I gave a sigh of relief at the pleasant news. There was also a tinge of sympathy towards my teacher, but I tried to shrug it off in vain. She now had a reason to be lying face down on her desk; she was _exhausted_ from having saved his life. Again, I tried to ignore the fact and crammed it in the corners of my mind. Everyone had to make sacrifices in this line of work. That's what she had taught me from the very beginning of my training.

"Thank you." I said as I took the slip of paper containing my patients new room numbers and began my search anew.

In a matter of minutes, I was standing outside a room with bold numbers marking 162.

I did not hesitate to open _this_ door.

"Tenten?" I asked before laying my eyes on the room.

A smile tugged at my lips when I found her sitting on her bed and staring at the large view through the window. Her head had not turned to acknowledge me.

"Tenten?" I loudly repeated.

Her hair was down, revealing a wavy cascade of chocolate colored hair that nearly reached her elbows. She wore a white hospital gown and seemed to be hugging her knees, but remained silent even after I had addressed her. I quietly took a few steps toward her and laid a hand on her shoulder.

As though she had been ripped from her thoughts, she jumped at the slight physical contact and frantically turned around to face me.

"SAKURA? Oh…I'm so sorry…I-I didn't know you were here."

I grinned and sat by the bed, elated to see her after all this time. "That's all right…how are you?"

She awarded me with a demure smile, but appeared as though she wanted to turn back and face the window. "F-fine…I suppose…I've been waiting for a medic nin to come in and give me a check up."

Her voice was quiet and lacked its usual amicable tone.

I decided not to question it as I rested on the bed and plastered on a pleasant face. "Well, guess what? You're under my care now!" I said, displaying obvious joy for having her as my patient.

Tenten raised an eyebrow at my random comment. She _had_ been gone a long time.

"I'm a…I'm a medic nin now…I study under Tsunade-sama." I said quietly, loathing for some reason to admit this.

My friend cocked her head, but then smiled. "Really? That's great!"

I could still hear her feigned cheerfulness.

"So tell me, how are you feeling?"

Tenten shrugged and pointed at her bandage wrapped forehead. "Like I got slammed into a brick wall."

I nodded and scribbled down notes on my folder. "But have you felt any discomfort or pain that would require medication?" I asked as I paused long enough for an answer.

She shook her head and studied the window. A moment passed until she spoke.

"I-I've…missed you…Sakura."

I stopped writing and glanced at Tenten who had returned to the same pose I had found her in when I arrived. As I placed the folders aside and sat up straight, my mind casually reminded me of its need of information about the mission.

'_**No**,'_ I scolded myself, _'I'm not here for that…I'm here to help her.' _

"I've missed you too Tenten. When Tsunade-sama told me you were hurt you have no idea how worried I was."

"Oh…thank you. Say…Sakura…how are-"

"They're fine," I interrupted what I knew she wanted to ask, "I heard Gai Sensei is in a stable condition so he's all right. As for Neji, he is back to his usual mordant self."

"But what about…what about Lee?"

Her question went unanswered when reticence possessed me.

"H-how is he? Please…please don't tell me that he-that he…" Tenten slowly supplicated for her friend's survival.

"He's not dead…but I…I still haven't gone to check up on him. Only he and Gai Sensei are left on my list of appointments." I assured her, wanting desperately to have the decency to provide her with his wellbeing.

The girl who hardly seemed recognizable with her long hair stared down at her knees and buried her face in them. "…Oh…okay."

Something was wrong. Again, I felt ignored as her eyes left me.

"Tenten…" I soothed, placing a hand on top of her back, "if there is anything you need…I'm here for you. I will do everything I can to ensure that your friends will be fine."

Tenten looked up long enough to murmur a small "thank you" and smiled. She took my hand in hers and gave it a tight friendly squeeze before releasing it. Being clueless as to what to do once she let go, I took it as a sign to leave and let her gather her thoughts. My friend uttered a whimper of disapproval as she realized what my intentions were. Her warm smile slowly faded away into a thin quivering line of fear. Eyes that were once welcoming were now filled with a silent terror. I peered at her questioningly and gently took her arm as a sign of comfort. She looked at my hand and then back at me, making me wonder why she was acting in such a way. I noticed a growing anxiety about her that was almost torture to watch. Slowly, she tore down the façade of a healing friend and shattered her smile.

She collapsed into my arms and began to sob uncontrollably.

"S-sakura! I…I thought I was going to die! I s-seriously d-did! Wh-when I--when I saw Neji fall down I-I-I just lost it! I…I didn't know what to _do_! I-I didn't know what t-to DO! Th-they…they took Lee away into a room a-and…a-and I-I heard th-these horrible s-sounds! G-gai Sensei-he…he w-wasn't there…he said he'd _be_ there! Th-there w-were these t-terrible screams. Th-there was this…this loud cracking sound…l-like old wood a-and…a-and more screaming. Sakura…I-!"

No more was needed to be said as I held on Tenten and muffled her hysterical words against my chest. I didn't understand, but I wanted to let her cry for as long as she wanted. I didn't _want_ to hear anymore if it meant making her remember whatever gruesome thing that had happened. Her whole body violently shook as she continued to mourn for her teammates, her comrades, her _friends_. Every word that came out of her created another wave of tears and sobs. At that moment, I knew I hated something more to add to my list. It was something that I hated more than being alone, more than mornings, more than Sasuke's derision, and more than anything else I could think to hate in that sick mind of mine.

I hated having to watch a friend cry.

"Shh, Tenten, shh." I placated her, trying to make sense out of what she had told me.

I hated it.

A heavy realization slowly sunk in when I remembered how Ino would hug me if I cried back when we were young. I remembered feeling an overwhelming warmth inside me that drove away my childhood problems. That is just what I did; I embraced Tenten in hopes of making her feel better as I often did whenever I was hugged. In time, her sobs turned to short gasps, her gasps subsided to sniffles, and her sniffles became a pacified silence. She firmly kept her arms wrapped around my waist as though I would disappear her if she didn't. The soft face I held in one hand was drenched in tears and her eyes were like glass from the weeping. There was a lump in my throat I couldn't swallow as my eyes made contact with her own.

"Th-thank you…S-sakura….I-I….I n-needed th-that." Her voice still shook, but seemed confident now that she had released some of her inner turmoil.

I could only nod, still bewildered over the scene that had taken place. Her breaths were uneven, but she tried to speak once more.

"I-I'm sorry…about…you shouldn't have seen that." She muttered as she tried to collect her composure.

I shook my head and took both of Tenten's hands in mine reassurance. "No…I didn't want to ask you…but I'm glad you told me if it helped."

"Would you…" she thought and bit her lip, pondering on how to say what she wanted. "Would you…that is…would you mind if I told you?"

Despite the recent panic, I couldn't help but feel _elated_ that someone was **_finally_** willing to tell me what had happened.

"You will tell me when you are ready."

"I'm ready _now_, I want to-"

"No, you're not. You will tell me when you've had some sleep."

"What do you _think_ I've been doing? I've _been_ knocked out up until a few hours ago!" she began to protest before I cut her off yet again.

"Yes, but I don't want you overexerting yourself with this thing just yet. Just…just promise me you'll rest and you'll tell me about the mission tomorrow."

Surrendering to my advice, she slumped back down on the bed in exasperation.

"I'm…I'm just glad I'm back home…you have no idea how glad I am…" she whispered as she covered her eyes with both her palms.

Convinced that she would be fine, I got off the bed and closed my folder. I was now ready to face my _favorite_ person out of Team Gai.

'_Crap…I need to see their teacher first.' _

I opened the door, ready to leave now that Tenten was somewhat calmed.

"H-hey…S-sakura?"

"…Yes?"

"Don't tell Neji I cried."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Perhaps it was the sound of the ECG softly beating through my ears, the fluids from the IV stand slowly dripping down their tubes, or the beeping of various monitors around him made him appear like he was barely living…whatever it was, I couldn't stand the sight of their Sensei in this condition.

'_What could've happened to you?' _

Gai Sensei, the man who I suspected was even stronger than my _own_ Sensei, laid motionless on the bed in utter defeat. His shallow and faint breathing making his chest rise painfully slow was the only sign of life I saw in the man. His nonrebreather mask created a small transient mist inside it as he took his labored and raspy breaths. Each he took sounded like it was his last.

The check up was finished as quickly as possible. I was sick of this. _Sick_. I frantically grabbed my folder, but found myself barely able to grasp it as my legs shot through the door. No matter how far I ran there was no way to get Gai's image out of my mind. I couldn't escape that.

I ran in vain.

I ran wanting to escape the fact that Maito Gai, Konoha's weirdest youth obsessed jonin, was lying beaten and unconscious on a hospital bed.

I ran _wanting_ to believe that my friends' Sensei would rise out of bed the next morning to do countless laps and challenge Kakashi to trivial contests.

I ran even after my chest felt like fire from my ragged swigs of air. I ran long after my legs became exhausted in the labyrinth-like halls of the hospital.

I ran and ran…and crashed against something.

A stinging sensation shot through my rear as I stumbled into the cool hard tile. My throbbing legs begged for relief as I tried to rise but came crashing back down on the slippery floor. Through the frenzy, I felt my face flood with shame as I heard a small grunt of pain. I scrambled to my feet and muttered an apology, expecting to find an irritated nurse but finding two unnerving black eyes instead. I wanted to talk, but choked on some invisible object in my mouth and began to cough. The thick folder that I had firmly grasped in my hands had fallen on the ground and its contents along with it. A rain of paper showered around us as I tried to calm my coughing fit.

Lee stood in front of me, towering over my stature even with the clutch supporting his weight.

"Are you…?" The boy did not find the words to finish his question.

I shoved him aside and ran before he could.

There was no way I could look at him and not remember the blood, his friends, the pain, my bruises, the sleepless nights, and his Sensei. I bolted and ran down the stairs, completely forgetting about the elevators. If nurses or Tsunade caught a glimpse of me racing across the halls and stairs, I did not care. Escaping out of this hell was what my legs wanted to do. Twilight was tugging at my heels as I sped through the busy streets of my village. To people walking by I was but a blur. My shadow danced beneath me as the last rays of light were engulfed by night. If I ran anymore, I feared I would collapse on the floor.

And that's what I did.

My house was right in front of me, mere _yards_ away…and yet…my legs could _barely_ take me to the door. I managed to go inside my room after practically having to crawl up the stairs. As soon as I looked at my bed, I mustered a weary smile and fell upon it. At that moment…I didn't give a damn about my job. I didn't want to know _anything_ about it. If there were check ups, file sorting, or training of any kind then it would wait until tomorrow. Right now…I _needed_ sleep.

I did not care about this stupid job. Not anymore.

Exhausted, I pulled the blankets over me and turned my body over to face the ceiling. I tightly shut my eyes when it made me think of Neji. That idiot expected me to help him and yet _he_ would not budge when it came to talking about the mission. My mind would not fade him out, he would always remain just like the ceiling that seemed to mock me. It would remain in my memory like the beaten helpless image of Tenten and Gai Sensei. I opened my eyes again and found myself wondering why I was such a fool.

A dry chuckle escaped my lips when I could find no reason.

'_I'm a fool in so many ways. If only I could have helped them more…if only that **idiot** wouldn't have changed. If only I could've accepted his offer…if only…'_

I closed my eyes shut and mused about these things-these now _unattainable_ things.

Things that were once possible in some happy forgotten childhood.

Things that could have existed had it not been for me.

Things that I wanted even _now._

I thought and thought…

Until sleep came.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I'm sorry if it seemed like Lee had like NO part in this chapter. I just felt like I would much rather save it for the next chapter and then focus SOLELY on Sakura and him. Plus, I felt like I would have rushed things. Anyway, expect a quick update since I officially no longer have practices, competitions, meetings, OR that much homework! SENIORITIS, HERE I COME!!


	20. Explanation for my absence

Hello 'alo! As you may or not noticed, there's been a lack of updates from me. This is due partly because my damn computer was so kind as to have a complete and utter breakdown and because all the pieces of the new chapter were inside of it. I am deeply sorry for this. I will fix the computer at once. (I'm currently using one at my new college just so I could post this.) I do not think it will take me long since we NEED the computer at home but I was told it wouldn't be ready for another two weeks or so. I'm sorry something like this had to happen. Now all my stories and work are completely erased. I can't help but laugh instead of cry or scream though (it's just one of those moments where the situation is more funny than it is tragic.) lol Ah well…as long as I don't get hit on the head and have a severe case of amnesia, I SHOULD still have the story up as soon as I'm able. I'm sorry for this, I will hurry my ass off to fix it at once! Take care!

p.s. sorry if the summarized version of my problem is crappy, I just have a VERY limited amount of time on the computer. Anywho, I will have to write everything by hand until I get it typed.

It's back to the stone age….


	21. Misinterpreted Apprehensions

Hello alo-and _NO_-I'm not dead! I just _finally_ managed to climb myself out of a hell hole called "The Stone Age." Seriously…having no computer was the worse thing ever….well not really…if anything I did things that were more productive. Well, I'm finally out of high school and currently enrolled in college. Summer was like heaven since I went on trips with friends and family. OH! I also got my first job! I basically get PAID to listen to live classical music, drink tea, and eat little pieces of chocolate. I also got to teach art classes to five year olds. (I almost felt like Iruka…and I had _more_ than my fair share of Narutos in those classes.) But I love those spawns of the devil. Well aside from that, I love my job. In the meantime, I had to put ideas for the chapter in this thin material called "_paper_." (I don't think the word has existed in my vocabulary since I got the computer.) Anyway…enough with my ranting, words cannot express how much I've missed every one of you! I would like to dedicate this chapter to everyone who took the time out of their day to review or put me in their favorite stories/author list! Thank you so much for your support and patience! This chapter is for you. So…without further waiting…read, enjoy, and recommend!

**Misinterpreted Apprehensions **

The closest expression resembling amusement crossed his features in the form of an ambiguous smirk. Thin lips threatened to part and release a dry chuckle. His back slightly quivered to suppress the urge. Although the boy was never one for laughter like Naruto was, he had _ample_ methods for jeering at people.

"So you basically came crashing down like some idiot and then just _ran_ to your house?"

I tried not to cringe when the almost berating question was asked.

"You probably don't even know if it was really _him_ do you?" another voice chimed.

I shrugged, feeling the humiliation of the topic rush through my face as I tried to eat in peace.

"Thanks….really…this is _really_ cheering me up right now." I grumbled miserably to the two men sitting by my side.

How I had managed to garner enough courage to share my unpleasant experience in the hospital with another being was beyond my understanding. I did whatever I could to not make contact with my teammates' eyes. (They would only chide me even _more_ than they already were.) I was soon filled with regret for allowing the idiots to broach the uneasy subject while I was _obviously_ not prepared to discuss it. Men had a special way of castigating a woman whenever they did something foolish. In this case, both Sasuke's and Naruto's brutal honesty was pounding me to the ground in embarrassment.

My broody teammate looked up at the roof of the ramen booth we were in and continued to smirk. "You are such a _loser_."

The callous insult, which was long ago solely reserved to describe the hyperactive blonde in our group, was now being directed at _me_. Needless to say, Sasuke was trying to make my chagrin last for as long as he could.

'_Last time I ask __**them**__ for advice.'_ I thought, seething at my naïveté.

What had once appeared as a clandestine and earnest plea for advice from two supposedly _trustworthy_ childhood friends had quickly turned out to be the public death of my dignity and shredding of my confidence. (I was starting to think they were _enjoying_ it.)

'_Well, __**this **__looks appetizing.' _I joked to myself as I looked at the questionable breakfast before me. How Naruto managed to live off ramen every day of his life and not develop an antipathy for it was a wonder to me. (Then again, my vociferous friend currently devouring the noodles was often labeled as anything _but _normal.) Lacking my appetite from the messy sight, I looked up from my bowl to take my mind off his loud slurping. The streets were thick with people, all pushing and shoving like mindless individuals to get to their chosen destination.

"You should do something if he's bothering you that much." Sasuke remarked in a rather hostile manner as he poked his meal with mild interest.

The solemn boy's succinct comment was enough to rouse my spite once more.

"Oh, and what _should_ I do? It's not like I can just _talk_ to him! I can barely even _stomach_ to _look_ at the bastard!" I raged while finding out my composure was now nonexistent. "That idiot tried to-!"

I was forced to stop in the midst of my tirade lest a certain brackish liquid found its way down my throat. Apparently without warning, a soggy medley containing limpid solids showered above us, spraying our faces and covering our clothes with half chewed bits of noodles and pork. Pieces of it exuded down my hair, making me bite my tongue in silent fury. It was all I could do from screaming in a fit of disgust. While I was trying to stop the protruding vein in my forehead from bursting, a slightly embarrassed snicker was heard on the right side of us in the ramen booth.

"Sorry guys…I uh kinda got a bit surprised by how you were saying that stuff about Bushy Brows." Naruto apologized with a huge grin as he rubbed the back of his head.

Sasuke and I completely turned our heads in a fit of unspoken irritation at the idiot trying to cough out the rest of his meal. We were all but eager to shoot venomous glares and give bone crunching beatings to the blonde ramen culprit.

Upon realizing our malicious intent, Naruto quickly offered about two handfuls of napkins at us in an attempt to appease our foul moods. "I-I-I mean…jeeze Sakura, don't you think you're being just a little too harsh on Lee? I mean-from what I saw with Neji, the poor guy has been through a lot with his team already." He stuttered as he tried to save himself from a bloody beating by prying further into my life.

I furiously snatched the napkins out of his hands and offered some to Sasuke (who still looked as though he would spare him no lenity once I was gone.)

"Nevermind…forget it." I mumbled despairingly as I dried my face.

There was no point in telling them anything at this point.

"But Sakura, don't you want to see Lee and-"

"So, what are you two doing today?" I quickly cut off Naruto before he could persuade me otherwise.

Sasuke slowly closed his eyes and ran his fingers through his now humid hair while he thought. "Probably train with the idiot since no one else will." He answered coolly as he opened his eyes again and looked at me.

I found myself smiling at the most stolid of my teammates. Although Sasuke would always possess the brooding attitude that appealed to endless women and have striking features that seemed to entice one even more as he matured, his movements and poses now seemed almost… _predictable_ to me. I shook my head and chuckled when I realized I had known Sasuke for far too long if I was finding him mundane. He and I had somewhat reconciled our relationship, but there were often fleeting moments between us that made me wonder of memories that were once long ago attainable. He _had_ grown a bit affable after having noted my sudden loath for Lee before he left, but I doubted the possibility that it would lead to anything. At the moment, _both_ my teammates were too aggravating to be seen as potential dates.

"I'm SO going to kick your ass today Sasuke…just watch!" Naruto exclaimed as he ordered another bowl of ramen to add to the rising mountain of empty bowls he had in front of him.

"Sure…loser." Was the calm retort.

I had to suppress a chuckle at their juvenile behavior. No matter how old we became, I doubt there would ever be a single day when they would be genial towards each other and not exchange their daily 'banter.'

"Sakura…do you have work today?" Sasuke asked in a low voice not meant to be heard by Naruto's ears.

I banged my forehead on top of the table and groaned at the harsh realization he made me have. "Yes." I whined pitifully.

"So?"

"So _what_?" I hissed.

"What are you going to do?" he asked with a tone that _seemingly_ held picayune interest.

"Ignore him." I said, wanting desperately to end the conversation.

"Suit yourself."

"Well I-" I found myself not being capable of finishing the discussion with a witty remark. Sasuke had either finally become weary of persuading me or he knew me too well to believe I would truly eschew Lee. (In this case it was probably the latter.) If anything, his fabricated lack of concern was the reason why I could find no words to end our petty fight. Releasing a disgusted sigh, I roughly pushed my chair aside and paid for my scarcely touched meal. At times…I think I hated Sasuke more than Lee.

'_Well…at least he hasn't tried to kill me…at least not __**yet**__.' _

I made a mental note to rebuff any paperwork from Tsunade concerning Lee and took my leave.

"I'll see you two later then…and try not to kill each other." I _half_ joked. (Whenever those two trained together it was always a strong possibility.)

All I received in response was muffled slurping and a grunt.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As I walked toward the hospital, I tried to stretch the road in front of me by taking my time and watching the picturesque scenery. A chilly wind caressed my bare arms, alarming me that summer was nearly finished. The last of the aestival leaves danced along the side of the road in flurrying circles and let out crisp sounds as I crushed them beneath my feet. Wearing something warmer was among one of the things I had in mind while I rubbed the side of my shoulders. I wasn't exactly _ecstatic_ or dancing vigorously at the thought of having to go to work. There was still the predicament of my sudden disappearance of last night. Explaining my actions to Tsunade would be quite the ordeal if I wished to continue studying under her. My body shivered again at the thought of that woman's scorn.

'_I __**seriously**__ need to buy her sake or lottery tickets or something.'_ I thought in hopes of allaying her usually sour mood.

I disregarded the gifts as soon as I reminded myself that it had been _her_ who placed Lee under my care. As if my first mission retrieving him hadn't been proof enough that we were not meant to see each other, she had still insisted that I do his check ups. At first glance it would have been a relief to take care of him, but that was _before_ the bastard had disparaged me.

'_Then again…I was the one who practically __**begged**__ her to go on the mission…serves me right for wanting to help anyone…'_ I rebuked myself in irritation.

The morning was droll and uneventful as I checked up on countless patients. It seemed Shizune was up to her neck in paperwork given to her by Tsunade and was yet to be seen. Our instructor was not much help considering she spent most of her time in her office researching one thing or another. Relief swept over me from that fact since I doubted she had noticed my early escape from the hospital. I rubbed my eyes as I stifled a yawn. Despite my best efforts to find sleep at night, I could not fight off my heavy eyelids in the morning. Better yet, my _mind_ would not rest. It was often riddled with compunction and those damn rampant fears.

Fears of looking at Lee in the eye.

Fears of what to say or do.

Fears about my…feelings.

As I attempted to shake these thoughts out of my head, I came across Neji's room and glowered at the door. He was due for a few more check ups before being released since his injuries were no longer serious. I only hoped he would not try to talk to me about Lee.

I tried not to snort at what was inevitable. _'Since __**when**__ have people been courteous to me with anything concerning Lee?' _

"All right then…" I prepared myself as I turned the cool knob and walked into the poorly lit room.

If the boy was in the room then he gave me no signs of his presence. The bed was desolate, save for a crumpled blanket and pillows that have been tossed around the room in the midst of boredom. A lamp lay scattered in pieces on the floor, (the result of restless waiting I supposed.) Thick curtains covered the only window in the room and allowed miniscule light to enter it. The sense of dread and truculence hung thick in the air, making me want to shorten my visit in the small room. A slight fit of alarm rushed through my body when I realized everything appeared empty.

"N-Neji?" I stammered in fear, hoping the fool hadn't tried to run away again. (Who _knew_ who he would get stuck with as a roommate if he attempted to escape once more?)

"What?" came the answer from an unseen place in the room.

"Wh-where are you?" I asked worriedly.

My question came by as rather foolish once I realized I hadn't bothered to look on the floor that was covered by the _side_ of the bed.

As I walked around the bed and peered at the well hidden spot, I found Neji lying on the bare floor with his arms crossed behind his head. He appeared to be in an almost meditative state as he stared at the ceiling.

"Wh…what are you doing down there?" I inquired in confusion.

"The bed was uncomfortable." He stated succinctly as though it made sense.

I quirked an eyebrow at his odd response and made a note to give him a mental relaxant once this was finished.

"All…right…then." I answered cautiously as I kneeled in front of him. "I came here for your check up before-"

"Why didn't you come back yesterday?" he interrupted briskly.

"Well I uh…" I found that words had deserted me when I could only bite my lower lip in response. "It was….late…once I finished…and-"

"But you still could've come back here to tell me if they were all right." He interrupted again, his hostile eyes never meeting my own.

"Neji…" I whispered uneasily, attempting to assemble an apology.

His pale orbs finally pierced into me when he realized I was addressing him.

"_What_?" his voice was stern and dripping with animosity.

"I…I'm sorry, I didn't really get a chance to…" I mumbled in embarrassment over my reaction with Lee last night.

Again, silence took over and prolonged the torture of being in the same room as the Hyuga.

"How's Tenten?" he asked, finally realizing I knew no more than he did about Lee.

"Well, she's doing great. I wouldn't be surprised if they released her today with her attitude!" I exclaimed warmly to allay any concerns he could have for her.

It seemed as though my cheery and honest reply worked since the side of Neji's mouth lifted in the form of an almost unnoticeable smile that quickly disappeared.

"That sounds like her." He remarked quietly and stared back at the ceiling.

"Yeah…" I concluded stupidly since there was no way of stretching the conversation.

In the time that I had known Neji, I knew the thought of badinage would never appeal to him since he was so reserved. It was almost to the point where it was _comfortable_ to have him in my presence. At least…it was nothing like Lee's conversations. With him…I remembered it felt like I had to satiate a bottomless hole with words lest it swallowed me in utter discomfiture. It was best to let the content silence roll on rather than to force empty words with him. I thought of asking him about the mission, but quickly decided against it as soon as I saw him pat his shoulder where the kunai had pierced through his skin.

I was not ready to find out how he had gotten such an easily avoidable wound.

"She…hasn't said anything…has she?" he broke the silence and began another topic.

"No." I said rather quickly.

"Are you going to see Lee today?" he asked composedly.

I shrugged and got up from my stooping position to open the curtains. The dim room was not making this talk a facile thing.

"I was thinking about handing him over to another medic nin…I already have too many patients to take care of in one day." I explained tiredly.

Neji lifted himself up and sat on the floor while supporting his back against the bed. He seemed to be contemplating what I had just said.

"Do you not wish to see him?"

The question was simple…but the answer tortured my mind.

"I-I…I don't think so. Not anymore." I stammered nervously.

"Why not?" His questions were like icy daggers penetrating through my chest.

"Weren't _you_ the one who told me to just stay away from him?" I asked defensively once I realized the idiot was contradicting himself.

His gaze slowly deserted the ceiling and rested back on me, practically _daring_ me to deride him once more. My mouth quickly closed, my body instantly grew tense, and my blood froze. At that moment, I felt as though there was nothing I could say to him that he had not already seen with his near omniscient eyes. I wondered if Tenten or Lee were already used to his threatening glares. It seemed his specialty was making people feel exposed-both metaphorically _and_ literally in his case. He paid me no mind, however, and continued on with his illogical reasoning.

"I…I don't think he despises you as much as he would like. It's just…not like him." He began slowly as though he had to swallow his pride to say each word.

"Oh? Sorry Neji, but I think the Lee we know now _hardly_ possesses any of his kind characteristics from when we were young. That Lee is _dead_ to me now." I nearly seethed from the virulent memories of him.

"You don't understand as usual Sakura," he scolded as though I were a child, "he hates you, but the more the fool tried to shut you out, the more he became approachable to us."

My blood boiled at the thought of being used simply to accommodate Neji.

"Then WHY?! Why?! If he hated me then why did he bother spending time with me?! Why did he bother even _talking_ to me if he hated me?! If he-if he hated me so much then why did he let me k-!" realizing I had said enough, I quickly clamped my mouth shut by slapping both my hands against it. There was no way I would ever tell Neji of anything I did to Lee. The overnight stays, the lunches…the _kiss_…they weren't important, not anymore. I doubt he'd even be interested in hearing it anyway.

'_Damn physical contact…' _

"Those…are questions that only Lee can answer. It's not my place to say." Neji said, probably feeling perturbed by my sudden outburst.

"Well, I'm not going to get a chance to ask him since I'm kicking him off my work schedule." I answered acridly as I pulled out a stethoscope from a nearby cabinet.

At that moment, Neji quirked an eyebrow and looked at me as though he was aware of something that I wasn't.

"What's that look for?" I asked, almost wanting to brandish my stethoscope menacingly at his face.

A stifled chuckle escaped from Neji's lips as he finally ascertained something that would work to his advantage.

"Shizune-san already gave me my health check. She figured the least she could do was visit a few of your patients while Gai and Lee were in your care. She knows how much you've wanted to see them." he explained with a rare smirk of triumph.

God I hated him.

As I tried to ignore his haughty attitude, I found myself wondering if I was just the hapless victim of an insidious scheme to confront Lee.

"He doesn't want to see me…that much I know." I reasoned as I tried to find a way to avoid Lee for one more day.

"He does…though he may not admit it." He said with his usual stoic voice.

"What makes you think that?"

"During our mission, things he said…things he did."

"Oh, well THAT is being really precise." I mocked his conjecture as I made my way toward the door to exit.

"You'll know what I mean once you knock some sense into him."

I couldn't help but scoff at his empty remarks. He was an idiot if he thought a simple visit would get rid of Lee's rancor towards me.

"One more thing," he added but paused in the middle of his sentence. He appeared to be contemplating a way I could understand him.

"That night…Lee…he wasn't himself. Whatever he said…whatever he _did_…it wasn't him."

As I stepped foot out the door, the Hyuga's persistent last words rung in my head.

They almost made me wonder.

"I don't care…he's not my problem anymore." I answered softly.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As luck would have it, the sun had long descended and given way to night by the time I was staring at Lee's door. I was bereft of company save for my instructor and her assistant who were probably locked up in an office somewhere in the hospital with tedious paperwork. A complete silence surrounded me, _suffocated_ me. The gnarled knots in my stomach had never ceased to nauseate me throughout the day. Neji's words still reverberated in my mind and pestered me to no end. A bead of sweat rolled down the side of my cheek as my hands tightly clutched the medicine he needed to take. I felt my heart wanting to explode out of my ribcage. Thoughts filled with doubt raced through my mind while I fought with myself on what to do. What waited for me inside was something I did not want to face. I didn't want to deal with the inevitable rejection, the hesitant moments, the vehement words, and hostile stares.

I wasn't ready for it.

As I battled with my body for control of my movements, I found myself in a quandary for which there was no escape. Why I hadn't _simply_ handed him over to some other unfortunate medic was beyond me. Perhaps it was some masochistic curiosity that forced me to see him. Whatever it was and whether I was prepared to face it or not, I would need to see him. It was the only way I could cope with what I had done.

'_I'm such an idiot for doing this.' _

The near antediluvian door creaked noisily as I pushed it open to reveal yet another dark room that matched Neji's. The window's curtains were separated though, and _still_ a diminutive amount of light from the moon dared flood into the room. A bed could barely be distinguished with the darkened visibility and a lump of some sort was on top of it. My heart completely stopped beating for the briefest of moments and my weakened legs hesitated as I took my first step and nearly froze.

'_Move move move move move move…' _was the never-ending mantra that was inserted into my mind as I realized what the form resting on the bed was.

Gathering all the audacity possible under my circumstances, I licked my arid lips and took a wobbling step around the bed. The dim form of his body was completely motionless and looked as if it was in a state of heavy sleep. I was now mere _inches_ away from what appeared to be his back. I wished desperately that my mind would kick in and give me my body back.

I had come this far…I needed to force myself the rest of the way.

Completely ignoring the obvious signs of terror my body was sending me, I coerced myself to move once more. My eyes blinked rapidly to process what stupidity I was committing. My hand, being ever so tentative not to rouse Lee from his sleep, slowly came to rest on his surprisingly soft shoulder.

"L-lee?" I stammered, my voice nearly deteriorating.

I was suddenly overcome by a shock of fear that made me break contact with his shoulder as though it were poison. My legs, which had finally given in under my weight, had sent me crashing to the floor on my rear. It took several moments to realize what had jerked me from my terrorized state was a loud flushing noise behind me. Whatever it had been, it had been enough to send me jumping nearly two feet away from the bed. Even my frightened gasps stilled to a halt when I heard a door open in the direction of the sound. There was no way I could make myself turn around to see who or _what_ it was.

'_Holy…'_

A heavy silence possessed the room as the air around me grew still with an unbearable suspense and dread. My eyes suddenly widened twice their size when I felt a set of heavy footsteps coming towards me. The wild pounding of my heart was so loud it almost muffled the sound of the footsteps as they stopped right behind me. I couldn't help but feel numb from the unknown panic and the presence looming over me.

A deep hostile voice broke the insufferable silence.

"What are you doing here." Lee's voice didn't even sound inquisitive; his tone alone was enough to tell me he was _advising_ me to leave.

"I-I…" As cruel fate would have it, my voice had entirely forsaken me and left me to face Lee alone.

I put my voice predicament to the side as another important realization dawned on me.

'_Who the __**hell**__ is on the bed then?'_ I thought in a rush of bewilderment.

As if to answer my question, the light from the door Lee had opened allowed me a better view of the lump on the bed. I peered in closer to the bed to solve the mystery.

A couple of hefty pillows lay in the middle of the bed and nearly mocked me for my foolishness.

'_Then what was he…?-' _

My answer came as soon as I had wondered what he was doing so late at night.

The frozen blood rushing through my veins suddenly boiled and flushed to my cheeks as I voice returned. Forcing my shaking neck to move, I found myself staring at Lee's legs. Behind them, apparently, was the source of the once horrifying flushing sound.

It seemed he had just utilized the separate bathroom in the room. The lifted lid of a toilet could be seen out of the corner of my eye.

With a great deal of hesitation, my gaze eventually lifted to see his fierce and hostile black eyes. While I could only gawk blindly at the man, there was a look of pure animosity in his face that seemed to be directed solely at me. I desperately tried to match his glare, but found myself more occupied with swallowing the tight wad of anxiety that was lodged in my throat. I didn't want to appear feeble in front of him-not _now_ of all times.

"Why are you here?" his stoic question pierced the darkness once more.

My nails pierced the surface of my palms as I clenched my fists. Even now, I felt Lee still thought of me as little more than a hindrance. I would have to refrain from yelling at the idiot unless I planned to rouse everyone from their sleep.

"Check up."

My voice seemed calmer than I had intended. It had an apathy about it that nearly matched Sasuke's.

"I do not require one." Was the irate and snappy reply.

Without realizing it, I rolled my eyes at his stubbornness (though I was glad Lee could not see through the poor light of the bathroom.)

"I don't care, I still need to give you one." I responded with the same perfunctory tone.

Finding the courage to speak became less difficult as I further annoyed Lee. (It was almost _amusing_ watching him glower at this point.)

He kept quiet shortly after that and walked past me to his bed.

"Should you really be moving that much?" I asked randomly when I noticed he was unusually active for his injuries.

"Why do _you_ give a damn?" he replied mockingly.

Vulgarity aside, I found it a relief to know Lee was at _least_ talking to me. (_Anything_ was better than him completely ignoring me.)

"Well," I continued while keeping my anger in check, "I need to know how serious the wound is…how have you been feeling?"

"Fine, until you ripped my stitches apart when you knocked me over last night." He snapped back as he hid himself under the covers of the bed.

I had to cringe as I tried to imagine the excruciating pain he must've felt (though I couldn't say if I was _sorry_ for what I had done.) Thoughts of what Tsunade-sama would do to me if she ever found out pestered my mind.

'_She'd probably fire my sorry a-' _

"Why did you come?" Lee interrupted me before I could predict our merciful Hokage's punishment

"I already told you, you need a check-"

"THAT IS NOT WHAT I MEANT!" he yelled through the blankets. "WHY DID…why did you not leave me there to die?!"

I sighed as the shock of his screaming diminished faster than usual. "It was just part of the mission." I answered sternly, all but _used_ to his martyr-like behavior.

"Then why did you not _heal_ me like other medic nin? Did you have second thoughts!?" he accused rather unfairly.

I said nothing as I gathered my medical equipment and reached for the switch of a lamp. It was futile to try and explain anything to him.

"Let's turn on the lights so I can see-"

"WHY DID YOU NOT HEAL ME?!"

Lee's harsh question resonated within me as he snatched the lamp away from my grasp. He seemed to enjoy trying every morsel of my patience and bringing me to the brink of insanity. I tripped over my choice of words inside my mind and tried to utter the most decent reply. It seemed being courteous wasn't an option. _All_ my responses were vile and unspeakable. _All_ would harm both of us.

"You're not _WORTH_ healing!" I yelled back, already sick of his allegations.

My words were cruel, I knew that…but I did not plan to tell Lee I had choked and couldn't control my unstable chakra under the horrendous stress of the mission.

'_Not to mention your damn __**nude**__ body right in front of me.'_ I added mentally.

Of course I would have rather _killed_ myself than tell _him_ that.

Lee grew silent and burrowed himself deeper into the bed with the lamp. He was probably satisfied with my answer.

That idiot.

"Lee…Lee come on…I-" I tried to form a half-baked reason for him to listen.

"Get out…" he warned.

"As much as I would like to, I can't. Just…get out of bed, I want to go home already and I can't do that until I check your progress." I said wearily as I extended my hand to lift the covers off him.

"Get. _Out_." He repeated each deadly syllable.

A sharp jolt of pain rushed through my arms before I could say anything else. It resembled the same sensation I had felt back in that bloodstained bathroom. I tried to pull back and nearly growled when the strain didn't decrease. It was then that I realized the anguish was concentrated on my wrists…on the still fresh bruises to be exact. The sudden pang beseeched me to pull away from Lee's body as the medicine that was once safely clutched in my hand fell to the ground. I felt like _screaming_! Felt like yelling at Lee to stop! Instead, the inconceivable pain escaped my clenched lips in the form of a pitiful tiny whimper.

"L-lee…"

The crushing pressure was released almost immediately as soon as he noticed it was hurting me. A rustling of blankets was heard in the room and the clicking of a lamp soon followed it. Illumination filled the entire room and allowed me a better view of the man in front of me. What I thought were slight traces of worry glimmering in his eyes soon turned to a fluster of contempt.

"Wh-where….where did you get these?" he asked, inspecting my wrists as though he were in frustrated awe.

This…this wasn't right. I glared at him in a fit of rage for even _feigning_ he hadn't the slightest clue of where I had gotten the bruises.

"And why do _you_ give a damn?" I repeated his gauche question as I tried to pull away from him.

Lee, being the ninja he was, used his alacrity to clasp my hand in his and jerked me back down on the bed.

"I will ask again…'where did you get these?'" he asked menacingly as he glared at my wrists.

My mouth opened in disbelief as my odium for him flourished. His mock ignorance for my wounds wasn't the only thing that set my blood to a boil. The fact that he was willing to try it _again_ was reason enough to make me want to tear all his stitches apart and crush half his organs. I returned the fierce look at Lee and wrung my hands out of his reach. My hands, now curled into tight fists, violently shook with each moment he waited for an answer. How someone I once venerated had grown up to be such a spineless coward was beyond me. He needed a beating-needed to _die_! There was nothing more I wanted to do than give him a well-deserved slap.

And that's what I did.

"You…you DAMN IDIOT!"

My hand ached terribly from the impact as I looked at the boy whose crimsoned cheek was currently facing the opposite direction from me. The blow soon left him speechless as his fingers tentatively touched the side of his stinging face. His eyes and mouth grew wide in shock as his gaze reverted to me.

"What…what was the reason for _that_?!"

"IT WAS _YOU_ WHO GAVE THEM TO ME YOU BASTARD!" I finally screamed, not being able to contain my aversion a second longer.

At this, Lee's eyes rapidly blinked in puzzlement of what I had said, but soon turned to deadly slits. "You liar! I never laid a hand on you! I would never!" he exclaimed with an unexpected surprised tone.

I suddenly loathed Lee with renewed passion at his false words. Not only was he refusing to take responsibility for his actions, but he was willing to _lie_ to me.

"DON'T YOU GIVE ME THAT _BULL_!" I yelled, "Don't you EVER give me that!…You-you KNOW you gave me these bruises, you KNOW you're lying!"

Lee seemed without breath once more as he tried to formulate petty stuttering words. "Sakura…I swear to you…you are wrong! I would….I would NEVER…"

"Please Lee…just shut up…I'm so sick and tired of just _looking_ at you. Now I'm wondering why I even _saved_ you…" Without realizing it, I had finally confessed something unspeakably vile to him.

"Sakura-" he seemed to entreat before being violently interrupted.

"SHUT UP!" I shrieked, cupping both my hands against my ears and tightly closing my eyes. "Just please…shut _up_…"

I detested myself for being such a damn blinded fool to not have seen his deceitfulness. Lee's lips were satiated with insipid lies and empty words that did nothing to appease my restless mood. He had grown into a confused being who was all but inure to harsh treatment and an austere life. He was nothing. Our _fights_ were nothing. Nothing but trivial rejoinders and mordant remarks made to make us despise each other even more. It had been evident long ago, but it was time I accepted it..-_embraced_ it. The ebullient and gentle boy from our childhood was gone and would never return. There was _nothing_ that could bring him back to us-nothing at all. Not my comfort, not my screaming, _nothing_.

"Lee I…I hate you." I said through clenched teeth. "I hate you…I _hate_ you…I _HATE_ you!"

As the spiteful words left my breath, it felt as though a dam containing tension and unsaid confessions had finally broken down between us. A mixture of relief and disgust was all that was left. Lee had given me nothing, not even grief, not even a lingering regret. His lips were moving, but whatever words he said went by unheeded by me as I continue to cup my ears. Picking up the fallen medication and throwing it at his bed in a fit of rage, I bolted out the room. I _hated_ him. In that instant, my hatred towards him was stronger than anything else I abhorred. More than early mornings, more than watching someone dear cry, more than fighting with Sasuke, more than being _alone_.

I was no longer able to even stomach the mere sight of him.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

My ragged sobs echoed through the walls of the hospital's empty bathroom stalls. I wanted to stop my pathetic crying, but despite how many rolls of toilet paper I used, my tears would never dry. They rolled copiously down my cheeks and met the icy running water of the sink in front of me. The water had drenched most of my clothing and arms since I had washed my face several times to calm myself. It hadn't worked, _nothing_ worked. The tears would continue to escape in spite of whatever I did.

'_I'm such an idiot…__**he's**__ such an idiot….if I ever see him again I'll…I'll…' _

My threat was lost as I stared at my counterpart in the mirror, watching her every move down to her glassy bloodshot eyes and sporadic sniffs. Without being aware of this, I was overcome by a still moment of utter contempt for myself. My face was nothing, _I _was nothing. My brief second of introspection had given me ample reason to detest everything about myself. I was no better than Lee-I was bitter, distant….and cruel.

I was just like him.

"Control yourself Sakura…_control_…" I pleaded with myself in vain as I left the bathroom.

As my hideous luck would have it, some nurses were already beginning their morning shifts by the time my bawling had decreased.

I had lost a whole night's sleep over a stupid fight.

'_Just as well…it's not like I can go home and sleep even if I __**wanted**__ to…'_ I scoffed remembering my restless nights.

Now that I had taken the time to ruminate about it, I realized I was making do with (at most) three hours of sleep per day. Maltreating my body to the point of insomnia for some idiot suddenly seemed almost childish to me…seemed _illogical_. The mutable side of me decided that no guy was worth loosing sleep over…especially _him_. I suppressed a heavy yawn, rubbed my bloodshot eyes, and straightened my disheveled appearance out as best I could before heading out into the now inhabited lobby.

Patients who had already woken up walked weakly down the halls while being helped by their nurses. Medic nins dashed across the halls in great haste to get to one thing or another. Tsunade's whining about certain trivialities could be heard from her office. It was all monotonous. To them it just another day…to me…

It was hell.

"Oh, Sakura-san! You're here early! Would you like a list of all your patients today?" the blithe nurse at the front desk asked me.

I only nodded, absently listening to her friendly chattering.

"That man…you know the one who…he's…so just make sure…and see him…" the elderly woman's words drifted on with no meaning to me.

"Yeah…uh-huh…"

"And that little girl…you know, she just needs one more check and she's-"

"Wait, what girl?" I asked as her conversation finally sparked some interest in me.

I did not allow her time to answer as I flipped through the lists and found Tenten's name in bold letters. Underneath it, in Tsunade's furiously scribbled handwriting, read: WAS NOT ATTENDED TO YESTERDAY. SEE ME!!!

'_Crap…I didn't give her a check up last night…'_ I inwardly cursed myself and left the poor nurse nearly talking alone as I hurried to my teacher's office.

I was starting to believe I was quite ill-mannered to people.

'_Oh well…like I give a damn at this point.' _

(If Lee's actions hadn't completely turned me into a misanthrope, then my instructor's carping surely would.)

I saw my own demise when I walked into the office and the Hokage's eyes bore down on me with lethal accuracy. Shizune glanced at me with a look of discreet sympathy (probably praying for me no doubt.) Grimacing from the reaction of both women, I cautiously sat down on the seat in front of her desk and played with an invisible piece of lint hanging from my red shirt. My stomach felt like a blender with each second it took for Tsunade-sama to speak. I bit my lower lip and patiently waited for the inevitable lecture. The awkward silences I shared with her were comparable with those of Lee.

"Sakura…"

Finally hearing her voice was both relieving _and_ nerve-racking.

"Y-yes?" I tried my best to sound calm.

"It came to my attention that you did not visit, not one, but _two_ of your patients in the past couple of days…why is this?"

I gulped, but said nothing. (I wasn't foolish enough to try any excuses.)

Tsunade continued to glare at me with her unforgiving eyes as though expecting an answer. I squeezed my eyes shut and hoped she would not scream when she disowned me as her student.

"Never let your personal life get involved in work…now go…" She said curtly as she shooed me with her hand.

I blinked several times and opened my mouth, apparently _shocked_ by her sudden munificent mood. Another awkward pause filled the room as I pondered if the conversation was done or not. Taking her hand gesture as a dismissal, I silently pushed the chair back in its place and backed away from the room as slowly as I could. She returned to her paperwork and resumed whatever tedious task she was doing. A shiver ran through my body. It was rare watching her take such lenient action whenever it came to reprimanding me. The day Tsunade became kind to her apprentices would probably be the day that hell froze.

'_Hell…it'll be the day __**Kakashi**__ is the one who challenges Gai to a contest.' _

As I closed the door behind me with the utmost care, I couldn't help but wonder what had brought this frightening change in that woman.

In any case, only one thought _really_ crossed my mind.

'_Well __**that**__ was easy.' _

The majority of my day was miserably spent wallowing in self-pity and mindlessly walking around the hospital, hesitating on what to do next. It wasn't as though my lethargy wouldn't allow me to do something productive, (but chugging down heavily caffeinated drinks and binging on "nutritious" foods that were purchased from a vending machine sounded like a pleasant way to cope with everything that had happened.) My head and body ached with a fatigue that could no longer be repressed with sugar, but my sleep was always transient. There was nothing that could bring rest to this fretful mind of mine.

'_I should really just get out of here…' _

I nodded inwardly as I took my own advice. If nothing else, some fresh air would probably alleviate my anxiety. My desultory mind had long been rushing through everything that had happened. Time away from it all was something I _desperately_ needed. Ignoring the pangs of guilt and fear that I got from the possibility of being discovered by Tsunade, I strolled down the end of the hall, but stopped in front of the hospital's backdoors. Beyond the glass doors lay a courtyard scattered with moribund flowers and trees. In spring, it was often the ideal place of relaxation for patients who were recuperating.

'_And some who just want to train.'_ I added as I recalled Lee abusing his wounded body with push ups after the chunin exams.

A tinge of pity rose within my chest, but I forced it back down like a bitter pill. Had it really been that long ago that I had rested my eyes on him as he collapsed from his own pain? Had it _really_ been that long ago that I have given him that flower? Now that I had all the time to think about it, I scoffed at the concept of that stupid flower. Ino must have thought me ridiculous when I professed about the unmitigated bravery of the daffodil as it faced the harsh winter and bloomed in the spring. I shoved the doors out of my way as I lamented the idiocy of my adolescence.

'_What a load of bull.'_

I tried washing down the disgust of my old self by guzzling the rest of my drink. My hands shook as I discarded it in a nearby trash can and whipped out another from my shuriken pouch. (That thing had multiple uses aside from storing deadly weapons.) The vast amount of sugar and caffeine in my system did nothing but exacerbate my already pounding headache. My discomfort increased as my fingers fidgeted over the lid of the beverage.

"You really ought to cut back on those if they are making you shake so much." A voice pointed out in front of me as I continued the ordeal to open the can.

Startled by the verbal intrusion, I managed to get a hold of the lid and popped it open. The crisp snap of the lid was heard…then the sound of the frosty liquid angrily frothing in front of me.

"Ah damn!" I yelled as I held the exploding can at arm's length.

A feminine laughter shortly followed the galled hiss of the soda.

I rubbed my sticky hands against my clothes and looked up to see Tenten sitting on a nearby bench next to a tree.

"Te-….T-tenten!" I could barely hold back my shock at seeing my friend out of bed. "Wha-….what are you _doing_ here?!"

"I think that's _my_ question don't you think?" she teased as she motioned for me to come sit.

I reluctantly agreed and walked toward her with a leisurely pace. Discomfort filled my face with each step I took. Tenten wasn't exactly someone I wanted to see at the moment. I loved her, but there was no possible way to look her in the eyes without remembering the pain….without remembering Lee.

"How are you feeling Tenten?" I asked as I sat on the bench with the same eagerness I would have had for sitting on a bed of needles.

"Way better thank you!" she responded with a weary smile. "I was tired of being cooped up in the room, so the nurses allowed me to go outside since my injuries were no longer serious."

"Th-….that's great." Was all I could muster.

"Yeah…so….how…have you been? I haven't seen you for a couple of days."

The trivial remark nearly made me cringe as I fidgeted on the bench like someone being interrogated. I played with a desiccated flower, threw small pebbles at trees, looked at nothing in particular up in the sky, _ANYTHING_ as long as it didn't include looking at Tenten's eyes.

"I-I…I've been okay I-I guess…" I responded slowly as I took a sip of my drink.

"You sure about that?" she asked with a wry face.

"Wh-why _wouldn't_ I be?" I was soon defensive lest she read me.

The precious beverage slipped away from my fingers as Tenten grabbed it and scrutinized it. "Well for one thing, you keep shaking and I'm sure it's not because you're excited about going back to work."

"_S-so_? I need to keep up with my job or else I'll fall asleep."

"Yeah, but not this early in the afternoon…your face is wet for some reason, your _sleeves_ are wet too, not to mention you won't look at me in-"

"Would you just mind your own business!?" I snapped as I tried to jerk the drink back in my possession.

Something had unintentionally cracked within me.

I feared she was bound to notice what had truly taken place if she continued on with her sharp perception of my appearance. My intentions hadn't been to sound so mean, but I didn't want her worrying about anything at this point. I didn't want her to discover the dark streaks under my glassy eyes, my wrinkled clothes and exhausted voice. I didn't want her to know what I had said to Lee.

She appeared to be hurt, but returned my drink.

"Sorry…I'm just worried about you. I-I…I didn't mean to be so nosy." She apologized softly.

Guilt swept over me, not because I had shouted at a friend, but because I was being too much of a coward to tell her anything.

"It-it's all right…I'm sorry too…I didn't mean to…" I mumbled as I stared at the can's condensation dripping through my hands.

An awkward silence loomed over us as we struggled to find our voices. I could feel that her choice of topic included the three men inside the hospital, but I wished no part of it. The whole night and morning I had thought to myself on the matter and could find no solution as to how I could be rid of them. Tsunade-sama would disown me if I just deserted _any_ of my patients, Team Gai was no exception. Despite my suppressed urges to leave the bench, neither one of us was ready to even _move_. It was finally with great difficulty that Tenten managed to even clear her _throat_.

"Sakura…are you still not talking to Lee?" She asked the question as blatantly as someone asking me for the time of day.

I tried to ignore the question by idly tapping my can.

Realizing she wasn't going to rouse answers out of me, Tenten leaned back on the wooden bench and released a heavy sigh.

"Neji came by to see me you know."

"Oh?" I responded with diminutive interest.

"Yeah…I gotta hand it to you medic nin, he recovered _way_ faster than I expected him to." She pointed out with an odd look of perplexity.

"What do you mean?" my question finally held a trace of curiosity.

Tenten closed her eyes and rested the palm of her hand against her healing forehead. She groaned in annoyance from the lingering discomfort she felt from the slight contact.

"I didn't think Neji would still be _alive_ after he and I dragged everyone back to the village."

"Ah." I said dryly.

My friend quickly opened her eyes and shot me a deadly look.

"'Ah'? '_Ah'_? Is that all you can say even after I'm telling you all this? A few days ago I heard you were beating Shikamaru up for news on us! What's _wrong_ with you!? Doesn't it _matter_ to you!?" she exclaimed furiously as she scooted farther away from me on the bench.

I managed to look at her in the eyes and return a stolid gaze. "_Should_ it matter to me? I thought it did…but…after what I've seen from your team, I don't know anymore."

"What? What are you _talking_ about?" she asked, apparently taken back by my sudden apathetic view of the matter.

"Neji…Tsunade…my teammates…and now _you_…it seems everyone wants me to see Lee," I began to feel scorn bubbling up inside me at the sound of his name on my lips, "but tell me something…why would I want to see someone who hates me-who _I_ hate? Why would I want to see someone…who tried to _kill_ me?"

Tenten's eyes grew wide in disbelief when she heard this. "Sakura…that-he wasn't himse-"

"Why would I even want to _look_ at someone as insignificant as that coward? You know what? I told him I hated him, I told him that I wished I hadn't rescued him!" I instinctively continued with my tirade despite my conscience screaming not to. "You know what else?! I'M _GLAD_ I DID! I'M GLAD I TOLD THAT BASTARD I HATED HIM! I WISH HE WERE _DEAD_!"

Another dam inside me burst open with Tenten, releasing a new endless cascade of vile confessions. My lips shook as I fought back fresh scalding tears and screams. My head and chest grew numb; a gnawing knot in my throat would not disappear no matter how hard I swallowed. The speck of conscience I had left begged me to stop, but my rage beat it into submission. I tried to speak, but only a short whimper escaped when my raw throat tried to form words. Fury had long left me bereft of kindness and propriety.

The girl in front of me opened her mouth, but quickly closed it. The shock was evident in her pale face over what I had said. Her eyes were filled to the brim with tears threatening to spill as mine were. Anguish and disbelief were evident in her trembling hands as she raised them to cover her equally shocked lips.

A once heavily resisted sob dared to leave _both_ our mouths.

In that second…in the midst of a moment filled with overwhelming emotion, we both suddenly exploded into a fit of uncontrollable sobs.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry…I'm sorry! I DID'T MEAN IT! I DIDN'T MEAN IT! I SWEAR! I'M SORRY!" I bawled as I covered my sobs with my unoccupied hand and lowered my head to my knees. The other still held on to the can with a death grip.

"WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT SAKURA!? _WHY_!?" Tenten cried in return.

The spontaneous mourning continued for long period of time, one that was only prolonged whenever one of us tried to speak.

"I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry…" I kept whispering between my moans of regret.

Tenten said nothing as she continued to cover her mouth. Her sniffles were calmer than my own, but her tears dripped down her face longer than mine did.

"I'm such an ass…I'm such an ass…" I muttered as I began to hiccup.

"Yeah…you…are…" Tenten concurred, her pauses filled with desperate gasps for air instead of silence.

Nurses gleefully pushing patients out in wheelchairs awkwardly retraced their steps backwards toward the door as they saw the odd scene in front of them. They were intruding on a private moment between two hormone driven young women and they somehow knew it. I didn't care if they saw me-_hell_ they could inform Tsuande-sama for all I cared. They could talk behind my back about all my scandals with Team Gai, I didn't care anymore. All I wanted to do at that moment was cry with the friend I had harmed.

"T-tenten…I-I…I…I…" I tripped over each and every attempt to form intelligent speech.

It looked as though my friend was faring no better than I was. Sobs racked her body each time she tried to take her hands off her mouth.

The weeping silence persisted for a time that felt like an eternity to us. Our bodies would not yet allow us the privilege of speaking without lengthening my shame.

Tenten was the first to say something coherent and not riddled with hiccups and gasps.

"Sakura…wh-why? D-did…wh-why? Did he really? D-did he r-really try to h-hurt you?" she pleaded with her bloodshot eyes for my words not to be true.

I lamentably nodded as my head continued to hang in humiliation.

"I-It was…during th-the mission…I'm sorry…I-I shouldn't have said anything…I-I'm sorry I'm sorry…" I repeated pitifully.

"I…I c-can't believe it…I-I just c-can't!" she uttered, "I-I didn't…w-want to b-believe Neji…either."

"Neji? Oh g-god T-tenten d-don't tell me that Lee-that he…" my head shot up from the bewilderment.

My emotionally collected friend nodded her head in response.

"Where do you think…" she began with a calmer tone as she rubbed her eyes with her palm, "where do you think Neji got those kunai cuts from? It wasn't from the enemy Sakura…he's not that careless."

"Then where…"

I held back a gasp at the mere possibility of Lee hurting his own teammate…his rival…his _friend_.

The tree's bare branches swayed playfully above us, its brown leaves landing softly on top of our heads. A chilling breeze engulfed us and created small tornadoes of arid flowers and olive colored grass. Persistent tears still staining my face were soon blown away by the wind and quickly dried. The wooden bench supporting our weight creaked noisily as Tenten edged closer to me. As if to answer my question of her proximity, she leaned against my back and took hold of one of my hands. A forlorn smile crept up her lips as she squeezed it. I assumed it was my turn to speak.

"Do you…did Neji tell you when he got pierced by the kunai?" I asked uneasily.

Tenten nodded her head as she recalled. "We all knew something was wrong with him…he had been acting strange ever since Neji had rescued him from the cellar…like he was a different person or something."

"Where were _you_?"

"Knocked out…apparently."

"Ah."

"Yeah well…one of men somehow managed to hit me the moment I let my guard down." She explained with embarrassment. "The mission was supposed to be easy…it was _supposed_ be a simple scroll retrieval mission…I don't know what went wrong, I just don't know."

"But what happened that made it go wrong?" I asked, my interest skyrocketing.

"One of the ninja that ambushed us…I guess Lee recognized him…and went after him…"

"Was it his father?!" I immediately concluded.

"His father? I…I was never…I never knew he had one-"

"You _don't_!? Don't you remember Neji and Gai Sensei telling you what happened after the day Lee didn't come to prac-…-tice?" my question was left half finished as I looked at Tenten's hurt expression. .

Regret soon flourished within my chest for ever opening my mouth. Gai Sensei and Neji had never even _spoken_ to her of what had happened to Lee. She had been left out like someone of miniscule importance-like she didn't even _matter_. I uneasily rubbed the back of my head as I pondered a way to make her miserable face disappear. Being left out from _anything_ that related to one's team was horrible to bear. I knew first hand how worthless I felt whenever _my_ team didn't inform me of something _they_ all knew.

"I…I was never informed me of that…they never…" she said plaintively.

"I-I I'm pretty sure it's only because they didn't want you to worry!" I quickly tried to allay her reluctance with an excuse I had heard from my team countless times.

"It…it doesn't matter…it's a trivial thing right now." She dismissed my reasoning and looked at the dead grass under us. "I guess I'll have to bring it up later on…"

I could only nod while I faked sudden interest in the dead shrubbery as well. My life was screwed if Neji ever found out who had told Tenten of Lee's problem. I had just foolishly assumed she knew since she always seemed to be so well informed of _both_ her teammates. It wasn't _my_ fault they didn't think her _important_ enough to tell her of something as serious as this. What _was_ it about men and their stupid secrets? Now I could only hope they wouldn't have to face her wrath.

"Did you know he was drugged?"

"Who? Neji?"

"No you idiot, _Lee_!"

"Oh….," After quite a few moments of processing this vital information, my body finally allowed me a reaction, "What the…? Why wasn't the hospital-why wasn't _I_ informed of this?!" I asked in disbelief.

"By the time he got to the hospital the poison or drug was probably already out of his system." She supposed. "The way he was when he came in though…I'm sure what all the medics wanted to do at that moment was just treat his wounds since they still needed to tend to the rest of us."

"Or maybe it wasn't even _detected_ in his bloodstream…" I added pensively.

"Well…whatever the case…he was under the influence of something. Didn't he seem _strange_ to you?"

I tried to recall Lee's vehement words and unusual personality when I discovered him in the bloody bathroom. His actions were harsh and startling that night, but a reluctant side of me wanted to believe it had nothing to do with the drug.

"Neji said they poisoned Lee when they took him away to a different room, but the monsters gave him the antidote in small doses…"

"Oh…" my voice shuddered at the enemy's macabre methods of torture. "Did they…did they beat him?" I asked fearfully when I remembered the horrible gash on his stomach.

Tenten gave me a confused expression as the words left my mouth. It made my heart drop to my stomach.

"He…he wasn't touched at all by the enemy…that's what scares me. His body was completely unharmed but…whatever those ninja did…it was enough to mess with his mind…"

My eyes dared not blink as Tenten revealed this to me. There was no way Lee could have escaped the enemy unscathed, especially one who seemed to be in charge of torture and interrogation.

"Then where did he-?"

"Neji."

Another blow landed on my pounding chest when I heard the boy's name.

Tenten continued, unfazed by my shocked reactions. "Gai Sensei was passed out in a cellar…Lee was so drugged he could barely walk…"

"So then…?" I urged her to go on with the explanation I had waited so long to hear.

"We fled. We took them and tried to put as much distance between us and the enemy…"

"But then HOW DID LEE GET HURT!?" I yelled in exasperation.

Tenten shot me a surprised look from my sudden concern, but was hesitant to continue.

"W-well…" she stammered, "Lee regained consciousness by the time we reached the village's gates…h-he just…I don't know, he became…_violent_."

"Violent?"

She was making more sense as I remembered how Lee acted towards me.

"Y-yeah…he started yelling and rambling about how he wanted to go back-how we should've left him…how we took away his only chance to see him…_him_." Tenten's eyes grew wide in realization as the identity of the man Lee was talking about finally dawned on her.

"His _father_." I whispered.

We both looked at each other with identical expressions. Our mouths were open, our eyes broad and wavering from the secret.

"A-and then what happened?" I asked like a child eagerly waiting to be read the next part of a story.

"He…," Tenten slowly paused, her lachrymose state not allowing her to finish, "Neji kept trying to calm him down and…Lee punched him…"

I nodded, absorbing the information as quickly as she said it. "They started to fight…and things just got a little out of control."

Tenten released something between a sob and a bitter chuckle. "A _little_? The idiots were soon rolling around on the ground as though they were enemies! Of course…Lee's reflexes were slow from the drug and Neji…well he was beyond exhaustion. It looked like Neji had finally calmed him down but…that's where he let his guard down…"

"Guard down?"

"Lee stabbed him."

I grew deathly quiet as I tried to figure out what to make of this. Lee's actions, no matter how insane, seemed to fit anyone's state while being drugged. (The poor bastard was probably hallucinating for all I knew.) I hadn't even taken into account the possibility of him being under the influence of _more_ than one drug. That alone was enough to deeply alter his actions, feelings, judgment, and most importantly…his memory. There was no way to describe how foolish I felt at that moment. All my sadistic words, my contempt, my empty insults…were nothing. I had just started a fight with a beat up depressed druggie.

I was an ass.

"But Neji got stabbed _two_ times…what happened then? And where were _you_!?" I asked, shrugging off my sudden epiphany.

"Well…as soon as Neji winced, he imbedded his kunai into Lee's stomach without fully realizing it..or maybe he did…but whatever was going through his mind, it doesn't matter anymore. When Lee noticed he was bleeding-well he…he stabbed him in the leg. I was there but…when I told him not to leave, I just felt a pain on my stomach and passed out…"

"Ah…" I responded, being all but _used_ to what probably made Tenten lose consciousness. (The idiot had probably punched her when she got close enough to him.)

"I can only assume Lee dragged all three of us to the hospital and tried to leave after that." She finished, trembling from the iniquity of his teammate.

"No…I was sent to retrieve him…he went back to his apartment to treat his wounds." I said as I recollected the insuperable memory. "That's when I brought him back."

As the accounts of what truly happened finally unfurled before my mind, I found myself unable to comprehend the sheer misinterpretation of it. I still didn't exactly _adore_ Lee to say the least…rather, I despised him even _more_ for hurting his friends. But the fact was, he would have to be exempted from taking any responsibility because of the drug. My scurrilous attack at Lee had been completely unnecessary and irrevocable. I doubted he would even want to _see_ me after all I had done. (Just as well, it wasn't as though I _deserved_ it.)

Still…I couldn't ignore the unremitting harsh pulls coming from my chest each time I remembered how I screamed at him.

"Bet you feel like crap right now huh?" Tenten seemed to read my mind.

"Oh, quiet Tenten…"

"I know that…" she began slowly and carefully chose her words, "Lee is different. I know that we may never be able to change him back…and I also know that he's hurt us…but we can still help him."

"You think so?" I asked with a shred of hope.

"I know so. Why _else_ would he of acted so strangely during the trip?"

I raised an eyebrow at her and set my icy can between us. "What do you mean?"

"They were small changes…but they were still there. The way he smiled at rivers when he thought no one was looking, the way he _unintentionally_ bought the same food you had in your house…the susceptibility in his eyes when he bandaged his arms…the way the tips of his fingers traced over his lips whenever he was deep in thought."

A blush crept up my face, my pale skin intensifying the florid color.

She smiled at me and took a sip of the drink as she grabbed it. "The hot-blooded dork is still somewhere inside Sakura…he's not dead-he simply…_forgot_ who he is. We just need to help him."

I returned the smile and rose from the bench with an optimism I did not know I possessed. Making sure to empty my shuriken pouch before Tenten so she could have the rest of my junk food, I headed towards the door. I didn't need it anymore. No matter how much I ate, the hollow space in my body would always remain. There was something I desperately needed to do in order to finally fill it.

"Where are you-?"

"I'm going to see Lee, I'll let you in on the verdict Tenten."


	22. Relived Aggressions

Hello 'alo! Again, thank you a million for all the wonderful and encouraging reviews! I never would have thought this story would be blessed with such kind readers! I apologize for the late update once again, but college leaves me with little time to do much of anything lately. I will try to write faster, but it's frustrating when something is always due. I've been trying to make the chapters longer though! Speaking of school…a good friend of mine mentioned something that I failed to see. It was something so important and yet I just hadn't noticed it. The story has practically followed me since senior year (considering I started to write it a week or so before school started.) And everything that happened, the piles of homework, the flag practices, feelings of anger, regret, lovelorn problems, spite...football games and trips...I took everything that happened and used it as inspiration to continue writing the story. As it joins me into college, I hope to keep on entertaining you with each new chapter of the story. Thank you so much for everything you have all done for me! Anyway, as always, since the first chapter and until the last, Read, Enjoy, and Recommend!

**Relived Aggressions**

As I walked toward my destination with renewed fortitude, I knew I had finally become different. I no longer felt the tight wad inside my throat, the trembling of my limbs, nor the churning of my stomach. If anything, my bodily movements were deathly focused on searching for Lee's room. They were as impatient and erratic as the deafening beats deep inside my chest. It was not to say that my heart was suffering from the effects of caffeine or extreme fatigue, rather, it was merely partaking in jovial skips. For the first time in months, a genuine smile spread across my face. The movement of my mouth was alien and rather startling as I felt it stretch further along my lips. I was certain it could've matched Naruto's goofy smile. Nurses idly walking by probably thought me a fool as I walked…

But I couldn't have cared less.

This was my epiphany, my realization…my _enlightenment_! If it required me to grin like an idiot from the sheer joy of it then I was not one to complain. My head became light as I continued to walk, but I could only guess it was because of the elation

I felt…ecstatic.

I hummed a simple random tune as I reached Lee's door and tried to twist the door handle.

It was locked.

The terror that was about to be rushed through my blood was quickly allayed when I heard male voices inside the room. With a liking toward my inquisitive nature, I instinctively pressed my head against the door in an attempt to listen.

"How can you not want to see him? _Us_?"

"I do not."

"Why?" came the terse question.

"Because…you are all fools…"

"Need I remind you that _you_ were the one who blew our cover?"

"Quiet…I never _asked_ for your help!"

"You don't have to you hot-blooded fool…we're a team. Or at least…I thought we were."

An uneasy silence loomed inside the room, a thick tension growing between them begging to be prolonged. I found myself mentally picturing the two men as they stared each other down with the epitome of revulsion. _Both_ biting their tongues yet dar_ing_ each other to speak. Lee would surely lash out at the other poor individual with derogatory insults that would make my heart thrash faster than it already was.

"Maybe so…but you did not have to resort to such measures back there."

"Would _you_ have done any different?"

Another complete pause hung around the room as I heard the unexpectedly placid remarks. I leaned my entire weight on the cool wooden door, eager to hear some more since it became obvious that it was Neji speaking. (I doubted _any_ voice aside from his could sound so collected and hostile at the same time.) Hearing a whispered conversation through a locked door wasn't exactly respectful (nor smart) but my need to be intrusive was excessively growing with each passing second.

"It appears we are no longer alone."

My blood froze to a halt and I clamped my mouth shut so as to not give away my position with the mere _sound_ of my erratic breath.

"You can open the door now _Sakura_." Neji even addressed me.

'_Damn byakugan.' _I thought as I momentarily forgot about the boy's gift.

I sheepishly opened the door and gave them (what I thought) was a dazzling smile. My reward was Lee looking at me askance and an omnipotent glare from Neji.

"What do you want?" the pale eyed boy asked me with a nearly lethal tone.

"I wanted to see Lee…" I answered, "not that it's any of _your_ business." I decided to add.

Neji quirked an eyebrow at my insolence, ready to spew poison in my direction, but was quickly interrupted by his teammate.

"I wanted to see you too." Lee concurred evenly.

I finally released a sigh of relief I did not know I was holding and gazed at him. At least he was willing to talk and listen now. Lee's eyes transiently met my own and quickly reverted to the floor in discomfort. Mine could never leave him and scrutinized his every movement. My head grew light as I continued to breathe rapidly, my heart wanted to rip out of its own ribcage, and my casual façade slowly crumbled away in the boy's presence. I swore my legs would collapse any moment. Penitence was evident in our slightly quivering hands as we struggled to look at each other. It would be an ordeal just to open my mouth again.

"Before you two idiots start talking," Neji coolly interrupted, "Lee, you have to come with me-"

"I will do no such thing!" Lee spat vehemently before I could hear what his teammate had to say.

My curiosity was sparked anew.

"See who Neji?" I asked with a tinge of alarm.

The man standing before us gave me an agitated look as he was interrupted once more.

"Gai Sensei finally regained consciousness." he muttered as though I weren't there.

A wave of shock blasted through my restive mind when I heard the relieving news. My mouth grew arid, only adding to my deficiency of words.

"G-Gai Sensei…HE-HE _WOKE UP_!?" I screamed in disbelief. "WHEN!?"

Neji continued to glare at me with that seemingly innate loath he had for me. "And here I was thinking _you_ were the one in charge of him." he replied with not even the slightest interest in my question. "He's being attended by a medic nin right now…so no thanks to you, he should be fine…"

"Well that's so good to hear!" I exclaimed in excitement and completely brushed off his insults.

(I would have to break Neji's nose some other time.)

An elated smile stretched across the far edges of my face from hearing his unbelievably wonderful news. All the patients I had been assigned had survived (if that didn't give me bragging rights from Tsunade then I no longer knew _what_ did.) I could imagine Tenten's face light up as soon as I gave word of this. Before I knew it, they would probably be training and doing missions like the rest of our squads. Everything would turn back to its blissful monotonous and _normal_ way, back to Gai yelling about "youth" and dragging his team to do unnecessary tasks, back to…back to…

I could no longer finish my hopes as Neji ripped me out of my thoughts.

"He has asked to see Lee…" he remarked, implying for my assistance with his persistent comrade.

My eyes slowly went back to the man beside me as he continued to glower at Neji. It seemed visiting his Sensei was out of the question by the look of him.

"Lee…he's your Sensei. You do…you _do_ want to see him right?" I asked with a speck of hope in my voice.

His defiant stare was reverted to me as I addressed the matter. If anything, I had imagined _Lee_ to be the one dragging Neji out of his room to visit their Sensei, to be dancing and screaming from sheer joy at their instructor's health. He had been like a _father_ figure to him (not like the bastard who raised him.) I had been sure the chance of seeing him would almost jerk Lee out of his depressed mood (or at the very least bring a damn smile to his face.) His resistance to our persuasive supplication baffled and infuriated me to no end. How someone could be so callous even while knowing someone precious to him had almost died was a mystery.

"L-lee?...Why won't you go?" I asked cautiously when I realized I was speaking benignly at him for the first time in months. It seemed almost bizarre since the both of us had not shared anything between us except stinging remarks and brash insults.

"I will not…I have no business with him." He curtly responded.

My restive eyes blinked repeatedly in bewilderment when I wanted them close, my mouth arid as I tried to speak, and my words gone as I tried to form them. I paid it no mind and stared back at Neji.

The Hyuga merely growled, took hold of the back of Lee's hospital gown (nearly ripping it in the process) and attempted the ordeal of _dragging_ him out the door.

"You damned fool…" he muttered as he forcibly jerked the stubborn man out the room.

"No Neji! Let me be! I wish to talk to Sakura!" Lee exclaimed as he released himself from his teammate's brutal hold on him.

"I won't talk to you unless you see your Sensei first." I bargained, thinking myself a _genius_ for my improvised idea.

Lee's struggling movements quickly died out as he glared at me. I swore he would attempt to kill me with the irate expression he had.

"If I leave to see Gai, then do not think I will come back to talk with you." He practically threatened before being grabbed by a fuming Neji once more.

I looked at him and gave him a stern face, one that meant a complete apathy toward anything he had to say. One of my index fingers involuntarily lifted and maliciously pointed at Lee.

"I don't expect you to."

"Then once again you are a disappointment to me." He practically seethed.

"I'm not trying to-!" I suddenly stopped, not being able to find oxygen for the rest of my insult. My aching head grew lighter as I stared at the menacing finger that had once been pointing at Lee's chest. It was as though my very heart had stopped beating-if only for a moment, and the air itself became dense and unattainable. Again, I tried to speak, but only heard an incoherent whine escape. My own weight became unbearable to sustain as my fragile legs trembled. My vision, already blurred by some unknown force, slowly deteriorated and gave way to nothing. Attempts to regain control of my body had failed. All I managed to distinguish was Lee's distorted figure as he reached his hand out to me.

I only sensed my eyes roll back to a pit of darkness…

…and then there was nothing.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I awoke to several sets of familiar voices whispering silently amongst one another. The softer voices showed signs of concern while the latter seemed to be irritated. I couldn't help but wonder if I died and barged into the conversation of my final judgment. An inaudible groggy moan escaped through my throat as I tried to question these odd voices. My eyes had long grown accustomed to a comforting darkness inside my lids I had not seen in months. They refused to open once they saw a slit of light. Something soft caressed my forehead, but I furrowed my eyebrows in resistance from the unwanted contact. Again, the voices egged me out of my sub consciousness. I wanted to refuse, to shout at them to let me be…but my curiosity was too great. I wanted to see the owners of these distant voices.

"Sakura? Sakura! You're awake! Oh thank goodness she's finally awake!"

(I didn't _need_ to open my eyes to know that was my mother.)

Again I groaned and pried my eyes open to face the harsh unrelenting light on a white ceiling. My head felt like it had split in half when I tried to rise.

"Whoa now," a recognizable authoritative voice advised me as I was gently pushed back down, "I wouldn't try to rise just yet…my god you are _quite_ the troubling apprentice."

I groaned in anguish from the violent pounding in my head as I landed back on what appeared to be my bed. The perdurable pain was insufferable; I didn't wish it on anyone, not even _Neji_. It felt as though someone was shoving a kunai inside my ear. My whole body twisted against the bed sheets from the sheer agony.

"Sakura!" a voice boomed in worry when I covered my throbbing forehead with one hand.

"What she needs right now is rest." Tsunade scolding tone seemed to echo in my mind.

"But will she be all right?" my mother's fretful voice asked.

Despite my pain, I couldn't help but smile against my pillow from my mother's concern for my health. She could be annoying as hell, gone half the time, and have a thunderous voice that matched Naruto's, but still…she cared for me.

"She _should_ be… from the look of her, she's just suffering from prolonged fatigue."

I was now mentally cursing the dearth of hours of sleep and endless caffeinated drinks I had consumed. If the macabre exhaustion wasn't killing me now then my master would surely finish the job. Her inevitable harangue on how a "proper medic nin should take care of her body" was already ringing in my ears. The way her eyes squinted to scrutinize every sliver of fault within my choices plagued my mind. If my splitting headache wasn't horrible enough, now I would have to eventually deal with my sensei's scolding. My body cringed and scrunched up from the mere _thought_ of what she would do once this was done. Having her as an instructor was a joy indeed.

"What…what happened to me?" I asked, my voice deeply muffled by a thick comforting pillow.

My teacher's light chuckle resonated through my sensitive ears like a horn, my head in torment because of it.

"What do you _think_ happened to you Sakura? I told you to lay off those soft drinks if you weren't sleeping well." The woman practically mocked. "You've been out for a couple of days."

All I could do was groan in response from the stinging aches penetrating through my skull like knives.

"Oh my, Sakura…you really ought to take better care of yourself. You had me worried _sick_! Are you hungry? Do you want some soup?"

My mother's unbounded questions smacked my sensitive head like a rain of rocks.

"Yeah…sure…uh-huh." I growled as my knees retreated to my chin in an attempt to cast away her words.

My lax attention to my body had been the cause of this, I couldn't exactly say I didn't deserve a severe reprimanding.

"Well…thank you for calling me over…"

"Oh no no no! Thank _you_ Lady Hokage! I'm sorry for taking time out of your schedule!"

"It's no trouble at all…just give me a minute with her."

'_Oh god here it comes…the __**nagging**__…'_

I couldn't help but gulp down a lump of terror as I heard my mother's footsteps grow faint as she retreated from the room. My only source of protection was gone.

"You really are hopeless…"

"My apologies." I responded dryly as I turned my body over to show her my back. I was NOT in the mood to be chewed out by my teacher.

"But really, what did you _expect_ from not getting an adequate amount of rest?"

"It seems my mind has been elsewhere…" I muttered, wanting desperately to be left alone.

"Well, give your mind a break…I really don't think your friends going anywhere any time soon." She nonchalantly added as though she were telling me how sunny the day was.

My mind jumped back into commission when I recalled my previous memories of the bickering teammates. The top part of my body mechanically jolted off the bed as fright flooded within me. "What happened to Lee? Where's Neji?" I quickly demanded to know.

Tsunade-sama chuckled at my impetuous actions and pulled up a chair from my study desk to sit.

"_That_ got you up didn't it?" she smirked as she crossed her arms over her chest and comfortably leaned back on the chair.

I tried to rip my gaze away from my instructor in disgust, obviously not wanting to show how vulnerable I was whenever Lee's name was mentioned.

"They're fine…if you really wanted to know." She mentioned derisively, "They're a pretty strong team…I wouldn't be surprised if some of them were released from the hospital today."

"Hmph."

Realizing my dour mood, my teacher lifted herself from the chair and gave me a straitlaced look. She seemed to be looking right through me.

"Oh, and Sakura?"

"_What_?" I moaned in agony, not being able to stomach another question.

"I'd get out of bed soon if I were you…"

I eschewed her ambiguous recommendation and dumped myself back on the bed, stuffing my head underneath my pillow.

'_Weird old ladies and their intuitions…' _

"Sure…"

She released something that resembled an amused chuckle and took her leave.

"Just remind me that I owe you a bottle of sake once you get back to work."

"Mm."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

My sleep had been ephemeral and fruitless as I continued to lie in bed, taking _great_ interest in the oscillating fan on my ceiling. Pink locks of my hair obscured my view, but my body was too paralyzed with lethargy to even care. I didn't know how long I had been in bed, didn't know what time it was, and barely knew _where_ I was. The surreal state I was in only seemed to levitate the lightness in my head. The immense thrashing in it that I thought would never end had finally succumbed to a soft uncomfortable thudding. I hadn't even been _five_ minutes into another uneventful round of sleep when I heard my mother's voice downstairs. She seemed to be fervently talking about a rather _interesting_ subject by the sound of her.

"Tsunade said…_three_ hours of sleep! Can you _imagine_? That little girl of mine…I know _you_ would never…maybe you can tell her to…"

Pieces of the droll conversation drifted in and out of the room, ending up as incoherent ramblings when I finally listened to them.

"Maybe dad's back home…" I mumbled to no one in particular, my joy adulterated with the light pounding still resistant in my head.

"Yes, Tsunade-sama recommended a great deal of rest to help her recuperate."

I cracked open one eye like a frightened animal staring at its death. My father's voice wasn't that formal, if anything I would've heard him _halfway_ across the village if he ever called out my name. There was only one loser known in the village who used speech barren of contractions.

"Well I think…just sweet that you….cream…the bags….lie…sofa!"

I had to quirk an eyebrow as I tried to make sense of just _what_ my mother was rambling on about.

'_Please let it be my dad, please let it be my dad, please __**please**__ PLEASE!_' I pleaded to any deity that existed to make my hapless fortune disappear.

As my mother's voice became louder and clearer, I instinctively buried myself within my bed sheets. Maybe I could make them go away by pretending to be _dead_.

I inwardly lifted an enraged fist and shook it at nothing in particular.

'_Damn you Tsunade and your vague ominous warnings!_'

"Sakura! Sakura, _look_ who's here to see you!" my mother's jubilant voice rung through my room as she all but _broke_ the door open.

I tried not to curse when she practically ripped away my blankets (the only thing separating me from utter embarrassment.) How a mother could torture her own daughter like this was beyond me. Here I was, in my pajamas and my _beautiful_ morning face as I rested my eyes on someone I had loathed and yet _yearned_ to see.

"Hello Sakura."

The man I could at first not even _stomach_ to think about stood before me sporting a rather odd looking face. It was one that bore neither scorn nor malice towards me, but still made the blood circulating my body leave my face as I tried to study it. In a state of uncontrollable alarm, I inspected my clothes, praying to an unknown god once more to have something _other_ than pajamas on me. I sighed in relief when I noticed I had a simple pink shirt and loose pants, but my mortification soon fired up again when I thought about my hair. Grabbing a hair band on the dresser beside my bed, I tried to pull it back in a ponytail. It probably looked like a tangled ball of yarn. Aside from wanting to kill my mom, wanting the earth to _devour_ me from being seen like this was one of the many deaths I wished for now.

"_WELL_ then! I will now _GO_ downstairs and _LEAVE_ you two _ALONE_." My mom's horrendous implications to give us privacy were overstated to the point of indignity as she retreated from us with a smile plastered on her face. "I will _ALSO_ go to _WORK_ in a bit _SAKURA_, so be _NICE_."

But of course, she _had_ to add the final touch to belabor the obvious. She stopped behind Lee where she _thought_ he couldn't look and gave me a cheesy crooked wink and a thumbs up that seemed _eerily_ familiar to Gai Sensei's.

I just shuddered.

'_My god…__**mom**__ just __**go**__.'_ I mentally prayed and begged as I covered half my face with the palm of my hand in humiliation.

After what I _swore_ was a full minute of my mother holding that pose, the unbearable woman _finally_ understood my importunate need for her to leave and quickly obeyed with a reproached face.

'_Great… now the Hokage __**and**__ Lee know what a basket case she is._'

I dared not meet Lee's inquiring face as I pondered what to say. It seemed like an eternity had passed since my mother had left us and I was bereft of courage to form any type of speech. We could only stare at each other uneasily and wonder what was going through each other's minds. But there was nothing I could say that could break the icy barrier between us. I swore I wanted to scream until again, that silence came. That…_insufferable_ silence. That silence that threatened to engulf me in insanity if Lee didn't break it, the silence that made me want to slap him for some sort of reaction out of the idiot. If anything, I wanted my mom to _be_ here again (_anything_ was better than having to endure this torment.) Nevertheless, having my mother here would have _probably_ been wise lest Lee attempted to kill me again.

'_Well then, at least then there would be __**one**__ witness to the murder.' _

I coughed, mentally kicking myself for such a horrible joke.

"Sakura."

I sent my attention back to the boy standing in front of my bedroom door as he addressed my name.

"…Hey Lee."

Salutations and names were the only things we were willing to say in my cramped and unkempt room. The agony had been broken and I was finally liberated from the silent torture…but something still lingered within my chest. My weary eyes glued themselves unto his face, his body, his lips, _anything_ that reminded me of how he used to be. A crinkling sound captivated my attention as I was forced to tear my gaze away from Lee. The boy seemed to be holding on to several large white plastic bags filled to the brim with something. He set them before my bed to answer the question in my mind. I gave him a puzzled look, but he motioned for me to peek. Rising weakly from my bed, I tentatively reached out my arm and pulled on the top of a bag with my index finger.

"Lee what are you…"

A surprised look stretched itself across my face when the bag's contents spilled all over my blanket. Instant ramen cups, chocolate, umeboshi, cookies, and a medley of hard candy were all that was needed for a stifled giggle to escape my dry throat. I peeked some more to find two bags filled with a variety of chips that would have put Choji's collection to shame.

"What? No ice cream?" I teased as I dumped all the bags on my bed to find none of the icy confection.

Lee shook his head. "I helped your mother put all the tubs away in the freezer…they would just melt here." He explained as he inspected his surroundings in awe. "And I do not think they would…fit anyway."

A blush crept to my cheeks when I realized he must've been shocked from seeing my disheveled room. I automatically resented my mom for dragging him in here in the first place. The whole place was in a state of chaos, it looked like _burglars_ had knocked up the place. Clothes were hastily strewed about the floor, stuffed animals from my early childhood gathered dust on my desk, shoes littered my jam-packed closet, and I could've _sworn_ that was a bra I saw under a couple of scrolls. Needless to say, I felt like burrowing deep within my blankets to pretend Lee wasn't here. I wanted to see him, I wanted to _talk_ to him, I wanted to _smile_ at him again! Just not…under these circumstances.

"You caught me _right_ in the middle of cleaning!" I lied as I blindly kicked several scrolls and sweaters under the covers of my bed.

"Oh did I now?" he asked as he raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms.

"Y-y-yeah! I-I mean it's great spring cleaning!"

"It is fall."

"_Exactly_!"

"I had not noticed." He replied dryly.

We stood quiet for several moments as I continued to curse my poor housecleaning skills.

"Well if you _must_ clean," Lee began as he picked up several scrolls and rolled them up, "I will help you if you will allow me…I need to talk to you anyway and it will be easier if I have my hands busy."

"S-sure…" I reluctantly accepted.

This was so bizarre…and yet…so relieving to talk to Lee in an almost amiable manner. It was as though the scalding tears, the inveterate spite, and the vindictive screams had never taken place. It seemed like such an innate behavior between the two of us yet it was something we dealt with caution lest it discomfited one of us. Cleaning my room had not exactly been on my schedule, but we had already begun and I was left with the task of making my bed.

'_So_ _much for chivalry, and here I was thinking you were going to tell me to sleep more._' I caviled with Lee over my lost sleep. (Although It was not as if I could find any as of late.)

"How have you been feeling?"

I stopped in the middle of dumping my pillows on my bed as I listened to his almost blasé question. It had been the first time in months I had heard him mention any concern for my health. I found myself struggling for an answer.

"I'm uh…I-I've been fine I guess."

"Have you not slept lately?"

"No…" I slowly replied like a rebuked child.

"Why is that?"

I was starting to feel like I was in therapy.

"Just haven't I guess." I mumbled, hoping he wouldn't expect more.

"Yes, but why not?" Lee _demanded_ to know.

Honesty seemed to exude from each of my responses as he continued to interrogate me. I wanted to _lie_, I wanted to say that I had been sleeping fine, that it was just lightheadedness, but there was nothing that could make me fabricate a simple word for him. The damned fool seemed to have a knack for receiving quick answers. I feared that if I didn't answer correctly another fight would erupt between the two of us.

"Because of you." I blurted out, lamenting it the moment I said it.

Lee turned his head away from the small mountain of scrolls I had stuffed in a corner, his eyes obviously thrown off by the odd reply. His look gave no indication of how he felt, but it was enough to make my stomach drop to my feet. I hated _that_ look, that look that told me nothing, that _unreadable_ look that made me self-conscious about anything I said or _did_.

"Ah."

He continued with his business unaffected by my assertion.

"'_Ah'_? Is that all you can say to me you idiot?" I aggressed, my futile attempts to pacify my dudgeon had gone astray.

He turned his attention back to me once more, abandoning the scrolls in the process, and seemed to be taking a deep breath to prevent any fights.

"What can you _possibly_ wish for me to say? Would you like me to _apologize_? Would you like me to say that I have fared no better than _you_ in finding rest at night? Would you like me to say that it is probably because of _you_ as well? Tell me Sakura- and I will say it so no quarrels rise between us."

Lee's words did nothing to conciliate my relentless mood as I glared at him. Did he just _want_ me to detest him? Had he just come to my house to make me feel puerile and insignificant? Whatever his motives were, I would allow him no time to act upon them.

"_No_! I just want you to say…_something_!" I exclaimed, trying not to throw a tantrum.

"Such as what?"

"ANYTHING!"

"I have already said everything I wanted a few seconds ago, _you_ are just far too frustrated to believe me."

"Well that's-!" I clamped my mouth shut as I practically choked on my fury and threw a pillow at his face (or at least tried to, considering he dodged kunai for a living.) "You're such a jerk Lee." I added childishly before setting the rest of the pillows on my made bed.

He again said nothing and rolled what was left of the scrolls back into their shelves.

We fell into another one of our daft silences, neither one of us willing to break it lest we broke our dignity as well. It was perdurable like the rest, but I found it was not irritating me like it usually did. In fact, the whole concept of keeping silent seemed inane to me. It was _hardly_ fair that he was the one always driving me to my knees in frustration. Lee had peeved me to no end, now _I_ was going to utterly break him until he screamed at me to stop.

"Hey Lee?"

"Yes?"

"Not that I'm complaining, but what's the deal with the artery cloggers? Is it some sort of edible peace offering?" I asked suspiciously as I eyed the heavenly candy.

He shrugged coolly as he dusted off my desk with a damp rag and began to throw my stuffed animals into a hamper. "More like a get well present…I know how much your life revolves around it."

I scoffed and began to organize my closet. "That's rich, coming from a guy who stuffed himself with said food during his missions."

It was Lee's turn to freeze what he doing and look at me with a quirked eyebrow. "So Neji told you?" he asked indifferently.

I tried to copy his reserved attitude while I faked interest in color coordinating my shoes. "No, Tenten did, but then again, Neji _did_ tell me a _lot_ of things too."

"Such as?"

I smirked as I turned my back toward him, acting like the shoes were _so_ much more important than anything _he_ had to say.

"Oh just things…like how you seemed to touch your lips every time you thought no one was looking, how you smiled when you were lost in your own thoughts, how you _talked_ in your sleep-the few hours you _did_ sleep that is." I _slightly_ exaggerated the source of my information and the person who had given it to me.

I casually flipped my ponytail across my shoulder _just_ in time Lee's eyes widened in shock and his blood shoot through his cheeks, making him stare at anything _but_ my form.

"You are lying…Neji would never say such a thing." He muttered, holding the façade of someone unaffected by my gossip.

"_Really_? You'd be surprised what some morphine and a couple shots of sedatives can do to the tongue! He's actually quite the talker. We talked for _hours_ and _hours_ while we stitched his wounds. He also said that when you were eleven years old you-"

"That is _also_ rich coming from someone who did not heal _me_ but had _ample_ time talking to another one of her patients." He pointed out before I could finish my derision.

"I didn't want to see someone who _mooned_ me at some point while I was rescuing him!"

"Rescue? You _tore_ my stitches apart!"

"Only after you-!" Again, I forced my mouth shut before I said something I would later regret. There was no way I'd be vindictive enough to rouse memories of the night he had arrived. I'd be damned before I made Lee remember something over which he had no control. My scorn for him was no longer that pungent.

"After I what?" Lee asked curiously.

A playful smile tugged at his lips, making me feel like this fight was little more than a lighthearted farce to him.

"After…I ah…forget it. J-just forget it, I'm wasting my breath on you." I quickly recovered with a joke.

Lee's forehead wrinkled as his eyebrows shot up in surprise. "And here I was waiting for a mind-blowing retort that would send my blood boiling." He said, the mischievous smile never leaving his face.

"Yeah…" I randomly concurred.

'_If only you knew._'

"Since we are talking again, where do you usually put your bras?"

I gasped and my face grew white as milk in mortification when I remembered the bra hidden under a scroll. It was far too late to be merely embarrassed.

"Gimmethat!" I ordered in a single word as I jumped to my feet and spun around to jerk the undergarment he held innocently in his open palm.

I held the white bra close to me as though it was something precious and hid it from Lee's view. It was not lacy or frilly, it wasn't made out of silk, it wasn't even a push up bra! Then _why_ did I feel like I wanted to hang myself once he was gone?

"I see now…you _gawk_ at my boxers so you automatically assume that I will do the same to you and ogle your undergarments."

"Well what _else_ can I think with you asking me something as perverted as _that_!?" I all but screamed as my privacy was evaded with each thing he said.

Lee sighed and held his arms akimbo in exasperation. I shut my eyes closed for the inevitable upbraiding I would receive over how "_I_ was the one who was a pervert" and how I put "_Jiraiya_ to shame!"

"I was not even thinking that…Sakura, I respect you more than that and you know it."

Lee's mellifluent and unexpected words fell in the room with a dead silence, startling me.

I looked at him, hoping to find a trace of mirth in his voice, hoping to find something that would imply he _really_ thought I was a pervert. When I found nothing but sincerity in his face, it was _my_ turn to keep quiet and continue on with my business.

What would have taken me _years_ to commit to, Lee helped me perfect in under two hours. The room was spotless, (save for the bras I had hastily stuffed inside one of my drawers for later use.) I could actually see the _floor_ now instead of a sea of junk and clothes. Shoes that usually took me hours to find before were neatly lined up in a row inside my closet and ready for use. Clothes were either thrown into the hamper, folded, or hung up in organized hangers. Stuffed animals were neatly placed in boxes to be kept in the attic and strewn shuriken and kunai were stored in pouches to prevent a serious accident with my oblivious mom. My bed (made for the first time in years) now looked inviting instead of repulsive. It was so inviting in fact, that it was all I could do from collapsing on it face down.

"Ahh, this is great…I don't think I've seen my room this neat in _years_!" I exclaimed gleefully to Lee as I scooted toward my pillows and motioned for him to sit.

He accepted the request and _uneasily_ sat two feet away from me.

"Well, I am glad you like your room now…I just hope it stays that way for some time." He advised while idly playing with the lone stuffed animal I had insisted on keeping on my bed.

"Oh it will…thank you so much Lee." I said, my gratitude immensely growing.

"You are certainly welcome." He responded softly as he continued to stare at the toy like he had never seen one before in his life.

"You having fun there?" I taunted as I tried to grab the plush dog away from him.

Lee, infamous for his speed, easily dodged my hand and held the animal an arm's width away from me. I pouted and shrugged, but quickly smiled as I set my sights on the forgotten food he had bought me.

"You are not seriously going to eat it _now_ are you?" He asked as he set the dog on his lap. "That is part of the reason why you are sick!"

I nodded zealously like an idiot and grabbed a bag of chocolates, ripping its wrapper in the process.

"It's your own fault for buying them for me!" I snickered as I bit a chunk of the sucrose infested treat. "You want some?" I asked, my cheeks protruding from my face from the confection inside my mouth.

Lee merely chuckled and shook his head, preferring instead to look at the dog.

I had to roll my eyes. "Geez Lee…what's up with you and the dog? You can have it if you want to play with it that badly."

"I do not care about the dog." He said with a perfunctory tone.

"Then what are you thinking ab-"

Something…strange happened, or least that's the only way I could describe it. Lee's light contact against my skin was both needed and rebuffed as my body shuddered in fear. His bandaged fingers discarded the dog and carefully pulled away my chocolate, being so tentative as to not rouse any alarm. I was confused, but soon learned what was on his mind. He revealed my once concealed bruises on my wrists, now far from having their usual black and purple luster. The grim colors I had tried fervently to hide had now long subsided to a light maroon as days had passed. The look on his face made my chest swell with something resembling sympathy as one of his hands softly rested on my wrists. I couldn't say I had completely forgiven him yet. (I was still bitter and as cruel as our first encounter over the matter.)

"Lee, what are you-"

"Please forgive me." He quickly said as he caressed the injured flesh with his fingers. "Please forgive me…for hurting you."

His spontaneous apology had surprised my nervous system into allowing my muscles to move again (though I wished I could've stayed immobile from what I was about to do.)

"Lee…I…"

Words were futile under these circumstances. If I wished to say something, I soon realized that I would have to _show_ it.

"Sakura please…I am sorry for this…I do not expect you to forgive me. I am…beyond that…I just need you to know." He whispered dejectedly.

His words rung inside my mind and gave rise to suppressed memories from long ago. Memories made in my house…during a rainstorm. The night before he had left me…I had said those forlorn words. The echoes of my pounding heart found their way into my head, not allowing me a moment's rest. Lee's fingers gently trailed over each bruise he had given me with his once formidable strength. He was being so tender now…I never would have thought this was the same boy I had been forced to fight. I wanted to say he had changed. I _wanted_ to say he had returned to being the same maudlin boy who had confessed his love to me, the one who had risked his life against three Sound ninja merely for the slim chance of being my boyfriend.

"Lee…," I finally began as I slipped my battered wrist away from his soothing hands. "You didn't know…it's not your fault…" I tried blindly to ignore the constriction in my chest as I felt my hands empty of his touch.

The idiot took it as a sign of refusal and promptly stared down at his _own_ deserted hands with a look of dismay.

"N-no!" I exclaimed as I quickly took both his hands and rested them on my lap. "I just…I just never expected you-_this_ to happen. I thought for sure I would never see you again after you…left."

Again, Lee chuckled, but his laugh seemed dry…bitter. "I did not _want_ to come back Sakura. Not after the way I treated you, not after the way I treated _everyone_."

"But you _did_! That's what matters right now. You came back to help your friends."

"Only because I was a coward…I am nothing Sakura. My father said so himself when he saw me. He just repeated what I already knew…" he mumbled, his eyes reminiscent of that fateful meeting.

Another jab of pain pricked my chest as he mentioned that bastard.

"Lee, no don't-"

"That I am worthless, that I am better off dead, that I am nothing but a damn piece of trash that will never amount to anything but-"

"Lee. Shut up."

My hands were no longer content with being stationary; the damn things had a mind of their own. They gradually crept to his rising chest and rested there, waiting for any signs of approval or alarm from Lee. The young man, now deathly silent from my actions, shifted his gaze to where my hands dared to venture, but no words were heard from me. My hands trembled from the slight touch as I felt his chest release a quivering breath in response. Taking his lack of composure as an indication to continue, I began to cautiously raise them higher than my conscience would allow. One of them stopped below his neck, the other…stopped before the tips of my fingers reached his lips. Tremor was evident in my face from the unmitigated gall of my actions. Lee seemed to find no objections to what I was doing; in fact he seemed all but _eager_ to see where this physical contact would lead us.

'_He looks like he wants to be kissed.' _

The thought raced through my mind as I felt some of his hot anxious breath from his lightly parted lips on my hand. My fingers were dangerously close to them, edging closer to their destination, wanting to _pull_ him towards me. They finally rested on his lower lip and contemplated on what other sacrilege to commit next. His face continued to resemble that of a admonished and abused child as my middle and index finger slowly caressed his bottom lip, _painfully_ taking its time to touch every edge of it.

He kissed them both before I realized it.

My arm being pulled by a gentle force left me shocked as he kissed the tips of my fingers, the palm of my hand, and finally placed his lips on my battered wrists.

"I-I uh…" I stuttered idiotically. What had brought this extreme change in Lee I did not know, all I knew was that I was struggling to even _breathe_.

The bewilderment eventually gave way to fright when I saw what his next actions were. His sinewy body slowly leaned towards me, his fingers sensually tilting my chin closer to him. Panic rang through my body as I felt the shifting weight on the creaking bed considerably.

'_But I…' _

The thought was left unsaid as I pounced off the bed in alarm from his tantalizing proximity and nearly took him with me in the process. Apparently, I had been trying to avoid his lips by scooting further into the edge of the damn bed.

"Sakura!" he exclaimed with a tinge of embarrassment as he saw me land on the floor in a rather ungraceful manner.

My actions might have been a bit…juvenile, I knew that, but I would not kiss him. I _couldn't_! I would _not_ allow him that console just yet, not after all the predicaments we had endured. There was no way I could expect to simply _kiss_ _away_ my complex relationship with Lee. To allow even _myself_ that luxury seemed like sheer mendacity. If I _planned_ to help him, if my purpose was to _truly_ help him regain some of his life, then I would need to be objective and put such a thoughtless panacea to the side. It didn't matter how many _glimpses_ I saw of the boy I loved, they meant nothing to me if he would soon revert to his depressed self once the laughter had subsided and the embraces faded. I intended to completely resurface him. Only then could I even consider the mere _possibility_ of rebuilding my relationship with Lee.

My rear, having been slammed with all my weight into the hard carpet, began to excruciatingly ache as I tried to stand up and regain some of my dignity. I could feel the warmth of my blood rise to my face when I saw Lee's extended hand in front of me.

'_God…kill me now._' 

I reluctantly accepted the courtly assistance and was easily lifted back up on my feet with a swift pull from him.

"I…I apologize Sakura." The boy muttered as he sat me back down on the bed.

"F-for what? I-I was just being stupid and fell over!"

"No…that is not…that is not what I am apologizing for…I should have asked you first." He attempted to explain once more in vain.

"Asked me for what?" I asked stupidly while I tried to eschew the subject.

Lee bit the lower side of his lip, the struggle to explicate obvious in his disconcerting eyes. Oh god those lips…the way he bit them, the way his fingers fidgeted together, and the way his eyes continued to shift endlessly through the room reminded me a coy child confessing to his first crush. Seeing such insecure movements congregated something inside me, something I couldn't control.

"Asked to _kiss_ you of course!" he exclaimed, red hues embellishing his cheeks. "Please forgive me Sakura, that was…quite _lewd_ of me."

Pressure built up on my sides, threatening to burst through my stomach. A strain held against my chest for far too long suddenly dissipated into nothing. It took me several moments to realize my own laughter was filling the room. I clutched the side of my abdomen as the relieving action surprised Lee.

I was beginning to see precious glimpses of that boy I thought I lost.

"I'm sorry Lee! I'm sorry! It's just that-that," I tried not to cackle as I talked, "you just…you just looked so _cute_ right now!"

Lee continued to stare at me with wide innocent eyes, obviously not understanding what the hilarity was over his apology. My compliment had sufficed in making him feel even _more_ timid than I thought possible. What did I care?

I was laughing.

_Laughing_.

Something I hadn't done since he had left.

My crazed giggles subsided at some point, leaving me battling for breath as I leaned back on the bed with a satisfied smile.

"Are you done yet?" Lee asked, almost sulking and clueless as to what I had done.

"Yeah…oh my…Lee…I haven't…done that since…"

"Yes, I can see you have not had a chance to laugh for quite some time."

"Because of _you_."

What I had hoped to be a joke ended up as the death of our amiable conversation. I hadn't meant for Lee to look so somber, his eyes reverting to the floor in perplexity. I hadn't meant for him to feel culpable about anything that had happened-just like I wish I hadn't meant my rejection for his kiss. But I had to do it for both our sakes lest we lamented our hasty actions. I had no need to make our kiss some fleeting extempore act. At this point, his kisses, his touch--his _words_ were trivial. Any sensuous urges would have to be ignored if I was to help him recover.

"I am sorry Sakura…please forgive me…"

"How much longer are you going to keep apologizing?" I complained, rubbing my stinging backside.

Lee merely looked at me in puzzlement, but sat back down with me on the bed.

"You do not respond to my apology…that is why I need to keep repeating myself for you…"

"Well look-I've already told you I forgive you. It's not your fault all right? So stop beating yourself up about it." I said resignedly, looking forward to a respite after the tumultuous task of avoiding his enticing lips.

"Th-thank you." His succinct words wavered as he said them.

'_The idiot probably thought I wouldn't forgive him or something._' I thought sympathetically.

"Yeah well…anyway, I think it's _you_ who should be forgiving _me_." I pointed out, remembering my callous remarks on my first visit. "I was…really mean to you and I-I…I said some things that I didn't mean."

"You said nothing that is not already true Sakura, think noting of it." He answered, exacerbating my guilt and compassion for him.

"There you go again Lee! Why do you _always_ belittle yourself? Why do you _always_ think the worst of everything?!" I exclaimed, finding my voice harder to keep in check while my mother was inside the house.

Lee shrugged, ruminating on my questions for a moment. "I have never been told anything aside from what you already know. So I suppose…it must be true."

"Lee…you're really stupid you know that?"

"Yes, I have been called that on occasion as well." He responded seriously to my mocking question.

"When have _I_ ever told you that you were _worthless_? When have _I_ ever told you that you would never amount to anything?" I asked, wanting desperately to convince his abusive thinking.

"…Never…but my father-"

"Forget about that bastard for once in your life Lee!" I cried out, taking both his hands in my own. "He knows nothing about you Lee! He doesn't know what an accomplished ninja you are! He doesn't know how many people care about you or would risk their lives for you! He doesn't know a DAMN thing about you Lee!"

My supplications went by unheeded by him as he stared right through me, his mouth formed in a perfect round circle of disbelief. He could gawk at me as though I were an idiot all he wanted, I didn't care. All I cared about was getting those horrible ideas out of his head. He deserved so much more than this…so much more than some jerk telling him these insipid lies. If I had to cram different ideals into that obdurate head of his then so be it.

"Sakura…" he breathed in confusion. "I-I…I cannot help but to think this way…it is what I am. I am nothing more than some insignificant-" 

"Lee, SHUT. UP." I ordered before he could disparage himself any further. "You are NOT insignificant. You are NOT worthless. You. Are. _Important_. You're important to Gai Sensei, to Neji, to Tenten and…to _me_."

Lee seemed to be satisfied with that answer (or at least silent from the shock of it.) He looked at our entwined fingers askance.

"I am sorry Sakura." He whispered.

"Forget about it already…you didn't know that the drug-"

"It still does not excuse the fact that I hurt you! I should have been stronger! I-I should have tried to fight it off!…How can I call myself a man knowing that I harmed you!?" he asked despondently as his eyes traveled to my fading bruises.

I grabbed his chin as I freed one hand and forced him to look at my face. "It. Doesn't. _Matter_. Lee. It doesn't matter how strong you are, if the body is drugged or poisoned it takes its toll with no control!"

"I…I am sor-"

I did not allow him to finish his apology as I jerked my hands away from him and wrapped them around his shoulders, pulling him toward me in a tight embrace. I was sick of forgiving him when he had not even forgiven _me_ for all the things I had done.

"Don't be. A real man would have the courage to admit when he's wrong and apologize." I soothed as I rubbed his back. "You've been doing that since you got here!" I added, trying to earn a grin from him.

I succeeded for an evanescent moment as his lips slowly lifted into a lopsided smile and quickly disappeared.

"And I'm sorry too. For all the immature crap I said. I don't regret saving you and I don't wish you were dead…I'd…" there was no much else I could say since I didn't want to ruin the comforting physical contact.

'_I'd give my life for you Lee._'

"Does this mean you do not hate me anymore?" he asked cautiously.

"Of course not." I said with a laugh as I pressed his head closer against my shoulder. "But…hey Lee?"

"Yes?"

"I'm really happy that you…you know came."

"I am just happy that we did not crash against one another."

We shared a smile, the kind that forgave any acrid words and imprudent acts, the kind that revealed a shred of hope and a warming tolerance. But most importantly, it was the kind that appeared like simple amity…but hid the potential to be so much more.

I just prayed nothing happened that would ruin it.

"SAKURA! I'M COMING UP THE STAIRS! I DON'T KNOW IF YOU'RE DOING ANYTHING UP THERE, BUT I JUST WANTED TO WARN YOU!" My mother's booming voice from downstairs nearly made the walls in my room shake. 

She always seemed to be _right_ on cue to appear whenever I thought about her.

Much to my dismay, Lee instantly pulled away from my arms and sat up from the bed. He tried to look as though we were simply having a "friendly" chat as he pulled the chair from my desk and sat _several_ feet away from me. The distance he placed between us was almost ridiculous considering the chair was placed in the opposite side of the room.

"Why are you so proper around her? She won't mind if you're just _sitting_ on the bed!" I hissed in my lowest voice as I heard my mom's footsteps coming up the stairs.

Lee shook his head and crossed his arms. "I do not wish for her to think less of me."

"So you're doing that by sitting _miles_ away from me? You're so freaking weird I sw-"

"Hellooo! What have we here? Oh, don't _you_ two look so cute together, having a nice chat and all that." My mother cooed as she saw the proper distance between us. Her eyes, however, looked like they were about to fall out when she noticed the floor.

"Hi mom! Look we-"

"_Holy_! Y-you cleaned your _ROOM_!" my mother cried in amazement as she inspected her spotless surroundings.

"Yeah, Lee helped me and-"

"Lee, what did you _BRIBE_ her with!? I've got to _know_!" my mother had completely shut me out as she took interest in the boy sitting in the far corner of my room. "I'll _PAY_ you to come over more often!"

Her eyes gleamed in joy as she took the bewildered ninja and hugged him...

_Hard_.

I cringed in fear when I thought I heard bones cracking. I'm sure he was probably _used_ to it with Gai…but there was a _slight_ difference in being pressed against a flat sculpted chest and one that was….a _bit_ more ample. Though his body and face were hidden from my view, I could still see that Lee's knuckles had turned deathly white as he clutched the sides of the chair like his life depended on it.

"Thank you Lee! You're such a sweet boy!" my mom praised, completely oblivious to a couple of things suffocating him.

The look he had when my mother finally released him and allowed him to breath made me laugh out loud. His face was bright as blood and his eyes were widened in extreme discomfort. It almost made me jealous that it hadn't been _me_ to bring this state out of him.

"Y-you…you are welcome ma'am." He answered all while trying desperately to clear his throat and hide his florid cheeks.

"You made me worry for a second Lee! I was starting to wonder when you'd come back and visit Sakura and me. She can't seem to find _any_ half decent me-"

"Mom, are you leaving for work again?" I interrupted her with a sweetly threatening voice to try and salvage what was left of my privacy.

She gave me an innocent look that seemed to ask me what she did wrong. "Oh yes…but I'll be back tomorrow Sakura! It's a short trip over to Tanzaku Town so I won't be long, I might even be back in time for dinner tomorrow, I promise!"

"Oh." I mumbled miserably, "Well…take care I guess."

"I know it seems like I just got here, but I am already behind on my work as it is from the days I took care of you." My mother tried to excuse her predictable long absence.

"No…it's all right mom. I'll see you later okay? Take care."

"Well, why don't you and Lee go out tonight with your friends? Or you can stay in here and have fun cooking like last time!"

Every time she tried to cheer me up by indulging me with outings or money it only seemed to aggravate my gloomy mood. It didn't matter how much money she left on the kitchen counter, it didn't matter that she _always_ gave me permission to see friends…I just wanted her here more than _two_ days for once.

"I will take my leave now, thank you so much for allowing me to visit your daughter Mrs. Haruno." Lee seemed to team up with my mother to abandon me.

'_Do they just not __**want**__ to be around me?_' I joked as my mother gave Lee a surprised look.

"Do you really have to leave so soon? I was hoping you could keep Sakura company a bit longer!" she shamelessly pleaded.

A mother who seemed so permissive was certainly a rarity. I didn't know any girl who wouldn't kill to have her. That damn irony of wishing for a straitlaced homemaker mom was ridiculing me this instant.

"I apologize…I do not think it is proper to be alone in the house with your daughter." He explained all while still trying to control his crimson face when I stuck my tongue out at him from behind my mother.

I quickly sucked it back in when the woman turned around and motioned with her eyes to say something. It seemed she _really_ wanted to convince him to stay.

"Unless…" he began before clearing his throat again, "unless you would allow me to take your daughter out for a walk around the village."

She gave me that same goofy smile that resembled my blonde teammate's and turned back to face Lee's offer. "Sure Lee. She'd _love_ to go! I'm sure you two will have fun!"

'_Gee, don't mind __**me**__…just __**completely**__ shut me out of this conversation._' A vein popped from my forehead.

"That is…if Sakura accepts my invitation." Lee changed his gaze over to me as if expecting an answer.

I was half tempted to say no just to see what their reactions would be, but quickly went against it. (There was no way I'd be stupid enough to pass up an opportunity to talk to Lee without some nagging instructor, gossiping nurses, or an annoying Hyuga on my back.) My head slowly nodded in approval.

"Then it's settled!" My mother chimed, "You two go out and I go make money!"

'_What the hell was my dad __**smoking**__ when she proposed to this woman?_'

Lee could only smile nervously. (Probably wondering the same thing.)

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The house once again seemed desolate without my mother's elated yells and airy giggles. It was not as though I was alone though. I splashed some water in the bathtub as I scrubbed the soap on my legs. After what had felt like _days_ of living inside a hospital, I was grateful I could finally cleanse my body. The lukewarm water engulfed my body, its bubbles tickling my skin. I leaned my head back and sighed in pleasure as I massaged shampoo into my hair. My body had long deserved this. The fact that Lee was still waiting in my room did nothing to rush my bath time. That boy would just have to wait if he ever wanted his date.

"Date." I whispered the word as though it was forbidden.

My cheeks flushed with excitement over the fun we could have. We could walk around the forests surrounding our village, we could go over to a restaurant and stuff our faces, or we could just be lazy and I could force him to stay at home to cook with me.

'_Yeah right, like __**I'd**__ need his help cooking now_.' I snorted and nearly yelped in pain when shampoo got in my eye. Damn karma.

I washed away the rest of the soap and jumped out of the tub, wondering how long I had taken.

"Sakura…HOW. MUCH. LONGER? You have been in there for almost two _hours_." I heard a familiar voice whine through the hallway connecting my room.

"Lee, unless you're going to help me wash, I don't want to hear anything from you." I scolded loud enough for him to hear. I patted my skin dry with a towel and put on my usual red attire.

The stunned silence that followed was all I needed to hear to know Lee was probably blushing.

"All right all right, I'm out already." I called out as I opened the door, releasing endless clouds of steam. "You've always been impatient haven't you Lee?" I teased when I entered my room.

"No, _you_ just have a knack to test the patience of a _saint_." He retorted as he lied flat on his stomach on the bed.

I quirked an eyebrow at his questionable flexibility and wondered how he could spread out his entire body over the mattress.

"Doesn't your stomach still hurt?" I asked, my curiosity piqued from his wound.

Lee flipped his body over so he could see me. "It has been a few days since you last saw me…plus the chakra of Lady Tsunade can work wonders." He said as he lifted the bottom of his black shirt to reveal a thin white scar.

The tiny healed wound only captivated me for a diminutive amount of time as I gawked at something _much_ more appealing.

His legs were far apart from each other since he was still sprawled on my bed. The sight of him practically _enticing_ me by lifting up his shirt and revealing his abs ON MY BED was more than enough to overwork my salivary glands. His face naively cocked to one side as he wondered why my eyes were glazed and my breath trembled with each second that passed. It might not have been his intentions, but this man had a way to get a girl excited over anatomy. A gelid shower was the first thing that came to mind to stop my slavering.

"Hm? Is something wrong?" he asked innocently.

"I uh…I uh…I like…"

'_I like your body…_'

I mentally kicked myself.

"I like your shirt…but it looks like something Tenten would wear." I joked since the black apparel was almost an _exact_ copy of the pink shirt she used to wear.

"Oh? Is that why you gave me that look?"

"_What_ look?"

"The one that you are currently trying to wipe from your face." He replied offhandedly with a sense of triumph.

"I…I don't understand." I mumbled, blood seeping to my face.

"If you say so." He said back as he released the fabric of his shirt and concealed his stomach from my viewing pleasure.

'_Damn!_'

"What was I _supposed_ to be looking at exactly?" I inquired, trying to appear as though I wasn't some licentious woman.

Lee chuckled and placed both his hands behind his head as he rested on a pillow. "Well, _you_ were the one staring…"

"Well, you're giving me a free show here! It's not _MY_ fault! I-I can't help it!" I exclaimed irascibly.

He sighed and stretched his weary (bulging) muscles, looking as though he had not heard me. "Are you ready? What would you like to do?"

'_You_.'

Again, I had to slap my alter ego into submission.

"Uh, ah, whatever _YOU_ want to do. You're the one that invited me after all." I reasoned while I flopped on the bed with him and hugged a pillow.

Lee's eyes shifted towards me as he turned his body over and propped his head with one elbow.

"If _I_ asked you to accompany me then that means _you_ get to decide what we shall do."

'_Make out_.'

My hormones were out of whack lately.

"So unless you insist on making love and kissing with that face of yours, I will suggest going out."

My mouth stood open for so long I swore drool fell into my pillow. I'm surprised I _had_ any drool to spare since my tongue was sere and useless. Parts of my brain shut down as I tried to process what had left his lips. If this was his idea of a joke then I was ready to strangle him. Lee simply continued to look at me as though there was nothing wrong with his words.

"You were thinking it, were you not?" he asked with a tone that I swore sounded…_almost_ seductive.

I just violently shook my head in response (I had no time for such promiscuity.)

He laughed quietly and, to my chagrin, lazed his head back into the pillow.

"Actually, if you would rather stay here all day I would not mind. You can use the rest." He remarked as he studied my body with transitory glances.

I gave him a clueless shrug and impulsively rested my head on the opposite side of his pillow. Sighing in contentment, I curled my body into a fetal position.

"Do you enjoy being this…" Lee couldn't even finish his question from the propinquity between us.

Although my body was on the opposite side of him, my position allowed me to feel strands of his hair tickling my forehead. I practically inhaled him, enveloping the rich scent of his usual soap and motley of spices I could not delineate. It almost reminded me of something my father wore in the few times he went out with my mother. Cologne? Aftershave? Whatever it was, I had never dealt with anything so intoxicating and exciting yet so _frustrating_ in my life. My lips wanted to seize his own, but I couldn't exactly kiss him upside down.

'_This is how a man __**should**__ smell._'

"What _do_ I enjoy Lee?" I asked absentmindedly, too obsessed with his flawless sense of hygiene to care.

"Do you? That is…do you enjoy being this…_close_ to me?" he mumbled as he scooted several inches away from me.

"Why shouldn't I? You smell nice." I answered, still in the midst of my trancelike state.

"That is not what I…meant. But… it does not bother you? After everything I did, why are you still so…so _kind_?" he continued to ask, _begging_ for a reason to hate his existence.

"I'm a fool I suppose…I can't help myself."

Somewhat content with my answer, Lee edged closer to the distance he once was. I could never understand him and his way of thinking.

"Hey…Lee?" It was my turn for self-conscious questions. It was not as though I was looking for compliments; my curiosity was just gnawing at my heart with something it urgently needed to know.

"Yes?"

I bit my lip, not quite knowing how to start. Lee already knew he had my forgiveness, he already knew he owned some salvaged parts of my friendship, and I was certain he had even conciliated with my spiteful words but…

'_Have you forgiven me?_'

"Lee…do you…do you still hate me?" I slowly asked and held breath for any form of relieving amorous words.

The silence that followed made my chest constrict and shred in two.

He had a look in his eyes that made the very air in my lungs want to deteriorate. I was grateful I was resting on a bed for my weight would have been too much for my enervated knees to endure. Lee turned his head away from me, completely shutting me out from his view.

Something wet and stinging wanted to pour from my eyes.

"Sakura…I…"

'_Tell me you don't hate me…tell me you love me …__**tell**__ me you're sorry._'

My mental pleading took a plunge into a merciless truth.

"I do not know…"

My heart was drowned…drowned in an endless void of susceptibility and obscurity.

Never to be heard from again.

I kept silent, wondering how he was capable of still harboring such vituperative feelings for me. My hand thoughtlessly seized something within my throbbing chest that was unwilling to deal with the agony of having to hear him. The plenary aches and pricks reveled in tormenting my heart and killing my hope. Tears were kept at bay as I waited for him to speak more, to tell me it had been a joke, to tell me he only wanted to see the expression on my face, to tell me _anything_. I waited and waited…

But nothing else was heard.

"Why…why…" I attempted to form words, my voice as heavy as the feeling in my chest.

"Please do not ask me that again Sakura."

Aversion flared within my mind, fueling a fire I knew I would regret feeding.

"Then why did you try to kiss me? Why attempt that if you hate me!? What kind of a sick bastard does-"

Lee silenced me with a glare and a frustrated growl as he gathered himself from the bed.

"I DO NOT KNOW SAKURA! I do not _KNOW_ why you make me want to kiss you! All I know is that you—you make me _FEEL_ things damn it!"

This did nothing to dissipate my hateful tirade for him. It merely gave it incentive to flourish. I raised my body and sat on the bed, wanting to create as much distance between him as possible.

"HOW THE…HOW CAN YOU SAY SUCH A _SELFISH_ THING!? _HOW_…how can you hate me and expect to kiss me you…you bastard?!" Again, I had lapsed back into calling him by my favorite nickname.

Lee tried to match my deadly glare, failing miserable from something he saw in me. I was not willing to admit defeat, I wanted to _win_ damn it, I wanted to show him that I deserved his love even after all the affliction he had given me.

"Sakura…I do not know. I cannot…maybe I was just a self-righteous fool for coming here…all I did was make you cry…"

"I'M _NOT_ CRYING!" I screamed, swearing that the liquid streaming down my face was not tears.

Of course…it had taken me several moments to realize that I _was_ sobbing like a child. A pitiful, helpless, naïve, annoying child.

"Lee…do you just want us to _hate_ each other again? We were talking as if we were friends mere seconds ago…why do you…why do you do this to us?" I asked, frantically wiping away tears with my palms.

His face softened as my words sunk into whatever heart he had left. Sobs continued to rack my body and I plummeted back into the console of my pillows. I curled up in a moribund ball of misery and waited for more searing remarks from the man. It didn't matter what he said now, it was all empty trivial words. I wanted death now, I _prayed_ for it. Anything was better than being jerked around so cruelly by a man who disregarded my feelings as well as his own. The bed slowly descended, but I gave it no mind until I felt Lee's presence close to my coiled body.

"GO AWAY!" I screamed as I furiously flung my open hand aimlessly against seemingly thin air.

My hand throbbing with a familiar sting was all it took to make me realize I had slapped him yet again.

Lee cupped his cheek, his face unreadable as I flung my hand at him once more to push myself away. He disregarded my loud entreating and my hand continuously slapping him away, rejecting him endlessly. I delivered a blow with enough strength to burst open his lower lip, but he continued to advance towards me all while ignoring the stinging pain in his face.

"Please…just go…just let me cry alone." I begged ineffectually.

My hand eventually grew sore from beating him repeatedly across the face. The only option that was left was to try to shove him away from me. It was futile and almost pathetic in my exhausted state.

"Sakura I-" Lee was cut off with the last slap I could muster.

"GO! GET THE HELL OUT OF MY HOUSE!" I cried, garnering strength to strike him again.

Lee took hold of my hand with his own, finally leaving me powerless to try and stop his advances.

"Sakura please…I am sorry…" he could utter nothing else as his free hand rose to touch the side of my face.

His fingers carefully traced along my cheeks and eyes, rubbing away my tears that never ceased to end. I growled from the unexpected contact as I tried to move further away from his caress. He allowed no such thing and pulled my weary body towards his chest. His touch seemed like poison to me now, a poison that would soon kill me if I did nothing, yet…

"What else do you want Lee!? What else could you _POSSIBLY_ want!? Do you enjoy _breaking_ me?" I spat my words like his poisonous touch.

As my tears soon dampened his shirt I wondered when I would soak it. I curled my hands into tight fists and beat them on his chest, wanting more than anything to despise him. His heartbeat echoed through my ears as he pressed his body closer to me. The nervous throbbing of the organ was maddening, but I was left to bear it.

"Why?...Why?" I sobbed as I finally gave in to his embrace.

Lee's lips trailed along my cheeks, but didn't dare to kiss me. They simply brushed against my skin and mingled their drying specks of blood with my tears.

I didn't think he knew how to kiss even if he _wanted_ to.

He knew nothing of affection.

I puled when his ripped lips abandoned my skin, leaving me to torment over what could have been possible that moment.

"I…I do not know Sakura. Forgive me." He whispered. "But I _want_ to love you…you have no _idea_ how much I do."

"Then why?"

"I just…" he tried to explain as he awkwardly rested his forehead against my own.

"What?"

"I just do not know how."

We lied on the bed with an awkward sense of guilt long after our words had faded. Our tangled arms and legs would not allow us a comfortable position in our embrace, but I didn't mind.

I don't think he did either.

My pitiful sniffles were the only sounds being made across the room, adding to my shame of being so sentimental. Lee gently brushed his cheek against my own in hopes of pacifying me, but the contact only made me feel _worse_ for needing the lavished attention. I didn't want his view of me to be this self-centered spoiled girl who always needed ego pampering. I didn't want his lasting memory of me to be of that needy and obsessed genin who always needed saving-who _always_ screwed up. I shuddered as his nose playfully poked my own. _He_ was the one who was far too kind.

Not I.

_I_ was horrible and spoiled.

_I_ was the one who was weak.

_I_ was the one who was worthless.

I exploded into a new fit of tears as I disparaged myself.

"Sakura? What is the matter _now_?" Lee asked, unaware of my mental breakdown.

"I'm such a worthless, helpless, naïve, weak IDIOT!" I sobbed as I clung to his soaked shirt.

Lee opened his mouth, but quickly closed it. He was probably wondering how he could spare any kind words when he _himself_ was never given any when he questioned his existence. He shook his head and pulled me closer toward his body, warming both of us.

I suppose that was his way of proving me wrong.

"I really…want to love you too Lee…" I whispered in his ear as I ran my hand through his chest. "But you are making it so _damn_ hard."


	23. Unforseen Carousing

Well hello 'alo! I hope you are all well! Again, I don't know how many times I've had to apologize for updating so late! College is a tad bit harder than expected, but at least I'm passing all my exams! I made a lot of new friends and I've even had time to go out and have fun. I hope everyone's Halloween was great. (It was tempting to dress up in that aerobic instructor/Gai/Lee/80's get up again, but I figured I had tortured myself enough with my friends.) Thank you guys so much for your patience and support, not to mention your lovely and encouraging reviews! Nothing motivates me more to finish the next chapter! I really hope you guys enjoy this one, and again, I'm sorry for taking so long with the updates. Work, college, and writing do NOT mix well together. So as always, until now and to the end, Read, Enjoy, and Recommend!

**Unforeseen Carousing**

It had taken me several attempts to find a comfortable position to embrace the sinewy form before me. We had stopped talking long after we were left enervated and sick from the unnecessary outbreak of emotions. My vigorous sobs had eventually died out, giving way to intermittent sniffs. I was grateful of that since I no longer wished for Lee to see me in this disgraceful state. Countless minutes had easily turned into hours as we continued to lie in bed in a blissful silence. I had melted into his touch long ago, completely filling his arms with my body and leaving the abusive physical rejections behind me. Lee sighed quietly as he brushed his cheek against my own for a second time.

"Do you feel better now?" he whispered affectionately, his breath tickling my ear.

I shrugged halfheartedly, not quite knowing a proper response.

"Why do you _talk_ to me like this?" I suddenly asked, ready for another round of meaningless quarrels.

"What do you mean? Like what?" he hardly answered my question as his arms pulled me closer to him.

I accepted the contact stoically, seeing as how he insisted on holding me as though I was his property.

"You _talk_ to me as if you had feelings for me, you even _touch_ me as if you did. Why is that?" I asked clearly, wanting heatedly to know for I was sick of his kind soothing words and delusions. I had stopped shoving him away, but that _hardly_ meant I would keep silent about his peculiar treatment.

Lee's hold around me weakened slightly at my question as he gave me a pensive face.

"I do not know." He quietly gave me the same reply.

"Again with the selfish answers." I cut in exasperatedly.

"It is not _selfish_ Sakura!" he tried to defend himself.

"Then _what_ is it?"

"Desperate? Impulsive perhaps? I do not know Sakura." He mumbled as he ran his right thumb over my forehead to push away stray strands of my hair. "All I know is that you make feel helpless if I do not act upon these feelings."

"So it's simply for your own _pleasure_?" I accused blatantly, disgusted by the light contact on my head.

Lee shook his head, his hair swaying in a frantic fashion as he did so. "No! Sakura, I respect you far too much to caress you simply because of something as objectionable as lust!"

"But there's nothing wrong with that…it's typical for guys to want sex even if they don't really care for the girl." I continued to degrade all men in general.

I knew I was being impudent and far too offensive, but I needed to know why he was being so illogical…so _stupid_! I needed to search for what would bring Lee to the edge. As if to prove my point, I began to trace my fingers against his well-built arms. My hand ran through his figure, stopping furtively to rub the muscles hidden under the shirt.

"NO." he ordered as he grasped my hand from venturing any lower.

"Why not? It's probably what you want isn't it? Why else would you, or _any_ boy for that matter, take any interest in girls?" I spat out vehemently as I jerked my hand away from him.

"That is a _horrible_ thing to say! It is not even true! Some men respect women because they love them. They are not all mindless beings with their interest solely in pleasure!"

"But you DON'T love me." I retorted bluntly.

"Well, you certainly _are_ making it rather difficult if you insist on portraying me like that." He pointed out as he rolled his eyes.

"What _else_ can I expect to think with the way you are touching me?" I nearly growled.

Lee instinctively jerked away from my shoulders, looking almost miffed and pained from what I had said.

"You could have told me to stop holding you the minute you stopped crying." He whispered, holding a slightly offended expression as I got off the bed.

I sighed, repulsed with trying to deal with him. "Just…shut up." I grumbled.

Taking the chair from my desk and placing it in front of my mirror, I sat down to inspect my appearance. My nervous fingers took a comb and unwillingly started to brush my hair in a scornful fashion. It was as though I was taking my frustration out on my poor pink locks. As I sat aimlessly brushing my hair with a total lack of interest plastered on my face, Lee continued to lie on the bed and observe my actions as though they were new to him. His eyes were unnerving, gazing at me like I was some painting that needed to be studied. I couldn't help but smile through my frowning lips when a furtive chuckle erupted from him.

"What's so funny?" I asked, not at all irritated but rather _curious_ from where he could possibly find mirth after this stupid fight.

"Your hair has not grown at all since I left." He answered, propping his torso up with both elbows so he could have a better view of me.

This allowed me yet _another_ mouthwatering view as he held this pose. As if fate was (for once) smiling kindly upon me, a tiny sliver of his shirt ascended and gave me one more glimpse of his flat stomach. I tried not to make my stares so obvious as I stole glances at him through my mirror.

"W-what of it? Mine usually takes a while to grow." I explained, my confidence in my hair suddenly draining.

"No-no, that is not…I did not mean it in a ridiculing manner. I just…I just remembered when I tried to rescue you. I woke up to see you had punched Naruto against a tree when he called me Bushy Brow." He chuckled again at the distant memory of the chunin exams.

The nickname had usually stuck with poor Lee, (considering Naruto often called people by whatever dominant characteristic they had.)

"Pervy Sage, Grandma Tsunade, Bastard, I'd hate to see what he calls _me_!" I joked, reminiscing over my teammate's obnoxious and habitually insulting nicknames.

Lee rose from the bed and decided to lean against my desk. His eyes traveled over to the neatly stocked scrolls he had organized.

"He would not call you any insulting names…he fears you a great a deal to say something so foolish." Lee pointed out as he tapped his fingers against the thin paper of the scrolls. He appeared as though he was about to take his leave.

"So how did things go with Gai Sensei?" I asked, wanting a change of topic to prolong his visit. 

"I did not see him."

The answer was simple and curt, enough to make me realize he didn't want any part of that man's life.

"He almost died you know."

"I do not care."

I stopped in the midst of my brushing to turn around in my chair and gawk at Lee. The brush I had held with my infuriated strength dropped to the floor as I gave him a confounded look. I feared the old Lee had gone away yet _again_, leaving this indifferent and icy bastard behind him.

"Of course you do…he's your Sensei."

"I do not wish to talk about it." Came the incisive remark. 

I bit my lower lip and wondered how he was capable of saying such a thing about the first person who cared for him. It seemed highly unlikely that he had developed a complete aversion for the teacher, but with his unpredictable behavior anything was possible. The man was like family to him-hell-he WAS his father and yet Lee had acted with such indifference that it made me wonder if he wished him _dead_. How even the near demise of someone so precious could bring this change in him baffled me.

"Then I won't force you." I said in surrender.

There was no point rousing his fury.

I sighed and picked up the comb again, starting the monotonous task of brushing my hair. It seemed senseless now since my surprisingly soft hair had long showed no signs of tangles or knots.

It wasn't until a few minutes passed that I heard Lee groan in irritation.

'_He's starting to sound like __**Naruto**__ whenever he's bored._' I cringed remembering my strident teammate.

"What's up with _you_?" I asked, setting the comb back in my drawer.

"Sakura…I want us…"

"What do you want?" I was growing fed up with his hesitant words.

"I want us…I want us to go out and forget about our predicaments…if only for a few hours. But are you going to accompany me or not?" he asked pleadingly as he crossed his arms in vexation.

I shrugged and picked up my face powder to start covering any slight blemishes. "Where do you want to go?"

"We will know when we get there."

"Well _that's_ descriptive." I mocked and patted on some of the powder.

"Would you like to go or _not_?" 

"I'm getting ready aren't I?" came my brusque question as I motioned to the box of makeup in my hand.

"You take far too long for someone so beautiful." Lee said with a smirk.

I had to sigh from the empty flattery as I sat the powder box down and glared at Lee. Apparently, he needed to get out of the house in _great_ urgency from the sulking face he wore. His whole body fidgeted and languidly stretched the moment he knew I had turned my attention to him. Strong and extended arms nearly reached my ceiling as he began to yawn from the tedious time being wasted. The tight shirt he wore (or rather _Tenten's_,shirt since I still SWORE the black apparel belonged in her closet) insinuated his abs as it rose dangerously close to his navel. Biceps bulged from the sleeveless fabric each time he _unintentionally_ flexed them. With one finishing weary moan, he finally let his arms fall adjacently to his now (lamentably) concealed waist. The man was _far_ from chaste if he was learning to manipulate me so soon. I knew that the idiot was simply cajoling me in order to rush out the door, but damn, he had a way of convincing the opposite sex with his charm. 

"Fine…" I grumbled as I managed to dab my lips with gloss, "Let's go already…"

The OLD Lee would have leapt in an array of elation and screams, the OLD Lee would have cried out in tears from being so "wonderfully happy and youthful!" because of his date with me. The OLD Lee probably would had yelled something about "YOUTH!" and skipped all through the village.

The NEW Lee, however, merely gave me a shrewd smile and opened the door for me.

'_Ass_.' 

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

As I had soon found out, my scorn was short lived with Lee. Small gestures of his exceptional manners quickly dispelled the silent exterior I had given him. Simply opening the door for me or holding my hand as I made my way down _any_ case of stairs was enough to convince me he was what my mom often liked to call "a dying race," or in basic terms, a "gentleman." He gave me no signs of wanting to chat as we walked. The top of his hand occasionally brushing against my own brought me shivers aside from those of the bitter weather. It seemed ludicrous how a man could be so oblivious to the feelings he could stir within a girl. We came across a desolate pathway fraught with the bare branches of trees above our heads.

"I used to train in this area…back when I was younger."

The soughing of the bare trees were the only things willing to make a noise between us after his odd statement. It's not that it had not been interesting to say the least; rather, it was just something that had thrown me off guard as he confessed this to me. To me, it wasn't difficult to imagine a beaten young Lee punching and kicking a tree stump until he collapsed from exhaustion only to begin anew when he awoke. The embittered part of me told me he had probably spent more time here than in his own home.

It probably wasn't far from the truth.

"I remember…never wanting to go home…I loved staying here…" It seemed the boy was reading my thoughts.

I nodded my head in understanding, wanting more than anything to grasp that hand that kept brushing against my own.

"I think the first time I ever slept in my bed without fear was the night my father left." He whispered, his distant eyes over the memory of it. "It would be lovely to know if…"

I stopped in my tracks as he paused, looking at his surroundings as though they were new to him.

"What is it?" I encouraged his confession, wanting to know with great effort.

"Now that I ponder about it…I wonder if my mother was as kind as yours."

I gave him a blank look, but found myself rubbing my eyes when I remembered all the times I had taken my mother for granted. True, she was gone half the time along with my father, but they had _never_ been cruel to me. My life was _perfect_ compared to the stringent one Lee must had endured. My hand slipped between his own before my mind was even aware of it. He just chuckled as he glanced at our entwined hands, but continued to walk.

"I'm sure she was kind Lee…I mean you had to get it from _somewhere_ didn't you?" I tried to soothe his troubling thoughts.

"Just like you inherited your beauty and intelligence from your mother?" he asked as he squeezed my hand.

It was _my_ turn to laugh at his joke. "Well…I wouldn't say _intelligence_ but yeah…something like that."

We soon exited the morose forest and found ourselves in the midst of carousal as the sounds of people laughing filled the streets. It was a nice change of scenery. I just wished it didn't smell like something in Tsunade's cabinet.

'_In fact…it kinda smells like a…_'

"A _BAR_? LEE! YOUR idea of a good night is hitting the _BARS_!?" I screamed, my voice nearly drowned from the drunken melees surrounding us.

The boy beside me started to laugh sheepishly and rubbed the back of his head. "Yes, and what is wrong with that?"

"IS THIS YOUR IDEA OF A _JOKE_!? What the _HELL_ happened to the sweet innocent boy who talked to my mom about a '_walk around the village_'!? This is no _walk_!" I hissed breathlessly all whilst putting _extra_ effort in mimicking his quoted voice.

The damn man brought me closer to him with our clasped hands and lowered his head to my level.

"Well, I _think_ someone informed me that you wanted to have a drink of sake ever since you rescued me…so I assumed you would be fine with this." He whispered softly in my ear.

I instantly melted from his sweet tone I had longed to hear, his somewhat sensual voice compelling me to stay. His free hand took hold of my chin and ran a thumb through my bottom lip, making me remember the time he had smothered it in mud in an attempt to give me a fake kiss. My body had a mind of its own as I rose to the tips of my feet and closed my eyes. Despite my determination not to touch him until he recuperated, I felt as though I had no control over what my heart was begging me to do. Love was indeed selfish, impatient, and inconvenient.

Everything _I_ was.

"Lee…don't tease me like that." I ordered dryly when I was ripped out of my thoughts by the absence of his hand against my face.

"Then do not look at me like that." He negotiated his terms playfully as brushed his nose against my own and brought our lips dangerously close.

I wavered at the lack of contact from his lips but opened my eyes and smiled.

"Well…Lady Tsunade _has_ been trying her best to keep the economy of the village up by creating more businesses! The _least_ we can do is assist her." I concurred with a mischievous snicker as I pulled away from Lee.

The man nodded and took my hand in his again before we tried to navigate through the thick crowds of people waiting to get inside different bars.

My joy was soon extinguished when I realized the signs notifying customers the minimum age to enter the festive areas.

'_Crap, I'm screwed.' _

"Lee! We can't go in! What if they _catch_ us or something?" I hissed, clinging on to his arms and trying to pull him back.

He released a surprised yelp as he was cruelly separated from his destination.

"Sakura! What are you doing? _I_ am old enough to enter!" he hissed back as we took several steps away from the buildings, trying in vain to blend in with the obviously more mature crowd.

"No YOU'RE _NOT_!" I replied, _completely_ forgetting he was over a year older than me.

"I am OLDER than you Sakura! All I have to do is convince the man up front to let you in as well!" he explained, bewilderment evident in his eyes from my stupidity.

"But what if he doesn't _let_ you!? I don't want to be left out here all _alone_!" I whined like a child at the thought of being mugged even though I could probably smash their skulls.

Lee's eyes seemed to light up with an idea as he released my hand and reached into his back pocket for his wallet.

"I am NOT going to go away with money." I said disgustedly.

He rolled his eyes and handed me a tiny plastic card. "I almost forgot I had this."

"What is…?" I nearly laughed when I realized Tenten's picture was on the identification card. "You're not suggesting I use HER identification card by any chance are you?"

"_No_, I am suggesting you return it right now to her house." He answered sarcastically as he slapped his hand over his forehead. "Sakura, no one will notice…just say you dye your hair regularly, I do not think they will even _care_!"

I stared blankly at him and wondered where he had gotten such a stupid idea.

"_Wait_, you've been planning this from the _start_ haven't you!?" I accused as I cupped my mouth with laughter while picturing Lee beg Tenten for her ID in the hospital. She had probably asked for something in return for such a generous favor.

'_Probably a naked picture of Neji or something…_' I derided, knowing well she detested him as a possible date.

"Okay! So, what bar do you want to hit first?" I asked, my curiosity piqued from wanting to know where his choice of social outings were.

Lee lifted a finger to his lip in quick contemplation, looking more like a child in a concession stand trying to decide what flavor soda to have. His eyes scanned the various places until they finally rested on something that surprised me. He pointed a finger at an urbane looking lounge that was somewhat filled with people. The prices from the window were enough to tell me why only a select number of customers were there.

"Lee…that place looks really expensive…" I began reluctantly when I noticed the ridiculous amount of money for a drink.

"I do not care...I want to take you there." He answered, stubborn as ever while he dragged me through the street despite my objections.

"I swear Lee, if you end up broke because I end up drinking _half_ the crap in there I'm not going to-OH HI!" I was interrupted by the intimidating beefy man guarding the entrance.

With a persuasive shove from Lee, I shakily took two steps toward the man and wondered how I would convince him.

"ID please." He asked calmly, completely blocking the door from my view.

A bead of sweat rolled down the side of my face as I nervously took out the card and presented it to the man.

"So this is you huh?" he asked dryly.

I nodded, trying to look anywhere _but_ his face. "Yeah, I uh…dye my hair a lot."

"You should dye it back…I don't know _what_ you were thinking when you dyed it pink."

I clenched my knuckles, ready to punch his teeth out and strangle him with his intestines. A soft rubbing against my arms from Lee was all it took to calm me down.

"What about the eyes?"

"Oh _those_ were contacts…I don't like my green eyes so I ALWAYS change them.."

He nodded approvingly. "Yeah, green _really_ doesn't flatter you."

"DO YOU JUST WANT ME TO KICK YOUR A-!"

Lee clamped his hand over my mouth and smiled at the man.

"Trust me…she has this _thing_ with her appearance…she just adores to change it all the time." He muttered as he wrapped his free arm around my waist.

"Uh-…huh."

The guard looked askance at me once more, studying my every movement lest the slightest twitch divulged my age. I allowed my eyes to scan around the floor and Lee, hoping to the heavens that this jackass would buy into my desultory lies. The menacing man's burly fingers wrapped around the ID, practically toying with it the way he was simply toying with me. I clenched my teeth, ready to defend the fact that the girl on the picture was in fact _me_. This man must have had a death wish by the way he kept lifting his eyebrow at me in skepticism. I swore I could've heard Lee whimper when my nails dug into the arm around my waist. He made a wise choice when he finally uncovered my mouth.. 

"_What_?! Can't a girl dye her hair without being judged every time she goes somewhere?!" I nearly growled, my sanity snapping in two as I was freed from Lee's hand.

The man chortled and handed me back _my_ ID. "I suppose not…all right, in you go."

With the divine approval of the brawny man, he took a step away from the door and motioned for us to enter.

"Come on Lee." I ordered as I jerked his arm and dragged him inside the lounge.

The crisis had been averted.

And the jackass had _narrowly_ escaped a few broken ribs.

I tried not to sneeze from the light scent of cigarette smoke sauntering like a mist around us. Pounding music could be heard in the far corner of the room as I we made our way across mobs of people with drinks clenched in their hands. The drinks, all motley of vibrant colors and sizes, were held high above their heads in protection lest someone knocked into them. The bar was replete of men and women crowding around the poor bartender and screaming out orders that could hardly be distinguishable through the deafening music. Miraculously, the young man appeared to clearly hear them and prepared the strange drinks with a facile style.

"I want _that_ one!" I cried out like a child as I pointed to a certain drink the bartender created and handed to a girl. Lee merely saw a glimpse of the artistic drink since she either guzzled it down in a matter of seconds or disappeared between the thick crowds of people still waiting for their turn. Neon green liquid embellished with lemon wedges disappeared between the music and people, not allowing Lee to clearly see what I had wanted.

Lithe arms wrapped themselves around my body as Lee pressed himself against my back.

"We should find a table first…I do not want to lose you!" his yelling seemed like a mere _murmur_ in the midst of the sound.

I gulped as blood gushed under my cheeks. His seemingly romantic words were nothing but simple advice on how to navigate through this sea of people. I _knew_ that he had only meant it to keep an eye on me...but…why couldn't his words have the meaning I _wanted_?

There was no time to contemplate on my question as Lee lead me through a small flight of stairs.

"I do not wish for you to _wait_ for your drinks!" He explained loudly as he pulled me up to the second floor of the lounge.

The people underneath us appeared to be like a mob of the undead scavenging to quench their thirst. It appeared like they wanted to _devour_ the bartender from the way their arms reached out to him and tried to captivate him. The almost frenetic sight tore me away from Lee's words as he pulled me down on a cushioned seat. I didn't even realize he had sat next to me until a busty young lady in a scanty dress offered me a slip of paper.

"Hello! And what would you two like to drink this evening?!" she asked kindly as she leaned in front of us (giving both of us a rather _generous_ look down her dress.)

For once I was grateful Lee was so proper around women considering I would have _killed_ him had he even _glanced_ at the ample cleavage. He instinctively burrowed his face in what appeared to be a menu, clearing his throat continuously. I tried not to laugh over the shocked and traumatized face he held. I accepted my menu from the woman but swore my eyes were bulging out when I read it. A near endless selection of beverages was printed before me as I studied the different names of the drinks, trying to decipher the unusual and unfamiliar words with what dearth knowledge I had of alcohol.

Lee nudged my shoulder, but I tried to slap it away since my attention was focused solely on the names before me.

"SAKURA!" his voice was finally on equal grounds with all the other roaring noises.

"_WHAT_!?" I screamed back, my voice all but hoarse from the music and talking amongst people.

His mouth appeared to be moving, but no words were heard with the thunderous beats of music that were one with my frantic heart. He rolled his eyes and offered me his hand to rise from our seats. I hastily accepted and left the menu on the tiny table, wondering where he could possibly take me. Words which were once soundlessly leaving him finally seemed like a whisper as the waitress led us inside a small room at the end of the hall. Music could still be heard, albeit in muffled palpitations through the thick walls that surrounded us. A traditional table was placed in front of us as Lee sat me down on a cushion on the floor. The room seemed rather secluded and silent compared to the frenzy from downstairs, finally making me relax. It had taken me several minutes to realize this was the kind of room one needed to make reservations for or be loaded in money to afford.

Before I could even make any objections to leave, Lee cupped the side of my face and leaned his lips against my ear.

"I asked you if you would like to share a bottle of sake with me?" he whispered.

I nodded as I melted to his touch, pretending to _casually_ brush my cheek against his lips.

Startled, Lee pulled away and returned to the attractive waitress patiently waiting for our response. She smiled pleasantly at us as Lee asked about the chosen drink. With a short nod, she promptly left the room and closed the curtained doors behind her.

"Lee…we don't have to be here…we could've just stayed downstairs." I urged him to reconsider since I was sure he would need his life savings just to pay for the room.

"I will not have you waiting like that." He answered as he took a seat across from me.

I gave him a puzzled look when I inspected our distance. "Okay…but do you have to sit so far away from me? It's not like my mom's here." I joked remembering his ridiculous poise around my mother.

"I thought you did not like me near you."

"Only when I don't need your sympathy." I retorted as I threw my cushion to his end of the table and sat next to him.

Lee sighed and rubbed the back of his neck. "Sakura…honestly…you riddle me to no end."

"Uh-huh," I began with mild interest, "so why'd you pick this place? Out of all the cool sleazy bars I wanted to see, why'd you pick this sophisticated lounge for us?"

He scooted closer to me, getting comfortable with my choice of topic. "Unlike other places, they offer a variety of alcohol whether it is mixed drinks, sake, or beer." He explained.

"OH!…Have you been here before then?"

"Once…with Neji."

I had to blink several times in confusion to comprehend his odd answer. The tips of my lips curled into a slightly amused smile as I began to laugh. Neji didn't strike me as the type of person to have a liking to social outings-_hell_-he was never SOCIAL to begin with. If anything, his idea of a fun Saturday night would probably be contemplating on how to change his destiny or meditating or…something. How Lee had somehow managed to coerce him to go _anywhere_ with him, much less a _club_, was something worthy of blackmail in the near future.

"If YOU were the one who dragged him here then I have newfound respect for you Lee!" I exclaimed as I playfully punched his shoulder.

My "playful" punch nearly knocked him off balance as he struggled to regain composure by slamming his body on the table.

"Sorry!" I said sweetly, cupping my mouth and trying not to giggle at his adorably infuriated face.

Before Lee could insult my brute strength, the curtains rolled open to reveal the waitress holding a tray in her hand. It was just as well, I didn't feel like fighting with him over something stupid again.

"Here you are! Please enjoy and let me know if there is _anything_ I can do." She said sweetly before setting two large bottles of sake and two cups in front of us. She then proceeded to practically _strut_ out through the curtains.

'_Wish I had __**her**__ confidence…not to mention her perfectly huge round breas-'_

"Sakura, get your mind out of there." Lee's advice ripped me from my thoughts as I looked piteously down my own chest.

"What? I'm _comparing_!" I whined sensually, automatically earning a brightly colored face from the boy.

He quickly slapped his own hand across his forehead and dragged it down his face in frustration. (It seemed to be a habit for him now.)

"Sakura…you are…the _oddest_ girl."

"That's rich coming from the most eccentric man in the village."

"Let us just-agh…Sakura, just take your drink." He pleaded and he handed me a tiny cup I had so often seen in Tsunade's office.

I said nothing and smiled as I accepted the small thing that was filled to the brim with the heavenly liquid. It would be _quite_ some time before Tsunade would actually let me drink anything besides water, so I figured I'd enjoy it now. I could only stare in awe at the potable beverage before it met my mouth.

"Oh!" I exclaimed in surprise when the acrid drop made contact with my lips for the first time. The zest of the alcohol tickled my nose as I relished the drink. It had an almost acerbic quality that puckered my lips as it passed rather sweetly down my throat. I sighed in contentment as the sake quickly warmed my body. I swallowed my first sip and closed my eyes in bliss.

"Do you like it?"

"I LOVE IT!"

I continued to sip at the pungent liquid and instinctively took hold of his hand as though it was something natural we always did. I smiled again and gave it a tight squeeze.

"So how'd you bribe Neji to come here with you?" I asked, my curiosity growing over his methods.

Lee stared at my fingers enlaced in his own, but said nothing of the contact. "It was during…the first time I lived with him in the Hyuga Household." he responded and downed his first cup of the transparent euphoria, completely ignoring the fact that he returned my squeeze.

The drink regurgitated within my throat, forcing me to hack out the precious liquid as I heard this.

"Neji took _YOU_!?" I practically exploded in bewilderment, my drink scattering across the floor in coughs as I slammed the cup on the table.

"He…_proposed_ the idea, yes." He remarked pensively as he calmly lifted the bottle and filled my cup again. He continued to drink in front of me as though I wasn't hacking up a _lung_. He gently patted my back, soothing my smoldering throat and my mind.

"Wh-when was _this_?" I rasped. It seemed the Hyuga wasn't such an antisocial hardass after all. "Wh-when did you _LIVE_ with him?"

Lee's attention immediately went to the short table as he bit his lower lip in what I could assume was contemplation and lament. Distrait eyes staring at the drink in front of them accentuated that the topic was still sensitive to him.

"Back when my father finally left."

"Oh." I said curtly, stopping before guzzling down my second cup. I had probably been callous to simply respond with a single word, but I dared not trod into untouched territory with Lee. If Lee had even gotten _over_ his mission was anonymity to me. I quietly drank, trying to wash down the sudden disgust I felt toward the man who had hurt him.

"I'm…sorry. I really shouldn't have-"

"It is all right…it is actually a bit…_relieving_ to finally be able to say this." Lee flashed me a smile and downed his third cup.

My returning smile disappeared as I tried to pull the tiny dish away from him before he completely finished it. "Whoa, Lee…I know your medical history…you sure you should be drinking that fast?" Worry was evident in my tone when I placed the drink on my side of the table.

"I am no longer that weak little ninja you knew…" he mumbled as he took his cup back in offense.

"Yes, but I don't want you getting hurt." I warned, stretching my hand toward him and trying to take the cup away once more.

Lee easily avoided my intrusion by taking my hand and kissing it. I blinked my eyes repeatedly as I absorbed what his lips had done. For a moment I thought it to be a mere random maudlin act. He smiled and released my hand before I even had time to ask why he had done such a thing.

"I grew a…'tolerance' quite some time ago…" he said as he took another sip from his cup, completely unaffected by the drink.

"Well, _that_ can't be good if you did." I said stupidly while staring down at my hand in utter chagrin.

"Hm."

My eyes widened in fear over what he had implied.

I mentally swore to kill his father and beat Lee within an inch of his life if his problems were the cause of the drug abuse. It seemed Lee was _waiting_ for me to speak judging from my expression.

"_Say it_." He offered dryly.

"You didn't…you weren't drinking because of your…_problems_…right?" I asked cautiously lest the thought of the subject disturbed him.

Lee shook his head and gave off a light chuckle. "No…I suppose that is just what happens when you try to train with the drunken fist. I just ended up drinking more to get the same effect. It was pointless really."

"Oh." I replied and reverted to the drink in front of me. Beads of sake that had escaped the brims of my cup rolled down to the table and created a tiny ring of liquid. I found myself intently staring at it with the utmost interest. "So uh…why exactly did you end up living with Neji for a while?" I asked, my curiosity perking past it secure limit.

"They were concerned about the _possibility_ of my father coming back to kill me." He explained as though it had been a simple statement of how his _day_ had been.

"_They_?" I asked curiously as I lifted the bottle and served him another cup.

"Gai and Neji." He answered sharply, wasting no time in attaching honorifics to the man he had once venerated, copied, and worshipped. Had he really meant so much to him after all?

I didn't think so anymore.

A lamp clinked noisily as he set his third empty cup on the table with a loud smack. I had barely finished my second cup and I was already serving him his _fourth_. Indeed the years of nonage had completely dissipated away and left me this mature young man. He was already guzzling down the stuff like it was _water_. I had no intention of getting drunk in front of the man I admired most, but it was unnerving knowing that my limits were probably nothing compared to his. I just gazed at him as I carefully swallowed all the liquid in the cup and relished its caustic yet delightful taste. It had a distinct texture to it as it traveled down my throat, practically scorching my esophagus from the bitter alcohol.

"I suppose Neji took me here as a failed attempt to cheer me up." He said suddenly, broaching what appeared to be a new topic. A smile tugged at his lips and made me want to join him in this new subject.

"Did it work?"

"Like hell. We could not get up the next morning."

"Ah."

I made a mental note to bring this up with Neji if the need for blackmail ever rose between us. A vile smirk graced my features before I hid it behind the tip of my cup. If the image of a drunken Lee and Neji carousing through the village did not make me laugh, then the thought of their _hangover_ more than did the job. The drink bubbled in my mouth as I tried to swallow it between my chortles. A few giggles that escaped were soon stifled when I met Lee's earnest eyes. He seemed to be foreboding me with a sound warning.

"Do NOT bring this up with Neji." He demanded with a protruding lower lip.

"I-I won't." I lied, disporting at the sight of his endearing expression.

He gave me a reluctant look, but said nothing.

"Well…" I began looking at my empty cup with a dolorous face before Lee filled it. "This sure is weird."

"What is?" he asked with inordinate alarm.

"I just…I just think it's weird that you would even _propose_ this." I muttered as I slid my finger around the edge of my drink.

"Well…I wanted to go somewhere that we would both enjoy…" he explained as though it were obvious while he set the bottle down and rested his elbows on the table.

"Yes, but you could've easily chosen the park, the movies, a resta-"

"Both you and I are aware of how uncomfortable _that_ would be." He remarked deprecatingly.

I rolled my eyes even though he had a point. (There would be no way to fathom how awkward each scenario would be.)

"Do you regret it?" he asked.

"Regret what?"

"You. Me. _This_. Coming here." He stated with an unfamiliar and perturbed tone to his voice.

"I…well…" I mumbled, wondering why his head was slowly oscillating as though he were nodding, "Not really…I just didn't expect this from you, but it's…fun!" I confessed with a grin. 

"Because if you _do_ regret it, I will certainly give your mother my apologies for bringing you to a place you did not wish to see. We can tell her we drank respons-"

"NO-NO! THAT'S FINE!" I exclaimed, waving my hands in front of his face so as to silence him.

My mother might have been open minded and indulging, but that in no way meant I knew to what extent her limits were placed on underage drinking. Knowing her boisterous nature, the woman was likely to scream to my dad about how her underage daughter had gotten her first hangover. I shuddered at the endless possibilities for reactions and downed the rest of the cup.

"Y-you're so…bad Lee." I mumbled slowly as served him the last precious drops of sake from the bottle.

I quirked an eyebrow at the now empty bottle and wondered how two people could have finished it. It seemed my counting ability had been severely hindered.

"We…have just…finished…that." Lee pointed out the obvious as his head continued to sway from one direction to the next.

"Yeah." I agreed, lowering my head and trying to get a look at his face to see if he was already drunk.

"Would you…like more?" he asked, motioning to the remaining bottle as his bangs nearly covered most of his face. "I thought you would like more."

I stared at him in ennui all while sucking on a piece of ice I had gotten from a small dish. (Apparently, the waitress had left it there as well for some reason.) I couldn't even FEEL the coolness of the cube on my tongue since it had long grown numb with the effects that were slowly taking place. My eyes seemed to be erratically focusing on many things at once, the cup on the table, the remaining booze, Lee's lips, his arms, his chest, his quirked eyebrows as he noticed I was staring at him. The smile I gave him nearly made all the blood in my body turn to a simmer. The euphoric sensation was eventually doused as I saw his jaw drop in shock.

"Wh...wha-..." I tried to ask him what his problem was but my mouth felt as though it had been anesthetized.

"What did you say?" he asked, astonishment clearly evident in his features.

"Huh?" I mumbled as I popped the ice cube in my mouth and tastelessly began to munch on it.

"You just said something..." before he dared to continue, he thought it best to automatically shut his mouth and turn his gaze away from me.

It seemed that I hadn't even been AWARE that I had let some once deeply hidden unconscious thought slip through my lips.

I would have blushed, but the lovely drink was already doing that to my complexion.

"Wh...what d...did I...say?" I managed to slur out as I quaffed the drink and signaled Lee to serve me another.

(Knowing me, the remark was probably something obscene.)

Lee opened his mouth again, looking as though he was prepared to tell me, and promptly shut it again when his carmine face returned. I tried to talk, but settled for giving him an avid look expecting him to speak. The smile I once had plastered on my face had returned and was slowly stretching as I imbibed more from the cup.

"Y-you already _know_ what you said! Why…are you…making me repeat it?" he asked as he moved away from me as though I was going to GROPE him. He was obviously abashed from whatever unknown thoughts I had voiced. 

"I..." I was trying my best not to laugh at his behavior, "I-I seriously…d-don't know what I said."

"How can you not!? You just said you would-!…" his crimson face turning away from me again allowed him no time to finish.

"W-would…wh…what? Huh?" I teased, feeling as though the tip of my tongue was glued to my two front teeth.

At this point, I was convinced my inward confessions had been the drink's doing and not my own. Oddly enough, I could not garner enough decency to even _apologize_ to him.

"You said that…I looked like a good…"

"What?" I asked, daring him to finish.

"_Screw_." He finally mumbled almost inaudibly as he rubbed his florid cheeks.

"_And_?" I asked as though it was something I mentioned everyday. "Well you _do_."

"_SAKURA_!" he exclaimed as the color of his face intensified. "Why must you say these…these _things_!? Does it not _bother_ you?" he deprecated me in vain as he tried to hide his face in his hands.

"Nope." I replied sheepishly. "Why _should_ they bother me? It's the truth isn't it?"

My mouth was all too willing to purge any other covert thoughts I had of him. (My mind said otherwise but was currently too occupied in keeping me balanced.)

"Sakura…you are…an impossible woman…" he slurred as he threw his head back and swallowed every last drop in his cup with gusto. "I think that is why I was always pining for you…I loved accomplishing unattainable goals."

"Is that all I was to you then?" I said in amused bewilderment, "A _goal_?"

"No…in fact right now I wish…" he thought for a moment as his eyes squinted and tried to scrutinize my face.

"What do you wish?" I joined in as I found my cup empty of its delicious contents for the umpteenth time.

"I wish for us to pretend to be…lovers…if only for tonight!" he professed rather loudly before running his fingers through my hair.

Through the sensory deprivation I could still muster a blush from his contact.

"I want to be able to hold your hand as though nothing was wrong with me! I wish to be able to kiss you without fearing what the consequences will be! I wish…I wish…" Lee seemed to grumble some other incoherent entreating before I poured him another cup to silence him. He guzzled down the rest of his drink and rested his head on the table.

"L…Lee…y-you're…you're drunk." I scolded, feeling a tinge of hypocrisy as I said it.

"_That_…my lovely Sakura…is a safe assumption." He lifted his index finger up at the ceiling and concurred with an almost comical poised tone. His voice was muffled by the table, but his words could still be heard.

"I wish to…leave my dear Sakura…" he murmured with a choked laugh. "I wish to walk…with you."

I had to giggle at the boy's staid composure even during these circumstances. Somehow, Lee would always be Lee in some areas. It had seemed that with the alcohol, his once abstemious attitude had disappeared, only a laughing carefree boy remained. I attempted to stand, but came crashing back down on the cushion with my weakened legs.

The idiot started to laugh even harder.

"Quiet Lee!" I barked drunkenly, "Help me get up!"

As if threatened with certain demise, Lee shot up from his seat and obediently pulled me toward him for support. My head and chest seemed to be throbbing with gushes of warmth as Lee entwined his hand in mine and led me downstairs.

"Stay close to me." He pleaded before his voice was drowned in the pounding beats of music and blinding lights.

It was almost exhausting having to wring myself away from strangers' hands as they called to me and regaled me with promises of lovely liquor. (It seemed my pink hair was an immediate attention grabber.) The drink, no matter how cogent, would never take precedence over Lee. To say that I was flattered was a joke from their revolting attempts to captivate me. If anything, I was repulsed by the alien hands randomly caressing my own, people shoving against my skin, pulling their limbs away from the inebriated frisson, my own perspiration mingling with their own and nearly suffocating me. Lee gave them vicious looks threatening to break bones as he jerked me closer to him. It almost made me muse about the possibility of him being invidious.

After what seemed like an eternity, we finally escaped the crowded bar and met our freedom in the form of a freezing gust of wind outside the doors. The chilly and hostile air nearly knocked all the intoxication out of me, shocking all my senses out of their altered state and plunging them into capricious disarray. I blinked my bewildered eyes and tried to transfer the fact that Lee was still holding on to my hand.

"Where would you like to go?"

The question was straightforward, _simple_…and yet I was too stupefied by the sheer shock of the weather to answer him. My ears, still ringing from the deafening music booming through the building, tried in vain to get acclimated to the hushed tranquility of the night. Any form of speech was quickly mired by my stunned tongue.

"Come."

He had answered for me it seemed.

Hooking his arm around my own, we tried to stroll about without creating a zigzag line with our steps. We kept to ourselves, giggling slightly only when our feet crashed against one another. The air was thick with frivolity and revelry as we walked by the last of the bars. Fellow ninja and citizens could be seen laughing through windows, downing their fair share of drink all while being oblivious to the consequences the morning would bring. The muddled sounds eventually faded and gave way to the chirping of crickets and occasional whispering between lovers as we passed them.

I tried not to become jealous.

"How…how long have we been walking?" he asked slowly as we finally stopped on a patch of grass by a sylvan playground.

"I don't know." I replied honestly as I rubbed my trembling shoulders. (As far as I was concerned, we had been maundering about like a couple of adolescent drunks since what seemed like _hours_ to me.)

"Are you cold?"

"I don't know." I replied again, wondering if the cause of my incessant trembling was the frosty air or Lee's fixating stare.

We were finally alone, alone in a seemingly vast forest of trees that surrounded us.

"Would you like for me to escort you home?" he offered, his chivalry as always having no limits.

I shook my head (which seemed to be spinning at the moment.)

"Then damn the cold!" he said with a laugh as he lost his balance and landed with his back against the grass.

I had to chuckle at his odd behavior and bibulous remarks. Even while inebriated beyond his mind, the man was starting to resemble someone I had lost.

"Damn the fall!" I chimed as I landed on the grass next to him. "Damn it all Lee! Just damn it all!"

"Sakura…you…my lovely friend…are DRUNK…"

"I'm not frecking drunk…y-you are…w-where are we going again?" I asked, the tip of my insensate tongue once again sticking to the roof of my mouth whenever I tried to talk.

"I…I suppose this is…" Lee closed his eyes in _seemingly_ deep thought and lifted a finger to point at the sky, "the..ugh…way to your…_house_?"

"Yeah…I think you're right." I slurred as I clung on to Lee's shirt to rise lest I tripped over air. It seemed not even his expeditious speed could spare us from what happened next.

My vertiginous state did nothing to assist my balance. In the midst of the drunken frenzy, my caution failed miserably as my whole body collapsed on top of him and left us in a…very _compromising_ position. If the blood from my body had not already flushed to my face because of my deeply altered state, then this surely did the trick. His heartbeats hastened as I rested my head against his chest. I would kill if I knew my whole body was collapsed on top of him and I hadn't taken advantage of it. I giggled nervously as though it was the most humorous thing I had ever done. _Everything_ seemed to have some hilarity to it now that I thought about it. Lee's chuckles were soon concurrent with my own as we burst into a fit of pointless laughter.

"This is so stupid! I-I…I ca-can't believe wh-what a klutz I-I am!" I tried to speak between gasps of air from my giggles.

"It is quite all right Sakura." Lee said breathlessly seeing as how my whole weight was being supported by him. .

I rolled off his body, finally realizing the discomfort our positions was causing him, and lied sprawled on the luscious damp grass. The stars were scant and bleak as I tried to study them to no avail. They were shrouded in looming clouds foreboding rain in the morning.

"It's…going to rain…Lee."

"Y-yes…yes it will."

I sighed happily as I gave off one last remaining chuckle and continued to look at the dreary sky.

"S-…Sakura…can I…will you allow me to confess something to you?" he asked, his voice sounding as though it were a grave matter.

I shrugged, too preoccupied with finding ways to make the ground stop moving around me.

"I am…very glad you accepted my invitation."

"Well, I…am gl…ad you came to see me." I responded dozily.

"May I…please tell you something else?" he asked as he turned his head toward me.

I laughed again and wondered how Lee could still keep his poise and dignity even while under the influence of what I could only assume were various cups of alcohol. His eyes were half closed, attempting to focus solely on me but failing dejectedly. He tucked his lower lip inside his mouth as he contemplated his words. The gesture nearly drove me insane while I tried to ignore his now opening mouth.

"Sakura…when I…when I first met you, you were the most…_beautiful_ girl I had ever seen…"

"Lee…you're drunker than I am…" I grumbled, feeling like my tongue was getting stuck on a frozen pole.

"I am serious! I wanted to be your _boyfriend_! I w-wanted to…to _MARRY_ you!"

"Whoa Lee…quiet..I-I thon't…I thon't want you saying thomething you'll regret.." my intoxicated warnings were in vain.

"I know that I tease you…a great deal but…I feel SO flattered when you look at me with that face…"

"What are you _thalking_ about?" I asked, my mind was sobering up faster than _his_ was apparently.

"Such as…when I lifted up my shirt today…I was SO flattered I could _DIE_!" he exclaimed, placing great emphasis on the 'die.'

"Yeah…that's nice." I grumbled as looked up at the stars, wondering why I kept falling off the _ground_.

"You do not believe me…do you?" he asked accusingly as he propped his head up with his elbow.

I was currently far too busy in keeping my balance to deal with his seemingly trivial confessions.

"Sakura! How can you not…believe what I can honestly say is the truth!?" he continued to whine with a slurring tone when he noticed I was ignoring him.

Although his beguiling remarks were making me want to silence him with my lips with each growing second, I knew better than to believe a drunk. (Being in Tsunade's presence while she was in a similar state of mind was enough to tell me _that_.)

M-hm." I concurred absentmindedly merely to silence him.

"SAKURA!" he yelled, apparently not pleased with his lack of attention.

"_What_?" I asked languidly.

"Why do you not say anything in return!?" he carped like an incessant child as he rose his upper body from the grass and sat down.

"Do you not believe me?" he belabored the question that made me want to roll my eyes.

"No." I answered blatantly.

"Why?"

"Because...you're too…" I had to bite my own sedated tongue as I wondered how I could _possibly_ explain my reasoning to Lee. "You're too …_conservative_…to ever say those things."

"I am NOT!" he exclaimed.

"Yes you are, I was surprised you didn't freak out when I grabbed your hand!" I recriminated. (This zealot of manners and modesty was not about to prove me otherwise.)

"I do not mind physical contact!" he tried to convince me fervently. As if to desperately prove his point, he grabbed my hand and stared contemplatively at it.

"What are you going to do with it?" I asked with complete tedium.

The boy was obviously not giving me the slightest implication of what his actions were, but there was a roguish look upon his face that made my brow crease in worry.

He merely gave me a smirk before he shoved my hand up his shirt.

'_Holy…_' I swore I felt something that resembled a washboard under there.

My febrile face resembled a lighted coal at this point.

"Th-th…that's uh…uh…" I muttered foolishly as I fondled what I thought were warm _rocks_ underneath the tight shirt, "th-that's…nice."

_'HOLY_...' was my mind's current mantra as I tried to administer this act.

My eyes looked away from Lee, too filled with disconcertment over my jejune reaction.

"You can touch me anytime you please…" he mumbled as he leaned against me and brushed his lips against my nose.

"You sure you're just not saying that because you're drunk?" I asked nervously, momentarily taking my attention off the rippling muscles bestowed upon me.

"No…"

"All right…I'm going to hold you to that." I muttered, my reluctance lingering despite Lee's efforts to persuade me.

"M-hm."

Pressing my luck, my hand slowly traveled further up the shirt to his torso. I nearly shuddered in a mixture of incredulity and desire as I felt his built pectorals. Something within me throbbed with an overwhelming covet to see what the rest of his body was like. The bottom part of his stomach (the one I had so gradually exposed as my hand lifted it) shivered from the harsh wind of fall. I attempted to stop, to retrieve my hand and admonish myself for causing such reactions from him, but found the urge to continue far too irresistible to ignore as Lee steadied my hand inside his shirt with his own before I could take it out. The man was gorgeous to me, it didn't matter what other girls would think of it. It didn't matter to me that he didn't have his own claque stalking him like other boys. To me, his body was the epitome of ideal masculinity, it was a physique that only someone specializing in taijutsu and arduous work could produce. I would kill anyone who said otherwise.

I tried to hide my lascivious stare as Lee continued to shove my hand up his shirt. It was not as though I was ENJOYING it. No…of course not, that wasn't it.

No…that wasn't it at all.

My face begged to differ.

"You have…a really…nice body Lee."

Lee could only scoff and smile in return. "It is only good for fighting…and not much of that."

A vein at the edge of my temple nearly wanted to burst from his words.

"Again with this? Lee, how many times are you going to degrade yourself in front of me? You should be proud of your body! It's far more than any tool or waste of space! Y-you…you _matter_ Lee!"

"M-hm…" he mumbled with mild interest at my acknowledgement.

He seemed to be more interested in my hand as it continued to rest in the middle of his firm chest.

"Would you like to know something?" he asked, his eyes never leaving my concealed hand under the fabric.

I playfully trailed two fingers up and down his sternum, all while enjoying the small trembles that rose from Lee. "What is it?"

"I thought you would be repulsed by me the moment you even felt my skin."

"What?" I asked, dumbfounded by his odd assumption. "N-no, I…I'm not repulsed. On the contrary really."

"Y-you mean…you are not disgusted…by what I just _did_?" he asked, his stupor obviously dissipated.

"No…I'm actually kind of flattered to tell you the truth." I replied as I continued to gently brush my index finger and thumb across his covered chest.

Lee burrowed his eyebrows in surprise, apparently not expecting my response.

"Flattered? Whatever is the reason for that?" he asked as he idly played with a lock of my hair.

All he received in response was a shrug of my shoulder.

My attraction towards him at this point was more than some carnal meretricious urge to simply ravage him. I wanted to embrace him, to whisper loving words in his ear, to kiss his lips whenever he smiled, to be the one he confided in, to be…to be _his_. My incarnadine right cheek met his left as I softly rubbed against him, adoring the soft texture of his face. He let go of my hand currently engaged inside his shirt and slowly brought it up to caress my back. It ran in soothing waves across my shoulders and stopped dangerously close to my lumbar region. A chuckle quickly interrupted the lax moment.

"What is it?" I asked against his ear in what I thought was my sensual voice.

"Nothing…" he replied with another chuckle, "I have just…I had a dream once…just like this one. It occurred to me in the last night of the chunin exam."

"Oh?" I asked with a flattered laugh. "Were you drunk in the dream as well?" I teased.

Lee shot me a puzzled look and shook his head. "No…we were just…I was holding you just like I am doing now."

"Ah." I mumbled as I leaned against him and took my hand away from his stomach. The soporific drink was already beginning to possess my mind, coercing me to sleep in the first place I landed.

"Sakura. Sakura, we cannot sleep here, I have to take you home." He whispered when he realized I was slumping over his chest.

"Sure we can…it's not like someone's going to mug us or something." I grumbled lazily and I swatted my hand around to silence him.

I had to roll my eyes and growl in irritation as I felt his body shift under me. His arm wrapped around my waist before he lifted me to my feet with none of my participation. It took me several moments to realize we started to walk. (It was more like _stumbling_ since neither of us could control our motor skills very well.) In my stupor, even time seemed sluggish since I felt my feet touch concrete in a matter of minutes. The pavement informed me that we were already in my neighborhood. My heavy eyelids drooped as I held on to Lee's hand for dear life lest I collapsed on the street. We were already a street across from my house yet I wished we were miles away from it. I didn't want the man beside me to leave, not when we had made so much progress, not when I was terrified of waking up and realizing it had all been a dream.

"Sakura, will you work tomorrow?" Lee asked worriedly as I searched my pockets for my house keys.

Palaver and hums were all that was left between us as Lee continued to support my indolent body. My top lip often bumping against his jaw was enough to convince me the act of him helping me walk wasn't even humiliating anymore. At this point, the transient effects of alcohol were just pitiful ways to excuse my ridiculous proximity to Lee's body.

"Hell no." I replied tersely while trying to shove the keys into the lock.

He chuckled and steadied my hand, helping me turn the lock off and opening the door.

"I hoped you would not…there is no telling how you will wake up tomorrow."

"I'll wake up _fine_." I grumbled angrily. "I'm not one of those stupid girls who wake up with a hangover and then need help pulling her hair back while she pukes."

"Something tells me you have thought about this before." Lee remarked teasingly as he walked through the darkness of my house trying to find the light switch.

I held back laughter when I hear a loud banging noise and a muffled curse word. It was a maze even if one used the utmost care to navigate around my living room's furniture.

"Some ninja _you_ are." I jeered with a smile before a jolt of pain rushing through my knee silenced me.

'_Damn couch._'

In my fit of scorn for the furniture, I sent it flying at least three feet with one of my kicks.

It was Lee's turn to laugh.

My pupils dilated in alarm as the bleak darkness spontaneously gave way to light with the flick of a switch. I rubbed my eyes, loathing to get acclimated to the harsh luminosity.

"God I hate you…" I uttered as I made my way to my kitchen.

"Where are you going?" I heard Lee call out.

"Where do you _think_? I'm going to feed my face." I answered groggily. The rumbling in my stomach angrily informed me that I had not given it nourishment for a prolonged period of time.

'_I think that booze was my __**breakfast**_.'

I decided to make a note not to tell Lee.

"Why did you not tell me sooner?" Lee's head popped into the room before he walked towards me. "We could have eaten somewhere if you liked."

I shook my head and opened my food cabinet, blindly grabbing the first thing my hand touched.

'_Oh joy,_ _ramen_.'

I took the last two remaining styrofoam cups out and tossed one to Lee.

"Here. You'll eat one with me right?" I asked as I took out a pitcher of water and filled both to the brim.

Lee stared blankly at the cup and then at me, probably wondering why we were eating ramen so late at night.

His crapulous stiff figure and pale face did little to help me believe he was fine to walk home. He had an aura about him, one of complete equanimity that was pressed to the point of alarm as he took a few slow steps toward my microwave.

"You're going to sleep over aren't you?" I asked casually as though I were asking Ino or Tenten.

"_What_?" Lee looked at me with an incredulous face, one that was ready to leave my house. His eyes were wide with a mélange of shock and discomfort.

"Well yeah…I mean, you look like you can hardly walk." I pointed out, my caesura in my words filled with worry.

"Why…why would you even _want_ that?" he asked, a tinge of disgust evident in his face as it formed into a grimace.

"I don't know…" I replied honestly while studying the cups revolving in the microwave. "I suppose I-"

"What…_possible_ reason can you have for me to sleep here? It is not proper, it is not ethical, and it is not even _logical_!" he exclaimed, though his acrid mood was slowly fading away into a humorous one.

I took the steaming cups of ramen out and smiled at him. "I'm telling you that I don't know…I guess I just wanted you to stay a little bit longer. It's been so long since we've spent time together like this without fighting or having some Hyuga practically staring at our _souls_." I nearly shuddered at the boy's eerie glares.

His mouth formed a perfect circle as he finally understood my non-licentious need for him to stay.

'_And he says __**I'm**__ the pervert._'

"I do not want to bother you." He said softly, trying to find an excuse to _leave_.

"You won't, you'll be keeping me company."

"Then I will sleep on the couch."

"I don't mind you sleeping in my-"

"NO. I do not think I should touch even an inch of your room this late at night." He scolded like a mother.

"I never said that."

Now I could only chuckle at his behavior since it was futile to be censorious about it. There was no use in disparaging such chivalrous virtues in Lee. It was just one of the countless attributes that made him so unique. He briefly returned my smile before he started to look uneasily at the food in front of him.

"You better eat." I ordered, remembering his malnourished body. "I don't want your body to start using up your muscles for energy."

"Now that would be just _horrible_ for you would it not?" he scoffed and consumed a small steaming cascade of noodles with his chopsticks.

"Well…I want to feel rocks, not just bones when I reach up your shirt." I said with a licentious smirk.

"Uh-huh." He said uneasily as he continued to eat and ignore my hedonistic comments.

It was just so much fun bringing that blood to his face.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"You are NOT sleeping on that!"

We soon found ourselves staring at a couch with a broken leg.

"Sakura, you just adore hitting things."

"Quiet." I mumbled, reminding myself that I might've kicked the furniture a _bit_ too roughly when I slammed against it. "It was dark so I couldn't see."

"Well, you have perfectly good aim at the very least." He joked as he kneeled down by the couch to inspect the damage.

I childishly stuck my tongue out at him and crossed my arms. "Well, I guess you'll have to sleep on the floor. Poor you." I said with an insinuating smile.

"Actually, I would prefer it." He responded as he stood up and stretched his arms behind his back. "I do not really have a liking to mattresses."

I gaped at him and wondered just what _kind_ of deprived childhood this man must've had.

"You're kidding…yeah?"

"No." he answered simply before heading up the stairs.

'_Well, at least now he's a bit more comfortable around my house._' I thought while I heard him rummaging through the hall's closet.

"What are you looking for!?" I hollered up the stairs.

"Blankets."

"Lee, you're not seriously going to-I was just only KIDDING Lee! I'm not going to let you sleep on the FLOOR!" I yelled.

I heard no answer as the idiot walked down the stairs with several blankets in his arms. He seemed to wear a satisfied smile on his face that taunted me and made me want to slap it off his lips. His innate preference for a bed was not the only thing that roused my interest. If anything, the facilitated way in which he lifted the couch and set it across the room was what made my heartbeat hasten. He seemed to be in an extremely self-conscious state once he realized I was staring at him with an open mouth. Lifting a couch was by no means difficult for me (hell, I could probably lift more weights than Lee ever _wished_ he could.) It was simply the almost fluid manner in which his muscles moved and his long arms extended to reach the furniture. It made me wonder what he would look like shirtless while carrying a heavy box from the attic that my mother and I "just couldn't pick up!".

"Sakura, it is rude to stare."

"Oh quiet."

He chuckled quietly before unfolding several of the blankets and placing them over the wooden floor. As soon as he did, I bolted out the living room and went to my room.

"You're not sleeping on the floor Lee!" I yelled as I got several pillows off my bed.

"Yes I am, and you are to sleep in your _own_ bed!" he loudly answered.

I snickered as I sprinted back down the stairs and dumped the pillows on top of the blankets. Before Lee could even open his mouth I slumped myself beside him, my somniferous state easily allowing me to join him in the pile of blankets on his new "bed."

"You are not sleeping on the _floor_ Sakura!" he reprimanded as he clambered several inches away from me.

"Yes I am! Don't you think I'd feel bad lying down on a bed while _YOU_ are down here!?" I asked, somewhat miffed from the fact.

"But you are a _woman_ Sakura! I will not allow you to rest here when you can be much more _comfortable_ in your own room!" he exclaimed irately all while slapping his hand over his forehead and dragging it down his face. (It seemed that gesture was becoming his idiosyncrasy.)

"And what if…" I began as I rested my body down on the opposite side of him, "what if…I was more comfortable being down here with _you_?"

I glanced at Lee long enough to see him open his mouth to respond, but quickly shut it.

"Do as you please then." He said tiredly as he turned off the light and sat by me on the floor with a face chary of me. (Knowing him, he was probably thinking about how "improper" this was.)

"This is..."

"_Improper_ I know. Be quiet."

"No-no, it is...nice…I suppose."

With that, I felt a cool blanket land softly against my skin as Lee covered me with it. He pulled the covers up to my chin and gave my shoulder a gentle squeeze before he returned to his side. Even in total darkness I could tell the probable color of his face. I could already picture him trying to suppress his erubescent cheeks, eyes and lips tightly shut from the tension. I fidgeted with the blanket and smiled when I realized he had given me his own. The idiot was barren of any protection against my chilly house. I released a cheery laughter that echoed through my living room and dumped half the blanket on him.

"You're such a dork Lee."

"Among other things." he said, gingerly accepting the warmth and avoiding any superfluous contact with me.

I sighed as the warm cover brought us within closer proximity. The sensation of having his back brush against my own brought chills to me each time we accidentally bumped against one another in the dark. The makeshift "bed" was by no means ample; we still had a table and sofa blocking our bodies from stretching too far. Needless to say, it was nearly impossible for us to even turn our bodies without having to smack each other across our backs and legs. It was only when I felt my leg jam against something concealed in Lee's pants that I relinquished my jittery movements and reverted to my corner.

"Sakura…OW…" it took him _several_ moments to find his cracked voice again through the certain anguish I had bestowed upon him. 

"Sorry." I mumbled all while expressing silent gratitude to the darkness for obscuring what I had struck.

"I honestly fail to see why you insist on sleeping here with me." he muttered as he tried to find a comfortable position to rest.

I shrugged and started plucking out the stray feathers that I felt were protruding from my pillow. It was difficult to give him an appropriate answer of why I wanted to be here with him. To say that I simply wanted to grope him while he slept was _far_ from the reasons I had in my mind (though the mere concept _was_ tempting.) No matter how brief the night would seem to me, I had already told him of my preference to be with him for a while longer. I wanted to relish every moment left with him before he turned back into the bastard his father had created. Even if he did, there was no way I could scorn him for acting in such a way. I suppose they were his coping skills, albeit a bit maladroit.

"Lee?"

"…Yes?...Do you need something?"

I desperately tried to swallow the huge wad of anxiety that had slowly become lodged in my throat. "I want you to…I…I think you should see someone about your problems."

The eerie silence that followed made me want to choke back my words. Lee's breath halted as his eyes surely scanned through the darkness in the room, giving the murky objects in it a greater importance over my recommendation. The statement seemed unnecessary--puerile even, but I needed to tell him with a growing insecurity. It would not let me be until I found help for him-no matter how much distress it would probably cost me. The alcohol in my system merely gave me the incentive to voice out such a request.

If there had been so much as a sliver of light, I swore I saw that Lee had turned his head over to look at me with a peculiar face, one that was often being reserved solely for me whenever I asked something foolish. It let me know I should not have said a word. He cleared his throat several times, giving me the impression that he thought my words had been a simple intoxicated rambling that deserved no acknowledgement. I wet my lips, suddenly feeling them arid from my breaths, and continued to torture myself with the unnerving thought that he needed time to process the simple information. The man lifted himself from the floor and crawled within inches of my space. He sat down in front of me, probably contemplating how to humor me. The propinquity had finally allowed me to see his facial expressions through the night's cloak of darkness.

I saw a smile…and fingers running through my short hair.

Still, he said nothing.

"I-I'm sorry, that was a stupid. I just…I just really want to help you." I muttered before inching away from him.

Lee's hand swiftly turned me over to my side to face him. He appeared to want to talk, but he shifted his gaze away from me.

"We can go to psychiatric therapy Lee…I know some people who can help you get better." I offered with hope.

Still, nothing was said on his part.

"Lee? _Lee_!? Why won't you answer me!? I want to help you! I want you to-"

"I think I know now why I cannot seem to stop despising you." He said softly, wearing that same smile as he caressed my hair.

My heart froze as I heard him, unwilling to bear the real motive behind his hatred.

"A-and?" my voice trembled, fear imminent in every syllable spoken. "Wh-what…is the reason?"

"I despise you for trying to help me…just like my comrades…but I…cannot help but care for you because of it."

"_What_?!" I asked, taken back by his odd analysis.

"It is futile Sakura…I am a bitter and miserable individual, nothing will ever change that." He added despondently.

"So what? You just want me to get out of your life? Is that it!?" I hissed, the alcohol fueling my candor.

"No that-….that is not what I meant….that is not what I meant at all…"

"Then what the hell _do_ you mean!?" I asked furiously while putting great effort in restraining my clenched knuckles.

The man sitting in front of me appeared as though he was bereft of words. His lips parted in an attempt to speak, but nothing took place. He was all but ready to offer me an explanation-a reason, for this idiocy.

Only a shaken sigh escaped despite his gall.

"I do not expect you to understand."

"_What_ don't I understand!? That you are hurting!? That something is wrong with you and I want to help you!? That I care for you far too much to let you do this to yourself! I understand perfectly well Lee!" I urged him to let me inside his thoughts. "If only you'd tell me what-"

"SAKURA! How can _YOU_ understand!? How can _YOU_, the little girl with the _ideal_ life with a caring mother and father EVER understand!?" he yelled, suddenly cutting off my entreating.

"Is _that_ what you think of me!?" I retorted, hoping to god we didn't end up killing each other. "Even _my_ life isn't _always_ perfect you idiot! We ALL have our problems-NOT JUST _YOU_! So _STOP_ acting like _YOU'RE_ the only one who's in pain!"

"Pain? _PAIN_?" he scoffed, "You know _nothing_ of the word. _Your_ childhood was filled to the brim with smiles and friends and sweet inane words!"

I held back the alluring urge to slap him across the face. "_MY_ childhood? When _I_ was in the academy, all the kids would make fun of me because of my GIANT forehead!"

"At the very least they did not tease you for your eyebrows!"

"They used to call me _Billboard _Brow! How is THAT not verbal abuse!?"

"So? They called _me_ a hot-blooded _loser_ _dork_!"

"They said I looked like a sheepdog! And they threw sticks at me while taunting me!"

"Well, they once pushed me in a cesspool!"

"Well _they_-!...Ew…really?"

It seemed this unexpected confession had sent some hilarity over our quarrel. The tips of my lips kept twitching into a smile, begging to open and release a flood of laughter. It seemed Lee noticed this for he continued to glare at me.

"It is not funny."

"Y-yeah i-it is." I said though repressed cackles.

"NO, it is not."

I was already laughing.

"Y-you-you poor guy!" I guffawed, trying to keep my intestines from popping from my stomach.

"_See_? This is _exactly_ why I did not want to sleep over! I already know how you get!" he exclaimed, his face a mixture of resentment and chagrin.

"Like what?" I asked innocently, cutting off my giggles.

"Acting like…like our fight never happened! Acting like we are fine even after all the spiteful words we throw at each other!" he spat while crossing his arms.

At that moment I had decided to simply eschew his random bursts of spite (screaming at each other would certainly not help his health.)

"Oh well, the bottom line is that I had a worse childhood than you." He mumbled before he returned to his spot and dumped his body on the hard surface.

"Can't argue with that, I'd be pretty much scarred if I ever said 'Lee, please be my boyfriend! I vow to protect you until the day I die!'" I exclaimed, trying with great difficulty not to laugh again. "That is enough to make me want to dig a hole and bury myself!"

"Sakura, quiet…you cannot even begin to imagine how embarrassing that memory is now."

"Embarrassing? The first time we met!? How can any of that be _embarrassing_!?" I said, a bit of pain biting at my chest.

"I do not regret meeting you, if that is what you mean. I simply do not like how I acted."

"Like a hot-blooded loser dork?"

"Yes, if you insist on putting it that way."

"Well I think you were _cute_ back then." I responded, placing my arms behind my head and feeling at ease now that he had pacified his emotions.

"Oh? Is that why you called me a weirdo and avoided all of my gestures of affection?"

"Keep in mind I also liked Sasuke at the time." I pointed out, remembering my almost traumatic obsession with the Uchiha.

"You do not need to remind me." he replied tersely.

"Jealous?" I teased with a smirk.

"Of _what_? That same girl is sleeping right next to me is she not?" he asked, squirming to find a suitable position to sleep in without waking up with a spinal injury.

"Would you still do anything for that girl Lee?"

"I suppose so." He mumbled.

"Then come with me tomorrow to find a therapist who will help you." I pleaded as I grabbed his hand and brought it to my lips.

Lee sighed, obviously irked from my ceaseless demand, but did not remove his hand. He growled slightly and looked at me.

"Will it make you go to sleep?" he finally asked while rubbing his weary eyes.

I wildly nodded my head, giving him what I _hoped_ was my most adorable grin.

"…fine…" he murmured halfheartedly.

In the midst of my bliss, I leaned over to kiss his forehead and cheeks.

"Thank you." I whispered, feeling a weight suddenly expunge from my chest as I hugged his arm. "Thank you so much."

"_This_ is why I did not want to stay."

I ignored his petty carping and closed my eyes.

"But you did, didn't you?" I questioned triumphantly.

He just groaned.


	24. Evocative Apologies and Engagements

Hello alo! I've missed updating _so_ much! I hope that all of you have been well and that your holidays were great! Mine were really nice too since I got to spend them with family and got a bunch of presents! There isn't enough times that I can apologize for my late, late, LATE update on the story. I had to finish the majority of it during break since I had to study for my finals. I did great on them (I was so worried that I wasn't!) And I got accepted into the Honors Society! Hopefully that'll bring more money towards college and achieving my goal. Anyway, I really hope you find this chapter to be at _least_ satisfactory. I tried my best to type it up and proof read it as fast as I could. Phew. Anyway, AGAIN, I would like to THANK YOU so much for your wonderful, funny, kind, and above all, HELPFUL reviews! There isn't a day that goes by that they don't make me smile upon remembering them! _You_ are what keeps this story worth writing. So anywho, without further ado: Read, Enjoy, and Recommend!

**Evocative Apologies and Engagements**

"Good morning."

"Grm…"

All I could do was growl in return when we rose the next day. (Considering I wasn't inured to waking up at such an ungodly hour, I think I answered the cheery greeting rather well.) My legs cramped up as soon as I tried to move them, my neck nearly cracked in half when I turned my head over to Lee, and my back felt like it had been slammed against a steel pole. My smile, however, appeared to be unfazed by the discomfort and aching of the night. The man next to me was already stretching his arms and trying to liberate himself from the tangled blankets around his waist. I had to frown at his actions. If there was anything I had a deep distaste for, it was someone rousing me from my sleep.

"Get back here." I demanded playfully and jerked him by the collar of his shirt.

With a yelp, he forcibly did as he was ordered and landed beside me.

"You are very affectionate in the mornings I gather?" he asked dryly as I wrapped my arms around his waist and avariciously pulled him towards me.

"M-hm." I concurred and smiled.

My left hand slowly traveled under his shirt and reveled upon the hidden flesh.

"You really _were_ serious when you said you would hold me to my word." He muttered with a bored tone when he felt my lecherous hand inching closer to his chest.

"Yeah…" I mumbled groggily, still not fully conscious of the daylight breaking in through my living room window. "You DID say…I could touch you…" I continued.

"Yes, but something told me I would regret it later." He answered flatly before pulling himself away from me.

I groaned from the loss of contact and reluctantly opened my eyes. Having to face the glaring light seeping through the curtains was not how I wanted to be greeted. Yawning, I tried to support my body weight with my elbows pressing against my pillow.

"What's up with _you_?" I asked, obviously peeved from his current dour mood.

"Nothing." Was his rather brisk reply.

"It sure doesn't _sound_ like nothing."

"Hm."

I shrugged, getting the obvious hint that he was in one of his "moods", and rose from our makeshift bed.

"Did you sleep well?" he asked once he realized I was leaving the room.

"You know…despite the fact that the floor is the _crappiest_ place to lie down…I actually _slept_! I haven't had any decent sleep in _months_ almost!" I admitted, taking the time to stretch my arms behind me.

"I am glad."

His words held faint sincerity in my ears.

I glanced at Lee and then at the clock ticking away at a wall. It seemed as though time itself had stopped and nothing existed but our distrait dispositions and awkward silences. My back slightly quivered when I felt his eyes rest upon me. His hair was a bit disheveled, creating a hint of amusement within me when he ran his fingers through it in agitation. I was certain that my hair was no different by the way I felt it protruding out in odd places. Black stains underneath Lee's eyes were somewhat less noticeable, adding to my relief that he had _also_ found some respite through last night's upheaval. Perhaps that was all he needed to release his tension; a night out, a drink, and some affection.

(That or a first-class hangover if he didn't already have one.)

"Are you all right?" I asked, studying the way his fingers ardently rubbed away at his temples as if to ward off a migraine.

He slowly nodded his head and pushed himself up from the blanket infested floor. His shuffled appearance did little to convince me of his condition.

"Do you want some aspirin?" I half joked, expecting him to shoot me a peeved glare.

I was surprised when he nodded his head and landed back down on the floor on his back. The palm of his hand was pressed against his forehead, supporting it as though it were about to fall. His eyes were shut either in deep contemplation or unimaginable anguish judging from the way he dared not move.

'_Well with all that crap he drank I'm surprised he's able to __**move**_'

I hurried off into the kitchen and dumped a whole packet of the white tablets in a glass. It was all I could do but wonder how Lee would handle a hangover. My appalling curiosity saw some hilarity over the concept, but my mind smacked it into submission when the thought of my mother coming home alarmed me. There was no way in hell I could ever explain a hung-over man lying on bed sheets in my living room floor.

"Drink up you dork." I advised as I practically shoved the liquid medication in his face.

Lee languidly accepted the drink, flinching slightly when his lips took their first sip.

"I have always hated the taste of medicine." He commented as he made a face at the bubbling water.

"Do you want to throw up?" I asked innocently as I cupped my hands behind my back and balanced myself with the soles of my feet. It seemed my curiosity of watching the effects of overindulgence in Lee was growing as he took huge swigs from the glass, looking as though he wanted to end this grotesque experience as quickly as possible.

"No."

"Are you nauseous?"

"NO."

"Are you-"

"NO!"

I smirked as he handed me the now empty glass. "And here I thought you said that alcohol didn't affect you anymore." I teased.

Lee could only growl as he dumped his body back on the floor. "My head hurts simply from inadequate sleep with you moving around last night."

"You little liar."

"You were! You were groping me with every opportunity that presented itself!"

"I can do that when I'm _awake_, why would I want to do that while I'm asleep?" I asked in puzzlement.

Lee shot me a disparaging look before he burrowed himself inside several blankets.

"Sakura…you are just so…lewd." He mumbled as he curled up in our "bed".

"You could've just left me alone if I was bothering you that badly." I suggested with a shrug.

"But you-! You kept grabbing me so I had to-what _ELSE_ could I do? You arms were all over me every time I managed to close my eyes! It was as though I was your stuffed toy that-!"

"Anyway, since you say you're not hung over I guess you won't mind coming with me to find a therapist." I casually cut his ranting off as I set the empty glass on a nearby table.

Lee's head popped from under his covers, mouth closed with palpable aggravation and eyes wishing me dead.

"I am not going." He responded sternly.

I blinked several times, looking at him as though I had just bitten the skin of a lemon. The thought of giving him a lopsided smile crossed my mind when I realized he was probably just sulking. Allowing my legs to give out, I crawled to his side and ruffled his already unkempt hair. He was such a child sometimes.

"O-of course you are...you said so yourself last night."

"I am not going." He repeated with his usual composure.

"But…" I was about to protest playfully before I saw the bleakness in his eyes. The bleakness that painfully reminded me that _my_ Lee had ran away from me yet again.

He jerked free from my fond touch and placed some distance between us.

"But…" my voice faltered with this unprompted adversity, "Lee y-you..you PROMISED me!" I exclaimed in disbelief. (The day Lee broke a promise was the day all hell froze.)

"If you recall, I never _promised_ anything." He pointed out coolly.

"But you made me believe as if you were giving me your _word_! Lee you told me you would go-!"

"Forget it Sakura...just-just forget it! It was the alcohol talking and nothing more." He explained.

This only ripped open a mending wound deep inside me.

"B-but you were still in control of yourself!" I exclaimed, trying to find even a paltry amount of logic in his responses.

"I was under the influence the _whole_ time Sakura! What made you think I was actually giving you my _word_ about seeing a psychiatrist!?" he asked, "You strike me as rather pathetic if you were willing to believe everything I told you considering the state I was in last night!"

I stayed on my knees listening intently to every word he said, every word that forced me to feel like a foolish child who had been duped. I couldn't even open my mouth since he interrupted me before I could.

"But-"

"You think everything is so easy Sakura! You are such a credulous child!" he snapped.

For the briefest of moments, Lee appeared as though he lamented his words as his eyes met my own. He turned his back toward me and attempted to act as though what he had said had no effect on him. Perhaps it was not _even_ an act, perhaps he had meant every single word. My smile had dissipated, my words had forsaken me, and my expression probably resembled that of a maltreated little girl. I tried to stop my lower lip from trembling when he turned his head over to ignore me. Whether my motor reactions were out of shock or downheartedness was unknown to me.

"Then…" I fought with the urge to lose my quivering voice, "th-then…I'm glad I didn't do anything last night that I would regret. To think I wanted to…"I bit my lip and shut my eyes to desperately conceal the blatant blush staining my face.

"What _did_ you want? What did you _expect_?" Lee retorted venomously. "Were you waiting for us to _kiss_? Were you waiting for me to sleep in your bed to _ravage_ you? You have a rather deplorable and unrealistic view on intimacy if that is what you hoped for Sakura."

It felt as though my throat was trying to swallow a nail as I listened to him unrelentingly insult my emotions. It was an ordeal just to find my voice. "I never expected that…n-not ever. Th-the only damn reason why I invited you…the only reason why I wanted to sleep so close to you was because I wanted to spend more time with you." I tried to explicate my behavior.

"You are far too affectionate for your own good then."

"W-well…a-at least I'm not like you who won't let anyone come _near_ him…at least I'm no coward…at least I-I express myself." I admitted slowly, sensing that I had been made the enemy in this struggle.

"Coward? _Coward_? At least _I_ am not still stuck in a rut."

"What the hell do you mean by that?" I asked defensively.

"You know _exactly_ what I mean…you are just looking for your next rush, your next fixation, your next obsession-your next SASUKE!" his voice hitched to an flare-up as he finally expressed what had probably been on his mind since we had met. "You are just a pathetic woman who cannot outgrow the desperate clingy little girl still trapped within that body!"

His words struck like a slap across my face. My gaping mouth suddenly closed from fear of rousing his fury even more. Each horrid syllable was a twisted needle thrust into my chest and snarled inside my ribs. I rested a hand upon my struggling lungs, trying to grasp the precious organ within me that had been shattered. Lee had openly yelled what I myself never had the audacity to profess in all the years I had lived. It was as though the man before me had finally given me a mirror and coerced me to see the disintegrating person I really was. I swallowed my tears, bracing myself for a second onslaught of macabre realizations from Lee.

Surprisingly none came.

Merely a pressure was felt against my face.

For a moment I thought I had been slapped, beaten into self-loathing despair, reproached beyond forgiveness. Any tears I possessed were arid as I blinked my eyes to process what had happened to me. Strong arms grasped the sides of my stomach with enough force to lose my balance, yet the pressure was still there. My cheeks did not sting, if anything it felt as though I had bitten my own lip.

"Sakura…I hate you _so_ much."

By the time it took me to rack sense into my brain, I realized my lips were moist with Lee's actions as he clutched my sides. I tried to talk but found my words muffled by his mouth once more.

'_Hate…' _

Lee rested his chin on top my head before he regained the distance between us, studying me for any type of reaction from my almost catatonic state.

"Tell me…" he muttered before his eyes shot up to meet mine.

"Wh…" I was left breathless, trying to figure out why my lips were numb.

"Please…_please_ tell me what I must do before you let me be." He begged listlessly.

I shook my head in confusion as I held my forehead with both hands. "Wh…what-I-I don't understand." I stuttered, still in awe over what he had done.

"TELL ME WHAT YOU WANT!"

His bellows made my whole body flinch in alarm, placing even more distance between us as I scooted away from him.

He didn't allow me the luxury of moving away from our proximity. His hand pulled me towards him, trapping me as I crashed into something soft. My breaths sped up when I realized I had lost my balance and landed on my side by several bed sheets. I turned my attention back to Lee who was currently nearly ripping his shirt as he took it off in front of me. I would have thought this display to be rather erotic if my whole system wasn't struck with terror over what he was going to do next.

"What are you-"

Lee gave me no opportunity to speak as he roughly tilted my chin to his face.

"I will kiss you if that is what you need…if you want sex then I will give it to you…just _tell_ me what you want so you will leave me alone! Stop making me feel like I am actually _worth_ something to you!" he yelled as he threw his shirt in my lap as though it were some spiteful gift.

"Wh-_SEX_?" I felt my eyes widened from shock and disgust. "Lee do you honestly think the whole reason why I'm attracted to you is because of _SEX_!?" I screamed in disbelief.

"Why _ELSE_ would you touch me as you do!?" he seethed, eyes blazing with fury.

"Because I _love_ you?" I seemed to ask my answer as though he were an idiot.

"Do not _dare_ insult me by telling me that! How dare you, of all people, excuse yourself with that?"

"Lee DROP IT!" I pleaded, feeling tainted with the insinuation of every remark. "Yes, I admit it Lee! When I was young I was just this stupid little girl who didn't know what she wanted in life. I was an _idiot_! But now I have the maturity to realize who I really care for!"

"Spare me Sakura! You have never cared for anyone but yourself!" he pointed out callously, not even bothering to hear what I wanted to say.

"Lee why won't you believe me!?"

"Just tell me what you WANT!" he tried to win over my voice as his lips came within inches of mine.

"I WANT YOU TO _LISTEN_ TO ME!" I nearly screeched, getting sick from his deaf ranting.

"Why should I? Sakura please just sleep with me and get it over with…I will do anything you want if it means getting you out of my life." He begged as he leaned in for another incensed kiss.

I managed to dodge it as I sunk away and pushed him to the other side of the bed.

"As tempting as your offer is Lee…I'll punch you next time you try to kiss me." I muttered threateningly as he tried to rise.

"What do you-!"

"I don't want sex, I don't want gratitude, hell-I don't even want _acknowledgement_ at this point. All I want is to get you help."

"But why-"

"Come on Lee! Please!? Don't make me angry again, don't make me _hurt_ again! I really want to help you!" I began to supplicate the young man to no avail.

His dark eyes flared from my request. "You wish to help me? Then leave me ALONE! I cannot begin to tell you how annoyed I get whenever you ask these things of me." He retorted, raising his hands up in the middle of his frustration.

I took a deep breath and contemplated on ways to pacify him and end this stupid fight.

"I don't want you because of lust Lee…" I seemed to softly repeat his words when I questioned his affections toward me. "I respect you far too much to think of you like that and-"

"I HATE YOU! STOP TELLING ME ALL YOUR DAMN LIES! I HATE YOU SO M-"

His body grew tense against my own, his arms which at some point had been thrashing about to prove his point had grown limp by his sides, and I swore I felt a sob strangle in his throat. My hands stubbornly clung to his shoulders and pressed him against me, allowing his warmth and scent to envelope me. In the midst of his vigorous ranting I simply decided to silence his words within a tight embrace. If I clutched on to his body any closer I feared I would suffocate him. Apologies rambled past his lips, empty words that meant nothing to me. I wanted to take away his fury that troubled him so, to wane his agony over his past and force him to realize how much he was loved. It was just so-_HE_ was just so…

"Lee…you're so difficult." I muttered as I held on to his head. "You're such an..."

His curled up body violently shook with every breath he drew, lips and cheeks I had yearned to kiss under better circumstances grew pallid. To my relief, his eyes were glassy but no tears dared to appear. The poor idiot was trying with every fiber of his being to regain his dignity in front of a woman.

"I…I want to hate you so badly Sakura…so _badly_…" his spiteful voice was muffled against my chest as he tried to excuse his callous acts. "But…yet I want to…I apologize for my brash actions…"

"It's all right Lee…it's all right," I soothed, "forget about it…j-just promise…promise you'll go with me." I continued to beseech the weary boy.

His frail struggles to free himself from my grasp finally diminished as he mulled over his probably horrid choice.

"…A-all…all right…" he said shakily as I relaxed my hold on him. "I will go…"

I released a sigh of elation when he finally complied. There really _was_ no telling how often his mood would oscillate between _my_ Lee and one I detested.

"I just really want you to get help Lee…you have no idea how much I care about you…" I whispered in his ear, hoping to further alleviate his disposition.

"I am…I am afraid to go." He admitted slowly, his voice barely audible from between my chest.

"Don't be…"

Lee's hair gave way to momentum as he turned his head upwards to face me. A look of certain trepidation was evident his nervous eyes. "But what if I cannot be helped? What if I never get better? What if-"

"Lee!" I interrupted as I grabbed his face in both my hands and lifted it to meet my eyes. "You have convinced people you're a genius, you have grown stronger than any person ever even _thought_ you could be, you have survived operations with the lowest survival rates!…I'm…it would be foolish to say you weren't going to make it through _this_."

"But what if-"

"NO! You are going and you are going to get better Lee!" I snapped, earning a surprised whimper from him as I pulled his body back towards me. "You're going to get better…I promise."

"Why do you care Sakura?" his questioned was barely audible. "After all this! After all the hurtful things I say, why-"

"Because I-…" I contemplated my answers, each appearing more sentimental than the last. "Because you're my friend Lee…I've already told you that." I muttered, damning my lack of gall whenever the situation truly called for it.

There was a pause, one that made me wonder if it was filled with a tinge of lament or disappointment on Lee's behalf.

"…_Why_?..."

"Because I…because I need you."

"You are…you are very selfish." He chuckled.

"Yeah but-"

The ring of my doorbell interrupted our intimate moment.

"Damn…" I cursed at the dreadful sound at the door and wondered in alarm if it was my mother.

'_No…it's not her…she has keys…and that chakra flow…_' I was both placated and puzzled by the identity of the person paying me a visit.

A second ring forced me to loosen my grip on Lee.

"I'm not going to open it…I don't want to let go." I contradicted my actions when I looked down at him resting against my chest.

The man regaining his control slowly closed and opened his eyes, giving me the impression of a surprised child, and glanced at the intruding door. "You should…I think you will like this visitor." He muttered as he hesitantly pulled himself away from me.

"Don't." I entreated pitifully when he abandoned my arms.

I felt a whimper escape my lips when I became witness to a displeasing act. Not only had the idiot decided to tear himself from me, but he had commenced the lamentable task of clothing himself again. Abs that could be used to grate were quickly hidden from my viewing pleasure by that troublesome black shirt that taunted me every time he stretched.

"What makes you think I'll _like_ the person behind the door?" I asked accusingly as I crossed my arms. "They just ruined my slim chances of getting laid!" I added, practically whining but _half_ joking once I rose from the bed.

For a long awkward moment, all Lee could do was give me a puzzled look and a quirked eyebrow at my sudden self-contradicting words. He sighed and shrugged, (chances were he was finally accepting the fact that he could never rid me of my lecherous comments) and buttoned up any last tantalizing glimpses in his shirt.

"Sometimes I think it is _you_ who needs the help." He pointed out with a hint of amusement in his voice.

My retorts had to wait once I heard a fist practically _slamming_ itself against my door.

"SAKURA! OPEN UP! I KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE!" my thick door did little to hush the screaming feminine voice behind it.

'_Is that…?_' I almost slipped on my wooden floor as I rose from our bed (earning a derisive chuckle from Lee) as I made my way to the voice.

"Lee, hide those blankets! Or else they're going to think I really _did_ have sex with you!" I hissed in my lowest whisper as I inspected the chaotic room.

He rolled his eyes and motioned to open the door.

"SAKURA!" the impatient voice threatened to shake my house.

"Coming!" I exclaimed as I peered into my door's peephole.

Through the condensation of the glass I could barely make out one figure. A girl wrapped up in a thick jacket was standing by it wearing a rather peeved expression, arms akimbo and one foot tapping impatiently on the floor. Her hands, quivering from the early morning frost, clutched two white bags so tightly I could see her white knuckles even from my distance. Her florid cheeks and visible breath told me she had traveled and waited quite a while to earn that pose.

"TENTEN!" my screeching nearly made Lee cover his ears in horror. "IT'S TENTEN!" I repeated again as though he had not heard me the first time.

"Good for you…" he grumbled as he rubbed his head and started gathering blankets.

Ignoring his apathetic mood, I quickly undid the locks and jerked the door open to reveal my sullen looking friend.

"TENTEN!" I exclaimed happily with a warm smile. "How are y-"

The brown-haired teenager lifted her index finger in front of my face, informing me that my voice was unnecessarily strident. I immediately shut my mouth, wondering why she was wearing such a bitter scowl on her face. Her brows seemed to be creased with the mixture of scorn and anticipation from some cause unknown to me. Being cautious not to open my mouth again, I stepped to the side of the door and motioned with a hand for her to enter. Her ominous facial expression and erect posture as she came inside the house made me swallow a lump that was slowly forming in my throat. It cleared into nothing when I noticed she hadn't even _glanced_ at Lee.

"Ten….ten?" I carefully addressed her.

Her eyes narrowed to fatal slits as her attention was reverted to me.

"How are y-"

"YOU _IDIOT_!" she roared in my face so abruptly that I fought the urge to hide behind the sanctity of Lee's back.

"Wh-what the? Wh-what's _wrong_?"

"I _TOLD_ you to lay off those caffeinated DRINKS Sakura! I _TOLD_ you!" she scolded me in a tone that was _oddly_ familiar to that of my mother's.

(It seemed everybody in Team Gai had an innate tendency to treat me and _talk_ to me like a child.)

I hated it.

"B-but I'm fine now! _See_?" I tried to soothe her anxiety by pointing to my face, (although the revels of last night were probably taking its toll on my skin.)

This, however, only made Tenten's thinning lips disappear completely from my sight as her eyes grew wide with rejuvenated rage. "You look like _CRAP_! I went to your house THREE times yesterday and you were _GONE_! I _barely_ get word from Tsunade that you wake up and I find you _MISSING_!"

"But I-!"

Breath that was planned to be spent on explanations got caught within my throat as it was forced out of my lungs. My ribs felt like they were cracking as her arms embraced my unsuspecting body.

"I was so damn worried about you Sakura! I didn't-…I didn't know whether you were all right.." her voice softened once she realized I was fine.

"W-well…I'm okay…now." I wheezed through my prison.

Huge swigs of air were taken as she finally released me, earning yet _another_ mocking chuckle from the man in the other room.

"Shut up Lee! Tenten's hugs are worse than _Gai's_!"

Silence. Utter…complete…silence.

I quirked an eyebrow once Tenten's and Lee's eyes met for the briefest of seconds only to be turned away. Their eyes shifted away from each other as quickly as if they had been exposed to a bright light. Both heads either decided to face some inanimate object in my room or myself for advice. I could give none. All I could do was stare in perplexity over their bizarre behavior. Lips were pressed together so tightly they grew pale and eyes began to slowly narrow in spite.

"Neji's been looking for you, you know." She spat out rather bitterly.

"I trust you have already talked to him?" he asked calmly, walking up to me.

Tenten scoffed and stared daggers at the floor. "I haven't talked to that idiot since yesterday."

"..Ah."

Her eyes persistently clung to the floor, never once reaching up to meet Lee's. Her hands, although freed from the weight of her bags, continued to stay balled up in trembling fists that seemed to threaten Lee if he took a wrong step. I witnessed the sight before me with a nervous knotting in my stomach and heavy pulsation of my heart. He walked past her as though she was just another piece of furniture in my living room, as though she wasn't even _there_. A sense of familiar tension sated my nervous system, a tension I had not felt since a certain quarrel between my teammates that nearly broke us apart. I was watching the bleak scenario repeat in front of me.

And I was as helpless as I was then.

There was nothing I could do.

Tenten turned her head the opposite direction of Lee, acting as if that would make him disappear.

"Have you talked to Gai?" It was her turn to ask the whereabouts of one of her teammates.

"I have better uses for my time than to do such a thing."

"…_Fine_…"

Both their words seemed like ice shards aimed directly at the deepest parts of their hearts.

"Sakura…I will come back here in the afternoon...," he whispered in my ear before he kissed my cheek. "I promise." He added to reassure me.

I could see Tenten's teeth digging into her bottom lip as Lee continued to walk past her. She appeared as though he wasn't _worth_ her attention, as if he was just another stranger walking past her.

That's really all they were.

What had happened?

"You should thank Neji you know…" he whispered when he passed her, "he gave himself up so you could be spared."

Tenten's eyes widened and faltered for a brief moment, appearing as though something tacit had finally been explained to her. Her cheeks flushed, making me question what had brought about this effect.

"So the invincible Maito still lives?" he asked before she could speak. His question, however, held no tinge of concern, no trace of empathy, merely candid impudent sarcasm.

I held back a gasp at his unmitigated insolence, his ability to flaunt his disregard to his father figure was almost unbelievable. I turned back to Tenten, wondering how she would deal with his harsh words. She seemed willing to carve his face out with a kunai judging from her expression. Something seemed to snap within her, something she had not hoped to unleash. Through the gnawing pressure of her teeth, a speck of blood seeped through her ashen lips before the door closed behind him.

"Go to hell Lee." she muttered resentfully.

I stared speechless at the closed door, somewhat relieved I hadn't had to prevent a fight between the two of them. Tenten's face seemed unchangeable even after she had stopped glaring at the door and turned her attention to me. It was almost as if her hostility had been redirected towards _me_.

"Wh-why are you giving me that look?" I asked, my voice hesitating slightly at her demeanor.

Finally realizing the extent of her enmity at unintended targets, she looked away and rubbed her eyes tiredly. I, however, was not convinced.

"You were glaring at me just now…what did I do that bothered you?" I asked frankly.

She shook her head, picked up the white bags from the ground, and tried to hand them to me. "Forget about it…"

"NO." I demanded to know all while rejecting her offer. "I won't. Tell me, what did I do?"

She opened her mouth and slowly shut it, never once taking her eyes off me.

"_What_?" I asked, exasperated by her diffident face.

"Did you…did you…_do_ something with Lee last night?" she finally asked with a slight blush.

The implication to her question would have made me laugh had we not been on the verge of fighting.

"You mean…like..-OH! UGH! Tenten! You know me better than _THAT_!" I nearly scolded. "What made you even _THINK_ that?"

"Your hair smells like cigarette smoke." She accused while looking askance at me.

"_So_?"

"You both had a bed head, there's a cup with aspirin in it, not to mention there's a _couch_ with a broken leg! What the hell were you two _doing_!?" she asked despairingly.

For once I thought her excellent analytical skills to be quite inconvenient if she was using them in my house. (I was just thankful Lee had had the decency to hide the pillows and blankets upstairs with that inhuman speed of his.) I took a deep breath and thought of a way to explain the situation that involved no intercourse. With Tenten's expression, it would be nearly impossible to convince her I was still "innocent." I had to inwardly gag at her faint trust in me if she wouldn't believe me.

"Look…we…we didn't have _sex_ Tenten…we went out and I kind of asked him to stay." I uttered, avoiding her judgmental eyes.

"Ah…did you two drink?"

"Y-yeah maybe…why does it matter?"

"My old identification card is hanging out of your pocket." She stated flatly while pointing at it.

"I thought you let him borrow it." I said honestly as I handed her the card.

She refused it with a wave of her hand and smiled for the first time since I had seen her.

"No…I gave it to him as a joke when we were younger."

"A joke?"

"Yeah…I told him…I told him you could use it in case the slim chance of you accepting his offer to a date _ever_ happened." She tried not to laugh sheepishly as she said this.

"Ah…well…he took _full_ advantage of the gift I can assure you." I pointed out with a grin, placing the card back in my pocket and making my way up to my room.

Noticing Tenten's silent fury had finally been calmed as she followed suit, I cautiously accepted the bags and found them to be quite heavy. I had to smile once I saw what was inside of them. A few tiny cartons of ice cream, bags of a chips, and _diet_ caffeine free soda were waiting to be devoured as they fit snugly within the plastic. I looked up to thank Tenten, but found she was occupied with making herself comfortable in my room as she slammed her body into my bed. Stretching lazily and yawing, she motioned for me to sit. Was I really that predictable?

"Looks like Lee beat me to it." She read my mind as she studied the assortment of junk food scattered in my room. "And here I was looking for soda that wouldn't put you back in the hospital."

"Tenten…why'd-"

"Did you know that Neji and Gai Sensei had been keeping what happened to Lee away from my knowledge?" her question had been spontaneous and random. One that had caught me off guard even.

"I…well-" I was stunned from her abrupt choice of topic.

She quickly answered the reason for her eerie scorn against Lee as she interrupted me. "Even _YOU_ found out about it before I did…man, am I _really_ that unimportant?" she seemed to ask the ceiling as she stared at it.

"That's what I was going to ask y-"

"Neji went to my house yesterday morning…do you know what he told me?" she asked again, showing trivial interest in my responses.

"What did he-"

"He said it was only to _PROTECT _me, he said he and Gai Sensei didn't want to _WORRY_ me, he told me there wasn't nothing I could've done to _HELP_ anyway." She spat venomously as the memory ran through her mind with renewed ire. "Am I really…am I really that _useless_?"

I felt as though I needed to answer but there were no fitting words that could be said on my behalf. What _could_ I say when I had once been on the same exact position as she was? I knew better than anyone what it felt like to be excluded from secrets your whole team knew. Whether it was due to my gender or softer nature, _nothing_ justified the vulnerability and futility I had been put through in my years as a genin in Team Kakashi.

'_Then again…I was pretty much weak back then…_' I bitterly admitted to myself.

Their intentions might have been kind, but the consequences had left me questioning my self-worth.

"He told me to go see Gai…but I don't want to…I-I'm so angry with them right now. Is it because I'm a girl? Oh god…I don't want to see him…I don't want to see _anyone_ from my team…" she seemed to saunter between her worries and confessions, never thinking long enough to come up with a solution for them. "All this _time_….all this time and not _once_ did they ever mention Lee's…Lee's _condition_!"

I could only nod my head in sympathy, simply deciding to accept her thoughts rather than remark on them.

"He told me about Lee's dad….after all this time…I'm SUCH an idiot to not have noticed." She continued to insult herself.

"Well…there's no use beating yourself up about it. Why don't you try talking it out with Neji?" I suggested, hoping she'd finally stop ranting about something she clearly had no fault in.

"I tried to…I really did…but when he started saying all that crap to me I-I…I _slapped_ him." She muttered softly in hope of meshing her words away from my hearing range.

I quirked an eyebrow and released a surprised giggle. "Y-you…y-you did…_WHAT_?"

Tenten immediately seemed to loath my reaction when she started hearing snickers instead of supportive advice from my direction. Her deadly look only made my snickers escalate into a full-blown fit of tearful giggling.

"What did he _SAY_ after you did it!?" I tried to not snort from my unrelenting laughter as I held on to the sides of my stomach to control myself.

All the men were getting slapped these days.

"Well…he-he didn't say anything..he just kind of stared at me…he was probably caught off guard since not even _I_ knew I was going to do something like that." She admitted, her eyes having the familiar far-off view one had when recollecting embarrassing mistakes.

It wasn't until she threw me another dirty look that I thought it best to halt my actions.

"So ah…" I began, placing all my effort in keeping a straight face, "what are you going to do now?"

All I received were two shoulders slowly ascending in response.

"I don't know…I don't want to see any of them right now…"

"Tenten?"

"What?"

"What…what exactly happened…back _there_?" I asked, worried about her detached disposition toward Lee.

Her eyes immediately left my attention and stared up at the ceiling aimlessly.

"I don't know Sakura…I don't know. All I want to do is relax."

'_Relaxing…_' my mind immediately went to the most tranquil location in Konoha.

"He doesn't deserve my attention…not after what he's done to Gai Sensei, not after-"

"Do you want to take a bath with me?" I asked abruptly, wondering why Tenten was staring at me with such a horrified expression on her face.

"_What_? Sakura I hate the men in my team but that doesn't mean that I-"

"I meant the hot springs stupid!" I exclaimed, growing red from her rather lewd conclusion.

Her eyes grew wide in comprehension and relief. "Oh…OH! I..well…sure…I guess." She answered with a halfhearted grin.

'_And Lee thought __**I**__ was perverted._'

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The scalding water splashed carelessly against my skin as I slowly plummeted to the shallow part of the spring. I could feel my cheeks already burning up in response to the harsh temperature, but I paid it no mind as I sunk my body deeper into the soothing water. I released a relaxed sigh while looking up at the passing clouds. They seemed to promise a copious amount of rain that would probably drench our bodies if we didn't leave the springs like all of the women had. We were alone, save for the occasional sound of swaying water. Tenten mimicked my sigh as she cupped her hands together and threw some water on her weary face. She wrapped the towel around her even tighter as she waded towards me. Even from my distance there seemed to be dark smudges of restiveness that inundated the bottom of her eyes and lingered even as she smiled.

I wondered if it would leave once Lee got better.

Probably not.

"This is nice…I'm so glad you thought about this…" she said with a tranquil moan as she submerged herself up to her neck.

I attempted to find a comfortable position to learn against a rock. Finding it quite slick with the lack of friction, I gave up in the process as I continued to slip off. Tenten giggled at my antics as I struggled to keep my towel on.

"Wouldn't it be easier to just take it off?" she asked.

"No way…Jiraiya might be somewhere nearby…" I joked, shivering slightly at the pervy sage's "research".

'_It's no wonder Tsunade almost killed him at some point._'

"Ew…Sakura…he's like…a _hundred_ years older than you." She pointed out, making me laugh from her exaggeration.

"Yeah…" I mumbled, letting my lips touch the calming liquid before blowing bubbles in it.

It seems as though the reason why we were here was forgotten and washed away as easily as the cigarette smoke from my hair. Perhaps it _wasn't_ forgotten, it was merely being delayed until neither one of us possessed the prudence to not resurface such a sensitive subject. We awkwardly waited for our voices to be heard, but there was little we could do except playfully splash water at each other. Tenten began to fidget with her hair until her buns released a cascade of hair that floated around her.

"Ah, there, that's better." She said insipidly.

I nodded my head approvingly, (although I found it quite unnecessary.) We floated about in silence, waiting and detesting the topics we still had to discuss. I shivered against the cool wind and momentarily sunk my whole body into the water in hopes of warming up. I feared I would rather drown myself than talk about Team Gai with Tenten. The latter would bring me much more pain than I cared to endure.

"We wouldn't be alive if it weren't for Gai Sensei you know." Was the first thing I heard as I popped my head up from the surface of the water.

"How so?" I asked, realizing talking about the subject was becoming a feasible task.

"He went after Lee after he practically went insane when he saw his father…or rather…just the man who gave him life…no _father_ would ever do that to their child…" her eyebrows creased as she corrected herself. "Who would have thought that the scrolls we retrieved were the ones that man had stolen?"

I nodded my head, somehow fearing to speak lest I broke her will to tell me the rest of the incident. I dampened a small towel and placed it over my head as I motioned for her to continue. She nervously poured water over her shoulders and arms, shivering from both the memory and climate.

"Th-then…well I suppose Neji and I went after them…we were careless…not even Neji had his guard up. We were caught…they restrained Neji and threw me in a cellar. I was so scared of what they were going to do…" she struggled to say each word as she recollected her memories.

"D-did they…?" I asked before I swallowed my words.

'_No…I can't even say something like that._'

"Did they what? Do anything to me? No…thank heavens no. I suppose I have Neji to somehow thank for that." She answered dryly as she slapped at the water unenthusiastically.

Lee's words about Neji rung inside my head. Had he really saved her?

"He must…really care about you." I remarked, growing puzzled as to why it had made her so flustered.

She snorted and angrily rubbed her arm with a drenched towel. "He probably thought I was a hindrance."

"He thinks of you as a _comrade_ and _friend_." I corrected rather harshly.

I knew better than to watch helplessly as someone dwelled on their shortcomings. I had done enough of that in my past and I was not ready to watch another girl go through the same predicament. If she had been as feeble as I had then perhaps she could torture herself like this. But Tenten had always been a strong girl, _much_ too strong to doubt her self worth.

"I don't know Sakura…after what Neji and Gai kept from me, I honestly don't know whether they are still considered my comrades." She retorted resentfully. "Aren't teammates supposed tell each other everything?"

She was scrubbing her arm raw.

"I hate them all…Gai, Neji, Lee…they can all go to hell for lying to me."

"Tenten, believe me, I know how it feels…" I soothed, not knowing how else to express my condolences to her situation.

"I don't understand them."

"Maybe it's because you've never tried to." I stated, regretting my foolish words.

Tenten shot her upper body from the water, looking insulted from my frank remark.

"What do you mean? If anything, _THEY'RE_ the idiots who didn't understand _ME_!" she spat out.

"But you're their teammate…as much as you hate to hear it, they really _were_ just trying to protect you."

"How?"

"What happened to Lee…they probably couldn't find any reason to tell you without you becoming worried for him…think about how your concern for him would've hindered your performance during missions." I tried desperately to make her understand. "Sure Neji is a coldhearted jerk to many people, including me…and to my team…a-and probably to the rest of our friends…and to his family..but anyway-he is NOT the type of person to just callously hurt _you_."

It seemed my persuasion was finally getting through to Tenten as my reasoning sunk into her.

"And right now…Lee, Neji, and Gai Sensei need your support more than ever! They all care about you so much yet you're so angry over something they kept from you only so you wouldn't worry!"

"Then why did Neji say it in a way that made me feel _completely_ left out and useless?!"

"He didn't mean it in _that_ way Tenten!" I tried to explain. "There _WAS_ nothing you could've done, there wasn't ANYTHING _anyone_ could've done! He was just doing it to protect you!"

Tenten slowly closed her mouth as I finished my tirade, looking at me with unspoken comprehension. She soon returned to the water and shivered from the cool air enveloping us. Something about her expression told me that nothing else needed to be said to convince her of her friends' kind intentions. We seemed to idly float as we waited for the discomfited moment to pass. I hated these silences I always had to endure whenever I talked to _ANY_ member in Gai's team. I _hated_ it.

"I feel like an idiot…" she finally stated as she began to wade back to edge of the hot spring.

"Where are you going?"

"To see Gai Sensei."

"H-hold on! I'm going with you!" I exclaimed, popping up from the comfort of the water and following her. I felt something slip off my skin but I paid it no mind as I tried to catch up to her.

(I had also not noticed that I was feeling rather nippy.)

If it weren't for Tenten's laughter I would not have realized that my towel had completely deserted me.

"Shut up Tenten!" I demanded as I used both hands to cover up my chest. I frantically looked around for my towel but it could not be seen. For all I knew it had sunk into the bottom of the spring.

'_Joy…_'

"Better hurry, I'm not waiting for you!" she called out as she got out of the water and entered the changing rooms.

"You _ASS_!" I yelled as I continued to run after her despite my 'problem'.

"I bet Lee would just _love_ to see you right about now." I could barely make out her voice from my distance.

"SHUT UP!" came my mortified reply.

It seemed all of Gai's students enjoyed teasing me to no end as well.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I sighed in pleasure as I took a couple of gulps from a soda Tenten had bought me on our way. She had apparently taken great pity on me when we realized my screams could be heard all the way into the _men's_ hot springs and decided to humor me with treats.

"Thanks." I mumbled as I finished my drink.

I looked at our surrounding and couldn't help but quirk an eyebrow. This certain street we were searching for Gai….was…questionable.

"Tenten…is Gai Sensei's apartment close by here?" I asked, wondering why all the buildings appeared…familiar.

'_Oh yeah…Lee and I got drunk in one of these…_' I finally remembered.

The realization made my blood freeze.

"Neji told me Gai would be here if I ever decided to see him." She answered softly as her eyes scanned the different bars.

"He doesn't drink." I quickly stated. Denial, surprise, and forlorn hope drenched my words as I said them.

"He does now." She replied tersely.

I blinked and continued to follow her as we walked past the few people crowding the street. It wasn't even _noon_ yet, I didn't understand what such an esteemed and cheerful sensei could be doing in this despondent part of the village. The scattered drunks and nearly empty bars only intensified my depression as I dragged my heavy feet. Air mingled with alcohol and the revels of last night rose to my nostrils, nearly making me gag. This wasn't a place for someone like Gai Sensei so early in the day. It wasn't a place for him at all.

'_Lee…you are in __**so**__ much trouble if I find out this is because of __**you**__.' _

I inwardly growled and clenched my knuckles before I ran into Tenten.

It seemed she had stopped.

"He's in there…get your ID out." She muttered as she went on ahead of me.

"W-wait!" I exclaimed, fidgeting with my pockets to retrieve my booze ticket.

'_I'll be lucky if they don't kick me out since they just saw Tenten.' _

The man in front of the door merely bothered to look at the birth date and welcomed me without hesitation. I inwardly scoffed at the man's negligence, but entered since I was not one to complain. Once inside, my eyes frantically searched for Tenten as I peeked into every bench and secluded table. It seemed the damned woman had completely disappeared from me. My eyes continued to scan the area, intermittently studying the seats until they finally came to rest on her form…but she wasn't alone. In front of her were two figures sitting by the stools facing a bartender. One seemed to be hunched over, appearing almost unconscious, while the other was leaning back on the seat with a familiar looking orange book.

"Kakashi Sensei!" I called out and momentarily grabbed the group's attention. Both heads turned back around as though my voice had not been important.

I walked towards them, wondering why I had been so abruptly ignored, and noticed several empty sake bottles carelessly scattered about in front of them. Kakashi held a familiar cup in one hand as the other took the time to turn the next page in his book.

"Hello Sakura." He calmly greeted me behind the pervy sage's printed work. "Aren't you a little too young to be in here?"

"Never mind that." I dodged his question and stared at the hunched green clad shoulders in front of me. Something in the pits of my stomach plummeted down to my feet as my throat choked with a parched whimper. Never in my life had I expected to see one of Konoha's most venerated and most powerful ninja in this state. Gai stared down at his empty cup, looking listlessly at it as though it were the source of his predicament. His eyes possessed days of built up unrest and anxiety, his mouth which reluctantly greeted the bitter sake was pale and dour, sparing no smiles for anyone, not even his student.

I wondered if he even realized we were here.

"Gai Sensei…please forgive me…I've had…some problems in meeting you again." Tenten slowly apologized and gave a short bow. "I was being a foolish disciple to not have trusted you…I hope that you can-"

"How is…Lee?" his voice, lacking any life, nearly cracked when mentioning his once favorite pupil's name.

Tenten opened her mouth and slowly closed it, looking at me entreatingly for an answer.

"He's fine Gai Sensei." I replied in her place. "I talked to him and convinced him to get help…he's going to be okay." I hoped my assurance would at least bring a smile to the man's face.

He closed his eyes and pushed back his sake cup, looking disgusted. (I just prayed his reviling face was directed at the alcohol and not at my words.)

"It does not matter…my Lee is dead now."

His sentence was like being submerged in ice water.

"N-no he isn't! He is not _dead_!" I nearly screamed at him and astonished even myself at finding the gall to go against him. "How _DARE_ you lose hope in someone you once thought of as a _SON_!?"

My sensei and Tenten could only stare in surprise at me as I continued my harangue. Gai, however, remained stolid.

"Yes, Lee has changed, but he can get better! I _know_ that he still cares for you Sensei! He has just been through so much and the _LAST_ thing he needs is his precious people deserting him! If you leave him now…there's no telling _what_ he might do. But if you stay with him, support him, and above all, _cherish_ him…you will have your student back, I promise!" I practically beseeched Gai to reconsider his dire opinion of Lee.

The man said nothing, opting to give me silence instead of wasting his breath on me.

"Sakura," my Sensei cut me off before I could continue, "I think it's best you just let him fume about it for a while, you too Tenten." He set his book down, never letting his eyes desert the print, and took a sip from his own cup

Head hung low, I gave up and took a dejected Tenten's hand in my own, tugging it with me. I didn't matter what anyone else thought, I _would_ bring our Lee back. Gai would be back to grinning like a fool and making self rules in no time. He _had_ to.

"Sensei…I will see you later…Lee will see you as well." Tenten promised as I continued to jerk her arm towards me.

Gai turned around, merely glancing at both of us before reverting his attention to the empty sake bottles strewed about him.

"Please take care of him…he won't even look at me, but I'm sure he'll listen to you." He said as he strained to get up from his seat.

"Gai…don't overdo it." My teacher advised unworriedly as he continued to read his book. "You'll rip those stitches again…"

I smiled at him, wishing somehow to assure him of Lee's wellbeing. I wanted to give him _more_ than a smile, _more_ than caring words. The poor guy looked like he needed a _hug_ at this point. I searched my mind for something more to say, but found myself lacking anymore courage to even _look_ at Gai without breaking down myself. As I began to lament what petty comfort I had to offer, I failed to notice that I had tucked four of my fingers away and was sticking my thumb out. I was currently giving Gai a thumb's up.

'_Oh __**god**__…I'm doing the good guy pose.' _

I would have cringed had the situation not been so dismal.

I smiled warmly at him, set my hand down, and gave him a short respectful bow.

"I will give your student back to you. It's a promise!"

At my sudden pledge, I could have sworn that the tiniest of smiles dared to reach Gai's weary lips. He turned his attention back to his empty cup and continued to stare at it.

"Come on Tenten, let's go." I said as I pulled on her hand and broke into a sprint out of the bar.

'_I need to hurry…Lee might already be waiting for me._'

As we ran through the deserted streets something began to bother me. Something had _still_ not felt right…almost out of place. It was something that made my eye twitch in annoyance when I couldn't figure out what it had been.

I nearly tripped on some small pebbles the moment I realized what it was.

In the midst of making sense out of the current battered relationships Lee had, comforting the suffering team and sensei, and setting my priorities…I never even _ONCE_ stopped to notice something that I would have _killed_ to see since I was twelve years old.

Kakashi Sensei had had his mask off…

while drinking his sake.

'_DAMN!' _

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It was nearing night once Tenten and I managed to reach my neighborhood. Lanterns were lit and businesses were starting to close down, heightening my worry for making it to the therapist on time. A sliver of sunlight revived my hope once I saw my house. Lee was already sitting by the front stairs and waiting rather impatiently. It took all I had to tune out the chattering behind me coming from my friend. All through the short trip I had had the pleasure of listening to her flaunt how _SHE_ was the only one who had actually _SEEN_ my Sensei without his mask. Unfortunately, I was too absorbed in a morose Gai to have even notice him.

"Seriously Sakura…if only he were ten-_FIVE_ years younger I would grab him and-!"

"Tenten, seriously, I don't want to hear you fantasizing about my sensei, it-it's _gross_!" I exclaimed, trying to hide my jealousy at her discovery.

"We can buy him some sake next time and get him d-!"

"SHUT UP!" I tried to block the mental image she made me create.

I was starting to worry for her.

Lee's head rose to meet us at my sudden yell and looked at us as though we were insane.

"Something the matter?" he asked as he stood from the stairs.

"Just your sexually frustrated teammate." I muttered with a laugh as I dodged a smack from the girl.

Lee blinked, but decided not to further question us.

"Don't you want to know who she likes?" I continued to make Tenten's life miserable.

"Shut up Sakura! It's none of his business!" she tried to silence me by cupping her hand over my mouth.

All I had to do was just lick it in order for her to retrieve her hand with a disgusted feminine squeal.

He gave me another odd look, shook his head, and tucked one hand in his pocket.

"I know better than to pry into a conversation between two women." He explained as he reached for my hand with his free one.

A few minutes went by before I realized the three of us looked like idiots. Tenten still held on to my hand with her free one and Lee had gotten the other, making me feel like the mother between two children.

'_That or some sick three person couple._'

I had to chuckle at my tarnished mind.

"My apologies," Lee mumbled as he released my hand, "I forgot you and Tenten were…"

He hadn't even finished his sentence…he didn't _need_ to. The derisive smile he wore was enough to make me remember the day I had mistakenly wore her clothing instead of my own when she had slept at my house.

"Lee, you've gotten even _worse_ than Sakura!" my friend exclaimed with disgust as she automatically let go of my hand.

"I wouldn't be _talking_ Tenten, I'm not the one getting hot over a certain sens-" again her hand was clamped over my own to prevent me from spilling her secret.

"Lee don't listen to her!"

I had to laugh at the way she stared pleadingly at him to keep out of our "talks". It seemed...odd…almost _bizarre_ that they were acting like this. It was almost as if nothing had happened between them, like they were teammates, like they were…_friends_ again.

I could only wish that was the case.

"Oh, I do not intend to…but now my interest has grown."

"It's nothing really, I'm just teasing her." I assured before pushing Tenten toward Lee.

I wanted them to talk and get it over with lest I had to deal with a fight.

Plus, at that moment I suddenly felt as though I was unneeded…a hindrance to both of them that kept them from fully expressing themselves.

I slowly nodded my head at her, hinting to take the opportunity to talk, and took my leave as I walked several yards away from them. Although I knew I had to grant them privacy, it was so much more appealing to casually lean against a building and _pretend_ I didn't hear them and didn't _care_ what crossed their lips. From where I stood their words were like mere whispers. That only made me listen even _more_ fervently.

Tenten parted her lips and cleared her throat, trying to be the first to speak.

"Hey Lee?"

She seemed to be talking to the floor instead of his comrade judging from her lowered head.

"Yes?"

"I-I'm sorry about…you know-everything."

"There is no reason for you to apologize. Your reactions were only expectable after what we did to you."

"Just shut up and accept my apology, I don't want any justifications from you." She muttered, keeping her eyes away from his own.

Lee peered at her, trying to lower his head in order to get a better look at her. He finally got the hint when she took a step away from him. Apparently, she didn't want him to see her face. He cleared his throat and brought one hand to his hip, leaving the other free for something that brought a stinging sensation to my stomach.

"All right…I will accept yours…but only if you accept mine." He proposed and quickly tilted her chin up with the index finger of his free hand.

Something pestering me in the back of my mind nearly made me uncomfortable with their positions. I found myself fidgeting with my fingers and biting my lower lip as I saw the scene unfold at a distance. A tinge of an unwanted ache seemed to tint my chest, but I attempted in vain keep it at bay. From where I stood…I was no idiot…it appeared as thought they were…

in love.

The avaricious side of me almost regretted bringing Tenten with me, but I felt relieved I had. I shoved the feeling aside into the farthest corners of my consciousness and focused on something else beside the event in front of me.

'_They're just teammates…they're just teammates…they're just teammates…'_ my hopeless mantra did nothing to assuage my doubt for Lee.

I turned my body around and bit my tongue.

'_It-it's not like we were actually going out after all…it's not like…not like I'm really compatible with him…she's his age and probably a lot more mature than I'll ever be…' _

I came to the conclusion that I was probably a masochist since I couldn't shut my mind up.

"You're so…stupid…" I grumbled and randomly kicked at some rocks. "Stupid stupid stupid-"

"Who is stupid?" Lee's voice suddenly asked behind me.

I nearly jumped at his proximity, since his lips were uncomfortably close to my neck and ear. Tenten's laughter ran in the air.

"You're so jumpy Sakura." She teased.

"Yeah yeah…" I muttered. "So are we done here….got everything patched up?" I asked impatiently.

Lee exchanged looks with his teammate, nodded, but said nothing.

"Then let's go."

It had not been even a moment from when we had started to walk that I hastily turned a corner, trying to be the one to lead, and banged my head against something hard. My legs slipped, bringing me and my dignity to the ground. Fortunately, strong arms quickly enveloped me and jerked me back up before a blush could even grace my cheeks. I opened my eyes filled with humiliation at my clumsy actions, expecting Lee to be giving me his usual disparaging look. I instead had the pleasure to look up to meet stern lips and unforgiving omniscient eyes.

It seemed my sudden collision had been against none other than a certain Hyuga prodigy.

'_Great…just great.' _

"Hello Sakura." He said dully.

"Hello Neji." I repeated his greeting and reluctantly (but appreciatively) accepted his hands keeping me from kissing the granite floor.

It wasn't long before the team was reunited once more.

My friends' rapid footsteps caught up to me.

"Why must you always _insist_ on running off Sakura? You really must be more careful if you do n-" Lee's voice was silenced as his eyes finally made contact with the person who had saved me from my fall.

Both men stood erect, neither willing to budge in front of the other. I swore that even their chests stilled their inhalation in fear of showing any vulnerability in their movement. Lee's eyes slowly narrowed, lingering at his teammate's stern face but quickly scrutinizing his hands which still held on to me. Allowing me no time to react, I was brought back into Lee's possession when my arm was gently jerked toward his direction. For a moment I thought I saw a trace of protectiveness in those dark eyes…or perhaps it was a feeling that was not at all different from the one I had experienced earlier.

Whatever it had been…

it was riveting.

"Are you all right?" he whispered, but gave me no time to answer as he tenderly pushed me and Tenten behind him.

For the first time in years I felt like I was being protected.

"What do you want Neji?" his question itself sounded like a threat.

"I wanted to see where you were obviously…"

"Well…you have found me. Now leave."

"Not until you tell me where you were last night."

Although this was _hardly_ the time for hilarity with such an ominous situation, I fought the urge to laugh when Neji said this. I knew it was a fool's decision to act derisively in the face of the Hyuga, but I couldn't help to at _least_ snicker. Half of me was expecting him to continue by saying "I was worried _sick_ about you!" or "I stayed up all night _waiting_ for you!" or "Is there another person I don't know about!?"

Neii was such a girl sometimes, I swore. He almost sounded like a wife.

"I was at Sakura's house." He answered candidly.

"Until morning?"

"That is none of your concern."

"It is when I'm supposed to be watching over you." His voice, though chilling, lacked the antipathy that Lee's spewed. It sounded almost…worried.

"I am no child."

"Then stop acting like one."

"Then I suppose _you_ act like a complete a-"

"Hey!" Tenten wisely intervened as she appeared in front of Lee, "Knock it off!"

Both men shot her a menacing look as she got between them.

"This has nothing to do with you _Tenten_." Neji seethed, continuing his famous glare. "This is between Lee and-"

"Oh, there you go again Neji! Have you _EVER _stopped to consider anyone _else's_ feelings or opinions on this matter? It's always been you you _you_!" Tenten screamed back and nearly made me cringe with her berating tone.

I could only watch the quarrel as a bystander, an innocent civilian who had just been caught in the crossfire. I heard the oncoming insults and allegation before me as though I were watching a ball in a tennis match.

"I can't believe you still won't get over that childish grudge you have Tenten. There was nothing you could have done anyway." Neji quickly explained and brushed off her comments.

Lee hands nearly rose in exasperation. "She had a _right_ to know though Neji!…_You_ and _Gai_ knew…why was _she_ any different?"

"Then why didn't _you_ tell her?" he asked, never leaving his teammate's eyes lest he lost his weakness.

Lee was finally the first to give in as he turned his head aside, appearing ashamed of something. "You know why I could not tell her Neji…you of _all_ people should know!"

"Because you were afraid of what she would think, because you were afraid of being shunned by her, because you didn't TRUST her enough to tell her." If Neji's objective was to make Lee crack under the pressure…he was succeeding.

"THAT is not true Neji! I-I…I DO trust Tenten, I just didn't know what her reaction would be and she-" Lee was silenced with a rather harsh cuff to his head by his female companion.

"Stop talking about me as though I'm not here!" she yelled at both bickering men. "The truth of the matter is that NEITHER one of you had the decency to tell me anything and completely shut me out!"

"Why did you hit only _me_? I am actually on _your_ side and Neji-!"

Tenten quickly smacked the Hyuga's forehead as though to quell Lee's outrage.

By this time I had to laugh at the way they were fighting. It was similar, if not WORSE, than how _my_ team fought (at least I rarely slugged BOTH my teammates.) Giving Naruto his daily beatings was a different matter. The trio turned to face me as I clamped my mouth shut in a vain attempt to muffle the laughter. Their expressions were as different as their views in the squabble. Neji's right eye twitched, Tenten shot me a dirty look, and Lee's eyes looked like they wanted to kill me where I stood.

"Y-you guys…" I nearly cackled, "you guys look so funny right now! Y-you l-look like some brats from the academy fighting!"

At my remark their expressions suddenly changed.

Neji turned his face sideways to completely ignore me, looking as if I was of no importance. Lee's hand slowly traveled to his hip while the other rubbed the back of his neck as he stared at the ground. Tenten's look eventually dissipated as she looked back at her teammates and then at me. Her facial expression told me she wanted to laugh, but didn't know if the situation even called for it. I continued to laugh and point at Tenten as she fought the impulse to laugh as well. Her lips curved into a smile and gave out a silent giggle. A few moments passed before she cupped her mouth, realizing she was starting to laugh as hard as I was.

"W-we do…don't we?" she agreed as she glanced at the men again. "I-I don't think I've hit them since we were _genin_!"

"If I recall, you slapped me just _yesterday_ Tenten." Neji corrected with an irked face as he crossed his arms. He was never one to laugh anyway.

Lee followed suit by eventually giving a slight smile at their juvenile behavior.

"You _slapped_ Neji? What did he say?" he asked curiously.

"He just kind of stared at me like an idiot like he usually does." Tenten answered while still giggling.

"Or perhaps he was just so stunned that someone actually caught him off guard?" Lee's questioned seemed aimed at his rival as he quirked an interested eyebrow.

Neji decided not to comment on the matter and turned his body around.

"I will be waiting at the Hyuga household whenever you stop acting like complete fools." He stated calmly before walking away.

"W-wait up Neji!" Tenten exclaimed as she clung to her sides from the amusement and ran after him. (Her hunched and running form made me picture Naruto whenever he was in need of a bathroom and there was not one in sight.)

"I-I'm sorry okay? I-I'm s-sorry for slapping you." She began as she began to quiet herself. "You're just…you're just so mean sometimes."

"I am not _mean_, you simply decided to misinterpret my intentions."

"Yeah, okay, so do you forgive me?"

"No." he dryly replied and continued to walk away.

By this time I suspected this was Neji's way of sulking around his teammates.

"Oh come on! Don't be that way!" she exclaimed as she pouted and followed him. She momentarily glanced at us and waved a farewell. "I'll see you two tomorrow, Neji's just sulking."

"I am not sulking." Came the stolid reply.

"Yes you _are_!"

I continued to laugh even as their forms finally retreated to mere shadows against the light of lanterns. This left Lee and I alone.

"Thank you Sakura." He mumbled as he offered me his hand.

"For what? All I did was laugh." I said sheepishly and accepted it.

"Well, I suppose that was all we really needed." He pointed out with a shrug.

"What the three of you needed was to blow off some steam. Don't worry…you will all be back to normal soon enough."

We smiled at each other as Lee squeezed my hand.

"You ready to meet the therapist?" I asked.

"Sure." He answered confidently. "What do I have to lose by going?"


	25. Anomalous Actions and Introductions

"Wh-where's Tenten

Hello alo again everyone! Again, for what seems the 25th time, I must thank you for all your wonderful and helpful reviews! Thank you for all of those _new_ reviewers as well, there is nothing better than meeting new readers! Anyway, I hope that all of you have been well and had a great and safe spring break (or WILL have, in my case.) And again, I must apologize for my late update (I think this is the longest I've taken.) I try to type as fast as I can, but there is always this pile of work from college giving you the evil eye in the corner of your room. I hate it, but I still love college and all its experiences! I hope you all enjoy this chapter (I am a bit paranoid about it right now) because I tried condensing it so it wouldn't seem so…dull and long. Thank you for those who pointed that out since I fasten the pace. This has also been the most I've written, over 40ish pages. I hope it is satisfactory and makes up for the wait. Anywho, thank you all again, I would have abandoned this story if it were not for your reviews since YOU keep this thing alive. So, again…Read, Enjoy, and Recommend!

**Anomalous Actions and Introductions **

"_Well good afternoon Lee"' _

"_Good afternoon." _

"_How are you feeling today?" _

"_All right I suppose." _

"_Why do you 'suppose'?" _

"_I do not know." _

"_How has you day been going so far?" _

"_Fairly well…I actually managed to __**eat**__ breakfast today." _

"_That is wonderful news. Progress in appetite is an important feat in your recuperation.' _

"_The pills you have given me have not exactly been assisting me to get through that ordeal though."_

"_Oh?" _

"_I have not slept well." _

"_Ah. Is that really the cause of the pills or is there something __**else**__ bothering you?" _

The banter seemed to come to an edgy halt for the first time since I had started listening. Lee's calm even breaths could barely be heard as he either contemplated on giving an answer or nothing at all.

"_I've heard you don't like medication." _

"_More like HATE it, there is nothing worse than having to take it." _

"_Well, we all have our dislikes. What DO you like Lee?" _

"_Nothing."_

"_Very well,"_ the session continued with the poised voice, _"What __**else**__ do you dislike?" _

"_When Neji is an asshole." _

There were about thirty seconds of silence before the older man cleared his throat. The random profanity had not sat well apparently.

"_M-hm, tell me about this… __**Neji**__." _

"_No." _

"_All right then…is he your brother?" _

A scoff was heard followed by a short derisive chuckle.

"_Hardly…he is my teammate." _

"_Ah, is he your __**only**__ teammate?" _

Another unbearable silence drowned the room.

"_No…there is Tenten…and m-our instructor Gai." _

The terse answer was given with what I thought was a sense of hesitancy.

"_Hm, would you like to talk about your teacher?" _

"_No." _

More silence.

"_Is Tenten a female companion?" _

"_Yes…she specializes in weaponry." _

"_**Weaponry**__ you say?' _the voice sounded interested. _' I take it she must be a very strong and disciplined woman then?" _

A breath was drawn as Lee mulled over the question.

"_Perhaps she is a little __**too**__ strong." _

"_What do you mean? Is she abusive?" _

"_Well, no." _there was a small laugh. _"at least not physically…well most of the time." _

"_How long have you known her?" _

"_Since I was a student at the academy, we never really hung out together until she was chosen to be in my team." _

"_Ah, and are you two involved amorously by any chance?" _

"_No!"_

The voice sounded almost insulted.

I could only smile.

"_Why did you get so offended?" _

"_Because Tenten was never the one who….the one who is interested in me." _

"_Ah." _

The tape was halted, leaving me to wonder what Lee had meant to say.

"And _that_…is an example of his first few weeks of therapy. He was always so reserved at first." An old man who was probably older than the third Hokage and fifth Hokage _combined_ said.

This decrepit man, whose nearly blind eyes could read one's consciousness like an unfurled scroll, whose bony fingers wavered with every sip of tea he took, was the therapist I had asked to help with Lee's endeavors. He scratched his balding head and leaned back comfortably on his ample leather couch, pondering about the odd conversation that had been recorded.

"What exactly are you doing with him right now?" I asked uneasily as I shifted in my seat.

"Can you not tell? You've made me assume you were adroit with this sort of study." He said with a cough.

"I'm a medic, not a psychiatrist." 

The man sighed and rubbed his hands together, the friction preparing him to explain this to a clueless girl.

"Very well…it is a form of therapy in which the patient voices whatever is on his mind…triviality, discomfort, and randomness of the thought is something that matters not. I suppose…the generic term used for this in lectures is 'free association'." He grumbled as he took his cup and sipped at his tea. "It is something all _novice_ psychology students should know." He added needlessly.

"Ah. But what does it _do_ exactly?" I asked, taking the time to stare at my own deserted drink.

"It helps unearth some hidden feelings, emotions, or memories he may have on his mind but has repressed."

"How does _that_ help?"

"You just heard for yourself didn't you?"

"No, I didn't. All I heard was him sulking around you like there was no tomorrow." I answered dryly.

"I would like for you to listen to this tape that was recorded just _last_ week…progress has been prolific and I think we've finally had a breakthrough." He grabbed another tape and began to talk again as though he had not heard my last comment.

"What do you mean?"

"Shh." The wise frail man pressed the play button with his quaking finger.

"_How are you feeling today?" _

"_A bit worse thank you." _

"_Worse? Oh my. Was it Neji again?" _

"_He is always telling me what to do, what I should eat, what I should wear, how I should even __**breathe**__!" _

"_Seems to me like he is the protective kind." _

"_More like a bothersome mother." _

"_Or an…older brother…perhaps?" _

Lee's stifled response was interrupted by an uneasy cough. The screeching of a chair being pushed against a hard surface dominated the tape. Had his realization shocked him that much?

"_I have no brothers…"_

"_Oh well I don't mean biologically…but everything he says to you seems to bother you…you two fight almost constantly and you're a bit of a rival to him." _

"_Rivalry…oh the sheer stupidity of it." _

"_Well, rivalry cannot be all __**that**__ bad. It builds up healthy competition as well as pushes one to be better." _

"_Shut up, shut up, you are sounding just like him." _

"_Like Neji? But he seems like such a nice lad, why don't you try being a bit more patient with him?" _

"_Because he makes me DO things I dislike! He makes me feel like I actually __**deserve**__ a family!" _

"_Everyone deserves love and attention-"_

"_STOP SAYING THAT! I DO NOT! You…you make me __**feel**__ things DAMN IT ALL!" _The screeching voice nearly shook the tape itself.

"_Why?" _

"_Because…because I will never be worth your affections…I am useless." _

"_Oh but you ARE worthy of them and-"_

"_STOP SAYING OTHERWISE! WHY ARE YOU ALWAYS LIKE THAT?...Why?...Several years ago you would not have told me the time of day….you would…would not have allowed me the pleasure of a conversation! And NOW…now…oh DAMN IT ALL!" _

"_Why do you 'damn it all' Lee?" _

"_Because you are always PUSHING me! I hate you for that! I HATE YOU FOR STEALING WHAT WAS MINE AND MINE ALONE!" _

His screeching accusations nearly made me want to turn off the tape. The man firmly held his hand over the recorder, never allowing me to get close to it. I suppose I _needed_ to hear this…not matter how much pain it was causing me.

"_M-hm…why do you hate me?" _the calm voice seemed to contradict Lee's.

"_YOU SAY THESE….THESE THINGS TO ME! WHY DO YOU TALK TO ME AS THOUGH I WERE YOUR-!" _

"_Your what?" _the stoic man's voice echoed against the diatribe currently erupting in the room.

"_YOUR DAMN BROTHER! YOUR-!...your damn…brother…" _Lee's breaths were ragged and sluggish as he finally regained composure.

The inside of my ears ached, my jaw was clamped shut and trembling, and I felt my eyes burning with the wish to release hot briny tears. Had Lee finally cracked under the pressure of the psychiatrist? My mind subconsciously created an image of a drained boy finally admitting defeat as his knees crushed against the hard floor. I could feel his eyes piercing through the old man, wishing him ill will.

"_I…hate you…and yet…I care about you all…throughout all the things I scream at you and throw at you…you still come back…why?" _

"_Because they care about you unconditionally." _

"_You do not…I was always…__**second**__ best for you…" _

He stopped the tape again, never allowing me a second for private reflection. The man rubbed his temples and blew at his steaming tea. "He inadvertently tells me something that is somehow related to his predicaments. The assumption that it's directed at _me_, is false. "

"Well, I heard him screaming his lungs out at you-"

"Not at _me_, rather…at his friends…his father…_**you**_."

I choked on the scathing liquid being sipped and set the cup down, apparently shocked from his conclusion.

"What do you mean?" I asked, biting my burnt lip.

"I presumed that what he said was directed at someone he knew…and it is not necessarily any _one_ person. One thing I am sure of is that what he said was not meant for _me_, I hardly know the boy. This is what free association is all about Sakura." He explicated the puzzling matter to me.

I, meanwhile, had decided to fidget with the spoon in my cup, trying to comprehend the conclusion this antediluvian man had come to. It was also very possible he had finally gone senile and was just fabricating this stuff up in that weird mind of his. Even Lady Tsunade had warned me against taking Lee to be treated by him. He had worked wonders with _other_ ninja in the village who had had similar difficulties in coping. (The fact that he had owed me a favor ever since I had gotten him some rare herbs from a mission had _nothing_ to do with it.)

"Sakura, stop looking me as though I am telling you deceptions. These are my honest conjectures." He rebuked like a grandfather scolded his grandchildren.

I continued to nibble on my lip and left the spoon alone, not wanting to believe that his speculation had been correct…there _had_ been various persons whom Lee's words could be aimed at.

"Th-the…when he screamed something…a-about feeling like a brother…could he have been thinking of Neji when he said this?" I chose my words carefully and slowly lest I had assumed wrong.

He nodded in appreciation. "Exactly…Sakura my dear, you are not as insipid as you look when it comes to this field."

"Th-thanks?" I didn't know whether to take it as a compliment or not.

"And who do you think he was thinking of when he mentioned '_second_ best' and not giving him 'the time of day'?" he asked with a warm toothless smile.

I swallowed and forced down the lump of discomfort lodged in my throat when I realized both of us knew the answer. My neck seemed eerily sore as I looked into his grey listless eyes.

"Me."

He nodded again and rose from his seat.

"Lee only agreed to record his sessions because I told him it would help with his progress…of course I am sworn to secrecy to never tell a soul about what _else_ we talk about but…" he coughed and opened the door, motioning that this meeting was over. "He agreed to let you to hear them."

"Thank you." I said, somewhat relieved I was free from this imprisonment.

"Thank _Lee_…he was the one who allowed me to show you this." He remarked as he rudely rushed me through the door with his hand behind my back. "Oh… one last thing Sakura…before I forget."

"Yes?" I asked while attempting to not lose my footing.

The old man's face was stern as he opened his dry lips to verbalize his thoughts. He closed his eyes and scratched his ashen beard all while I waited in anticipation. With him, there was no sliver of comfort neither in his voice nor face once I heard his warning.

"I would be more concerned about his state of mind rather than just his health."

"What do you mean?"

"He always seems to be pinning for something…I would be rather wary of his actions if I were you." He warned. "Also…I would make sure not to let him leave on any missions anytime soon…tell Lady Hokage that."

I could only stare at him in perplexity as I tried to make sense of his warnings. The aged doctor sighed and pushed me out of his office.

"I have good reason to believe he might try to kill himself."

A "friendly" slam of the door ended our conversation.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"So how was it?"

"Just lovely, we shared tea."

"He is quite odd is he not?"

"Shut up." I demanded as we exited the tall building. "_**Odd**_ doesn't _begin_ to describe it. He's _living_ proof that fossils were once alive."

Lee only grinned and poked the middle of my forehead with his index finger, adding to my irked disposition.

"But he is also very nice." He pointed out.

"He made me feel like a total _idiot_ just because I'm not a _genius_ in every field of study!" I exclaimed.

"Well…you should have _some_ background in psychology since you are a medic and all-"

"Spare me, I treat broken bones and ripped tendons, not a screwed up mind like yours."

"This is doing _wonders_ for my recuperation." The boy answered dryly as he continued to walk beside me.

We soon came across a park littered with trees, bars, and slides bearing vigorous children. I thought it pleasant when I realized it had been one where I had spent most of my afternoons in when I was young. Swings oscillated lazily with the playful wind of spring while blossoms rained on our heads and agitated out noses. I tried not to laugh whenever restless academy students defied death each time they fell on their heads from the monkey bars. I wiped a bothersome morsel of pollen caught in my eyes and studied the children with a sense of nostalgia. Lee's hand rubbing my shoulder tore me from my thoughts as I gave my attention to him. I licked my arid lips and braced the inevitable subject.

"Lee…I listened to some of your sessions today…thank you for…you know."

He immediately lost contact with my skin as though it had scathed him. If my gratification had stirred something within him he allowed me no signs of it.

"I figured you would bother me about it sooner or later…that is the only reason I allowed you to listen to something so private."

I nodded my head and motioned to sit down underneath a shady ficus tree. My mind was praying against all odds that we would not end up fighting.

"So how are your sessions coming along recently?" I asked as I pulled up random weeds from the luscious grass.

"Oh, I found out my psychiatrist is a genius." He answered before settling down beside me and leaning against the tree's broad trunk.

"Is he?"

"Yes, it only took him several _months_ to realize that my relationship with my father _MIGHT_ have something to do with my problems. Of course, this is only speculation." He joked and pulled out a notebook plastered with protection and shielding notes from a backpack he had been carrying.

I had to laugh at his stark sarcasm. Only Lee could take such a grim matter so lightly.

"And how about the expressive writing sessions that he advised?"

He flipped through the pages, all copious with his handwriting. "They have helped a great deal, now instead of just _screaming_ at Neji I _write_ about how much of an idiot he is."

"Does that help?"

"Yes, it is rather entertaining watching him become irritated when even _he_ cannot see through the notebook with all the barrier notes I placed around it." He said with a laugh as his mind probably reminisced the memories.

"Sounds like fun."

"Tons."

The coerced chitchat seemed to droll on forever for me as I tried to resurface the horrid topic that involved Lee's insecurity over our relationship (if we even _had_ one that is.) We had not kissed, we rarely touched, and I considered myself fortunate if he even _smiled_ at me the same way men did at pretty girls around the village as they walked together hand in hand. I would never carp about it to him though, there was no need. Hastening _any_ part of our relationship would bring about ruin and discomfort, that much I knew. As much as I loathed it, I had promised myself I would refrain from ravaging him (despite how much I wanted to) until he had finished his therapy.

Each day seemed endless and torturous.

"Lee…" I took a profound breath and stared at him eye to eye, "you know I'm helping you because I really care for you right?"

"I suppose." He answered, already appearing uncomfortable with the subject as he folded his arms over his chest.

"And…if I didn't care for you…I would have gone out with someone else the minute they had taken an interest towards me right?" I meandered around the subject.

"I know you are talking about Sasuke, there is no need for you to hide it." He flatly stated as he recalled my reserved teammate.

"Lee!" I rebuked, "I listened to your sessions and you know what? They really _hurt_ me. If you _really_ were second best, I would have gone out with Sasuke long ago. Why do you think I ignored him and started hanging out with you?"

"Sex?"

By now I knew Lee was just making fun of me with our favorite subject.

"Yes Lee…I'm a total nymphomaniac…" I mumbled, my visage and voice showing the upmost sarcasm. "I had Naruto and Sasuke and then I wanted _you_." I added with a glare.

Lee had to laugh at my dour mood. "You are so easy to tease." he said as he ruffled my hair as though I were his younger sibling (another act I despised.)

"Yeah, it's also very easy to make me punch your nose to the back of your skull…want to see?"

"No thank you, Naruto tells me it is not very pleasant."

Lee rose from his spot on the tree and extended his hand towards me to accept. I hesitantly allowed the contact and was effortlessly pulled to my feet. A smile tugged at my lips as I swatted away any stray grass that clung to my legs and rear. It had been some time since Lee had come to my house (a strict scolding from Neji about his behavior had caused Lee to be more prudish around me than usual.) As if reading my mind, Lee returned the smile and picked at some leaves caught in my hair.

"What are you thinking about _now_ Sakura?" he asked, cocking his head to the side in sweet puzzlement.

I nibbled on the inside of my cheek, wondering how I could persuade him.

"Do you want to go to my house? I'm sure you're hungry right?" I proposed all while being ignorant of his reaction.

A dash of scarlet ran through Lee's face when I asked this. He tucked one of his hands inside the pocket of his dark pants and offered his free one to me as he continued to smile.

"I do not mind cooking for you if that is what you mean, but I fear it is a different _kind_ of appetite that _you_ need to quell." He said with a chuckle.

It was _my_ blood's turn to rush to my face.

"You think more about sex than you'd like to admit Lee." I teased before I accepted his hand and began to walk.

"Only because I have started spending more time with you since _you_ are the one who is most obsessed with that subject."

"Shut up Lee." I said as I playfully smacked the back side of his head and laughed. "Although…if you wanted to go home with me right now…and if anything happened…I wouldn't exactly complain you know?" I insinuated as I squeezed his hand.

An interesting idea ventured into my mind as we continued to walk towards my house. Would we ever really? Would there ever really be a day in our lives when we would embrace one another, doff our clothes from our bodies, and lie in bed together? I had to laugh at the miniscule possibility of that happening. Lee was PROPER. He was ascetic to the point of frustration whenever I even _thought_ of kissing him. The manner in which he held me against his chest, the way his lips teased my own before I even had _contact_ with them, the idiosyncrasy of playfully caressing my back before robbing me of any further pleasure. All these horrendous acts of "passion" were what had led me to the brink of madness whenever I thought about him. Lee gave me physical adoration...just...never enough to satisfy whatever void I had within me that yearned to be filled. I hated that about him...just hated it.

"I wouldn't complain at _all_."

Lee stopped in his tracks, looked at me in shock, and pulled me back.

"Sakura do not…do not say things like that."

"Why?"

"This…this thing between us…how can you be so sure it will last? For all we know we might break up in a year, month-_tomorrow_! How can you make decisions like that so casually?" he asked, desperately trying to find the reason behind my hasty words.

"Lee…why are you so intent on this thing whenever we bring it up?" I asked jadedly.

"Because I want you to have sex only when you are married and _ready_!"

"Well, that is YOUR opinion," I said defensively before I pulled away from his touch, "if two people love each other and use precautions, then there shouldn't be a problem."

"But what if those precautions are not enough Sakura? What then?"

I pressed my lips together, getting annoyed from his preaching.

"Lee…if you want to wait until you're married then that's fine, that's _your_ opinion. I just don't like the way you keep pushing your ideals in my face."

"I am not _pushing_ them on you Sakura!" he exclaimed. "I am just amazed that a girl your age can even _think_ like this!"

"'A girl my age'?" I mocked, "I'm not some little girl anymore Lee, I can make my _own_ damn decisions and create my _own_ beliefs!"

"I am not questioning your intelligence, it is your _maturity_ that baffles me and-" the rest of Lee's words fell on deaf ears as I began to walk away from him.

I hated it when he got like this.

"Sakura, wait!" he exclaimed once he realized I was no longer giving him any of my attention. "You are such a child sometimes! Sakura! Listen to me!" he advised before gently pulling at one of my arms. "You are still very young…you might love me today but maybe a man that is better suited will come your way and-"

"I don't _WANT_ another man stupid, I want _you_!" I snapped back as I wrung free from his hold. "When are you going to get that through your _head_!?" I begged.

"Sakura, look at me…I-I am not fit to even _be_ with you! We fight all the time and you will get tired of me eventually and-"

I practically threw him off balance as I wrapped my arms around his waist. His trembling hands lied stationary at his sides, never once reaching up to cup my cheek or return the embrace.

"I will _never_ get tired of you Lee." I assured. "If anything, I'm afraid that _you_ will leave me first."

"_What_? No-I would never do that." He said in disbelief. "Sakura,…I cannot…I cannot afford to lose you again."

"But what if some other 'more suitable' girl comes your way? Someone who can cook, who isn't as foulmouthed, and _wants_ to stay abstinent?" I asked, arching a brow.

"Then I would send her off with Neji or some other man." He answered. "I am happy with you, even if you do not believe it."

"Are you sure? _You_ won't get bored of me?"

"How can I get bored of you when you are so unpredictable?" he asked with a grin before kissing my forehead. "Sakura, why are you always in such a hurry? I am not going anywhere you know."

Somehow contented with this answer, I took his hand in mine and continued to walk.

The crisis had been averted once more.

But it was just _one_ of the many we encountered during the day.

"Well, _you're_ no fun." I grumbled.

The jerk merely chuckled in return. "I will do anything with you, but unfortunately, _sex_ is out of the question."

My mind rambled at the possibilities.

"Sleep at my house with your shirt off tonight."

"Done."

I nearly ripped the tendons in Lee's arm while I ran home and pulling him.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

My hands shook as I opened the door to my house once we reached it, my mind intermitting each time I thought about sleeping next to a shirtless man. A blush stained my entire body when I made plans to rip off all the buttons and throw him against my bed. I nearly drooled as I imagined his warm body against mine, when I felt him shift under the covers, his frenzied heart as I trailed my hands over his chest, his throat gulping in tension as I kissed it, his furtive chuckles as I whispered in his ear, and his frightened expression when he realized I had begun to kiss his lips for the first time in months. I was relieved when the door flung open…but grew confused when I noticed the credit did not go to my house key.

"Hello Sakura!" A man who I faintly recognized stood facing me in front of the door and lifted me into his arms, holding me in a death hug. I panicked and would have fallen off him in the process if had he not set me back down. His eyes scanned me from my feet to my head and processed my physical appearance. "My _GOD_ look how you've grown! You've-!…you've gotten a bit fat." The man stared blankly at me from in front of the door and scrutinized my figure. "What have you _eaten_ while I was gone? _Lard_?"

"D-d-dad?" I asked, utterly shocked, but wondered why I had such horrid luck.

"How many months has it been? Too long I say!" he laughed as he violently scratched the top of my head and left my hair in disaster.

His robust chest nearly exploded with laughter as he continued to get pleasure from torturing me in front of Lee. His jokes were forced to draw to an end as he finally realized I was not alone. It had taken him quite some time, but my genius of a father cocked his head to the side of me and stared at Lee with an interested gaze. The boy behind me stiffened his posture and cleared his throat, sensing my father's eyes. My father walked past me and curiously absorbed Lee's presence with wariness.

"Hello, and who's your friend?" he asked with a smile that made me cringe.

'_Oh god…he's going to __**start**__.' _

Lee, being the courteous _wonderful_ boy that he was, stepped closer to him and gave a deferential bow.

"Hello sir, my name is Lee, I am a friend of your daughter." he explained as he held out his hand in formal greeting.

"Oh, well, it's nice to meet you too…" he replied before shaking Lee's hand. I stared at the scene in front of me suspiciously, being aware of my dad's movements and facial expressions as he greeted Lee. He smiled at him and turned his attention back to me while shaking his head.

"Sakura, have you not being training? I could have _sworn_ that training with Lady Tsunade would have at _least_ burned a few pounds and-oh-I'm Sakura's father by the way!" He added rather obviously even after I had _addressed_ him and we had been standing on the porch for a few long moments. To add further emphasis on his relation towards me, he somehow found it _necessary_ to point his index finger at himself.

Meanwhile, I contemplated ways to kill my father once Lee was gone.

"Dad…what are you doing here again?" I asked, rubbing my temples in agitation and embarrassment.

"I…_live_ here? Oh well, I met up with your mother while I was on a break from my mission and we decided to head home together to see you! Wasn't that _nice_?!" he asked as though it would be the highlight of my day.

"Yes, very." I answered irreverently as I walked past him to enter the house.

"Aren't you going to introduce your boyfriend to you mother? Or are you going to leave him standing by our porch?" he teased with a berating tone.

The rare aroma of cooking captivated my senses as I walked inside and thought it wise to simply ignore my father's last comment.

"He's not my boyfriend and yes, she has already met him." I snarled as I stomped back out again, grabbed an unsuspecting Lee's arm, and nearly ripped it out of its socket once more as I pulled him inside the house.

"Get in here." I practically ordered.

Lee had no choice but to comply with a pained expression.

"MOM! I'M HOME!" I yelled while poking my head inside the living room and kitchen.

The woman was no where to be found as the only thing that greeted me was a pot filled with some sort of concoction boiling lazily by the stove. Air that had once been tinted with the scent of grass and nature was now overwhelmed with a mixture of spices and piquant ingredients that nearly burned my nose as I breathed. I began to cough as the fiery smell made me choke and watered my eyes. I looked over at my father who only smiled sheepishly and walked toward the pot to stir its contents. His cooking had never been as grotesque as my mother's, but there was just _something_ about his culinary skills that made me want to pump my stomach out as soon as I was done eating his food.

"Sakura, what have you been _living_ on!? There's nothing but chips, ramen, and soda in your room and kitchen!" he rebuked playfully as he tasted the meal. "Lee, have you been watching over my girl? You've done a horrible job at keeping her from caching her junk food." He added, hoping to discomfit the man beside me.

Lee, however, appeared at stolid as when he had entered the house and crossed his arms.

"I try to, but she is a rather…picky eater." He responded as his eyes quickly glanced at me.

"I am NOT!" I exclaimed while resisting the urge to snap his arms in half.

"Yes, she can be quite difficult to feed." He concurred as though I was some _livestock_. "Did Sakura know we were coming? Is that why she brought you over?"

"Y-YES I DID!" I slapped Lee in the back to stop him from opening his mouth.

My father's mouth widened in understanding from my answer, but said nothing even while Lee tried to rub his injured back. "Oh well then, would you like to stay for dinner Lee?" he asked, giving us both a curious look.

I automatically waved my hands in refusal, (I'd be damned if my parents used this invitation as a pretext to make me utterly miserable.) "No-he was just about to lea-!"

"Dinner sounds lovely," Lee interrupted my panicked answer with his collected and polite voice. "I would love to get to know you and your wife better sir."

'_DAMN!' _

It seemed even _Lee_ wanted to trample my dignity.

"I hope you like _curry_!" my father exposed the identity of the mystery food with gusto. He looked at me expecting to find a thrilled smile but instead met with a livid face on my part.

"I _hate_ spicy food." I spat out, sulking as I sat myself by the table.

"I love spicy food, especially curry." It seemed the older boy adored expressing the exact opposite of what I was feeling.

"Well, you'll love _this_ curry then!" my father rejoined with Lee and treated what I had said as a triviality. "A nice old lady in the Country of River gave me some to go…I don't know if it will taste the same once reheated though!"

A mysterious smile crept at Lee's lips as my dad said this. What had caused this odd reaction from him was unknown to me, but I thought it wise to brush it away.

He was getting on my nerves anyway.

"Did you sir? How was the lady running the place?"

My father tapped the bottom of his chin and looked up at the ceiling with a pensive expression. "Fine I suppose…she's always hitting these two kids though…probably her pupils by the looks of it."

Lee's smile grew even wider and soon looked as though it would stretch to the end of his cheeks. It had been months since I had seen his lips do such an act and I started to wonder if I should ask him about it eventually.

"That stuff was so good that we decided to take some home before we left!" my mother's airy voice crept from the living room as we heard her footsteps coming down the stairs.

Lee's grin immediately faltered as he turned to face my mother. She appeared relaxed and revitalized as she entered the kitchen, giving me a bothersome peck on the forehead before moving on to my dad. It took her a few moments to realize there was another person in the room. Her eyes lit up when she noticed who it was.

I often wondered how my mother got through her day.

"Oh _hello_ Lee! I didn't know _you_ were here!" she exclaimed as she heightened my mortification by _hugging_ Lee as though he were one of the family.

The boy looked rather traumatized and tense as memories from her _last_ embrace probably ran through his mind. His complaisant nature was the only thing keeping him from ripping himself apart from the affectionate woman. I was compelled to endure the sight before me while trying my hardest not snicker at his expression. The idiot was far too kind to object to my mother's touch, but his trembling legs and frenzied eyes told me he was in a state of privation from control.

"I-I-I am fine ma'am. It..i-it is lovely to see you again." He muttered his answer through a flustered face.

"Well, I'm so happy to hear that, I was beginning to wonder when you'd pay us a visit again!" She chirped in that saccharine voice of hers.

I managed to see my father's rolling eyes as he turned the stove off and began to serve rice on some plates.

"Is the food done? Should we sit down? You will join us won't you Lee? You have to!" My mother's incessant supplications did not go unnoticed by Lee.

"Of course ma'am, I have wanted to meet your husband for quite some time!" he answered with an amicable smile.

I was about to open my mouth to say something, but found myself in shock as I stared in horror when my father dumped something that looked like black bubbling lava on my plate. It almost looked _alive_ from the way it viciously gurgled and hissed. I would have been content with plain rice if I'd known I had to force this alien food down my throat.

"Try it Sakura, stop being such a 'picky eater'." My father copied Lee's term as he aggravated my mood by slapping a _second_ helping of the dreadful curry on my already drowning rice. The white grain was now nonexistent.

"I'm NOT _picky_! I just don't want to _poison_ myself!" I excused my unique palate and shoved the plate several inches away from me as though the substance was toxic. (In this case, it probably was.)

"It is actually quite good Sakura, I have tried it several times." Lee coaxed while he pushed my mother's chair in as she took her seat. "Naruto tried it as well…but I cannot be certain of his…reactions." He added with a smile.

"Naruto? Is _he_ your boyfriend?" my father asked as he served himself a rather generous helping of the curry and braced himself with several jugs of water. "You are quite popular Sakura."

One of my veins on my head burst.

"He is…my _teammate_ dad…not every guy I _KNOW_ is my boyfriend." I corrected menacingly and wondered if it was possible to fatally stab myself with a spoon to spare me anymore humiliation.

"Oh…all…right then." He said, oblivious or indifferent to my flushed face, and began to scarf down his food as if it was the most delicious thing he'd ever eaten. .

I gave him an uneasy look warning him to keep silent in front of Lee. My father merely shrugged and continued to eat. I felt Lee's inquisitive eyes rest on me as I stared at my meal with the same zeal I would have while staring at a lethal injection. I felt them stay on me, examining my every movement as my own eyes traveled randomly across the table. Taking a sip from my glass of water, I sent my father another silent warning and hoped he would keep silent throughout the entire meal.

But I knew him better than that.

I bit my lip…

And waited…

Waited for the _worst_ moment to come.

The maladroit comments would begin _any_ moment now.

"You look…very familiar…_too_ familiar actually. What team did you say you were from again?" my dad asked before gulping down another mouthful of the horrendous curry.

'_And then it __**starts**__.' _

Lee raised his view towards the man sitting in front of him, faces intently staring at each other in puzzlement through the steam of the food.

"Pardon sir?" he asked uneasily as he picked at his victuals. "I never informed you of such a thing."

"Wasn't your teacher in the same team as the Uchiha's when he was a genin?" my mother's voice perked up to further aggravate Lee.

I could tell he did _not_ like where this conversation was headed.

"No, he was the one who was always picking a fight with that Kakashi kid." My dad snapped his fingers continuously as he searched his mind for Gai's former comrades.

I could only _pray_ they never uncovered his identity.

"Namikaze's student?" my mother tried to jog his memory as she sipped her tea.

"Yeah, Obito? No…hm…_MAITO_!" my father finally exploded with surprise as though he had won the grand prize of a game. "You're that Maito brat's student right? _Right_!?" he asked impatiently.

I fought the urge to bang my head against the table as my parents continued to torture the poor boy.

"Y-yes…Gai is my instructor." Lee finally gave in and admitted, eyes returning momentarily to his food.

"_Really_? My, even though you've let your hair grow a bit you're the _spitting_ image of him I swear!" My father continued to study Lee like I studied specimen under a microscope at work.

At this Lee could say nothing in return. He bit the edge of his lip and kept silent, shoving the food around in his plate with great interest. My mother cleared her throat and mumbled something about me not eating enough protein. Even the humming of my refrigerator could be heard over our tacit discomfort. I stared at my own meal and wondered if it was even _edible_. My hand automatically grabbed a spoon and lifted a diminutive amount of curry to my lips. The mere scent of the piquant food forced me to pull it away from me lest I gagged. A condescending glance from my mother warned me not to comment any more on the meal and eat it. I stared askance at my plate and wondered if the food was _carbonated_ since it seemed to bubble so much.

'_How bad can it be? Certainly better than my __**mother's**__ cooking.'_ I inveigled myself into gathering my courage and lifted a spoonful to my mouth again.

I refused to be made a mockery by my parents and Lee (who seemed to be taking their side when it came to my nutrition.) Garnering what nerve I still had left, I closed my eyes and devoured the vivid curry. My tongue swirled around it, my taste buds trying to find the flavor in it in vain as my parents' interested eyes looked at me. I waited a few moments to see if there was anything wrong with it, then tastelessly gulped down a second generous amount of curry. There was no heat in it; it was surprisingly _mild_ to the senses as it slid down my throat and into my esophagus. I shrugged and scooped a third spoonful.

That's when it hit me.

I opened my mouth, but no words would come out save for a pathetic wheezing sound. My eyes slowly began to water, my lips grew arid and chapped, and I felt my throat snap shut. A few quivering rasping gasps were the only sound I could emit, one sounding shorter than the last. My dropped spoon clanked against my half empty dish before I began to cough violently as the full blown blast of heat from the curry smashed into my senses and scathed my tongue.

My father laughed at my reaction.

My mother gave an astounded "Oh!" while covering her mouth.

And Lee calmly served me another glass of water.

I desperately accepted it and tried to gulp it down without accidentally swallowing the whole glass cup. My nose stung as the spices seemed to explode in my sinuses, I rubbed my eyes and cursed myself when I remember my bare hands had traces of the searing curry on them. I felt as though my throat was trying to throw up the foul substance as I shoved it back down with fervent guzzles of water. There was no way in hell I would start to vomit in here.

Not with that damn Lee patting my back as though I were a helpless child.

"Anyway," my father began a conversation with Lee as though I weren't hacking up my own _stomach_ with the fiery food, "I'm glad they eventually gave Maito some students of his own to teach. Is this…Naruto boy on your team as well?"

"Honey, shh, don't ask him about it." My mother tried to change the subject as she stared at my gagging in interest and nibbled on her food.

She was never this courteous around guests, if anything, the mention of the ninetailed fox's vessel was enough to get her alarmed.

"And why not? It's not like it's _taboo_ or anything like that-"

"It IS!" my mother hissed.

"So anyway," my father began, finally realizing he was trying my mother's patience, "isn't that surviving Uchiha kid in your team then?" he continued to inquire the boy next to me with no trace of tact.

"No, he's in _mine_ too dad, -you can never remember _anything_!" I exclaimed angrily before having another coughing fit. There was not much else I _could_ say since the horrid food had incapacitated my speech. I could only glare at my dad in fury while I took swigs of the relieving water. My red glassy eyes could barely open as I tried to wipe away the profuse tears that fell. Lee smiled and handed me a much needed napkin to dry them.

"You should not have eaten that much of it, now your face looks like a cherry." He teased once I finally regained my composure.

"Lee…shut up." I wheezed, not caring what my appearance was.

"Hatake is also on their team honey." My mother pointed out, hoping to redirect my father's attention somewhere else.

"What? As a teammate?"

"He is their _teacher_ sir." Lee corrected while raising a confused eyebrow.

My father nearly choked on his food as he said this.

"_Seriously_? I thought he died or something."

"No…still alive and kicking." I mumbled, pleased that I could finally breathe and form comprehensible words.

"Well, anyway," he placed my comments aside and directed his attention back at Lee. "If I didn't know Gai's age I'd say you two were father and son. How's he doing?"

My father's shin was probably bruised to a bloody pulp by now with all the times I kept kicking it with what I _thought_ was the utmost secrecy. He only shot me a confused look and innocently turned back to Lee who appeared to be greatly disturbed.

"He is fine thank you." He answered quietly and returned to his seat.

"Well that is good to know."

"Honestly, you are so nosy." My mother berated him. "It's a wonder why they don't make you an interrogation specialist." She joked.

"Nah, Ibiki said even _he_ couldn't handle my talking, said it was worse than _torture_!" he slapped his hand on top of the table repeatedly and cackled at his own joke, waiting for us to join him as he laughed.

If I tried to crack a smile I swore my face would break.

My mother's lips twitched.

And Lee weakly chuckled.

"So how was your mission dad?" I asked, rebuffing the plate in front of me and getting up for something that wouldn't violently close my esophagus.

"Same as how it always is: annoying, exciting, and tedious." He blatantly answered.

I rolled my eyes and ripped open the lid from a ramen cup. It had been _months_ since I had laid eyes on my father and he never seemed to change. He was the same lax, absentminded, lazy, and haphazard man no matter how much time went by. I had often found myself wondering how a scatterbrain like my mother and such an inattentive person like him remembered they were even _married_. I often wondered if _I_ would be like that when I grew older and got married. _Would_ I be like that? Would I forget my own child's face and work frenziedly on missions? Would I rarely see my husband? Would I even _get_ married? Would I…would Lee be…?

I shook my head, trying not to think that far ahead in my future.

There was no point.

"-and then we escaped the falling building just in time for me to memorize twenty scrolls worth of secret information…hmp, sure showed that Inoichi idiot who was boss though." My father seemed to finish the retelling of his adventures once reality clutched me back.

He was a bit neglectful, but I suppose that was only because he spent more time honing his skills.

"Oh dear, won't you ever _drop_ it?" my mother sighed in exasperation as she set her eating utensil down.

"No, in fact I make it a priority to rub it in his face each time I see him."

"Honey…if anything I think he is more than happy with his wife. Their daughter is so nice too, she's always helping her mother out at that flower shop."

"That didn't stop him from hitting on you when we were younger. Anyway, Yano? Yeeno? What did they call that girl?" my father scratched his shaven chin as he tried to recall the pig's name. "She's in the same team as the Nara's kid right? Sakura, isn't she your friend?"

I grumbled a random reply.

"Yes, in fact, they've been best friends since-!"

"No, she's not." I corrected my mother irately. "_Tenten_ is."

"Tenten? Now _that's_ a name I've never heard."

"She is from my team sir." Lee quietly pointed out as he dutifully ate his food.

"So _THAT'S_ how you two know each other! I thought you just kind of stalked Sakura until-"

I nearly crushed the ramen cup in half as my self-respect gave out.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The living room was warm and inviting as we lolled in random positions on our couches and rug after dinner. Growling in annoyance from his sprawled pose on the couch, my father sporadically changed the channel as he tried to watch something on television that didn't bore him. Cheesy soap operas, the Icha Icha Violence movie, and trivial news were the only things any of us occasionally glanced at. My mother giggled and continued to run her fingers through his hair as his head rested on her lap. I sighed and stretched lazily from my place in the rug, looking at Lee as he sat erect on a chair with his hands in his lap. Thankfully, both my parents had bought the lousy excuse I had given them about the broken couch (although I knew I would never hear the end of it from Lee once we were alone.) Only a couple of scatterbrains would believe it broke by _itself_.

I heard my father clear his throat several times.

"So…Lee."

I inwardly growled at his inquisitive disposition. I knew what this would bring.

"Yes sir?"

"Besides through Tenten…how exactly did you two meet?" he asked, bringing up the subject again while fully knowing what his questions were doing to my dignity.

"During the Chunin exam a few years ago…

"Lee saved my life from three sound ninja!" I interrupted all while glorifying him. "Naruto and Sasuke were down for the count and he risked his life for me."

My father's eyes lit up in surprise from his comfortable position on the now fixed couch. I could already sense what his feelings were on the matter; he might have been fond of me as a daughter, but he _hardly_ stood for protection based on something as old fashioned as gender when it came to fighting. He seemed to idly stare at Lee as if his doing so would bring about the answer to this self contradicting act. "Ah…and why _did_ you save her Lee? You weren't in her team." He asked, stopping to glance warningly at me. "Ninja do not stop to help their enemies during battle."

I instinctively flinched at this factual remark. Lee had been my enemy, even if we _were_ from the same village there was no reason he could give for risking my his life while keeping his feelings covert.

Lee stared at him momentarily before reverting his gaze back to the television.

"I just desperately wanted her to love me." His answer was as simple as commenting on how _cloudy_ it was.

The awkward and thick silence that followed could have been hacked to pieces. My father dropped the remote control in surprise as he tried to process the unexpected information.

My mother's squeals were the first thing we heard.

"That is so sweet Lee! Honey isn't that sweet? Aw Sakura, don't you think that's sweet?"

"Yeah, sure." I grumbled, wondering how long it would take me to dig a hole to bury myself in it.

"So you two are dating I presume?" my father cut off my mother's over sentimental rambling.

Lee almost frowned as he replied. "No, this happened quite some time ago, it never progressed to anything deeper than simple friendship."

My father poked his head over the console of my mother's lap to give him an odd look.

"Did I hear a trace of lament in that voice of yours Lee?" he asked curiously.

Lee returned an innocent gaze. "Did I hear a trace of interest in _yours_? Would you _like_ for me to date your daughter sir?"

"Are you _asking_ me or _mocking_ me?" he warned while he frowned back.

"I am _asking_ you sir. May I please…may I please date your daughter?"

'_Oh in all that is sweet and holy…why me?' _

I didn't know which was worse: my mother's sappy remarks or my father's roaring laughter.

"Well, you certainly are a _rare_ one indeed!" he exclaimed as he continued to chuckle. "You're a good boy Lee!"

"May I then?" he repeated with a stolid expression.

"I think you are asking the wrong person Lee." He answered as he motioned towards me. "_I'm_ not the one who's going to date you." He laughed again at his own joke before he slipped his head back to my mother's pampering.

It was beyond me how all three of them could sound so unperturbed over this.

I was no longer listening, I was currently plotting ways in which to silently _kill_ myself and somehow take Lee with me as his eyes met my own.

"Sakura?"

"Why are you asking me this _here_?" I begged for some privacy and decency as I desperately played with some string coming off the couch pillow.

It was impossible to escape my parent's interested eyes as they stared at the scene in front of them unfold like a suspenseful soap opera. My tongue went arid and my right eye twitched from the unspoken wrath.

"Why? Are you still upset about the shirt-"

"Lee shut up!" I hissed, burying my febrile face on the pillow, "I'm not going to answer you _here_!"

"And why not? We have known each other for an adequate amount of time, I have properly been introduced to your parents, your father and mother do not seem to mind, and I have been wanting to ask you this since I do not know how long." Each reason he listed seemed to make me want to cringe from its validity.

"_Shut_…_**up**_." I ordered through clenched teeth.

"You know Sakura, if anything you should be more grateful to have someone like Lee…most boys his age don't even have the decency to say what he did just now." My father pointed out before he changed the channel to the weather forecast. "Oh look, there's rain tomorrow."

My mother shot me a furtive look and resumed petting my dad like a dog. "Oh, before I forget Sakura…that Sasuke boy stopped by earlier…he was with a blond haired boy as well."

I made a mental note to worship my mother for such an opportune distraction.

"And that's not all, someone from the Hyuga household asked me about you as I waited for your father outside the briefing room." My mother's curious eyes narrowed in my direction while she told me this. "What have you been up to Sakura?"

"Sasuke and Naruto are my _teammates_," I assured her for what seemed the seventh time that evening, "they probably just came over to pick me up for training and-"

"Well…they looked like they had just gotten OUT of practice…they looked pretty beat up." she remarked as she contemplated the boys' appearance.

"Then the idiots came over for me to heal them." I explained, knowing well my house was closer than the hospital. (The idiots were probably not too keen on facing Tsunade after all the times she's had to heal them as well.) If even Master Jiraiya and Orochimaru were frightened of her strength; their students were wise to do the same.

I snickered at the thought of me stirring those same emotions of unmitigated terror in them eventually if I didn't already.

"Thank you very much for inviting me for dinner and allowing me to talk with you."

Lee's polite voice stopped my wicked mental plotting as I saw him give both my parents a short gracious bow.

"Oh, you are welcome anytime Lee, isn't he darling?" my mother practically adored him.

My father could only nod as he changed the channel back to the pervy sage's movie. "Uh…yeah sure. Man I love this film."

Lee smiled and glanced at me. "Sir…may I…may I please speak with Sakura for a few moments outside?" he asked, waiting for my father's approval.

Momentarily tearing his eyes of the screen, he burst into another fit of laughter as he looked at Lee. "You're _just_ like Maito when he was younger, I swear you're his son!"

Taking his tactless jokes as consent, I scrambled to get up from the rug and shoved Lee out of the house. I slammed the door behind us and finally took a sigh of relief from my ended torment. Lee raised an eyebrow at me as he hid his hands behind his back, looking endearingly confused from my frenzied actions. He opened his mouth to say something, but opted to smile instead.

"I'm sorry you had to see that." I mumbled.

"I enjoyed it. Your parents are very…lively." He responded as his smile disappeared. "I was, however, rather offended when you did not introduce me as your boyfriend…I assumed that they had already known."

"Well, you've never _asked_ me that before, so how I was supposed to know Lee?"

"Ah, well that is true."

"I don't know why you asked me that in FRONT of them though." I pointed out again as I covered my forehead with my hand. "You have _no_ idea how embarrassed I was."

"_Embarrassed_? Is it not the proper way to ask a girl's parents before asking _her_ out?" he asked, his bottom lip protruding adorably in puzzlement.

"You're way too proper for your own good. You just don't understand how it is around parents."

At this, Lee's expression quickly changed to that of a disconcerted individual.

"Forgive me for not understanding then, I do not know what is suitable and what is not around 'parents'." He said with a shrug.

A jolt of realization made me want to swallow my words when I realized I was being oblivious to his own past circumstances.

"No-no! I'm sorry Lee, I didn't mean it like that!" I exclaimed as I took his hands in my own.

Lee chuckled and playfully squeezed them. "It is quite all right, it is true. After all, I never really had them."

The memory of a defeated Gai drowning himself in sorrow and bottles ran through my mind when he claimed his parentless childhood. Had his student completely forgotten about his teacher and shoved him into the abyss of his consciousness? It had been several months and I had yet to convince Lee to see him. He had made amazing progress courtesy of the therapy sessions, but I had to see if he was willing to take it another step further.

"Well…you have Gai Sensei." I remarked awkwardly.

"Do not start."

"Lee…I've been meaning to ask you…"

"What is it?"

"I…I..I.." I gulped down my fear, knowing what I said next would most likely result in a verbal heated argument that would end with one of us crying (namely me.) But I also knew that I could no longer amble past the subject and never bring it up; procrastination was a luxury I no longer had at my disposal.

Shaking, but confident about my choice, I took a breath and decided to rid myself of precaution, "I want you to see…Gai Sensei."

If my words had stirred anything within Lee, sheer displeasure was the first emotion expressed. "We have been through this Sakura…I will do no such thing."

"Did all that time with him mean nothing then?!" I demanded justification for why he would so coldly ostracize his teacher.

"I do not know...perhaps I was just an adulating fool back then. Gai seemed like everything I wanted to strive to be." He admitted as he stared listlessly at our entwined hands.

"Well...he was the one who believed in you when no one else did. Don't you remember?" I urged him to resurface his moribund feelings for his team.

His scoff, however, filled me with a rushing choler that nearly made me want to punch him.

"Does it honestly bother you _that_ much?" he asked sullenly, a bit peeved from my surly mood.

"Yes it _does_! Gai Sensei was like a _father_ to you!…I don't believe that anyone who cared for him as much as you did can be so apathetic towards him now!" I retorted.

Lee scoffed again and turned his face away from me, apparently not ready to give way to reasoning.

"Sakura, _what_ can I say to the man who fought my own battle? _What_ can I say to someone I so fervently despise?"

"You can tell him you're sorry." I pointed out rather brusquely.

"Sorry? Sorry for _what_?" he seethed.

"For being such an inconsiderate, selfish, ungrateful, and HORRIBLE person!"

"What are you talking about?"

"From what I hear, it was Gai who saved your lives on your mission Lee. All the thanks he ever got from you was hatred."

"He should have known better than to-"

"Lee SHUT UP! He fought for you because he _cares_ for you! I don't know all the details of what happened, but it wasn't some stupid training exercise-you could've been _KILLED_ if Gai Sensei hadn't intervened!"

Lee's hold on me tightened as my words sunk into whatever reason he had. He took a swig of air and pulled me towards him. It seemed rare he had yet to come up with a witty response, some stinging remark to counter my supplications. There was none he could give I suppose. Lee merely presented me with pure contemplative silence before slowly opening his mouth.

"Sakura…I hate everyone right now…I hate most of my comrades, my instructor, my father, _myself_. But…out of all these people…_you_ are the one that I wish to be with at the moment…can you accept that answer?" he asked earnestly.

I shook my head slowly, absorbing his brash statement about his friends. There was no way to comment on his odium toward his once assumed "precious" people without rousing his anger. It was better to deal with it when _he_ felt ready rather than force him to talk about it.

There was just no point.

"I-I understand." I whispered. "Though it does not mean that I _accept_ it."

"But…you are…right I suppose." He confessed bitterly.

My eyes and face perked up with hope.

"L-Lee…please? _Please_ go with me? Tenten tells me he barely sleeps..that he…that he spends all of his time drinking…you have to do _something_ Lee!…please go? For me?" I beseeched him as I turned to face him rested my hand against his cheek.

He sighed and kissed my forehead, making sure to teasingly bump his nose against mine before he looked at me.

"All right…all…right, fine…take me to him. I know you will not drop the subject at any rate."

I grinned and quickly reopened my house's door.

"MOM, DAD! I'M GOING OUT FOR A WHILE!" I bellowed as I stuck my head inside the house.

"All right sweetie, take care!"

"When did _you_ get here Sakura?"

I rolled my eyes, not wishing to know whether my father truly had the memory span of a fish.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The familiar mixture of merriment, forgotten shames, and alcohol hung heavy in the air as I practically continued to drag Lee across the scattered streets. I heard his muttered whines and complaints about the horrid place but I paid him no mind as I feverishly searched for his teacher. It had been many months, but Kakashi Sensei had told me of a new bar he and Gai had taken a liking to. (How he could simply _allow_ his friend to wallow in sake was beyond me.) I supposed Gai was not the type to listen to reason anymore than Lee was.

"Agh, we can't find him!" I exclaimed, getting worn out from my frantic search. "There's got to be a ton of bars in this district _alone_!"

"What makes you think you will find him here after all this time?" Lee asked, taking an uninterested look around before resting his gaze on me.

"Because this is where he _SPENDS_ most of his time now because of _you_!" I snapped.

He shrugged, appearing completely indifferent over the matter, and pulled me into the opposite direction from the myriad of bars.

"Lee-let go of me, where are you-!"

"I know the fool better than you do…I…I know where he could be." He muttered.

"The _fool_!? _YOU'RE_ the fool if you think you can call your own sensei that and-!"

"Sakura, did the old man say anything to you?" he asked, implicating a new topic concerning the psychiatrist. I could tell he wanted block out my blustering as he continued to pull me.

I eventually gave in to his tugging and allowed my languid body to follow him until we reached a familiar looking street. The yellow lanterns that often illuminated the paths of our village were already extinguished and the neatly aligned houses seemed deserted from their bleak appearances. Lee's hand on my own heated my face as I battled with my lungs to find breath to speak. My eyes blinked in confusion when I realized I had known this street. Through our poorly lit course I could still see blossoms embellishing the trees like descending snow…blossoms someone had once placed in my hair to humor me and make me laugh, blossoms someone had once compared me to. I shivered. The night was warm and inviting with the nonage of the season, yet…I felt my eyes had shifted downward.

The street was one I had often walked with Ino to the academy when I was younger.

"Has he said anything about _what_?" I huffed, trying my best to block out the wistful memories.

"About anything."

I quickened my pace as I tried to conceal the elderly man's warning.

'_Would you really kill yourself Lee? Even now?" _

"Only that I should take care of you." I quickly answered.

Lee sighed and muttered a curse. "I already have an incessantly scolding mother named _Neji_ who does that."

As we walked toward the foundation of our young studies I tried not to laugh.

"So…what makes you think we'll find Gai Sensei here?"

"The academy's roof was our team's first meeting place…and I would often come there just to think." He replied dully.

"Did you ever go there to think about _me_?" I joked, clearly not expecting an answer.

He shrugged and tightened his hold on my hand. "I do not need a place for that."

Before long, we both stood staring at a recognizable academy with the lone swing vacillating with the gentle breeze. No lights were on, adding to the school's eerie invitation for us.

"It is hard to believe we used to come here." Lee mumbled, apparently trying to find an excuse for his hesitancy to enter.

"It looks really creepy at night though."

"Are you _scared_?" he jeered with a smirk that reminded me of an immature student daring his classmates to enter a cave.

"N-no." I uttered and tried to hide my sudden moment of vulnerability.

'_Idiot.' _

"Well?"

"Well what?"

"Are you not going to come with me?"

"Why should I? Isn't this some manly man talk that no one can interrupt?" I rubbed the back of my head in puzzlement. "Besides…it's none of my business to be there."

"Oh, so it is only your business when it is _convenient_?"

"Shut it Lee, I'm in no mood…and anyway how are we going to get in? The doors are _locked_." I asked, but felt a tad bit foolish as I watched Lee use his chakra to walk up the wall with ease.

I silently followed and kept my mouth shut. My hair gave way to gravity and momentum as I pushed it to the back of my head and wondered how Lee had agreed so quickly to see his sensei. It almost seemed like something was out of place. Perhaps the event had been far too convenient or rapid. Lee _rarely_ complied with anything I suggested and this was no exception. Pushing the sense of dread to the back of my mind, I pulled myself up from the wall to the roof…

And nearly gasped at what I found.

Through the bleakness of the top floor, I could barely see the slouching figure of a man reclining on red seats. The jonin's head hung low as his hands cupped the back of his neck, making him appear forlorn and defeated. An animalistic urge nearly made me want to smack Lee across the face from what he had caused. Gai had done nothing wrong, yet he was the one who was suffering the most from Lee's drastic change. Tenten had eventually forgiven her teammate and Neji had _somewhat_ habituated to his hostile moods, but the team's teacher was _far_ from rebuilding his own relationship between his once precious student. I held my hand back despite Gai's piteous position.

It would have been imprudent to say Gai Sensei had not sensed our presence from far away, yet his head did not rise to greet us. I thought he had fallen asleep judging from his slowly ascending shoulders.

"You've gotten a bit taller Lee, how long has it been?"

I held my breath as the man spoke without moving.

"Not long enough." Lee all but spat.

"I see living with Neji has caused you to take after him." He remarked with a wry and parched voice.

"Do _not_ compare me to that idiot." Lee warned as he took a seat next to his Sensei.

The older man slowly raised his head, his hands gently resting on his knees. Both ninja presently faced each other, choosing _now_ of all times to not speak a single word lest they attacked one another. Lee shifted uncomfortably, looking irately at his teacher, and was the first to take his eyes away once he realized Gai was staring at him with the same expression in his eyes. His sleepless eyes held no sympathy towards his student, merely a reflection of Lee's detestation. Lee sighed, shook his head, and rose from the seat.

"This was a waste of time Sakura." He muttered with a dry laugh as he began to retreat.

Gai Sensei callously grabbed Lee's arm before he had even taken his first step and flung him back on the seat like a rag doll.

"I needed to keep the team _safe_ Lee!" Gai was the first to bring up the horrid topic that had been all but hidden for months.

Lee's initial shock from the harsh impact of the cushion against his back wore off as he glowered at his sensei.

"You are _no_ family to me to risk your life like that! You are NOT my damn _FATHER_!" he screamed back.

"And you are _not_ my son." Gai replied with just as much silent fury as Lee. His voice was calm and morose, but ready to lash out at his own student whom I had sworn he had thought as his own blood.

Lee turned his head away, a tinge of shame imminent in his dark unmoving eyes. He had been somewhat shocked from hearing Gai's retort, but bit his lip in spite.

"We are nothing then." He finished, somewhat satisfied with the grim comprehension.

'_Nothing?' _

The sick realization sunk into the bottom of my stomach and slammed itself into the depths of my consciousness like a brick. My legs grew feeble and I found myself trying to support myself against the nearby balcony. I gasped when my hand accidentally flung through air as my body leaned back. Curious passerbys taking a walk looked upwards at the scene, some shaking their heads while others blatantly staring in disbelief at the fight coming undone before them as master and pupil broke their bonds and thrashed them through scathing words. I could tolerate no more as I sank to the concrete floor, utterly helpless as any of those people to attempt to do anything about the matter. My cheeks and ears burned as I tried to shut out the horrible issue that had been strewn by my feet, waiting for me to crack and give up whatever sediments of sanity I had left. Covering my eyes and cheeks from the atrocious act, I huddled over in a ball of lament and self cursing for ever forcing Lee to face Gai when he did not wish it.

I hated myself.

"Lee, I only did what I thought was best for you-" Gai's explanation was interrupted by his livid student.

"And you tore my DIGNITY and HONOR _away_ from me the moment you did!" he yelled back with repressed scorn.

"I did what I had to do to get us out alive and-"

"Do you have any idea-_ANY_ idea!...of what you have DONE to me?!" Lee raged, his knuckles clenched so tightly I swore they were numb with pain.

"I have saved the life of people who were precious to me Lee! I hid you and fought your father because I knew he would _KILL_ you if he had the chance!" his teacher practically supplicated him to listen to reason.

Lee was not about to budge.

"IT IS FAR BETTER TO DIE WITH _HONOR_ THAN TO LIVE IN DISGRACE LIKE I AM!" he shouted.

I swore his voice would be hoarse by the time this was finished.

"Disgrace?" Gai asked with a dry chuckle, "Disgrace?...You do not know the _meaning_ of it, you have no right…NO RIGHT!..." his normal voice, which was thunderous enough in its daily usage, was now even more monstrous as his fury reach its hilt. Lee rose from the seat and took a small step back, somehow sensing the desperation of Gai's nearly raw voice as he yelled at him and challenged him. I looked up in time to see Lee's eyes quickly regain that same listless and apathetic demeanor that rivaled Sai's as he adapted himself to his teacher's voice. I began to choke on my own breath as I felt their voices give way to spiteful glares that wished to kill. Gai Sensei held no more sympathy for his student, I could sense it, now he just wanted to beat sense into him.

The gauntlet had been thrown.

"I _hate_ you…no-_HATE_ is too weak a word to describe how I feel for you…" Lee retorted, "I…utterly _despise_ you! I am _abhorred_ by the mere thought of you, I curse you! I wish you would have died on that horrid mission just so I could have spat on your gra-"

A sickening crunching sound made me hug my knees even tighter to my chest as I lay huddled.

No more.

I could take no more.

I shakily forced my body to emerge from the floor to witness the sight before me.

Lee clung to the edge of the seats that had apparently been broken in half, one hand wiping his lips as he tried to stand up. Gai stood before him, one hand still outstretched in front of him in a tight bloodied fist.

A sliver of exposed red flesh was ripped apart as Lee realized where the searing pain was coming from.

"DON'T!" I screamed and shielded the wounded boy behind me. "Please don't fight! I didn't bring you guys together so you could-!"

"Sakura! Get OUT of the way!" Lee screamed with a voice that stopped the flow of blood within my system.

Gai paid me no mind as he kindly but sternly pushed me aside with a single arm, never allowing his eyesight to escape that of Lee's.

I closed my eyes and covered my ears, wanting desperately to end this fight. It had been the same now as it was back then. I could not stop Naruto and Sasuke from battling each other for honor and pride. I could not stop Sasuke from leaving me and I could not stop him from hurting his best friend. It would be no different between these two men. Nothing had changed, even I, with all my training and learning, stood powerless as Gai walked towards his pupil with an impending sense of dread. He stopped to face him merely inches away from one another. Sharp unnerving eyes met for the briefest of seconds before the older man raised his arm to strike once again…

…and enveloped his student.

"Lee…why don't you understand? They had taken Tenten and Neji away…you were unconscious from foolishly charging at your own father without knowing the full extent of his powers…tell me…what was I to do?" his voice cracked with grief as he asked the desperate question. "What was I…to _do_?"

"Gai Sensei…I…" insight had struck something within Lee as I noticed his downcast eyes fluctuate between misunderstanding and repentance. He had finally looked at Gai not with malice or ill will, but with a sense of regret.

Lee slowly slipped away from his one arm embrace and stared at his instructor, looking aghast at what had gotten out of his mouth.

"I…I am…sorry…" he stared at Gai and sighed. "I am…no longer the student you want me to be." He whispered, knuckles finally unwinding from their stressful positions to reveal red crescent moons from his digging nails. "I can never be what anybody wants me to-"

"You still are my student Lee…no matter how much changes, _that_ at least, will never change." Gai pointed out with what I thoughts was a faint smile.

Lee shifted his eyes over to the floor and gazed at the mess they had created. He bit his lower lip and took a shaking breath that failed to calm him. "The things I have said…I…I did not mean them Sensei, I-"

"It's all right…we've both had things we needed to get off our chests." Gai accepted the apology before it had even left Lee's lips.

The older man helped his student step out of the turmoil of broken wood and cushion and stopped to look at me. Gai's expression was that of a man who had finally been relieved of some burden, a man who had rectified his regrets, but more than anything it reminded me of the face of a father who had his child returned to him. I gave him a warm smile and weakly lifted my right thumb in his direction, reminiscing on the promise I had made to him. A new goal was needed now that Lee had finally faced him. I needed to assure his teammates, his teacher, and friends that I would bring back Lee the way he used to be. His recovery would never fully be consummate, I was no fool, but I at least had to try.

I wouldn't be able to forgive myself if I didn't.

After escaping the engrossed gazes of people while exiting the vile place, I was grateful when we finally reached the deserted street once more. Lee seemed to be mortified from the entire incident and kept facing downward as we walked with the leaf jounin.

"Gai Sensei?" the words seemed alien on his tongue after so many months of not speaking of him. "I promise I will get better…for my teammates and you."

"Don't promise us anything Lee…do it for _yourself_ or don't do it at all." He answered calmly once we were numerous blocks away from the lonely district.

"For…_myself_ then?" Lee answered slowly, as if barely realizing he could think for himself.

He placed his hand on top of Lee's head and gave him a frail smile, looking somewhat recovered and cheerful already. "We need to have a squad meeting…to get some things straightened out."

"Yes sir."

"In the mean time…I want you to take Sakura home, sleep, and meet me at our usual training spot in the morning. Understood?"

"Yes sir."

"Okay then, I'm off."

"W-wait….Gai Sensei." Lee muttered pleadingly.

"What is it?"

"Do you…_hate_ me as well?" his rejected and aggrieved face looked upwards to face Gai and expected his greatest fears to be confirmed.

At this his teacher could only smile as he raised his hand upwards to his face. I had to flinch when I thought he was going to macerate him against a building.

"Neji and I haven't…really been fair with you, have we Lee? I should have known this would happen eventually no matter how many talks I had with you. I guess I just wanted to pretend this whole incident with your father had never happened…I wanted to erase it from your mind or at least suppress it so you wouldn't have to suffer. I wanted…a lot of impossible things from you." He sighed and with his index finger gave a gentle poke to his student's forehead.

Lee stepped back from the light impact and touched the maltreated darkened spot.

"I have gotten help…I still do not fully _understand_ the point of it but I…I will continue attending my therapy."

"See that you do…now I have to go. I have to take care of something."

A few agile hand signs were made and the jounin disappeared within a thick puff of smoke, leaving me to finally breathe a sigh of relief. After the comfort of a few moments, Lee grabbed my hand and obediently began pulling me in the direction of my house.

"That was odd." I mumbled offhandedly once we had been walking for some distance.

"I suppose so."

"Does it hurt?" I asked, motioning to his battered lip.

"A bit…I deserved it but…he was still holding back."

"Well of COURSE he would hold back you idiot! He would never _honestly_ hurt you!" I exclaimed as I touched the dry blood that had once exuded from the cut.

"Sakura…you are…so intrusive." He said with a smile.

"But you still care about me right?"

He cleared his throat in response, causing me to become overwhelmed with chagrin.

"By the way…you never answered my question Sakura."

"What was it?" I asked impatiently, a bit disappointed from his change of conversation.

Lee bit his lip and glanced at me, looking somewhat afflicted from my lack of comprehension.

"Will you still be my girlfriend?" his eyes made contact with the floor for a mere second before a tinge of red smeared his features.

"I don't know." I replied honestly.

"You are so horrible." His voice seemed tense.

The blush was obliterated, the affection was gone, and I wish I could have just said yes.

"_I'm_ horrible? You just told your father figure you wished him dead and _I'm_ horrible?" I teased.

"Sakura…" his face was now staring at me intently, looking as though he would lash out at me any moment. I entwined my fingers and placed my arms behind my back in mere innocence, hoping against fate that perhaps Lee would be a bit lenient on me. An odd smile suddenly reached the tips of his lips as he pressed himself close against me.

"Sakura…may I please kiss you?"

His jarring question made my blood rush as I stammered for an answer.

"_What_? NO! Stop changing the subject!" I all but yelled from his impulsive behavior.

"So you do not want me to kiss you _ever_?" he teased with a mock remorseful expression.

I had to rub my forehead several times to pacify myself lest I decided to slap Lee. He continued to smirk and brought his body closer to mine, aggravating my mood.

"Lee, this is _no_ time to do this straight after making amends with your tea-"

I would have bitten off and swallowed my own tongue had Lee not halted my protests by jamming my hand up his shirt.

"Lee! This isn't even _proper_ to do in the middle of-"

"I do not care." He tersely interrupted. "After all this time…not _once_ have I given you an inkling of affection, not _once_ have I held you in my arms with a sense of assurance for our feelings, not _once_. Yet you have stayed with me patiently, never asking for anything in return for your help."

"That's because I'm not _expecting_ anything in return Lee!" I exclaimed in worry. "I'm doing this because I _care_ about you! There's no need for you to feel like you owe me or anything! I-"

"May I please kiss you?"

Any further protesting had left my mouth as I pondered a reply for his odd interrupting question. His warm stomach moved underneath my fingertips, tempting me and making rational thought nearly impossible. I didn't know whether my mouth had gone dry or started drooling.

"Why did you ask me that?" I uttered, trying my best to ignore the obvious physical contact.

"I would not think it wise to kiss you off guard….I do not want to get slapped again." He joked, making me remember the first time I had beaten his face raw in my room.

I shifted uneasily at the memory.

"Agh Lee! But that's just _it_! You don't need to _ASK_ me! That ruins the whole concept of even _KISSING_ someone!" I scolded.

"Then will you please kiss _me_?"

"_What_? What's wrong with you!?" I blurted out in surprise. "What the hell has _gotten_ into you?!"

"Will you? I-I…I mean…I am afraid that I will not do it very well." My brows creased when I saw his bottom lip protruding in an adorable way that resembled a pout as he confessed his fear like a child.

"It's…it's _kissing_ Lee, how hard can it be?" I finally gave in to the subject.

"_Very_! I wish for it to be pleasant for you."

I blinked several times when I realized he was not joking about his request. His lips partly opened as he urged me on to kiss him. He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against my own, luring me further into him.

I gulped.

"All you need is to lean a bit more." He whispered huskily.

"…But…ah…" I mumbled, clearly oblivious on how to handle the situation.

This had been bizarre and much too sudden…but I was not one to complain as I felt Lee's lips inch closer to my own, encouraging me and teasing me.

Being careful not to practically give him a bloody lip with my sudden force, I attempted to inch closer to him as well. It turned out to be a failure. We laughed when our noses bumped against one another, we laughed when I was barely able reach his chin as I rose to the tips of my feet, and we laughed when all I could manage to kiss was his lower lip because of my stature. He lowered his head to solve my predicament, but I was _still_ battling with myself over the concept of _kissing_ him. I was riveted by the fact that I would finally be able to do such a thing with him, yet I feared what the consequences would be. He had never offered himself this freely before…it forced me to think something was off.

He allowed me no more time to think as he tantalized me by shoving my hand further up his shirt.

I gasped from his unexpected effrontery but found I could do nothing about it.

There was no time to think.

I decided to simply tilt my head and completely reach his neglected lips.

His mouth curved into a smile as it made slight contact with my own. Without being aware of it, I found my hand had instinctively pulled at the back of his neck and forced him further down to my level. My other hand escaped his shirt and seemed engrossed in tugging at his hair with more strength than it intended to use. A muffled and pained chuckle was lost from Lee as he realized I was being rough with him. He complied with my implicit needs as he encircled one arm around my back and shoved our bodies closer together. The sheer proximity between his rising chest and my own was enough to accelerate my heart and shock my senses. His lips were the same as they had been all those months ago on a pouring night inside his bathroom. I nearly shuddered from this unexpected and immense contact as I continued to taste his naturally sweet lips. As much as I wanted to though, they would not open completely for me. This almost caused my mind to drive to the brink of madness.

It was only through Lee as he gently pulled himself away that I was able to compose myself once more.

"You are so rough Sakura." He scolded with a grin while gasping for air and rubbing his probably aching scalp.

"Only because I know you can handle it." I replied as I tried to straighten out my ruffled clothes from our actions. My lungs were currently ravaging what diminutive air I gave them.

I grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and lightly kissed him again; making him groan in response once he was mere inches away from me. He touched his lips with his fingertips and continued to shyly glance at me as we began to walk again. The act had been done and finished, never to be resurfaced again unless we accustomed ourselves to it. I occasionally looked back at him, only to find him staring at the ground.

"Why…why did you do that Lee?" I asked, noticing he had continuously touched his lips where my own had been.

"Why can I _not_? Can a man not kiss the one he cares for?" he inquired back softly.

"Yeah but…are you sure this is..okay?"

"Why should it NOT be?" his defenses rose.

"You're not even done with your therapy." I pointed out.

A sense of culpability flooded my consciousness when I knew I had broken the promise to myself to never lay a hand on Lee before he had recuperated. Taking note of my perturbed state, he chuckled and patted the side of my face. The slight contact allayed my fears somewhat, but the guilt was still lodged in my mind, pestering me and eating at me. Something seemed wrong, but despite my efforts I could not see what it was. Had I been wrong in allowing such an action to take place between us? Had it felt like I was manipulating Lee's feelings with everything I made him do? Or perhaps it was the complete opposite…

Was _he_ manipulating me?

"If anything, the doctor was the one who encouraged me to do such a thing."

"Y-you're sure?"

"Yes…that and I felt like I needed to…I do not know, perhaps _give_ you something for all that you have done for me. It is not a form of compensation in any way Sakura…it is just…something that I have wanted to do for quite some time." He assured me. "But…are you…are you happy with what I have done?"

"S-sure, I suppose…but…are you sure you want to be with me? I don't mind if you simply decide to give me your friendship Lee."

"No." he demanded sharply as I was given a peck on my forehead. "I have been waiting to do this since I do not know how long Sakura. That is why…I will ask you again to please be my girlfriend!"

The last statement seemed oddly familiar to how he had asked me that the first time we had met. But this time there was no effusive grin, no optimistic thumbs up, no dauntless winking, just a simple earnest request.

"Can…can you please ask me that in a few more months?" I pleaded, honestly bemused in my answer.

Lee smiled, and while nodding, took hold of my hand and kissed the palm of it. He rested it against his cheek and leaned against it affectionately. I smiled back and wondered if I was slowly getting the old Lee back, the dorky, sweet, and clueless one. We seemed to stay like this for several moments, simply enjoying each other's presence. I wished to kiss him again, but wisely fought against the urge. It was _enough_. It was enough…just allowing this slight contact, no matter how paltry. It was enough that he never actually _said_ he loved me, although many times it was implied between us. It was enough that we would have our quarrels so long as we forgave each other in the end. It was _enough_ knowing he would still fight with his team as long as they had patience with him. It was _enough_. It was…

…enough.

My mind desperately tried to believe this fabrication.

I only sighed at its futility.

It was never enough, not for me. I had yet to see if the warning from the aged man was genuine or not. The mere thought of it made my heart drop to my stomach.

I continued to smile (or at least tried to) and leaned against this confusing man.

One thing I knew was certain.

So long as his father existed…

it would _never_ be enough.


	26. Odd Introductions and Actions

Hello alo!! And thank you for all your lovely, helpful, and motivating reviews and opinions! I hope everyone has had a safe and exciting summer. I have to apologize again since this has been the most I've taken to update. I ran into exams and had little time to start on this, not to mention I've been out of the country for a while. So again, I apologize for my belated chapter. Thank you, the reader, once more since there's no way I'd keep updating if it weren't for your help! I really hope you like this chapter since I feel I have lost quite a bit of my touch, but I will try harder! So without further ado: Read, Enjoy, and Recommend stuff to me! (p.s. For those wanting some interaction with Sakura's ever colorful teammates, I PROMISE the next chapter will focus on them, not to mention Lee's father will (_finally_) have a key part. I just couldn't fit them in here without making the chapter look long and tedious.) Sorry again.

**Odd Introductions and Actions**

The fan's bleak air traveled through my bare legs as I blew and waved my hands fervently at my feet. Nail polish persistently trickled down to my skin with the unforgivable weather outside my house. I peered out the window to see the sun had indefatigably decided to stay in the middle of sky, mocking us with its heat. The stridulating sounds of cicadas only broke up my thoughts. Grabbing my melting cup of ice cream, I devoured the remaining oozing lumps and set the dish back down. A second frozen confection not belonging to me had long turned into a lukewarm creamy soup. I continued to wave as much air to my half dried toenails until the light laughter of Tenten interrupted my frantic gushes of wind.

"You're going to have bubbles form inside the paint if you don't let it dry normally." She warned as she placed the last piece of an acetone drenched cotton ball on her fingernails to scrape off old paint.

I stuck my tongue out at her like a child and continued my actions to flout my complete disobedience.

"So how's life?"

"Bearable." She answered as she walked toward my place on the bed and sat behind me.

"OW!" I snapped, whimpering from my throbbing scalp when I realized she had begun to play with my hair.

"Sorry." She murmured as she continued to touch my hair. "It's really hard to put it up into two ponytails."

"Just do it like your hair." I suggested.

"I'm trying!"

"Try _harder_!"

I sighed in exasperation. What had _once_ started as a pleasant conversation over strangling techniques had soon erupted in a zealous Tenten wanting to color our nails and do other miscellaneous female leisure activities. It was not as though I minded, (it had been _ages_ since I had done this with someone other than Ino) but one could only paint their nails so many times until it grew tedious or vain.

"You'd look even cuter with some clothes that matched the hair style." She mumbled, trying eagerly to grab hold of my stray locks.

"So how was training with Gai Sensei?" I asked, my curiosity stirring from my last encounter with him and his student.

My friend answered me with a groan and motioned to give her a pin to hold my hair in place.

"You're hair is too fine for this, it doesn't want to stay up! Anyway, to say that it was 'awkward' doesn't _begin_ to describe the situation!" she puled as she slapped her hand against her face.

She quickly finished her task and handed me a mirror before occupying herself with my nail polish.

(It seemed Tenten was more feminine than _I_ was when it came to cosmetics and hairstyles.)

"Was it _that_ bad?" I asked, wondering how that Sensei of theirs had handled his students.

"Worse! Neji wouldn't talk AT ALL, even when we spoke to him! He kept glaring at who Lee kept wandering from place to place trying to avoid us! I think I was the only one who actually _listened_ to a word Gai Sensei said. Not that what he said made any _sense_." She grumbled.

The polish exuded into the crevice between my skin and nail, forcing me to grab the acetone to give up the futile struggle.

"Don't remove it!" Tenten all but scolded like my mother. "The red nail polish really suits you."

"It's getting all over the place." I responded tiredly as I placed the bottle down. "So how did you guys get to talking again?"

"Well, Gai Sensei just started rambling about how 'we hit some rocks, but our squad shall not be broken!' even _he_ seemed nervous from seeing us together again." She responded with a bored face. "It reminded me when we barely became genin."

"Why?"

"Sensei _insisted_ on introducing ourselves again so as to have a 'clean start!'" She mimicked her teacher's boastful voice. "Anyway, I don't want to talk about it. What are your plans for today?"

"Well," my face seemed to brighten when I recalled my agenda, "I'm finally going to see Lee again after all these weeks."

Her eyes perked in interest. "What _has_ he been doing? Even Neji won't tell me, he just gives me an angry look and shrugs." She grumbled while crossing her arms. "He's so stringent with me."

"Be more _tender_ with him then," I joked before I dodged the pillow Tenten had flung at me. Her fecund dislike for the Hyuga had apparently grown more evident as time had passed, but I failed to see why the corners of her lips seemed to ascend if her professed sentiments toward him were true. "Well, if you really want to know, let's ask him together. Want to come?" I offered as I began to pick clothes from my closet.

My friend nearly snorted and rested her whole body on my bed.

"And be a third wheel? No thanks."

"You won't be a third wheel, you know that." I tried to assuage the possible scenario. "We'll find a friend in the village and ask him to tag along so you won't feel awkward. Who knows? He might be _cute_." I pointed out in hopes of making her eager to join me.

Tenten clambered her body to the headrest of the front of the bed, making sure to never lose sight of my face. She gave me the impression of a docile child hesitant to voice out its thoughts. Her reticent nature had placed me on edge, but I waited patiently to hear her response. A frown graced her features, followed by her dropping back down on my bed with a forlorn sigh. I grew distraught from her bizarre behavior, stopping briefly from my quest to find clothes, but continued looking when I realized she was going to say no more on the matter. While I wondered if I should just wear my usual shoes, Tenten's sudden grousing of incoherent words made my brow twitch.

"WHAT!?" I barked, obviously exhausted from her enigmatic actions.

The woman turned her back to the bed, using my pillow to arch her neck and stare at me upside-down. She bit her lip, but decided to open her mouth.

"You know if I wasn't your friend, I'd really hate you…or at the very least be jealous of you." She uttered as she turned over once more and landed on her belly.

I stopped midway through rummaging my clothes, bemused from her unwonted remark, and turned to face her. "What are you talking about?"

"You have…lots of friends…not to mention…a lot of _guys_ who care for you." Were her slowly chosen words.

Laughter rose from my lungs at the sight of her sullen face.

"How can you say that? It's those kinds of situations that end up with battered relationships and pain in all parties involved." I assured.

"Yeah, but you know how much you wanted Sasuke when you were little. _Everyone_ wanted him and they _still_ do. Now he offers himself up to you and you won't even give him the time of day." She grumbled.

"Crushes fade away Tenten…" I replied softly, "and anyway, after he left I knew I could never be with him with the needy way I acted around him."

"And what about Naruto?"

Her question was simple, yet why had it made me nonplussed to the various answers?

"What about him? After saving Konoha, he could have a different girl everyday for _all_ fifty-two weeks of the year." I muttered quickly.

"But he _doesn't_. Don't you think that's…weird?"

"What are you getting at?"

"Well the only one he's always with is…nevermind, forget it…" she quickly changed topic and jumped off the bed.

"But-"

"I said 'forget it' Sakura, it's probably nothing." She repeated with a wave of her hand. "What time do you have to leave anyway?"

My eyes widened in alarm when I snatched my clock from my dresser and noticed it was already past six.

"I was supposed to meet him _by_ six!" I exclaimed, scrambling to put on my shoes and usual clothes.

Tenten giggled and began to search for her shoes as well. "You're always late for _everything_ Sakura."

"Shut up!" I nearly commanded as I jerked the fabric of her shirt and ran down the stairs.

With trembling fingers, I grabbed my house keys and stuffed them in my pocket, sprinting back to my door.

'_I'm not going to hear the end of it once I see Lee.' _I mentally whined.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A stifled snicker.

A silencing smack on the back.

"For once-"

"Shut up, you've said it already."

"But of _all_ the days for him to be late _too_!" Tenten could barely manage to keep her laughter in check. "He probably decided to not show up at all Sakura!" she teased.

Her ceaseless taunting had done nothing to stop my incensed mood.

"I told you to SHUT UP Tenten!" I hissed while slamming both my flattened hands on the tiny table.

She held her arms up in mock surrender and pretended to quake from my wrath. For a woman who was portrayed by me as being mature and _thoughtful_, she was a rather nefarious individual once I got to know her. A terrified looking waiter had warily taken our orders and had swiftly returned with our drinks (presumably out of fear of being engulfed in my scorn.) I growled in resentment and tried to sip my soda without any further giggles directed at me. Tenten balanced her head on her hands as her elbows rested on the table, giving me an amused smirk. An ominous glare was enough to wipe it off before she innocently began to drink from her soda as well. It was then that I decided that I would have to start looking for a new love interest.

Because I was going to _kill_ Lee once he got here.

"He's such a jerk." I said irritably.

Tenten only smiled.

"He really has changed a lot…that Lee. He was…well, _fanatical_ about time, now I'm starting to believe those were all traits derived from our Sensei." She commented softly.

I glanced over at her and wondered about her odd comment.

"How was he like…when you first met him? Before he knew me, before he met _Gai_?" I asked, suddenly feeling like it was the ideal time to bring Lee's former life into our conversation.

"Well, he was always sweet- that characteristic was _always_ there with him…but he _was_ awkward, noisy, hot-blooded, dorky, _and_ a hopeless case among our graduating group." She finished as though the adjectives had been listed verbatim in his ninja info card.

"So Gai helped him change?" I asked, waiting like an impatient child eager for the climax of a story.

"Well, the progress he made in school wasn't until he met our Sensei, so I suppose so. But…I guess we all had something to do with it." She admitted sympathetically.

"What do you mean?"

"He was teased at school…a _lot_, people- even teachers- always telling him he'd never amount to a ninja. I guess we all pushed him…he wanted to become someone else so desperately that when we pushed him into a corner he molded himself after the first person who paid any attention to him."

I moved uncomfortably in my seat at this slow confession. I swallowed and let my head slowly bow down to stare at my empty can, my conscience ashamed of having pried into Lee's life once more. Had his childhood academy been as austere as his father's treatment? It seemed anywhere Lee had turned he had been shunned and ridiculed his whole life, leaving no one to care for him. Rubbing my eyes to rid myself of the stinging sensation, I faced Tenten again and tried to muster a smile. Lee had never given up, had never expressed any signs of weakness in front of other people…I didn't pity him…

I almost envied him.

Tenten blinked several times, her mind at a stalemate from trying to figure out why I was grinning.

"Well anyway, I'm just glad I got to know him….I'm glad we became his friends. Neji might not admit it, but I'm sure he thinks so too."

"Well…I'm glad he has friends that care for him like you…I should know more than anyone that bonds like that are not too easily broken."

"What kind of bonds?" asked someone not included in our talk.

Tenten jumped from her seat and I nearly shrieked at the sudden intrusive soft voice coming from behind us.

I turned around, ready to smack Lee for coming late or beat whoever dared to interrupt our conversation (it didn't really mattered who came first). My urge, however, had to wait when I questioned a deathly pale hand in front of my face.

"Hello Sakura." Someone greeted politely with his hand before limply setting it back down to his side.

I scrunched my nose as though not being to notice the stranger at first, his colorless features forgotten from my missions since Sasuke's return.

"…Sai!" I exclaimed from the somewhat pleasant surprise.

After several moments of silent enervated stares I decided to grumble a dry "…Hi…" in return.

Sai, being the ever garrulous individual, responded with silence once more.

"So ah…what brings you here?" I asked awkwardly when I realized he was alone.

Before the boy even had a chance to speak, Tenten immediately pounced on the chance to meet this new mysterious ninja.

"Hi, I'm Sakura's friend, are you her friend too?"

"Oh, this is Sai." I said dully with a small belittling motion of my hand. At the moment, cajoling Tenten into coughing up more crucial information on Lee's life like a desperate girlfriend seemed more interesting than presenting someone as droning as _him_.

"Hello Sai, nice to meet you." She seemed to completely eschew my choice of topic and instead focused her attention to the pale boy in front of her.

Sai presented her with a smile that had grown almost habitual whenever he met new people and raised his hand in greeting again. He placed his index finger against his chin, closing his eyes as he studied Tenten in meditation. His analyzing unopened eyes unnerved me in a manner that seemed _all_ too familiar to me.

'_Oh god…he __**wouldn't**__.__**'**_ I silently begged him to not conjure up another one of his horrendous and brutally scalding 'affectionate' nicknames.

"It's nice to meet you too…Tenten." He replied as his smile slowly dissipated back into his listless features.

I allowed a breath of anticipation to leave my lungs when I realized he had actually learned _tact_.

"How do you know Sakura?" my friend implored to know more about him all while unsuspectingly treading farther into her own doom.

"Lady Tsunade placed me in their team as Sasuke's substitute on a few missions…." The silence that followed made me nibble my lip in terror of his sheer impertinence. "…that is how I came to know Sakura…" his listless eyes lit up as though conjuring a brilliant idea and I could have sworn I had chomped through my lip.

The conclusion of every sentence brought the possibility of allowing him more time to think of a nickname for my gullible female friend.

'_You better not Sai…you __**better**__ not. I will seriously knock you unconscious if you call Tenten anything stupid.' _

"Do you usually go on missions with team seven?" she inquired as she offered him to take a seat next to us.

I inwardly cried out in enragement.

"Not usually, if anything it is only when Sasuke or Naruto is busy on another mission." He answered almost dismally.

"Ah, so then you don't have your own team?" Tenten's expression seemed to the point of being grief-stricken as she looked at the unconcerned boy in front of us.

"I have lots of teams." He answered simply as he continued to tap his chin in thought.

My teeth clenched at the slew of horrible, false, and embellished names the idiot could create for his new unwary victim.

"I think I will call you…Tight Buns."

It was _nearly_ expected that Hinata would blush as Sai nicknamed her "big chested" upon meeting her, it was _nearly_ predictable that Ino would blush in delight as Sai (unfortunately) nicknamed her "gorgeous", and it was _nearly_ natural for me to punch his teeth out when he nicknamed me an "ugly dog"…but…Tenten's reaction…was quite spontaneous and bizarre.

She…laughed.

She _laughed_.

"What was that for? Are you usually this random Sai?" She said as she brought a gentle hand up to her lips.

Her pleasant expression, however, soon turned to one of trepidation as she witnessed my fist nearly cracking the boy's jaw as it made direct contact and sent him flying to a nearby wall.

Ah yes, Mistress Tsunade had trained her student well in the face of perverts.

"You IDIOT! How DARE you talk about my friend's ass like she was a piece of mea-"

"Sakura-"

"Not now Tenten, I'm defending your honor!" I snapped back as I cupped my fist in my other hand and cracked my knuckles.

I noticed Sai had stood up and was currently rubbing his maltreated cheek, appearing bewildered by my actions. Noticing his pitiful stance, I scoffed and charged at him. If the perv was prepared for a second beating I knew I would be _more_ than happy to accommodate him.

"Sakura, he was talking about my HAIR!" Tenten nearly screeched as she made a frantic jump to pull my body away from the confused boy.

"_What_?!" I yelled, my fury exacerbating my urge to punch him, "What are you _blind_!? We all knew the jerk was looking at-"

"My _HAIR_!" Tenten repeated as she tried fervently to correct my mistake.

"Eh?"

As though explaining it to a naïve child, I wanted to smack _myself_ in the face when both the abused Sai and panicking Tenten pointed their index fingers to her obvious daily choice of hairstyle.

"Oh…_OH_!" Sweet realization had finally jerked me from my frenzy. "Oh, jeeze Sai, I'm so _sorry_!" I exclaimed and apologized for my first time I had needlessly wrecked someone who had not deserved it.

Tenten hopelessly sighed and helped him up, shooting me a berating look as we retreated back into the booth where the stares of strangers weren't boring into our skin. I sunk into my seat, the ignominy staining my burning face while we placed our order. Sai now seemed to cringe whenever his eyes met my own so I assumed he had learned his lesson. I laughed nervously while I waved off the tension between us. It was rather guiltily that I had, through classical conditioning, forced Sai to interpret making nicknames as the equivalent of getting punched across the face. I made a mental note to make it up to him if I ever got the chance.

"I take it making new friends is very painful for you?" Tenten asked with one last slating glare directed at me as she handed him an ice cube wrapped around a napkin for his face.

"Yes…rather." He concurred all while flinching under my gaze.

Fear, anguish, and suspicion: I suppose one _could_ say I was _helping_ him understand more feelings.

He tried to escape my view and continued speaking with his new (and much more amicable) friend. "I read in a book that the quickest way to make friends is by acting warm and informal towards them or even giving them a nickname that represents their characteristics." He explained.

Tenten leaned her elbows on the table and supported her chin in the palm of one hand, looking in interest at the boy's odd reasoning. She gave him a warm smile, her genial disposition facilitating Sai's comfort around us. The mood had soon turned convivial as she encouraged her new friend to voice his thoughts freely without me having to strike him. He returned the smile, one that made me wonder whether it was nothing more than a mere reflection of what Tenten was doing or a rare moment of expression.

"So you gave me my nickname based on my…hair?" she asked with a puzzled face as she twirled a few iridescent strands from her buns.

"Correct." He responded dryly.

"You know, you can make friends a lot faster if you don't give them nicknames when you first meet them. They'll think you're weird!" she proposed while sipping at her soft drink.

Sai's almond shaped eyes widened a bit in comprehension. "Ah, is that so? But _then_ how will I make them my friend?"

"You can't expect someone to become that close to you in a mere _greeting_." She teased as her eyes scanned nervously through a menu. "I remember one of my teammates didn't even know I was in the same year as he was until we ended up working together." She added, but gave no inkling as to the identity of the 'teammate'.

The Roots member absorbed all of the kunoichi's wisdom like an attentive school boy as he placed the chilly napkin against his face. His mouth was curved into a small round circle that confirmed his unconditional interest toward the subject. Eyes followed her facial expressions and even the slightest movement of her fingers as she grasped a straw to sip her drink. I never would have thought Tenten to act so natural or even therapeutic to someone as socially retarded as Sai (then again, she had two _very_ disturbed men on her team.) I silently began to pray that Lee would get here soon since I was starting to feel like my prior actions had alienated me from the conversation.

"And how long will it take if I utilize the method you propose?" Sai asked as though they were two scientists debating to test different theories for research.

"Well it will certainly take a lot less time than if you used _your_ way." She advised. "Besides, what's the hurry? You've got your whole life to make someone your friend! The longer it takes you to call a person your friend the longer you get to know them."

"Hm, there is logic in what you say." He said meditatively as he imitated Tenten's actions and took a straw for himself. "Did you earn many friends doing this?"

"Well, I'm not going to say I'm very popular, but I'm happy with the friends I have made so far." She answered, a bit discomfited when the topic shifted to her.

"Is Naruto your friend?"

"Of course!"

"Is Hinata your friend?"

"Well-yes, but-"

"Is Ino your friend?"

"I-well…"

"How long did it take you and Sakura to become friends?"

Both of us had to laugh at his sudden inquisitiveness as he gave us a confused look.

"Well…" Tenten seemed all but intimidated by the question as she glanced at me. "I uh-"

"I kind of met her when her team took the Chunin exam with my age group, but we didn't start hanging out together until the Hokage passed the legislation for separate teams to train together." I explained, already a bit piqued from his incessant talking.

'_Man, it's like he's making up for all the years he __**didn't**__ talk!' _

"Ah, and how did Tenten first-"

"Oh, thank god you're here!" I loudly interrupted Sai's heated questioning once I caught a glimpse of Lee's dark hair through the immense crowd.

Violently waving my arms about in hopes of fastening his languorous pace, I was tortured with each time-consuming step he took. Thankful for someone to distract me from Sai's talking, he appeared through the densely populated streets and continued to make his way toward me. My rescuer, however, was not alone since I noticed he had a certain pale eyed Hyuga prodigy in tow. The men wore bitter faces that seemed directed at each other whenever their eyes met, but I thought it preferable not to ask what was bothering them.

'_Great, one more guy Lee can talk to and __**still**__ make me feel left out from the group.'_ I mentally complained when I realized Tenten would continue talking to Sai and Lee would probably start bickering about some triviality with Neji.

I found myself dreading each step both ninja took until they stood facing me.

"Well hello Tenten and Sakura!" Lee nearly beamed at our sight, a bit grateful from abandoning his grim teammate and ruffling my hair (much to my dismay). After his courteous greeting he stopped to stare in askance at the man sitting beside Tenten in the booth.

As if sensing the unwanted tension, Sai immediately opened his mouth to speak.

"H-hello." He managed to say while under the curious gaze.

His anomalous behavior surprised me since he was never one to become tense under pressure. I watched in amusement as the boy who stood collected even while facing death now succumbed to vulnerability with a group of three new people.

'_I haven't seen him this nervous since he tried to hug Naruto.'_ I nearly laughed at the memory but forced it back down.

Lee gave him a smile, allowing my worried teammate to relax. "Hello, my name is Lee and this…" he motioned to his friend with a halfhearted jerk of his thumb, "is Neji. Are you a friend of Sakura's?" he asked cordially.

Sai nodded and attempted to give his usual smile at Neji, who, of course, rebuffed it with his attitude.

Neji squandered no time in petty greetings. His omniscient eyes had already pierced, exposed, and studied Sai long before Lee had even _noticed_ he was sitting next to us. He was all but glaring at him at this point, (the reason why was unknown to me).

His smile soon faltered when he realized Lee's "friend" was not in a loquacious mood. A tint of sympathy adulterated my annoyance for the pallid boy, if only for a brief moment. He scratched his cheek with an uneasy index finger as a furtive bead of sweat formed at the side of his face. Probably wondering what he had done to receive such a hostile look from Neji, Tenten instantly came to the rescue to ward off any further awkward moments with the men.

"Lee, Neji, this is Sai, a friend of group seven. Sai, these are my teammates that I told you about!" she chirped.

The tension was quickly extirpated as Lee smiled, extending his hand to shake, and Neji emitted a low guttural sound that I could only assume was his "friendly" salutation (with him I could never say).

"Sakura, is this the person who helped you retrieve Sasuke on your first failed mission with Naruto?" Lee asked as he released Sai's hand.

I nodded (slightly popping a vein at the blunt description of the result of said mission) and motioned for both standing men to sit. One stool was still conveniently placed next to Sai and two stood on my left side, I already knew Lee would sit next to me (god help him if he didn't) so I pondered where Neji would opt to sit.

"I have heard you are extremely agile and resourceful Sai." As usual, Lee's genuine praise was present when he sat beside me and gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

This seating method left me trapped in the middle of Tenten and him, so I waited expectantly to see if Neji would pick the seat next to Lee or Sai (two men whose chances of socializing with were slim). I tried to keep back a chuckle as I saw the acerbic face both men had when they gave each other one last glance. It had become an easy task to figure out whether the Hyuga was in an amicable mood or not judging from his proximity to his teammates. If Tenten was close by, it was likely he had fought with Lee and vice versa. In the time I had gotten used to him, Neji had actually become _predictable_ instead of being the usual enigma he was to most people.

Without hesitation, he sat next to Sai, promptly crossing his arms. As if to further implicate his mood, he irately shoved his hands inside the long sleeves of his robe and kept silent.

Sai, somewhat puzzled with Neji, seemed incapable of speech when it came to answering Lee's compliment until Tenten nudged his side.

"Say something!" she mumbled under her breath.

I had to roll my eyes considering Lee was about two _feet_ away from her.

Sai whispered something to Tenten, gently cupping her ear so as not involve our hearing range. The laughter that erupted from her following his hushed words made me quirk an eyebrow at their sudden…"confidence" in each other. It caused Neji to have a similar reaction as well.

All I heard from the private conversation was something along the lines of "…read…book…compliments…try…".

I decided not to ask and opted to roll my eyes once more at their unusual behavior.

"Go ahead, go ahead!" she whispered hurriedly.

"A-and I have…ah, heard that you, also, are very strong." He blurted out in hopes of earning Lee's friendship.

This, he somewhat achieved when Lee smiled in return and tried to brush off the remark.

"Be assured that it is nothing compared to what _I_ have heard of _your_ skills!"

"Ah no, I've heard that your brute strength and masculine physique are only matched by Sakura's."

While I contemplated the left-handed compliment as Lee doubled over in laughter, my idiot of a substitute comrade made a fatal move. Thinking he was already on a roll, Sai turned to Neji and tried ardently to win him over as a friend as well.

"I heard that you too are very dexterous in your abilities Neji, I _also_ heard you got beaten up by Naruto in the Chunin exams though." He said, the fool apparently proud of voicing his thoughts.

At this, Tenten found herself inching away from Neji.

Lee exploded in a new wave of laughter.

Neji's left eye twitched profusely.

(And I swore to pretend I didn't know Sai next time I saw him in public.)

Having been in our designated seats, we eventually began to order. To add to Tenten's utter bliss, Sai had decided to stay to continue what he _apparently_ thought was a captivating talk. Completely disregarding the fact that Neji was now being eschewed in the chat, she turned her head over to her new friend, giving him her undivided attention. She smiled often, allowing her giggles to flow freely whenever Sai asked another odd question. Her lips tentatively touched her straw before speaking, hands and fingers languidly wrapped around her cup showed her relaxed position, and small yet inconspicuous leans toward him implicated her growing attention.

I grew confused at the sight, but quickly collected my thoughts when I felt a slight poke on the side of my forehead.

"You look distracted." Lee whispered into my ear. "Is something the matter?"

I shook my head, patting the place he had touched and smiled. "Everything's all right. So what have you been up to? It's been a while since I've seen you." I murmured back so as to not involve the group.

The man lifted his cup to his lips and uninterestedly took a drink.

"Well, I have a surprise for you actually."

"Surprise?" I asked, curiosity evident in my widened eyes. "What is it?!" my voice nearly grew shrill with the sheer anticipation.

"The reason why I have not paid you a visit…is because I was moving my things into my new apartment." He replied with an almost proud tone.

My eyes blinked vacantly several times as I tried to absorb what he had said. I was aware that it would only be a matter of time until he was allowed to live alone again, but the mere notion was one I had preferred to ignore. There was an infinitesimal stab of fear that shot through my senses as Lee's eyes met my own and noticed their absolute shock. He sighed and stroke the top of my hand to assuage my feelings. It was in vain since what the psychiatrist's had portended was still fresh in my memory.

'_Even after all this time…after all the therapy, talks, and medication…would you still be willing to kill yourself or go after your father?' _

The question failed to take a verbal form as Lee released my hand and stared impassively at his tea.

"There is also another thing I wish to speak to you about Sakura. I know…that what I am about to ask you might sound a bit…compromising …" his eyes turned back to me as he took a breath, "will you please accompany me to my old apartment? There are some things I wish to retrieve from there."

I swallowed something that resembled a rock down my throat while I ruminated on the bizarre question. Thoughts of our first encounter gushed into my mind and nearly shook every muscle in my body. Would I be willing to go back to where I found and fought Lee?

"-Of course, it is absolutely fine if you do not wish to go." He added speedily after his request. "In fact, I do not even know why I asked such a stupid question-disregard it."

"I don't mind." I blurted out without being fully aware of it. "I want…I _need_ to go eventually anyway."

I cringed at my own idiotic response and wished I had taken back my words. The painful realization of returning to that horrid bloody apartment dawned on me, making my shoulders droop in misery. Was there _anything_ I wouldn't do for this fool?

"…Thank you…" the reply, though laconic, sounded both relieved and nervous as Lee gave me a smile. "I…thank you."

"By the way…is…is Neji all right with this?" was the first question that popped into my head once I brushed the horror to the back of my mind.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I mean, is he _okay_ with the concept of you living alone again?"

Lee scoffed and finished his tea with an angry swig. "No, I am afraid he is rather paranoid about it and both debated and opposed Lady Hokage's decision."

"Ah." I responded curtly and let my eyes wander to his teammate.

This brought about yet another inquiry.

"Not that I have anything against it but…is Neji…_okay_?" I asked in a hushed voice.

"Again, you confuse me Sakura. Explain." Lee reprimanded like an older brother and ordered more tea.

"I mean…it's just weird to see him hanging out with us." I grumbled, growing agitated from his carping.

"Ah yes, well he has been keeping an eye on me for the past two days actually."

I quietly glanced at Neji again, who appeared unfazed by the sudden isolation he was receiving from Tenten. He took a drink from his tea, returned his hand to his robe, and continued to stare at seemingly nothing in front of him.

For a moment I thought he had fallen into a deep meditative state with his eyes open.

Perhaps it was the soda I had been drinking that constricted my chest, or perhaps it was the airless ambiance that surrounded me, but for whatever reason, I felt an insatiable urge to talk in an attempt to mentally bring Neji into the group.

"So…Lee…how are you?" I asked loudly enough to interrupt the discussion between my two friends and seize Neji's attention.

The man in the midst of taking a drink from his cup gave me a questioning look for my sudden thunderous voice asking something he had already answered, but contemplated an answer anyway to humor me.

"How am I? I am tolerably well I suppose…" he responded awkwardly, giving me another puzzled face regarding what to do next. "And…how are you Sakura?"

"Fine, but what have you been up to with _Neji_? I'm sure the two of you have gotten even closer while living together." My question was both hopeful and wary since the different outcomes of it were endless.

Out of the corner of my eye I could see Tenten frantically moving a straight horizontal hand across her neck to end my meddling.

'Shut…it!' she seemed to silently form the syllables in her mouth.

"I have actually been trying to get him _away_ from me." Was Lee's cheery answer. "Although it _is_ flattering to have my own personal stalker I think I prefer to-"

I violently cut Lee off by slamming my foot against his ankle underneath the table. Avoiding any unnecessary conflicts between the two was my priority. A muffled and pained grunt was enough to silence him. He shot me a dirty look as he set his head down and hunched his back over the unbearable pain.

"And how are _you_ Neji?" My sweet question was now directed at the Hyuga since I knew Lee was prone to rousing the embers from their previous fight.

"I am fine thank you…" He answered dully. It was the end to a clash that was apparently about to take place and I gave a sigh of reprieve, thankful that Gai's team had at least _one_ mature person in it.

"…-that is, until Lee decided he was fit to live alone and-"

Both Tenten and I groaned almost simultaneously when even _Neji_ would not give up a chance to quarrel.

"-because I am ready." Lee added with a pained whimper from his beaten knee before taking a swig of the drink.

"That seems impossible to believe with _your_ current behavior." Neji answered offhandedly.

"My 'behavior' is only provoked whenever _you_ start talking like that."

The sashay of rejoinders and insults both mystified and fascinated Sai as he turned his head over each time one of the men snapped back with an insult more scalding than the last. He seemed to be enjoying this poor example of two comrades interacting with one another. Tenten looked ready to snap both of her teammates' necks judging from the way she keenly rubbed the sides of her head to warn off a headache. I only _wished_ I could relate since even _my_ teammates had stopped reverting to an onslaught of verbal abuse to settle their frustrations. I was penitent over not heeding her warning when I had the chance, now we would have to endure their petty fight.

"What are you so afraid of Neji?! Stop trying to control me!"

"Apparently I have to since you cannot control _yourself_."

"Both of you SHUT UP!" Tenten finally shrieked, "We can't even have a decent conversation without you fighting!"

Neji and Lee glared at her.

Sai gave us his usual smile.

And I swore never to make two men speak again.

'_What am I, stupid? I know how Naruto and Sasuke get, why did I think Neji and Lee would act any different?' _I reprimanded myself.

And that was my wonderful evening.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

By the time we took our leave, both teammates had (somewhat) created a truce that was probably as fragile as glass. Neither talked, but I had hoped I had at least helped them vent a bit. We had managed to finish our meals with an absence of arguments and that was all that really mattered at this point. Tenten stood beside me wearing a rather tormented and tired face as she waved goodbye at Sai and the Hyuga. Mustering the same eagerness Naruto usually depicted in his farewells, Sai smiled and waved back while the latter teammate barely acknowledged the motion as he began to walk.

"Are you ready?" Lee whispered while I waited on Tenten to stop waving (it seemed both of them wanted to prolong this action for as long as they could.)

"Sure." I replied uneasily before returning my scowl at the girl a few feet in front of me. "Come _on_ Tenten!" I whined, "Stop waving like you won't see him for years!"

She flinched at her obviously bizarre behavior, allowing her hand to automatically drop to her side as she ran back to us.

"I can't help it! He's just so interesting!" she whispered excitedly in my ear. "He's so unique and cool looking!"

I flinched when these unexpected comments reached my ears and warded them off with a slap to my forehead. "Just…come on."

"I still don't know why I have to have _Lee_ walk me home." She said gloomily, innocently placing her hands behind her back.

"Because Neji is currently busy with other issues and I would not be able to call myself a man if I allowed a complete stranger accompany you." Lee answered logically.

"He's not a complete _stranger_! He's…nice." she defended quietly as she walked beside us.

Was that an amorous sigh I had heard at the end of her words?

"You forgot to mention he's also weird." I teased while I dodged a smack from her. "_Please_ tell me you do realize Sai is a walking mirror? All he does is mimic what he hears or reads."

"No he isn't! He seemed really nice and sincere!"

Lee's burst of chuckles roused a fiery cayenne color from his female teammate. One of his rare grins spread across his features as he ran his fingers through his black hair.

"It seems I have finally met someone more apathetic than Neji." He said as he stuck both hands in his pockets.

"Are you telling me even _Neji_ looks human compared to him?" Tenten asked, arms akimbo and ready to defend her new friend.

"We're saying Neji looks like a damn overemotional adolescent compared to Sai!" I exclaimed, reveling in the teasing.

"He-he's not!" she stammered nervously.

"Did you like him?"

"NO!" she yelled back at my odd question.

"Then why are you acting like this?" I asked with an insinuating look.

"…He's just very nice…" she grumbled, looking desperately for her apartment.

"'Nice'?" Lee repeated.

"Yes, _nice_." She replied curtly before stopping behind us. "And I think I'll take it from here, there's something I forgot to do. Man you guys are _annoying_ when you're together." She pointed out.

"Are you sure you will not allow us to keep you company until you reach your apartment?" he asked with a smile, a tint of his taunting nature still drenching his voice as he placed a hand over Tenten's head. His mountainous tall frame nearly towered over her, making her look like a child to anyone's glimpse.

"Yes, I'm _positive_." Tenten answered as she playfully pushed Lee out of the way and began walking in a different direction than us in the labyrinth-like neighborhood. "Now shut up and bug Sakura for a change."

"I will be sure to do just that." Lee assured as he grabbed my hand and pulled. "Take care Tenten."

Her answer was silenced by the wind that wheezed through the desolate streets overwhelming us at every turn. It was a miracle how Tenten could navigate herself though such sinuous paths.

"Do you still want to go?"

Lee's question whispered into the shell of my ear froze my blood white. I automatically clenched his hand and shakily nodded my head, not knowing how else to respond. A demanding yet lenient force swiftly turned my face over to Lee. His fingers had cupped my chin, facilitating the movement as my eyes encountered his. He held on firmly, never allowing my head or eyes to falter away from his gaze. I bit the bottom of my lips, wondering what was running through his mind as his fingers gently released me.

"Sakura…if you do not want to go then I will not force you." Was his calm statement.

"I _want_ to go." I answered nervously.

"I do not want to make you feel obligated just because I asked you."

"I don't feel _obligated_!" I assured, "I'm just…scared."

At this odd remark, Lee thought it appropriate to chuckle.

"Shut up." I snapped.

"I am not saying anything."

"You _implied_ it."

"Implied what?"

I nearly growled in annoyance at his superficially innocent demeanor and spitefully threw his hand away from my own. Lee seemed unnerved from my probably predictable behavior and followed suit as I practically stomped toward his apartment to prove my trepidation (and quaking legs) wrong to him. His calm and indolent footsteps tapping the pavement were a stark contrast to my own hasty and flustering ones as we continued to walk in silence. I knew it would only be a matter of time before one of us spoke, but I decided to be mulish about it. I bit my tongue to prevent myself to be the _usual_ one to both begin _and_ break the silence. At times, I feared Lee knew me better than anyone- even my teammates-, since he waited patiently for me to start talking again to him at the end of our fights.

I hated that about him.

"So what do you think Tenten's 'business' was?" I finally asked, not letting my own dignity come out intact from our brawl.

"Perhaps a word with Neji?" he supposed jadedly.

"I don't think so, knowing her, she probably went off to spend more time with Sai." I tried not to giggle while I said this.

"You might never know, perhaps she really _did_ have some business to attend to with Neji." The man behind me said quietly.

I almost snorted as I halted my walking long enough for Lee to catch up with me. "Not likely, she seems to be more interested in the socially awkward and inept guys, not the cold and tedious type." I joked.

He chuckled quietly and slowly entwined his fingers around mine anew. "I do not think so. I would like to think a man like Neji would judge himself to be better suited for Tenten."

Lee smiled, his eyes appearing downcast for a moment before continuing to pull my hand. My eyes widened when I heard the casual and almost terse remark made by the man who once loathed said teammate not even a few moments ago. Perhaps he was finally recanting his feelings toward his teammate, albeit the idea seemed improbable with the way they acted toward each other. Still…the mere possibility of such a pedantic boy like Neji _ever_ intriguing a woman like Tenten was almost…laughable. It was not to say the Hyuga lacked physical attractiveness or skill in his current occupation (he had a _surplus_ of that), but Tenten herself had confessed to me how she would abhor to be with someone such as him. To me, the possibility of them being together was…_bleak_.

"I will have to tell you not to repeat this odd comment." Lee pointed out as he noticed my expression.

"Why? It's not like you were _serious_ or anything." I muttered with a desultory chuckle.

My laughter was cut short when I received no answer.

Realization, shock, and probably the most crucial point in the conversation emerged on me: curiosity.

"Wait…Neji doesn't…_does_ he?" I asked, already my inquisitive nature besting me.

Lee's expression remained unreadable as he made an abrupt stop.

"We are here."

I shaded my eyes from the stinging streetlights as I raised my head to look up at the tall building. My curiosity for the barely excavated subject was lost inside my mind as I stared at what was in front of me. A few lit windows littered the monstrosity of the complex, giving it an eerie glow that only intensified once we drew nearer to the entrance. Lee's assuring rubs against my hand did nothing to calm my senses once we were inside the creaking musty building. A lone bead of sweat leached though the side of my face as he pulled me up the stairs.

"Come on."

After what seemed an endless flight of winding stairs, we stood facing a door plastered with blocking seals and a medley of protective tapes hindering our entrance inside his apartment. Lee ripped and deactivated them with ease with a few hand seals and minute amount of strength as he kicked open the obstinate door. A puff of dust erupted from the abrupt movement, making both of us cough and rub away at our eyes.

"You couldn't have been a _bit_ more silent could you? What kind of ninja are you?" I hacked out.

Lee once again answered me with silence as he wandered for the light switch. A few clicks told us the lights were nonexistent in his old home.

"Lee what are you-?"

Gravity gave way to an unbearable sense of pain and anguish as I felt my face slam nose first into his wooden floor.

"Sakura!?"

Though his features were indistinguishable in the dark room, Lee's tone possessed alarm and fear when the loud sound of my body crashing reached his ears.

A metallic substance exuded from my nose and trickled into my mouth, nearly making me gag and choke as it found its way to my tongue and forced me to taste it.

"Are you okay!?" Lee's voice exclaimed while I heard some fidgeting in the room.

A swift click and an orb of light pointing at me made me realize there was a small puddle of blood where my face had landed. I covered my nose, trying to block out the numbing pain that throbbed each time I breathed through my nostrils. The tube of light that permeated the room originated from a tiny flashlight the man held in his hands as he kneeled beside me and handed me a cloth to stop the bleeding.

"What happened?"

"I…fell." I responded stupidly.

"Well, I know _that_ much." He replied bluntly as he gently held the cloth in place.

"Ow…what was that?" I complained as I looked around for the cause of my clumsiness. I took Lee's flashlight away from him and continued to search for the object that had caused so much bodily torment.

A dyed out abandoned green jumpsuit greeted me before the flashlight landed on the floor from my shocked hand.

"I-it…it-it's your…jum…jumpsuit." I stuttered as I stared on what my feet had tripped.

I stooped to my knees, bowing my head down in curiosity at clothing before I realized it was not the only thing on the floor. My heart sped frenziedly as I looked at rest of the littered possessions, trying to calmly study the rest of the things I had callously dropped that night. A key, a red headband, and legwarmers. My hands began to quake when I began to pick up the legwarmers. I felt Lee's eyes upon me when I noticed their soft fabric was speckled with a thin dry crust of blood, no doubt from his last return. My fingers instantly refused the warmers like an unwanted gift and let them drop back down to the powdery floor. The jettisoned materials were untouched and covered in dust, seemingly waiting for someone's return.

"You _dropped_ them before you left?" his question held the tone of someone who was almost upset.

"What was I _supposed_ to do? Take them and keep them in my room like some sick souvenir to remember a dead person?" I callously asked back.

My fingers traveled over the rest of the materials before stopping above a cool piece of metal.

It was the key he had given me before he left.

"Why did you give me the key to your apartment? Were you expecting me to come back or something?" The inquiry appeared more like a statement as I looked over my back to stare at the blackened figure of Lee.

"I do not know. Perhaps I just wanted someone-_anyone_ to know what I was going to do."

I gently began to pick up the things not tainted by his dry blood. My head still ached each time I bent down to reach them.

"Stop that." I heard Lee say as he took the headband away from my hand and threw it back on the floor.

"Don't you want to take them?" I asked, motioning to his suit and dreading his answer.

"No."

"Will you ever wear it again?"

"No. I do not think so. I can never go back to how Gai and I were. It is…impossible with the way I treated him."

"Is that supposed to be some kind of sick joke? Lee, Gai Sensei would be ecstatic if he ever saw you don his suit again."

He took the flashlight in his hand and smiled through the poor lighting, waving off the idea.

"I came for a different thing." He answered as he helped me up. "It would be best if you waited outside, I do not want you to get hurt anymore."

I shook my head, dropping the damp bloodied cloth and wrapping my hands around his arm. "No, I'm staying here with you, I said I would didn't I?"

Lee sighed at my tenacious answer but said nothing more as he guided me through the obscure hallways.

"Where are we going?" I asked with alarm, holding on to his arm so tightly I was certain my nails had dug into his skin.

"To my room." He stated as though it were obvious.

His room was probably the sole place that had not gotten touched by the chaotic carnage of that night. The photographs he had strewn about the floor peered back at us from their undisturbed exact location on the wooden floorboards. A young Lee gazed back at us, his elated smile seemingly aimed at us. His team photo with the cheerful Tenten, scowling Neji, and grinning teacher with Lee lay waiting to be collected. Lee's fingers gently picked up one of the fallen pictures collecting dust on the floor. The beautiful young woman, his mother, looked at him with her bleak eyes and vibrant smile. It was a smile that appeared to be meant for her son's return. The man released a shaken sigh and kneeled in the middle of the sea of pictures with me.

"I wonder…" he began hesitantly, "I…I wonder what this woman would say if she were to see me now."

I smiled at his odd question and placed my hand next to the side of his face. He leaned against my touch, savoring the contact as his lips gave my palm a small kiss.

"She would be proud of you Lee. We all are." I said before letting my hand drop.

He said nothing in return for my praise and proceeded to pick up the pictures through the dim light

"These are the only things I wish to take." He whispered under his breath.

I merely nodded, although I knew the movement was rather foolish in dark room where our vision was encumbered. We slowly began to collect and reunite the fallen pieces of his album, pieces all meshed into a motley of his life, hopes, and dreams. I held my tongue while I did this, judging astutely to allow Lee all the time he needed to reminisce. His careful fingers picked and dusted off each photo, delicately placing them back inside their brown envelope. As I handed him the last picture, he uttered a swift word of gratitude before helping me rise from our place on the unkempt floor.

"Is this really all you want to take?" I asked, holding the envelope close against my chest as we walked out of the room.

"Yes…I have no desire to take anything useless."

"_Useless_?"

The words hurt, but again I kept silent over the matter like an obedient individual. The only thing more useless than his apparent dislike for the suit and headband was getting him to listen to me.

"Sakura…" his voice was squandered as he turned his head over to a long dreaded location.

"Lee…don't…" I begged as I found myself pulling at his sleeve to avoid the room.

He looked charily at the door at the end of his hall, the door whose room held the remnants of his drugged and violent struggle against his team and me.

I wanted nothing more than to leave this forsaken place.

I choked back a whimper when Lee took his first step toward the ominous door, appearing entranced by the sheer curiosity of looking inside to see his bloodbath.

"Lee…please…you won't like what you see so just stop it!" I jerked him out from his sick prying as I pulled on his hair to bring him back.

"Sakura, just let me look! I need to see what I did…what I did to my team, to YOU!" he exclaimed heatedly as he rubbed his scalp. "And stop pulling my hair! It has become a horrible habit of yours!"

"Then don't go in!" I yelled back. "You already know what you did! I don't know why you insist on making yourself feel _worse_!"

He frowned at me, his lips nearly disappearing as he pressed them together to keep from speaking. I pulled his hands in my own, looking at him pleadingly to stay away from there.

A defeated sigh, a lackadaisical nod, and dragging feet walking away from the door was Lee's answer.

"Just stop pulling my hair…" he grumbled as he waited for me by the living room door.

I could easily acquiesce to that.

But it was just too alluring to hear him sigh in frustration each time I pulled at those black strands of hair.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"Sakura, you always have your way." He continued to protest long after we had left his apartment.

I rolled my eyes and kept dabbing my nose with a tissue to prevent droplets of blood from falling.

"Are you sure you are all right?" he asked when he noticed the bleeding had not stopped. "Perhaps you should get some medical attention."

"I'm fine." I answered brusquely, slightly offended by his last comment, "it's not broken, it'd hurt a lot worse if it was."

Lee raised an eyebrow, stopping momentarily to inspect my wound. "I apologize for dragging you along, you would not have gotten hurt if you had not come."

I waved off the words of guilt, (there was no point in blaming Lee for my own stupidity.)

"I just can't wait to get home and put some ice on it." I said, already feeling an inflated bruise beginning to grow on my battered face.

I held back a hiss of pain when I tentatively touched the injury with my finger.

(The sensitive bump would be the size of a golf ball come morning.)

"Well…" Lee began, but quickly shut his mouth when a crimson streak clambered up to his face.

"…'Well'?" I repeated, apparently puzzled with his sudden reaction. "Well _what_?"

He opened his mouth again, but seemed to be playing with something invisible in his hand as he spoke.

"It will be a while before we reach your house…a-and my new apartment is not far from here." He offered shyly before clearing his throat. "It would be nice if I put some ice on you-of course you do not have to come if you do not wish to!-and we can simply wait to arrive at your house! It-it does not matter to me-in fact I believe it was stupid to even ask such-" his mouth was silenced once more as I embraced him.

"I'd LOVE to see your new apartment Lee! I'm so glad you asked!" I exclaimed, beaming at the chance.

"I hope you will like it…it is far more spacious compared to the last one." He said as he rubbed the back of his neck in a fatigued way.

(The trifling movement had been an idiosyncrasy I had found to be appealing as we spent time with each other.)

"Is it close by?" I asked excitedly.

"It is actually a few streets from here."

"Ooh, fun."

We walked what seemed a never-ending winding street that questioned my sense of direction. If Lee's hand had not held on to mine with such certainty I feared I would have gotten lost in a matter of minutes wandering around this neighborhood. We had passed several apartment complexes, each looking more similar and uniform as we continued to walk. I had begun to wonder just what kind of apartment Lee had obtained. It was obvious he had not exactly gotten the parsimonious places most ninja preferred with their income and lifestle. I stared at the prestigious architecture until we finally stopped in front of a building. It was by no means a living quarter like Naruto's or even Sasuke's…it was…_nice_ to say the least.

"I really…wanted you to see it." He said needlessly as he held the entrance door for me.

I looked at the endless flight of stairs above me to the point where my head almost fell backwards. To my utter surprise (and delight), Lee had taken out his keys and opened the first door next to us.

"I do not want you climbing all those stairs when…when you come to visit." He explained as he once again allowed me to go inside first.

I took a few reluctant steps inside the hollow apartment, noticing how even my breath held its own echo in the immense room. The fresh scent of paint and wood hanging heavily in the air noted that everything was new. Nothing had been taken inside the lonely home. No furniture adorned what I assumed would be the living room, an electric stove, a fridge, and recently made cabinets in another room were the only signs of a kitchen I saw. Nothing hung by the vacant white walls that gave suspicion of someone living there.

"Y-you're not going to move your furniture here?" I asked, my voice reverberating off the walls.

"I hope to never again see what I left behind in that place." He answered coolly before joining me in the kitchen. "The new furniture will be delivered in a few days."

He opened a cabinet and rummaged through various things, stopping shortly afterward to look inside his freezer. In a few moments I was presented with an ice bag and healing ointment.

"Please accept my apology, I do not know what I can do to make you feel better." He said genuinely.

I shrugged off the apology, but grinned playfully at his offer to "soften" my pain.

"You can show me your room."

And again…I got what I wanted.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"So anyway," I began, placing the melted ice bag by his drawer while I made myself at home by dumping my body on his new bed, "you have to tell me what you meant about Neji."

"He merely says she is a valuable teammate." He confessed awkwardly over the running water in the shower through a closed door. "Do you mind?"

"Not at all." I called back with a smile.

What had started as an amusing talk over Sai's impression had reverted to questioning Lee's earlier comment made on Neji concerning Tenten. _I_ was not the culpable one to simply be curious about a subject, if anything I thought it _Lee's_ fault for even mentioning it in the first place. The idiot thought he could escape the topic by drowning it with the light drizzle of a shower. I only yelled louder to aggravate the poor boy's mood. Pillows he had probably painstakingly placed on the headrest had been lazily pushed away by my legs and were now embellished around the bed's wrinkled navy sheets. It was cruel, I knew, but I had found pleasure in messing with things Lee had organized or cleaned. He was just too…proper and…uncluttered.

I heard the sound of a door opening and Lee's footsteps behind me as I lied on my stomach.

"As I said…he says she is a valuable comrade." He repeated, trying poorly to satisfy my nosy questioning.

"You are horrible at telling lies Lee…it doesn't suit you." I teased smugly as I turned my head over to look at him, prepared to give him another slew of burning remarks and berate him for keeping secrets from me…

…until I realized his current condition.

The man had apparently gotten out of a refreshing shower with nothing more than a white towel around his waist. The white cloth was the only fabric censoring something that made my face burn upon thinking about it.

"Lee…are you…" the question nearly dried my mouth as I continued to look at him, "are you…_naked_ underneath that?"

As if on instinct from fear of being attacked by me, he quickly tightened the towel around himself with both hands.

"Forgive me…I am quite used to dressing outside the shower regardless of visitors. I fear it has become a habit of mine." He mumbled with a brightly colored face.

'_Now __**that's**__ a habit not worth breaking.' _I thought with a smile.

I rolled my eyes and sighed. "Calm down, I'm not going to _rip_ the thing away from you. I'm just…curious to see if you are actually…not wearing anything when you come out of a shower."

"N-no." he answered shakily, hands still clutching the towel for dear life and grabbing the clothes he had left on a nearby chair.

"Can I ask you another question?" I lazily stretched on his bed before sitting up.

"What is it?"

"Why are you so unsure about yourself?"

Lee parted his lips, but could only bite them when he realized he had a dearth of answers for me.

"Unsure about myself?"

"Whenever I compliment you you always seem to brush it off like it isn't even true." I pointed out. "It's like…you don't like yourself."

He leaned his half naked body against the side of the bathroom door, looking at me as though I had said something stupid.

"What is there to like? There is nothing." He muttered bitterly.

My eyes rolled for what seemed the umpteenth time that day as I jumped off the mattress and walked closer to him.

"Of _course_ there is Lee! You're kind, strong, polite, funny, mysterious, and…and," a trickle of sweat sped past my cheek when I realized what effects his rising bare chest was having on me, "you're very…attractive."

"I am not exactly anyone's idea of an 'ideal' boyfriend." He stated bluntly, taking notice of my wandering eyes. "Please stop looking at me like that."

"But _I_ think you're handsome."

"Stop it! Just stop it Sakura!" he exclaimed as he wrapped the towel around himself to the point of practically cutting off circulation. "I am not 'handsome'! I am…_repulsive_! Why can you not see that?" was his flustered reply as he threw his unoccupied hand up in fury.

"Lee…I think you're handsome." I simply repeated and gave him a smile.

"Sakura I-"

"Take off your towel."

"I…I beg your pardon?" Lee asked, alarm rushing through his face as he fervently held on to the measly towel around his waist.

"Lee…I…please?" I pleaded, hoping he would not see any lewd intentions in my eyes.

The man looked as though he was confused, but still held the towel as though his life depended on it. I took the final step toward him, completely closing the distance between us to mere centimeters. Warm drops of water dribbled down his chest as it rose frantically, earning a smile from me. He had always seemed so unsure of himself despite his zealous professions of hard work and youth. His modesty had always been among the many things I had adulated from him. I just found it difficult to believe he held himself in such low regards when it came to his skill and body. He was a _genius_ of hard work. How he miraculously thought of his body as something _repulsive_ was beyond me.

"Lee…don't worry. I won't do anything." I promised softly.

Giving him ample time to react, I wrapped my arms around his slim waist, my face quickly dampening by the beads of water lingering in his bare chest. Being weary of any indication of refusal, I gingerly placed my right hand where his heart was. His heartbeat was erratic and alarmed, as expected from him, but his breathing seemed to be allayed as I rested my head against him.

"Sakura…can you not see that I am not for you? I am not handsome, I am not popular, I am not-"

I tried not to laugh when Lee stopped in the middle of his self disparaging as I slowly hooked one finger under the weakening knot in the towel.

I gazed up at him, my eyes gleaming with mischief...

and released it.

I quickly took a few steps away from him and studied the body before me. I was studying it in awe and curiosity, but not in the sense that any hormone driven girl would look. My face was barren of any promiscuous intent or thought. The body before me…was that of a man who had been through so many ordeals. His austere life had no doubt left him detesting everything about himself, but I wanted to change that. I wanted to shake this mentality away from him, to kiss his lips, and tell him that he was indeed worth something.

I nervously bit my lower lip at the sight.

I wanted to describe his form, but the term "beautiful" would never cross my mind. It was far too feminine for a physique as lithe and sculpted as his was. Did no woman ever realize what a GOD this young man was under all the facades and fading smiles? They were all fools for being so vain-_including_ myself. Perhaps it was _I_ who was the most blind. But his body was far more than just some object of desire…more than any meretricious attachment, it was _far_ from it.

I loved him for him.

"Lee…I think you're…"

"Ugly?"

"Gorgeous."

The man barren of clothes tried to shield his exposed skin and looked at me as though I were insane. The compliment had probably never been said to him in his _life_. It nearly made me want to kill his father for doing this to him.

"I…I think you're gorgeous Lee." I said proudly, taking his hand in my own and placing it against my face.

The soft contact was unbearably tantalizing. I needed more than just a simple caress to convince Lee his life had crucial value.

"Please don't _ever_ believe otherwise."

I enveloped his body in my arms, praying he would not rebuff my affection.

A blissful sigh came from my lips as Lee returned the tight embrace and held his warm body against my own.

"Th-thank y-you…Sakura…I…thank you." He mumbled as his back limply slid down against the wall, taking me with him lest I escaped.

His arched legs were on opposite sides of me as I hugged him, but I didn't care to look at what I had been dying to see since I liked him. Sex now seemed trivial, it seemed like something selfish, cruel, and disgusting at this point. The most important goal was to release his anxiety lest it ate at him. Plus, I instead reveled in planting small feathery kisses against his neck, accentuating my love for him. He chuckled as the contact tickled him and brought me closer to him until my whole body was pressed against his own.

"Lee…you are very important to me…" I whispered adoringly in his ear as I placed another feathery kiss on it.

The young man gifted me with a genuine smile that made me laugh in delight.

"_There's_ the Lee I love! I thought I lost you!" I exclaimed.

He shook his head and kissed me between my forehead. "You will never lose me again…I promise."

We stayed in this comforting position for what seemed a fleeting moment before I felt him stir under me.

It was then that the illusion of holding his bare body in an embrace was uprooted from my consciousness and forced me to realize what I doing. What I had originally thought would be a sweet act of trust was soon adulterated into a rather unethical situation. With an alacrity I had not intended to use, I pushed myself away from his body, my face a blend of emotions ranging from shock to embarrassment. Lee could only gawk at me in surprise, at a loss from my sudden distance between him. I tried not to allow his unrelenting gaze to put me on edge as I began to turn away from him and rise from the floor. Although I knew that what I had done had no licentious intentions, there was still a "seemingly" diminutive tint of guilt that lingered in my mind.

"I…I-I…I'm sorry." I uttered.

Lee had somewhat coyly wrapped the towel back around his waist in great haste, the effects of the occurrence clearly evident in his once pale features. Picking himself up, he could only clear his throat as he excused himself with a barely audible grumble and walked inside the bathroom to change. The act had been committed, the damage done, the humiliation of it all irreversible. Remnants of pity and lament over what I had done still plagued my conscience, eating away at me as I tried to block it out by rhythmically pounding my head into the palm of my hand.

"I'm such an idiot."

Despite my zealous compliments concerning his body, he still spurned such words and discarded them with ease. I sighed while I let my body give way to gravity and collapsed on his bed once more. As I lied sprawled in this new room, my thoughts formed a garble of what I had done. Had it been the right thing to do? Had I helped Lee or had I simple forced myself on him like the vast majority of the times? Had he been repulsed by my actions? Or had he…had he…

_liked_ it?

I coerced the last question out of my head as I felt my face burn.

Lee's mind would _never_ be in such disreputable thoughts, unlike my own.

With a contorted face, I tried to erase from my memory what I had seen.

'_Jeez, why do I feel like I just __**molested**__ him?' _

I hid my face under one of his pillows and began to think of other things to take my attention away from him.

'_Other things…other things…I have work tomorrow, maybe Lee and I can go out for lunch. Next we can go for a walk, next to drop me off, sex we can-' _

I growled and threw the pillow against the floor when I realized it would be an ordeal to get Lee's body out of my gutter-like mind.

The bathroom door creaked open, but I dared not raise my head to greet him.

"What is the matter _now_?" I heard him ask exasperatedly.

"I'm sorry!" was all I could yelp through the bed sheets.

"For _what_?"

"You _KNOW_ already!" I yelled again as I peeked up at him.

Lee's eyes widened momentarily at the spontaneous burst, unsure of what to say to me. He ran his fingers through his hair and exhaled after taking a prolonged breath.

"It is fine Sakura…I know I must tire you with my attitude toward myself but…I am…grateful to you. Truly I am." He confessed as he took a seat by the edge of the bed.

"But I…it-it isn't _that_!" I exclaimed all while trying to repress my flushing skin. "I just SAW you!"

"You see me everyday." He said innocently.

"Not like _that_ you idiot!" I yelled with a frustrated whine. "What I mean to say is that I just _SAW_ you uncovered and I want to apologize for it!"

Lee's mouth curved into an understanding circle as he rested next to me and stared at the ceiling. Even as he did this trifling movement, the loose fitting black pants he wore tormented me with glimpses of his underwear. I swallowed something stiff within my throat and tried to regain my composure.

"Ah, well…think nothing of it."

"Didn't it _bother_ you?" I asked, somewhat _wishing_ it had discomforted him even a bit.

"Well…_yes_, obviously. You have forced me to reveal certain parts of me that I would never show you, but it is not as though I was not expecting it from you."

'_Never show me?' _

"Sakura…"

"…never show me?..." the repeated words were all I could muster.

I pushed the harsh comment aside lest I wanted to fight.

"But I didn't do it for the reasons you think! I just-"

"Calm down…I understand." He mumbled while bringing his hands to the back of his head. "It is all right..."

I shifted my head over to him to see if he truly hadn't mind what I had done.

His face held a vacant expression when he turned to look at me as well.

"Thank you for…you know…coming with me to my old apartment." He reminded with a smile.

"Forget about it." I assured, "It's not like I was going to let you go alone."

"You could have, that is why I am grateful to have you."

"It's all right Lee, really it is-"

"Sakura…may I say something?" he interrupted, looking as though he had not heard any of my words.

"What is it?"

"May I please ask something else of great importance to you?"

His voice had strayed back into that kind and caring tone that I had grown to both love and loathe. I loved it since it meant he was happy, but I hated it since it usually meant I would have to say or do something I did not like.

I drew in my breath for the predictable monthly question that somehow found its way into every conversation we had.

"Sakura, will you please be my girlfriend?"

The request made my hands clench the blankets tightly.

"Lee…I-I.." I fought desperately to finish the response, but could find neither breath nor gall to speak.

"Sakura." He grasped my hand in his own and held it against his poignant face. "I…please do not give me the same answer. Please."

The contact worsened my already prolific guilt as I tore away from the imploring touch.

"…I…I'm sorry, I just can't. I can't say yes while knowing you're still in therapy." I responded quickly.

This, of course, was not overlooked by him as his eyes grew downcast.

"Sakura, why do you always answer me with that? I might _never_ recuperate! Why does my condition have to rule over how you feel? Will you _ever_ accept me?" he asked, his voice sounding neither infuriated nor disappointed.

"I just CAN'T Lee! Drop it!"

I had not meant for my remark to sound so virulent, nor was I angered by his incessant supplications. There was nothing wrong in the way he had asked me, nothing wrong with his voice, and nothing wrong with his intentions. Then why did I wish him to stop asking me such a thing? Was I _that_ frightened by obligating myself to a person like him? Despite my attempts to discover the stem of my fears I had a vague idea of what it was. There was still a lingering shred of reluctance left in our relationship. Perhaps it was the fact that he had been all too willing to kiss me, not to mention _eager_ to ask me his proposal on a monthly basis. There was something that was far too perfect in the way he had kissed me-_convenient_ even.

"Are you…" Lee closed his eyes and bit his lip, apparently averse to voicing what was on his mind, "are you…_tired_ of me?"

My eyes widened with the blow of his question.

"What? _No_! How can you even _think_ that after what we just did?!" I yelled, obviously insulted by his inquiry while lifting myself half up from his bed,.

"Then why is your answer always the same?" he asked tiredly.

"I…I don't know. Lee, why is it so hard for you to wait? You've never been impatient with me before!" I responded as I prodded into his real motives.

The man wearily rubbed his neck as he probably wondered what could possibly be going through my obdurate mind.

"Sakura…how can our relationship ever progress if you will not allow it?"

"Because…you won't let it either." I responded bluntly while making sure to avoid his face.

(I could already picture his scowling face as I said this.)

"_I_ will not let it? _Me_? Please say this is some sort of joke."

"I'm not trying to be funny." I answered, though my mouth was against his pillow as I buried my face deeper into it.

"How am _I_ deterring our relationship?" he asked with an offended tone.

"Just…the things you say…the things you _do_." I grumbled, hoping I would not blurt out that I had yet to trust him.

Voicing my problem with his behavior was increasingly difficult as I chose ways to carefully express myself.

"Explain." He stated sharply.

"Like…well…you never give me any signs that you actually _mean_ what you say." I tried to clarify the example in vain.

A shift in the bed from his weight.

An incensed sigh.

"Why does it always come back to sex of all things?" was the offhanded question.

"That's not what I _meant_ you idiot! I _never_ said anything about it!" I hissed back as I shot my head up with the insult. "Would it kill you to actually _kiss_ me once in a while? Would it honestly be difficult to verbally express your feelings to me without having a reason?"

"Explain." He answered calmly while rubbing his eyes with thumb and index finger.

"How much clearer can I make it!?" I snapped. "The only times you ever show me any signs of affection are covert! A small squeeze to my hand, a pat on my head, damn it-I feel like your younger sister or your pet when you do that!"

"So…is that all? You need more physical affection?" he asked almost condescendingly.

"Stop saying it like that! You're making me look like a desperate girl wanting attention!" I exclaimed.

"The how _would_ you like me to say it? How can I show you any affection when you yourself are reluctant to return it?" he asked in confusion. "Sometimes I do not know whether you wish to kiss me or _punch_ me!"

I held back stiff laughter from his latter comment, covering my mouth to hide my amusement.

This of course, was not ignored by Lee.

"See? You do not even take me seriously!"

"I do _too_! You just…the way you say things makes it seem like you're in an abusive relationship."

"And perhaps I am." He replied as he stole the pillow from under me. "But then that indicates that I am a masochist since I stay in it."

"Now _you're_ the one bringing sex into the conversation-"

"That is not what I-!..." he took a deep breath as he probably fought the urge to scream at me in frustration. He closed his eyes and began to rub them as though that would soothe his livid mood. "Fine….fine…fine." He muttered before lying next to me and opening his arms.

I stared at the odd pose for several moments, puzzled at what to do next.

"Well? Were you not the one who wanted affection?" he asked impatiently and he did a motion with his hands for me to come.

"Yeah, but not the awkward, planned, and stiff kind." I pointed out nervously.

"Who understands you then? You are impossible to please!" he loudly complained.

"Would it bother you to be a bit…unpredictable?" I asked before closing my eyes for a respite from the fight.

Lee merely lied on his side with a silent demeanor for a moment, appearing discomfited by my brash statement but opting to edge closer to my body until I felt his chest was against my back.

I suppressed a shriek when I felt a sharp stinging by my earlobe.

I quickly opened my eyes to see lips softly kissing my bare shoulder, stopping only long enough to give equivalent attention to my neck.

"So even _you_ are capable of kissing?" I asked teasingly, giggling slightly when he kissed my ear.

"Oh, I am capable of _much_ more than that." He whispered with a voice that nearly made all the blood in my body rush to my face.

His lips slowly kissed my earlobe and traveled to my jaw and cheek. As I gave every fiber of my being not to moan, my hand rose to caress his face, but stopped abruptly when Lee grabbed it.

"What are you…?" the question ran out of breath as he turned me over to face him, his hands swiftly removing his shirt before allowing my own to touch what lay underneath.

I laughed and managed to press my head against his shoulder as he continued his actions. I wanted nothing more than to lie here in this comfortable position for the remainder of the night, giving no attention to the world outside his apartment. There was just something so terribly appealing about sleeping next to the boy I liked while adventuring his stomach. Another smile reached my lips when I felt Lee lean into my hand. His stomach kept trying to withdraw every time I _happened_ to brush my fingers against a certain spot. Repressed chuckles informed me he was probably ticklish. I was about to grab that section ceaselessly before I felt a light touch traveling around my own stomach.

It seemed Lee's hands were as eager as mine were since I could feel them wandering on my back and ribs. He studied me, mouth slightly parted from his uneven breaths, and I was left to torment myself over what was going through his mind.

"Was this unpredictable enough?" he asked, trying to conceal his delight when I mulled over an answer.

"N-no." I said, (although my face said otherwise.)

I nearly shivered from his cool voice, my mind yelling at me to kiss him despite my wishes.

"If only you could act like this all the time." I mumbled as I pulled him closer to me if it was even physically possible.

"Well maybe in time…I will not have to _simply_ act."

I grinned devilishly as I gently undid the string around his pants, earning me a nice look at his boxer briefs. He sighed in disappointment and tied the string together again much to my dismay.

"You are so lewd Sakura…I think you are rubbing off on me." He remarked as he ran his hand up and down my arm.

"_You're_ the perverted one! I'm not the one pressing my mouth all over someone's body!" I pointed out all while motioning to his lips.

"Is that so?" he asked, and to my horror removed his hand and kisses away from me.

"Why do you tease me so much?!" I whined in disbelief.

The idiot just laughed.

"You have already seen me…why continue to steal glimpses?"

"Because it's never enough." I answered as though it were apparent.

"Never enough?"

"_Never_ enough. I want to be able to…to something besides just _look_ at you when we are older." I tried to explicate my feelings.

"You mean sex." He answered bluntly with a smirk as he tightened the knot on his string. "You truly are hard to please Sakura…then again I have always been fond of difficult tasks."

I rolled my eyes at his cocky reply.

"So what did you think of the apartment?" he asked, already tired of the last subject.

"I think it's nice." I replied, taking in the place's ideal qualities.

"Do you like it?"

"You ask me like _I'm_ the one who's going to be living in here." I joked with a giggle, hoping Lee would join me in the laughter.

He didn't.

I gulped.

"Well the apartment _is_ very accommodating..."

"Lee.." I began to warn.

"-And you would have your own room if you did not think it suitable to sleep in the same quarters."

"But Lee I-"

"It is on the first floor, you would not have to walk so far to work, the training fields are close, the market and restaurants are close and-"

"Wait…so you basically rented this place out…while thinking of me? Without even _knowing_ what my answer would be?" I asked in bewilderment.

I didn't know whether it was a sweet simple gesture or a huge sign that he was finally recuperating and maturing. He rubbed the back of his head, a tint of shame adorning his cheeks as I gave him the answer he was probably abhorring.

"Well…I was hoping…that perhaps in time…when you finally accept my offer…you would be willing to live with me?"

"…What?"

"You _have_ noticed that this is a four room apartment correct?" he asked the question with a tone that doubted my intelligence.

"Yes, but do you have ANY idea how my parents would take it?" I retorted with the same tone.

"I am not speaking about moving in tomorrow or even in a few _months_. I want us to live together when _you_ are ready and no sooner than that. Of course I will have a talk with your parents first about my intentions, but-"

"Like _hell_ you'll have a talk with them!" I exclaimed as I smacked the back of his head. "_I'll_ tell them myself…if it ever arrives to that. You'll probably just make them think we're living together to go at it!"

"No," he whispered with a slight chuckle as he ran a single index finger to my knee, allowing it to venture to my thigh with languor. "I am afraid _that_ part of our relationship will have to wait…if it ever arrives to that."

God I was grateful I _already_ had a bloody nose.

(It hid the new blood that was seeping out from Lee's actions.)

"And now…I regret to say that I must take you home…it is not proper or wise for you to sleep here." He professed as he jumped off the bed and began to pull me off as well.

"God I hate you."


	27. A Medley of Events

Hello 'alo! Again…my deepest appreciation goes to all of you for your wonderful and encouraging reviews. I would have stopped writing if it weren't for them! The new school year is already half way done and I'm cramming with quizzes, projects, tests, and finals in college. I suppose that is why I have taken so long to update. But, I must admit…this chapter is probably _the_ longest I have done (it's about 40 percent longer.) I hope it makes up for the wait and NO, I will never abandon this story, it's like a child to me! I will finish it! Well, thank you so much again! Read, Recommend, and Enjoy!

**A Medley of Events**

I gazed listlessly at the questionable meal before me, wondering what had died and crawled on my plate. My eyes stared with the same pleasure I held for a pile of paperwork given to me at seven in the morning. Yolk still oozed from the middle of an inadequately cooked egg, the toast had a stronger resemblance to charcoal rather than bread, and the verdant liquid in a glass cup appeared less attractive with each passing second. My mother stood proudly in front of the table from where I sat, her face apparently _beaming_ at her culinary skills. Scorched remnants of food stained her apron and face. Each tarnished spot was small proof that she had worked adamantly to serve the breakfast resting in front of me. I quirked an eyebrow, my curiosity whetted from her sudden liking to cooking.

The confusing woman could only smile back as she waited expectantly.

"Well Sakura?" she nearly sung her question with her cheery disposition. "Aren't you going to dig in?"

I continued to stare at the unappetizing plate with a bewildered (and still drowsy) expression. My weary body still longed for the warmth of my bed and the comfort of my sheets and pillows enveloping me and lulling me to sleep. My mother had thought it to be a lovely idea to drag her daughter out of bed on her _only_ _day_ _off_ (and in an ungodly hour to boot.)

"So how was work?" I grumbled while rubbing my eyes and holding back a yawn.

The utter shock from being stirred from my sleep would soon wear off in the afternoon.

By then I knew rage would overcome me.

"It was very promising! It was amazing how many people in the Sand village acquiesce to the plans for a desalting facility to stimulate their water supply!" she exclaimed as she placed both her hands together from the apparent joy.

(How a woman who didn't even know how to boil water knew what that meant was a wonder to me.)

"Hm…that's nice." I grumbled sleepily with no particular interest as I poked the meal with a wary fork.

My mother cocked her head to side, her smile never leaving her soft warm features.

"Hm…so…Lee came by earlier today you know." She stated rather spontaneously in an attempt to make a decent conversation with me at nine in the morning (still much too early for my taste.)

I cringed when she decided to take a seat next to me.

(It always meant we were going to "talk".)

It's not that I completely abhorred the concept of talking with my mother over my life, I just thought it horribly unnecessary for her to talk about _Lee_ every time she stayed at the house. Both she and my father had developed a certain fondness over the ninja, one that incessantly asked me about his whereabouts, but I had hastily avoided anything having to do with the topic. Lee was Lee…there was nothing else anyone needed to know about him (_especially_ my parents.) There would always be the fear of them not accepting him because of his…condition. It was a known fact most ninja did not exactly lead very "joyful" lives, but my father had often advised me to pick the most _sane_ and well-rounded one if I were to ever consider dating or marrying one.

(Guess that kicked Naruto and Sasuke out of the possible candidates.)

"What the…? What was he doing at our house so early?" I asked, pushing the horrid plate of food to the farthest side of the table and getting up from my seat.

"Well…he didn't come here _especially_ per say." She responded with a shameless grin that somewhat reminded me of a certain hyperactive ninja.

"So you two ran into each other?" I questioned as I scavenged the cabinets and fridge for something safe to consume.

"You could say that." Was the sheepish reply. "I had just arrived from my trip and well, you know how I just _love_ to take souvenirs."

"What happened?" my voice already quivered with the endless possible methods she used to humiliate me.

"Well, my suitcase was much too heavy for me to carry by myself. I pulled and jerked and tugged and I just couldn't do it! Then…just as I was wondering who could help little ol' me, I spotted Lee speaking with a boy from the Hyuga clan on a nearby bench. Can you _imagine_ my luck?!" she said as though it had been a divine intervention to her troubles.

I stopped munching on my sugar infested cereal long enough to see my mother's widened eyes and perfectly circled mouth encouraging me to have the same expression on my face.

"What were they doing?" I asked as I poured another splash of milk into my bowl and ignored her.

"Well, at first it looked like they were having a heated 'discussion', but I was proved wrong when Lee laughed and the boy chuckled over something I couldn't hear."

I felt my eyes roll from their predictable and childish bickering.

"Idiots." I mumbled under my breath.

"Anyway, I digress. Lee nearly jumped at the chance to help me with the suitcase as soon as he saw me and _insisted_ to accompany me home. I was so happy when he took my offer to come inside and say good morning to you!" she scrunched her nose after she gave her sentence some thought. "Well…that is…until I found you still sprawled on your bed and your blankets looking like you had wrestled a bear in them."

I brushed her taunts aside and stuffed a spoonful of the cereal into my mouth to keep from spewing a crude remark.

"And as it turned out, my stomach informed me that I was hungry just as Lee was about to leave." She said with a slightly embarrassed face. "Upon learning that I would wait for your father since I could not cook to save my life, Lee took it upon himself to make us some breakfast! He's such a wonderful well mannered boy Sakura! Not to mention he's a great cook and knows how to fix nearly _everything_!"

I groaned from her unusually thunderous voice pulsing through my sensitive ears and tried to drown it out by the crunching of my breakfast.

"Well, of course he's a good cook, how'd you think-…" my ascending and descending jaw slowly grew to a halt when a horrible realization sunk within me. "Oh god… NO…_mom_ please tell me you didn't make him do chores around the house!" I nearly screamed, my face burning at the thought of him fixing our drains and changing light bulbs that were too high for her reach.

My mother almost grew dignified and insulted from my brash question.

"I didn't _ask_ him anything! He kept doing the things even though I told him not to!" she defended herself as she crossed her arms. "And anyway, I _enjoy_ his company. Every time I'm home you're either sleeping or working so I'm always alone! Even _when_ you're here you never _talk_! I always have to practically interrogate you just to know how your day was!" she pointed out with a pout.

I bit the inside of my cheek to keep from fighting or lashing out with a slur of complaints. (When it came to arguing with mothers, the only one who would end up losing was the child.)

"So what else did he say?" I asked with a forced friendly voice.

"Many things." She answered with an almost aggrieved face as she tapped the rim of her coffee cup uneasily.

She released a shaky sigh as she continued to look at me and shook her head condescendingly as though I had done some wrong.

I quirked an eyebrow and served myself more cereal to keep her stare away from my conscience.

I hated that look in her eyes.

It was the look she often gave me before I was grounded.

"Sakura…"

'_And it __**starts**__.' _

"Why…why didn't you tell me he was receiving therapy sessions?" she asked cautiously as she rubbed her forehead as if to ease her distraught state.

A surprised grunt slipped past my lips as I nearly choked on the food from her unexpected question.

"…I-"

"Why didn't you tell your own _parents_ that he was suffering from severe depression?!" she interrupted with a piercing voice that was alien to my ears.

The sound was enough to make me jump away from my seat and stand several feet away from her. Even when I disobeyed her, even when I snuck out of the house…even when I had disrespected her, this woman had failed to _ever_ muster enough fury to scold me as she had now. It made every nerve in my body shiver, my blood frozen from her unrelenting gaze. Her typical docile nature had soon turned scornful…counterpart eyes staring me down, attempting to unveil anything else I had failed to inform her. I was forced to endure the woman's fixed glare, my mind reeling at the possible actions she could take.

"Y-you couldn't understand mom." I stuttered, gulping as her eyes widened.

Her pursed lips to the point where I was certain her teeth were gnawing at the flesh.

"_I_ wouldn't understand? Sakura, that poor boy has been though so much! You could have at least _told_ us! We were probably just making him feel worse with all the questions!" she burst from my juvenile answer.

"_You_ don't need to know! _No one_ needs to know! And I certainly don't want to treat him any differently after what happened. The _last_ thing he needs is pity."

"I'm not talking about _sympathy_! I'm talking about _trust_! Are you even _serious_ about this boy?" she asked incredulously with narrowed eyes.

"Serious? Why would you even say that? Of course I'm-"

"Then why keep him a complete mystery to us?"

"I was afraid-"

"Did you think we would look at him _differently_ if we found out about his condition? Is that it?" she accused venomously.

"Would you just let me-"

"Do you not _trust_ him!?" she egged me on with no reprieve.

"YES! YES I _DO_!" I screamed, slamming both hands flat on the table, its legs quaking and threatening to break under my strength.

"Then why do you act like you _don't_?" she asked, her eyes showing no hint of compassion for me. "Sakura…if you don't…if you don't truly care for him then at least have enough _maturity_ to tell him so."

My eyes widened from her callous advice, my mouth clenching to keep from retorting something.

"I DO care for him!" I exclaimed, unaware of whom I was trying to reassure.

"Then say something to him! Give him some sort of confirmation about where he stands with you!"

I quirked an eyebrow from her sudden knowledge between us.

"Just _what_ did he tell you?" I asked, wondering how far my mother had pried into my relationship with Lee.

My mother gifted me with knitted brows and an insulted face. "He didn't NEED to tell me anything! I can see how much he's hurting without him saying a word!" Her frantic eyes finally softened, revealing the kindhearted maternal instincts of a woman who simply wanted to make me realize something crucial. "I won't snoop any further but…don't you trust him?"

"Trust him?"

"From what I can tell…it's been months now Sakura…stop toying with him."

"I-I'm not…" I stammered out, feeling a sigh escape my body. The bitter sensation of defeat was slowly marking its territory across my conscience as my mother continued to stare me down. Her condescending eyes reminded me of Lee's, always watching, always there, always aware of my slightest moves.

Always wanting me to break.

"Fine…fine….I'll go talk to him today." I muttered, fully aware of the consequences if my answer was anything _but_ complete compliance. "I got to stop by the library to pick up some books anyway."

"That's my girl."

"Do you know where he went off to?" I asked tiredly, scooping up the last of the cereal into my mouth and chewing its soggy remains with disgust.

Even the cereal had grown bitter to my palate.

"_Well_…" my mother began pensively, "he did say something about helping the academy teacher with papers."

"Iruka Sensei?" I asked, albeit puzzled.

"I think so." She answered with a yawn. "I think I'm going to call it a day. I've been up since two mornings ago."

I shuddered at the woman's endurance to be able to withstand such a lack of sleep.

Work apparently held a higher importance than her own well being.

"Sure." I grumbled. "Are you going to be here when I come back?"

"It's likely…unless something comes up," was her ambiguous response as she nearly dragged her feet up the stairs.

"Ah."

I quickly left my dirty dishes by the sink and sullenly made my way to the door where my shoes waited for me.

'_So that means no.' _

Work was _always_ top priority.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I could have sworn to have looked for Lee all over the village as I aimlessly kicked at pebbles against the cool pavement in the marketplace. Portly clouds were concealing the sun, making me unnerved from the possibility of rain. It had been several hours after my visit from the library and I had to conclude Lee must have been doing everything he wanted to do before he _died_. Iruka Sensei had not been much assistance by the time I had reached him. With a shrug of his shoulder and a clueless face he told me he had last seen him trimming bonsai trees with Ino (which for some reason did not sit well with me.) Without so much as a word of gratitude I raced to the Yamanaka flower shop only to find Ino sweeping the remnants of snipped flowers and leaves.

The idiot must have loved making me waste my time looking for him.

I ran to the closest barbecue restaurant when informed he had gone to lunch with Choji….only to have sprinted to the training fields when he went off to train with Hinata (which as horrible as it felt, _also_ did not sit well with me). The timid Hyuga's pale eyes widened in question to my disheveled state and sweaty face once I found her, but she sent me on a yet a _different_ route once she said they had run into Shikamaru, who only encouraged Lee to go off with _him_. My veins pulsed when Hinata told me both the slacker and him had purchased some beer and were last seen on a meadow watching the clouds. I growled in frustration when I realized I was getting no where in finding that fool of mine.

I took my time as I walked to the clearing in the village's robust forest. There was no point in hastening to a place Lee would no longer be at this point. Leaves wildly thrashing about with the wind hushed my calling to both men to a mere whisper. It would rain soon, just as I was about to begin my search for Lee anew. The once arid temperature wafting about had turned into a frenzied damp gust that threatened to lift my shirt with each step I took. A treeless meadow finally met my view and I managed to jog towards it with clothes intact. My shoes noisily squeaked with the collected dew on the grass as I walked toward two familiar figure lolling on the grass.

"Hey you two!" I yelled.

Empty cans of beer softly clanked together in the breeze as the friends slept soundly by the grass. It seemed the two were completely unaware of my call or the wind slapping at their faces.

"HEY!" I snapped again, obviously annoyed at the mens' total disregard to me.

By this time both Naruto and Shikamaru had stirred from their nap, taking the time to leisurely scratch and rub their stomachs or neck.

"You two look like hobos sleeping in the park with all the empty booze cans around you!" I scolded, kicking said cans surrounding me.

"Lay off Sakura, it's too early for your nagging." Shikamaru groaned as he sat upright from his makeshift grass bed.

"EARLY!? It's freaking _noon_! What it _IS_ early for is drinking _this_ crap!" I nearly screeched as I motioned to all the littered cans around the meadow. "What the hell are you _thinking_ getting trashed at this time!?"

I could tell my unusually high voice was already aggravating the headache from their now sensitive ears.

"Hey…Sakura…what's up?" Naruto seemed to somewhat slur as he tried to get up from his spot, but slammed back down with a lopsided grin. "Shikamaru….I can't hold on to the grass, is that normal?"

"Yeah, it wears off after a while."

"Where's Lee?" I asked, wasting no time in greeting the drunkards and their antics.

"He was here a while ago before Naruto…bought the beer too…man that guy is awesome…" Shikamaru, being a year younger than Lee, praised the man for his ability to purchase alcoholic beverages, yet gave no information as to where he currently was now.

"I KNOW he got the beer, no IDIOT would ever let you be in possession of this crap just by _looking_ at you!" I exclaimed wondering how someone so _smart_ could say something so…_stupid_. "Now tell me where he went!"

"Sakura, can I t-talk…to you for a s-sec?"

"Shut up Naruto, I'm looking for Lee."

"I-it's kinda umper..tant…"

"I'm sure it can wait Naruto." I replied dryly as I waved him off like a bothersome fly.

A very drunk, incoherent, annoying fly.

"Yeah but Saku-"

"Just go to my house later on tonight and tell me there!" I cut him off, oblivious with what facial expression he held at my retort.

"…Yeah…okay."

Just when I thought the idiot was within my grasp, he had apparently decided to escape once again.

Ah well…

As long as he wasn't wasted like those two I was sure I could forgive him.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The taciturn library provided some comfort after I had decided to take shelter from the raging winds. Not being surrounded by complete idiots had somewhat calmed my nerves as I scanned the vast rows of textbooks and scrolls available to me. It was not to say that a gluttonous man, a stuttering woman, and two inebriated jerks were completely useless (among other people) when it came to obtaining information, but I could only stay with them for so long until I cracked.

At least the library provided similar astute minds for interaction.

Just as I was idly flipping through the pages of a nearly primordial book, I noticed something was amiss.

Someone whom I had gotten used to seeing on a daily basis utilizing the library's resources was not in my sight. Instinctively, my head began to turn sideways in search of him.

It wasn't long before a black mass of clothes and hair caught my eye amongst the vastly empty tables.

There, sitting quite languidly by the farthest table in the room with book in hand, was Sai staring uninterestedly at it. His fingers lightly tapped the table occasionally as he turned the page slowly, almost as though he had not cared to read it. What I thought resembled remnants of faded green paint stained the right side of his mandible, looking as if it had been scrubbed away with a towel prior to coming here. Tiny specks were barely visible on his black pants as well. I shrugged his appearance away since I was not necessarily curious to know what piece of art he had been working on. His unusually relaxed pose and glazed eyes made me wonder if _any_ of his attention was directed at the printed words.

Being cautious not to disturb the building's scarce patrons, I quietly made my way to the odd behaving boy.

"Hey you." I whispered courteously.

No response.

Merely a flip of the pages from the deserted book.

"Hey!" I repeated in a more hissing manner.

Again, Sai seemed to be engrossed in his own world of thought as his stationary eyes even stopped the process of blinking.

What was going across that head of his I did not even wish to know as I lost patience and slammed my stack of books flat on the table, apparently startling him from his seat.

"I-!...Sakura?" he uttered, widened onyx eyes finally acknowledging me.

"Took you long enough." I huffed, taking a seat in the chair next to him.

"…Sorry…" was all he mumbled before returning to his book.

"What are you reading?" I asked, somewhat miffed from his sudden lack of interest in me.

"Hm…"

"I just ASKED you what you were reading." I demanded as I was left admonished by his rude comportment.

Not that Sai was one for manners anyway, but even his indirect insults had failed to surface in the few words he had spoken.

Something was eerily off with this guy.

He merely gave me a short glance before handing me the book.

"I don't WANT the book!" I said, trying fervently not to raise my voice. "What I mean was what you're _thinking_ about!"

"Thinking about?" he repeated the inquiry while setting the book down. "Nothing I suppose."

"Then why are you spacing out?" I pointed out accusingly.

Sai was not making this conversation a pleasing one.

His index finger nervously rubbed at his cheek and his eyes wandered to the floor for a moment, two motions that had grown to be common each time he wanted to ask something but was reluctant on how to word it.

"What is it?"

"Nothing."

"Hm, that usually means something." I teased as I pulled the book away to grab his attention.

Sai eyed me for a moment, his slightly parted lips being an obvious sign that he wanted to ask me something of great uncertainty.

"Sakura…."

"Hm?" I asked, unconsciously turning a random page and seeing nothing in particular.

"Sakura…I…I have been wondering lately…the bond you share with Lee…is it…_different_?"

"What?" The unexpected question caught me off guard as I tripped over several logical answers in my mind.

"Is it the same bond Naruto has with Sasuke?" his calm voice was genuinely intrigued by this _odd_ choice of topic.

"Sai…do you…mind not saying that again?" I begged, feeling slightly disturbed from his suddenly interested eyes and smile as he said this.

"The contact you made with Lee that night. What was it?"

"_Contact_?" I muttered as I tried to keep my face from boiling.

"Nevermind, I think I know already. It is osculation between two people, correct?" He said in comprehension while tapping an index finger against his chin. "I read in a book that it is usually done to portray extreme fondness or intimacy between people."

"And right you are." Was my uneasy response as I close the book. "Is that all? Where did this whole curiosity about kissing come from? Why do you even want to kn-"

"When can you start doing that to someone?"

"I!...I-y-you just can't START!" I snapped, automatically receiving dirty looks and hushing noises from our neighbors. Rubbing my temples in agitation, I tried to reword my outburst. "Sai…first off, you need to know this person well enough….ah well, not necessarily, since some people do it without really knowing each other-but that's not the _point_! What I'm trying to tell you is that you just can't KISS someone unless you feel _strongly_ for them!"

"Well…I '_strongly'_ feel that Naruto is my friend, so ca-"

"NO! GOD NO!" I screamed back in alarm and quite possibly to stop from mental scarring.

Again, I ignored the horrendous glares coming from people around us.

I allowed my head to hang down in frustration as I wondered how so many men in our village could be so cunning in missions yet so stupid in life.

"You just can't _kiss_ them because they're your friend…you have…you _need_ to have 'romantic' feelings toward them. You have to care for them as _more_ than a friend." I tried to explain at the expense of my sanity.

"Is that what you feel towards Lee?"

"Yes…I- mean, I guess." I grumbled, discomfited once the subject shifted back to my relationship.

"What does it feel like?"

I fought back a blush, rubbing the back of my head in annoyance and not expecting this onslaught of questions into my personal life.

"Well…I…wonderful…I guess. But sometimes…it's really painful. It makes you feel like wanting to spend time with the person…feel like going out of your way for them." I elucidated tiredly.

Sai nodded silently as he rested his head on the palm of his hand, looking at me with complete interest now that I had given him something he could use.

His blank stare made me wonder if he was done with this subject.

"Sakura?"

"What?"

"Does Naruto love Sas-"

"OH GOD…ju-just STOP. Okay? Jus-just _STOP_." I pleaded as I held a hand across his mouth.

"It's different between them, Sai." I clearly explained the relationship while releasing his lips. "They're '_best'_ friends, you know, like Shikamaru and Choji, Neji and Lee or….um-"

"You and Tenten?"

"_Now_ you understand!" I exclaimed excitedly, feeling like the scientist teaching a robot about emotions.

"A bit." He admitted softly before rising from his seat.

"What brought this up though?"

"I was talking to Lee about it."

"_Lee_!?" I immediately shot up from my seat as well at the mere mention of his name. "You were _with_ him!?"

Sai, although surprised by my rash movement, seemed unfazed by my urgency. "For a while…he asked me if I could teach him how to paint today."

"Do you know where he went!?"

At this point I had completely stopped caring about my 'library' voice.

"Well, after we finished, he asked if I wanted to go to the hot springs with him."

"So he went alone?"

He shook his head, locks of black hair swaying with the movement. "I believe he said Gai and Kakashi Sensei would be there too."

I scrambled away from the table, thrilled that I had gotten hold of his most recent location.

"Sai, I have to go! I'll talk to you later okay?" I muttered no excuse as I gathered my books into my arms and prepared for a dash.

"Sakura?"

"What, what, WHAT?" I asked, feeling as if every second wasted was tearing me farther apart from Lee.

"Thank you…you were the one who introduced me to them." He blurted, baffling me over his suddenly strong rapport with Gai's team.

I awkwardly pulled my rash movements to a pause and stared at the pale boy in front of me with incredulity.

"Y-you're…welcome, but you really shouldn't thank me for something like that…it's nice that you've found new friends." I said with a warm smile.

Sai seemed to return the expression and returned to his seat. "You know something? I think I have found his and Tenten's bond to be the most enjoyable out of all the ones I've made."

"I-well…I-I'm glad." I answered awkwardly, not quite knowing how to deal with such an honest statement in the midst of my frenzied thoughts.

"I followed Tenten's advice and got to know Lee. We have a lot in common." He stated with what I thought was a rare cheerful tone.

"Like what?" I asked, puzzled as to what similarities or traits the two men could _possibly_ share.

He cocked his head to the side in amazement as he read something humorous in his book.

I waited impatiently, already taking a few steps back towards the door.

"Wha-"

The man smiled at me once more and set the book down.

"His smiles were fake ones once too you know."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It had taken me about fifteen minutes to travel by foot to the village hot springs. By then the weather had taken a turn for the worse. Clouds saturated with rain hung ominously over my head, their stray drops of water hitting me every couple of blocks I walked. I would have to hurry if I wished to make it to my house in any suitably dry state. The tempting thought of allowing my clothes to dry at Lee's apartment once I found him crossed my mind, yet I shoved it aside knowing my indecent intentions. Taking off any piece of clothing would no doubt lead to something I would probably regret the following _hour_.

I was relieved once I saw the familiar warm steam drifting towards the sky. The hot springs were close by, and with them, hopefully Lee.

The springs' wooden fences had barely come into view, along with them the various conversations of the people hidden in privacy. I had taken no less than two steps before yet _another_ recognizable figure caught my eye.

It was a woman of rather tall stature, albeit hunched over and peering into one of the wooden walls.

"…Tenten?" I asked hesitantly out of fear of addressing the wrong person.

Sure enough, the woman frenetically turned her head over to me, eyes filled with an alarming sense of doom that I could not decipher. Her legs began to quake under my gaze, lips reluctant to open and return the greeting. She appeared to be wearing nothing more than a plain white shirt that was one size too large and black pants, something I thought rather _weird _for someone who always wore traditional clothes. I spotted discolored green blots that littered her neck and arms, but I decided give her situation, rather than her appearance, top priority.

"What are you up to?" I questioned her bizarre stance and suspicious nervous twitching.

"N-no-NOTHING! Why? Does it look like I should be doing something?" she uttered with an amusingly high pitch.

Weird…that tone of voice was eerily familiar.

'_It's the one Naruto uses whenever he's done something wrong and tries to hide it.._'

I nodded my head rather calmly at the fresh memory.

It was only after I contemplated _where _we were that I began to give her a warning look.

'_Tenten would never…__**no**__, she wouldn't.' _

"So…you're here because you're going in…right?" I asked, wondering why Tenten was trying to hide something behind her that I could have sworn resembled a small hole.

"N-YES!"

"Then what are you doing crouching over-" before my suspicions could be further aroused, two well-known Senseis exited the men's side of the spring. Gai….and Kakashi.

"Oh, look! They're who I'm looking-!" before I could finish my gleeful words I stopped to look back at Tenten who was currently trying to hide the hole that was now _pitifully_ apparent behind her.

Gai and Kakashi…..

Gai…and…Kakashi…

Oh…..oh, sick realization.

The shocked and traumatized look I gave her was enough to make her once seemingly innocent stance falter under my mixed visage.

"Oh god…Tenten, don't tell me Konoha has given birth to yet another famous peeping tom…" I groaned in agitation at her actions.

"I WASN'T-"

"Were you checking THEM out!? I swear you're worse than the _BOYS_!" I yelled, cracking my knuckles as I prepared to punch a pervert that (for once) was not a boy. .

"Not _them_ exactly…" she mumbled as she fumbled with both her index fingers. "O-or a-at least not _both_ of them…"

I was about to scream (or at the very least smack her upside the head), before my hand fell flaccidly to my side from doubled shock when I realized just _who_ she had implied.

"Stop stalking my _TEACHER_!" I barked as my mind nearly became blinded with the thought of someone actually _wanting_ to see Kakashi bathing.

"I'm NOT! I was just walk-"

"NEVERMIND! HAVE YOU SEEN LEE?"

She obediently shook her head lest I demolished her.

At this point I figured all I could do was allow Tenten to go about her business rather than waste my time trying to teach her why following jounin around was a _horrible_ idea.

I just knew I would never be able to look at her the same way again.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It wasn't long before the search grew exasperating that I was forced to return home and leave the mountain of books I had checked out on the way. Drenched with my own sweat and freezing rain that had fallen prior to my arrival, I ran up my room for a quick hot shower. I peeled off my clothes with disgust, scowling at the damp sensation it gave my bare skin even after I had discarded them.

"Sakura!? Is that you?" My mother's drowsy hollering could be heard downstairs.

"YES!" I yelled back, releasing a relaxed sigh as I dried myself with a towel and kicked my soaked clothes into the hamper.

"Well, come down, you have a visitor!"

I growled in irritation at the thought of Naruto not being able to wait until an opportune time to stop by my house. Pulling on my usual shirt dress attire, I trudged down the stairs with an unpleasant look on my face, ready to glare at the blonde for interrupting my rare moments of rest. It was not until I heard my mother's rather loud voice asking something that I decided to hasten my speed downstairs.

"Oh my-, take off those clothes at _once_!"

"…No thank you."

"Now I'm serious, don't be shy!" my mother's persuading voice echoed through the hallways.

"No…thank you."

I'd recognized that apathetic tone anywhere.

"Sasuke?" I asked, hoping against all odds that that woman was not conversing with such an antisocial individual.

As my wonderful luck would have it, the Uchiha was currently trying to keep his distance from my mother with a tint of alarm in his features. His robes were drenched, droplets of water formed small puddles around his feet. Hair usually rebellious to gravity had collapsed under the added weight and hung over his forehead and eyes, giving him a brooding look more extreme than his customary one.

"Sakura." His voice held no alarm toward the situation, but his eyes did not even travel to meet me lest he risked taking his attention off my mother.

Ah yes, he was a cautious one indeed.

The woman held a towel in her arms, her maternal instincts bent on taking Sasuke's wet clothes off by force if necessary.

"Take the top of your robe off at least for goodness' sakes! I will give you a warm dry shirt and an umbrella to take back home." She pleaded, her voice on the verge of scolding.

"No thank you." He responded again mechanically, his voice becoming more detached with each word he wasted breath to say.

"_Heavens_ no! What will your _mother_ say to me when she finds out I allowed her son to go back home soaking wet?" she inquired as she stubbornly crossed her arms.

Sasuke blinked.

I was left to wonder what emotions, if any, had gone through his barely stable mind.

The aloof man gifted her with his infamous deadpan stare, one that neither confirmed nor denied any feelings toward her awkward comment. An unnerving silence and the interrupting sound of my clearing throat was the only reply my mother received. Her oblivious (or foolish) nature did not allow her the sense to realize just _who_ she was talking to or the severity of her casual remark. I nervously bit my lower lip and prayed he would just ignore her caring grin and outstretched arms offering the towel. The intolerably sweet woman took a step toward my teammate and impatiently waited for his answer.

"Please? A bad cold will stop even the _strongest_ of ninja from training, you don't want to stop training with your team do you?" she asked with another smile.

It seemed this reasoning had run true in Sasuke's logical and analytical mind as I saw his usually clenched fists grow lax. One of his arms slowly rose to touch the towel, hesitantly allowing his fingers to graze the soft cotton fabric before taking it off my mother's hands.

When it came to strength, Sasuke took all advice to get it.

"There! My, you're a shy one." She teased, unknowingly treading farther into her down death as he narrowed his eyes at her in annoyance.

"Um, mom-" I stammered.

"Sasuke, would you like a cup of hot tea? Coffee? Milk?" my mother's never-ending hospitality began to discomfit Sasuke as his head turned over to me and back at the towel in slight puzzlement.

I could only shrug and play along with whatever goal my mom was trying to achieve by getting on the Uchiha's nerves.

"No thank you." He repeated, his eyes looking past the towel and locking into my own. "Excuse me, I need to go-"

"Nonsense! Sakura will make you some tea! It's no trouble at all!" the woman exclaimed as she did something that would have gotten anyone killed or maimed. She decided it was a charming idea to do the horrifying mistake of taking hold of Sasuke's arm, catching the man off guard, and pulling him into the kitchen.

"You're even shyer than the last boy!...Speaking of whom…would you like some ramen? Although I think that poor boy must've been _starving_ since he ate almost all of Sakura's supply in the cabinet when he stopped by." Her random and scattered thoughts were accumulated into makeshift words that both baffled and peeved him to no end.

"The…last boy?" I asked, wondering just how many boys she had clothed and fed while I was gone.

"Really nice golden hair, soaking wet just like Sasuke here." My mother recalled, slapping on another towel over the man's now slicked back hair to dry the beads of water dripping from it.

I turned my head away to avoid the murderous intent concealed in Sasuke's glares toward me.

He shook his hair in rejection of her comfort. "No thank you. Sakura, can I talk to you?"

I rubbed the back of my head in confusion, but followed my teammate out my house.

"Thank you for the towel." He mentioned before handing said towel back into my mother's arms.

"Any time Sasuke, it's always nice to meet Sakura's little friends." She chirped.

I was just grateful he had decided to spare her after the 'little' comment.

"I'm really sorry about her…she's into meeting my friends all of a sudden." I whispered as I locked the door behind me.

"That's irrelevant," he brushed off the woman's antics as though he had already forgotten her. "Where's Naruto?"

"I don't know. I thought he'd be training with you by now." I replied, taking a seat by the edge of the steps leading to my door. I looked up at the rain, thankful that the furious skies had finally begun to clear.

"You mean he hasn't seen you yet?" he asked as though the matter had irritated him as he crouched down on the step on top of mine.

"Well, yes I DID see him, but I told him to talk to me later." I answered, eager to leave and continue my quest to look for Lee. "Why? It wasn't something important was it?"

"He told me he was-…" Sasuke slowly closed his mouth before he could say anymore, sighing for a moment before letting his shoulders ascend and descend in an upset fashion.

"What? What was he going to do?" I asked, uncomfortably shifting my weight between the balls of my feet.

"Nothing. Discard what I just said." He stated as he stood up from the steps.

"No, wait, tell me! Now I want to know!" I gave him a scowl when the diffident man was not about to talk.

"Sakura?"

"What is it?"

"If you bump into Naruto, tell him he's an idiot for me," was his odd request.

"Will do." I replied dryly, giving up my futile efforts to get anything out of him.

"Also…I last saw Lee with Shino in the west training field." He commented tonelessly.

"Shino?" I asked, puzzled over the odd company he had started to keep. "What were they doing?"

"Who knows? It seemed to me like they were collecting insects."

"Sounds interesting." I said flatly, mimicking Sasuke's actions as I rose from my step and walked him to the streets. "But how did you know I was looking for him?"

He shrugged and jumped across the roof of various houses with ease, leaving me to answer that question by myself.

'_Socially retarded jerk.' _

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

Finding Naruto would have to be the last priority on my list, for now I knew I had to talk to Lee and straighten everything out lest I encountered my mother's wrath. I was only thankful he had given me the spare key to his apartment in case I ever felt lonely or I wanted to wait for him while he wasn't home. Unless staying over at people's houses was on his schedule, he would have to return home to rest at some point.

'_That man thinks of everything.' _

I fingered around my pocket until I found what I wanted. The key's polished steel was cool against my warm hand and felt alien to my skin after Lee had given it to me on one of my visits. I smiled when I thought about his considerate and often selfless attitude toward me whenever it came to making me feel welcomed in his apartment. It might have been simply to encourage me to visit him more often, but the fact that he was willing to give me a copy was sufficient to give me a feeling of belonging in his life.

I unlocked the door and gently pushed it open, shivering slightly when I entered the air conditioned living room. Squandering no time in searching for the light switch, I took off my shoes and tip toed quickly into Lee's room. A grin widened my face when I saw my target. He had the form of a rather large lump wrapped in blankets resting on the bed.

"Hey…Lee." I whispered but received no answer on his part.

The man was in a deep sleep that would not be broken so easily by my paltry soft interruptions.

Being careful not to stir him from his rest, I crept unto the bed and sat beside him. I held back a giggle when I caressed his cheek and he grumbled something incoherent in protest to the contact. This merely promoted my meddling with his body as my hand slowly began to creep downward from his jaw, resting momentarily on his collarbone before traveling further down his chest hidden in the bed sheets. I debated against kissing him once a smile stretched across his parted lips when I reached his rigid stomach. My accelerated heartbeat only deteriorated my once calm disposition.

'_So close.' _

I debated on whether or not to proceed since the idiot still had not woken up. He was far too knocked out to even care realized what was happening around him, let alone what I was _doing_ to him (albeit his smiles and content groans only encouraged me more.) I allowed my hand to venture further down his stomach, stopping only when I felt his bottom abdomen lean against my touch. I could no longer swallow from the exhilaration and I fought to keep control. I continued to drift down wondering mischievously over when my fingers would be stopped by the elastic waistband of his boxer briefs.

Funny.

The waistband never came.

It was only after I felt….'something'…that I watched Lee's entire body jump at least a _foot_ above the bed. His eyes frantically fluttered open as he instinctively gathered as much of his bed sheets around his waist as he could. A shaken sound resembling a scream and gasp came from his mouth as he regained his voice.

"Sa-SAKURA!?" Lee yelled, his dazed eyes still not used to the rude awakening I had given him.

"…Hi!..." I cheerily said in return, raising one hand at him as a greeting.

I tried desperately to hold back the laughter threatening to erupt from within me as I saw him in this disheveled and destabilized state.

"Wh-what are you doing here!?" he asked with a panicked look on his crimson face.

"I…I just wanted to visit you, that's all." I answered through chocked giggles. "I didn't know you slept in the n-"

"Do NOT say it Sakura! I-!" Lee failed to finish his sentence when he realized I was still holding back a new fit of laughter.

"Sorry! Sorry!" I hacked.

"I-I just! STOP LAUGHING!" he practically ordered. "I just sleep more comfortably without anything on sometimes!"

The excuses were pitiful in my ears as I finally gave in and exploded with uncontrollable mirth.

"It is not FUNNY! You frightened the living hell out of me!" he exclaimed while burying himself even deeper in the blankets.

This, of course, only caused me to laugh harder. Despite the fact of having emotionally scarred him far beyond his usual traumas, my laughter conveyed no signs of lament. I clutched my sides, feeling my obliques swell with pain from my actions. Lee only burrowed himself deeper in the sheets, appearing more like a cocoon than a human.

"Why did I give her a key?" I heard him grumble.

"Because you want me to feel welcomed whenever I come by!" I answered his furtive question as I halted my giggles long enough to pounce on top of his covered body.

Lee's airless cries greeted me as my whole body landed on his back.

"Sakura…get _off_."

"No." I replied playfully, lowering my lips to his ears. "You've been running away from me all day Lee. And you know what else? I think I _enjoy_ being on top of you."

It was not long before Lee understood the concealed sexual innuendo and began to wildly free himself away from the blankets with a furious blush on his face. I dumped my body on the opposite side of the side of the bed as I watched his frantic movements with interest.

"You know…I wouldn't mind living with you if you slept like that all the time." I joked, eyeing his hands as they made a mad dash to grab his boxers by the floor.

"No…just…just stop it Sakura, I am in no mood." He said briskly

I smiled and muttered a word of apology as I leaned my head against his bare back.

"So I've heard you've been quite the altruistic man today." I whispered into his ear before kissing his cheek.

Despite his sour mood, I felt Lee smile tiredly at my affection and clasped my wandering hand currently heading anew toward his lower abdomen.

"I've missed you." I seemed to want to add.

"The psychiatrist advised me to obtain some new hobbies and get to know people…he said it would help…" he explained.

"And did it?"

He shrugged, stretching both his weary arms up to the sky to rid himself of the tense muscles.

"I suppose it did a bit, but…I think I enjoyed being with Shikamaru or Hinata the most though."

"Oh really? And why's that?"

"Talking was not even necessary with them…they are very quiet individuals."

"And what about the rest of the group?"

"Well contrary to popular belief, Shino can _actually_ be quite the talker if one takes the time to go insect collecting with him, I think I have enough dirt to ruin _anyone's_ reputation in the village courtesy of Ino, Sai turned out to be a _very_ creative individual, and I discovered that being "full" is merely a state of mind with Choji. Iruka Sensei can be enjoyable company considering I found it pleasant to play with the younger academy students. As with Kiba…my is _he_ interesting." He stated everything he had learned as though he were reading off a list while he continued to stretch lazily.

"Why? I heard you helped him give baths to all their dogs." I recalled from Ino.

"Yes and I am afraid it will also be the last time I ever try to lather a dog that can bite my hand off if angered."

"What else can you expect from a ninja hound?" I teased as I trailed my finger across the middle of his back.

"It was a vain attempt to clean though…it rained anyway and we spent more time trying to gather the dogs. Then our clothes became wet and we had to take them off unfortunately." He explained with a bored tone as though it was a daily thing.

I cleared my throat to interrupt any indecent thoughts forming in my mind. Trying to stop my burning face from becoming obvious to Lee was something I was trying ardently to do. It wasn't a facile thing to stare at him and _not_ imagine the two men half naked…drenched in soap and water…soaking each other with the hose…wildly shaking their hair to rid it of water… sweat glistening off their flexing arms and chest as they wrestled with animals to bring them into submission-

I would soon be no better than the men if I started to fantasize as they did.

Wasn't that meant to be a male fantasy anyway?

"Kiba was nice enough to lend me one."

"A dog?"

"A _shirt_." He replied with a confused voice as he got off the bed.

"Did you have fun with Sai?" I asked, wondering if the feelings between them had been mutual.

He shrugged as he picked out a shirt from his closet.

"I would suppose so, he and I spent quite some time together before Tenten found us."

"Did she?" My curiosity brought me back to the color stained skin I had encountered in both my friends.

"Yes, then I realized I was a bit of a third wheel and decided to meet up with Maito and Kakashi." He stated, his casual mention of his teacher's first name instead of his respectful last annoying me a bit.

"You know…I've been meaning to ask you…are they…?"

"No, they are simply friends Sakura, nothing more." Lee corrected rather quickly.

"But they both had paint over weird _places_!" I exclaimed.

"I spilled a jar of green paint I was preparing, we all got sprayed with it." He explained. "And anyway, I do not think they would suit each other."

"Who says?" I challenged. "Tenten isn't some little girl you know, if she likes Sai then-"

"She does NOT."

"How do you know?"

"Because I-!..." he rubbed his temples in annoyance to my defiant attitude. "Trust me Sakura…she does not. Just drop it."

"And what's wrong with _you_?" I asked, crossing my arms and giving him an angry look.

"A girl just tried to cop a feel-how do you _THINK_ a guy would feel?" he exclaimed as he raised his hands up angrily.

"Flattered?"

Again, my humor was not winning me points in this conversation.

"Sorry." I immediately muttered before Lee could open his mouth. "That _was_ pretty rude of me to just come here uninvited."

"I do not care about that, I just wish you would wake me up in a more…subtle way." He mumbled.

"Is caressing you not _subtle_?"

"Not when you scare me in the process."

"Sorry." I apologized shyly once more as gave him a grin.

"It is all right…just…do not do that again." He responded wearily. "So what brings you here?"

I looked at him nearly offended.

"Do I need a reason?"

"No…no I suppose not."

I stood from the bed, suddenly feeling unwanted in this setting.

"Sorry, did I come at a bad time?" I asked politely, being cautious to not start a fight.

"Afraid you did."

The pungent replies were not making this a pleasant experience.

"Have you been taking your medication?" was my softly said question.

"And what if I have not?" he challenged back.

"Then you need to take it because you promised me-"

"Do you really not trust me Sakura? I am no fool, I _have_ been taking them."

"Then why did you say-"

"What is it with you and your lack of trust? What will happen once I am allowed to go on missions again and you do not have confidence in me?" He asked with an unyielding stern expression.

My veins nearly burst at his reckless words. An overwhelming sense of lividness erupted within my body as I fought the urge to scream in aggravation at him.

"But you won't Lee." Was my calm reply. "Don't be stupid! You _won't_ be going on any missions any time soon!" I angrily pointed out. "For now just bear it, take your medicine, go to your therapy, and-!"

"I cannot be kept in this village forever Sakura…Lady Hokage will start to give me missions _eventually_." He said quietly.

The silent and tense look he gave me proved otherwise.

I bit my lower lip.

"Who says?" I asked, wondering where the roots of this problem were.

Lee rubbed the back of his neck disquietly and looked at me as though I were a hindrance.

"I am…well you see…damn it. This is so inconvenient, I was hoping to see you at a better time for this." he mumbled as he continued to avoid eye contact.

"What is it?"

Alarm grew within me as my breath ran to a halt.

"I am to return…to doing missions by the end of the month…that is- if my progress is deemed creditable by Lady Hokage."

He continued to keep his eyes off mine as he said this, never daring to meet.

Once more I felt like beating sense into this idiot. "You…WHAT?! Is she _crazy_?! You're in NO condition to be going on missions any time soon!" I bellowed, amazed at my master's careless decision.

"I will be able-"

"NO! I will go to her immediately ask demand that she reconsider your condition!" I interrupted, not caring for whatever Lee had to say.

"Sakura, I want to go on missi-"

"YOU WON'T! I-I….I won't let you!" I exclaimed, tightly clenching both my fists from his adamant pleading.

"Why are you so upset about it!? You are _just_ like Neji!" He finally shouted back, his soft voice obliterated by my mood. "Neither of you trust me, both of you think I will run off and kill myself!"

"It's happened before, that's why we're so worried about you!" I tried to knock sense into the fool.

"And I am _SICK_ and _TIRED_ of people worrying about me! I am not a child who needs _protection_! I am not the helpless genin you first met! I am _not_ the Lee you used to _KNOW_!"

"I AM AWARE OF THAT LEE! I'M NO _IDIOT_!" I began to demonstrate my boundless maturity by launching a pillow at his face. "SO STOP _TREATING_ ME LIKE ONE!"

Lee shoved the bed adornment aside with a gruesome force, causing it to split open and explode into a rain of feathers.

"You have gotten what you wanted Sakura! I have attended all my therapy sessions, I have swallowed every damn pill and medication you jammed down my throat, I have practically become the ideal boyfriend in terms of obedience! What _more_ could you possibly want _now_?" he asked, his visage a mixture of scorn and confusion.

"What I _want_?" I could only gasp. "Lee, this was never about what _I_ wanted-"

"Oh, but it was Sakura. YOU made me receive therapy when I did not wish it, YOU made me make amends with my comrades when it was none of your business, and YOU….you…" his voice violently wavered as he attempted to utter the rest of the words, "you made me feel like I deserved it."

"Lee….it-it's not working. I know you're just trying to get me to hate you like last tim-"

"Sakura, I did everything you have asked of me, I got help and overcame my fears…you received your attention from me…what more would you want before you allow me to leave?"

"_Leave_?"

The repeated last word rung deeply in my chest, pricking the tender organ inside it mercilessly.

I should have known.

"So that's what it was all about…" I muttered, my hands falling limply by my sides as I caved, "You never wanted to get better…were you just _using_ me so you could leave again to find your father?"

"NO." at this he appeared insulted. "I worded that wrong. I _never_ used you, my feelings are as they always have been. Stop making me look like I manipulated you!"

"But you DID manipulate me!" I hissed. "I just can't believe I was too _stupid_ to see it before. You made me feel like you cared for me out of your own free will-_not_ out of some _sick_ motive to get back at your father!"

"Sakura, that is not it at _all_! Why do you not listen to me!?" he pleaded in vain as he tried to hold on to my hand.

"Why should I?" I snapped while jerking it away from him, "I'm sorry…all this time I've been trying to understand you. All this _damn_ time I've just wasted my time and energy on you! And you know what I figured out? I don't _know_ you at all."

Lee appeared to be in a trance when I spoke those icy stringent words. His bottom lip disappeared inside his mouth as he bit it, trying to keep whatever pungent replies he had at bay.

"Sakura…do not do this to me…" He groused as he placed a lone hand on top of his forehead. "I knew this would turn out badly, but please do not say that to me."

"I. Don't. Know. You." I repeated, spilling my malice over every syllable. "And I wish I never entered your life."

He would never change, not ever, not even after all the caresses, the kisses, the hushed whispers. Never.

'_Never.' _

Our relationship was worthless.

It was in a rut.

At this point it was simply better to call it quits before he filled my life with misery.

"Sakura I-"

"I don't CARE what you have to say Lee! Just…I don't care, I'm leaving." I professed as I rose from the bed and made my way out the bedroom door.

"Sakura would you listen to me!?" he entreated behind me.

I turned back around only to furiously shove him against a wall.

"I _HAVE_!…ALL this time I've been listening to you Lee…and you know what? I'm _sick_ of it! I'm SICK of it! I can't stand how you toy around with me and then expect me to believe we mean something. I'm _SICK_ of being belittled by every damn word that comes out of your mouth! I wish I could just forget about you and-"

"Sakura I love you!"

The words silenced me, but moved nothing within me.

My heart was still shattered, the wad of antipathy still lingered in my throat, and my knuckles paled with fury that refused to be allayed. My eyes were arid, they could spare no more grief for the man in front of me. They did not want to commit such a disparaging act. I could only stare at Lee in the midst of our belligerent cries and rueful acts of viciousness. He had placed both his hands over his lips, looking somewhat terrified of what he had confessed. His eyes had soon turned glassy with each choked breath he dared to take. A repressed whimper was heard, but I had no means to discover if it had risen from me or him.

"Lee…save it, I'm _sick_ of listening to you. I'm sick of even _looking_ at you." I retorted as I made my way past him to the door. "If you're not going to let me leave then you'll regret it."

"Sakura, please! Do not go!" he pleaded as he rushed to the entrance, apparently blocking my path. "You do not understand what I meant to say! I did not simply _use_ you! I would _never_ do that to you!"

"Get out of my way." I ordered, but was denied as Lee placed his hands on my shoulders.

"No. Sakura…I love you far too much to let you walk away from my life."

"Too late for that…I've been doing that ever since you decided to play with me." I responded dryly, wriggling out of his touch with a peeved face.

My resistance only resulted in having his arms encircle my body with no chance to escape. His scent that I had once loved now repulsed me as I was embraced. I tried to break free out of his gentle grasp, wanting more than anything to rid myself of his contact, but was only rewarded with a kiss to my forehead. The man's breathing, which had slowly surrendered to coming in short uneven gasps, eventually gave way to choked words. It made me wonder why my cheeks were wet.

'_Not now…not now…__**NOT**__. __**NOW**_.' I inwardly begged as shame flooded through me for crying in front of Lee again.

"Sakura…please, I LOVE you-"

"But I _don't_, I-"

"I do not CARE about that! Do you not UNDESTAND!?" he screamed as he tightened his grip around me, "I love you enough to not _CARE_ about your reaction! I love you so much to the point where I do not care whether my feelings are returned or not! Just allow me the freedom and decency of expressing how I feel for you!" he cried, his whimpers growing as he held on to me.

It had taken me a few moments to realize these tears trickling down my cheeks were not my own.

They were Lee's.

The briny liquid flowed copiously down his eyes as he shut them tightly, looking humiliated of presenting himself like this in front of me.

"I do not care Sakura…I love you and yet you are not allowing me to say it! I.LOVE. You." He whispered, his poor voice hoarse from his earlier yells. "I am sick of you telling me what I should do or say in order to make you believe I am fine. For once…let me say what I truly feel."

A familiar light pressure graced my face as Lee's words rung genuinely in my mind. I closed my eyes, wondering why it felt so lovely despite its brackish taste. Something soft made contact with my neck, my cheek, and forehead. I attempted to shove the sensation away, cringing when it touched where they had started. I tried opening my eyes, shutting them quickly when they were not inured to the blinding light of his doorway. My lightheaded stupor from whatever he had done had thwarted my plans to push the man away from me. I hated myself for it. I hated both Lee and myself. My vision regained control only to find Lee staring back at me, his lips moist and slightly parted.

He had just kissed me.

_He_ had kissed me.

For the second time since his talk with his teacher.

"Lee…" I gasped, my body trying to regain the oxygen that had been stolen from me.

He allowed me no time to regain my composure, however, as he possessed my lips once more. A hand slowly unwrapped itself from my back and lifted my chin for better access. I fought against myself to shove him away, but my body would not heed me. Taking what strength my hand would allow, I took hold of his face, caressing it to ease Lee…

…and slammed my fist into it.

Perhaps I had not been thinking. Perhaps I had placed too much anger in that jab…or perhaps I had suppressed this horrible emotion every time we fought and barely taken the time to release it at that precise moment.

Whatever reasoning my mind conjured up, it grew difficult to ignore the guilt I felt when I noticed a few specks of blood staining my knuckles as Lee's back hit the side of the door with a deafening crack.

Taking no time to even check the damage I had inflicted on him, I calmly walked out of the room and headed for the door that would lead me outside and out of his life.

"Wait…Sakura…" I heard him call after me, yet my head would not turn around to acknowledge him.

"Go away…I won't hesitate to use more force next time." I warned icily.

"I do not care…it is nothing compared to what I will feel if you decide to walk out that door."

I stopped in my tracks, looking back at the idiot walking towards me. The damage on his cheek was apparent; a huge red mark was already forming on the skin as a thin trail of blood seeped past his lips.

"Please do not leave…I do not want to lose the most precious person I have." He begged as he leaned body against the living room door.

"You will find another…"I retorted.

"No…because they are not you."

"Save it! You think after all these years I'll-"

Again his battered lips muffled any insults I had reserved for him.

His hands were no longer holding me, I was free to escape if I wished for it…

…and yet.

Dry blood became damp as it made contact with my mouth. His hands reached up to caress and cup my face, supplicating me to return the affection.

"I love you. I do not care how many times you shove or slap me…I will still love you." He stated before reclaiming me.

"I hate you…I hate you Lee…" I growled, yet found it unnerving how I could not move away from him.

"I do not care…"

I cursed myself once more for my pathetic will. Standing on the tips of my feet was all I could do in order to reach his sweet mouth. He smiled nervously against my lips when he realized how fervently I was trying to support my weight. My scorn had dissipated into passion and need, my words of insults and curses were muffled by his lips. I quickly stopped complaining once he lowered his head to solve my height predicament. Hands that had once been planning to slap him away were now stroking his face, wiping away the remaining dampness of his tears.

His lips left my own, forcing me to lean against him in hopes of being kissed again.

"I…love you Sakura," His stern, humorless voice reminded me we were not in the best of moods. "I love you and yet you do not dare listen to me."

"It's….really hard to tell whether you love me or not…this is…the first time in months you've kissed me." I mumbled against his shirt, my body enervated from our fight and his lips pressing against my own.

Wiping his eyes with the palm of his hand, he rid himself of his tears, his face looking to the side away from me in shame.

"I am sorry…I probably look like a complete coward to you."

"No you don't." I said as I took swigs of air. "I'm just glad…"

"Sakura…please believe me!…I would _never_ use you." He swore as he kissed my forehead. "I simply want all of you to trust me so I can continue to live my life normally. Do you think I _enjoy_ watching my team worry for me?"

He kissed my cheeks.

"Or watching _you_ worry?" he continued.

He kissed my jaw.

"I want to be able to leave on missions and not take that horrid medication, I want to be able to live unwatched and trusted. I want to be able to live with _you_!"

My hands tightened around the fabric of his shirt as I patiently listened to him and allowed his actions, taking in each and every word.

"Is it wrong for me to want to live this way Sakura?"

"No…no it's not wrong at all." I answered, having a deeper understanding for his frustration.

(At this point, I was more interested in what his mouth was _doing_ rather than _saying_."

His hands now traveled to my waist and brought me closer to him, our noses bumping playfully against each other.

"May I please kiss you again?" he asked, his lips already softly caressing my own. "Slap me…kill me, I do not care-just grant me this."

I shakily nodded my head to his request, my breaths coming in short uneven intervals.

"I wouldn't kill you…" I uttered. "You just…I don't know."

He closed his eyes, leaning his head against my own.

And leaned in to capture me.

"Please forgive me Sakura…you deserve so much more than this…I have been…a terrible man to you."

I was no longer listening.

I wanted to open my mouth-to open _his_! I wanted to explore every crevice inside those heavenly lips of his, but my confidence would allow no such thing. Although the kiss was wonderful…it was much too innocent, too chaste, too callow…too _Lee_. I wanted more, I yearned for it. Releasing my hands from against his chest, I hastily wrapped them behind his neck, begging his mouth for approval as I deepened the kiss. Lee unclasped his hand from my waist and held it against my neck, forcing my body against him even closer. I crushed my body against his, trying against all odds to feel him closer to me. His rigid chest frantically rose with each kiss we shared, his hands traveling like mad on my neck and back, always pleading for more.

"O…open…your…" I could not finish seeing as how my mouth was occupied.

"I am sorry…" he muttered between kisses. "I am afraid I am quite new to this."

"Just…" again I preferred to keep quiet rather than embarrass myself.

"Tell me what you want me to do." He whispered in a voice that nearly begged for my guidance.

"Open…your…li-" My eyes widened as Lee read my mind and timidly slid open his mouth.

I let out a dry chuckle when I heard something that resembled a surprised moan from him as our mouths created a damp contact.

'_He really __**is**__ new to this.' _

I had no room to talk.

I could only continue to close my eyes and think of what came next.

I began to inwardly panic when I realized I didn't know what to do with my tongue. Would he be insulted if I licked his lips? Would he be disgusted if it touched _his_? It was Lee's turn to chuckle when he probably sensed my alarm judging from my suddenly tense movements. I felt his hand underneath my chin, silently encouraging me to do whatever it was that I wanted to do. It was only when I kept hesitating that I felt something soft protruding against my top lip. I smiled when I realized Lee was better at kissing than I was. His moist and flexible tongue timidly brushed against my own, encouraging me to do the same. By now I could swear my heartbeats were audible even to Lee.

Eventually, I forced myself out of my introverted actions and mimicked whatever he did, trying to keep up as best as I could. One of his hands continued to guide my chin and tilt it towards him, never allowing me to lose contact. His other slid further down my back until it rested on my lumbar region.

'_This is heaven…I hope it goes on longer, I wish it went on forever . It better not…I hope it doesn't __**ever**__-'_

"STOP!" Lee's voice rung through the room and finally granted me escape when I did not wish for it.

I struggled for breath, dazed and puzzled from his abrupt order.

What had brought this change in the young boy I had no way of knowing. He fixed his eyes on me, allowing one of his hands to gently clasp the top button of my shirt. My heart would soon exhaust itself in the midst of a frisson. His lips met my own for a brief second until he pulled my body away from the door and back into his bedroom. My limp body could only obediently follow suit as I wondered what was on his mind. Being wary not to surprise me, he gently sat me down on his bed. I expected him to sit next to me but grew confused when he (much to my dismay) decided to stand on his knees in front of me on the floor. I felt the rest of my body forgo its blood as it traveled to my face. Lee bit his lip and gathered my hands in his.

"Sakura, do you still love me as well?" he asked earnestly, his chest rising frantically.

"I…o-of course I love you…" I stuttered, my face still flushed. "I'm sorry…I did not mean those horrible things. I really-"

"Sakura…I am no longer going to tell you what to do or how to feel, if you want to make love then…I will gladly comply."

My eyes widened from his sudden brash statement.

"Wha-? Lee I think we should-!" my words were lost inside Lee's mouth as he pushed me against the pillows and fallen stray feathers from the pillow he had obliterated.

"I will not hurt you." He whispered softly in my ear. "Please…allow me to give you this."

The assurance was hardly comforting at this moment.

With minor effort, he managed to rid himself of his shirt, allowing it to sensually slip off his skin as he repeated the same act with my own. My blood rushed to my face as I felt my arms automatically rise despite my refusal. I found myself covering my chest in alarm. At first I could say nothing as I stared at his bare chest for the first time in a situation that didn't include me barging in on him, healing his wounds after fighting with him, or unknowingly sexually harassing him. The man who had (up until a few months ago) said he would never show me his body was now _willingly_ revealing it to me. He smiled at my surprised reaction and kissed my collarbone. Though I still possessed my bra, I _already_ felt exposed in front of him.

Was this how he felt when I first saw him shirtless?

Leaving me no time to even breathe, Lee continued to ravage my mouth with the same enthusiasm I only saw him use while training. It took all the sediments of will power I had left just to tilt my head away from him when I felt something on my back had come undone. My nervous fidgeting probably only encouraged Lee into thinking I was merely impatient. He chuckled once more against my lips and brought one hand to the top of my shorts, allowing his fingers to slip them off with ease before playfully caressing the fabric of my undergarment that lined my hips. For a moment I wondered if I should allow him to continue, allow myself to see what else he would do. A pang of curiosity tempted me into assuaging my whimpers, forcing them down if only to see what he would do next.

"HEY!" I shrieked when I felt him trying to pull my bra away as he kissed my neck.

"What is the matter?" he whispered softly into my ear. "Would you like to go slower? Faster? Tell me whatever you want done and I will do it."

"N-no…no i-it's n-not that." I stuttered, shivering once I felt the cool air touching my exposed waist from his prior actions with my shirt. My eye wandered through the room, never daring to rest on Lee's face lest I fainted from the stress.

"Ah…I think I know what is wrong." He said in an almost teasing voice as I felt his weight rise away from my body. .

"You _do_?" I asked, a bit relieved from having such an understanding boyfriend. "Oh good…I'm so glad you decided to wai-"

"Because I find it quite typical-if not impertinent for…well…" he ran his fingers through his hair as he fought to voice his thoughts.

"What?"

"I agree with you as well…" he began, only to worsen my confusion. "I do not want you to be…in this _position_." He gulped and chuckled nervously at his odd confession.

"…What do you mean?" I asked, even more puzzled from his senseless words. "What the hell are you talking about?"

"Well…I think a man should allow…should allow his love to have the '_upper hand_' with this kind of thing…do you not agree?..." again he did not know how to clearly state his thoughts as a streak of blood seeped to his face.

"You mean you want to be on the bottom?" I asked flatly, growing surprised as I used my arms to cover myself once I found out my bra had _somehow_ gotten into Lee's hand.

'_How'd he get that?' _

Well, he _was_ known for his speed.

"No-no!" he wildly waved his arms above his head in panic. "That is not exactly what I mean-or at least…n-not what I really-that is to say-!"

My blank stare only worsened the blush that spread throughout his entire face.

"It is just that…." He brought his lips against my forehead before completely getting off me, "I hate the fact that men just _assume_ that women will lie down and…"

"I-it's all right Lee." I mumbled, wanting to spare ourselves the embarrassing topic.

'_He's so far off from what I wanted to say.' _

"So…" he said seductively before kissing my bottom lip. "I would like to start _this_…"

My mind immediately went back into shock as I felt his hands quickly pull me towards him, allowing me to comfortably sit astride in the middle of his lap. He by no means wanted to lie on _his_ back as we began; his mouth formed a mischievous smile that only roused my curiosity over his following actions. He lifted his upper body until he sat upright, letting his back be supported against the headboard behind him. He was now facing me (although I preferred to stare down at my arms wrapped around my chest, trying ardently to shield myself from his inquiring gaze.) I felt lips that had once been far too shy to even _speak_ to me now travel freely through my body, kissing any exposed skin they touched.

He chuckled when he realized I still held my arms on top of my chest, trying to cover myself in vain.

"What is the matter Sakura?" he questioned as he brought his face close to mine. "Are you still hesitant?"

"N-no…" I shakily answered.

"Then?"

"What if I'm…" it was an ordeal to try to talk as I felt his lips against my neck, "what if I'm not what you expected? What if I'm-" the question could find no more air to be said as he began to gently pull my hands away from my chest.

"You are 'gorgeous' to me so far." The compliment was repeated to me. "I am sure the rest of you is as well."

My arms began to quake with fear.

My breaths grew into hastened ragged pants.

My arid throat provided no help to my thirsty lips.

We still had not gotten very far…I could still stop this…it wasn't too late…it wasn't futile yet…I could…I could still…get away.

"Wait…Lee…please…don't." My begging resembled that of an abused child.

It had taken little more than a second before he immediately stopped his actions and pulled himself out from under me.

"What is wrong? Is this not what you wanted?" he asked with a baffled look before realization slapped itself across his face and he began to panic. "I am deeply sorry for having been so callous and-!"

"It _IS _what I _want_! Trust me Lee it _is_! It's just-!" I growled in frustration when I couldn't gather my thoughts.

"Are you frightened that it will hurt?" he asked as his face began to look adorably dejected from not knowing what perturbed me so. "Or are you afraid…" his downcast eyes lowered away from my own, "are you afraid of seeing something that…you will not…like?"

"_NO-NO!_ There is _NOTHING_ wrong with _you_ Lee!" I assured while I mustered an embarrassed chuckle. "Trust me, you have NOTHING to be worried about in that factor."

Lee truly _was_ modest in almost anything he did.

"Is it because I am fat?" he asked with an expression more disconsolate and endearing than his last.

By this point I _had_ to burst into a fit of laughter from his odd question.

"N-no Lee! Where do you get this from!?" I blurted out as I tried to gasp for air. "It's just….just because I _think_ about sex and _ask_ about it and _talk_ about it all the time with you doesn't mean I'm going to actually _DO_ it!"

"B-but…y-you just said that-"

"I _KNOW_ what I said!-but I…I'm…I'm….I'm scared now." I admitted the last part rather meekly.

Lee sat bewildered for a brief minute, unable to comprehend my sudden self-contradiction.

The stifled snicker that followed nearly made me want to slap him.

"Shut up Lee."

"Well, _this_ is priceless, I am finally ready to have sex and _you_ are the one telling me to wait. I never thought you would do this!" he exclaimed before bursting into another fit of chuckles.

"SHUT UP!"

"It is just too funny!" he began to laugh even harder to worsen my mood.

"I swear Lee, if you don't stop it I will-"

"I am joking Sakura! Just joking!" he tried to control himself in vain.

I sighed in relief while I yanked my bra away from him while one of my arms covered me.

"Well I…I am glad that you decided to wait after all Sakura…" he teased again as he turned his head away from me to let me change. "I was worried you were willing to go through with everything."

"Just shut up will you?" I asked as I pulled my shirt over my head to cover me. "You're such an idiot."

Knowing I was decent (or at least _half_ decent since I couldn't find my shorts courtesy of him) he turned his eyes back toward me and smiled. He stretched his whole body in front of me and I could have sworn he was teasing me with what I COULD have had. Paying no mind to the fact that he was only wearing his boxer shorts, the seminude man supported himself with his elbows before he gave up the (at the time, somewhat erotic) position and landed on his back.

"You have a…nice body though Sakura…" he admitted randomly.

"If you say so." I joked.

"Now look who is self-conscious."

"Just be quiet Lee."

"I just fail to understand why you did not speak up sooner. I feel rather guilty about not making sure this is what you wanted." He said apologetically as he reached his hand our and ran the back of his fingers against my cheek.

"Well…part of me didn't want to do that. I guess I wanted to see where it would lead…that and…" my eyes wandered to his own before looking away in embarrassment.

He laughed and playfully poked my forehead as he persuaded me to speak.

"What is it? Why else did you not stop?" he asked with a smile, lifting his head up to meet my own.

I turned my face away and wished he would drop the subject or at least come up with a new one.

"You know, if we are to ever have an 'intimate' relationship we must learn to stop hiding our thoughts from each other." He whispered. "Now tell me what was on your mind."

"I…I just didn't…" I took a profound breath, allowing my blood to regress from my face before gathering up the nerve to speak once more. "I-I just…didn't want to seem…._selfish_." the last word that left my lips was barely audible to the point that I found Lee leaning his ear against me just to hear properly.

"Selfish? In what way? You were just not ready." He said simply.

"No…selfish because…I didn't know...if you were…already…" as soon as he saw my eyes glance at his lap he burst out laughing.

"Is that what you thought? You worry far too much Sakura, I have ample self-restraint! You did not 'ruin' anything for me." He assured.

"But I felt _horrible_ interrupting you in the middle of it all!" I tried to explain as I flailed my hands in the air. "I didn't know whether you were already…" again my voice was unsuccessful as I hung my head low when I said the last word, "…_aroused_."

Lee laughed once more at my seemingly petty concerns while my face began to burn.

"Sakura, if anything, I was more concerned for _you_!" he professed.

"Why?"

"I feared I might be going too fast for you, or not fast _enough_. I do not know since women…take longer than men…I suppose." He added shyly.

"But I really…_really_ wanted to see you again like I did last time." I mumbled, fighting back the blush creeping to my face.

"Like last time?" he wondered, innocently raising an index finger to his chin. "Oh, I see, when you ripped the towel away from me?"

"I didn't _rip_ it away." I corrected smugly.

"Yes, you simply gave me _ample_ time to react as you fondled me." He pointed out derisively, albeit with a smile.

"Jerk…" I muttered as I began my search for my shorts (which still had failed to make an appearance in his room.) "Where the hell did you fling my shorts?"

"I do not know…" he said as he rubbed the side of his face. "Leave them off…otherwise you will make me feel left out."

I stared at the mark, realizing I had created a small cut across his lower lip.

"I-I'm sorry."

"As I have said Sakura, you did not ruin anything for m-"

"I mean for hitting you." I pointed out, knowing well I would never forgive myself for hurting him as I had. "I feel…like a terrible person."

"…Oh…it…it is all right." He muttered.

"But there was _blood_ on it and-!"

"You did not hit me too hard." He assured. "It does not hurt…it just.._surprised_ me I guess."

"I'm sorry." I repeated. "I'm so…so…so sorry."

At this Lee smiled and leaned his head against my mouth.

"Do not apologize…you were just defending yourself."

"But you weren't even DOING anything!" I exclaimed guiltily. "I'm sorry!"

He placed his thumb on my lips, running it over them to calm my apologies.

"Kiss me." He simply replied as though it would solve my problem.

"_What_?" I said in disbelief. "I just hurt you and all you want is-"

"Do not apologize, just kiss me."

"But!-"

My back rested against the tangled bed sheets of the mattress as I felt his weight shift over me. His mouth eagerly silenced me and opened to let me do as I liked with him. I wrapped my legs around the opposite sides of his waist, pulling him closer to me while my arms embraced him toward my chest. He smiled in return, running his hands up and down my legs in a seducing manner.

"And _you_ were the one who said to wait." he taunted.

"It's not _sex_ if we're _clothed_." I corrected with a scoff.

"But the way we are…makes it seem as though that is what is going to happen next."

"But it _won't_."

"Sakura…may I please ask something of you?"

The abrupt, yet non sequitur question made me stop holding on to him long enough to give him my attention.

"What is it?" I asked, somewhat knowing what his usual request would be.

Only this time I knew my answer would be different.

"Well…" he mumbled as he pulled himself away from me and rubbed the back of his neck. His eyes kept wandering to (what I assumed) were my thighs.

Alarm collided into my consciousness when my mind immediately dumped itself in the gutter. I instinctively placed both my hands below my waist when I realized I was wearing nothing but undergarments. (Funny how over a year ago I would have run screaming into my room if he ever saw me in this state.)

"No…it is nothing _sexual_!" he blurted out in shock. "Sakura, is that _all_ you think I want?"

His smirk informed me he was only teasing, but I was getting rather peeved from generally being wrong about what he wanted.

"Wh-what is it then?" I puffed, letting my body relax.

Lee chuckled and turned his gaze away from me as he continued to rub his neck.

"Well…I…may I please rest my head on your lap?" he asked with a pleading face, being sure to press both his hands together as if to accentuate the importance of this request.

The odd inquiry puzzled me and I felt my brow rise from his bizarre behavior.

"What? Why?"

"It is just that…when I saw your father and mother on the couch that time. It was when I came over for dinner, remember?…And they appeared to be quite happy." He seemed to ramble over the memory as his fingers slowly began to fidget with one another.

"Is that all?" I asked in disbelief from his extreme coyness in this matter.

"Yes, but I-I suppose if you do not feel comfortable then I _certainly_ prefer you to do whatever it is you wish and-"

"Lee, come here." I said with a laugh at his suddenly swift and nervous words.

With a welcoming smile, I tugged his body into me and rested his head on my lap just as he had desired. Why he decided to still be so polite despite our recent actions was a wonder to me. I shook my head at his sweet manners and allowed Lee to lie comfortably on my legs. He closed his eyes and leaned against my legs in contentment. The relaxed sighs he released as I ran my fingers through his black hair only made me giggle in delight. His smile only grew broader when I imitated what my mother did while my father rested on her lap.

"Sakura…next time…promise me you will not hesitate to tell me anything when we make love. I want it to be…a pleasant experience for you." He pleaded. "I want it to be…very wonderful for you to say the least."

"Likewise. It's so stressing not knowing what you're thinking!"

His genuine laughter filled the empty walls of his room as he softly nudged my wrists with his nose.

"I really wish…I would give _anything_…if we could one day rest in the living room like your parents do every night they are home."

"Well…" I said rather cautiously, "who's to say we won't?"

Lee's head nearly shot up from my lap in excitement. "A-are you telling me you actually see me as an option?" He asked incredulously, his eyes blinking rapidly from my confession.

"I'm hoping to see you as my _future_ Lee." I whispered as I cupped his face in my hand and placed it back down on my legs.

"Sakura, you do not know what you speak of…just look at us…how-how in the world would we make a _marriage_ work?"

"With love, respect, patience, commitment, responsibility, and most important: hard work. _That_ part will be easy for you." I teased.

"But how can you even _think_ of me as a possible husband? What if I cannot be what you expect of me?" he continued to oppose my wishes.

I giggled and had to bend my head down to kiss him. "Hey, I'm not exactly anyone's idea of a perfect wife either."

"You are perfect to me." He mumbled, lifting his lips higher so as to not part with mine when I lifted my head away from him.

"No." he whined in irritation as soon as my lips left his own.

I tried to hold back a tiny sense of satisfaction when I realized I was _finally_ the one tormenting Lee with inadequate physical pleasure.

"I'm sorry Lee, but if I do recall, _this_ is the time you'd say you have to walk me home." I teased with a smug face.

"Then stay here." He said rather simply. "I do not mind."

"No, it is 'improper'!" I mocked his favorite speeches. "How _dare_ you say something as '_indecent'_ as that in a relationship that has chosen to be abstinent?"

"Ah, you tease me _now_, but you will thank me one day." He reminded as he waved his index finger in a dignified manner.

"And what day will _that_ be I wonder?"

"When I make up for all those nights you did not spend with me of course." He whispered huskily in my ear before jumping completely off the bed.

"You _better_ it up to me!" I grumbled, already abhorring his contact as he began to pull me off as well.

"I will! I promise you!" the man said confidently while handing me my shorts (the idiot had apparently been hiding them behind his back this whole time) and putting his clothes back on. "When I come back from my missions and when you are finally ready, when _both_ of us are ready…I…I will make love to you as many times as you wish! I will stay in bed with you all day! I will do _anything_ you ask of me as soon as I come back!" he exclaimed happily.

I gulped in exhilaration at the mere _thought_ of looking forward to such a thing.

(It nearly made me want to send Lee off on a mission already.)

"If you say so…" I said, concealing my obvious excitement with a cool façade as I slipped on my shorts and accompanied Lee to his door.

"So…does this indicate that you are now my girlfriend?" he asked with a wide smile, his hand making its way around mine.

I slapped a free hand across my face and dragged it down at his resolute mind.

"What do _you_ think?"

"I do not want to assume anything until I _hear_ it from you." He replied cheerfully as he closed the lock.

"Then ask me again."

"_Again_?"

"Yes."

A sigh on his part.

A chuckle on behalf of mine.

"Sakura Haruno, will you please be my girlfriend? I vow to protect you with my life," was his verbatim confession from our first meeting.

I laughed and nodded my head. "Yes, seeing as how I've got nothing to _do_ nowadays."

"Well…what about _me_?"

I choked on what seemed thin air from his first (and rather stirring) lecherous suggestion.

"I really _am_ rubbing off on you." I mumbled. "…getting more perverted by the day."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A streak of the sun rising crept over the village once Lee finished walking me back home. My eyelids wished for respite, but my mind ordered me to go take a shower before resting to at least relax from the frantic turn of events. A gentle squeeze to my hand on Lee's behalf made my head tilt against his shoulder. We had taken our time on our way back, being sure to steal affectionate caresses or kisses while we still could. Lee had apparently found out he _liked_ the contact and made it a routine to cover my lips in his every block we walked. I laughed when he landed one last avid kiss on me as my house came into view.

"You'll see me tomorrow Lee, you're kissing me like I'm going away for a trip." I remarked.

"It is fun though! I love to do it." He explained as his fingertips touched his mouth. "Is it wrong for me to make up for all the times I did not kiss you?"

"Make it up to me once I've had some sleep. You've kept me up all night." Was my complaint.

"I do not think you will find rest just yet." He responded with a spontaneous dead tone.

I raised my head to give him a questioning look for his sudden change in mood. The black haired man merely pointed at my house with an unpleasant expression on his face.

"What are you-?..."

The familiar silhouette of a lone figure resting before house stopped my voice. His body was motionless, his sprawled legs and crossed arms giving him a laidback form. As I pondered what the idiot could be doing here, I noticed his head hung heavily downwards, implicating the appearance of sleep. How long had he been there? My body tensed with guilt when the possibility of him waiting all night by my door crossed my mind. I gently took hold of Lee's sleeve, motioning to hurry to the porch. The unusually serene boy's body instinctively stirred as he heard footsteps approaching. The mountain of golden hair immediately ascended to reveal a pair of weary individuated blue eyes. They greeted me with an odd sense of appreciation.

"Sakura." His voice lacked its usual luster, its predictable boisterous tone.

I didn't like it.

"Hi…Naruto you idiot, what are you doing here so late at night…or so early in the morning?" I hastily corrected myself. "You'll catch a cold if you stay here." I scolded playfully in hopes of rousing a cheerful reaction from my teammate.

There was none.

Merely a simple and hoarse, "Yeah, you're right."

The blonde shoved his hands inside his pockets and leaned against my wall as he rose from the wooden porch, giving my boyfriend a simple acknowledging upwards nod.

"What's up Lee?"

That was it.

No endearing nicknames, no exchanged smiles, no bodily movement that would suggest they were on amicable terms.

Lee's eyes met with Naruto's for a brief moment, a silent warning I couldn't decipher being sent to one another.

"Hello Naruto."

"Where have you been? I haven't seen you training." The blonde stated rather coldly at the man standing beside me.

There was something unnerving about the way both men seemed to look past me. Naruto's attention soaked into Lee's being. His blue orbs flickered to our entwined hands for a moment and swiftly turned his gaze away in a manner that was almost spiteful. Something was off with my teammate. That much was obvious as he shoved himself away from the wall with a sense of ferocity. Feeling his brief stare like one feels a hot piece of metal against skin, I automatically released Lee's hand and began to distance myself from him.

Somewhat miffed by the motion, Lee gave me a confused look before turning back to his 'comrade'.

"I have been busy." He answered dismally.

"That's not like you at all, is it?" Naruto practically derided him. "It seems training has taken a back seat when it comes to Sak-"

"S-so, what brings you here?" I interrupted the idiot as I tried desperately to brush away the hostility brewing between the two men.

"Well…can I talk with you?" he asked, implying the need for privacy away from the man next to me. "It seems like you've been running away from me all day." He added as he finally tore his eyes away from Lee's and looked at me.

"S-sure." I mumbled before having a moment to think about my words.

At my response, our trio was left silent. Naruto appeared to be surprised from my final acceptance of his request while the other cleared his throat to excuse the uneasiness in the group.

It wasn't until I felt something soft get planted on me cheek that I realized Lee was about to take his leave.

"Sakura, may I see you tomorrow?" he whispered in my ear before laying another kiss dangerously close to the corner of my lips.

Odd…it almost felt like he was _mocking_ Naruto.

'_Well, considering he's never kissed me in front of anyone that's highly probable.'_ I thought.

"Y-yeah, that sounds nice." I uttered helplessly as his lips left my skin.

I could feel Naruto's eyes on me as we saw Lee depart.

I knew I would not hear the end of it once we were alone.

An almost smug sigh erupted from the blonde idiot as Lee finally disappeared through the streets, but my teammate said nothing more.

I quirked an eyebrow after I heard Naruto give off a slight shiver. Noticing his hair had an extra unkemptness about it, I rubbed the fabric of his shirt between my thumb and index finger.

"Your clothes are damp." I stated offhandedly as I unlocked my door and motioned for him to follow.

The eerily silent man followed cautiously through the kitchen, looking as though I had set traps for him.

"Well what are you waiting for?" I asked, apparently irritated, "Come in and take a load off."

"Fine fine." He answered with a smile as he ran towards my living room and jumped over my sofa. "Come on Sakura! You're so slow!" he exclaimed, grinning as though he had not felt left out once.

I smiled back at him and joined him.

It was certainly awe-inspiring how someone so childish and uncontrollable could ever grow into such a decent young man. Although Naruto was known to have his brief spouts of childishness, he never stopped being the caring and responsible boy who was well known and loved. The room was silent between us as we continued to sit on opposite sides of the couch. There seemed to be over three feet of distance between us yet it felt like three centimeters with how uncomfortable I was. In his hands, Naruto held a cup of ramen I had quickly prepared. The fact that it had remained untouched was enough to tell me he had not come all this way simply to tell me a piece of fantastic news. Something was horribly amiss.

"Sorry." He finally muttered to break me away from my tense state.

"Sorry?...For what?" I asked with a laugh.

"I completely raided your instant ramen stash last I time I was here with your mom. So...I feel guilty for eating this too." He added with an impish grin.

"Oh…that." I said rather relieved. "Don't worry about it! I'll just drag Lee to the store to buy me some more!"

My joking response threw a metaphorical brick across the delicate glasslike conversation I was nursing with my teammate. Anything concerning Lee had somewhat began to struck a sensitive chord inside Naruto. His fingers suddenly tensed around the Styrofoam cup as his lips continued to tightly press together. Shiftless eyes rejecting to look at me only forced me to brace for an unwanted subject.

"So…how's Bushy Brow been?"

The fact that he had decided to revert to Lee's friendly nickname at least soothed some of my fears. I hoped the man in front me had made a mental rapprochement concerning Lee.

I sighed and began to clear my throat in an effort to choke down the nervous high pitch my voice currently had.

"He's fine…why do you ask?" I added suspiciously.

The blonde shrugged and set down his cup as if to prove the mere casualness of the question.

"I've seen you around with him a lot, that's all. In fact, you've been hanging out with Gai's team more often."

"Is that a bad thing?" I asked briskly.

Naruto held a hand up as if to calm me.

"No, it's not. I'm just saying."

"Well? So what? Lee and Tenten are very nice people, even _Neji_ can be social too." I remarked while being slightly annoyed.

"Well, that's nice. Just..would it kill you to come visit Sasuke and me once in a while? It gets boring talking to myself after a while." He mumbled dejectedly. "He's like talking to a damn corpse."

"Well then who can understand you!?" I said with a laugh. "At first I kept my distance because I figured you'd want to have some 'male bonding' and now you're tired of hanging out with him?"

"But it gets _boring_ with no one to stop our fights! After a while we couldn't believe the _stupid_ things we fought over!" he reminisced with a chuckle.

I joined in with a giggle but kept quiet as I peered at his uneaten noodles.

"So..you didn't wait outside my house until the break of dawn just to tell me to visit you more often did you?" I asked.

"Well…I…no-actually." He stuttered awkwardly with a red streak across his face once the conversation had changed topic. "I wanted you to be the first to know something." He said, his voice slowly turning back to a serious tone.

"What is it?" I asked worriedly, knowing well more than anyone he rarely showed such signs of solemnity.

"I…well not really me…more like Kakashi Sensei and grandma Tsunade…" he scratched his head as he tried to find the proper words.

"Oh?" my interested perked up at the mention of my master's name. "Well, what about her?"

"Well…yeah…" he muttered before leaving his unruly hair alone and sticking his hands inside his pocket. Staring at the ground in disinterest was all he seemed to want to do. "It's not even THAT important but still…I _really_ wanted you to know first since…well…"

"What's this got to do with you? Did something happen?"

The curiosity swelling inside my mind could not longer be maintained.

"Well…now that Sasuke is more or less back…and Grandma Tsunade is thinking about retiring…"

"Spit it OUT Naruto!" I exclaimed, barely able to control my excitement.

"She gave me the position of Hokage….in a few years time that is…"

"Oh…" my eyes grew wide when I finally processed the weight of his words. "_OH_! Naruto th-that's-THAT'S GREAT!" I screamed in excitement, nearly snapping his spinal cord in half when I held him in a tight embrace. "TH-THAT'S SO AWESOME NARUTO! YOU DID IT!"

"Yeah…" he answered again, taking a wavering breath as he said his terse answer.

"Wh…what's wrong? Aren't you _HAPPY_!?" I asked almost irately. (For someone who had just been handed the title of Hokage, his facial expression resembled that of a person receiving the death penalty.)

"N-no, yeah, of course I'm happy…it's just that…I guess it just hasn't sunk in yet." He explained, his impassive stupor increasing the distress in me. "I-I mean…it's not even official yet…I'm sure Kakashi Sensei will take the position before I do so there's no hurry to celebrate."

"So what!? It doesn't mean that you practically got the position _guaranteed_!"

Naruto gave me a tiny smile, one that quickly disappeared.

"What's wrong then?"

"No…nothing is." He responded dryly.

I glanced at him, wondering why he was so apathetic upon hearing he had achieved his life's goal.

"And…how have you been Sakura?"

"Great!"

"No…I mean…how have you been with _Lee_?"

"We've been fine!" I replied happily with a smile.

He returned a halfhearted grin and brought his attention back to his now cold ramen.

"Are you two…?" he bit his lip as he tried to find the words.

"What is it?"

"You know something? He's an idiot." He said rather abruptly.

His voice held a calm fury and spite that seemed unlike him.

"…what?"

"Lee…Sasuke…they're all idiots…_all_ of them. They're jerks who wouldn't know a good thing even if it slapped them across the face…they don't know…"

"What are you getting at Naruto?" I asked, fed up with his bizarre complaining.

"Marry me."

His statement seemed offhanded, almost authoritative as his eyes pierced me with an intensity I only saw him use in the battlefield.

"_What_?"

"Marry me. Right now."

I blinked at Naruto, wondering if the numerous blows to his head he had received in his lifetime had finally caused internal brain damage.

"_What_?" I repeated, not believing his random proposal.

He closed the distance between us, shoving his abandoned ramen aside, and grabbed my hand in both of his. His firm grip only accentuated his need to never release it.

"Marry. Me. Sakura, I swear I won't ever make you cry…I won't make you miserable…I won't _ever_ hurt you…I-I…I won't ever….EVER… _leave_ you." He stammered each promise with fervent assurance.

A few moments painfully dragged on, my mouth completely gaping at the future Hokage before me. My mind was blank, not being able (or _wanting_) to comprehend what he had asked of me.

"Wha…?" It seemed that was all my brain allowed me to voice.

"Sakura, I'm giving myself to you. I give you my word I won't abandon you like those bastards once did…I'll…I'll protect you…"

"Naruto…I.." breath to complete my thoughts once again failed me as I tried to comprehend the boy's audacious proposal. I was aware that he had always been fond of me but never to the extent of wanting anything earnest out of a simple crush. His words accelerated my heart, my blood pumping rapidly up to my face.

He grinned, allowing the corners of his lips to slowly descend when he realized I was still shocked to hear him.

"Sakura…please accept. I swear to make you happy! You'd be well taken care of and I can promise that you'll have no regrets." Naruto continued to cajole me with a grin that grew faltering with each second that passed.

He took hold of my right shoulder (an action that I found _extremely_ bold for all the times I had clobbered him). His endearing foolish smile nearly made every bone in my body become nonexistent. Wet strands of hair pressed against my forehead as Naruto leaned his head against my own, rising my state of alarm from my current situation. A thought worthy of taboo was presented into my mind: Why couldn't it be him? Why couldn't _he_ of been quicker with his confession? A mixture of guilt and longing for a different future plagued me, tempting me into thinking things that did not and _could_ not belong in my mind. My head swirled at the option he was giving me.

Loving Naruto would definitely be "safer"…he was "safe" to love, he had no death wish (and with his stubbornness he wasn't about to die any day soon). And yet….why?…Why did my love for Lee far surpass that of Naruto's?

I…no…this wasn't possible.

As wonderful as my teammate was…

Naruto was not Lee.

"…n….NO!" I managed to utter, finally breaking free of the debate thrashing in my head.

Naruto's blue orbs dilated from the harsh answer, his lips slowly disappearing inside his mouth. He quickly brought a hand to his ruffled hair, scratching it in confusion from my odd reaction.

"N…no?" he echoed the response, his voice trying not to crack as he voiced it.

"No…I…no, I'm sorry Naruto." I mumbled, founding it strange that my eyes refused to make contact with his.

"…No?..."

Again, the horrendous answer was repeated, making it feel as though he was eagerly shoving the verbal knife I had jabbed in his chest.

"I-I'm so sorry Naruto…you're very kind…you're loyal, you're strong, you're sincere-and _damn_ it you are _very_ wonderful…but I-I just can't…Lee and I…"

"Don't say anymore."

"But I'm-"

"It's all right…really it is." He assured with a failing smile, his dejected expression tearing me inwardly. "I…I kind of figured you had something with Lee but I…I still wanted to try, you know?"

"…Hm." I returned the smile, somehow wishing my answer had been different.

Naruto heavily sighed as he brushed his moist hair back with his fingers and allowed the golden locks to fall where they wished.

"I guess I'm just a fool."

"YOU'RE NOT A FOOL!" I yelled back, suddenly fighting the urge to punch him into my door.

"Aren't I? I'M the one who waited for too long, I'M the one who just never worked hard enough for you." he softly responded, his expression completely changing from that of a rejected individual to one embracing a truth.

At the moment…I knew the thought that flew across my mind was twisted but….

Was it wrong to think he looked more striking with a frustrated scowl than a frivolous grin?

"The day I heard Lee had left…I wanted to ask you this. That day…I was so close to your house…so _close_…and yet…and yet I couldn't bring myself to knock the door once I was there!" He muttered as his fidgeting fingers played with the couch pillows. "I-I wish…I wish I wouldn't have left the village."

"Left the village?" I asked in bewilderment. "Naruto, that was a long time ago, and you left to train for Sasuke. We had different goals back then."

"Yeah, I know I know." He replied impatiently. "I guess I'm just trying to make up excuses for my shortcomings."

"_Excuses_?" I snapped, "Those were promises that you made to me you fool! And you have kept your word!"

Naruto merely chuckled at my futile attempts to ease his failure.

"Sakura…you know what?"

"…What?..."

"I have learned that wounds will heal, broken bones will mend…and with you…I've learned that any bond can be placed back together. The only thing…the only _infuriating_ thing that will never disappear…are these damn feelings I've had for you since we were children. And…the only thing I want to piece together is impossible now."

I gulped at the odd confession and wondered if I would ever be able to look at him the same way after this day.

"I just can't understand it…" he said tiredly. "I've brought Sasuke back, I've gotten stronger for you, for the village…in the hopes that one day you'd see me as more than just that annoying prankster you used to slap around…in hopes that you'd see me as a mature, successful, full grown man who would give his life for you."

"So is _this_ why you came here Naruto?" I asked, feeling as though I had done something terrible to a friend.

"N-no! I-I just wanted…wanted to-"

"The idiot kept wanting to just talk with you." Sasuke's cool voice was heard over my friend's endless stuttering.

Naruto nearly jumped from his seat as he frantically turned his body and head over several times in a desperate search for his brooding teammate. I heard the latter's cool voice utter a slightly amused grunt before stepping out from the unlit hallways.

"H-how long have you been there?" the blonde asked with a face that was absolutely livid and crimson.

His best friend shrugged and gracefully fell back into one of my couches as though he owned it. I was forced to look as Sasuke made himself at home by separating his legs in a masculine manner and heavily leaned his back against the soft cushion of the furniture. His slacking yet demanding and self-satisfied pose was consummated by one last gesture. He finished by resting the side of his face against a hand being propped up by his erect elbow on the arm of the couch. The Uchiha's posture held all the sensuality and commanding aura it needed to make even the most stoic woman melt.

I, however, merely huffed and crossed my arms at his uncouth intrusion.

"So how's the 'avenger'?" Naruto asked, trying to regain some of his dignity and composure while he still could. "You shouldn't sneak around people's houses you bastard!"

It seemed there was _never_ a dearth of nicknames that Naruto could create for any of his friends, Sasuke seemed to be his preferred choice whenever he thought up new names.

"Shut up loser."

"I'll have you know, this _loser_ is going to be inaugurated _hokage_!" he snapped back with a proud grin.

Sasuke's omnipotent eyes could only blink once as he grasped the news.

Naruto continued to smile.

His friend scoffed.

"_You_? Now it's obvious I should have done the village a favor and destroyed it when I had the chance." He derided with an arrogant smirk. "With you as Hokage the villagers are going to wish I _had_ wiped them out."

"Shut up you stupid bastard!"

And the friendly banter went on even after I got sick of them and left the room for my late dinner (or at this point it was probably breakfast.)

"You guys won't ever stop will you?" I scolded tiredly as I set down two extra ramen and tea cups by the living room table.

"_I_ will, once Sasuke stops being such an ass." Naruto responded as though he were innocent of any wrongdoing.

I rolled my eyes and restrained myself from acting like the mother controlling her bickering children. "So, not that I think breaking and entering is against the law or anything, but what brings you here Sasuke?" I asked, eager for a new topic.

He shrugged and reached for his tea with a long…toned arm.

I shuddered at the mention of the thought.

(After my experience with Lee, I had become more observant of the opposite sex.)

"I just wanted to see if Naruto's skills with a woman were worse than his shameful fighting style. Apparently they're equaled." He calmly replied, his dull façade merely hiding the urge to annoy his friend once more.

"Pretty cocky words for a social reject like _you_!" the blonde sneered back. "I don't blame you for not showing any interest in marriage though. I know that if _I_ had a clan that was as pathetic as yours I would want to let it die out too!"

A slight twitch formed in Sasuke's left eye as he lifted his cup and drank.

"How sad, projecting your own shortcomings on others are we?"

"I-I-" at this point Naruto was absolutely incensed as I watched small veins protrude from his temple. "You freaking BASTARD! I don't know why you're so bitter about it! If anything YOU were the one who told me to ask he-"

"I never said anything if you recall." The more serene of the two ninja interrupted something that I had hoped to hear.

"What were you guys talking about?" I asked as I peered at them askance.

It seemed both men had abruptly decided to call a truce and stay silent about the matter. Naruto grumbled something along the lines of "stupid…well you _did_…" while Sasuke remained seated unflustered by the complaints. There was nothing more I despised than when my team kept secrets away from me, but by this point it had grown into a horrible habit that was impossible to break. Unless I thrashed it out of them or threatened them with an _unkind_ visit to the hospital after one of their training sessions, my attempts to unveil the reason for the silence would be futile.

"Oh, you guys are jerks." I nagged.

"So Sakura…where have you been? There's no one to tend to the idiot's wounds as I beat him time and time again." Sasuke spoke when he realized the blonde would be sulking for quite some time.

"You liar! I beat you ALL THE TIME!" Naruto would not stay silent for long.

"Perhaps in being an idiot or eating ramen you beat me."

"AGH! YOU BASTARD!"

"I've been working." I said, ignoring the hyperactive sage's mini rampages.

"It seems this 'work' has kept you rather busy."

I gave out an irritated sigh as I scowled at Sasuke. Even after all these months, even after I thought we were on friendly terms again, even after it was _explicitly_ stated that I would never see him in any way other than a friend, he would always jump at the chance to bring up his malevolence toward Lee. At times, he was no better than Naruto when it came to trying to intimidate my boyfriend. They failed miserably, of course, since Lee could rival or even _beat_ Sasuke when it came to having an apathetic impression.

"Well, not that I'm kicking you guys out but…" I shook my head as I chose to rephrase my request. "You know what? Ju-just get out, both of you, and come visit during _normal_ hours like NORMAL people!"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The day had come.

Or rather, _days_.

As much as I had wanted to eschew the horrible fact, it had reared its head at me and forced me to realize it.

Lee had begun to take on missions with his team.

My master had thankfully started him out with easy missions befitting a genin, missions no higher than C rank.

My boyfriend had not been one to complain about the decision. He was just grateful the elders had allowed him this much freedom after what he had done.

Sex of course, was out of the question considering the jerk had sworn to refrain from it until I was ready to move in with him.

Abstinence aside, Lee had started to collect minute characteristics of his old self as time progressed. Genuine smiles that were once uncommon were now used whenever I visited him, and talks and quality time with Gai Sensei had begun to sprout again for the first time in what seemed an eternity. Over the course of months, quarrels became less frequent, and slowly we learned to face our difficulties with maturity and a calm state of mind before lashing out at each other (courtesy of the psychiatrist's endless nagging and scolding during our sessions.) The visits with him had also decreased in Lee's calendar. He would have stopped going to them all together if the old man had not recommended therapy for couples. The idea had seemed foreign at first, but again we slowly learned to deal with it since it meant we would understand each other as partners.

"How was your training with team seven?"

I sighed as I stirred some vegetables into a pan.

"Fine, how was the old man today?"

"He is in good health, but he was rather peeved that you were not there to join me." Lee replied as he bent his head over the couch to give me a dejected face. "And I missed you as well."

"Well, I promised Naruto and Sasuke that I would train with them at _least_ once a week. I can't just CANCEL. Do you know how long they would _stalk_ me in my house if I didn't go?"

"Well then, I suppose you should just live here then, it would take them a great deal of time just to find the place." He half joked with a wide smile.

I shook my head as I giggled at his persistent behavior and walked over to him.

"And what would happen once they _do_ find the apartment?" I asked, peering into his face.

"Then we will be far too busy to open the door." He replied sensually as he took advantage of our proximity and managed to pull my whole body over the couch.

I shivered from his contact as fingers grazed my knees and thighs before resting on my stomach. For a man who had never 'consummated' a relationship, he knew far too well how to muddle a woman in her emotions. While he kissed my cheeks and lips I could only wrap my arms around his neck as I rested on his lap like a child. To say this man had grown more affectionate over our time together would have been anything but exaggeration, but I couldn't help but grin like fool each time he caressed me on his own accord.

"I don't think I'd be comfortable living here though, Lee." I mumbled before his lips stopped me from talking.

"And why not? You know I have wanted you to stay with me since I got the apartment."

"But…won't it be…_awkward_?" I nearly squeaked the last part as he nipped at my neck.

It took all my will power not to smack him across the head.

"No, it will _not_ be awkward. I am sure we are mature enough for something such as this." He responded calmly as if to dispel my nerves. "Besides…we will have separate rooms until we are ready to share."

"Yeah…but…it's still a bit hard to picture- you and I living in the same place that is." I mumbled as I rested my head against his shoulder. "But I suppose I can't say it wouldn't make me happy…and I can't say I'm too young for it…and my parents are never home so I'm alone anyway."

The favorable reasons for living with him left my mouth without end, stopping only when Lee leaned in for another kiss.

"Well, we can be alone together." Lee joked. "I am used to living alone, but I have found that being with another is quite lovely."

"You mean Neji and Gai?"

He nodded as his fingers stroke my hair and played with random strands.

"Living in the Hyuga household…" he began with hesitancy, "…was at times uncomfortable…but I enjoyed Neji's company. It was the same with Gai."

"What did you guys do on a regular day?" I asked, somewhat inquisitive over imagining those two men living _normally_.

"We trained…I remember I went to a lake with Neji once. We fought and he ended up pushing me into the water." He recalled with a chuckle. "And Gai…it was like having a new father."

"How often did you two fight?" I questioned sleepily as I fought heavy eyelids.

"Well, it is easier to tell you which days we did NOT fight." He answered. "Gai would always be telling to take the horrid medication while Neji would always pry into the relationship between my father and me."

"But that's because they cared for you enough to get you help." I pointed out, massaging the space between his pectorals.

Lee held back a laugh at the tickling sensation and pulled my hand away from him.

"Stop…you are quite impulsive today." He teased as he kissed said hand. "I think you are beginning to act more like Tenten each day."

"No," I assured as I remember the last time I saw her. "She's VERY different than me. For one thing, she has…odd taste in men."

"What is the matter with them?"

His question was voiced quickly, almost as though he was fearful of something.

"They're weird, let's just say that." I said, eager not to get into the subject.

"Do you think _Neji_ is weird?"

The odd question left me dazed and wondering what was going on in that mind of his.

"She doesn't like Neji." I rectified their relationship. "She told me so herself."

"I never implied anything about her liking him. I was simply asking for your opinion."

"Well…he's not exactly what one would call _normal_." I pondered. "What brought him up?"

"It is nothing. I have just been talking to him a great deal now that we are back to doing missions together." He muttered.

"What do you guys usually talk about?"

The man shrugged, leaning his head against the couch's cushions.

"It varies. He was become a bit more open with me as well….he told me something of great…importance."

I lifted my head up to him in slight alarm as I waited for him to finish. "Wh…what did he tell you?"

"He has arranged it so that we will complete our last failed mission." He stated confidently.

"What?" I asked, puzzled over this drastic change of subject.

"He told me he had been gathering information about the person who ambushed us."

"You mean your father." I stated flatly, already knowing where this conversation was headed.

"I need to do this Sakura." He pleaded.

"Why?" I snapped back before realizing I needed to calm myself down if I didn't want to start fighting.

Taking a prolonged breath, I slowly pushed myself away from his embrace and sat next to him.

"So, that's it? You're just after revenge then?" I asked evenly.

"No. I merely want to bring him back to the village to make him atone for ever leaving it."

His reasons were trivial to me now. The mere _thought_ of him leaving for something as detrimental as capturing his abusive father whitened my knuckles as I held on to his shirt.

"Lee…look at what happened last time. What makes you so sure Tsunade will allow your team to go after him again?"

"I know because no one in my team ever leaked the information of the _identity_ of the ninja who ambushed us." He replied with an unwavering voice. "If we only explain to Lady Tsunade…I am positive she will understand."

I bit my lip.

"But still…how do you know the information Neji has is reliable?"

At this Lee gave me a dead stare.

"It is _Neji_ we are talking about Sakura. He has completed more ANBU missions than I have. Besides, those were important scrolls with medical records encoded in them, do you _really_ believe Lady Tsunade will ignore our information and not allow us to go?" he asked as he continued to pile up reasons to persuade me.

"Why…" I cleared my throat and rubbed my temple with both my palms. "Why wouldn't your teammates…why wouldn't GAI give a full mission report on this? You do realize what can happen if you withdraw information?"

Again Lee awarded me with a reluctant shrug, opting to rub my back instead. I relaxed against his touch and smiled in contentment as his hand created small soothing circles on my skin.

"I do not know. Perhaps it is just some sick bond we have…"

"Bond?" I asked, my thoughts automatically taking me to Naruto and Sasuke.

Lee grabbed hold of one of his black couch pillows, pressing it against his stomach as I did whenever my stomach hurt. A somewhat depressed smile stretched across his features as he tightened his grip around it.

"They somehow know how I feel…I suppose they knew Lady Tsunade would probably suspend my shinobi privileges if she ever knew what I did." He admitted. "But I never expected ALL of them to keep the fact that I had attacked them a secret."

I listened quietly, nodding my head and absorbing this information before I judged him.

"I guess…I'm just…I'm just afraid that you won't come back Lee." I blurted out.

"Sakura please…just trust me. Last time we were hurt was because I carelessly rushed in without heeding Gai's warning. This time…it will be different if I ever cross paths with him."

"Are they _that_ willing to help you capture your father?" I asked as I pondered whether I knew Tenten at all as a friend for her to keep such a horrid secret.

"You do not understand Sakura…my team…it is nothing like yours. Each and every team is different. We put our differences aside and fight as one…we help each other, mutually and unconditionally support each other, feed off each other's motivation…and last time…I did not do it. That is why I ended up hurting them." He tried to explain as he placed the pillow aside and rested his head back once more.

"Well…I could probably never understand…considering Tenten was strong to begin with and wasn't a hindrance to your team. Not to mention she didn't worship her year's top rookie." I added as a joke. "But…if you leave…I'm afraid that I won't see you again."

"Sakura, I will be fine-"

"I love you far too much to simply let you GO like that."

I felt his firm lips press against my own, but it was anything but a kiss. It was mere contact, dry, lacking in passion. It wasn't until I heard Lee's laughter fill the room that I finally began to relax.

"Sakura, you really worry far too much!" he scolded with a smile. "Do you still think that I will callously abandon you? Do you seriously believe I would leave such a smart, caring, gorgeous woman in the hands of Naruto or Sasuke for long? I will not take any unnecessary risks. I will be fine!" he continued to assure me.

"I…I-I…I-" the sound of my voice quivered with each syllable I tried to pronounce. "I will move in with you if you come back. I know I'll be ready by then."

Again, my mouth blurted what my mind would never even dare THINK.

Lee's face brightened at my bargain as he threw himself in my chest. Any woman would have thought he was doing this action for lecherous reasons, but I knew better. The idiot was just ecstatic. He exclaimed several inaudible gratifying words at me as he clutched on for dear life.

"When is this mission?" I asked uneasily, trying to find oxygen as my ribcage was squeezed.

"We are planning to request permission to pursuit in about a week! That will be _six_ months since I have started completing missions." He replied happily.

The nauseous sensation in my stomach would not disappear, had it really been six months since I had seen him off for his first mission?

"And Sakura…if anything…although I do not think anything will occur…but if anything bad _does_ happen..."

"But nothing will, right?" I asked to silence him, wanting to be reassured endlessly and not face some horrible possibility.

"No, we will retrieve the scroll, capture the one responsible, then hold him for questioning back at the village."

I nodded, going over the idea and getting used to the horror of being without Lee eventually.

"Sakura, how can I NOT come back? You will move in with me!" he exclaimed. "If anything _does_ happen, you will be the first to know and the first to back me up!"

"But…won't they find out it's your father anyway? Is capturing him really worth risking the lives of your teammates?" I asked, completely ignoring his assurances as I ran my fingers through his hair in a soothing manner.

"I have already talked about this with them…they will not let me go alone." He mumbled rather guiltily. "Besides, I plan to merely capture my father…not kill him."

His last words were spoken with what I thought was hesitancy.

I shrugged it off.

He wasn't that type of person.

Not like Sasuke.

Not like Naruto.

He was him.

And yet…

"Your father…who exactly was he?" I asked before I realized what an idiot I was for ever mentioning his past.

Lee gave no signs of any negative effect, not even a twitch which had once been instinctive whenever his father came up in our conversations. Arms gathered me close to him, pulling me until my ear was next to his heartbeat. The calm rhythmic pulsing was enough to show me it no longer bothered him to speak about the matter.

"He used to be in the Konoha Medical Corps, as you are now. There probably is no record of him ever working or even existing there since he made sure to cover his tracks before he left." He answered without skipping a beat.

"How…how old were you when he left?" I continued to question him despite my inward warnings.

He shrugged, his reaction completely stoic at the memory.

"Six? Seven? Six perhaps? I do not remember that well."

"What did you do once he was gone?" The questions saturated my mouth, never allowing me a moment of prudency to think about what I was saying. It seemed like I had stopped caring, considering they continued to slip without the slightest regard to his mental wellbeing.

I kept at it.

'_Stubborn, stubborn, rude…god I hate myself.' _

"I do not recall. I suppose I cleaned myself." He stated.

"C-clean…your…yourself?" I asked rather shakily.

Lee nodded and took a breath that only seemed to prolong my anxiety and curiosity.

"He…he took me out of my room and dragged me into the woods before he left…" he stopped and glanced at me, somewhat looking at me for approval or encouragement to talk more.

"I-it's all right…you don't have to talk about it if you don't want to." I comforted him.

If there was _anything_ the therapy sessions had taught me it was to never rush or force a partner into something.

It was usually what began our fights in the past.

"It is fine with me…" he whispered into my ear, "is it fine with you?"

My body grew limp at the deep courteous voice. How such an awkward…gaunt…and bizarre boy could change into this wonderful and masculine figure holding me was a mystery to me.

"Of course it's fine Lee, I _want_ to know." I said in puzzlement, giving his hand a slight squeeze.

Lee opened his mouth, bracing himself to probably say something he had not admitted to anyone besides his mentor and therapist. I held on to his hand, pressing firmly to support him any way I could. His lips parted once more as he began to speak.

"I was…at first I was happy when he woke me up. I was half asleep, but I remember being so happy thinking it was finally my turn to go on a mission with him. He had always…abused me, but I honestly thought no human that close to me would try to…"

I felt his muscles grow tense under me…chest, stomach, shoulders, arms; all grew stiff at the recollection of memories.

"He took me into the woods and…I do not even remember if it hurt or not. He began to punch me until I fell to the ground…then he started to kick me. It seemed odd and terrifying to me since he usually stopped after I began to scream." He bit the side of his lip and took another breath, leisurely stretching his arms to relieve the stress. "I guess he had no intention of stopping that night."

I could think of nothing to say in response. As my sensei had once said to me over a decade ago…

Sometimes words only made a situation worse.

"I suppose Father beat me until his body grew tired…or until he thought I was finally _dead_. I did not care to remember since I began to choke on my own blood when one of his last forceful kicks landed on my nose." He muttered bitterly at the memory. "I…I lost consciousness."

His voice was steady and confident, it no longer held that faltering characteristic I heard whenever he talked of his past. The tone was of a changed man ready to face each of his issues head on. I could only nod my head and try to ignore something resembling balled up barbwire lodged in my throat. Crying was no longer something I could do even if I wanted. It would not help Lee in any way if I began to sob like some pitiful girl. The only thing available to me was to comfort him and support him rather than being the one soothed.

"But I was happy…" his abrupt confession nearly made the lump disappear. "Even as arms carried my moribund body away, even as I woke in a hospital bed days later, I was…happy knowing I would not be hurt like that again." He admitted, kissing me softly between my eyes when he noticed how much I was struggling to push back tears. "Why do you look like you are about to weep?" was the added question that held a somewhat humorous intent.

"Wh-who…who was it? Gai Sensei?" I asked, curious about the identity of his rescuer.

Lee's face brightened at the mention of his father figure.

"Even now I doubt he has forgiven himself for not being there that night." He mumbled as he gave me one last passing smile before returning my head to his chest where it belonged.

"…Oh…"

We were left in silence for a few minutes, his arms making the only sound as he laid his back on the couch and pulled me to rest my body on top of him. Feeling the warmth from his body and hearing that strong heart beat of his while I rested my head against him nearly lulled me to sleep as time dragged on.

"I still consider myself fortunate…" he pointed out rather contradictorily, "I was lucky enough to find another father who loved me for who I was, friends who accepted me and all my flaws, and…a woman who still loved me despite everything that has happened to her."

I smiled against his chest, letting my hand rub over his heart.

"I can't wait until I move in with you."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The week had passed.

The request had been made.

The permission…surprisingly granted.

I heaved a deep sigh as I carried two enormous cardboard boxes into my 'room'. My parents had not been too thrilled, but were eventually contented somehow after Lee had "talked" to them. (What he had said I did not EVER wish to know.) Tenten had been ecstatic, his Sensei proud, Neji skeptical, my teammates…slightly peeved. Public opinions aside, I had quickly set myself to work the day Lee had left for his mission. My father had been kind enough to help me move the bed to my new home, but I would be on my own when it came to packing my clothes.

The mere _idea_ of living with someone other than my own family still seemed abnormal to me, but Lee had assured me that I would not regret my decision. It was at least better than getting married, (although my mother had zealously proposed the option.) There was no way in hell I would comply with that request. I did not wish for commitment, not so much so soon. What I wanted…what _both_ Lee and I wanted was a chance to get to know our housing habits. Only then would we know if a marriage would work.

I shuddered at the possibility of marriage, but knew this was only the first step. We had plenty of time and were in no hurry to make hasty decisions.

Shoving the last of the boxes into the living room, I proceeded to hook up "must have" kitchen appliances and food in the kitchen: a microwave and mini oven, as well as ramen and chips. I marked my territory in a lone cabinet with the food, trying to jam several packets of cookies and pocky into the crammed space. I grinned proudly at my collection, knowing I would fatten Lee up in no time, (not that there was anything wrong with that stomach of his.)

"I wonder…" I seemed to say to no one in particular.

A smile from my lecherous thoughts stretched my lips.

My mind reveled at the possibilities once he got home.

Would he be happy?

Relieved?

Depressed?

What would he say once I surprised him with all my stuff neatly placed in our apartment?

Should I meet him by the gates or wait sleeping on his bed like a present?

Again, my mind was overrun with more endless options at the possibility of greeting him sleeping on his bed _with_ sexy lingerie.

'_I wonder how long it will be before we…?' _a blush stained my face as I opened a box of cereal.

I could not even finish my thought as I imagined waking up with him.

Although at this point, I knew I wouldn't be able to control myself, not when Lee would be taking a shower or changing clothes each day I lived with him.

If anything, _I_ would be the first one to break our agreement and surprise him in the middle of the night.

I doubted he would oppose me if I did anything, surely _now_ he would allow our relationship to progress?

I looked out the lone window in my new room and wondered where Lee was.

Wondered if he missed me.

If he was thinking of me.

If he was even _alive_.

I sighed and pushed the last of my boxes away from my view.

Missions were usually completed in a minimum of two weeks or a maximum of two months, depending on my master's wishes. I didn't know what time limit she had given Team Gai.

All I knew was…

These would be the longest weeks of my life.


	28. Agonizing Candor

Hello alo! And yes, it is I! No I am not dead, no I could never forget this story, and YES I will finish it even if it takes me ten years! (I doubt it will though.) I apologize a thousand times for this horribly late update! No words can describe how lazy and sorry I am. I hope all of you are well in this weird road we call life. I know it has taken _me_ to odd places! For one, I went to my first convention in a place called San Diego this summer. San Diego Comic Con proved to be a never-ending source of inspiration for a great chunk of this chapter, so I look forward to going to more during the year. I took a crazy amount of pictures and I even cosplayed for the first time and received very kind reviews from conventioneers (including a photograph session with a Comic Con magazine that liked the costume)! A prize will go to the one who guesses my character, or if you simply want to check out the pictures, I'll give you my facebook! Well, anyway, I thank you for your kind motivation and helpful messages! And so, without further hesitation, Read, Review, and Recommend! (And no, this is not the last chapter.)

**Agonizing Candor**

"So this is it…hn…I thought it'd be more spacious."

"Well, if Sakura likes it, _I_ like it too!"

"The window provides picturesque scenery outside."

I scowled at the three men currently crowding by the new apartment's door, leaning their heads inside the living room as far as their necks could take them without spraining any ligaments. A mélange of black and blue eyes ravished the furniture and paintings I had bought to decorate the room, stopping shortly before scrutinizing the material of the floor and walls. (I prayed my mother would not act like this and be impudent enough to ask how Lee was financially capable of renting such a costly place.) It was a sight verging on the comical since they looked more like snooty next door housewives rather than stealthy ninjas as they careened their bodies over each other, just _barely_ trying to steal a glimpse at my living quarters before I slammed the door in their face.

"Would you like to come inside?" I offered loudly as I laid my arms akimbo in exasperation.

"No."

"Love to!"

"…Sure…if everyone else is doing it."

I rolled my eyes at my teammates and motioned for them to enter before I regretted my decision. (Having Sasuke, Naruto, _and_ Sai together in the same room never _was_ a sensible idea.) Naruto made an example for the other two men to follow and lounged himself on the longest couch. Sai, ever the human blank slate, mimicked Naruto's movement and jumped on the soft furniture as well. I cringed as I heard the screeching of the couch's legs against the floor, the shaking thing was trying its best to support the sudden weight of both men as they assaulted it.

I pinched the bridge of my nose as I tried to warn off an imminent migraine.

"How long have you been staying here?" Sasuke's aloof voice asked from behind me while he gracefully plummeted down on a nearby chair.

The way his uninterested words left his stern lips made it seem as though the aspect of sharing an apartment with Lee was ridiculous. It was odd how sensing the emotions behind his stoic questions had become a facile task.

"I have been staying here for exactly one month." I stated rather cockily.

"I'm surprised Sakura! I kind of figured you wouldn't be able to keep the place tidy or something!" Naruto's idiotic comment did not escape my evanescent ears.

I gifted him with a ferocious look that threatened to disembowel him if he didn't shut his mouth. This menace I enforced as I gave his foot a chakra fueled stomp with my own.

"I'm not like YOU, who has roaches crawling around and week old ramen cups stacked against the walls!" I exclaimed accusingly as I fought the urge to sling Naruto _and_ the couch out my window.

Of course, it only took me mere _seconds_ to remind myself how _expensive_ the couch was and that poor innocent _helpless_ Sai still resided in it.

"I was JOKING Sakura!" the blonde reasoned as he frantically shook both his arms in front of me in a vain attempt to protect himself. (The fool, no stranger to my master's antics, had probably already read my brutal thoughts.)

"Then stop PROVOKING me you IDIOT!" I barked back, my temper a bit more sensitive than usual.

It was not my fault, really it wasn't. The fact that Lee had gone past the mission ending date had nothing to do with my irritated state. The fact that I had to sleep alone with no one in the next room had not left me distraught and anxious for news from him. The fact that I was absolutely _horrified_ of what had become of him had nothing to do with redirecting my frustration at my teammate (albeit he _did_ deserve it.)

"He has yet to come back." Sasuke commented as a non sequitur accompaniment to my insult.

"That is true. Do you think maybe he's de-" Sai, known throughout the village for his sensitivity and compassion toward a lovelorn girl, was quickly silence with a hand over his pale lips as Naruto nearly pounced on him.

"_Idiot_!" I heard Naruto hiss under his breath.

The Uchiha merely blinked, unfazed and unaffected by the certain crushed look on my face at even the _mention_ of my boyfriend's demise.

"At any case, how long do you intend on staying here?"

I was shaken by the toneless question, by the impudence of it all.

"I-…it's not a temporary thing Sasuke." I responded briskly, my voice stiff with hostility.

My broody teammate acted as though he had not sensed my peeved reaction at all and began to look out the living room's window, his mind long gone into some unknown thought.

"Sasuke how about a little optimism? Just because _you_ live alone _miles_ away from the heart of the village doesn't mean you have to bitter it up for _other _people!" Naruto accused as he sent a well executed glare in the Uchiha's direction.

"I can't live anywhere else, it's the farthest place I can think of where I can no longer hear your annoying voice." He responded dully while not even bothering to make eye contact with his best friend.

The blonde crossed his arms and leaned against the couch, unfazed by the rude answer and looking rather comfortable in his surroundings.

"It's amazing that I have the authority to exile you from the village if I wanted to just by you saying things like that." He replied smugly. "Keep in mind you're insulting a _hokage_ now Sasuke!"

"It doesn't matter _what_ pitiful title you give yourself, you'll always be a dead last loser to me." He retorted with his usual smirk.

An eyebrow twitched on Naruto's part. "Well, you can take your insults and shove them up your-"

"So Sakura, when are you expecting Lee?" Sai astutely broke the tension filled comebacks and low remarks with an innocent question. "I read in a book you should always try to break up fights with a completely random question that no one cares about!" he seemed to chirp.

The idiot.

This sufficed to provide the interested gazes of both my teammates as they looked at me for an answer.

"Well…" I mumbled, suddenly feeling three pairs of eyes on me to be quite discomfiting. "_You_ guys should know. Missions usually take anywhere to two weeks or two months…right?"

I received three different nods to answer my question.

"A-and anyway…Lady Tsunade personally told me she would keep me up to date with their progress. I-it's just retrieving a scroll after all." I muttered, trying to keep their prying looks away from the topic.

"That's an unusually long time to retreat a simple scroll." Sasuke stated offhandedly as he got off his chair. "I've wasted enough time here. I'm going to go train."

"God knows you need it after how much I kicked your ass last time." Naruto deemed it necessary to sneer at him.

His best friend (although one could never tell if they were on amicable terms) simply looked at him with an upmost apathetic expression. "If I recall, it was _you_ who was whining for a break when you were losing."

The palest of my teammates opened his mouth and courteously raised an index finger to speak.

"You're wrong…or I _think_ you are, at least. I am pretty sure I ended up spraying your eyes with my ink…so I beat you by default?" Sai mentioned coyly from his seat.

"The fight had been over by then." Sasuke automatically corrected in a rather snappy tone.

"Oh…then you were caught off guard?"

It seemed the self proclaimed artist liked to test his counterpart's temper.

(He was the only one besides Naruto foolish enough to do so.)

"Naruto, are you coming?" my teammate completely brushed off Sai's question and impatiently waited on his friend to accompany him to the training grounds.

Blue orbs shifted to Sasuke, and then oscillated between me, looking somewhat agitated and uncertain.

"Uh, you go on ahead Sasuke, you too Sai. I'll catch up in a bit."

"Suit yourself."

"But I'm not leaving yet-"

"I will see you at the training grounds _Sai_." Naruto seethed, making it a rather obvious attempt to receive privacy.

"What's up with the moron? He's acting more idiotic than usual." Sasuke muttered before heading out the door with a dismissing nod in my direction.

"I think he still is insulted that Konohamaru used me instead of him on the jutsu he did on Saku-" Poor Sai failed to end his thought as he found himself doubled over in pain after I flung my fist against his stomach in one internal injury inducing punch.

I was sure this would be the last time I heard of that infernal boy-on-boy jutsu of Naruto's clone-like figure.

Sasuke, (thankfully immune to the memory of the horrid day) merely sighed in disgust and left us. Sai, after having received an ominous glare from me, quickly followed suit with both hands clutching his belly. Naruto's face ventured through a medley of emotions throughout the whole performance in my living room. Expressions that started with a livid reddening of the cheeks to an utterly wordless shock followed his replacement teammate as he made a frantic dash to the door. True enough, he had often been caught badgering Konohamaru on the reason to his preferred people in the jutsu. Never one to question his sexuality, he had almost disowned his young rival from the "sick" trick.

(I still inwardly held my ground that it was the best jutsu ever invented by man.)

I sighed, slightly peeved from the grown men's' juvenile behavior.

"So you're _still _not over it?" Sai's head popped out through my open door to ask the very question we would probably never know the answer to.

Said blonde pressed his lips together in frustration, eyes closing as his chest slowly rose and deflated while taking a prolonged breath.

"Sai, can I please talk to Sakura in _private_?"

"Sure, a friend always complies with a favor, I read it-"

"In a book, I know." He responded tiredly.

"So...you're _not _over it?"

Using a force that hardly seemed necessary, Naruto walked towards the door, took hold of Sai's shirt, and nearly threw him out the door as the ninja's feet tried ardently to keep up with the idiot's.

The whole scene would have seem comical had it not been so riveting.

In a matter of moments and after a few hushed whispers spoken through gritted teeth outside the hallways that consisted of, "I'll catch up with you later Sasuke…just got to talk…back off!" Naruto was back in the room with a flushed face that told me nothing of what was going on outside my apartment.

"So…Sakura…h-how…how have you been?" he asked as he sat back down on the couch.

"Well, fine." I stated rather bluntly.

What else _could_ I tell him? I could not stomach to tell him that I had been utterly desolate and miserable since Lee's departure. I could not tell him I had missed his embrace. I could not tell him I had missed his legs playfully brushing against mine as we rested on the very couch Naruto was sitting on. And I _certainly_ could not tell him how I pined for his lips to gently trail against my neck and tickle me behind my ears. These were things I had to long for by myself lest I risked receiving a look of disdain from my teammate.

"Sakura." He said with an even tone as his head leaned forward to rest on his upright hands propped by his legs. "Tell me the truth. How have you been…since Lee's been gone-I mean."

"I keep telling you that I've been _fine_ Naruto." I assured tiredly while rubbing my temples with both my index fingers.

Naruto's lips once again pressed firmly against one another, distrust evident in his features. He sighed and slipped back into the comfort of the plump couch. The signs of a sleep deprived individual were apparent on his body as he ran his fingers through his hair in a manner that reminded me of Lee. Skin under his eyes that once was a creamy vibrant color now seemed so black that I swore he had painted them on with make up. Risking his life was probably nothing compared to the sleepless nights he had endured trying to read important information alongside the current Hokage. This was a price I doubt Naruto was ready to pay, considering his love for sleep.

"You're lying…I can tell. Damn it! Why are you like this?"

"Like what? _You're _the one who is assuming how I feel. I'm perfectly fine waiting for him, because I KNOW he'll come." I said calmly.

"Sakura- I!…" As if not having the energy required for a rant, Naruto immediately slumped back down to the comfort of the couch. "I…I know Lee will come back…he's super strong and brave…but…" the man who would become Hokage in a matter of _weeks_ slightly bit his lower lip, apparently trying to voice his jumbled thoughts. "I will always be here for you. Other men can abandon you and take you for granted but I-"

"Lee won't abandon me and he _never_ takes me for granted." I snapped rather quickly.

"I didn't mean specifically _him_…" he corrected himself, "…all I want to say is that…my request from last time…I still mean every word."

"I still mean my answer as well Naruto." Was my muttered reply.

"Time may change that answer Sakura…who's to say?"

A smidgen of hope laced his words.

Was it wrong to test my patience?

"Time won't change it, no matter how much of it goes by."

"Yeah, but Sakura-"

I had enough.

Enough.

"Naruto, ENOUGH. I am in _love_ with him! It doesn't matter how many years go by, I will _never_ love you the way I love him!"

My hand instinctively went across my mouth once I realized how malicious and untrue my words had sounded.

At that moment, I had expected him to be completely infuriated, to start shooting his mouth off erratically like he usually did, to start wailing his arms about as if intoxicated, to at _least_ crack a horrible joke. He had grown up and matured more than I bothered to give him credit for when he did none of what I expected. No, he did not even give me a cool stare, one that would make me give him a ferocious witty comeback…instead the fool had the gall to make the face of a child who had just be reprimanded. Blue eyes plummeted to the floor, his body in the midst of frisson and his lips beginning to waver. I felt useless while I waited for an inane response, the stupid kind he habitually gave me whenever I was trying to make a point.

"You're right…I'm sorry. I have no right to…no right." He mumbled.

"Naruto…" I began nervously, my fingers knotting themselves into one another, "you are…my very dear, best friend…you have been there for me more times than Lee or Sasuke…you have given me hope when all I found was despair, you gave me a smile when all I wanted to do was cry. I…I love you very much…just _not_ like that."

My teammate broke his sulking state with an unexpected grin, one that seemed to erase the delicate moment between us. It was in times like these that reminded me of what kind of a person he had grown up to be. Naruto was an enigma. He was a genius, an idiot, he was as handsome physically as he was repulsive in his mannerisms, and he was my savior from many troubles, a sanctuary I could always run to when life became excessively harsh for me to bear. The man was an ambivalence of everything I ridiculed and everything I adored.

Naruto would always be Naruto.

That's all I could ever love.

"I understand Sakura."

"I-"

"That reminds me…grandma's waiting for you in her office, I'd go now before she decides to fling her furniture out the window like usual." He added casually as he jumped off the corpulent couch.

"I…what?" I muttered. "Did something happen?"

The man shrugged and helped me up. "All I know is that she sent for you as she was reading a letter."

My mind immediately went to Lee's whereabouts.

"Sakura? Sakura, listen to me." His rare cool voice pulled me out of the numerous worst case scenarios that fabricated in my thoughts.

"What?" I asked, my feet already responding to my mental state and moving towards the door.

"Tell Tsunade that I'm willing to go with you."

"You don't have to do anything." I assured as I glanced back at Naruto's confident stare.

"Like _hell_ I don't!" he exclaimed with a comforting smile. "I brought you back a kicking and screaming Sasuke, didn't I? Now I'll bring you back a kicking and screaming Lee if it kills me."

I blinked in return, not quite understanding the logic behind his selfless actions.

"Th-thank you Naruto."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

"Their last status report we received was sent from _this_ part of the area," my ill-tempered master said sternly as she violently whacked the area on a map with her cane, "Even by horse, the distance _anyone_ can wisely cover in those snow storms this time of year is a few miles at best. Be sure to scan the whole forest thoroughly with an alternative other than your own body to avoid wasting time and energy." She recommended. "So my order would be to take someone who can provide you with the chakra skills necessary to cover a vast amount of ground while exerting little or none of his or her own physical energy."

I fought to keep from rolling my eyes from her precise and damn well near unattainable requests. It seemed my master enjoyed scrutinizing every detail of a mission when it concerned her "prized pupil". Despite my hasty mood, I patiently and courteously listened to any other astute recommendations the robust woman gave me. My face nodded when necessary, my hands remained stationary by my sides, while my feet _stupidly_ began to tap their toes as if to hurry Lady Tsunade.

Being far too much of an observant woman, she cocked an eyebrow and stopped midsentence. "Am I… _boring_ you Sakura?"

Her voice was like a shard of ice being penetrated into my skin. How Naruto fearlessly tested her temper on a regular basis was enough to give him the title of Hokage if all one needed was courage.

"No..my Lady." I mumbled, glaring at my feet for behaving impetuously.

"Well…good. Anyway, you are assigned to work with whomever you wish so long as they fit my description of desired abilities. Keep in mind this is a stealth search and rescue mission, NOT a head on collision with the enemy." She reminded before clearing her throat and beginning to read whatever mountain of paperwork that was in front of her.

I stood motionless in front of her, like the attentive obedient student I was known to be. After looking to see if I was still there, she finally waved her hand as if to dismiss me.

"Thank you Master Tsunade." I said with a short bow. "I'll bring back my comrades."

"Just make sure you bring _yourself_ back." She grumbled. "Can't afford to lose a decent kunoichi like you."

"Don't worry about me." I said with a smile as I made my way out the door.

My foot had not so much as taken an _inch_ out her office when my master cleared her throat again.

"Oh and Sakura?"

"Yes?" I inwardly cringed at whatever warning she would say next.

"By a 'stealth search and rescue' I don't mean a herd of blond haired idiot clones screaming their teammates' names as they run recklessly across the mountains."

"I understand." I concurred with a laugh.

Inside though, all I really wanted to do was cuss. Grumbling, whining, and tired from my mentor's briefings, I was glad once I was free to go. My exit from my master's office, of course, never came, seeing as how a pale skinned boy blocked my path.

"Oh look Sakura, how convenient." My master said with a sly smirk as she viciously stamped a block of paper with a red seal of approval.

I swore she planned these things.

"Did you call for me Lady Hokage?" Sai asked politely as he greeted her with a short bow.

"Why, yes, I did. I was going to give you a mission, but seeing as how I can get _anyone _to pick strawberries with the feudal lord's five year old son, why don't you go with Sakura?"

"What? _NO_!" I protested rather loudly and immediately.

The last mission I had been assigned to with Sai had left me destitute, wearing a kimono without a bra, and having to outrun ten rampant ex convicts who _apparently_ had no male sex organ according to the idiot. What had started as a simple undercover mission had turned into a public fiasco that was known by all in that tiny town where we had been sent.

I did not want that again.

I rubbed my temples for what seemed like the tenth time today.

Oh, I did not want that at _all_.

"What is our mission my Lady?" Sai asked, ever the obedient tabula rasa.

"_My_ mission," I corrected icily, "is to find Gai's team and bring them back. It seems they just got lost in the snowstorms where they are and probably need supplies."

The last part of my sentence was more of a comforting possibility for me rather than a plausible reason for the team to be missing.

Sai's face gave me no glimmer of what went through his mind, not even a blink of the eyes showed me an inkling of what to expect.

It was just as well.

"Anyway, Lady Tsunade, if you don't mind, I will be more than happy to assign Shino or-"

"Sakura, take me."

I turned to gawk with wide eyes at him, my mind _anywhere_ but an untarnished place. Apparently, the constant ruminating of Lee's appetizing body (mainly his strong jaw line, biceps, chest, abs, and otherwise anything sexually appealing) along with my current obsession thinking about sex, oral sex, and _having _sex with Lee within my sex deprived life, was enough make me incredibly susceptible to any sexual innuendos. I mentally smacked myself in admonition. If anything relating to sex, or even the _word_ "sex" crossed my mind again I was afraid I was going to have to admit I was on par with my Sensei or (god forbid) Naruto's former teacher.

"_Use_ me." He reworded his plea innocently, merely exacerbating the matter.

I felt the faint tickling of blood trickling down my nose before Sai gave me what I assumed was a disappointed frown.

"Take me _with_ you." He cleared his request. "I don't want to have intercourse with an ugly dog like _you_."

This would be the day my master finally learned I was a closet pervert.

I pretended to choke on some imagined particle of dust as I changed the subject. (Sai would have hell to pay later for that comment.)

"No, why should I? There are lots of highly skilled shinobi who are free to accompany me." I challenged his capabilities with a smirk.

Sai said nothing, merely pulled out a scroll and ink bottle he carried with him at all times and looked at me with a stare that, again, demonstrated nothing but his insipidness.

"You forget that I can draw things infused with my chakra. How do you think I found Sasuke so quickly in that lair all those years ago?" he questioned my decision with a bland face that showed no smugness of victory but surely hid it.

I rubbed the back of my head tiredly, my patience wearing thin from the petty debate.

"…Fine…but you better find them!" I said in a voice that nearly threatened.

The man only gave me his usual cheery smile in return.

'_Bastard_.'

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The alpine tundra was ruthless against our poorly protected skin.

Its vicious icy winds pierced our chests like knives as we took our pitiful steps and braced the numbing weather. Sai walked tacitly behind me, his eyes disappearing as he shut them tightly to keep from drying them with the relentless wind. His lips were so pursed together they disappeared inside his mouth. I could say nothing as I wrapped my cloak around my quivering form. A thermometer I astutely packed in my kunai pouch informed it was exactly 36 degrees Fahrenheit. I stifled a scoff as I stared contemptuously at the mercury incased in the tube. The treeless biome spared nothing save for the rare shrub and elk, humans were ill adapt to survive these conditions.

"You'd….think…it'd be warmer…since…it's…summer mmh?" I asked with shivers possessing every pause I took.

Sai, for once, said nothing insulting in response to my conviviality. He only nodded and pointed to a hill littered with boulders.

"There…might…be a..cave. Shelter." He uttered through clenched teeth.

"We…must keep…looking!" I screamed back, although my voice came out as a mere whisper as the howling air greedily engulfed it.

He shook his head languidly from the ferocity of the wind currently forming pieces of ice in our hair. With a reluctant hand he made a grab for my arm and coerced me into following him into the safety of the jagged rocks that would soon be our camp. A few puerile protests, several incensed yells, and numerous curse words later, I found my rear collapsing on a mound of dead moss inside a cave. There was no point in debating with someone who had been molded into thinking objectively and logically. Sai's shivering form was my only way of knowing he was under the same environmental stress I was experiencing.

"We are fortunate my ink has not frozen." He stated rather needlessly as he swiftly pulled out a scroll and brush. Giving me one final banal glance, he set his weapon of choice on the floor and uncapped a jar of ink.

"Now what?" was my impatient question as I sat, huddled lest more body warmth was stolen from me.

"Now…we allow for someone else to do the work for us." He responded calmly as he began to draw several mice with an alacrity only an expert could possess. As if judging his work, the half covered man thought it wise to add a few ravens to his art.

I shivered merely by looking at his exposed belly. How any idiot could possibly be lax enough to wear his garb in this place was probably not astute enough to be called a shinobi.

"How do you know your plan will work?" I asked, my mind already settling for the worse scenario. "For all we know they could be dead."

"Patience." He mumbled as he tucked in all but his index and middle fingers as he focused his chakra. Several black mice rose from the paper, scuttling about as though alive, while the ravens began to flap and stretch their newly drawn wings. Enabled with an almost innate capacity to know their creator's wishes, they scattered before us and hurriedly exited the dank cave, searching for their target.

"Hopefully they should not be too hard to find." He added evenly as he sat cross legged against a rock.

"What makes you so sure?" I was once again reluctant of his abilities despite the fact that I had seen firsthand what they could do.

"Tenten has something of mine. My ink creations will first search for it." He responded as though it were an obvious piece of information.

I felt the tips of my eyes begin to close as I looked at him askance. "And what exactly..is this "something"?" I asked rather defensively.

"Ink incased in a glass tube." Was his terse and rather speedy reply.

If I was not already aware of Sai being a socially inept, emotionally stunted individual, I would have assumed the prompt answer was for a reason. My teammate shifted legs uncomfortably as he felt my stare and quickly whipped out his sketchbook he usually took on missions to kill time (or to avoid talking).

"Whoa, wait-wait, _ink_ _incased_ in a glass _tube_?" I repeated bewilderedly. "What….what was the point of _that_?"

I had not meant to sound as though I was teasing him, but the opportunity seldom presented itself. It was usually him calling me an ugly dog in front of an attractive male or questioning the existence of Naruto's sex organ, but there was rarely anything we could _truly_ taunt him for. I tried to hide a knowing smile as I waited for the pale boy to react to my prying.

"I don't know." He muttered.

The moment was far too precious to let it escape my grasp as I scooted closer to him in interest.

"Was it a present?"

Sai's colored pencil stopped moving across the paper as he began to look at me with a curious face that matched my own.

"Is that a bad idea? I read once that it is a good idea to give someone a parting gift to remember them by." He said innocently.

"Well…it depends on how close you are to the person." I responded as though I were a veteran in relationships.

He bit his lip as he lifted his pencil to tap his chin. "I would _like_ to believe she has grown into a close friend. We have done many things together so I am led to assume the affection between two people is strengthened with activities done together." He said with the same tone one would use to read off an encyclopedia.

"And what _have_ you done together?" I continued to beg for more like a nosy next door neighbor with a surplus of time on her hands.

"Why the sudden interest?" he suddenly asked as he closed his eyes and made the smile he usually gave me as a habit.

The attention being thrown back at me, I pushed myself away and distanced myself from his curious looks.

"N-no interest." I muttered back, thinking that a similar conversation had begun like this between Lee and me. "I'm just…I just want to know I guess. People who are close confide in each other, that means telling them something you normally wouldn't tell others."

Sai seemed to be satisfied with whatever fabrication I had given him and resumed drawing his sketch of his surroundings.

"Well, we've painted…or at least _tried_ to paint-Tenten ended up breaking all the jars with my blended colors that took hours to make. We have eaten ramen together, and then ended up treating Dickless to several bowls when he arrived. I find it very helpful to train with her since Homo prefers to fight with the idiot rather than with me. Unlike you, she has never been a burden to her teammates and carries her own weight although-"

"Do you like her?" I asked, trying ardently to be the mature person in this situation and ignore the harsh comments about my old label in Team Seven.

His pencil once again immediately stopped shading in the scattered liverworts in his picture as he pondered an answer to my odd question. He tapped the tip of his coloring utensil against the paper, creating finely aimed dots while he thought. As though displeased with what was in front of him, he ripped the paper from his sketch book, wrinkled it into a ball, and set it carefully beside him. Beginning to draw his landscape anew with a different colored pencil and fresh paper, he stretched and cracked his knuckles, opting for a new way to start his art.

This gave me no answer.

"Do you like her?" I repeated.

"_Like_?" he echoed the alien word monotonously. "As I continue to read, I find that I _like _many things. I like….to paint, for example. I like the ramen from Ichiraku. I like not being assigned ROOT missions anymore. I like my new friends. I like the sound my alarm clock makes in the morning, I like umeboshi on rainy days, I like-"

"Those are things you either enjoy _experiencing_ or _having_." I corrected sternly, a bit taken back from his odd fondness of his alarm clock in the _morning_. "What I mean to say is this…do you enjoy Tenten's company like I enjoy Lee's? To the point where it is almost _painful_ to not be able to be with them or make them happy?"

Sai cocked his head to the side as he finally decided the correct angle to draw a small rodent foraging the mountain side on his sketch. His eyes never met with mine, a motion I thought was rather unbecoming of him. Black orbs kept to the paper, absorbing every line he drew or painted with great concentration. He brought a hand up to his face and pressed it against his forehead. Cheeks that had once lingered on the verge of malnutrition were now full with the added calories he had consumed after his old master's ejection. The fanatical bastard had probably kept him a strict diet. Wondering why I was placing so much attention on his face, I got back to the subject on hand.

"So do-"

"I like…the _qualities_ she possesses…if that is what you mean, for I don't know any other way of expressing a fondness toward someone. I…admire her strength as a woman…I like how I can speak to her and not get punched if I say something that does not please her…and…I like her patience to explain things to me. I like her lunches because they provide the ideal source of nutrients and energy before a mission. I like how she…seriously handles questions that usually make Naruto laugh or deride me. I like…many things _about_ her." He finished reluctantly, as though in doubt of the way he had given me a response.

I nodded my head in comprehension, somewhat amazed at the depth he had used to base his answers. Despite my urge to continue prying into his newly formed emotions, I thought it better to be prudent and be satisfied with what he had given me. It was, after all, something I have never heard from him. He carried on his prior activity when he realized I was not about to talk back to him. A slight burning of my cheeks at my next thought gave me sufficient warmth to endure the brutal night that was to come.

He was in love.

And the idiot didn't even know it.

"You DID mean what I liked about her as a _person_ correct? Not as a mate to pass on my genetic material?"

I burst into laughter from his naive question.

He really was an idiot.

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

A hand stirred me from my sleep the following morning as I lay curled up in a ball of warmth like an animal. The tundra's nocturnal temperature only worsened as it took a nosedive after the sun's rays abandoned us and left us for dead. My sleeping bag provided a morsel of extra heat that did nothing to assuage the teeth chattering, skin numbing slumber I endured. My eyes not quite prepared to face the morning's rays, I slowly opened them underneath the cover of my sleeping bag. Sai stared back up at me, his hand persistently nudging me until I had completely woken up.

"Sakura…one of the mice returned with information." He whispered urgently.

This piece of enthralling news was all it took to send my body shooting up from the comfort of my blanket. Chilling gusts of air rushed up my shirt and arms, but I gave it no mind as I began to scramble across the cave to find my shoes.

"What are you getting from it?" I asked as I hopped on one foot while I shoved one shoe in the other.

"There are three sets of footprints leading into some nearby mountains." He responded as the bird retreated into its master's hand. "But there is no sign of the team."

"Can it lead us there?" I asked, motioning to the tiny avian residing on Sai.

"Yes, although I think it is a better idea to fly there ourselves. It flew all night to find the place, so it would take us at least a day to walk that distance." He answered as he made a dash to the cave's exit with me in pursuit.

Grateful that he could now fully stand up without a rock ceiling smashing his head, he raised his arms to the sky and stretched his probably aching muscles. I mimicked his movements and found that I had woken up with a strain on my neck from the uncomfortable position I had while sleeping. My teammate squandered no time after getting acclimated to the morning as he flipped open his backpack and jerked out an elongated scroll.

"I am fortunate I brought several jars of ink with me." He stated as he whipped out his brush and began to quickly draw what appeared to be an enormous eagle like bird.

A few hand signs, hastened packing, and a quickly consumed ration later, we were hundreds of feet off the ground following the ink raven. True to its scouting skills, the bird led us to the designated place with ease.

"That's where the footprints ended." Sai said as he pointed to a spot now covered by snow.

"Then that's where we'll look."

My boots crunched against the soft shaven ice as our transportation liquefied and was absorbed by the snow.

"How did you sleep?" came Sai's unexpected question as he began to create more mice to help find clues.

"Horribly." I muttered back. "It didn't matter how many blankets I had over me, I was still freezing."

"You fared no better than I then."

"How about you?"

"I couldn't sleep." He replied as he dispersed the rodents.

"Worried about Tenten?" I teased.

"I wouldn't know. I took some medication but my stomach kept twisting."

"It's probably some slight anxiety symptoms." I said, smiling as I studied the untouched snow. "You'd be better off ju-"

"One of them found something." He interrupted as he held a hand to silence me.

"That didn't take long."

"I specialize in this…" he muttered before breaking into a sprint.

"HEY! WAIT!" I barked as I followed suit on the slippery icy floor.

I could see nothing in front of me save for Sai's hair as it wildly thrashed in the screeching wind. My feet could not take me fast enough to keep up with my teammate's as I kept stumbling on chunks of ice. There was something different about the way he had suddenly begun to run. The way his brows had narrowed before he took off had riveted me and forced me to realize that even _he_- after all the missions, after all the ROOT training he had undergone, after all he had done to kill his emotions- was still a human. His dash seemed irritated- _reckless_ almost as he refused to wait for me or even lessen his speed.

Garnering what vigor I had left, I managed to catch up to him until he made an abrupt stop. The sudden lack of movement nearly sent me crashing into his back as my feet slid uncontrollably on the snow.

"What the hell's _wrong_ with you!?" I yelled, "You could've broken-" he quickly slammed a hand across my mouth to silence my harangue.

"There is a door there." He whispered hesitantly.

"HM?" I mumbled through the freezing skin covering my lips.

A pale finger pointed at what first appeared to be the floor covered in shrubs, reindeer mosses, and liverworts. The handle seemed more like an array of popsicles since frozen icicles hung from the metal.

Sai's hand immediately rose to touch the ice covered door, caution thrown away and his best judgment ignored. My own hand astutely stopped his own in mid action.

"_Don't_ open it. For all we know it could be a trap." I advised.

"How _else_ are we getting in?" he replied calmly, his voice concealing what I thought was frustration.

Sai expressing frustration, or at the very least an adulterated version of the emotion, was something I was not ready to brace as his gaze shifted to me.

It seemed I did not have to answer his question, however, as the door's frozen hinges screeched harshly from their poorly kept conditions. The door opened to reveal a sinuous hallway adorned with the occasional economical light bulb in the distance. My legs shivered as a chilling draft from my side of the door egged me go inside the eerie building. My breathing halted to a reluctant gasping, my quivering dry lips became wet with moisture as I licked them, and skin barely inured to the weather became stiff with trepidation.

An even, smooth, and somewhat pleasant voice reverberated across the hall.

"Hello…and what is…a little girl like yourself doing wandering around?" the voice asked in a tone that demeaned my age.

"I…I..." my breath was visible as it made contact with the freezing atmosphere.

"We're ninja from the Hidden Leaf village…" Sai immediately answered for me as he glared askance at the figure hidden in the safety of the poorly lit room.

"Ah, shinobi? But you are so young! I thought the wars were over!" he said in surprise as he stepped out of the shadows and came under a fizzling light bulb.

The man's crisp and clean white lab coat stood out like a near deity in the dark room. Practically emanating a sense of superiority, he pushed back his thick rimmed glasses with a steady ring finger. Eerily white teeth glistened through the lone light bulb as it continued to flicker like a flame desperate to stay alive. His jet black hair was primly brushed back to avoid strands of it to hinder his view. Despite the man's proper appearance, despite his flawless grooming, despite his pristine and selfless smile, I was instinctively aware of what he dedicated himself to doing. Once near him, I noticed his whole body was redolent of iodine and rubbing alcohol. The overwhelming scent traveled through my sinuses and aggravated my senses with its pungent stench

"These villages have no regard for their youth." He with a frown as he looked at us and shook his head. "Barely able to walk and already trained to kill."

"Am I to assume you are a resident? What is your business here?" my teammate continued to barricade the man with questions.

"Resident?" the man's wrinkled eyebrows burrowed as he repeated the question. "Well, I suppose. I mostly live alone, save for the rare lost traveler." He responded as he eyed us from head to toe.

"Have you seen any activity lately?" Sai again, left me with no room to speak.

"Activity? Has something happen?" the middle aged man asked worriedly. He turned to look at me, but Sai held his arm in front of me as though blocking his view.

"No need for alarm. We are in search of some men and we have reason to believe they are lost in these parts." He replied smoothly, once again making me look like the typical ineffective woman.

"Looking for your comrades are you? Well, I can assure you I have not come across any youths like yourselves for an extended period of time, let alone any _shinobi_." He answered almost jokingly. "But you children look absolutely famished and frozen stiff! Why do you not come rest a bit?" he asked with a welcoming and endearing smile as he extended his hand toward the end of the hall.

"We cannot do that, we need to keep searching." Sai responded stolidly.

The man removed his glasses and inspected a nonexistent speck of dust with a frown. "I believe I can help you in that regard. I stay here to record the activity of migrating birds around this terrain, you see. I have set up cameras in ideal parts of the mountain side to record their behavior." He said with a voice that matched my teammate's in composure.

It seemed this was enough to whet the curiosity of Sai as he lowered the arm he had in front of me.

"If your friends passed through here, then surely one of my cameras has footage of it?" His offer tempted us to walk further into the room until the numbing winds were long forgotten behind us. With ease and a pleasant smile, the man took several steps behind us and closed the door. "There should be a snowstorm soon anyway, is it not better to stay and watch the videos rather than squander your time blindly running through snow?"

He had a fine point. The man pushed his glasses toward the top bridge of his nose, the clean lenses shimmering in the light.

Sai at first still seemed reluctant to acquiesce to his offer, but said nothing as he looked back at me.

"Show us the tapes from up to two weeks ago." he demanded without so much as a tint of prudence.

The man's eyes lit up in amusement as he nodded in agreement.

"Certainly! But would you not like to introduce yourselves first? It is not often I receive such pleasant visitors!"

My throat seemed to be jammed and closed as I continued to gawk at the older man. Thick rimmed glasses stared back at me in curiosity as I hid in the safety of Sai's back. It was not as though I needed protection, rather, it was the fact that I found this scientist so riveting to gaze at. His smell continued to burn my nose with a nauseating effect and his perfectly aligned bleach white teeth began to put me on edge.

"I am Lee, this is Tenten." Sai muttered as he pointed at me.

I did not question the concealment of our names.

We did not achieve what we had hoped for from the man. His face showed no sliver of surprise, no scent of alarm, nothing resembling a fearful reaction as he shook hands with both of us and smiled in return.

"Lovely names. As for me, I would be delighted if you would simply call me Professor. I rarely get called that, you see, I rather dislike my name." he added superfluously.

"The tapes please." Sai demanded.

"Ah yes! I even stored them in a heated cell beyond this hallway!" the man answered excitedly as he motioned us to follow him. "I am glad to have such pleasant visitors! It is rare in these parts you see. I will bring you some tea and blankets momentarily." He rambled on as he unlocked a door.

Leading us inside, he pointed to several shelves stacked with videos.

"Where are the-"

"Numbers T1 to T14 are the complete days you are looking for I believe." The "professor" commented before Sai could demand anymore of him. As though contemplating the matter while tapping his index finger across his chin, he motioned to three television sets on a tiny oak table and several cushions on the floor. "You'll have to excuse me, apparently I would rather use my funding for more equipment rather than a couch for the room." He said jokingly.

I smiled at his embarrassed apology and waved if off.

"We…we are just so grateful you can help us." I finally managed to voice my thanks.

With a final pleasant look in our direction, the man left us to our business.

Sai had not even begun to browse through the tapes when I finally opened my mouth again to berate him.

"You're…an idiot. You do realize this could very well be a trap?"

"We don't have a choice." He replied dryly. "He's _letting_ us see the tapes isn't he? If he had anything to do with this incident he probably wouldn't have told us that he had them in the first place."

I grumbled some incoherent complaint, pulling a nearby blanket over my legs as I sat on the hard metal floor. The room was scarcely decorated, the walls made of steel like some sort of panic room and the floor scantly swept. At the very least it was heated.

"The first day shows us nothing." He stated as he fast forward through a whole day's worth of activities.

"I'll start on the second week then." I offered, starting up the screen on my end.

For four hours we did nothing but flash forward through footage of birds flying, eating, fighting, and mating. My sore neck was just about to give up before I saw the faint silhouette of someone walking in the distance.

"Sai?"

"What is it?" he mumbled wearily.

"I..I think I see Tenten."

Sure enough, two familiar buns were visible through the static and silent screen. Behind her shoulder she had Neji's arm as her teammate helped support the weight of her bandaged leg. A pained expression shot across her face as she took a hasty step in the teeming snow. The Hyuga turned to speak, no doubt to admonish her. She shook her head, rejecting whatever her teammate had said. The Hyuga's lips tightened, his eyes narrowed, as he lowered his left arm while his right held a firm grip on her back.

My brow suddenly quirked in interest at the scene unfolding before us.

Again Tenten appeared to be fiercely opposed to whatever Neji was telling her with his usual scowl. It was only once we saw him gracefully sweep his free arm under her legs that we realized what his intentions were. I tried to keep my eyes on the television even as I felt Sai straighten his back and stiffen his hands at what was happening. His reaction, if I could call it that, was quite spontaneous. I watched as Neji's eyes softened, a dramatic contrast from his habitual hostile glaring orbs. His mouth opened once again, making me wish I had learned how to lip read instead of squandering time learning how to arrange flowers in the academy. I growled impatiently, my interest long forgotten on my friends' tension filled moment as I stretched my hand toward the screen and pushed the fast forward button.

The two figures appeared frantic as they quickly traveled away from their current spot. At the sudden movement on my behalf, Sai barely managed to hold back a dissatisfied gasp that I still managed to detect.

"What's wrong?" I asked brusquely.

My teammate shrugged and mumbled a toneless "Nothing." As the video ran out of film.

"Didn't seem like nothing to me." I pried, knowing well the sight of them together had probably riled whatever sediments of emotion he had stored in that empty shell of a body. "Why else would you have volunteered for this mission?"

Sai's entire body stiffened from the shrewd comment, but he allowed no such vulnerability to be so horribly blatant to me. He cleared his throat and handed me another tape.

"Is it not honorable to aid your comrades?"

"Did you learn that from a book too?" I joked.

The boy frowned and shook his head as though insulted. "From Tenten, actually." He grumbled hesitantly.

It seemed I had strung a sensitive cord within the human mirror, making me opt for silence to spare him anymore distress. Not that I was one for empathy when it came to minding Sai's "feelings", if they could even be called that, but I knew prudency when it was needed.

"Continue to watch the videos for me. I'm going to take a look around." He stated as he rose his place on the hard heated floor and stiffly walked towards the exit door.

"Be careful." I muttered, somewhat peeved from his decision.

As his figure disappeared so did his companionship in this cramped and intimidating room. It was not that I was frightened of the various questionable sounds emitting from the wilderness surrounding the outside of the room, that wasn't it, that wasn't it at all. The thing that seemed to put me on edge would be how a person's imagination could drive them to insanity. It was curious how in tune one's senses became when silence was the only companion. Birds chirped frantically as though an atrocity was bound to come, heavy pieces of snow splattered across the roof as the weather exacerbated, my heart itself could be heard in the dense air as it became harder to breathe.

Something else was off…something about that man.

He had seemed cordial enough, his smile could warm even the most freezing of nights. But in the midst of my chaotic pondering and sprouts of paranoia, I began to think the worst of him. I knew. I knew but I did not wish to admit it. I knew that behind the smile, behind the clean shaven face, behind those spotless glasses, behind his gentlemanly behavior…the sediments of this scientist's mind hid the depraved urges of a sadistic individual.

As if to answer my psychiatrically disordered conclusion, the faint sound of a shrill shriek reverberated across the room. My eyes widened and my chest contracted in fright as the sickening noise spun throughout my body and froze every vein within it. My entire being was thrown into sudden shock while I lay frozen by the floor, wondering where it had originated from, but too terrorized to _want_ to know.

A black mass ran across the television screen, its blurry disposition occupying my attention evanescently. I careened my head back to the video, wondering who exactly it was that I had seen. Splattered on the snow in this video was some sort of black liquid that could not be fully identified. My breathing hitched to a halt once I saw Lee's strolling and dazed form, his hand clutching his right arm as it exuded and left a trail of blackened blood behind him.

I tried to make sense out of the scene, the scream still ringing endlessly in my ears.

"Lee…" I choked out, my throat collapsing from the overload of stimuli.

Shoving every pillow and blanket aside, I made a frantic dash toward the door, to search for Sai if he was not dead already.

"Sai? Come in Sai." I whispered to my neck piece radio in haggard gasps once I could run no longer.

All the doors were locked and there was no sign of the Professor.

"Sakura? What's wrong?" his poorly heard voice provided an immense sense of relief to my system.

"Glad you're not dead yet, you idiot! You should have waited for me!" I hissed at the mouthpiece.

"Oh? But then I wouldn't have found Tenten." He replied casually.

"You…_what_? Sai, where did you-?"

"Meet us somewhere."

"Where?" I asked, overwhelmed at the mazelike hallways that only seemed to elongate the farther I ran across them.

"I don't know actually, we're somewhere between a pit and a lab." He replied as static began to eat away at his voice.

"Sai? Sai come in! You're breaking u-OOF!" I blurted out with the last of my breath in that poorly lit room as my body slammed itself into something that resembled an ice wall.

"Are you all right?" Careful hands managed to place me at a safe distance away from the chilling obstacle.

The monotonous voice was alarm enough to shove his hands away from my arms as though they were burning coals.

"My dear what has gotten into you?" the older man asked kindly with a worried expression. "You're face is white."

"I…I…decided to take a break." I mumbled, hoping to take a few steps away from him.

He allowed no such luxury and instead opted to block my path with his tall figure.

"Oh, you must be exhausted from watching all those videos." He said sympathetically. "Would you like some tea?"

"No thank you." I responded quickly, trying to walk past him to no avail. He simply took a step to the side to block me yet again.

"Then would you like to see my son?" he asked in that same amicable tone of voice. He smiled as though he had inquired about how I was enjoying my visit, as though he had offered me a tour of his lab, as though he had given me a cup of tea.

My eyes watered in a livid medley of grief, frustration, bewilderment, and killing intent. A voice that wanted to scream demands, threats, and incoherent curses could not find itself in the midst of my mental chaos. Oxygen had completely left my system, leaving my lungs to fend for themselves while I fought to gather my thoughts. The man continued to smile as he took a few steps back.

"Wh….wh….where…where is…he?" I growled, my fingers automatically readying a kunai knife from my back pocket.

The professor took off his uncontaminated glasses and rubbed them against a handkerchief that hung from his breast pocket, looking as though the whole world had to pause if something was out of place for him.

"He is quite stable…at least for now." He answered with a yawn. "Oh dear, it seems my body is suffering the side effects of inadequate sleep."

"You…you…" I could word no imaginable curse at this despicable man before me.

I ran past him, hoping fearlessly to distract him with a few thrown shuriken as I steadied the kunai in my other hand.

The motion was fast, ruthless, and reckless.

It was exhilarating…_riveting_ even, feeling the blade rip through the stomach of his thick white lab coat and pierce through the tender flesh that lay underneath. I felt the obstinate resistance flesh usually gives when being ripped apart by force. I felt the desperate struggle between meat and metal as it sliced through the precious veins and tendons that kept the man together. Squandering no time in even pulling the knife out, I chose to simply swirl and shove the sharp object further into his delicate belly. It was then that I peered at the man through blood sputtered eyes. His face seemed contorted in a grotesque expression from the apparent pain. The whites of his eyes bulged with each push of the kunai I gave, its blade making a red trail as my fingers guided it through his abdomen and chest. His mouth was gaping at me, attempting to plead with me no doubt.

"Feel good, you bastard?" I spat with a sadistic smirk.

I hoped his innards had fallen once I heard the heavy splatter of thick fluids spraying out from within him. A seemingly endless stream of blood continued to vomit from his belly as water shoots from a hose.

Only then did I realize a cloud of smoke had surrounded me.

"Sakura, next time I would recommend taking a less audacious approach." The man's voice taunted behind me as he stood calmly by one of the doors.

'_Substitution? But…how?' _

I had little time to ponder on this matter as I felt the ground give in to my weight. The cracked light bulbs were now nonexistent; darkness had taken their place. All I was faced with was the sickening empty sensation my stomach made as I began to fall into whatever pit Lee's father had prepared for me. Legs that were once sternly standing now fell victim to piercing obstacles that sent strong shots of pain throughout my body. My arms tried desperately to grab hold of anything that would stop or at least attenuate the blow of my plunge into this seeming endless black hole. My fingers were met with sharp edges and rocks that seemed slick with some sort of slippery gunk. I could feel my own flesh becoming one with the rocks as I was sure the sheer speed of my fall began to chip off all my nails one by one and shredded the skin of my legs while I tried to latch on to something-ANYTHING.

My own deafening scream bounced off the walls of the pit and merely exacerbated my terrified state.

'_Need to need to need to need to need to_-' my mind kept repeating as I looked blindly in this lightless space.

Relief rushed to my senses as I finally caught hold of something. It released a startling cracking noise as it bent under my weight and faintly supported me. Nearly delirious from being saved, I lessened the impact of my fall by grabbing on to the long and surprisingly moist object with both hands until I ripped it from its roots and continued the rest of my journey down. It had thankfully been enough, however, to completely avoid a few certain broken bones, but not a swollen rear as I landed flat on my back with a sickening splat. A murky substance sputtered from the ground with the sudden impact of my body, landing on my face, lips, eyes, arms, chest, and any other exposed part of my body. I let out a pained groan as I continued to lie in wretched agony in my dim surroundings.

"Ugh….ugh…agh…" was I could moan out in my throbbing state.

Forcing my wobbling legs to straighten out, I managed to stand and take a much needed deep breath…only to find myself staring at my own vomit as I came crashing back down on knees from an overpowering reek permeated in the room. An unimaginable stench had reached my nose, one that I had not noticed due to the sheer terror and tenacity to survive the fall. Again, I returned the remnants of a hastily eaten breakfast, gagging any time I attempted to breathe. Unable to stand the putrid smell, I ripped the bottom fabric of my shirt in the midst of desperation and managed to mitigate the torture by covering my mouth and nose with it.

'_What the hell is around me?'_ I wondered, fighting to keep from regurgitating any acid saturated particles.

It was not long before I pinpointed the scent.

It keenly resembled something my mother had forgotten in the kitchen for three days in the summer heat…something she had accidentally left there to thaw…something in a butcher shop. Something…something…

'_Rotten._'

I nervously fidgeted with the back of my kunai pouch for a flare. I popped the top open and ripped the top layer to reveal a flash of burning light that revealed my surroundings.

What I was faced with only forced a guttural scream out of me.

My body began to heave gastric acid since what little remained of my meals had already accompanied the floor. I tried to scream, but appalling reek of countless fetid corpses entered my mouth and forced more bodily fluids out of me. Pieces of heads, arms, torsos, and a myriad of limbs hung from hooks like chunks of meat inside a freezer. Some appeared to have been festering there for years judging from the rate of decay, others were new…"fresher".

"O-oh god…" was all I could utter in the revolting room.

Slivers of putrid flesh and coagulated blood littered the floor, making walking nearly impossible with each slippery step I took. I let out a pitiful yelp with each fall I took as my legs gave in time and time again. Holding back one final gastric acid filled gag, I managed to pick myself up again and attempt to find a wall. If I could somehow climb out of here, I'd be all right.

Climb…just climb…just climb.

Prickling thorns grated through my skin, piercing their way into my knees as I tried to cling on to anything that could pull me up. My feet pitifully continued to slip with each attempt I made to transfer chakra to them. The wall was slick with mud and the rotting flesh of numerous humans. The stiff carcasses released a maddening smell that internally shoved the contents of my already empty stomach into the floor. My nose felt as if it were being pierced with countless needles each time I tried to breathe though it. The stench was overwhelming, was _maddening_.

"SOMEONE THERE!?" a voice other than my own boomed through the wretched room.

"LEE!? NEJI!? SAI!?" I screamed back, the smell stealing what little remained of my sanity. I didn't care to whom this voice belonged to, I was just grateful I was not alone in here.

"IT'S NEJI! WHERE ARE YOU!?"

"I'M HERE!" I yelled, flailing my flare wildly in the air in hopes of getting his attention. "CAN YOU SEE THE BURNING FLARE!?"

"…N-NO! FOLLOW MY VOICE!" he demanded through the thickness of the night like atmosphere.

"WHAT'S WRONG!? USE YOUR BYAKUGAN!" I loudly offered, my hand still wailing the flare.

"I….I…I CAN'T!" his voice grew hesitant.

"WHAT!? _WHY_!?" The flare dropped to the floor.

"YOUR VOICE IS GETTING CLOSER! I…I THINK I CAN MAKE OUT THE FLARE!"

Sure enough, the drained figure of Neji rose from the shadows of the horrid room. His hand clutched his left arm, no doubt injured from his endeavors. Laborious panting echoed through the room as he closed the distance between us. A mess stood before me: a perspiring, tarnished, bloody, bandaged mess. A dirty patch was wrapped around his right eye, soaked red with his bodily fluids. His left eye was partly open, revealing only half of his turmoil and emotions.

"Neji?...Neji what happened to you!?" I exclaimed in trepidation as I tried to support his heavy body with what diminutive strength my frail body could give.

"I'm fine, I'm fine…" he muttered, his muscles tensing as I touched him. "How did you get here? How did you know we were here?"

"That's not important right now." I answered. "Where are the rest?"

Neji grunted in pain as I set him down and picked up the flare from its place on the bloody floor.

"I haven't seen Lee in two days…I assume the worst. As for Tenten…"

"She's with Sai." I interrupted, hoping to give him some hope to deter him from his forlorn state.

"They sent that ROOT member with you?" he spat out, his left eye widening in disbelief. "I hope she's all right."

"She is, don't worry. Sai's skills in defensive maneuvers are as great as his social skills are horrible." I assured.

The Hyuga scoffed at my attempt to nervously joke and sent half a glare at me.

"This _hardly_ seems like the time and place to fool around don't you think Sakura?" he reprimanded as he stood up with trembling legs and took the flare from my hand.

"_Anywhere_ hardly seems like the time to joke around for _you_." I mumbled back under my breath in hopes of him not taking heed.

Neji sighed and began to walk. "I heard some running water as I was falling down here…let's follow that noise…maybe it will lead us to some sort of opening."

"Do you want something to cover your nose? The smell here is suffocating." I offered, motioning to my makeshift face mask I had fashioned out of my clothes.

He shook his head as he kicked some piece of flesh to the side with his foot. "No. I've gotten used to it."

That sufficed as an answer for him and he refused to talk lest I started the conversation first.

"How did you get down here?"

"I fell." He said obviously, his voice outright insulting me.

"Well, I _assumed _that much. What I'm asking is for details."

The man turned his head around to face me, a menacing glow in his beaten eye berated me into silence.

"I was looking my teammates…and that bastard found me first." He said succinctly. "How about _you_?"

I cringed from his rather hostile voice.

"I was supposed to meet up with Sai…my communicator broke as I fell, so I have no way to get in touch with him." I said, ripping the now useless small piece of technology from my neck and throwing it on the floor.

"Ugly dog?" we heard someone moan in a mixture of pain and deliria, "Is that you?"

Both Neji and I froze in the middle of our walking, unanimously wondering how it was possible that yet _another_ one of our teammates had been stupid enough to fall for this trap.

"SAI!" I yelled out my friend's name. Never had hearing my horrible nickname from that idiot artist ever brought such relief and happiness to me.

"Sai, where are you?" Neji questioned the utter darkness, making sure to walk slowly in a circle as he held out the flare to lighten our view.

"I…I don't know…something's got my legs…I think it's a corpse judging from the stench." He stated rather uneventfully as though he were giving the answer to how his day was. "Could be wrong…it could be an animal. Either way it's a good thing the meat's soft from the humidity and decomposing or I might've broken-"

"Sai, can you please shut up!?" I begged lividly.

How anyone with a shred of humanity could take such a macabre sight and be unfazed by it was a wonder to me.

"Sai, we don't' have time for your morbid remarks." Neji concurred with me as he grabbed my arm and led me through the aimless space. "Now try to talk about something else while we find you."

"I'm assuming your byakugan doesn't work, otherwise you would have used it to find me. So, how are your eyes?" the ex ROOT member tried to broach a different subject.

"Useless. Now talk about something else." He responded bitterly.

"I saw Tenten and Lee."

I could feel Neji's grip on my arm tighten in alarm at the sound of his teammates' names. His voice seemed infused with tension as he spoke.

"Where are they?" he seethed calmly.

"I don't know anymore. As soon as the man in the lab coat saw me he set off a trap and I got sent down here." He responded rather glumly. "I was very close to freeing both of them too."

"How was Lee?" Neji continued to barricade the poor boy with questions.

"Chained up, apparently."

It was not long before the light of the flare rested on a struggling form of Sai trying to free himself from his fleshy prison. Taking note of Neji's injured state, I took it upon myself to be the one to climb the small mountain of corpses to rescue my teammate. Trying not to gag, I tried to push the massive pieces of deteriorated fat to the side and helped him out of the human pile of gunk. My weary muscles throbbed in agony and my grunts mutated into full out yells, the force of the pull brining shots of pain to the bleeding wounds around my body. I have had enough of this hellhole, I wanted out, I wanted-NEEDED to find my best friends, my comrades, my lover. With one final climatic scream I managed to kick the last chunk of heavy meat with a furious kick. Nothing would keep me from Tenten or Lee, not even this.

"Th-thank you Sakura." Sai muttered. His gratitude was evident in his airless voice as he struggled to take several much needed breaths.

I only scowled in envy when I realized he had not bent down and heaved, lying in his own vomit as I had. His experiences in life and training under Danzo had no doubt left him inured to such reactions.

"We need to find a way out of here. I am afraid we won't last in here very long if we stay much longer." Neji stated as we stumbled back down the human hill.

What came next from the Hyuga dared an apparently gall filled Sai to hold back something resembling a laugh.

"Now let's hold hands."

Even during my frissons and horrid visual experiences, I somewhat released a surprised stifled chuckle at his odd request. Sensing our confusion, Neji was quick to rectify himself.

"Let's hold hands so we won't get _separated_ you fools." He seethed.

"_Oh_." Sai said, amusement not completely absent on his part.

"S-sure." I muttered, feeling two hands cup around my own on opposite sides.

We meandered through the room with merely a flare to light our way for what seemed like hours before any of us spoke again.

"Sai, what were you doing when you found Tenten?" his tone concealed a reprimanding aura behind it, the kind my parents often started talking with before we began to fight.

"Well, hiding…obviously."

I rolled my eyes, for once thankful that neither of the men could see me.

"In what condition was she?" he asked coldly, as though it was Sai's fault that Tenten was even in trouble.

"She was all right…unconscious, but all right." My albino teammate assured.

"Why were you sent with Sakura on this mission?" Neji practically insulted him.

"Are my skills inadequate for such a task?" Sai responded innocently.

I felt both men's grips on my hand increasingly tighten as the conversation drove on.

"Not inadequate…maybe just superfluous. They could have sent Shino, but I'm surprised Lady Hokage chose you."

"Well, in this whole time we have been aimlessly walking, my ink creations I made as I was falling have already found an exit." Sai answered stoically, albeit with his habitual smile as he released my hand. "So…sometimes…it is better to be superfluous rather than _inept_."

I swore my carpals would snap off if Neji continued to hang on any longer with that deadly strength of his. At least we were finally able to escape the hellish meat locker prison.

(Much to Neji's chagrin.)

It was not long after we began to see a few meager traces of light through the tunnel and began to climb upwards that I felt the ground crumbling beneath me again.

"N-neji." I muttered, noticing my arm was beginning to stretch as though he were pulling me up.

It was only when the floor decided to completely collapse that I realized Sai's hand had left my own and Neji's was trying fervently to not let go. The sheer bafflement over being stupid enough to fall for this trap again left me without breath or reaction as the back of my head smashed against jagged rocks, knocking me out in the process, and dragging us down anew.

"SAKURA! HOLD ON!"

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

My lids were heavy with sleep as I regained consciousness. Faint iridescent lights poked through my corneas like needles when I tried to open them. My throat felt as though it had been saturated with mud and left to bake in the ruthless summer sun. Any attempts to talk were littered with unrelenting periods of coughing and hacking. Muscles felt torn from their ligaments and bones, my body was bereft of any sense of acknowledgment in regards to where I was. I groaned in pain as I tried to shift my body. My arms seemed to be restricted by something hard. I barely managed to crack open one eye to see I was bound by rusted shackles slowly shredding my skin whenever I tried to move. It seemed the chains also served another purpose. I groaned realizing the metal was slowly eating away at my chakra.

"Overall healthy female, age varies from 18 to 25 years of maturity, and oh!-rare phenotype of hair color I see." A familiar voice said in surprise as I heard the furious scribble of a pen on a notepad.

I managed to look up to find _his_ eyes hidden behind the glare of his glasses never leaving me.

"You are a medic, aren't you?" he asked with a pleasant smile, "I can tell by the structure of your body. To be a ninja this long without epidermal tissue damage, you must have some impressive healing jutsus."

"…Wh…what?" I asked hoarsely.

The man chuckled and placed the pen behind his ear.

"You know, I could use someone of your caliber. Unlike my offspring, you will not be used for any petty experiments I can assure you." He offered calmly.

"Where's…Lee?" I supplicated as I became entrapped in the midst of another wheezing fit.

If I coughed anymore I feared I would soon hack blood.

The professor cocked his head to the side as though he were a puzzled dog and tapped his lower lip in contemplation.

"Lee?...OH!" he snapped his fingers. "The youngest of the offsprings. Yes, I faintly remember leaving one behind, albeit moribund."

"Where…is he?" I demanded to know through trembling lips.

"He is…safe…for the time being anyway. I am afraid your vision might be a tad bit blurry from the medication I gave you, but you can see him can you not?" he asked as he walked over to what seemed darkness until I heard the click of a light being turned on.

Blinding light hit my corneas like bricks.

Barely audible breathing possessed his bare chest, stained red from various cuts and open bruises. Chains clinked lazily against one another and dragged across the floor as the professor pulled at them callously. Long unkempt black hair proving his long stay in this hell covered the eyes I wanted desperately to see. Lee's arms were pulled behind him, shackled and trembling from trauma. His head lied motionlessly on the floor, mouth agape to allow a few shallow breaths to be taken. His body seemed to have been thrown on the floor, his own blood splattered across the metal tiles and creating tiny congealed pools.

"…" I said nothing as my mind froze from his state. The half naked image of a battered and blood soaked Lee was now forever imprinted on my mind, mere inches away from me yet unreachable due to the chakra reducing chains bound to my body.

The man's piercing eyes looked down at his son, sniffing once disdainfully as he used his foot to roll the boy's half conscious body to the side. "I managed to collect all of you, save for that annoying boy with the ROOT training. I wonder how Danzo is doing." He said absentmindedly.

Chains clinked lazily next to me.

"…Sai will find you…so long as members from that division breathe, they will kill." A different voice spoke, a ragged one faring no better than mine.

"Oh, hello what have we here? It seems the little Hyuga boy is back. You're a bit of a masochist aren't you?" the man asked as his attention was taken away from Lee and traveled to Neji.

He had apparently been chained up a foot to the side of me. The professor gave him a daunting smile and walked toward my comrade.

"Shut up." The pale eyed boy ordered through clenched teeth as he pulled at his chains.

"I would not bother trying any of your jutsus. The medication I just gave you will make sure of that." He recommended smugly. "But it almost seems like all those drugs I injected through your bloodstream eventually wore off….tell me Hyuga…how is your eye?"

Neji could say no more.

He attacked, albeit his hands were left inches away from the man's face because of the metal holding him back.

"I mean, how many times _did_ I take it out while you were constrained? How many times did I study it and gave you _just_ enough sedatives to make you feel the _slight_ discomfort as your nerves ripped through my scalpel?…Although it _did_ get rather messy with the blood when I punctured your choroid. Do you remember Hyuga?" he degraded him like a cruel boy teases a leashed dog with a bone.

The man cocked his head to the side, looking curiously at Neji. He raised his hand, making sure to clench it tightly into a fist. A chuckle escaped his mouth as he shot it at my comrade's face with an unmitigated strength and speed.

"Bastard." He muttered as he spewed out blood now swirling around in his mouth.

"Now why do you detest me so Hyuga?" the professor asked him innocently. "I give you shelter from the unforgiving tundra like all of my visitors. I spare you, mind you, only to find that you do not want your safety in exchange for the life of my 'son'." He uttered the last word as though it disgusted him.

"Return Tenten to me!" he screamed himself raw at the vile man, not even listening to his words.

"'Ten…ten?'" he tried pronouncing the name, oddly taking pleasure in saying the alien word used to refer our friend. He turned to a woman strapped to a hospital bed as though she were a lunatic about to undergo a lobotomy. His eyes and legs slowly traveled to her in astonishment. "Ah, so it has a _name_ too! It's a shame I do not really care for individual labels." He said rather dejectedly. "I think I shall call this female by a number. It sounds easier to remember, don't you think so?" he asked my unconscious friend as his fingers gently stroked her chin.

"DON'T YOU _DARE_ TOUCH HER!" the pale eyed man shouted in frustration as he tried to extricate himself from the heavy chains. "I _SWEAR_ I'LL KILL YOU!"

If he struggled with the metal restraints any more I feared he would literally rip his arms out of their sockets. It seemed he was prepared to do so as the sound of popping synovial fluid in his bones began to reach my ears. The deranged doctor merely looked at him in disbelief and scoffed at his impudence.

"_Kill_ me?" he asked him as he walked toward my teammate and stopped inches in front of him. "I am merely taking note of her excellent epidermis. Rest assure, I am quite the gentleman."

"GO TO HELL!"

With that final curse, Neji spat in the man's face.

I blinked in amazement over the crude behavior, having a lack of energy to gather much of a reaction.

The bodily fluid held a bright red tint as it crept down the white coat, no doubt mingled with the blood still lingering in Neji's mouth.

Lee's father stared in shock at the pink saliva trickling down his once pristine face and straightened clothes, not quite grasping what action had occurred.

"Next time you touch her you're going to wish these chains were still keeping me back." He seethed a warning, glaring at him with useless eyes.

The older man sighed and took a pair of latex gloves from his front pocket.

"I shouldn't expect much from that boy's friends…he always _was_ the most unruly one of the family." He commented with that deuce smile of his.

This observation was enough to set Neji off again as he began to viciously tug at the chains to no avail. "…bastard…"

"It seems you are experiencing some slight nervous tension…I have something for that." The man said, a frown forming as he calmly strode down to his kempt metal table. His fingers grabbed a white handkerchief to dab away at the red streak across his clothing before grabbing a cylinder shaped glass filled with liquid. It was only until I blinked through my hindered eyes that I realized it was a hypodermic needle with a thick tip that would raise fear into anyone's consciousness. I tried to speak, but it was as though whatever he had forced down my throat had paralyzed my tongue and body.

"Youth has such an unpromising prospect. Don't you agree?" he asked in his twisted manner to create small talk as he took a few cotton swabs and dipped them in rubbing alcohol before making his way to a fuming Neji.

"I will personally strangle you with your own organs you bastard!"

"Tsk…such vulgar talk…one thing that I am grateful for is at least having a respectful son. He was always so eager to do things…so very…_submissive_." He said as he carefully flicked at the tube to rid it of air bubbles. "Don't want you dying, now do we? After all, I _must_ study those eyes again."

With a delicate hand, he took hold of Neji's struggling arm, flipping it over to get at the sensitive veins under the skin.

"I will free myself…" he threatened, his struggles diminishing by the moment as the liquid was completely inserted into him. Eyes that had once been glaring at the man were now fighting off a heavy eyelid. "I will…smash your head…in a box…filled with… infected…needles…" were his slurred terrorizations.

His promise found no end as he drifted into unconsciousness, defeated, lost. The man scoffed pitifully at him, taking Neji's face into his hand before slapping it a bit to affirm his lack of consciousness. He looked on in amusement as he took a few strands of the Hyuga's long hair in his hand and let his fingers sift through them.

"To think...I can burn his whole body and still have his entire genetic code so long as a _single _strand of his hair exists." he mumbled as he took a scapel from his medical tray and playfully ran it through Neji's scalp all the way to his ends. "Research in mitochondrial DNA has made vast improvements..." he collected my comrade's hair around his hand, creating a pony tail that reached Neji's waist. "...It is unfortunate that I prefer dissecting my specimens rather than taking mere samples..."

Neji's head fell numbly to the side, his whole drugged body completely unaware of this physical intrusion. The man smirked and raised his scapel. "But I am sure I can make an exception this time." The sharp edge of the knife ripped through his hair, cutting it swiftly as though it were a machete slashing through lush vines and leaves.

I gaped in bafflement over the scientist's warped behavior, crushed by the destruction of one of the many things Neji probably held dear to him. Any emotion over the swift movement was condensced in a slight twitching in discomfort from my friend. I looked in livid fascination as the man before me ceased to look familiar. His headband had long been thrown into the floor from the cutting action, leaving behind nothing but uneven short chops of hair and his detested Hyuga seal. He might as well been laid bare for the world to see. His bloody and tarnished face held stray pieces of his hair.

"Leave…him…" I snarled wearily at him, hoping he wouldn't decide to cut something else.

The professor turned his head to look at me with those numbing black orbs of his. "And you…I have not forgotten about you my dear." He smiled again, paying no mind to the cascade of hair in his hands as he let it drop on the floor. "You seem to rival my skills in medicinal and healing jutsus…it would be quite a delight to have someone who was not completely useless by my side."

"…What?" I grumbled, confused by his total lack of affliction for other people

"What do you say?" he offered softly as though I were a timid cat that needed to be won over, "I let you go, you get to live, and I can guarantee your name will be famous throughout the lands with our research!"

"Research? _What_ research?" I asked, my head pounding like someone was drilling holes into it.

"I have been analyzing various types of human tissue, adipose cells, and even muscle. But I am sure you are well aware of that from what you found downstairs." He added tonelessly like it was obvious every scientist had a vile collection of human limbs and bodies festering in his basement. "Did you know that with certain drugs that I have been testing, I can guarantee the building blocks of these organs and tissues will not be injured even under extreme environmental conditions?"

I coughed blood in return.

And the man continued as though I had simply nodded.

"Anyway," he began excitedly. "Take temperature for example…it must be…about 36 degrees in Fahrenheit outside correct? With these drugs, I can guarantee an anti-freezing protein will keep a soldier's blood from solidifying. What the drug does is deliver a certain protein to chromo-"

"Is that why you kill people?" I questioned spitefully.

"What do you mean?" he responded briskly. His once brightened face had faltered and was now glaring at me. "Kill people? My dear, _you_ do it all the time, now is hardly the time to preach something you do not even practice! Take this boy here," he pointed to Lee's bent over form as though he were an animal, "his death would benefit millions, his _life_, however, would affect no one."

The rusted chains that clasped my hands rattled wildly about me as I tried to break free from them as Neji had attempted. I clenched my teeth and hands, trying with all my strength to remain calm. It was in this miniscule second that I tried to find peace that I managed to see a glimpse of Sai's silhouette hiding in the shadows of the lab.

'_Smart man_.'

I only prayed the man did not find out. I had to think of something ingenious to say in order to stall for whatever my teammate was planning. My mind dashed through possible ways to broach something plausible for conversation. The only thing I had learnt from this horrid man was that he was obsessed with his creations and experiments. I had to make do with that.

"Y-yes…" I gulped down the ball of pity and shame I had lodged in my throat as I found myself agreeing with what the professor had said about Lee. "N-now that…you use _him_ as an example…I-I can see what your point is." I stammered.

At the sound of my voice actually concurring with his father, my lover's bloodshot eyes were finally visible as he lifted his head an inch above the ground. His breathing was laborious, as though it hurt him to send air to his lungs. My statement had no doubt left him perplexed, wounded…betrayed.

"Sak…" he whimpered, not even able to finish my name. His head returned to the floor, beaten and disgraced.

His father, however, resumed his blissful façade and gasped. "You see? This…this _thing_, has no real prerogative in life. His genes are far too faulty, too tarnished, too _weak_ to be allowed to pass off into the next generation!"

I held back the stings of tears as I heard a choked sob from Lee.

"You know I always thought that? He _was_ the weakest of the genin after all! I am sure his skills are the same as they were years ago!" I agreed, noticing the man had nodded and began to look through his pockets in search of something.

I turned to look at Lee, but it seemed he had stopped moving. I only knew he was still alive because of the cries he emitted that were muffled by the floor he lied on.

"To _think_!" he exclaimed with relief while he fumbled with a set of keys to free me, "If he were allowed to live, he would provide _nothing_ to aid in the survival of his offspring! Would _you_ like his hereditary defections to be mixed in with your own superior ones?"

"O-of course not! W-we are doctors, chemists…scientists!" I replied, feeling every word like a knife to my chest. "I would not like to procreate with such an inferior specimen!"

Lee's anguish was one with my own.

I was grateful he had released me.

It gave me the upper hand as I launched my fist at his unsuspecting smile and sent him flying to a nearby wall. Sai's ferocious ink creatures were soon at the man's body, holding it down before he even had a chance to respond to my sudden treachery. He looked at me with widened eyes and stuttered curses that could not be heard from his bloodied mouth.

"You psychotic bastards are all the same. Pampering your ego always works to win your trust." I spat as I cracked my knuckles. "Sai! Grab his keys!" I yelled.

Wasting no time, the ninja craftily drew a snake to safely grab hold of the fallen keys through its neck. It slithered toward me, ever the obedient tool to its master.

"LEE!" I screamed at my moribund boyfriend, "GET YOUR ASS UP!" I ordered.

The idiot was still hunched over the ground, apparently still appalled from my infidelity.

"But my dear!" the bastard behind me tried to explicate his vile reasons for his actions. "Is this how you prove your trust? Have you an inkling of who I am?"

"I don't give a _damn_ about who you are!" I spat out with a look that showed my upmost anathema towards the man as I began to unlock the intricate myriad of chains that bounded Lee. He easily acquiesced to my actions stoically, his pallid face in shock from what I had dishonestly professed. His unclothed back was slick with cold perspiration and littered with what appeared to be pricks from needles, shoddily healing scars covered in scabs, and lacerations from god know what that sick doctor had used.

"Lee? _Lee_!?" I yelled at his body, locked in fetal position, his face partly hidden from my view. I took his damp unshaven jaw into my hands with tenacity and desperation as I began to softly tilt his head towards my eyes. I received no reaction from him, merely his voice mustering a frightening choked puling that forced a lump into my throat.

"Boy…get up." The man ordered through bloody clenched teeth.

I turned to face him, giving the psychotic scientist a flustered look that said nothing and yet evidently showed my livid feelings toward him.

As if he were a puppet simply being tugged by his strings, I heard Lee's once slumped body rise on shaking feet and stand erect behind me. I stammered for a few seconds as I turned back to face him in frenzy, my mind in profound shock from his supposedly enervated body being able to stand.

"L-lee?" I asked, my quiet voice showing a thing line of hope.

My hand rose and tentatively touched his cheek, the tips of my fingers wanting desperately to caress it.

"S…S-sakura…get….get away." Was the only thing he managed to say before the unthinkable happened once more.

His parallel arms began to shake, eyes that once stared dully at me were now tightly closed as he had a migraine. I panicked and began to shake him furiously in vain.

"Boy. Obey your dear father and dispose of the girl, but please try to keep her organs intact. He said in a haughty voice, wringing Sai's ink away with a simple twist of his arms.

"_What_?" I muttered, apparently baffled from the bizarre orders I had heard.

There was little time to think, however, as I felt a flesh numbing force envelope the entire right side of my face. Liquid warmth exploded from my mouth as I landed on the harsh floor from the sheer power of the force. My tongue swirled with iron and spit, my lungs surrendered their oxygen, and I was left to witness Lee with an outstretched crimsoned fist. A whimper

"You do realize it would be better to simply join me Sakura? You will not escape." His father muttered.

"Shut…up." A weary groan could be heard through the poorly lit room.

"My how the Hyuga clan is filled with imprudent mutts." The professor hissed as he continued to be suppressed by Sai's feline like fiends. "_What_ sedative will work on you?"

Rather than waste my time arguing with this insane man, I ran towards Lee, my hands touching his rigid body for the first time in weeks.

"DO NOT TOUCH ME!" Lee screeched as though in shame, burying his face against the floor to shun himself away from me.

"Lee, stop it! Don't let him win!" I yelled as I grabbed his hands and unlocked the metal holding him prisoner.

This did nothing for Lee even after I helped him up. His face remained bereft of emotion, listless eyes staring at nothing in particular, and hands resting limply at his sides. He was dead to the world. So long as his father lay sprawled on the floor staring up at him, he would not budge from the sheer terror he held toward that man.

"My dear, you of all people can appreciate the sheer beauty of science. Behold the perfect prototype!" the depraved man motioned to Lee. "My drugs have controlled the central nervous system! We can now even control someone's very will and make them follow missions to the letter!"

"You…you…YOU BASTARD! YOU SICK CRAZY BASTARD!" I screamed back at the man, oblivious to Lee's struggling form in front of me.

"Lee…this woman…she will someday eat you alive you know. She's a highly volatile and outspoken person who won't hesitate to hurt you. I wonder if you're aware of this?" he had the gall to speak to him even in his state.

"…I am…" my lover muttered to my dismay, his hands trembling uncontrollably as he tried to keep them in place.

"Then why do you persist in keeping these painful bonds?"

"Because…because they are all I have." He whimpered, his eyes traveling wildly across the room, stopping momentarily to look at me.

They were of desperation, fear, a feral confusion that supplicated with me to end it, but there was something else in those sleepless blood shot eyes of his.

_Shame. _

"So you are merely _conforming_ to your circumstances?"

Lee's bottom lip quivered as he turned his head and stared into his father's piercing eyes, eyes that were completely apathetic to his survival or death.

"N-no….I…no…"

"Then obey your own flesh and blood and help me! These people do not care about you! You do not even care about _yourself_!"

"SHUT…UP! You…you think you _know_ Lee? YOU HAVE NO IDEA WHAT HE'S CAPABLE OF!" Neji now screamed with a revitalized voice as his body began to once again pull frantically at his chains.

Again, Lee seemed unmoved by this. He dared not speak.

"Come on Lee! What happened to the hot-blooded fool I used to know!? What happened to the idiot who was always protecting his comrades!?" his best friend tried to motivate him in vain.

"Don't listen to them my son! They are merely trying to manipulate you and-"

"Father why do you do this to me!?" he screamed, his head hanging, staring at nothing but the floor.

Bloodied fists clenched tightly by his sides, no doubt from the attempt to block out his father's orders.

_'Good...he's fighting the drugs.'_ I concluded with an inward sigh.

"Lee..." I whispered as I took hold of both his reddening fists. "You're _stronger _than this. Fight it."

"I...I...I am trying." he uttered, his eyes now shut from the unbearable urge to cause harm.

"Boy! Do not defy me! Stop them and I will forgive you for everything you have done!" he bribed with a malicious smile.

Lee's eyes opened like those of a praying monk who had found enlightenment when he heard those words. But surely he knew it was all a fabricated promise meant to delude him?

"No father! Please do not make me do it!" Lee begged desperately as both hands cradled his head, mouth clenching tightly with each syllable. Blood seeped past his closed lips, his teeth apparently biting down to try to stop the urge to accept the drugs into his system.

At times I could not comprehend his perdurable loyalty to such a man.

"Lee, do as I command you! Before-" his mouth was silenced with a wad of ink as it was shoved down his throat with a simple motion by Sai's jutsu.

"For a grown man, you certainly lie more than-OOF!" Sai grunted breathlessly as Lee's blurred image was seen pushing him to the side with a horizontal kick.

Unfortunately Lee's inhuman speed would be our downfall if we did not stop him or neutralized the drug his father had administered.

"LEE! STOP IT!" Neji now screamed at his best friend. "FIGHT IT YOU COWARD!"

His pleadings were lost in Lee's ears, now only accepting orders from his father.

The impact of the kick had sent Sai's entire body crashing against the wall, whatever tubes of ink he carried around his waist had cracked and were spilling its contents on the floor. My lover had not stopped there, he grabbed hold of Sai's neck before the realization of the kick had even rushed into his mind. Making note to separate him from the oozing ink, Lee's flung my teammate's body accross the other end of the room, barely missing an unconscious Tenten by mere inches. His father was now free of the ink shackles Sai had furtively wrapped around him. He gave me a cocky smirk as he ripped the black cords off him.

"Tell me my dear...would you rather my son finish you off? Or be spared the pain and be killed by me?" he asked.

"I'll take you on myself!" I yelled at him as I foolishly charged head first at him with a chakra infused punch. "You're not controlling Lee anymore!"

He easily blocked my pathetic and enervated charge with a move to the side. "Oh, but I am not my dear. I am afraid he is doing this of his own free will." he answered as he grabbed a handful of my hair to pull me back and used my momentum to land a ground breaking knee kick to my lumbar region.

I heard a deafening crack. I shut my eyes in pain. No time for pain. Pain was a luxury I could not have. It was nothing compared to what I was feeling because of Lee.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw Sai in the midsts of anguish as he tried to recover from the shock of another one of Lee's jaw breaking jabs. Spit exploded from the ROOT member's mouth as he slammed his fist into his pale stomach.

_'No good...Sai will die if he takes anymore of those beatings.' _I thought frantically, noticing my friend could hardly keep up with Lee's alacrity.

"Sai…I…I…" Lee released a glass shattering scream as he grabbed his head again and fell on his knees.

"Lee, you can stop. I think I will have fun with this boy first." the professor commanded as he eschewed my presence, walked leisurely over to the battling couple, and dragged Sai back to his feet with a brusque tug on the back of his shirt. "There is something about you I simply detest. What is it about you that not even my drugs could change?"

"D-drugs?" I gagged back air as I fought to regain my balance.

"They won't work on me…" Sai grumbled as he coughed a bit of blood, "my training…included becoming immune to poisons and viruses…"

"Oh, but that is not all you little fool. I sense there is more to it that simple training." The man said as he grabbed my friend's chin with a thumb and index finger, studying him as though he were a dog in a veterinarian's office. His attention then moved to an unconscious Tenten still resting and strapped against a dissecting board. "Who is it that makes you this way?"

"I must…protect…my friends…" was his terse answer through a gurgling blood filled mouth.

The scientist chuckled dryly at his response, releasing his hold on Sai's chin rather harshly. "I never thought I'd hear a ROOT member babble on about human sentimentalities…you _master_ must be getting soft, or probably senile."

Before his grip around Sai's neck broke his trachea, the man threw him back to the floor with a hollow echoing slap.

"It would appear as though you have no ink ROOTS member," the twisted scientist said to my friend with a knowing smirk as he snapped his fingers and motioned Lee to finish me off. "therefore you have lost your forte and you have lost the fight." He added as he pushed Sai to the side with a swing of his foot.

The broken glass from his ink tubes cracked as his hands reached blindly for an intact one. He was right, he was out of ink. Sai, could say nothing in return, no witty remark, no burning allegation, no courageous speech. All he could do was continue to lay on all fours gasping in pain and wondering what to do next. Noticing the man was looking down at him as though he were already the victor, he gave him his habitual smile despite being seconds away from being killed.

"Of course I do." He said, quickly pulling a kunai from his pouch. "I have all the ink I could ever want."

"SAI!" I screamed, sensing the fearless and desperate tone in his voice.

With that chilling smile, the boy shoved the sharp edge of the knife through his stomach, allowing a pool of his blood to spout out into the floor freely and rapidly. He let out a grunt as his eyes shut close for a second of pained realization. The sensation was short-lived, however, since he forced open his eyes again to reach inside his vest for a brush with a trembling hand. Breathing heavily, he managed to unwind a scroll, letting blood stain its white canvas.

Lee's listless eyes seemed to widen a bit from the rash action, but his body showed no signs of slowing down or mitigating his beating as he walked rigidly toward me.

"SAI! GRAB HOLD OF HIM!" Neji yelled as he continued to struggle in vain through the chakra consuming chains.

I heard the boy hiss in pain as he narrowly dodged another one of the father's vertical kicks.

"Blood flush jutsu!" he mumbled, his already pale face now appearing even less lively as he clutched his pouring crimson stomach.

All at once, red snakes enveloped the man from the ground, grabbing hold of his arms and legs to prevent any mobility.

My boyfriend stopped as his hand was inches away from my throat. The sudden course of action had caused some sense to stir up in his mind as he finally realized what he had caused Sai to do.

"Sak..Sakura...use...use the sedatives..." the martial artist supplicated with me. "I...I fear...I cannot stop myself..."

"S-sedatives? W-wh-where?" I asked with shallow breaths, my head frantically looking around the lab.

"...Things...next to...Neji...blue injections...please." he cried as he fought against the maddening drug in his system.

"R-right..." I responded shakily.

"You FOOLS! No sedatives will work on him! I have fused enough adrenaline in my drugs to keep him active for 19 straight hours!" his father yelled in self satisfaction. "It makes the perfect obedient soldier! That's the beauty of my shots!"

This time the crimson infused jutsu did not fail in keeping Lee's father quiet as it shoved it's metallic substance inside his mouth, gagging him and silencing his tirades.

I looked at the man in front of me, his eyes in the midsts of a constant struggle between his sense of morality and the will shattering drug. His hand shook as though it were cold on its way to my neck, but seemed to rest there as both skins created contact. My breaths were laced with anticipation and paranoia, mind turning wild over all the possible scenarios. Lee's eyes met with my own, peering into me, asking-_begging _for any morsel of help. I could provide him with none, my tongue seemed numb with fear, my limbs moving randomly to reach for his face. The tip of my right index finger touched that dirty, unshaven, and bloodied cheek carefully, its stubles feeling like sandpaper against my skin. His unruly hair followed as my other hand dug into those knotted locks and rested against his scalp. My hand slowly joined my finger to caress that now bruised and maltreated face I had grown to adore as time and emotions progressed.

"Fight it Lee." I stated with no trace of my earlier hesitation.

"I-I...I a-am t-tr-trying..." he stammered back, his hand still clutching my neck with a docile force.

"Don't let your father, that MONSTER, control you. You have the strongest will of any person I know." I cheered quietly with a smile. "Something as stupid as a drug can't possibly detain a man like you."

Lee's chest rose heavily as his dry beaten lips inhaled frantically to control himself. His throat released something resembling a pule, but quickly turned to an enervated grunt while he forced his hand away from my throat and slid it accross my shoulder. He leaned against my touch, yearning for the affection like a starved urchin accepted nourishment. Tension lingered stubbornly in the air, never allowing me to fully relax until his head collapsed limply against my neck, his hot labored breath touching my skin. His shoulder slumped and his body gave in under his weight as he leaned his entire being into my chest. I garnered what pitiful strength those chakra depleting chains had left me and used it to soften our fall as I wrapped my arms around his torso and held him close to my rapidly beating heart.

"It's okay Lee...good job...you...you did it." I susurrated into his ear, earning a tiny exhausted smile from Lee as he burrowed into my warmth. "...Good...job."

Still not letting my guard down, I flinched once I heard footsteps coming toward me. I pressed Lee protectively against me, yet kept my gaze on my surroundings. The sound of chains dropping to the ground and belts unfastening reached my ears, my eyes fixated on Sai as he quickly ran to Tenten's form and ripped off the binding materials around her. Despite his open abdomen still saturated with flowing blood, pain was not evident in his face. The only times he grunted was out of frustration when a stubborn rope would not come undone.

"Tenten? Tenten can you hear me?" he asked once the girl was free. Red hands softly shook her head for any signs of reaction, followed by a low whimper from her.

"Mm." my best friend mumbled back to assure us of her safety.

His once widened eyes returned to their usual almond shapes as he heard this, no doubt his way of showing his unmitigated relief.

"S...Sai?" her voice was barely audible.

Sai did not hear her, or if he did he gave no signs of answering. As soon as he had received confirmation on her health, he left her side, if only momentarily, to release Neji from the tangled chains around his body.

"Can you walk?" he asked tonelessly as the Hyuga tried to balance himself.

"How's Tenten?" he inquired back, acting as though his state was irrelavent.

"She seems to be regaining conscious-"

Neji pushed his comrade out of the way as he made his way quickly toward her to see for himself.

"Tenten? Are you all right?" His voice was dripping with worry as he helped her sit up, providing support as her still limp head landed accross his chest.

"N-...Neji?...Yeah...I think I'm..." Her sentence went unfinished as sleep claimed her once again.

The kunoichi's team leader stared at her slumbering form with his only visible eye, a softness I had never seen before glowing in that left orb. Sai stood behind the two, still clutching his stomach which showed no signs of healing. Had he not been bleeding to death, had I not been holding Lee's quivering body for all the wrong reasons, had Tenten been in Neji's grasp simply because he wanted it so, had that monster not been struggling for his pathetic life...I would not have pushed away the curious thought that came into my mind. Did Sai feel left out as his eyes traveled to Lee and me and back to the couple in front of him?

"Sai." Neji called him out before throwing a small pouch at him, his attention never leaving Tenten. "Eat these...they thicken the blood and help with clotting."

"Thank you..." he uttered before consuming several of the pills inside Neji had offered. "Can you walk?" he repeated as if he had not witnessed the Hyuga's running toward Tenten.

"I can manage." he responded raggedly. "My chakra is depleted...but I'm still strong enough to carry Tenten out of here."

"Hn." Sai supported his weight against a crumbling wall, rasping for breath as he looked at her through half opened drowsy eyes.

The blood loss was getting to him.

"We need to get that thing stitched up. _NOW_." I ordered, "Sai, come over here so I can at least close the wound."

My teammate shook his head. "I can do that myself. Tend to the rest first...you don't have much chakra to spare, so use it on them." His selflessness seemed incredulous considering the state he was in, trembling legs took him to some metal cabinets by the edge of the room. "Let's use what we can here, there seems to be an exhaustive collection of medical supplies."

"I still have enough chakra to heal you Sai." I urged, trying to suppress a mixture of lament and surprise at his answer.

"I've been healing my own wounds up until I got assigned to your team, I'll be fine."

"...O-okay..."

Helping Lee to his feet and gathering what I needed, I began to patch up the various cuts and bruises littered accross the bodies of each of my friends, all the while stealing a glance at Sai. He treated his wounds much like he would prepare a slab of meat, the miniscule signs of discomfort rarely shown on his face. Eyebrows twitched or a slight grimace surfaced, but nothing above a low hiss was heard as Sai slathered his dirty stomach with what I believed was ethanol alcohol and iodine. The antiseptic reeked and burned my nostrils even from my distance. Searching hands finally found a needle and bunsen burner amongst the professor's belongings as he prepared. After repeatedly striking the flint to produce a spark, Sai heated the thick needle over the burning methane, staring at it nonchalantly as if it was not going to pierce through his ripped skin in a matter of seconds. Inured to the sight of blood and carnage did little, if anything, to lessen the pity I felt for him at that moment.

His adroit hands made me wonder how many times he done this himself. How often after a battle, after a mission, had he been alone in his room treating wounds like these? Like a dog that prefers to lick his injuries in painful solitude, how many times had he been left bleeding without so much as a word of comfort from his "master"?

"Sakura...check Tenten, the professor probably only injected some heavy sedatives, but take a blood sample just in case he made another one of his cocktails." Sai requested as he tied some thread through the now orange glowing needle and began to sew his flesh and torn skin together. He then looked over to the captured father still struggling to break free as screams were muffled by the bloody gag. "My jutsu won't hold him forever...whatever he gave Tenten, make sure you return the favor."

"R-right..." I concurred, resting my teammates against dissecting tables as I ran the sample and took several shots of the sedatives to the bastard. He groaned in protest, cursing every word he knew at me while I pierced the sensitive skin around his neck for access. A heavy sense of satisfaction overwhelmed me as his frightening eyes finally closed and his numb body fell to the floor.

Sai finished, wrapping some clean bandages around his waist before walking over to me.

"Let's go."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

It was nearing night fall once we reached our cave in that merciless tundra. The meager rays of daily sunlight were gratefully accepted after having spent so long in that hellish darkness. My tired legs could take Lee and me no further, my team fared no better. Neji had already prepared a sleeping bag for Tenten, his eyes yearning for rest as he tried to fight off heavy eyelids and a nodding head. Sai had managed to drag Lee's father back us while wrapped around his own chakra depleting chains to prevent any possibilities of escape. With our wounds treated, our bodies (relatively) clean, and exhaustion beating the whines of our empty stomachs, we crawled to our respective spots inside the cave, searching for warmth around a hastily created pathetic fire. Lee had not spoken once once we had left the laboratory, opting instead to focus on keeping conscious so the ice would not claim him. His lips shivered, but that did not stop his chivalrous attitude from covering me with his chunnin jacket. I refused the offer, but he still dropped it over my shoulders as he positioned my head under his chin and wrapped an arm around me for warmth.

I closed my eyes for what I thought was a second and was woken up by someone stirring in the cave.

"Were you awake this whole time?" Neji's voice asked brusquely.

I peered out of the protection of Lee's jacket to realize it was already sunrise and that Lee was no where near me.

The once long haired ninja scrambled to his feet as if to prove to the man in front of him he did not require rest either. Sai's sitting figure was erect, dark baggy eyes completely aware of all his surroundings. He seemed to be making a new batch of ink using melted snow and the innards of the sparsely scattered plants and insects in the region.

"All ROOT members have undergone sleep deprivation training. It's basic." he replied dryly, his blank face somehow irking the Hyuga.

"Where's Tenten?" Neji quickly changed the subject in a panic once he saw the sleeping bag was empty.

"Out." he tore a beetle in half to attain the black jelly within it.

"And you let her _go_?!" I had never heard that tone come out of Neji. His usual reserved and logical self had been taken over by brief periods of anger and antagonizing.

"Why not?" He smashed a weed with a rock. "Should I have told her she needed to _sleep _more? The best thing she can do right now is move-"

This, apparently, ticked something off on Neji as he allowed no time for the recommendation to be finished and rammed Sai against the cave wall.

"You...don't give me that _shit_! You don't know _anything _about her so stop telling me what is best for her." he growled before releasing the stoic ROOT member back to the floor.

His dearth of reactions only seemed to fuel Neji's already infuriated state.

Startled, I shook away the jacket around me and jolted to where both men were staring each other down.

"Both of you, STOP. What's gotten into you?" I reprimanded as though separating two quarreling boys at the school yard.

"Lee is with her..." Sai added evenly, "did you think I would let her leave alone?"

The Hyuga spared no words for my teammate. Tension so obvious it was almost visible possessed the cave, leaving me to wonder what the hell was wrong with both of them. Sai returned to his ink, leaving a rather pissed off Neji to turn his back to us and walk away, brushing his shoulder against mine as he passed me. I scoffed at his sudden lack of manners, but opted to follow him since I wanted to see how Tenten and Lee were doing.

"Has he woken up?" I asked on my way out, motioning to a still drugged professor lying by the floor.

Sai placed a cap on a tube of fresh ink, looked at me, and popped it in place. "Once."

"And?"

"I gave him another sedative." He hid the tube inside his jacket's breast pocket.

"Good."

"I gathered what shots I could find. I don't have that many left to keep him quiet for long."

"We'll just find other means then." I said with a smirk as I exited the cave.

Ice crunched beneath my feet, snow that looked light as baby powder surrounded me as I sighed and saw my breath. Wrapping my jacket tighter around me, I took a few steps to find Neji standing in front of two figures sitting down. Tenten's cheeks and nose were a fiery red and resembled cherries as I made my way toward her. Wide and fully awake brown eyes rose to greet me and a smile was aimed my way. I smiled in return and ran towards her, nearly knocking both of us in the snow as I crushed her with a hug. My arms trapped her in a fierce embrace, one that tried to communicate all my desperation, relief, and happiness from knowing she was safe. Lee sat next to her, as silent and as broken as last night.

"Tenten...I'm...I'm glad you're okay." I mumbled as her shoulder crushed my lips from the hug.

"I'm glad you're here...thank you Sakura..." she mumbled back. "We all would have...we would've been..."

"Don't say that. You're safe now, that's all I care about."

I pushed away the possible scenarios that could have happened had Sai and I not intervened.

"You make it sound like _Tenten _isyour lover." I heard Lee joke behind me.

His voice, however, lacked that usual luster that he often used whenever he teased me (especially when it came to my relationship with Tenten). It sounded tired beyond cure and raspy beyond recognition. I turned my attention to him, seeing him sitting on a stump of snow that looked man built. Bandages and gauze covered most of his face and neck, not including the rest of his body. There was no reason to expect he would greet me with a hug or even a smile, but he did despite my assumptions. I cringed when sharp iodine filled my olfactory senses. True, I had cleaned my team with the only disinfectant I had managed to find, but I did not expect it to linger even now. Lee's smile disappeared and he released me when he noticed my discomfort.

"Sorry...it's just..."

"It is all right."

"NO. It _isn't_! It's not you. That smell just reminded me of...things." I admitted, albeit reluctantly.

"You mean it reminds you of my father." he corrected as he raised the back of his battered hand to his nose and inhaled. "It does smell of him."

"Lee..."

"Do not sedate him again...I wish to speak with him once he wakes up."

"Are...are you sure?" I asked, surprised with his sudden change in conviction.

He nodded and looked at his best friend still standing motionless in front of us.

"That is a good look for you." he called out, noticing Neji's freshly cut hair.

His teammate crossed his arms, stuffing his hands into the sleeves of his robe while he glared at him in return.

It was Tenten's turn to look at him.

"Neji? Is that you? I didn't even recognize you with your hair like that!" she exclaimed as she ran towards him. "It looks...different...nice even." she cocked her head to the side in curiosity.

He stiffened even more and frowned. "I beg to differ."

"Well I can always cut off the uneven parts to-OH MY GOD NEJI WHAT HAPPENED TO YOUR EYE!?" she exploded as she barely realized his right eye was hidden behind some gauze.

Her hand automatically shot up to touch the side of the bandage before Neji moved out of the contact.

"It's fine...it still works..."

"But-!"

"It's _fine_."

"I'm sorry!" she cried.

"What?"

"I'm sorry! If I hadn't of-"

"Forget it."

"No! I-"

"There's no need to apologize. You didn't do anything wrong."

"I was weak when I needed to be strong!"

Neji paused for a moment, contemplating her words before he chuckled. "No Tenten. Why I did certain things, you already know the reason."

"I..." she stared at the floor, her teeth chewing at her lower lip in worry.

"Now then...you say my hair is uneven?" he asked, raising a hand to run his fingers through his short hair.

"Yeah...I can cut the rest for you...if you want."

"Don't accept the offer Neji! She's only cut dog hair before!" I warned, remembering a night long ago.

He looked over at me and cocked an eyebrow in return, probably wondering where I had gotten that bit of information.

For a moment it appeared as if yesterday's nightmarish ordeal had never occurred, in fact I was beginning to think it had been just that, a nightmare. A nightmare that could not harm me any more than powdery snow.

"Thank you."

Lee's deep voice made me jump as I turned my attention back to him. Both Neji and Tenten had decided to head back to the cave to restyle the unintentional haircut, leaving both of us to face the cold harsh reality of what had truly happened between us.

"Oh...for what?"

"For...everything. Without you I fear I would have killed my teammates, if my father did not do it before me."

"You were strong enough to resist."

"I was not last time he injected me with that. You saw for yourself."

"But you adapted, that's what makes you stronger." I urged, trying to push the memory of our apartment encounter to the far reaches of my mind.

"I suppose you are right."

"So what now?"

"We take him back to Konoha, charge him for his crimes, then...I will try to forget about him."

"You will."

"No, I do not think so. He will probably always remain in my memories..."

We returned to the cave to find a rather different looking Neji staring in silent horror at the pieces of hair Tenten had chopped off with her kunai. Sai sat quietly in a corner, painting something with oil pastels.

"Neji...you no longer resemble a woman. Good job Tenten." Lee continued to tease his teammate to no end.

"Oh...wow...Neji...you look..."

"Horrible?"

"I was going to say handsome." I blurted out regardless of how Lee would look at me later.

It was true. This shorter cut had left his hair looking more stylish, more...masculine. Hair stuck out in the back of his head, giving him that sasuke-esque look whenever he glared at me.

"Looks nice huh?" Tenten chirped, "It was time for a change anyway, you've had that same style since-"

"Since I was _born_. It's a Hyuga clan custom Tenten, not a fashion statement." he corrected.

"Well, whatever it was, Sakura is right. You look more handsome this way." She said as she cut off the remaining protruding slivers of hair.

Neji form stiffened as he sat on his makeshift rock chair. I had no way of knowing if the comment had stirred any positive stimuli in the man, but even _I_ knew a male did not let a woman with no experience cut his hair unless he trusted her completely.

"I can't thank you enough for finding us Sakura…had it not been for Lady Tsunade sending you guys-"

"Well…we should really thank Sai. He's the reason we found you so quickly." I added, albeit uneasily as I saw Neji's form tense and eye narrow.

"Sai?"

"He said the process of searching for your team was facilitated by the ink you have. His ink creations sought that out." I explained, again feeling the man's stern looks directed my way.

"Oh, _this_? Seriously?" she asked as she pulled something out of her shirt that looked like a tiny piece of hollowed glass filled with ink. It seemed she had made a necklace out of it.

"You gave her a _tracking_ device?" Neji scoffed incredulously.

"It was meant to be a gift, the fact that I could trace Tenten with it was purely impromptu, however fortunate." The pale boy answered, his eyes never meeting the Hyuga's.

"It's true, without it who knows what would have happened to us…" Tenten agreed, wiping her kunai clean of any bits of hair. She stood up to walk over to the ninja currently being an artist. "Thank you…Sai."

He said nothing in return, merely gave her an acknowledging nod, and got back to his painting.

"Looks like he's trying to play the role of the silent hero." I teased, noting Sai, while awkward, was never one to be the quiet type.

"Sai, you're such a dork." Tenten teased, crouching down next to him and giving him a playful sock to the stomach.

As anyone who had been conscious enough to witness the stitching of Sai's flesh would expect, he released a rather loud grunt of pain as her fist made hard contact with the tender wound.

"Sai? You all right? I didn't hit you THAT hard." Tenten said, still oblivious to why her friend was crouched over and holding his gut.

"Apparently you did. Mr. Hero here managed to save our asses by using a very unique jutsu."

"I ran out of ink." He stated rather bluntly to save me the trouble of explaining, his face grim as he turned to look at me.

"Why didn't you tell me so I would know not to hurt you!?" Tenten berated.

"Pain only hurts you if you let it. It's all mental." He said, taking a deep breath only to exhale said pain.

"Who taught you that crap?!"

"It's simple ROOT training."

"I'm not being _literal_! You need to take some pain killers!" she exclaimed as she kept her distance from the boy.

"I have enough chakra now…it'll heal faster with some of my jutsu." I offered, going deeper into the cave to set up a small tent for the procedure. "I'll start with you and then give everyone else check ups."

"S-sure."

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

I was barely done building the tent when I noticed Sai was beginning to pull out the thread keeping his skin together with a pathetic amount of delicacy.

"You idiot…why are you doing that? You've already lost enough blood as it is!" Tenten castigated her comrade as soon as she entered the room with a pail of heated water.

"If Sakura is going to close the wound anyway, then there's no need for thread." He said as if seeing his skin once again being ripped in half had a trivial effect on him.

"At least take them off _carefully_!" my friend worried over Sai's slightly masochistic behavior.

I rolled my eyes as I washed my hands with a bit of the water. "He's not going to listen, he's as stubborn as Naruto and as apathetic as Sasuke."

"Then he just needs someone to teach him to take better care of his body!" Tenten reasoned as she shooed away Sai's uncaring hands and began to slowly take out the thread with my tools. "And to teach him not to do dumb things like that."

"I must save my friends first." He replied, one eye quickly closing as he cringed in discomfort from Tenten's actions.

"Friends are important, but _we_ care about you too!" she said, her voice nearing the verge of displeasure.

"It was the only option." he mumbled, staring blankly at her hands as they undid the thread.

"There are _always_ more options!" she bit back, her voice growing.

"My options were to improvise or admit defeat. Losing was not an option for me." For every time Sai's voice became lower and softer, Tenten's only evolved into twice the volume.

"But at the cost of losing your _own_ life?! Think about the stupid things you're _saying_!"

"That's a factor I took into consideration."

"And yet you still DID IT!" she exclaimed.

"Yes, because the outcome won over the means."

"So, if you had died....it wouldn't of mattered so long as WE were okay?"

"...Correct."

By this time I was beginning to feel discomfitted by the sudden fight erupting between the two.

"And what about US? _Huh_!? How am WE supposed to live with _that_?!" she finally yelled.

"A ninja's duty is to die in battle for his comrades...it's our lot in life."

"I think that's selfishness...you're a very selfish person, you know that?" she spat out.

"Tenten…you are…a very good friend." he stated, sounding somewhat unsure of his use of words.

"Y-you d-don't do that for a friend! No matter _how_ good of a friend they are!" she stammered, her crimson face a medley of fury, frustration, and grief from not being able to get through to him.

A few whimpers escaped her mouth, yet she could not bring herself to shed tears in front of someone she admired, not when he had recklessly risked his life for her and would be ready to do it numerous times. Sai smiled in return, his hand tightly clutching the side of his injured stomach as though hiding the wound would dissipate Tenten's ferocity over the matter. His pale hands shook with each syllable she threw at him, with each admonishment he received, each glare and growing broken down sobs she threw at him. He would tear open more skin if he gripped any harder.

"Comrades are more important than the miss-"

"_YOU_! OF _ALL_ PEOPLE! _YOU_ SHOULD KNOW! DON'T EVER DO SOMETHING AS STUPID AS THAT!" she wildly reprimanded as she took her forehead in her hands and rocked it back and forth as though trying to understand his logic.

"Naruto taught me one should save a frie-"

"FORGET ABOUT THAT IDIOT! _HE'S_ NOT THE ONE DYING RIGHT NOW!" she screeched as she threw her fists unto the sleeping bag Sai was sitting on.

"But I am not dy-"

"Sai…you have to start thinking about yourself. You…y-you can't just throw your life away for anybody." She mumbled wearily, her palms continuously rubbing against her eyes to rip away any sense of emotion.

"If I cannot risk my life for my friends, then I will never be able to save them."

"I!-….i-it was _my_ fault for getting trapped!" she retorted, her once pale face imbued with rage. "What were you even _thinking_!?"

"…I wasn't. I just did whatever seemed logical at the time."

"…You're an…idiot."

Sai didn't seem to have an answer for her insult, he seemed more interested in the tiny trails of blood seeping from his wound now that the cut was open again.

"I…I'm sorry…I shouldn't have…I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings." she blurted out, realizing the name might've been a bit uncalled for.

"Don't worry…I don't have any." He replied stoically.

"Yes you do!"

"Sakura is right Tenten. I may never be accustomed to the concept of having any type of emotion, no matter how much I read."

"Yes you can!" her voice drowned out his own. "No matter how hard you try you can never kill the humanity inside of you! You feel loneliness! You feel fear! You feel bliss! You feel PAIN damn it!" she yelled as she came to Sai's level and pointed at his slashed belly. "Don't you DARE tell me otherwise!"

At this he said nothing as he stared at Tenten's face about a foot apart from his own. His hand had relaxed and was currently rubbing his wound in soothing circles, but it was nothing where one could assume a reaction. Pretending to busy myself, I (_quickly) _closed his gash with my jutsu while ignoring the bizarre moment, muttered something about needing more warm water as I grabbed a metal canteen, and excused myself from the room. Judging from their prior fight and their eyes staring intently, orbs unmoving and unblinking as though they were challenging each other, it was obvious they were completely oblivious to me. I could have yelled out that I was pregnant and I doubt they would have reacted.

Grateful to finally be out of the tent for a few minutes, I sighed and wondered how high I would need to hike to get _liquid _water without having to melt it first. If only my mind had been satisfied with the task at hand, it would not have returned to my bickering friend still inside the tent. Her voice had been completely silenced, a notion I thought was far too suspicious to ignore. Within _seconds_ of being outside, curiosity and idle time began to overthrow whatever miniscule will power and prudency I had within me.

'_Well…perhaps Sai opened his wounds again…I should at least peek inside to make sure he's okay._' I concealed my perverse intentions with virtuous ones.

True to my word, I crept back into the tent, looking for a sliver of the fabric to be open enough for one spying eye.

Both were still in the exact position I had seen when I had awkwardly left. Sai's hand did nothing but massage the now clean and closed injury and Tenten was currently staring him down as she placed herself in front of him on the sleeping bag. It was only when the idiot _continued_ to stare back at her that I noticed some movement. It seemed Tenten's patience had disappeared.

She released a guttural sound that resembled a sigh of frustration or a growl as she quickly leaned in the rest of the way to close the gap between them.

The action that occurred was rather...._aggressive. _

Wow.

Even _my_ first kiss with Lee wasn't this…_virulent_.

Her lips crashed against his unsuspecting ones with a rapid, merciless, pounding force that probably shocked his whole system into submission. Eyes that would only stare unreceptively at anyone were now wide with what I assumed was terror, astonishment, and perplexity. His hand had completely deserted his stomach, it now rested uselessly at his side as Tenten maintained the brutal kiss.

She managed to finally tear away to find him still staring blankly at her, a bewildered look plastered on his face.

"Sai…I…I really care for you." she panted.

He blinked, mind not processing what his body had just experienced.

"I would advise you against such an emotion." He muttered, his hand going back to rub his abdomen.

"Why? Can't I have feelings for whoever I want?"

"I cannot even begin to comprehend what that means."

"Yes you can. You're not stupid Sai."

"You are fond of someone who merely _copies_ his environment. Someone who doesn't do something unless it is dictated by a book."

"Sai…"

"'Sai'?" he repeated with a smile. "That is not even my real name."

"You think I _care_ about that?" Tenten deprecated. "Your _name_ doesn't define who you are! You are still the same person no matter _what_ you are called!"

"You are free to say what you will. I still lack the capacity to understand, just ask Neji."

Equanimity and propriety were thrown into oblivion as Tenten jerked the wounded ninja by the neck of his shirt and peered into him.

"Don't belittle yourself and don't define yourself based on what others think of you. I can't stand it and it's not like you." She seethed. "Don't pretend like you can't feel anything. I know you do. _You_ know you do. You know and it scares you. That's why…even after years of interacting with people, you still want to pretend like you're some mindless doll to be used by someone. You're just afraid…"

With hesitant fingers the boy touched his once wan lips, now with the nuance of color and health from its recent "use".

There was nothing between them after the bizarre kiss. All that dared to linger were ineffable apologies and empty glares courtesy of Tenten as she exited the tent.

She did not even acknowledge the fact that I was right outside the tent.

_'Wow...'_

OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

The freezing day drove on at a painfully dawdling speed, gnawing at our stomachs from the dearth of rations (which we had ravished shortly after Neji's hair cut). Why I had rushed to the mission with a surplus of weapons but not enough victuals was now a stupid question. Sai, ever the suddenly selfless hero, had gone out to hunt whatever scarce species of rodents the tundra had to offer. He did succeed, however, when he brought back two twitching bloodied rabbits hanging from his hands. Lee's father lied a great distance away from us, albeit were we could still see him. We ate in silence around the fire, each of us keeping our distance. Tenten sat by me, intermittently leaning against my back to avoid Sai's equally occasional glances. Neji would take no part in supper, preferring to meditate in a corner.

And Lee…

Well Lee sat in front of his father, waiting patiently until he stirred from his drug induced sleep.

A few drowsy groans from the professor alerted us as we dropped our food and rushed toward Lee. The man held the signs of mid consciousness as he complained in his sleep, eyes fighting to open.

"I am going to take the gag off him." His son stated, his voice confident and unyielding.

With unwavering fingers he untied the clothing hindering his father's ability to spew his stupidities. Again, the man showed trifling signs of waking up.

He cleared his throat, bidding his time until the older man woke up and the confrontation began. "Father?" he asked, his voice sounding less courageous than he would have wished.

His hand reached toward his father, resting furtively on his shoulder before a rough movement shoved the affection off the body.

"Do not _touch_ me." A half awakened professor warned.

"I apologize father." A suddenly meek Lee mumbled as he bent his knees and sat down in front of him.

The somnolent professor glared at him with such animosity it was a wonder how they could be related at all. Both men sat in tactless immobility and silence, son unsure of what to say and father probably wishing he had killed him when he had the chance. We stared intently at the two as we stood a few feet away from the unfolding scene, never having the effrontery to rudely observe their conversation at close range. Several moments passed before Lee realized he would have to break the stillness himself and speak.

"…_why_…father?" he managed to blurt out.

His father's eyes remained unchanged as he was asked this. A smirk tugged at his lips.

"It's all in the name of science Lee. People test on animals, you are no different." He laughed and placed his tied hands on Lee's head as though he were a pet.

Lee showed no signs of rebuffing the contact.

"…I…"

"You were never of much use. Your genes were…shall we say, 'substandard'?" he continued as if he were reading off a list. "You could do neither genjutsu nor ninjutsu. I am afraid you were simply taking up space."

Lee shook from the biting remarks, but managed to keep his voice in check.

"But…_why_?" he asked again, looking desolately at his father's sneering form. "Why did you do this?"

"Well, my lovely son, I have told you time and time again yet your idiotic mind just does not want to hear the true. That is why you were always a disappointment to me. You never made any progress, to me you were just this inferior specimen that needed to be euthanized. Even now you wish you did not live, correct?"

"…Yes…"

The man's bloodied lips crawled to an impious smile as he stared up at his son through reddened eyes.

"But…that could not have been the only reason father." Lee again began in vain to find logic in this antipathy. "Tell me why! Is there something that I did wrong to displease you? Why?"

"_Why_? You would like to know '_why'_?!" he practically laughed. "Because you took EVERYTHING away from me the moment you came into this HORRIBLE world!" he spat.

"I loved you Father…I wanted nothing but to try to make you proud." Lee reasoned as his head lowered in shame next to the man.

"_PROUD_!? You KILLED my wife with your damn _birth_! You _KILLED_ the only woman who understood me! You damn well _KILLED ME_ each time I had to look at the very-THE VERY _THING _that took everything away from me!" the man screamed into Lee's softened face, writhing in agony with each blood gargled syllable he pronounced.

"Father I-" tears were beginning to prickle at the poor boy's eyes as he tried to reach his hand over to the fuming man cursing him.

The man refused such genuine kindness from his son as he violently shook away from Lee's tentative touch. "I was NEVER your father you worthless piece of_ trash_! Do you have ANY IDEA! ANY! Of how much I _SUFFERED_ because of _YOU_!? Do you have any _IDEA_ of the pain I went through after losing my wife to you?! I was forced to trade the life of the woman I adored for one I did not even _WANT_!" he continued his spiteful tirade, not once stopping to acknowledge the dejected tugs forming on Lee's lips.

"I…I am…truly…sorry Father. I am. But it was…not my fault…not my fault…not…my…"

"I can't _STAND_ your lies! I can't stomach the sight of _YOU_!"

"I am sorry…that I was not enough. I was never enough." He whispered, getting up to grab something from Sai's backpack. "…I apologize that it was my mother who died and not I."

With those parting words, Lee pulled his father's head into his chest, despite the man's furious struggles to break free. He did not have to fight for long, however, as he injected the last of the sedatives into his neck, finally silencing the infuriated man.

He continued to hug the man even after his body had clung motionlessly into his, his own body violently quivering as though it were possessed by a fever. "I am sorry…"

I was left helpless over what to do as he gently set his father's body back on the ground. No comforting words could cross my mind. No kind gestures could possibly mitigate the anguish he was experiencing right now. No person could alleviate his mood unless that person was his father. He stormed out of the cave, leaving us dumbfounded over what had just occurred. Perhaps it was the newly acquired strength from the hearty meat, or perhaps it was just my sheer inanity, but something made me pursuit him out into the foul snowstorm raging war outside the comfort of our shelter.

My hindered vision could barely see him even as he stood a foot in front of me, his back erect and hands tightly fisted by his sides. Snow swirled all around me, numbing my ears and nose on contact. I reached out a hand to touch his shoulder, still clueless as to what to do.

"It-it's okay Lee." I comforted into his ear, not knowing much of what else was proper to say. "We'll leave tomorrow morning…and you'll never have to see him again."

There was no answer, merely a tightening around my stomach as Lee's arms encircled me with a suppliant force.

"He is…my father." He uttered between his heavy rattled breaths. "I have…tried to forgive him…I have tried to reason with him…and yet…I…HATE…him. Why can I not love him as you do yours?" he asked as though the response were simple.

"Lee…he wasn't your father. He never was." I mumbled.

"Why does he hate me so much? Why does he blame me for so many things? Why did _he_ have to be my father?"

"Well…we do not get to choose our fathers."

"Then why bother?"

"Because we can choose who we look up to."

Lee's body loosened once he heard this, his body melting into mine even with this numbing weather.

"Thank you." He sighed in relief.

In the midst of that skin freezing storm, snow wildly lashing out at any exposed part of my body, and wind wanting desperately to thrash both our bodies into oblivion, I knew one thing was certain.

I had never felt so warm in my life.


	29. Content Conclusion

HELLO! Before I begin with the last chapter of this story, which literally took me YEARS to finish, I would like to give my sincerest gratitude to all the people who took the time out of their days to message me and motivate me to finish the story. Honestly, without readers like you, I would not have finished this fanfiction. I thank you from the bottom of my heart. Also, my deepest apologies for taking so long to update. School and work are a lot harder now than it was when I first started working, but your guys' patience has known no bounds. Truly, I love you all. **ALSO** I could not find it within myself to finish this story without deepening the bond between Sakura and Lee. While there is no full blown smut on this chapter, the descriptive parts will be highlighted with a "_**UUUUUU**_" for those who wish to skip such parts. So without further hesitation…here it is..the final chapter…ENJOY!

**Content Conclusion**

He carried his corporal hindrance with an almost tangible shred of antipathy and pride for his accomplishment. His father's heavy body bestowed Lee with wide berth from the rest of us as we walked through the dense woods back home. Even Neji, with his exuding injuries and muffled grunts of pain, walked tacitly behind his teammate. It seemed forbidden to talk to Lee at the moment-he was poison, untouchable, _unreachable_ even. Any effort to communicate with the man would be disdained not only by him, but by the team as a whole. Mud clung to his knees and deterred the ninja as the rain continued to pour down his face. The water was lackadaisically welcomed, our bodies far too exhausted to care what landed on our bodies. It moistened my chapped lips, reminding me that I had not drank water for what seemed liked days. I slightly opened my mouth and let a few drops splash against my tongue as the rest washed my clothes of the bloody remnants of the fight.

None of us had talked save for the rare mumbled apology if one of our arms brushed against that of another's (specifically Sai or Tenten's).

I groaned wearily and wondered how much longer we would have to drag our feet before we even saw a glimpse of our beloved village. The behavior of our team's second female was beginning to be a cause for concern. Her skin was starting to feel as though it were attached to mine judging from the proximity we held. Her eyes averted Sai's despite his best efforts to visually communicate with her. It was inevitably vexing me to the point where it was becoming an ordeal having to be sandwiched between them. But I knew I would not move, I could not do that to Tenten. All I could do was continue to be this makeshift middlewoman implying to a clueless Sai to give us privacy.

My friend's hand clutched my arm like a lost sailor at sea clung on to a piece of floating flotsam jettison. She was quite persistent in her refusal to make any sort of contact with Sai. I did not even know why she had bothered to kiss him in the first place.

"Lee…why don't we rest?" The leader of Gai's team calmly spoke up. "It is near nightfall and we have been walking for-"

"No, I wish to rid myself of this as soon as possible." Lee snapped back, never looking behind him to face Neji.

"We will get lost in this darkness and this time my byakugan can't-"

"Then do not use it. The village is only about two or three more hours distance." He interrupted, keeping his pace.

His leader glared at him with his one useful eye, but concluded the fight was unnecessary. "You fool…" he muttered, yet continued to walk.

I frowned at both men, not because of their irrelevant disagreement, but because any form of sound was like getting a brick flung at my head. The unforgiving snow had disappeared from the ground as we continued to walk, fecund dirt had taken its place, and now we were at the mercy of the unrelenting rays of the sun and the scarce shade a few trees provided. We were near the village, that much was certain, but I could not bring myself to take more steps. The soles of my feet seemed to be under attack by the grinding pebbles, I could feel each blade of grass as if it were needles. My breaths turned to spurning releases of prickly air. Pink hair flooded my vision as it stuck to my eyelids and cheeks from perspiration. The jacket I had clung on to for my survival was now being dragged across the ground in a useless fashion as the temperature rose. My skin glowed pink from the sun's harsh treatment even as the rain lapped at our bodies, my lips seemed chapped in layers from the lack of hydration. No matter how much the sputters of rain dropped on my mouth, it still felt like an arid sponge soaking up drops of liquid.

We could not talk. We could not rest. We could only keep walking to put as much distance between us and what had happened in that tundra. My muscles screamed in agony while I focused on moving my feet, my vision becoming exceedingly blurred. It felt as though someone had suddenly placed a hot brick on my head and I was forced to balance my entire body without it falling to the ground. This, of course, proved to be an ordeal as I found myself swaying my entire weight as if I were drunk.

The whole earth seemed to rotate and mock my sense of balance.

The draining effects of the experience still plagued me it seemed.

"SAI!"

Neji had called out my teammate's name.

And yet I could not answer.

Something resembling moss and gritty mud had slammed across my face as someone shoved my weakened body into the ground.

My eyes hesitantly opened to what appeared to be a room. The traumatizing stench of iodine put my sense on edge and the coarse bleached bed sheets ruffled uncomfortably around my legs. Translucent light filtered into the room through curtains slowly wavering as wind blew into them. Sudden alarm from where I was made my body rise automatically from the bed. I cam crashing back down, however, as I winced in pain. An ugly IV needle stuck out from my arm, it's dripping bag mocking my health.

"How you feeling?"

My head shot towards the sound of the soothing voice.

Like a dog loyally waiting for the return of its master, Naruto stood next to room's door, back erect and arms crossed with an air of eerie serenity about him. His arms were crossed and he appeared to be smothered with silent fury.

"I-I'm fine." I tried vainly to wave off his concern as my voice came out raspy and unused. "H…how are you?" I asked back stupidly.

"You've been out a full day you know." He responded, taking confident and wide steps toward me.

"Have I? Where are the oth-"

Naruto's arms encircled my back as the words were embraced out of me. Lips roughly kissed my forehead as his hands rose to run through my hair.

"I was so worried Sakura." He muttered though clenched teeth. "So _damn_ worried."

"I-I'm okay now Naruto." I answered, surprised from this behavior.

I was expecting him to fall on his face as he walked towards me, I was expecting to punch him before he even had a chance to hug me, I was expecting someone as rude as Sasuke to save me from this intimate moment between his teammates, I was expecting something-_anything_, to interrupt this warm welcoming contact. What followed next, I would not be able to recall without feeling a sense of selfpity, emptiness, and shame.

His wavering lips trailed over my eyes, kissing my cheeks in what I thought was a desperate unanticipated way of greeting a beloved missed friend. Wanting somehow to return the caring soft action, I leaned against his shoulder, a sob escaping my lips. Tears stained his white hokage robe, stained the white fabric until there was nothing left but a damp spot where my cheeks had been. Where crying would be considered a sin in front of other men, it was somehow comforting in the face of Naruto. It was something I could not even bring myself to do with ease even with Lee.

So I cried.

I cried even as Naruto rubbed my back in hopes of providing comfort, I cried even as he wiped the copious amount of tears from my eyes with his hands, I cried even as he kissed my forehead again, and I cried even as he littered my face with his lips, kissing my mouth with as much carelessness as when he kissed my cheeks. I was too caught up in so many hindering emotions crashing into me without allowing me a chance to react properly.

I suppose that is why, without any reaction, without any consideration into future consequences…

I suppose that is why I allowed myself this moment of brief, insane, foolish, gullibility.

His lips tasted of desperation, of salted bitter tears as my eyes continued to weep, of comfort in the midst of confused, deprived, chaos.

"S-STOP!" I cried, my mind finally shocking me back into reality as I turned my head away from him.

Naruto did as he was demanded to do. He kept his distance and tore away from me in the process.

I had no way of knowing if those tears staining Naruto's face were his or my own. Tights fists shook frantically and humiliated blue eyes turned to the side.

"Sak…Sakura, I-I'm…sorry. I-I know that…I should've stopped! I should've known better! I know you're with Lee and I know what I did was wrong! I never meant to take it that far! I-I…I…DAMN IT!" he yelled in frustration. "DAMN IT! I….damn it…"

"Naruto…calm down…" I said, the effects of dehydration and all those superfluous macabre experiences disorienting me. His screaming was not alleviating my drug induced state.

"I-I'm sorry Sakura! Truly…I am…I-I've just…do you have ANY idea how much I've _missed_ you?" he blurted out.

His random question pulled me out of my piercing headache if only momentarily. "Wh…what?" I asked.

The new hokage sat himself next to me, back erect as if supported against a wall, wet eyes widening and closing to mentally prepare himself.

"I'm so sorry Sakura…I-I know…it's my fault. If I could've just restrained myself…especially when you're like this! It was…it was wrong of me to do this when you can barely think straight!"

"It…it was both our faults." I said. "Just…just don't talk about it. Forget it ever happened." I muttered.

"How can I _forget_?" He suddenly spat out angrily.

The edges of my lips pulled into what felt like a pain filled smile. Facial muscles were bruised and dry with the harsh treatment of the arctic sun and were not much use for smiling. Yet I grinned nonetheless for our silly behavior.

"We've been in the same room for less than a minute and we're already fighting, I never thought I'd see the day when I would be happy because of it." I admitted wearily.

Naruto opened his mouth as if to further hiss out vitriol, yet clamped it shut when he realized I trying to be humorous.

"Was the mission that bad?" he asked, his eyes dropping to my lap in worry.

I shrugged, wanting anything but to recall those morbid memories.

"It doesn't matter…we're here…we're safe and we're alive." I murmured.

"M-hm." Naurto for once opted for a taciturn answer and slouched his back, relieving it of its uncharacteristically former tense posture.

The pitiful amount of movement on my part had enervated my entire body, forcing it through what had felt like hiking a mountain after running a marathon. My own back collapsed back on the crisp sterile sheets of the hospital's bed. The air conditioner was on, its slow hums drowning out what dearth of words Naruto and I had left to say. His hand snaked its way to the covers, raising them to my neck for warmth. I smiled in return, but said nothing, afraid I would obliviously welcome some awkward moment upon us if I did. My teammate's immense hat lay on a nearby chair, leaving him to ruffle up his once captured blonde locks.

"You look…really handsome with that Hokage get up you have on." I complimented without a care in the world as to how Naruto would perceive it.

He smiled back and continued to run both his hands through his messy hair.

"…So you won't tell Lee? Simple as that?" he scoffed, all but throwing my honest compliment to the ground and spitting on it.

"How can I? It was a stupid thing…just…just forget it." I literally waved it off with my hand. "I'm drugged with enough stuff to take out a horse and you're famous for doing stupid things and-"

"It wasn't stupid for me Sakura." He said through gritted teeth. "I take it back…I don't regret doing it to you, in fact I'm glad..since I finally got it off my chest."

I blinked in blatant confusion. "So it was just an itch you were dying to scratch?"

"I _never_ do things because of a whim, Sakura. In fact I would still kiss you if you'd let me." He answered crisply.

"Then you'll have to forgive me if I don't allow you." I snapped back with unnecessary and icy prudency. "Naruto…I'm in love with Lee…"

"No man who truly loves you would put you through that…that _hell_." He retorted through lividly pursed lips.

"I went through that on my own accord. Don't blame Lee." I assured, "and I would do it again for him."

Naruto was anything but pleased with my haughty answer and apparently decided to further discomfit the situation.

"Sakura…I still love you."

"Naruto, I'm just a woman you have seen since you were a child. We are close, we are like a family, no matter what I might have said in the past, no matter how immature I was with Sasuke and you, no matter what stupidities I may have done…"

"I don't care. Sakura, if anything happens…I will be there for you." My comrade interrupted sternly.

I gave him a blank stare that said nothing.

"Thank you…although I pray that that day never comes." I said, trying not to make it sound like a left-handed remark, but failing horribly in the process.

"Your wounds must not be that serious if you have enough energy to be so mean to me." Naruto said, albeit not in his usually mirthful manner I was so used to hearing from him.

"Speaking of wounds, how's the rest of my team?" I asked, my mind barely grasping the fact that others had been affected.

"Tenten's fine. Neji's complaining about not being allowed to train until his eye heals and Sai…he's holding up."

"And Lee?" I uttered nervously.

"I've put him off duty for the time being. After personally delivering the prisoner to us, which I took great pleasure in taking away, he…" Naruto fidgeted with his hokage hat, "he passed out. I think he's a floor above you, actually."

"Is he all right?" I asked in sudden panic.

Naruto held up his hands in mock defense, "He's an excellent shinobi, it would take more than a second rate scientist to keep him down for long Sakura."

His assurance allayed my worries as I rested back down on my pillows. "When will I be able to get out of here? I hate the smell of everything…it's no wonder patients hate being here."

He chuckled and put his hat in place once more. "Lee said the same thing. I can…I can kind of see why the two of you fit together."

I smiled and pressed my head further into my hard pillows for comfort. "I can't wait to see him…"

Naruto gave me a weak smile and nodded as he walked towards the door. "Yeah…I bet you can't. But first you have to rest okay? Then you can go see him."

If I had not been so drugged I would have stopped him to chat with him longer.

He left immediately anyway, his face admitting no defeat yet momentarily realizing there was no possible room left for him. There was nothing I could do to console him even though I wished there could have been. I could offer no words of encouragement with this adversity he faced; there was none I could give.

The following week produced no signs of Lee, albeit copious visits from Naruto, Sasuke, and the rest of my friends were enough to keep me occupied. It was only when I was bereft of any company that Lee's absence had a significant toll on me. What kind of man did not visit his moribund girlfriend in the hospital? I bit my lip and tried to think of other things that did not prick at my eyes. He was probably in a worse condition than I was and here I was, bickering over visits. The room smelled faintly of the flowers that Naruto had made a habit to send. A myriad of sunflowers, lilacs, and tulips filled my sinuses and threatened to use up every box of tissues in the hospital.

"Such beauty need not be grieving." The somewhat poetic verse stirred me from my melancholic state.

It was as if a divine deity had read my mind and decided to grace me with a favor.

Lee's exhausted and hunched over form could be seen through the darkness in my room. I heard him close the door behind him quietly.

"Lee? You're supposed to be in your _bed_!" I hissed, although my excitement at seeing him easily pushed away any feelings of resentment toward him.

He balanced himself with a crutch as he limped his way to me, that smirk of his impossible to not be contagious.

"I missed you. Is that not reason enough to get up from bed?" he asked innocently, hiding his pained grunts with each step he took.

"Not when you're supposed to be recuperating!"

"It does not matter to me..I needed to see you.." he replied as he shakily put his crutches to the side of my bed and slowly sat next to me.

"You're going to open up your wounds, you know." I berated, scooting over to make more room for him to rest.

"For you it is worth it." He said while he propped both legs on top of my bed with great and painful sounding effort.

"Idiot." I grumbled, before wrapping my arms around him as tightly as I could without causing any more bodily damage. "I'm glad I finally got to see you though…you have no idea how much I've _missed_ you."

"The feeling is mutual…" he responded, returning the embrace. "I wanted to see you sooner, but I am afraid our dear hokage kept a close watch on me."

I let out a laugh that only seemed to exacerbate the pain on my bruised stomach.

"That sounds like him."

"How are you feeling?" he asked worriedly, noticing my sudden cringing.

"Better now that you're here."

I kissed his forehead before plopping back down on my pillows. It took far too much strength to support my upper body. My hands pulled at him until I felt his body rest next to mine.

"And how are _you_ feeling? Anything broken?" I asked.

Lee's hand wrapped itself around mine. "No, just a sprained ankle that I got from when I passed out."

"And…" I contemplated my next question, but curiosity won me over, "and what happened to…him?" I asked, hoping the mention of his father had not stunted any healing Lee was trying to cultivate about the experience.

The smooth current of conversation froze. I felt Lee move a bit before his hand rested on my stomach.

"My father..." he worded the title with reluctance, "I now realize that I am a much better man than he could ever hope to be. Let us leave it at that."

"Well, I'm glad you finally figured _that_ part out." I said with a smile as I squeezed his hand. "And I'm glad that we all made it out okay…"

"Yes…although I think Neji was too risky for my taste. The fool could have rendered his eye useless."

"I can't judge him. We all did stupid things for our survival." I pointed out softly.

I felt Lee stir next to me again as he sighed. "Yeah…we did. But I suppose Neji did it to save us…and _Tenten_ of course." He said the woman's name as if he was aware of a secret that I was not.

"Why do you say that?" I asked, curiosity egging me on to reveal the secret.

"Neji really does…care for Tenten. I do not know why I have not noticed it before…perhaps because he rarely makes his feelings apparent."

"No, _really_? I thought he blushed and started stammering like a love struck schoolboy whenever he saw Tenten." I said dryly. "Faints just like Hinata does too whenever she sees Naruto."

My blonde teammate's name escaped my lips rather guiltily.

Lee let out a roar of laughter that left him cringing in pain and clutching his stomach. He stopped laughing instantly.

"Well, I do not recall him doing such a thing, but if it was not obvious before, then I am sure Tenten has noticed by now."

"You think she's really interested in him, don't you?" I asked, wondering what could make Lee assume this much.

"Why would she not be? He is a highly successful man and she is the only female he can stand for an extended amount of time."

"That's real love right there." I joked, trying to hide my amusement from his assumptions. "Tolerance equals love."

"You sound rather pessimistic about this new relationship."

"Maybe because it's _not_ a romantic relationship, not if Sai has anything to say about it."

"Sai?..._Sai_?" he blurted out incredulously as if he was making sure we were speaking about the same ROOTS member. "What would _he_ have to say about it?"

I played with my blankets nervously. "I think Tenten likes him."

"It does not mean the feeling is mutual." Lee said, albeit with a humorous amount of defense for Neji.

"Maybe not, but I think it is."

"What makes you so sure?"

"I don't know." I blurted out, careful not to turn into the nosy old next door neighbor. "I'll be sure to ask both of them when I see them."

"You will not dare! If they are going out they will tell us themselves!" he said with a warning tone.

"Pipe down. I know, I know." I assured, half joking.

"Plus, I hardly think it would be a smart match."

"Um, who are we to judge? If they're happy then-"

"Neji plans to propose." He divulged me with the gossip like the women who sat in beauty salons all day talking about who was cheating on their spouse or getting fat.

I completely stopped fooling around with my blankets. "He _WHAT_? When did you hear this!" I exclaimed, taking the juicy verbal bait.

"Today, but do not _dare_ tell Tenten this!-"

"I won't! I won't!-"

"-Neji came to my room earlier today and-"

"What did he look like?"

"Like he had seen better days." He replied fatly, as if that were obvious. "He told me that this past mission had made him realize how short the lives are for people in our profession, so he plans to ask Tenten as soon as they are out of the hospital."

"But her and Sai-"

"Neji noticed it too, but he says he will ask her anyway."

"Is he _trying_ to steal her from Sai?"

"They are not _going out_ Sakura! Get that thought out of your head!" he berated desperately.

"And how do _you_ know? What makes you so sure they are not doing the exact same thing we are?"

"Slipping into each other's rooms?"

"_Dating_!"

"They're _not_!"

I groaned in exasperation as I released his hand. "Lee…they're dating…well as far as I can tell."

Lee didn't…or couldn't say anything in return. I thought I had heard him release what had seemed like a surprised gasp, but he kept his reactions at bay.

"How do you know?" he asked stoically.

"They kissed…OH-but don't tell him I said that!" I exclaimed as if Lee would be imprudent enough to expose me.

"They…what? When? I saw no such thing! They do not appear as if they are going out! How can a man like Sai-"

"-What _about_ Sai? Tenten's the one who is choosing, not _you_ Lee." I tried not to use my scolding voice.

"I am fully aware of that, but to a degree this is also Neji's choice. If he chooses to pursue her, I am confident that he can win her over." He responded as if that were possible.

"…That just sounds like a bad idea." I muttered, "I don't think Neji is even her type. He's always so grouchy and serious."

"He is my best friend, I do not expect you know him as I do, but he is a kind man who would treat Tenten as she deserves to be treated."

"With cold shoulders and two word sentences?" I joked.

Lee stiffened, although if it was because of his wounds or my awful crack, I did not know.

"He is not Sasuke. Anyway, he is a good man. I do not think he has anything to worry about."

"What is _that_ supposed to mean?"

"I do not mean to sound rude, but he and Sai are no competition."

"That's what I first thought about you and Sasuke, but you beat his ass the first time you met him." I quipped, swiftly reminding him that geniuses did not always win simply because they were bred for success.

I could have sworn I felt the lightest flinch from Lee, but he gave no inclination to agreeing with my statement. He cleared his throat to change the subject, almost as if the memory itself was nothing more than an embarrassing relic left over from his childhood.

"That was long ago, and you are clearly mistaken if you think I mean they are no competition simply because Neji is stronger in a fight, which I _know_ he is." He corrected rather smugly. "I mean in other terms."

"Such as?"

"Sakura…Sai is…Sai is a complicated comrade. That is all I am going to say about the matter." He said tersely.

I felt my face flare up in indignation at the mere nuance of a negative opinion of my fourth team member.

"I hardly think you're in any place to talk down on people who are 'complicated'! Sai is a good guy and he could make Tenten happy in ways Neji lacks, so _there_!" I exclaimed defensively like a mother shielding her young from maltreatment.

Lee chuckled dryly and laid a light kiss on my head.

"Well, we'll let Tenten figure that out for herself. I meant no disrespect, I know you and Sai are good friends." He stated.

There seemed to be room for an apology, but sadly I never received it even though my volatile state needed it at the moment.

Lee had other things on his mind for me instead of apologizing.

"Let us go to sleep." A yawn accompanied his demand.

"What? With _you_? Here? _Now_?" I asked incredulously. "Won't the nurse come in the morning and-"

"Yes, with me. Who else is here? Naruto?" He chuckled at his own joke, blissfully unaware at how nerve-racking that joke was for me. He kissed my head once more before turning on his stomach and burying his face in the pillow.

I laughed rather loudly and robotically before pulling the blanket over us.

"Why did you laugh like that?" He managed to ask, his voice disturbed and muffled a bit by the pillow.

Sometimes I wished Lee was too exhausted to ask questions this late at night.

I played with the ends of the blanket, suddenly fascinated by the fabric and texture. My eyes darted across the darkness to where Lee rested not two inches away from me in the narrow hospital bed. I could barely make out his figure, but I could feel his eyes meeting my own as his head turned away from the pillow and slowly focused on me. In my perturbed state I could even make out the slightest of eye blinks…or perhaps that was just my conscience slowly batting away at my sanity. Lee drew a long, tired sigh and seemed to wait for something.

"Lee…I…"

"He spoke to me about it." he stated calmly.

My mind refused to linger on any one thought for long as my heart beat itself out of my ribcage.

I felt my eye widen in panic.

My tongue turned to sand.

And my throat…

My throat was the desert.

"A-a-about….a-about w-what?"

Lee took another long breath and I heard his hand rub the back of his head in contemplation for his next choice of words.

"Sakura…I _know_ that Naruto proposed to you."

While his breathing was lax and enervated, mine was rapid and ragged. I kept blinking, hoping that by doing so, I would be able to make out his facial expressions and see how he took the news. His voice had no meaning, no emotion attached to it. There was nothing to tell me he was angry or offended from this news. I had no way of knowing how he felt and that seemed to exacerbate my panicked state even more.

"A-and?...Do you-…do you know w-what…what my answer was?" I asked, hoping to come across as mature and self-assured, but failing miserably with my broken voice.

My anxiety screeched to a halt as I felt a gentle hand reaching out for mine in the lightless room. Confusion and hurt took the place of dread and alarm.

"He is…he is a good man Sakura, he will not make you miserable and he will take care of you." He said calmly as if he was a tired traveler parting with his favorite belonging.

My teeth clenched.

"But _you're_ going to take care of-"

"-You know…if something should happen to me…"

I shut my eyes at the mere possibility he was implicating. I began to resent his words.

"_Nothing_ is going to happen to you!" I assured, confused at his choice of grim topic.

"I only wish for you to be happy should something-"

"Shut up, SHUT UP! NOTHING WILL HAPPEN TO YOU!" I raised my voice as I gathered all my patience to keep from lashing out.

"But if it DOES!" he demanded as he gently took both my shoulders. My eyes had quickly adapted to the night, and his own held no empathy for me, no warmth that welcomed a positive attitude or an optimistic future. "Sakura…_promise_ me you will marry Naruto if something _does_ happen to-"

"_NO_!" I yelled, pushing his arms away from me.

"PROMISE ME!" he supplicated again.

"I'm going to marry who I want and that person will be _you_! Now _SHUT UP_!" I ended the conversation as I threw my blankets over me. "If I would have known you would come here just for this, I would have locked my door."

"Sakura…if I am no longer here.." he started the grim subject again no matter how much he knew it was angering me, "…I only want you to-"

"-you make it sound as if you're _dying_!" I cried, realizing I was holding back a sob. "You're a terrible person for even bringing up the subject!"

I felt warm hands make a grab for my shoulders again.

"Death is never a welcomed subject, but one that I must cover nonetheless." He said as he pulled the covers away from me and rested his head against my own. "Sakura, I will not die. The only way that would even be possible if it meant saving your life in return for my own. But…I want you to have someone who will care for you and love you as I do now. Please understand that."

"How'd you find out Naruto proposed to me?" I almost whimpered.

"He asked me if he could before I left for my mission, of course." Lee responded as though it were obvious.

"And you said '_yes'_?" I asked, insulted from his attitude.

"I wanted both of you to not have any doubts…that is the worst thing one can have when you love someone. I should know." He said.

"That still doesn't mean I'm not angry at you." I retorted and pulled my covers back over my head in an attempt to ignore him.

Lee sighed and kissed the blanket covering my face. "Please do not be upset."

"How can I NOT be upset!" I hissed as I momentarily shot my head out from underneath the covers. "You just agreed to SHARE me with Naruto, you _sick_ minded-!"

"Whoever said a thing about _sharing_ you? It is a backup plan, not polygamy!" he said in a somewhat amused voice. "I would never dream of sharing you with anyone. You are mine as much as I am yours." He assured.

"You _still_ made it sound like you were giving me to Naruto." I grumbled.

"I would beat any man who had that intention, I do not care if it was our Hokage!"

I was still not convinced as I showed him my back and burrowed into the uncomfortable sterile bed for warmth. "I still hate you for even mentioning it."

"Would you still hate me once I made mind-blowing love to you for forgiveness?" he whispered into my now burning ear.

"You mean before or _after_ Naruto made mind-blowing love to me as well?" I scoffed back.

"Sakura, you know I did not mean it like that…" I could _sense_ him pouting in the darkness.

"Well, you sure _sounded_ like you did."

Lee sighed and wrapped one arm around my rigid and livid body.

"Sakura, okay fine. It was foolish of me to choose for you. I just wanted you to know that if for any reason, something happens to me…"

"Lee, we're going to die when we're old and withered and have lived full lives filled with smiles, fattening food, and sex. So shut it." I finished for him.

He laughed and turned me over to face him. "All right…you win. I will die with you once we are old and tired of sex." He said as he chuckled at the last part.

"Damn straight." I muttered. "And trust me, I'll _never_ get tired of that, so you'd better _pray_ I die before you do!"

The following days produced sporadic visits from Lee and my friends and medical checkups from nurses that seemed almost superfluous considering I was healing any small wounds I had with the abundance chakra my body had to offer to me from the hours of rest and food the hospital had provided me. The only positive thing that came of my bedridden state was the lack of paperwork I had to help Lady Tsunade in, which I was sure Shizune was having a field day with me missing in action from the office. The weeks seemed to merge into one long day that only took a break when my eyes close to sleep. This form of existence was taxing on my mind.

"Have you seen Tenten?"

Sai's voice ripped me from my idle thoughts as I saw his head peer into my room.

I stopped in the midst of my ruminations long enough to stare at Sai from his odd question.

"Y-yeah. All the time…she comes by to check on Lee. Why?"

"She has stopped sending me books."

"That's not my problem." I teased. "Why don't you go talk to her?"

"Because I do not want to get yelled at by her." He said somberly.

I cocked an eyebrow at him and motioned for my teammate to enter my room.

"Well…why would she yell at you?"

Sai held a slight limp as he walked into the room and saw down in one of the uncomfortable chairs close to my bed."…With you it's almost expected, but with her…it feels just like the first time Homo looked at me when I met him." He said, alluding to the jerk's terrifying sharingan ability no doubt.

"Am I to assume that you want me to be the middle woman and talk to her?" I asked with a sigh as I finished with the bandages.

"No…I am simply asking about her disappearance."

"She didn't disappear Sai, she probably just got sick and tired of you." I joked heartlessly with a cackle.

My friend failed to see the sarcasm in my words and furrowed his eyebrows at me in worry.

"Did I anger her?"

"No you idiot. Listen, do you want to talk to her or not?"

"Of course."

"Ask her out on a date then."

"A…what?"

"A…you know…DATE. A _date_. The kind of meeting where you talk to the person, probably eat with them, and find out more about them."

I now knew how bored housewives felt when there was no amusement around for miles. Idle hands made for a bolder tongue and mind and a lack of proper communication between the two of them.

Sai's face relaxed to that of one who finally understood.

"Oh! Is that what it is? We have been on _plenty_ of those then!"

"What?" I asked. Now _I_ was the one who was confused.

"I have asked Naruto something similar since I wanted to learn more about Tenten's knowledge on how to make friends. He would say to take her out to Ichiraku ramen every time, so I did for several months."

"…Oh…" I said, puzzled.

It would be a glorious day when Sai finally realized what an idiot he was.

"I learned plenty about her even after she had nothing else to teach me about making friends. I suppose I kept on asking her out of habit since it became pleasant to have her around me."

"So you like her?"

"I've told you I don't even know what that is. All I know is that it was pleasant to talk to her any chance I could get."

"So…you…_like_ her?" I asked again, Sai's stupid answers were only further confirming his feelings toward her. "Well, look at it this way, do you ask _other_ girls out?"

"What?" He asked as his eyebrows burrowed in worry. "No. I enjoy _her_ company the most and find it bothersome when other girls interrupt our talk because they confuse me with Homo."

"So you LIKE HER!" I practically screamed in delight.

"No. I simply-"

"Shut up Sai." I ordered. The man was forced to obey as he closed his mouth. "_That_, Sai,…is when you like someone."

"What is?"

"THAT! Th-the whole 'I like being with her, I like learning things about her, I like HER!' kind of thing! You, Sai, _like_ someone."

"Is…is that all right?"

His question was enough to throw me off guard.

"Wait…what? What do you _mean_ '_Is that all right_'? What kind of question is that?" I asked as if the mere question was stupid of him to voice.

"I was taught to have no name, to have no emotions, to have no past…to have no future, to only focus entirely on the mission." He said succinctly, his eyebrows furrowing in slight worry.

"Well…you _have_ a name, and whether or not you'd like to admit it to yourself, you DO have emotions. You may not remember much about your past, but you _do_ have a future and a say on what you want to do with your life."

"But…my past…how can I just leave that and expect her to accept it? How can she accept _me_?" he asked as if I had the answer to such a question.

I sighed and took a seat closer to his bed.

"Listen…Sai, you have to look at where you are now, and forward. If you keep looking back on the past, you can't move forward. You taught me that."

"I did?"

I shrugged as I gave him an earnest look. "I wouldn't lie to you. Now stop being emotional and talk to Tenten the next time you see her to fix that problem up."

__

She apologized profusely to the boy as he stared stoically above her. Her arms encircled his bare waist adamantly, her face buried in his sluggishly breathing chest. Sai was at a loss, his arms were stiff with discomfiture, his hands confused as to how to react. He struggled to concoct some form of logic from her actions, yet none would come.

"Tenten, I cannot be angry at you even if I wished for such an emotion. I would just like to know why your visits have dwindled in recent days." He said flatly.

"I was embarrassed." She admitted, her cheeks a bloodied flush while Sai held her at arm's length.

"Of what?" he asked, his oblivious expression suddenly rising some lividness out of Tenten.

" '_Of what_'? You seriously can't be this clueless!" she exclaimed, her lips stern and unforgiving.

"I _am_ clueless. Is there something wrong I did that made you angry?" he inquired. "Usually when a woman is angry at a man, he unknowingly does something that displeases her."

"It's more like what you _didn't_ do." She muttered under her breath as she sighed in defeat and got off the bed.

"What _didn't_ I do?" Sai pleaded to know with a vexed look. Apparently his keen sense of hearing from countless spying missions left Tenten flustered.

Her feet shifted uncomfortably on the floor, her hands tucked behind her back as if it would help her situation. "Back at the cave…" she grumbled, "you know what happened…why do I need to remind you?"

Sai's eyes widened just a bit in remembrance, easily reverting to their calm almond shape as he patted the spot next to him on the bed with his IV injected arm. Taking it as a sign to sit back down, Tenten sighed again and took her place, albeit a prudent two feet away from the alabaster skinned man. Both lied in silence, their backs erect as Sai thought of his words.

"Are you angered because you were expecting a different result when it happened?" he finally asked.

"…Y-I mean m-maybe, I don't know." She stumbled ungracefully on her reply.

Again, silence penetrated their conversation.

"I'm sorry." He uttered.

"Ah, don't be. I'm the one who kissed you." Tenten responded. "Maybe I'm the one who should be sorry."

"That is not necessarily true."

"What do you mean?"

"When..when you did that…that thing, I could have easily pushed you back in response…I could have easily told you to stop…and I could have easily avoided your contact altogether." He rummaged through his reasoning. "But for one reason or another…I wasn't disgusted or disturbed by it."

"So…what does _that_ mean?" Tenten asked with mild interest.

"Since my initial reaction was not one of rejection, I am led to assume that _logically_ my body was somewhat attracted to the stimuli."

The brown haired woman simply blinked in return, not quite understanding the man in front of her.

"Can you say that in a way that doesn't make you sound like a machine?" she joked with a slanted smirk.

"It means I probably liked it."

"_Probably_?" she asked in a mock insulted manner.

"More than likely, then." He corrected, unaware of the ever closing distance between them.

"I see."

"What do you want of me? I can't guarantee that I will be as good to you as Lee is to Sakura. I am oblivious to most of your implications, physical affection is hard to reciprocate for me, I wouldn't know what to do in a 'relationship', and I can't even begin to understand why you would-"

His body was mauled back into the bed as Tenten pinned him down with the weight of her body and her lips once again crashing down on his.

"Well, for starters, you can begin by kissing me back." She said with a smile, her mouth leaving his for a moment so as to tantalize him.

"Kiss you back?" he asked, the slightest hues of red staining his skin.

"Or not. It all depends on whether or not your 'attraction theory' holds out." She replied, her voice a mixture of hope and fear of facing rejection.

That fear was thankfully averted as Sai automatically tilted his head upwards to meet her lips again.

"Just do what I do." She consoled, caressing his cheek with her fingertips as her other hand ran through his hair.

_****_

Healthier days followed as we were released from the hospital one by one. Those days, Lee was adamant about spending time with my family and his friends. It seemed my parents enjoyed his presence and seemed to enjoy embarrassing me in front of him even more. There were nights when we went out to dinner together, just the four of us. There were days when we went out as a group, much to Naruto's chagrin and Sasuke's initial reluctance. There were even times when we could be found training or relaxing with Tenten and Sai and of course, there were times when Lee would set aside time to spend time with his mentor and best friend. Those days, I would spend my time with Tenten.

Today was not one of those days.

Today would consist of cooking with my mother.

"How is Lee's therapy going, Sakura?" she asked as she nibbled on a rice cracker while I made quick work of some fruit.

"It's better. The psychologist says his mood changes are not as unstable as they once were."

"Is he still taking medication?"

"…Yes mom…"

"How is that working for him?"

"Well…his moods are better…" I said uncomfortably.

"That's good to hear. I am so proud of that boy and all he has done. His resilience is really remarkable."

I did not know what it was about a mother's compliments that made me feel flattered for picking Lee as a boyfriend.

"Thanks…I'm sure he's very happy too."

"Well, how can he _not_ be? He has a very wonderful girlfriend who supports him, right?"

"I guess."

"And I'm sure you two have been getting along well?"

"Yeah…I really like living with him." I confessed with an honest smile.

My mother smiled back and handed me a warm cup of tea as I took a seat next to her on the table. Her eyes quickly darted to meet my own while I drank my tea. A smile played on her lips. A knowing look that implied omnipotence glazed her eyes. She stood up from her seat and promptly turned on the faucet to wash dishes. I smiled nervously at her and stuffed a cracker in my mouth to break our sudden silence.

It was far too quiet for my mom to be in the same room and I began to worry.

"So…how's the sex?"

I nearly spat out my tea. "Erm…what?"

"The sex…you've _had _sex with Lee right?" she asked as she stopped washing the dishes and turned her head to look at me with a look upon her face that was laced with shock, wonderment and…was that…_pity_?

"What? _NO_!"

"You know Sakura, there is _nothing_ wrong with having sex before marriage if you love and respect one another and use protection."

"Mom…get off that topic please."

"I'm serious! You think _any_ of your friends' parents were virgins when _they_ got married? I tell you that Ino's mother was the FIRST one to-"

"OH DEAR GOD, MOM SHUT UP!" I begged as I began to be mentally scarred for the remainder of my life.

"And it's _healthy_ for you Sakura! It lowers bad cholesterol, boosts your immune system, and _how _does it get you up and running in the mornings!"

At this point I had decided to simply drown my mother's words out as I sipped at my tea.

"Sakura, you are so immature about it! I am sure Lee would be happy to take that next step with you!"

"What step?" asked an innocent voice as the door opened.

Lee had come in through the most opportune time as my life would have it.

"_Lee_!" my mom's voice suddenly changed to saccharine as she smiled at her favorite person in the room. "How are you? How did your mission go? Are you hungry? Tired?"

He chuckled and hugged the infernal woman tightly. "I am fine, thank you Mother." He responded like a well behaved son. "The mission was finished early and no, I am not hungry or tired, but thank you."

"That's a relief." My mom continued to grin.

"What step were you talking about with Sakura?" he asked as he walked over to me and kissed my forehead. "I have missed you." He whispered in my ear.

"Oh, we were talking about having se-!"

"S-second opinions!"

"On what?"

"On the…" my mind could provide no suitable or believable lie. "About the way you um…train!"

"The way I train?"

"No, we were talking about s-"

"SIT UPS! You know you hardly ever do any of those Lee! You really need to start taking better care of your body! It can't _always_ be weight lifting and cardio!" I chided nervously.

Lee seemed to wonder for a moment before agreeing. "Yes, I suppose I need to build up on the abdominal muscles. I have had so much of your father's delicious cooking that I never stopped to think what it would do to me!" he confessed.

'_Only in this family…the men in the house cook and complain about their weight and the women eat and don't give a second thought to packing on the pounds_.' I brushed the bizarre thought away and nodded.

"NO! Lee, what I was-!" Lee respectfully turned his head to face my mother as she was ready to protest before I silently cut her off by waving my horizontal hand across my neck.

'SHUT. UP.' I seemed to mouth to her.

She looked dismally at the floor before continuing to wash the dishes (like takeout required any plates).

"I was about to say that even _Sakura_ could use the exercise. She should join you." Her mordant remark nearly made me want to throw a chair at her.

"Good idea. Let's go and do them Lee." I snapped back as I screeched my chair back.

"But I was hoping we could-"

"Let's go." I cut him off as I pulled him by the hand. "BYE MOM." I seethed, hoping to send her on a guilt trip for my sudden departure.

"Bye Sakura! Love you!" she called back sweetly.

I could have sworn I heard Lee whimper as I dragged him outside.

"I feel as though I am neglecting something…" he said carefully, yet followed me nonetheless.

Lee sat uncomfortably in his seat and fumbled with a towel he had used to dry himself after taking a shower. He appeared enervated, but still alert to any words I could give him. He looked as if I was about to scold him.

"Is it safe to assume that your mother was not talking about my recreational eating?" he asked.

I sliced a carrot with all the dexterity of someone who had spent years in precision cutting. Tomatoes, or at least what looked like them, lay in a bundle of mush from so much slicing. Even the peas were not spared from my disturbed state as they lay in pieces next to the plate of tomatoes. It seemed I was doing all I could to keep my mind from wandering to my mother's perturbing words. She was not exactly the sanest woman I had ever met, but her lack of prudency was alarming. My finger narrowly missed getting chopped off as I hacked into a pumpkin I had bought earlier this morning.

"We were talking about sex." I groaned, staring at the vegetables as if they were the source of my problems.

"Oh?" his voice piqued in interest. "And what about it?"

"She blatantly stated her beliefs in there being nothing wrong in sex before marriage."

"But there _is_ nothing wrong with that. Just as there is nothing wrong with waiting until _after_ marriage." He whispered as he wrapped his damp towel around me. "You worry far too much."

He was a rather malleable man, one who would comply to anything I wanted. I laughed as his lips kissed a sensitive area around my neck. His warm chuckles reached my ears as he asked me what the matter was. This man was truly the ideal man I had yearned for, of this I had no doubt as I brought my arms behind him and pressed them against his back.

"Lee…you are bit more affectionate today than usual."

"What do you mean? I can't be intimate with the woman I adore?" he whispered into my ear.

"Yes, but only when you're not acting suspicious." I corrected, trying to keep my focus on chopping the carrots in front of me.

"Women are so complicated." He mumbled before bringing my lips with his fingers towards his.

"And men are so headstrong." I responded as I pulled back.

Something definitely was amiss.

His hands that were once on my face and neck soon began to caress my legs, bringing his fingers across every inch of my skin. He smiled as he began to play with the rim of my shorts.

"Sakura…speaking of your mother's choice of conversation…"

"Yeah?"

"Do you remember my promise before I left?"

I gulped, wishing for a moment we had forgotten all about it.

"Wh-what about it?" I asked, trying with all my might to remain casual about such a life altering topic.

"Would you like to make love?" he asked as simply as he had asked what I was making for dinner.

"What? Right _now_?" I almost whined.

His laughter nearly broke my anxiety.

"Of course! You ask that as if you dread the idea Sakura. Are you _that_ nervous or hesitant?" he asked in between his chuckles.

"N-no…I'm actually looking forward to it…it's just…"

"Just what?" he encouraged with a kiss on my nose.

"It…won't _change_ anything…will it?"

"I do not see why it should." He said with a chuckle. "Unless you believe that having sex before marriage will make you uncomfortable….then I am more than willing to wait."

"S-seriously?"

He assured me with a nod as his hand rubbed against my neck and cheek.

"I will do anything you ask of me Sakura. Anything."

"So if I asked for sex…you'd comply?"

"Even if it was four in the morning and I had an ANBU meeting in five minutes."

"…Wow…thanks." I blurted out, apparently flattered from his devotion.

"It just feels very…correct for me to say that I love you."

"Seriously? At FOUR in the A.M.? Even if you were dead tired and sleepy?"

"_Especially_ if I was dead tired and sleepy." He whispered against my ear, "_You_ would give more than enough energy." his implications were not going to waste in my gutter of a mind.

"_Tell_ me what you would do."

"I would begin to kiss you any way you wished…I would allow you take off my clothes in any manner you wished…I would take off your clothes in return and kiss your cheeks, your neck, your collarbone, your shoulders, every inch of your body. Sakura…in essence…I would do everything and anything that you wanted. I adore you that much."

"So…if I told you to make love to me…you'd do that _right_ now?" I asked, baffled over how he could say such a thing without ruining that serious expression of his.

"If you wished." He stated as he began to laugh. "What is it with the precise questions? Are you _that_ frightened?"

"Well, excuse me for being a virgin!" I said in indignation.

"I am not saying I am not new to this. I just find it adorable how you keep interrogating and making it into a science." He teased.

"I just find it priceless how you're not even _curious_!" I exclaimed, taking a few potatoes and making short work of them.

"Curious?" he repeated, blindly handing me a lettuce for whatever vegetables we were now obliviously cutting.

"You're willing to _WAIT_ for _sex_? And you're a _guy_? Somehow those three words don't belong together."

"What do you mean?" he asked, smiling as he leaned in closer to me.

"Lee…even I..even _I_ have.." I gulped like a parent explaining sex for the first time to a child. ".._urges_…a-and I just find it weird that you look like you've never had them!"

"Who is to say that I have never experienced them? You have simply never bothered to ask!" he corrected as he continued to chuckle.

"_Well_?"

"Well, what?"

"_Have_ you! Have you ever had…urges?"

"None that I can recall. I am a rarity among men I think." He stated, albeit tonelessly.

"How about dreams?"

"_About_ you or _with_ you?"

"BOTH!" I exclaimed, thinking I had hit the jackpot.

"I cannot recall either. I usually do not dream unless it is a nightmare."

Disappointment.

Utter….disappointment.

"So I guess that makes me the only pervert in this relationship?" I asked flatly, taking a few steps away from Lee as I continued cutting the carrots for dinner.

It was like making an energetic dog get off your lap.

Lee once again wrapped his arms around my stomach and kissed my jaw line, my fingers slightly shaking from the somewhat rough stimuli.

"And who is to say that you are?" he whispered.

"You just said you've never had-"

"Urges? No. _Needs_? Yes. I have always had needs, just like any other man Sakura. A need to be wanted, a need to be needed in return, a need to be with the one I love…," He answered softly, his hand resting on my navel, "…both emotionally and sexually."

"But you just-!" the knife lay abandoned by the cutting board, my mind was now more in tune to his hands wandering dangerously close to my lower abdomen.

"Ah, _but_, it all depends on asking the right questions Sakura." He whispered, his hands suddenly stopping.

"Right questions?" I mumbled, my head disoriented from the unexpected contact from Lee. "Like what?"

"Like straightforward questions instead of using pseudonyms or implications." He responded with a smirk as his lips playfully nipped at my neck.

"Fine." I snapped back, turning around and shoving his body against the kitchen table before he had a chance to react. "Have you ever been turned on before?"

"Of course."

"Have you been thinking about making love in the past twenty-four hours?"

"Past three weeks and a half, actually."

"So why the sudden change from a chaste saint to an opened minded man with normal desires?" I asked, almost insulted from being neglected from this information.

"I do not know…it is not as if I have not tried to control it!" he pointed out as he grabbed a cutting board I had been using and placed it between us in mock defense. "You are so confusing at times that I do not know if you wish to wait, or kill me, or make love!"

"_You're_ one to talk! Here you are, practically _shoving_ your hand down my shorts but when I react you hide behind a cutting board!" I exclaimed as I tried to pull said cutting board away from the petrified man.

"See? This is what I mean! I am afraid of being castrated now when just a moment ago you were so kind to me!" he cried back humorously as he shoved the cutting board into my arms and managed to narrowly escape my grasp by ducking underneath the kitchen table.

I threw the board against the sink, kneeling down to try and reach for one of Lee's legs as he crawled frantically out of the table.

"Get back here!" I growled in mock anger.

"No, otherwise I will have to explain my bruises to my teammates and I am running out of excuses!" he exclaimed as he managed to crawl out on all fours and scramble to the next room.

"OH, NO YOU DON'T!" I hollered with a laugh as I gave in to the chase.

It seemed Lee was astute in his escape considering he began to throw various medicine balls I had left in our living room table at me in a feigned attempt to meddle with my pursuit.

"Those took forever to make!" I chided, trying to grab each one before they hit the ground.

"They are all mud balls as far as I am concerned, even Sai says so!" Lee teased with a grin as he bought himself a bit of time and ran to the next room.

"You ASS!" came my retort as I set what little medicine I had managed to catch by the table again and ran into my bedroom.

The idiot was already anticipating my arrival as he began to barricade me with all the pillows I had carefully placed on my bed. His cruelty knew no bounds as he ran out of pillows and frantically grabbed my beloved stuffed animals I had cached throughout my childhood. It was the only guilty and immature pleasure I was allowed with my life, and Lee was throwing them at my face. I rescued my poor toys in a panic lest they hit the floor as well. I kept yelling at him to stop in a voice that did not know whether to cry or laugh at his stupid antics. My so-called sensitive lover was currently laughing at my desperate attempts to catch my childhood toys.

"I hope you know I'm going to kill you for this!" I threatened as Lee began to run out of my beloved animals.

It was only when the last stuffed kitten was caught and I closed my eyes for the most irrelevant of seconds that I realize that his inhuman speed had helped him escape my grasp once more.

"Get your ass over here!" I muttered under my breath.

It was only a matter of deduction to figure out where he was now. I spilled the toys on my bed before I hurriedly made it to the last room in the house where he could possibly hide from me and still manage to throw things at me.

His room.

And as my horrid luck would have it, his damn door was locked.

"You cheating coward!" I sputtered, not quite knowing what else to call him as I angrily rapped at the door.

"In what way did I cheat?" came his chaste question. The slightest notion of fear underlined his voice.

"You used your speed you jerk! Open up!"

"No, if I do then you will surely hit me!" he replied.

"No I won't!"

"Yes you will."

"Well, if I do you'll only have yourself to blame since you started it!" I accused.

There was a moment of silence, as if Lee was thinking of what to say to something that was obvioiusly true.

"…That was fun…" he finally chuckled.

"I will sleep in your bed _over_ the covers if you open up." I bribed cunningly. "And I promise I won't hit you." I added reluctantly.

I had him at sleeping in his bed as he used that same speed to open the door.

He was greeted with the equivalent of a tackle as I used my entire body weight to push him into his back. I was only sorry the bed had all too conveniently broken his fall.

"Well you caught me Sakura." He admitted defeat as I held him against my own body. "Now what?"

"I think I'll make you clean up the apartment from the mess you made." I laughed as I turned to my side.

Lee pouted and squirmed his way out of my arms like a reproached child trying to escape the clutches of their parent.

"Don't think you'll make me clean it all by myself either." I added, my mirth growing to curiosity as Lee rested his back on his bed and extended his arms.

"Come here please."

His courteous request was oddly fulfilled as I dumped myself next to him.

"Hah…so what now?" I asked as we both lied on our backs and stared at the ceiling. "Any particular reason for the sudden change in scenery?"

"Well…I suppose I should start by telling you the odd advice my psychologist gave me."

I quirked an eyebrow at the mention of that antiquated man who was probably reading in the midst of a pool of books as we spoke.

"And what, even though I'm afraid to ask, did he advise?"

"That we should probably start to sleep in the same bed…or at the very least start to take naps together."

"Egh, I'm not much for sharing." I confessed, narrowly missing a pillow chucked at me. "I'm very territorial. I kick. Just ask Tenten!" I continued to make light of the serious tone the conversation was headed to.

"Can we please not talk about your previous relationships?" Lee strung a sensitive chord as I playfully smacked him on the shoulder. "I am your boyfriend, not your late night partner." He decided to add much to my chagrin.

"Okay, so jokes aside…why did he suggest this again?"

Lee shrugged timidly. "I suppose he said it would help us communicate more."

"Communicate? We already do that by talking." I pointed out dryly.

"He said communication is not always verbal…he said it would help relieve stress…" he mumbled as he fidgeted with a blanket.

"_Stress_?" I asked in a rougher voice than I intended to use.

"Since we are not…" he cleared his throat before finishing, "_active_."

"We train together. Wouldn't that count?" I inquired, feeling a bit more defensive than the situation called for.

"Yes, but it is not a form of affection…he is talking about _intimacy_." He responded quietly.

"Ah…so…what…_exactly_ does he want us to do?" I asked, an overwhelming sense of cynicism coming over me.

"Can we please start by just lying down?"

"All right…just lying down though and nothing else." I said suspiciously.

"Lie on your stomach if you want." He offered, smiling as though hiding something.

"Why?" I asked defensively.

"May I please massage you? It is nothing sexual, I assure you. The doctor said even hugging and massaging did wonders for a relationship."

"If it's stress relief you want, then shouldn't _you_ be the one lying on his stomach for a massage?" I inquired, obviously puzzled.

"You do not mind?"

"Of course not, I'm pretty good at massage therapy. I can even help you release tension in your chakra points." I said, finding it difficult not to brag. "Besides…I've always wanted to give you one but didn't know if you're the type to like them."

"I do not mind, I have just never had one before…unless the painful checkups by Lady Tsunade count."

"No." I giggled, helping him turn over as I rose to my knees and folded them under me.

The slight moans of ecstasy and surprise were enough to put me on edge as I continued to rub his lumbar region with dexterous hands. I applied gentle pressure to his scapulas, pressing his tight muscles against my hands and slowly taking away the pressure. His ribcage moved against me uncomfortably before I held it down. Tense neck and cranial nerves relaxed as my fingers slowly rubbed against the skin, feeling the blood circulate and muscles grow lax.

"That feels wonderful." Lee mumbled against his pillow.

I laughed and bent down to his cheek, giving him a peck before returning to my activity.

"I'm glad you like it…you deserve it."

"For what?" he mumbled yet again.

"For always working hard and trying your best in everything. For being a good boyfriend who is patient with me when anyone else would have thrown me out of a window. For lots of things."

"Well, you deserve that kind of treatment. You are," a moan that would have sounded erotic had I not known it was from the massage escaped his lips before he continued, "a very wonderful woman."

"Now you're just brown nosing so I can keep touching you like this." I teased. "Now turn around, I need to massage your chest and stomach too. It's not often I give full body massages you know."

Lee all too easily complied.

"You need to teach me this so I can do it to you as well Sakura. I am afraid I would end up breaking your bones if I tried it." He confessed.

I shook my head and cracked my knuckles in preparation before continuing to rub his pectoral muscles.

"I'm not one for massages, I'm too ticklish." I replied. "But you can rub my hands, they hurt the most after training."

"Because of healing?" he asked guiltily.

I shrugged. "Lots of things."

Lee took hold of my hand and held it against his chest, looking at me intently as if trying to read my thoughts. He gave up as he sat up and captured my lips. Even his kisses were different after the massage. They were less erratic, more confident somehow. I could feel it as he took the lead and deepened the kiss on his own. His hands massaged my own, adding to the euphoria I was already feeling. My body slowly descended into his bed, my back landing on the soft mattress as Lee held the back of my head and ran his fingers through my hair. It seemed I responded well to cranial massages as I felt my head lean against his touch. He smiled against the kiss, allowing me time to get comfortable.

"Take off your clothes." I stated, not quite realizing how wrong it sounded until I said it.

"What?"

"Th-the massage, it works better if there's nothing between my hands and your skin." I corrected his thoughts. "Plus, it sounds…fun."

Lee pondered my words for a moment, weighing them before touching the rim of his shirt.

"I will, but only if you do it as well. I do not feel comfortable being the only half naked person in the room." He said with a chuckle.

Surprisingly, I sat up and pulled my own shirt off with ease before helping him out of his. Lee wasted no time as he pulled me towards him and planted a kiss on my bare shoulder.

"Would you like to proceed with the massage Sakura? There are other things I find more fun at the moment." He said insinuatingly.

It was then that I realized that his bare body against mine felt…almost surreal. It was the first time I was consciously aware that what I was feeling was his naked chest against mine (bra included). Flesh on flesh. Skin on skin. Lips on lips.

He rubbed his hands across my bare arms, my skin awkwardly making contact with his own. I shivered as my chest rose with his, my lips quivered as his heart beat against my ear. His fingers traced soothing circles over my back, his mouth laying light kisses over my shoulder and back. Strong legs were entwined with mine, legs that sensually slipped between my own and caressed my thighs. My arms found themselves wrapped around his waist, enveloping his figure securely while I warmed my cheeks against his neck.

"This is wonderful." Lee whispered in my ear before laying a kiss on it. "I did not think you would be eager to do this."

"Well I wasn't." I corrected. "But you were right…this is a really nice way to get accustomed to each other."

"Your skin is very soft…" he said with a chuckle. "it is much colder than I thought it would be."

"Yours is warm…almost welcoming." I mumbled. "I get chilly easily so it's a nice way to get warmed up."

"Did he say how much clothing we could take off?" I asked almost jokingly.

"He said we could do anything we wanted except sex….so…I suppose we could…also take our pants off for comfort's sake?" he suggested, sounding as if he was pushing his luck.

Again, the thrill of the moment left no room for rational thought as I began to slip off my shorts and throw them across the room. Lee held back laughter as I roughly tugged at his pants before they also joined my shorts on the floor.

"Done." I said proudly as if I had just gotten rid of some hindrance.

"Still…I felt like I needed to ask you before committing such osculation! Such lewd action! Such a-ah!" Needless to say, I had grown weary of his idealistic and selfless words and decided to shut him up. I yanked his hair when I heard his moans of protest and brought him into submission as he melted into my touch.

His hands automatically began to rub themselves on my shoulders and arms, forming soothing circles around my back and face as he tried to show as much affection as he could during our kisses. I smiled against the kiss and tried my best to caress his face with the tips of my fingers every so often. My legs slowly began wrapping themselves around his own before he cleared his throat.

"Sakura…stop." He said between kisses.

"What? No. Why?" I rebelled against his wishes.

His objections merely invited me to deepen the kiss.

It was only once I felt something stiff close to my legs that I nearly jumped back from him.

"…."

"I asked you to stop." He said, embarrassment evident in his face. "I do not wish us to go any further than what you want…"

"What I want?" I asked breathlessly.

Lee cocked an eyebrow in confusion, but waved it off as he slowly began to untangle our legs. The look of consternation on his face was enough to rouse my curiosity.

"Lee…what if…what if I want more?"

At this, he narrowed his eyebrows in a deeper level of puzzlement.

"What? No. Sakura, I apologize for my…state, but it does not mean that you have to humor me…"

"I am NOT humoring you. I am asking you seriously. What if I wanted more?"

Lee seemed utterly lost at my choice of words.

I refused to disentangle my legs to prove my point.

"You do not know what you're-!"

Without fully realizing what I was doing, I found my hands dangerously close to the rim of his undergarments.

"-Can…can I feel it?"

"…_What_?...Why? I know you will do no such thing!" he exclaimed.

I was taken back.

"Who says I won't?" I challenged.

A kiss to my forehead and a chuckle were my answers.

"You are a very curious girl, Sakura, but I am afraid when it comes to matters of sexuality, it is best you wait."

His reasoning held no logic for me.

"I'm…I'm just very curious."

_****_

I continued to stretch my hand down, seeing as how Lee continued to stare at me, but did nothing to stop me. His face possessed an unreadable expression as I used up the last of my audacity to finish the remaining couple of centimeters before the tips of my fingers came across something extremely soft. All the anatomy books in the village could not have prepared me for this. A bit of flaccid skin brushed against my index finger, but I could not picture it in my mind. He was of average to mid-average size (from what the anatomy and sexual education books taught me). Of course I would not be able to call myself a medical expert if I was expecting nine to twelve unrealistic inches, but I found that I was quite satisfied (if not ecstatic) with Lee's size and length. (If anything I would be a bit intimidated once the moment arrived.)

"I…I am sorry." I heard him mutter.

"Wh…what?"

"I am sorry if I am not what you-"

"You're…_joking_ right? Do you have _any_ idea how many guys would _kill_ to be your size! And it's not even…UP!"

"You do not have to-"

"Lee…I'm a _doctor_…I should know these things." I assured as I planted a kiss on his jaw line.

I felt him stir uncomfortably underneath my touch, skin rubbing against skin as he slowly grew accustomed to the odd contact.

"It feels…"

"Odd?"

"No." I quickly answered as I shut him up with my lips.

"Then what?" he asked, leaning his head closer to my own for another kiss.

"I don't know." I muttered, my fingers running themselves across the length.

"Tell me." He began to plead as his lips dominated my own and his hands began to encircle my waist.

I was unaware of when I began. I was clueless as to how I even _knew_ how to start.

But I began to gently rub my hand around him, wondering just how far he would allow me to go before he interrupted me.

He didn't.

His breathing heightened, his lips began to desperately press against my own, his eyes remained closed as he kissed me, but opened to make contact with my own whenever he could. Hands that were once around my waist were now cupping my face and caressing my neck. A strangled grunt fled from his mouth, yet he quickly silenced it inside my own as I continued my actions.

"It feels…"

"…Y-yes?" he practically choked out.

My whole hand massaged the constantly hardening organ, wanting to feel every vein, every throb, and every slight movement from Lee. His arms encircled me; pulling me closer to him than I thought was possible. I could not stop from giggling as I heard him release a barely audible groan.

"Why do you do this?" he whispered, his voice sounding as though he were under torture.

"I…I don't know." I answered honestly, gasping slightly when I felt it rise further up. "Maybe I want to see…"

"…See…what?" he whined.

"How long…you last."

At this Lee began to chuckle in the midst of his pleasure.

"That all depends…." He said, garnering a smirk before his eyes shut tight and lips parted to release a quiet moan.

"On what?" I asked, somewhat liking his attitude toward this situation.

"On how long you _wish_ me to last."

I contemplated the flattering answer, yet kept my swift moments around him as I continued to slowly run my hand against his now unyielding, rigid organ. Time progressed into a nonexistent hindrance. It was something that I gave little importance to as we kissed and nipped at each other's necks and lips. Lee was far too selfless. A partner's needs were…important…but that did not mean he had to sacrifice his own enjoyment for the sake of mine.

"Sakura…tell me…"

"I'm not going to tell you _anything_ Lee. I will keep on doing this until _you_ wish it, not when _I_ do." I assured with a playful nip to his lower lip.

His chuckles seemed enlaced with pleasure as I said this, but it did nothing to hasten his limit. If anything I began to wonder when he would say something.

"Sakura…" he repeated my name several times against my ear, each time with a different tone in his voice. "Sakura…"

The change in his voice erupted giggles from me.

"…why…do…you…?" he did not even need to finish his question.

"I'm laughing because you're just…you're…" it seems I could find no air to conclude my own as I felt him quiver under my touch.

"Sakura…I…" he possessed my mouth, kissing away whatever words we had left unsaid.

He shuddered again as though he were cold, I could only take it as a sign. I hastened my actions, taking the time to completely pull what I had in my hand out of his boxers.

"It's okay…" I mumbled incoherently between kisses.

"…No…it is not…"

"Yes it is..just..just tell me what you want me to do." I added with a carnal voice that I hardly recognized as my own.

Lee zealously shook his head as if ashamed to voice his thoughts.

"Faster…? Slower? Softer?..Or maybe _harder_?" I teased, going as far as to demonstrating each of my words with the following action. "Better yet tell me where you like to be touched."

Again, the idiot refused my eager suggestions.

A small groan as I gently squeezed his tip sent excited shivers over my body.

"Relax…I don't know why you're so shy all of a sudden." I said softly, trying to find his face behind his hands.

"It is a new experience…I do not know what to do…" he muttered back, "and I never imagined you…like..this.."

"Like what?" I asked, playfully biting his lip as I continued my actions with the same pressure I had applied in his earlier massage.

The sudden stimuli made him jolt at my touch. Although the situation hardly called for it, I couldn't help but giggle at his reactions. I could feel thick veins actually _throbbing_ against my palm as I intermittently slid my hand down his length. His slippery and smooth tip was difficult to hold with each twitch I received from Lee. My hand was already becoming damp, his breaths labored and bewildered as I changed my movements. His hands blindly caressed my face and lips, eyes still shut as if he were in blissful pain. Lips lowered to catch my own at a particular squeeze I gave him.

"Tell me where…" I whispered in his ear, hoping my voice did not sound as aroused as I felt at that moment.

One of his hands rested on top of my busy one, guiding me over tender veins and skin that elicited greater moans from him.

"That…that feels wonderful…" he said, voice lodged in his throat from the obvious pleasure.

Knowing what he wanted and what he liked was beginning to feel easy to me as long as he kissed me. It seemed whenever my fingers pressed against a preferred section, his kisses would deepen and his arms would rub themselves against me fiercely.

"So this is what a man feels like…" I murmured in amusement, realizing that aside from the usual and often bloody attacks to the thigh in missions, I had never seen a man's erection.

Lee chuckled and continued his assault on my lips, saying nothing, but moaning everything as I ruthlessly massaged his hardened skin.

Several minutes passed by continuing this assault on flesh and lips, with neither obstinate side willing to give in. I was beginning to wonder if his prolonged state of excitement was being taken as an opportunity to impress me.

"Lee…you can…come whenever you want." I said while my hand pressed and gently pulled at his erection. "Don't think that…you need to prove-"

"I am..not." he answered, his delectable tongue barricading my own. "…but I will tell you…that I am close…"

"Do you want to-"

"..No.." he responded, almost as if he knew what I was going to ask.

"It's fine…" I said breathlessly, "I don't mind-"

"I do not…I-" he abruptly pulled away from me before any pinnacle could be reached, being sure to keep me at arm's reach.

"Wh-what's wrong?" I asked coarsely.

"I…no…I do not…I do not want to…" he uttered helplessly as his shaking arm made a grab for a box of tissues by the nightstand.

I managed to grab the tissue before he did, threw it across the room, and placed my hand over him once again.

"I…I do not…want to…Sakura..on your…hand-"

With a shuddering breath, a final weary sigh, and the sound of his body falling back on the pillows, I began to feel something warm begin to seep through my fingers. The small liquid sped past my digits as a few drops trickled down to my hand and began to pool in my palm. It had taken me several moments to take in what had just happened, and wondered if the warmth I felt in my skin was really his own. His breathing slowly grew into long gulps of air, sounding as he often did whenever he had ran an obscene number of laps around the village when we were younger.

"I…I am..so…sorry…Sakura..please…forgive me…" he seemed to supplicate, his head burying itself deeper into his pillows in shame as he covered his forehead with both his palms and tried to calm his heaving chest. "I did not want…that…on your hands…"

Finding the tissues useful now, I groaned from having to leave the warmth of the bed to pick up the box and make use of several of the sheets to wipe off the now congealed white liquid sticking to my skin. I had no clue as to why Lee was so intent on apologizing as I quickly washed the residue off my hands in his bathroom. It was not as if he had done something wrong.

"Sakura…I am…I am…" he continued breathlessly as I came back and rested next to him.

I chuckled as I ran my fingers across his lower lip, smiling when I noticed a red mark from one of my less than playful nips. Small beads of sweat rolled from parts of his forehead not covered by his wrists, his body upon closer inspection littered with the salty water. His chest continued to rise heavily, his gulps of air sounding like desperate gasps, abs contracting whenever I touched them playfully with my nails. I had no way of knowing whether these were the affects of an orgasm or just his perturbed state by what I had done to him.

"I am…sorry…Sakura…" he was practically turning his apologies into a mantra now.

"Lee…you can stop now." I murmured in his ear. "Thank you…for trusting me enough…to do that."

"TRUSTING YOU!" he exploded as his head shot up from the pillows. "Sakura, I have just broken my promise to remain abstinent until I marry you! How can I trust _myself_ now!"

I stared at him as though I had not understood what he was babbling on about. "We're talking about waiting for _intercourse_ Lee…not stuff….like…well _this_…for example." I corrected as I lifted his boxer briefs the rest of the way up to cover himself.

"I am very sorry if I seemed selfish or rude in any way Sakura! I promise I will-"

"-promise you'll let me do it again?" I asked hopefully, holding back the urge to laugh.

"NO!" he exclaimed, the sudden jerk of his movements sending a trickle of sweat from his chest down to his abs.

'_God he'd better stop moving otherwise I will do it over again.' _I thought lecherously, biting back my lip lest I bit his.

"Lee, you have to stop being so juvenile about this!"

"_I_ have the most mature mentality here! _You_ are the one who wants the _sex_!" he accused as he choked out a laugh.

"I don't want the sex…I'm just a very curious girl…" I corrected tacitly as my hand refused to listen to my logic and pulled at his boxers.

"You have the mentality of a _thirteen year old_!" he nearly yelped in surprise and tugged his underwear back on.

"Does that make you a pedophile?" I asked innocently.

Lee decided to shut me out by smothering his face with a pillow.

"You are so…DIFFICULT!" he exclaimed the last word into the feathers. "You have no idea how bizarre this was for me!"

I only laughed and began to rub his stomach, making sure to massage his chest and neck as he lied on his back in complete shame.

"That was…"

"Horrible?"

"_Fun_." I admitted quickly as I lifted the pillow off his face. "It was very…sexy."

This only provided another reason for the already fumed taijutsu specialist to edge farther away from me in one angry scoot.

"I do not know why I even allowed you to do such a thing." He complained.

"Because you love me? Plus, you _cannot_ say you've never wondered what that would be like!" I teased.

Lee threw the abandoned pillow at my face, apparently missing as I caught it before it made contact.

"No. Not _that_ way."

I clambered the distance he had futilely traveled away from me on the bed and leaned in to kiss the skin behind his ear.

"So, have you ever wondered about the _other_ way around?" I tried to whisper seductively. "_You_ try that on _me_?"

I could feel Lee's skin burn against my lips as my comment was left unanswered for several moments. He turned his back to me, his arms enveloping a new pillow he had found.

"Why did you bother turning me on with that '_I'll last as long as you wish me to_' talk then?" I joked with a pout, trying even harder to sound sensual as I copied his still fresh promise. "Just to tease me?"

"Sakura…did it really?" he asked demurely.

"Turn me on? Hell yes." I responded with a chuckle. "But I'm just kidding around Lee, we don't have to do anything unless both of us agree to-"

I found myself gasping in delight as I was pushed back towards the mattress and strong lips began to kiss my neck, face, and mouth. My boyfriend's spontaneous change in attitude was one of the many characteristics that I loved about him. One moment he could be castigating me on the values and morals of certain subjects and then break his own beliefs in one swift shove. His hands roamed throughout my body, never stopping completely on my stomach, ribs, or chest. He began to chuckle as I unknowingly began to drift my bare legs further apart so I could feel closer to that…_flesh_ I had just roused.

"Lee…" I giggled as his lips began to tickle my clothed sternum with his intermittent kisses.

"Sakura…please tell me…what you would like for me to do." It was his turn to whisper in my ear before he gave it a playful nip.

I gave no answer, merely surprised groans and gasps.

"Please…_tell_…me." He begged, softly suckling my neck. "I do not want to fail you as a lover."

"You…haven't failed me…you idiot." I moaned as I felt a hand travel to my lumber region and to my rear.

'_This liar doesn't even __**need**__ my help!' _I thought, knowing he was probably experienced enough on his own.

"Sakura…I still feel we should wait to have sex." He said, massaging my legs all the way up to my waist, "But…I agree with you. Couples _can_ still do other things and have satisfying sexual lives."

He kissed my lips as I tried to snake my hand down his boxers. A hand stopped me midway before I could feel that different skin of his once more.

"Sakura…I wish to return the favor…" he whispered in my ear.

"But...I mean-y-you don't have to!" I stammered, my legs intuitively closing to guard myself. "I-I was just k-kidding!"

Lee gave me a look that either told me I was a liar or that he wanted to do it regardless of what I said.

"Sakura…" he leaned his lips against my own, teasing me with his warm breath. "Kiss me."

Like a mere foot soldier obeying his superior officer, I complied with his request and joined lips. One hand remained by my face, caressing my cheeks, neck, and resting cautiously around my ribs. His right hand, however, was nowhere to be seen, it was far too busy rubbing itself across my legs and teasingly touching my inner thighs. My body receiving a completely unwanted reaction, I began to stifle my giggles from the touch. Lee's hand tensed automatically, dazed at what do next.

"I-it just tickles.." I assured, "when you touch my thighs, it's nothing wrong that you're-DO-ING!" my voice nearly blasted itself out of my throat as I felt the touch of a cold hand completely cup the most private part of my body. His fingers rested themselves further in, but could do nothing else since my undergarment was hindering their passage.

"Did _that_ tickle?" he asked mischievously, his increasingly warm hand forming slow circles around me.

"No! That just felt really-CO-LD!" my whole body jumped as that same hand tired of the fabric and pressed harder against them, albeit still barred by my stubbornly crossed legs. The action had caused my arms to wrap around his neck, my lips breathing laboriously against his ear, my covered chest heaving against his own.

"Sorry." He chuckled as he kissed my neck. "They will be warm soon enough."

The implication his last words came with only heightened my breathing, making me realize his fingers were rubbing against the thin cloth. It was only when he managed to rub a certain sensitive part of me that my grasp around him tightened.

"Am I to assume that is your preferred spot?" he whispered playfully in my ear.

I could only nod as he waited for no answer and rubbed adamantly at said spot.

My back arched as he continued his actions, my legs comparable to ice cream at room temperature, and small sounds escaping my lips. Whines, stifled moans, mixed groans, and heavy intakes of air was all the input I could give Lee as he relentlessly used his thumb and index finger to fondle me. His lips found my own and pleaded for an entrance which I so easily acquiesced. Already I could feel the cotton fabric covering me slowly being succumbed by a warm thick liquid, saturating it until it clung to my skin.

"Sakura...may I please continue? Or do you wish to come this way?" Lee's voice sounded so innocent at that moment that I hardly recognized his tone from the rough teasing one he was using seconds before.

"I-it d-doesn't…d-doesn't mat-matter." I groaned, barely able to connect my words together under this torturing bliss.

He gently bit my ear and continued to ravage my mouth.

"Tell me, otherwise I will stop." He practically threatened with that new confident and rough voice I loved.

"NO!" I ordered, my arms bringing him closer to me and grinding against his hand. "A-all I…all I…all I know is that…I-I'm o-okay with it…as long…as long as you're okay…with it." I finally managed to say through choked whines of surprise and pleasure.

It was not just the fact that he was rubbing the counterpart of _his_ preferred spot, or that his middle finger vertically rubbed itself against my clothed lips, it was the fact that _he_ was the one doing this to me that made me love and react so loudly to the arousal of it all.

I could just _feel_ Lee smirk through our kisses as he momentarily stopped his actions (bringing the most undesirable lack of contact in my life), and played with the elastic around my waist. I lifted my abdomen up, tormented from the sudden stop of pleasure, and watched with surprise as he all but ripped my underwear from me, and flung it to the floor.

"They were getting in the way…do you not think so Sakura?" he asked sensually as his hand quickly grabbed me in place once more before I could instinctively cover myself.

"Y-yeah…they were." I moaned a bit at the sensation of feeling his bare skin against my own.

"And you already soaked them did you not?" he asked huskily as his fingers experimentally separated my folds of skin apart from each other.

"Y-yes." I puled, shivering in delight from his thumb rubbing against my increasingly throbbing arousal.

He squandered no time.

I felt a now warm slick middle finger enter me as easily as beads of water enter a dry sponge. I shifted uncomfortably at the odd and new sensation. I did not feel as if "a thousand waves of mind whitening pleasure were crashing into me as I was thrown into the throes of passion and lustful lunacy". If anything it just felt…_odd_. It was like something that hardly belonged had interrupted the bliss I was experiencing just seconds before. It was as if something of great importance had been paused. I, however, regretted ever squirming under him as soon as I felt the intrusion quickly retreat.

"I am sorry Sakura. Did that not suit you? You seem uncomfortable." He said worriedly with an expression of perfect disillusionment in himself as he took out his soaked hand away from me.

I shook my head in a frantic manner, my mind colliding with my emotions while in my wanton stupor.

"N-no…not at all!" I exclaimed, "I'm not uncomfortable- I..it…it just felt…_weird_…" I reluctantly admitted. "But…in a good…way…"

Lee cocked his head to the side in that habitual adorably confused fashion, but nodded in comprehension.

"Weird? Can you tell me how I can fix this?" he asked as if I were a piece of machinery that was simply broken.

I shrugged and looked to the side in shame, closing my legs to hide something he had already seen. My hands covered my newly exposed skin as I refused to face him. This had felt excessively awkward and bizarre, my body was pulling me away from the aching sensation between my legs and pushing me back to reality, to realize the extent of our actions.

Had I failed him?

Was he disappointed in _me_?

Had I…_ruined_ it for him?

"Sakura? Are you all right?" he inquired, leaning closer to me to look me in my eyes.

"Sorry." I muttered, bringing my knees to my chest in an attempt to hide myself.

"Why are you apologizing?" he said as he gently turned my face toward him. "This is new for you. It is all right. What did I do wrong?"

"It's not you…" I mumbled, not quite knowing how to word my sudden feeling of shame, "it's probably because I'm a virgin…I guess I feel guilty about…doing _this_…" It took all my will to finish.

Lee nodded, his reaction surprising me considering the heightened state he was in.

"If you still do not feel ready then we will stop." He said calmly. "But you should not feel guilty. It is natural to have these feelings and want to act on them…"

His thoughtful reassurance only made my cheeks burn brighter.

It wasn't fair.

It wasn't fair to Lee to be like this in the middle of things.

Of course this wasn't wrong. Especially if I trusted and loved the person. If I were some hormone driven school girl I'd have waited-but I was a _woman_ damn it. I was too old to feel guilty about doing something like this in the privacy of our _own_ apartment!

I licked my now arid lips and swallowed.

"Can…can we try it again?" I asked shyly, staring down at my feet as I hugged my legs.

"Do you not wish to wait? You look shaken up." He suggested. "I do not want you doing anything you are not going to enjoy."

"I _will_ enjoy it…because I'll be doing it with you." I corrected, looking at his eyes.

Lee appeared incredulous to my words, but sighed and took my hands in his.

"First…tell me _where_ all right?" he pleaded. "Otherwise you make me feel like I am hurting you or doing something wrong."

"I will, I will." I assured, my legs still held tightly together despite my agreement.

"So…" he trailed off, his hands leaving my own as he leaned in for a kiss and began the slow process of relaxing my tense legs. "Please tell me where you find it pleasant when you are alone."

I blinked in confusion, apparently not expecting such a forward question.

"When…I'm _alone_?" I gulped.

I would have been a hypocrite had I said I had never done it. I would have been a hypocrite had I sputtered out cockily about how "gross" or "improper" the mere _thought_ was. I would have been a hypocrite if I so much as stifled a giggle like an innocent and naïve girl. In my medical trivia books, polls showed that roughly 94% of women my age had already done it (and _that_ seemed like a low number to me). Years of studying under the Fifth Hokage and being bored would make someone know that, I suppose. Lee was of course speaking about masturbation: a physical activity deemed by textbooks and magazines as an "enjoyable, healthy, and safe" form of self pleasure. But just because it was "normal" did not mean I was ready to admit to _him_.

He seemed anxious for my answer that never came. "You have never done it?"

I swore I had a fever judging from the increased heat creeping to my face.

"NO!"

"So you _have_?" Lee continued to tease me as the same digit that had been inside me was now caressing my inner thighs.

"N-NO! Shut up! Stop asking me that!" I exclaimed lividly.

"Ah, so you have." He chuckled as his fingers formed small circles around my newly awakened self. "I have a feeling you take more pleasure in rubbing rather than actual penetration…"

By now he was dethroning Sai when it came to saying the most discomfiting sexual things to me.

"Lee…you're not helping…" I grumbled, trying to hide the fact that he was right.

He caught my lips as if asking for forgiveness. "So…here?" he asked for suggestions.

I let out a choked gasp as his fingers brushed against my throbbing nub.

"Judging from the look on your face, have I done the right thing?"

I could only nod my head in return. His strokes were firm and sluggish, allowing me ample time to relish the sensation. Lips pressing against my neck whispered for advice. I gave none, merely nuances of approval or distaste. His fingers once again slowly came to my lips and separated them, but dared not enter me. Impulsively, my legs were driven father apart from the now exhilarating experience. My panicking hands oblivious on how to react plastered themselves to my face, both covering my eyes and mouth to restrain any words I would later regret saying. The small folds of skin that were once dry were now slick with wet sounds as Lee continued.

"Sakura…are you all right?" his concerned voice probed no words out of me.

I could only give him a shaky nod as I bit into my lip. What I was experiencing now was better than eating my favorite food. It was better than drinking a tall glass of icy water after training during the summer. Hell, it was better than soaking in a hot bath after work! I heard Lee chuckle as I now felt a somewhat welcomed intrusion inside me. Two of his fingers slowly massaged my inner folds, making sure to pull themselves out and massage my external swollen skin.

'_This…this person is the first to see me like this…_' I thought, glad it was someone who loved and respected me above all others.

"Lee…go in deeper…" I persuaded, my hands letting go of my face and firmly pressing themselves against his back..

"Tell me if it-"

"It doesn't feel weird..not anymore. Trust me." I said with a smile.

His slippery middle and index finger went further inside me, so deep I could feel his knuckles pressed firmly against the outside of my saturated lips.

"I've read…I-I mean I've _heard_ that…" it was difficult to lie when I was currently feeling nothing but Lee's fingers venture around my walls, trying ardently to find what made me squirm in delight.

"And what have you read and or heard?" Lee asked with a laugh.

I gulped as I continued to feel his digits reach places I myself could never reach because of my short fingers.

"H-have both…fingers…palm side up…raise them up…a-and pull your fingers…d-do it as if you…w-were calling for…s-someone t-to come to you." I heaved, kissing his forehead.

'_Oh God…'_

If I loved Lee for having long fingers to stroke my hair before, then by now I _worshipped_ him with what else he could do to me.

"Lee…that feels…" I could find no word to describe what I felt at that moment as his middle finger adamantly searched and rubbed different sides of my soaking walls. I released a squeal of delight as I buried my face against his neck from the sheer unfathomable sensation.

"So this is how a _woman_ feels like." He whispered, smiling as he imitated my same realization while never tiring in his actions.

If what he was doing was not already an overload on my senses, he decided to use his other hand to fondle me from the outside, completely shoving me off the edge of concealing my moans.

I didn't care, I couldn't help but to groan whenever he heightened his speed at rubbing and slowed when he felt my back arch, I couldn't help but yell in surprise whenever Lee decided to add a thrust to his movements, I couldn't help but tell him to keep on going, to keep doing that there, to do it harder, like some immature school girl who had never even heard of sex up until now. That is what I was, I was completely unaware of the concept of sexual stimulation by a male, that was something no amount of medical books could teach me.

"Lee…I…I…" I stammered before instinctively hugging his body closer to me as his wet fingers shoved themselves further in, stretched me repeatedly, and searched adamantly for the most responsive part of me.

"I was selfish before…I needed to prepare you first…" he said huskily in self admonishment, "but you feel extremely wet…and very warm. I wonder if you know how pleasant you feel?"

The combined form of pleasure and flattery erupted a shuddering reaction resembling a climax throughout my body. I did not know what it was, but it made my legs involuntarily spasm for a moment before going numb. My weary arms and hands clenched one final time around his body before falling limply and uselessly by my side.

I was about to sigh in contentment before I realized Lee was still fervently continuing his actions.

"Lee, s-stop! I-AHh!" I groaned, his fingers becoming an uncomfortable sensation with my growing sensitivity.

"I will not. Not until you are done." He replied as if he had not given me an orgasm already.

"L-Lee…I…STOP! I already-AGH-HAVE!" I yelled, feeling the familiar and completely draining side effects of a climax slowly envelop me.

"You…you do not wish to come more than once?" he asked, his face adorably hesitant to stop all at once.

"N-no…I…I think once is more than okay for me…at least for it being my first one with you…" I reassured, my chest rising as a fast as Lee's was just moments ago.

Lee appeared to not be convinced, yet obediently did as he was told.

His fingers finally stopped, leaving me to wonder why even as they pulled out of me, it felt like they needed to be inside again. He lied next to me, yet stared at his soaked fingers quickly drying with the air of the fan above us.

"Sorry…" I mumbled shyly, "I'm a bit more messy than you…"

Lee turned his head over to me and shook it. "That is not a problem at all…" he said, "if anything it turns me on…" he added with a sly smile before turning back in fascination to his hand. "I apologize if I hurt you…"

"You didn't, and if you did you made me too wet to care." It was now my turn to smirk lecherously at him.

He did not seem to catch my facial expression seeing as how he was engrossed with that hand of his.

"Why are you staring at it?" I finally asked, feeling a bit uneasy and self-conscious of the fact that he was staring at something that had come from _me_.

"Sakura…would you…would you be…offended…if I…" he bit his lip, appearing reluctant to finish his request as he faced me.

"What? What is it? I won't get offended." I answered, although I knew I was paranoid that it might be something he didn't like about this experience.

"Would you be offended…" he cleared his throat before continuing the tortuous question, "would you be offended…if I tasted it?"

"_Tasted_?" I repeated, apparently puzzled before finally letting the matter sink in.

I was quiet for a moment or so, wondering if he had meant oral sex.

"W-why?" I asked with an uncomfortable laugh, "I-I mean…it's-"

"I am sorry, I should not have said anything." He interrupted before getting off the bed and walking straight to the bathroom. "I will go wash it off and-"

"Now wait a second!" I called out after him as I chased him into the smaller room.

Lee did no such thing. With trembling hands, he turned on the faucet and was about to rid himself of the sticky liquid before I took hold of them.

"Lee…you didn't even let me finish …if you want to taste it then-"

"-You are not comfortable with it, I understand-"

"-No-no! I'm sorry, I shouldn't have-"

"-It is all right, let me just wash it off-"

I grew sick of the banter and simply decided to dip one of the recently occupied fingers into those lips which up until recently, only my mouth had touched.

Lee's eyes grew in surprise, but said nothing as I inserted another finger for him to taste.

"See? It's all right." I said diffidently. "I was just a bit confused on how to answer that sort of question…it kind of surprised me…"

He pulled the fingers out of his mouth and swallowed, giving me a timid smile that matched his burning face.

"I…" he couldn't find the words for his next sentence.

"So…how _do_ I taste?" I asked, realizing I was unaware of that answer.

At this Lee simply chuckled, licked his palm in the most erotic way I had ever seen, and kissed me to give a taste.

The force of the kiss tipped me against the wall of the bathroom, bringing my half unclothed body to feel cold wallpaper. His now dry hands made their way back around my uncovered waist, pulling me towards him in a desperate need of contact.

"I love you." He said between our kisses, one hand around my stomach and the other all but inside me again.

I slowly placed my legs apart, allowing him access to my increasingly moist skin. My own hands pulled irately at my bra, wanting by some lustful urge to take it off my skin. Any form of clothing now felt superfluous, a hindering fabric that needed to be pulled away in order to truly relish this experience. My clumsy actions found no end as I failed to unclasp my bra properly as I opted to kiss Lee rather than separate our lips. I smiled at him once our eyes met again. My hair felt like a mess and by the look of the mirror to the side of me I stood corrected. It was unsettling, almost strange seeing myself in such a compromising position. As I stared at the reflection of Lee and I…all the jerking, grinding, kissing, melting, pushing, pulling, shoving motions was more than enough to elicit a moan from me.

"Do you like watching yourself Sakura?" Lee asked in a voice that dripped with excitement as he continued to kiss me.

"No…I like watching the things _you_ do." I corrected with a grin that hardly seemed appropriate for the situation. "Lee…in all our adolescent years…what would have been your reaction if you knew this was going to happen?"

"That what would happen?" he asked, pulling me off the wall and taking me back to the bed. "My feelings being reciprocated? Living together? You standing in front of me with nothing on but a sexy bra?" he joked.

"Everything." I responded, finding that those boxers of his were currently too uncomfortable to be worn indoors.

Lee seemed to be in deep thought for a moment, lying next to me and lending a hand in throwing the last undergarment out of the bed and into the wooden floor. I rested in a fetal position, still amazed at my reluctance to show my chest when I had all too easily shown an even more forbidden territory to him. His hands carefully pulled at my own, forcing them away from my chest as he leaned in to kiss my neck, revealed sternum, and all that remained of my still clothed chest.

"I would have been able to die a happy man." He finally answered, "But I still would not have believed it."

"Why?" I seemed to groan as his fingers rubbed my legs.

I suppose I did have a penchant for massages.

"Could _you_ of seen this in your future?" he asked, kissing my neck and shoulders. "Any of this?"

"No..but I'm glad it happened." I said with a slight grunt as those same fingers stroke my gel-like knees. "Ah…that feels good…"

"And did everything else feel good as well?"

"It felt _new_. That's all I will say on the matter." I joked, sticking my tongue out at him cruelly.

"I am _serious_ Sakura!" he said, slightly annoyed. "I enjoyed what _you_ did, if you would like me to be honest."

"I'm glad you did…although since it was my first time doing something like…_that_…I hardly think it was all that great." I admitted sheepishly.

"And _that_, Sakura, is why we continue to practice." Lee replied as if teaching a lecture. "Every day if we must."

"Sounds like a good plan." I said with a laugh as I attempted to cover myself with blankets.

Lee let out a complaining whine. "You are going to cover yourself already?"

"Yeah, I'm cold." I answered, successfully pulling the sheets over me.

"You are no fun." He teased, but accompanied me under the blanket. "I like seeing you like this."

"The 'I-just-had-sex-look'?" was my natural response.

He placed his hand behind my head and pulled me towards him in a protective embrace. His hands ran through my stomach and legs, as if wanting to repeat what we had just done. I giggled against his neck from the touch, but did not eschew it. Lips once again laid themselves on my shoulders and collarbone, paying special attention as they kissed both my closed eyes before ending on my mouth.

We lay side to side simply enjoying each other's presence, the events of what we had done to each other still fresh in our minds as our perspiring bodies began to cool. Lee's breathing was sluggishly coming back to normal, my own somewhat rapid and content. It had not donned on me that I was still half exposed next to Lee, my body was far too weak and limpid to even have the decency to grab my underwear. He, however, did not seem to let that fact bother him in the least. His eyes slowly met mine and traveled to the rest of my body with a mischievous smile on his face. I brought my legs closer to me, suddenly feeling timid over what I had willingly shown to Lee just minutes before.

He chuckled and brought a hand to my legs, gently separating them and caressing my thighs.

"No, do not be like that…" he pleaded as he pulled me closer to him. "You look beautiful like this."

"It makes me feel self-conscious.." I muttered, my face burning up when his fingers hooked around the back of my bra.

"You shouldn't. It only makes you look more appealing when you try to hide yourself like that." He said, leaning in for another kiss.

"You-you're not tired still?" I asked, my body tingling as he fumbled with the bra hooks.

"No. Are you?" he asked back, "Would you be offended if I took off your bra?" he added as if he were asking to pass the salt at the table.

"I'm not tired anymore…but-" I pushed his fingers away from me, impatient from his hesitancy and taking matters into my own hands. After some fidgeting I expertly unhooked my bra for him and set it across the bed.

I had already shown him half of myself, he might as well have the full experience.

My hands seemed more tentative in removing themselves from my breasts after I had hastily unhooked my bra. I shuddered as the fan's cool air touched the newly exposed sides of my warm chest. Lee's eyes were on mine, but I knew he was as curious to see what lay underneath my hands as I was of what was between his legs. I could hear his shallow breaths as he waited patiently for me to remove those final centimeters of my hands away from me. Slowly, my hands slipped away from me, revealing nothing but the now freezing air of the air conditioning in the room. It felt too chilly, it was like taking a dive in freezing water to me.

"You have goosebumps all over your body." Lee said with a chuckle as he opened his arms and wrapped them around my shivering form. "You do not have to show yourself fully if you do not wish it."

"B-but _you_ showed yourself. It's only fair that-" I found myself being pulled into his warm chest.

"What is fair is waiting for you. I did not mean to press you." He apologized, rubbing his arms vertically across my back to warm me up.

I smiled and brought my hands behind his neck, allowing both our bare chests to touch. Lee stiffened for a moment as he felt the new sensation against his skin, but only chuckled again as he brought his lips to my forehead, kissed my eyes, and began to form a trail down to my neck where he playfully nipped and kissed my jugular and collar bone.

"Sakura…you are a beautiful woman…" he whispered as he littered kisses all over my sternum and the sides of it. "You are soft…warm…comforting…"

I laughed and brought his head back to eye level with me. "I think you're having too much fun down there." I joked.

His face grew red when he did not realize I was merely kidding.

"Well…it is a side of you I have never seen…I wish to see all of you…" he justified his curiosity over my chest.

"What is it about men and breasts?" I joked again with a giggle. "They're so obsessed over them."

"Not so." He corrected quickly. "I am most fond of legs. Yours in particular. It makes me imagine I can get a firm grip while…."

I cocked an eyebrow, somewhat fearful of where this conversation would shift.

"Firm grip on what?" I asked, suddenly wondering if he meant that my legs were fat.

"Firm grip as I lift you up against the wall, for one thing." He admitted, and narrowly missed one of the stuffed pillows I threw at him.

_****_

His hands seemed to prove his point as they traveled to the top of my legs and gently rubbed at my skin.

"Jerk." I muttered. "You're going to turn perverted on me."

"Perverted is peeping on women. Is it perverted or wrong to fantasize about the woman I love?"

I shrugged my shoulders, feeling slightly awkward at the subject. "How should I know?"

Lee shrugged back at me and smiled devilishly at me. "Then again, why would I have need to fantasize about you? I have the real woman beside me!"

I batted his hands away and curled up my body even closer in a vain attempt to hide my exposed body. Meanwhile, Lee continued to stare at me as if I was the most fascinating movie in the world. It was not so much that it discomfited me, but that it made me wonder what was going through his often surprising mind.

"…Sakura?"

"Hm?"

"…Thank you."

"You're welcome, but I think we should use lubricant or something next time, maybe we can use-"

"I do not mean _that_! Sexual time is over, Sakura!" he berated with a laugh. "I meant _thank you_…for everything else."

"Ah." I replied rather flatly. "You don't need to thank me for anything."

He blinked several times, looking as if he was processing my words for some other meaning or just contemplating the weight of my words.

"Sakura…I am afraid you fail to realize what I mean. What _this _means. You saved me."

"You saved yourself by getting help…" I corrected matter-of-factly.

"Yes…but I had no one for support…you provided that. You made me believe I was worthwhile."

I tried to eschew the tinge of pain I felt at the mention of his past loneliness.

As much as I wanted to forget about the past, I knew I would always try to repent for not being there for him when he needed me most.

"Because you are my _friend_. Well apparently now you are more than that, but you understand."

I swallowed and ignored the wad of fleeting shame I felt in my throat.

"…I really do love you…you know that Sakura? I do not think there is anything I would not do for you." He said, once again rubbing soothing circles on my bare legs with his fingers.

"Likewise, you are my 'precious person'." I said, smiling at our own little childhood reference.

The man beside me suddenly stopped his actions, acting as if what I had said had put a damper on his plans with me. I half expected for his hands to pull away from me, half expected for his mood to somehow change as it often times did no matter how well his therapy had gone. Oddly enough, Lee's grasp on me only tightened in a reassuring manner. His eyes looked directly at my own and blinked several times, shifting slightly to the right.

"Sakura…honestly I…forgive me if I sound like a…a bold person….but…what do you want out of this relationship?" he asked with the alacrity of mud.

I felt my teeth click as I opened my mouth and closed it back up. I stared back at him, almost as if giving time to his question would somehow miraculously reveal an answer by itself.

"W-why?" I stuttered. "Do you think this isn't…what you want?...or what?"

My confusion knew no bounds.

"…What I want? What…I want?" He echoed his own inquiry. "Sakura…can you honestly ask me this without already knowing the answer? Why else would I still harbor feelings for you even after over a decade? Why _else_ would I even allow you to put up with me even through my depressed days? Why _else_ would I want you to live with me?" he asked indignantly, as if what I had asked had maimed his ego even though it was the same exact thing he has asked of me.

I lied motionless on the bed, frozen like the inattentive child who was asked a question by a scolding teacher. His hands had left my undergarments, but they had slowly crept further down to my thighs. Warm skin touched legs cooled by the air conditioner in his-_our_ room. My throat tried to swallow an imagery marble that seemed to appear whenever I could give no satisfying answer.

"I…well-how am _I_ supposed to know? I'm not _you_!" I reprimanded.

"Sakura, if I only wanted to be alone, the feelings between us would never have been mutual. If I still hated you, I would have not wanted see you again. Do you _really_ need a direct answer for something so simple?" he asked incredulously.

"Apparently _you_ do. So I'm ignorant. Enlighten me." I scoffed.

"Sakura…I cannot understand you at times..I really cannot." He confessed with a half laugh that revealed his agitation. "How would you like to stay here…with me?"

My face burned worse than when I drank sake.

"Stay?" I mumbled.

"Stay. As in...'I am yours'…if you will have me." He added the last part rather cautiously, aware of all the possible consequences.

"Are you…p-…" I suddenly reverted back to my preteen years, when saying the word 'like' was as hard as admitting your parents still tucked you in at night until you were eleven years old. My throat needed water, but I would give it no such luxury so long as I was still mature enough to handle the situation. "are you..._proposing_?"

"No, I am asking if you would like to be my roommate since I get scared at night." He said flatly, with all the sarcasm a gentleman like Lee could conjure.

My burning cheeks were the least of my priorities as I felt my entire body give way to involuntary tiny shaking. Hands that were once so assured were now quaking as they held on to Lee's hands for support. I was expecting to scream in delight, to giggle uncontrollably, to jump into his arms laughing and accept his offer. But that was not something a strong independent girl like me did…

No…

Instead…

I began to cry.

The trickle of tears stung my eyes as they began to flow freely down my face without the slightest care of my embarrassing state. A sob chocked any words I wanted to pull from my throat and threw them into the far recesses of my mind. I was shocked…as my ever dwindling luck would have it.

Lee appeared as if he had said he loathed me, his eyes narrowing in concern and hands instinctively coming up to my hair to run through my strands and scalp.

"Sakura? Sakura, are you all right? I did not think…oh I apologize…I am so sorry. What…are you all right?" he stuttered over his words, his experience with dealing with crying girls nonexistent.

I nodded my head in response, my mouth still arid and answerless.

He looked as if he wanted to chuckle, but refrained from such a risky reaction.

"Was that a nod for 'Yes, I am all right' or….?" He asked, utterly clueless.

I held back the urge to punch him with a chakra fused fist and opted to bury my face in the palm of my hands as if this would convince him I was not weeping any longer.

I felt his lips slowly descend into my clutched hands, kissing my knuckles before trying to pry open my stubbornly closed palms to reclaim my lips.

"Sakura…please tell me. Your silence is worse than any words you could give me." He pleaded as he continued to place kissed on my salty wet lips and cheeks.

I opened my mouth, but a sound resembling an approving whine and sob interrupted my answer. My head simply continued to nod as if that in itself was sufficient for Lee.

"Sakura, please…_please_ have me as your husband…I…it would…" words had deserted him as well.

We were left stranded in an island of silence.

I continued to bawl in front of him like a child who had been punished and pushed into a corner of the room. It was not that I sad-far from it…I was simply…hysterical. He was left helpless and answerless as he continued to hold my face in his hands. I could only nod.

A few moments passed filled with nothing but my incessant crying until Lee smothered a chuckle.

"A-are you…_accepting_ me?" he asked, suppressing laughter in his accentuated word.

I stopped nodding and pulled away from him, my mind now more preoccupied with searching for that box of tissues I often had to throw to the side of the room whenever I was together with Lee.

'_Where are you when I need you?'_ I mentally cursed as I fumbled through the bed trying to find the wretched box.

It seemed Lee had read my mind as he handed me the object of my search. I thankfully accepted it and pulled more tissues than I needed out and wiped my ever running eyes and nose.

"Are you _really_ accepting me?" he did not bother to hold back his amusement with me any longer as he let out a laugh.

"Stop…laughing." I ordered between sniffing and blowing my nose.

At least the worst of the fit had subsided and speech was slowly returning to me.

Lee did not care for my plea as his laughter grew partly out of relief.

"Sakura, are you telling me you would like to have _me_ as your husband?" he asked in disbelief.

"Not if you…keep laughing." I threatened.

This only made him laugh harder as he pulled the tissues away from my face and claimed my lips.

"Then why do you keep crying?"

"Why don't you LET me cry? Damn it, you just _proposed_, how the in the hell am I SUPPOSED to act!" I barked, somehow taken back by his kiss.

"Please do not do such a thing! This is not meant to be a sad moment…"

"I'll damn do whatever the hell I damn well please whenever a damn guy proposes to me…" I muttered several colorful profanities under my breath before his hands pulled my face against his lips.

His mouth against mine made my body want to revert back to its aroused state before any of this had happened. Confusion, anger, excitement, and bliss slowly meshed and blended to form three simple words.

"I love you."

"You need to say 'yes' though. I mean, I AM glad that you love me, but I would much prefer a simple 'yes' rather than seeing you cry…" Lee managed to poke fun at my state and return my sentiments all while being the clueless and gentle man I had agreed to marry. "…otherwise I would just feel horrible for making you do this."

"You're an idiot…." I pointed out, "but I'll say 'yes' nonetheless."

I was met with the widest smile I had ever seen on Lee since we were children.

"Then…will you please be my wife?"

The foreign word rolled off the tip of my tongue like a strange new flavor that I could not describe.

"Yes…and you'll be my…_husband_? God...that word sounds so strange!" I exclaimed in shock, covering my mouth with my hand as if to catch the word.

My nervous giggles were soon accompanied by his nervous chuckles as we toyed with the meaning of the words as if we had never heard of them before in our lives. His hands reached for mine and he took it upon himself to drag my body into his arms, much to my surprise.

"My future wife…my other half." He whispered into my ear. "Sakura, I will try my hardest to bring you joy."

"And sex?"

"Correction…you are an insatiable future wife."

I growled at the sudden loud sound of steel slamming itself on the floor. The clank had roused me from my sleep and I was not too pleased with Lee seeing as how he had yet again developed a penchant for using weights for training and waking up an ungodly hours of the day when even the birds were deep in slumber. I lifted my head off my pillow long enough to see my husband picking up his immense leg weights that he dropped every couple of months for the past few years by accident.

"Oh! Sakura! Good morning, I am sorry, my grasp slipped on these heavier weights." He whispered rather contritely as he kissed the top of my head.

"I thought you'd stay a while, instead of going off." I grumbled, apparently not too pleased with his behavior.

"I must go train…but I will be back soon." He added as he sat across from me putting on his leg weights.

I growled sleepily and sat up.

"You woke me up…Lee…let's make love." I grumbled.

"I…I beg your pardon?"

"Let's. Make. Love." I repeated, making sure to enunciate each syllable clearly despite my drowsy state.

"But Sakura, I must go train right now, I am afraid it will have to wait until-"

"Are you breaking your promise Lee?" I challenged with a mock frown. "You swore you'd comply with this request before you left for your mission."

"Well yes but…_now_?" he asked in a shrinking voice, his face etched with surrender.

"_Now_." I nearly aggressed relentlessly as I clambered my way toward the edge of the bed where he sat.

The poor man had little time to think as I tackled him to the floor.

Lee would have to make up an excuse to tell his dear sensei for being late.

For today…I would have my way.

What I loved most about our relationship was the honesty within it. There were no lies between us since we had both been stripped bare (symbolically and literally) to show each other the trust between us. Communication was key in whatever new ordeals we were faced with (or so the old man said before he officially stopped giving Lee sessions.) Did we fight? Sporadically. Did we experience break downs? A few. Did we find a reason to give up and waste years of hard work and therapy? We refused to do such a thing.

With Lee, I learned that each relationship was different and anything but perfect (all I had to do was look at Sai and Tenten as the years rolled by to see that much was true). Love was a myriad of things for me. Nothing seemed specific enough to describe it. With him, love did not always mean cuddling and flattering each other. With him…love meant savoring the healthy moments while being strong for the difficult ones. It meant behind held when you felt weak and holding each other when you felt strong. Love meant passing through the different phases of love, past infatuation and lust, past fascination and aimless mawkish daydreaming. It meant finding new reasons to appreciate him and support him even when we knew his depression would never fully leave his life. What Lee had taught me was that people needed love in order to feel accepted and safe. Love with him simply meant…accepting each other for what we were.

Our relationship and marriage was by no means easy, as is the case with all partners.

It was by no means constant joy and endless physical gratification.

It was by no means perfect.

But part of loving Lee involved loving his imperfections and acknowledging mine.

So long as we did that…

It did not matter what kind of days or moods awaited us in the future.

Again, thank you for your kind words of inspiration and motivation that kept me going until I finished this chapter. You beautiful readers, you.


End file.
